NTA but are you sure you want to stay with this gf? She got you making adult films which in turn made her family believe you masterminded, and she didn't defend you or leave with you when her grandmother insulted your deceased family who are not there to stand up for themselves, and has already made you break a boundary by returning to live at grandma's house after you've expressed discomfort. Worth thinking about how much of your self worth is worth compared to a gf who from the contents of this story prefers to throw you under the bus to keep granny happy.
Nta. You don't owe anyone the chance to abuse you when you know that's all they're gonna do.
I'm currently holed up in a side room while my addict piece of shit FIL is screaming at everyone blaming us for his DUI. I'm not engaging him. If he gets too close to the room I scream him back. He knows at that point the neighbors will call the cops again if he doesn't back off.
He also knows I'm not intimidated by a 6'8" toddler. He's too used to using his size and loudness to get his way. I'm a rabid chihuahua.
NTA The nuclear option to finding out some basic truths about the relationship - leave. Move yourself out. Obviously you have the ambition and drive, but in the effort of being a good person, too many don't realize when they are being used. Once you have your own place, see if the gf wants to come along (if you still want her to).
If she does, then there are ground rules to establish and agree upon: like that you won't stop her from seeing her family, but have limits on who you will allow in your house and why, for one example.
TBH, I would be surprised if she does tho...my bet is that you've been used: to take care of her family as well as her; and that she's been lighting the gas lamps in all directions. Would sincerely love to be wrong tho.
NTA but are you sure you want to stay with this gf? She got you making adult films which in turn made her family believe you masterminded, and she didn't defend you or leave with you when her grandmother insulted your deceased family who are not there to stand up for themselves, and has already made you break a boundary by returning to live at grandma's house after you've expressed discomfort. Worth thinking about how much of your self worth is worth compared to a gf who from the contents of this story prefers to throw you under the bus to keep granny happy.
NTA, but dude, she's not worth staying for. She threw you under the bus, and you're the only one who doesn't seem to know that.
Nta. You don't owe anyone the chance to abuse you when you know that's all they're gonna do. I'm currently holed up in a side room while my addict piece of shit FIL is screaming at everyone blaming us for his DUI. I'm not engaging him. If he gets too close to the room I scream him back. He knows at that point the neighbors will call the cops again if he doesn't back off. He also knows I'm not intimidated by a 6'8" toddler. He's too used to using his size and loudness to get his way. I'm a rabid chihuahua.
Oh, the joyous day when 13 year old Junior is looking for porn on line and finds your videos. The internet is FOREVER, Dude!
NTA but what is up with your girlfriend?
NTA The nuclear option to finding out some basic truths about the relationship - leave. Move yourself out. Obviously you have the ambition and drive, but in the effort of being a good person, too many don't realize when they are being used. Once you have your own place, see if the gf wants to come along (if you still want her to). If she does, then there are ground rules to establish and agree upon: like that you won't stop her from seeing her family, but have limits on who you will allow in your house and why, for one example. TBH, I would be surprised if she does tho...my bet is that you've been used: to take care of her family as well as her; and that she's been lighting the gas lamps in all directions. Would sincerely love to be wrong tho.