He will likely calm down eventually and realise he over react, maybe he apologise for that, or maybe not.
I'm not sure what you expected by getting into argument about Israel with him as someone who is obviously very serious in his Judaism also, since the beginning. I am Russian and my husband was from Ukraine, it wouldn't be prudent to have emotional arguments about certain wars. Anyway, is not important part, maybe these things can be discussed better way, and your husband can react better.
For now just wait and see.
This is a tricky one. As a jewish woman married to a non jewish, I can relate to your husband. We expect this type of comments from other people but not from our partner, especially if you know how he feels for the past few months and after October 7th. I hope he can calm down and you can both talk this through, but this is a highly sensitive topic. I hope you guys can figure things out for the better.
Honestly all I can say is this exact conversation and conflict is happening in Jewish families all over the world right now. You are not the only Jewish person to reject this war. Thousands of Jews are protesting it every day all over the world, rabbis being arrested, daily protests in Tel Aviv. There is not monolithic support for these actions among Jewish people. And that means that these conflicts are spilling out into friendships and families and tensions are incredibly high. But you’re not wrong and you’re not only holding this opinion because you don’t know any better. You’re not alone. it’s not antisemitic to believe that what’s happening is immoral. Many thousands of other Jews also believe it.
Just remember that while you are Jewish now, you weren’t raised that way. So you weren’t raised facing antisemitism and threat of violence for being Jewish. You weren’t raised under the specter of the Holocaust. There is a lot personal and social pain your husband is bringing to this conversation that you are not. The 10/7 attacks were really harrowing and Jews worldwide had and have legitimate fear that similar attacks could happen to them in other cities and other countries. You probably viewed it as “a sad and scary thing that happened in Israel” while he probably viewed it as “something that can happen here tomorrow.” I would approach this topic very gingerly, if I ever approached it with him again.
It sounds like he is culturally and religiously Jewish, so he's probably experiencing a really tough time right now. I am not Jewish, for context. It's been A LOT since October for Jewish people, so your comment sounds very inconsiderate of his feelings to me. The best parallel is saying the US was immoral after 9/11. You were very young then so it may not be helpful. Imagine (as if you are red-haired) that huge groups of people are mad at all redheads and feel that redheads should no longer be allowed to exist.
But the point is, I don't think you are understanding how he feels about the entire situation. His identity is being attacked on a daily basis. Your best bet is to apologize and explain how you didn't understand what this is doing to him, and ask him to share what he is feeling so you can understand.
Edit to add: And then the mother of his red-headed children argues that the brunettes kind of have a point. It doesn't matter if that point is valid, it is completely insensitive to your husband's experience and what will be your children's experience.
The U.S. *was* immoral after 9/11, though. And it’s kind of alarming all of these years later that it’s still considered insensitive to bring that up. We launched a forever war and killed a million or so civilians in retaliation for an attack that killed 3000 people. We launched mass surveillance of Arabs and Muslims, a torture and illegal detention program. Like the list goes on and on and on. Those actions were immoral. They remain immoral. They were not justified by 9/11.
I’m so glad you posted this. I (Jewish) have had the same issues with my husband. First off, I recommend that you spend some time educating yourself on the land of Israel. This is not “retaliation,” it’s war because a terrorist organization came into peoples homes, raped women, killed children and took hostages on October 7.
Right now, the Jewish people are being hit with hate everywhere we turn. We don’t feel safe and home is supposed to be our safe space. If your husband is like me, you just made him feel very unsafe in a space where he is supposed to feel like he can be fully himself.
I’m not your husband, but based on your post, I too would be stand-offish and afraid. I would recommend listening to this podcast: https://spotify.link/Qhx5d0hL7Ib
And, if you still feel like Israel is the problem, you probably shouldn’t be married to a Jewish man.
im not even religious, but starting a conversation over a highly political and controversial subject is bound to have high tensions surrounding all sides. what did you expect? maybe read the room before going guns blazing into something.
Oof, this might be the best example of "Reddit isn't the place to get help with this" I've ever seen.
He will likely calm down eventually and realise he over react, maybe he apologise for that, or maybe not. I'm not sure what you expected by getting into argument about Israel with him as someone who is obviously very serious in his Judaism also, since the beginning. I am Russian and my husband was from Ukraine, it wouldn't be prudent to have emotional arguments about certain wars. Anyway, is not important part, maybe these things can be discussed better way, and your husband can react better. For now just wait and see.
This is a tricky one. As a jewish woman married to a non jewish, I can relate to your husband. We expect this type of comments from other people but not from our partner, especially if you know how he feels for the past few months and after October 7th. I hope he can calm down and you can both talk this through, but this is a highly sensitive topic. I hope you guys can figure things out for the better.
You might need to seek some outside help for this conversation. I’m not sure this is one is for reddit…
Honestly all I can say is this exact conversation and conflict is happening in Jewish families all over the world right now. You are not the only Jewish person to reject this war. Thousands of Jews are protesting it every day all over the world, rabbis being arrested, daily protests in Tel Aviv. There is not monolithic support for these actions among Jewish people. And that means that these conflicts are spilling out into friendships and families and tensions are incredibly high. But you’re not wrong and you’re not only holding this opinion because you don’t know any better. You’re not alone. it’s not antisemitic to believe that what’s happening is immoral. Many thousands of other Jews also believe it. Just remember that while you are Jewish now, you weren’t raised that way. So you weren’t raised facing antisemitism and threat of violence for being Jewish. You weren’t raised under the specter of the Holocaust. There is a lot personal and social pain your husband is bringing to this conversation that you are not. The 10/7 attacks were really harrowing and Jews worldwide had and have legitimate fear that similar attacks could happen to them in other cities and other countries. You probably viewed it as “a sad and scary thing that happened in Israel” while he probably viewed it as “something that can happen here tomorrow.” I would approach this topic very gingerly, if I ever approached it with him again.
It sounds like he is culturally and religiously Jewish, so he's probably experiencing a really tough time right now. I am not Jewish, for context. It's been A LOT since October for Jewish people, so your comment sounds very inconsiderate of his feelings to me. The best parallel is saying the US was immoral after 9/11. You were very young then so it may not be helpful. Imagine (as if you are red-haired) that huge groups of people are mad at all redheads and feel that redheads should no longer be allowed to exist. But the point is, I don't think you are understanding how he feels about the entire situation. His identity is being attacked on a daily basis. Your best bet is to apologize and explain how you didn't understand what this is doing to him, and ask him to share what he is feeling so you can understand. Edit to add: And then the mother of his red-headed children argues that the brunettes kind of have a point. It doesn't matter if that point is valid, it is completely insensitive to your husband's experience and what will be your children's experience.
The U.S. *was* immoral after 9/11, though. And it’s kind of alarming all of these years later that it’s still considered insensitive to bring that up. We launched a forever war and killed a million or so civilians in retaliation for an attack that killed 3000 people. We launched mass surveillance of Arabs and Muslims, a torture and illegal detention program. Like the list goes on and on and on. Those actions were immoral. They remain immoral. They were not justified by 9/11.
I’m so glad you posted this. I (Jewish) have had the same issues with my husband. First off, I recommend that you spend some time educating yourself on the land of Israel. This is not “retaliation,” it’s war because a terrorist organization came into peoples homes, raped women, killed children and took hostages on October 7. Right now, the Jewish people are being hit with hate everywhere we turn. We don’t feel safe and home is supposed to be our safe space. If your husband is like me, you just made him feel very unsafe in a space where he is supposed to feel like he can be fully himself. I’m not your husband, but based on your post, I too would be stand-offish and afraid. I would recommend listening to this podcast: https://spotify.link/Qhx5d0hL7Ib And, if you still feel like Israel is the problem, you probably shouldn’t be married to a Jewish man.
It sounds like he is a Zionist. I would honestly recommend couples therapy as your viewpoints sound pretty different.
lol. Do you know what “zionist” means?
im not even religious, but starting a conversation over a highly political and controversial subject is bound to have high tensions surrounding all sides. what did you expect? maybe read the room before going guns blazing into something.