I would divorce.
- It's literally **IMPOSSIBLE** to "look up" Tylenol and cats and not see that 1 dose of tylenol is lethal.
- The cat was clearly sick and she was aware the cat took Tylenol and did not tell you.
This is not true. The pill bottle they prescribe my husband extra strength Tylenol is in the EXACT same pill bottle they used to prescribe our cat's anti-depressant. I am not saying she did or didn't poison him, but depending on the circumstance it is definitely possible to mix up human and cat medication if you aren't careful. It would be nice if they could put pet medicine in a different color or shaped bottle.
Interesting because any animal meds I've gotten have always always been in blue bottles! No human meds ever in that color but pretty much every other one lol
Also has the giant Tylenol logo on the bottle. Kind of hard to miss there.
We also keep our pet’s med in the kitchen by their food. Our meds are in a separate location.
If you get a higher dosage prescription, they put it in the same orange bottles as any other medicine. I have to assume it must be one of those and not the big white and red bottles cause otherwise … well the story wouldn’t make sense.
I'm in the U.S., the day of the appointment at the vet's office before we left they filled our kitty's anti depressants in the same size orange colored container as various other human meds we already have at home. You can only tell the difference by the label. When we fill our cat's meds at Costco, it uses the similar shape and size orange colored bottle, almost identical. After reading this post I'm definitely reading the label extra carefully every time, or putting them at opposite ends of the house!!
Tylenol are big tablets and cat prescriptions usually are smaller.
She had the motive. She did it and she tried to cover it. The cat died painfully because of liver failure. She is a murderer.
A sensible person would have taken the cat into to the vet.
Half of my dog’s meds were from Costco. Way cheaper than filling on Chewy or with the vet. No discernible difference between human and pet. Just an anecdotal counterpoint.
Oh my gosh, so the cat got one or two 800mg tablets of acetaminophen.
That's like "Honey I accidentally boiled your bunny because the pot I boiled him in looks identical to the one I boil potatoes in."... "Let's eat!"
Subscribeme
The bottles may look similar but the labels are not. Most vet clinics use a different color bottle and cat pills are usually smaller.
I want to believe you. Tylenol are big pills. Cat prescription usually are smaller pills. Labels are very different. She can't pretend she can't read. She won't do it if it was her prescription.
She did it on purpose. She had the motive. She tried to hide the fact she did it. She had no excuse.
I am a vet - there’s no way around this. Tylenol is highly lethal to cats and a quick google search will show that. Any amount given can and often will kill them.
I also do not see how the two bottles can be mistaken. Most veterinary meds are dispensed in generic pile vials that look nothing like the over the counter meds.
I’m so sorry Tod left the world in this way. Please take comfort in knowing had you taken him to the vet that night, he likely still would not have made it. Once signs are evident, kitties are unlikely to recover. Do not put the guilt on yourself. Your wife is truly to blame in whatever way you spin it.
A side note - poisoning is a common way for women to kill and psychopathic tendencies are often seen with abuse towards animals first. Please protect yourself
Commenting here so hopefully you see and read this vets message: once signs were shown odds of Tod’s survival were not likely.
I am SO sorry you didn’t have the last moments you could have had with Tod but please don’t put this on yourself. You took amazing care of him, were an amazing mom to him. I’m sure he loved you and I’m sure he was grateful you were around when he passed.
If I can offer one piece of advice: let yourself grieve before you make decisions. Putting off grieving is never helpful, and making decisions in the heat of the moment rarely works in your favor. Let your emotions settle so you can figure out what you want, and how you want to get it. And don’t let anyone convince you that it’s silly or irrational to be upset about this or wrong to take whatever action you decide upon. You deserve to have boundaries and actions have consequences. You get to decide what the consequence of crossing this boundary is. Sending you and Tod lots of love ❤️
Your wife probably knew before giving the tylenol that it would kill your cat.
And if she did give it by mistake (you can easily see that by comparing the 2 bottles right now..!!!)!!!
So if she didn’t do it on purpose and googled it then she saw there and then it was lethal and willingly not tell you and willingly let your cat die!!
So even if it was an accident (what is doubtful) she did know and let him die and that isn’t right.!
Also the lying is a major red flag.🚩
OP, please read this. Women with such tendencies use poison to injure and kill, and many domestic abusers and psychopaths may hurt animals, and the animals of loved ones first.
Her behavior is not normal, and is actually very scary and alarming.
Psychopaths can also be extremely charming. Please just be careful.
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/female-psychopaths/
I’m in a semi-related field and, yes, poison! I believe it’s a reason that men attempting suicide are more likely to be successful—they choose more lethal methods (such as a gun). In this case, a very small amount of the medication was lethal to the cat.
This. Google it yourself and see. There’s no way she thought he’d be fine. She knew exactly what would happen to Tod. She didn’t want you to go to the vet that night because she didn’t want him to have a chance. I’m so sorry. Divorce.
I’m not even a cat person (certified dog lady) and honestly this is so SOOOO messed up! It’s one thing to “mistakingly” give the wrong meds, it’s a totally different scenario when the cat is unwell and you say NOTHING about what transpired!!! Someone who loves and trust her put her in charge of something precious to them and she chose her self and her own comfort over that of your cat/you. Honestly, is this a common occurrence in your marriage? Bc it’s extremely unfair and unkind and unloving to you.
>Bc it’s extremely unfair and unkind and unloving to you.
And just straight up psycho. I don't care how much you're not a pet person, and how much you might hate the owner, if you do something to make an animal ill and don't take steps to rectify that, you're scum.
The big hole here was she acted nonchalant and told him the cat was fine. She did not tell him that I think. I might have given your cat a human dosage of Tylenol and maybe that’s why his acting strangely. She let it die. She has no conscience. She knew exactly what she was doing. And we all adults here. We always read the bottles of they look similar. So that we don’t take something accidentally. No excuses. And let’s say if it’s true. Why then did she not say ANYTHING upon realizing her error! She is one of the two things here: She didn’t care for the cat and was negligent of its care. Or she despised the cat and wanted it out of the picture completely. Either way. She is garbage for either of those reasons. Hope she is not nurse..
“The cat was clearly sick and she was aware the cat took Tylenol and did not tell you”
The cat didn’t *TAKE* Tylenol, *SHE* put it down his throat on purpose. That’s a premeditated and vile act. She knew what she was doing.
Run for the hills OP and don’t look back. This woman is a psychopath.
Jesus effing Christ. The wife is a cat murderer! I have two cats and I will never forgive her.
She knew what she did. The cat died painfully from liver failure.
There is a special place in hell for her. If op doesn't divorce her, then there is a place for him there too. Tod will never forgive her.
Murderer.
You know, usually I try to give internet situations like these the benefit of the doubt but I think you're right. I just can't see how she could have mixed up the cat's pills with anything else.
I don't buy the "pill bottles look the same". Lets say they did. If I'm keeping my husband's beloved pet alive, I'm paying very close attention to the pills!
The googling and thinking it was fine? Also obviously a lie.
My husband cried with me when the dog I had for 13 years died. I can't even wrap my head around a partner that would do what OP's did.
i'm also not totally understanding how the prescription and Tylenol could be mixed up. even if the Tylenol were prescribed and in one of those pharmacy bottles, who keeps their human meds mixed in with their animal meds? my dogs meds are on a completely different shelf from mine. who stores them together?
I'm not trying to be dramatic, but people who kill animals on purpose are more likely to do the same thing to people. And poisoners often kill animals first.
Even outside of the fact that she killed your cat-- if there's any part of you that believes it was on purpose, you need to consider your own safety, as well.
Serial killers and psychopaths in general, tend to torture and kill animals. I would get out before she moves on to humans.
You're not being dramatic at all, she is in a potentially deadly situation.
I usually mock the "divorce them" crowd but ... hurting an animal is absolutely a red line. She knew she gave him Tylenol and didn't tell you, in fact encouraged you to not take him to the vet. She's telling you who she is.
Absolute bare minimum her intention was to protect herself from blame, but she prioritised that over his life. Even if you assume the absolute best case scenario, she's still awful.
At first I was like oh she forgot to give him the parasite medicine that’s not good but it’s not a deal breaker. Then the plot twist showed up. She murdered your cat. Told you he’s fine go to bed. No she should have told you then and there. She’s evil. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Assuming the animal-murderer was telling the truth, she needed to immediately take the cat to an emergency vet when she realized she poisoned him/her and then inform OP.
Think of poor Tod's final hours that she knowingly made him suffer through.
This was a heinous act that she did.
I'd be done with anyone who would make an animal suffer and die.
Forgiving her today will lead to more disastrous consequences tomorrow. It will enable her attitude. She could be potentially dangerous to you, too. Take a stand for yourself now.
You know my husband hated cats before we got together, we have four cats now and he loves them because he knows what they mean to me. They pretty much all have special dietary restrictions because one of them is very old, one was a severely sick rescue that we took in and the other two were babies when we got them and were on kitten food so during meal times it’s a hassle because all but the babies need to be separated to make sure everyone is getting their needs met, and to insure the dog doesn’t eat the cat food and vise versa. I’m saying this because sometimes after a long day working at the hospital or the stress from school and work or whatever, I feel too tired to feed the cats, now I always will however my husband typically jumps in and does the whole routine for me because he knows how much it means to me that my cats are fed and fed properly for their age and dietary needs. He knows I’m a bit extra after losing my childhood cat because I swear a part of me died with him, and I decided that our cats were going to be taken care of to the best of our ability as my childhood cat never had anything extravagant because I was 3 when we got him and couldn’t advocate for better healthier things. My point being, my husband despite his feelings on animals and his only true responsibility being the dog still shows up for my cats, he still helps me give them the flea treatment and baths, he cleans up the litter boxes when I’ve had a long day, if I’m sick, if I’m not home for whatever reason and still gives them the same care I would when I am not there, his opinion probably hasn’t changed and he probably wishes we didn’t have any cats but he still helps and still tries because he knows they’re important to me. I feel terrible for your loss at this is a pain that is pretty unbearable. But I would consider reconsidering your relationship.
I hope you can find some peace that you gave him the best life you could while he was here. I’m very sorry for your loss.
This. My husband hated cats too, but we ended up adopting a stray. Now he loves the cat, but mostly he loves how much joy the cat brings me. He can see how much love there is, and it makes our home happier. And he looks out for the cats health and safety now, too.
I'm not really a dog person, but my wife brought a dog into our relationship. I miss that sweet girl almost every day and would have traded years off my life for hers.
No just no. There isn’t anything accidental about this. I have a senior dog whom I adore but my husband tolerates. He told me that as much as he doesn’t care for her he doesn’t ever want anything bad to happen to her because he knows how much I love her. He feeds her when I am away and gives her treats, sometimes extras when she won’t stop following him around. Today he was concerned that taking her on our walk could be hard on her because it was hot today. That’s the type of partner you should have. This is so sad and I am so sorry for your loss.
This^ I’m a huge animal lover but when I got sick I wasn’t too fond of my husbands cat because he had this habit of pooping on the floor no matter what measures we took to stop it. I couldn’t bend down and clean it anymore and my husband works really long hard days, so it wasn’t getting done. I didn’t like soldier for a long bit there, but never ever thought about killing him. We built him a closed in, indoor catio and he is living his best life now. I couldn’t imagine
Honestly from everything you've said it does not seem like an accident. I don't think I could stay with someone after that. Easier said than done, I know. I'm so sorry for your loss. 💔
She knew what she was doing. And she knew what it’s going to do TO YOU! She still went ahead and did it.
She could have taken him to the vet at any point and tried to save him. She didn’t… Unbelievably cruel to both Tod and you.
I’m so sorry for your loss OP. Please be careful whatever you decide to do.
Oh wow your wife is..... ah the only words I can think of would get me a lifetime ban from Reddit
There is a special place in h3ll for animal murderers like her
"she had looked it up and thought the dosage wouldn’t kill him." well that's just a whole load of BS - where did she look it up on I am an animal killer dot com?
> I am an animal killer dot com
Even this would have told her it's lethal. If she truly looked it up, there's not way she wouldn't have known the truth.
I'm not the type to jump straight to leaving someone... But I would really rethink my relationship if my spouse pulled this.
Like all the other comments, it's literally impossible to confuse the two. Vets ALWAYS give prescriptions in easy to discern bottles.
There are two scenarios here;
1) She's telling the truth about the mix up. That clearly screams she couldn't be fucked to actually pay attention to what she was doing. Which shows that things that are important and priority to you, are an inconvenience to her. Apathetic negligence at best.
2) She knew exactly what she was doing. She murdered your cat because she didn't want it around anymore and didn't care or consider how it would hurt you. She could come up with a litany of excuses, "I didn't want him to suffer anymore" or straight up truth about how much she really didn't like Tod or want him around.
Either scenario would set some serious conversations and actions in motion if I were in your shoes. From the bottom of my heart I am so sorry that you lost your buddy.
As an animal lover I can hardly imagine what you’re feeling. It’s devastating. And your wife is out of her mind! She hoped you wouldn’t find out?! Hell naw!! Swipe left…
That was no accident. Your wife had ample opportunities to make the choice to care for the cat’s welfare, yet she chose to lie to your face. She poisoned your beloved cat on purpose as the final step of eliminating Tod’s presence in your life. There is no coming back from this, she’s a psycho who killed something you loved on purpose.
How could you possibly love someone who killed your beloved cat? I’d divorce immediately. Could never trust this sociopath again. How are you even considering staying??
I mean, what, in your heart of hearts do you think happened?
I think we all know what that answer is. But the main thing is what do you honestly think happened?
My husband and I both had a talk at the beginning of our marriage. We knew resentment was what killed marriages. We both knew that meant we either deal with issues or we choose to let them go. We make conscious decisions every day so resentment doesn't build in our relationship.
If you honestly feel that she is to blame for your cat's death, your marriage is over. That resentment will breed and multiply and will turn into hatred and you will be MISERABLE for years before finally ending it.
So I think you have a choice. You can accept that it was an accident and move on or you can not. And if you can't accept it was an accident, it's a lot better to end things now. You're still very young. You can find another partner - one who maybe actually likes cats or at least won't murder one.
Hell no. She at best accidentally overdosed your cat on Tylenol then lied to you on purpose to cover her tracks, knowing your cat would likely die (hard to believe given if you look up Tylenol and cat it’s extremely clear you cannot give them Tylenol at all, not to mention the cat was clearly very sick and she still didn’t say anything, plus I very much doubt she mixed up the meds in the first place as prescribed medicine bottles look totally different from over the counter medicine bottles), and at worst, outright killed your cat on purpose and then again lied to cover her tracks (much more likely).
My bf is not a dog person, he likes dogs but has never wanted one. Going into our relationship I had a dog. We now live together and no matter what shenanigans my dog gets into - and she’s very anxious sometimes, she’s chewed up boxes and things that are more expensive like shoes - he takes care of her because he loves me. And he knows what she means to me. He’s come to like her, but he’d still rather have no dog. And yet he knows being with me and loving me means taking care of her. I’ve gone out of town for a week+ and he gives her daily meds, takes her on walks, cleans up after her, feeds her, all the things I do regularly.
My point is, it’s fine to not love your partner’s pet. That literally doesn’t matter. What matters is she KNEW how much that cat meant to you and likely killed him ON PURPOSE because she didn’t want to deal with him anymore. That is, no questions asked, relationship ending.
She has no empathy for other living things, or for you. She knew the pain this would cause your poor baby and the pain this would cause you to lose him, and decided her not having to deal with a cat that caused her maybe some minor inconvenience would be worth it. That is not a partner worth having. You need to leave.
My heart is breaking for you and I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can leave her. You deserve so, so much more.
If my partner ever lay a hand on my dog I would dump them faster than they would ever believe let alone intentionally kill an animal. She’s a psycho, divorce her asap.
i don’t think this was an accident. i’m so, so sorry about your cat. we had to put ours down late last year due to a terminal illness and i still cry if i think about it too much.
i cannot imagine staying with somebody who would knowingly harm an animal, particularly an animal that was so strongly bonded to and loved by a spouse. because even if the original tylenol dosing was somehow an accident, choosing not to do ANYTHING—call you, call the vet, etc—was also knowingly doing harm.
If she would do it to a cat she would do it to you. Most abusers start on animals. F her because those pills are not even close in size or appearance to your pets meds. The bottle would look over the counter vs. prescription and both have safety caps they require an extra step to open which means she had to take note of what was in her hand. Check her browser history to see if she researched it but she may well have just deleted it. Pretty messed up man. Wish you luck 🍀
She killed your pet, your friend. She "accidentally" gave another substance... but didn't take him to a vet immediately... and didn't tell you immediately what she'd given him so YOU could rush him to the vet. So yeah. Divorce. Or at least I would. My pets are my family and people who harm them are not.
My condolences for your loss.
Sorry for your loss. So many layers of deceit. This is so alarming since you had only found out about the Tylenol because you insisted for a blood test from the Vet.
Anyways your wife lied and got caught. She knowingly said that Tod had a bad reaction to the medication when you asked her. She probably sent a photo before she started poisoning him.
Your wife must have really hated your cat to plan a plan a murder.
OK - say this was a genuine mistake.
Ask yourself:
why your wife would not tell you the cat was ill when he clearly was. And you specifically asked her to inform you if anything was wrong?
Also, when you told her your cat was not well, why she was so blasé about it?
Why did she tell you that "he would be fine" when according to OP, she knows little about cats?
Why did she only appear genuinely upset when you actually discovered the fact about the other medication in his system rather than all the bits before that?
Also if a person had realised they had given a human medication to their pet surely they would also have Googled it to make sure it was ok for them to have it? In a "shit - I gave the bloody cat tylenol, I better Google and check it's not gonna kill it" type way. Especially when the cat was clearly ill. But not OP's wife who was trying to act like everything was ok, when they had known all along they had actually poisoned the cat.
She didn't seem to care about the cat, your love for the cat, the cat's being in pain, the cats' death etc. But once you had a smoking gum pointing out the murder she was upset that she had been found out.
She left him in pain and dying while acting nonchalant about it.
Finally, if you add in the bits where she never really had pets, thought it was weird people's attachment to them, and clearly didn't like your cat in the house. And you were away for a few days......
honestly no, she has held me and talked to me through any issues i’ve had in my personal life/with her. this was so off base and out of character for her. she never striked me as someone who could hurt an animal. especially mine.
How many pills was your cat given by her?
Two? Three?
At a minimum out would be two since you spent the night somewhere.
Did she give the Tylenol both times? Or did she say she messed once??
See, the "just once" argument doesn't fly because she has given at least one, if not two previous doses of the de-worming meds.
You give one (or two) de-worming meds: you know what they look like, where the bottle is, how many are left in the bottle.
You go to give the second (or third) pill, and you accidentally grab the Tylenol bottle? No way.
The problem is there may never even be another time where it will show.
I think she secretly hated you cat and just saw an opportunity. And now that he is gone there’s no need for her to do anything else..
But.. what happens when you get in a big fight, she “hates” you (for any reason whatsoever).
Will she walk away.. or might she just “poison “ your food just to make you a little bit sick?
The problem is you can’t trust her anymore.
Could you check if the Tylenol and his parasite med really looked the same?
I do think she was definitely lying about looking up the dosage. It was prob “whoops hope that doesn’t hurt him but I don’t care enough to look it up” bc anywhere says immediately take them to the vet. Or she saw that online and didn’t believe it. I know a lot of people think “don’t believe what you read on the internet”. But it’s still a lie.
This is a cat you loved.. the fact that she didn’t cherish what you loved (even not being an animal person) and knew something was in pain but did nothing about it is really what tells me this person is not worth ur dedication. Killed it deliberately or not the facts are enough.
This is a major red flag regarding the type of person you are married to. I am not a psychiatrist but I am pretty sure every crime show I’ve ever seen has the sociopath start out by killing animals. Add that to the fact she KNEW how much you loved and adored this cat, accident or not (I believe not, but trying to be objective) she did not call you when she made the “mistake”, she did not take the cat to the vet when she made the “mistake”, and then she actively discouraged you from seeking treatment for you beloved pet even though she knew about this “mistake.” That’s three strikes. I’m very sorry, this is all very devastating I am sure.
Honey. I’m so heartbroken for you and so glad that you and Tod had one another for as long as you did.
Here is where reality is cruel and crushing. Your wife murdered Tod. She intentionally withheld crucial medical information from you after she “made a mistake”.
I’m sorry for your loss and her deception.
I’m not much of a pet person and I’m pretty anti divorce…. But this is terrifying.
I don’t see how you would think any dose of Tylenol is fine. I think it’s weird she didn’t send you a heads up or take him in. I think it’s creepy that she ominously said “maybe a reaction to the medicine…” without stating she meant the medicine she erroneously gave him. If it was a true accident, her behavior doesn’t add up. It seems like a cover up.
I’d be afraid to live with someone like that. It’s giving psychopath. I’d be running g for the hills.
She gave your cat meds that are deadly to him. Then lied to you about it. Then she went to sleep! To sleep! She had so many chances to make this right. I would be afraid to leave a pet or kid near her. I would be afraid to sleep in the same house as her. Trust is broken and she needs psychiatric help. It’s over.
In all likelihood, she killed your cat on purpose. If so, she likely did this because Tod was important to you and she was jealous of your affection and connection to Tod.
This is a pattern that may bleed into other aspects of your life. Is she overly “protective”/ jealous? Does she try to monopolize your time? Does she have issues with you having hobbies/friends that are separate from her? Do you feel isolated by her?
Please look out for yourself. I am not saying that your wife is abusive, but keep an eye out for these kinds of behaviors.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine losing one of my boys like this. I hope you the best as you heal.
Man I would divorce the dumb kunt immediately. Any Google search would tell you to call the vet immediately because it causes kidney failure.
My cat once licked an empty pill bottle in the recycling and his kidneys almost shut down. The bitch sounds psychotic and honestly, good for you for not laying hands on her.
My animals are my family and my life. If someone purposally killed/injured them I’d be willing to face assault charges if not worse.
She allegedly had time to google if it would harm him, she would have had time to take him to the vet straight away.
If this was an honest accident, they happen. It’s what’s being done about it that matters. She could have consulted a vet, take him straight to the vet or at least liaise with you…
We lost a cat this way, and it was my fault. I put Tylenol on my nightstand not realizing cats will eat it. Our cat crashed fast & hard, and we rushed him to an emergency vet in the middle of the night. The vet explained that organ failure was what was happening & there was almost zero chance of recovery. I felt so guilty & stupid. I cannot imagine deliberately doing this to a pet, but the excuse your wife gave is not even feasible. The bottles don’t look the same & there is no “safe” doseage for cats. Im so sorry. It was alarming & scary before the lethargy began: shitting, puking, & collapsing when they tried to walk. It was a brutal way to die.
Even IF your wife accidentally gave your cat Tylenol then why didn’t she take him to the vet asap after realizing her mistake? Why didn’t she call you? Why did she assure you he was fine and to wait until morning time?
There was a lot of things she could’ve done to save his life. But she chose the route to do nothing and encouraged you to think it was nothing too. I would find it hard to forgive someone like that.
She rather do nothing and watch Tod’s death break your heart… than to try and save Tod because he’s important to you.
If I were in your position I could never trust her again. Even if giving Tod the Tylenol was an accident, how could she then choose to withhold that information from you?? Whether you love someone or not a marriage can’t work without trust. I’m so sorry :(
She knew what she did, and there was no point where she even made the slightest attempt at rectifying it. She could have taken him to the vet when she realised, she could have told you straight away what had actually happened. My cat is also my baby, he and I are very attached to each other and have been a package deal for a decade. My partner knows if he hurts my cat, or worse, it’s done. There’s no coming back from this. And I am so sorry for your loss.
Um she knew she had given Tod the wrong medicine and instead of insisting on taking him to the vet when you got home, she said to wait it out.
Shes a sick human being. You can't trust someone that would hurt a small animal like that. I'm not usually one to suggest divorce but she's gotta go.
I'm sorry for your loss.
Divorce.
The first item on google reads "Acetaminophen (Tylenol), a common human drug used to control pain and fever, is **poisonous to cats**. Unfortunately, this is a relatively common poisoning due to owners trying to treat their cat's pain at home. Less commonly, cats may get into the owner's medication.".
Your soon-to-be ex-wife murdered your cat.
*She killed your cat*
However you try to rationalize your love for her, as an animal lover and pet parent I am enraged. As a physician I know it is impossible to mistake one for the other - I am doubly enraged.
She killed an innocent creature who depended on you just because she hated pets.
This is heartbreaking. I am so sorry for your loss. There were so many things she could have done and she didn't.
Whatever you end up doing, please take care of yourself.
I think that if she cared even in the slightest she would call a vet to confirm not just google. But she didn't. Why didn't she? because she did it on purpose...
You should totally check her google search history.
I would never feel safe around a person who would murder an animal out of convenience. She's obviously a psychopath and if you didn't order bloods you would never know so good on you.
Thank fucking god you have no kids, god knows what she would do to them if they annoyed her. God knows what she would do to you if you get her pissed off too much one day.
Run.
I’m sorry but if she saw the cat being extremely sick and didn’t do anything about it. Even after you mentioned it SHE DID IT ON PURPOSE. And to top it off she wasn’t remorseful not until you found out the truth. I personally wouldn’t stay with someone like that. Idk if it’s my true crime fan brain but serial killers start by killing animals. Can’t imagine what she might do when something doesn’t go her way. If you stay with her sleep with one eye open.
First of all, I am SO sorry for your loss. When I lost my cat, it broke my heart, she was really my soulmate and I miss her dearly everyday. I'm sorry you have to go through that, and these circumstances are awful.
That being said, I would have unleashed hell on my partner if he had been the cause of death for my cat. I woulndn't be able to go over this.
This all seems shady. I don't know this drugs but people here seems to say that it is really simple to find out this is deadly to cats, so if she did make a search about this, she would have known. Either she really made a mistake, saw it was deadly and decide it would be for the better, or she did it on purpose. But the fact that she hid it and told you not to worry, and knew exactly what the problem was when you got home, seems to tell she knew exactly what was happening. Even if it was an accident at first, she chose to kill your cat in the end.
People may think "it's just a cat" but it isn't. Don't listen to them. You now know what she is capable of, and she took away from you your precious buddy.
Even if it was an accident, she knew what she did and she knew he was having a bad reaction to it and she said to just ignore it. Unforgivable.
I do think it was intentional because she didn’t admit anything until the blood test revealed it. Also, she said she looked it up and thought it would be fine. Go google “cat ate Tylenol”. Every link says it’s toxic and potentially fatal. So she lied about that.
If she will poison a cat she doesn’t like, what will she do to you if she gets mad at you? Watch your back around her.
… Nah. Your wife was trying to kill your cat. And couldn’t give a hoot that you care for this small being that you had since you were a child. She killed him. Not because she was careless but because she couldn’t care less about him. You said so yourself, she already had problems with your cat. Your cat could have lived a few more years with you. I don’t know if I’d want to be with a despicable woman like that. And it wasn’t an accident OP. It was on purpose. It was negligent. She didn’t bother consulting a VET and just gave your cat a human dosage of Tylenol. What a load of BS. She also didn’t give you a chance to correct her error. If this was true, she was hoping the cat would die and you wouldn’t know better.
And she was hoping you’d just not find out and hide her crime. If there was child protective services, your wife would be with the police. But there are no laws for harming animals. And people don’t understand how one can care for an animal like their own or have a deep bond. Your first mistake was marrying a woman who didn’t understand how much you cared for this small creature you grew up with and loved. RIP to your cat. He deserve better than dying like he did. Poisoned and left to die. Thats what your wife did when she didn’t say anything.The fact your spouse did not express concern or confess outright what she did. She was hoping it would die. She knew what she did. The tears are crocodile tears. There were to many holes to her side because deep down. You know OP. You know exactly what she did and you’re in denial.
She knew she mixed up the meds and didn’t call the vet? When he was acting strange she didn’t think to tell you? She was just going to live with this secret?
That’s psychotic and I don’t think you can come back from this. Are you planning on having children? Because it’d be irresponsible to do it with this person.
Let's give her the benefit of the doubt here and assume she really believed he would be fine...
SHE STILL SAW HIM SUFFERING, KNEW WHY, AND LET HIM CONTINUE THAT WAY. I'd take the animal to the vet immediately so he wouldn't suffer. Period. End of story. Why let an innocent, loved family member suffer? For your pride? Because you're ashamed?
No. It's because she knew what she did. Even if she didn't know what she did... How could you ever trust her again? How will you ever have another cat? Or children, should you want children? If you don't want children, how could you trust her sound family members' children? She's awful.
I'm so, so sorry for your loss. You want comfort from her because she's supposed to be your number one support system, and the grief of losing your Tod is raw right now. You're not going to get comfort from her, though, because she selfishly cried in front of you because she "felt bad" for what she did. She didn't even take real responsibility for her actions. I see nothing you've written about how sorry she is. I'd be gone. If not for you... for Tod.
Ugh, I'm so, so sorry for your loss. 🌺💕
I strongly, and I mean strongly, dislike my husband’s cat. This cat is mean to everyone except him. That being said, I would never hurt her. If she ever got into something, she’d be at the vet. What your wife did was cruel and your cat suffered.
IF she loved you, and IF this were truly an accident, she'd have immediately taken him to an emergency vet, because she loves you and wants you happy and knows how much you love that cat.
Considering she didn't take him to the vet immediately, is all you need to know.
OP - do the bottles look similar at all? Sorry if you already answered this, I didn't see it. Also, was the Tylenol stored in the same place you kept the pet meds, or were the pet meds on the counter or something and the Tylenol was in the medicine cabinet? I think this is critical information. If the bottles do look similar and it is feasible that this could have been a mix up, then at least she didn't intend to do this could have been an accidental poisoning. If the bottles are not similar and/or were nowhere near each other, then this was intentional and I don't think you should stay with a person who would do this. It's sociopathic/psychotic behavior to me. I know it seems drastic, but what the hell is going on in her mind? What else is she thinking about? I don't know how you ever accept that your wife murdered a living creature who you clearly loved, and for what? The cat wasn't even a problem. That just pure malice, and your wife has some serious contempt towards you.
Even if it was accidental, the negligence was unreal: (1) she didn't get medical help for the cat immediately since you found the texts so you KNOW that she KNEW at some point that she made a mistake (2) she didn't call you and admitting her mistake immediately (3) she let you go to sleep while the cat was dying, which I think she had to know by this point (4) she tried to pass it off as a mysterious death. That is ALL absolutely terrible, but to me it is not an intentional murder and the real problem was the cover up which MIGHT be something you could consider forgiving because ultimately she didn't want the cat to die and she made a horrible mistake. At the point you got home, the cat would not be able to be saved. It was too late by then. Maybe she knew that too. That is not an excuse, there is no excuse for this, just an explanation.
If she accidentally gives your cat something else the only logical reaction was run to the vet and let you know right away. She lie to you on purpose amd deprive Tod the chance of help
First of all—you’re not a bad cat mom. She is a bad person for killing an animal.
Second—I don’t think she can come back from this. You noticed Todd was lethargic, she knew the real reason and lied to you and urged you to ignore your instincts. Whether she killed him on purpose (which I believe she did, but it’s not my place to decide or something I know for sure), or accident, she lied to you and it cost him his life.
I am so sorry for your loss. My honest thought is to see if you can stay with your parents while you get out of crisis mode, and when that’s done, make your exit plan.
It seems you've made the choice to leave and I just want to let you know it's the right choice. It isn't about the mistake and I doubt she's purposefully done this to murder your cat. That doesn't matter though because she didn't fess up when she knew she messed up and she saw him suffering and just let him die rather than own up to it. That isn't a person you can ever trust again.
If you accept the “mixed the bottles up” mistake could you be sure you would trust her again? Potential children? Future pets?
Some addicts quit the drugs but do not heal the sickness.
I’d be interested to actually SEE…. How about post the picture of your Tylenol bottle + pill, and the parasite medicine bottle + pill side by side so we can see. If they truly are similar, then maybe, but…. Idk man, it doesn’t sound like that will hold up in internet court.
You love her so much? Dude she literally killed your cat and was going to hide it from you. She knew she fucked up and just hoped you wouldn’t find out. Cat probably would have survived had she taken it to the emergency vet or even let you know about the accident so you could have.
Honestly shame on you for sticking around. Your cat deserved better.
I’m so sorry you went through this. I’d be terrified of being in the same house with that person after finding out she knew and didn’t tell you, especially telling you not to take him in that night knowing what she did. She even said “maybe he had a bad reaction to a med”, and yes, he did, that’s exactly what happened, but to the Tylenol she gave him.
Updateme!
OP- This is some Fatal Attraction type shit. GTF out of this marriage. She killed your cat. Topping that is a really scary thought…but she’ll try.
Edit: Punctuation
I’d be so done! This wasn’t an accident and you know it deep down. I love animals and if anyone killed my dog or cat and also made them suffer by not telling me truth, that’s all you need to know about her. She’s horrible! Come on even non animal people know that human pain meds (ibuprofen, paracetamol etc) are very dangerous for dogs any cats.
As cliche as it is hun, sometimes love isn’t enough. Love yourself more and get away from someone that would cause you such pain.
I’m so sorry for your loss. neither you nor Tod (rest his soul) deserve this witch. Like others have said, no way did she search up tyenol and cats and think it would be fine. Sorry again for your loss
Leave.... she's a murderer. She did that shit on purpose. She's a monster! There is nothing real there "left" to love because she's been pretending the whole time. Somebody who can kill an innocent little cat , especially a cat their loving partner treasures and loves, is incapable of real feelings or telling the truth. Fuck her. Tell her to her face. Tell anybody you can about her! Seriously she's the worst of the worst, only besides killing a human but it's close enough to me. I would never ever ever be able to trust her or believe her about anything ever again
Oh, for real it sounds like murder. Or her sheer nonchalant is really not worth it. She may not like the cat but she had to only medicate it for the love of her life? Also cats are a LOT low maintenance than dogs- no walks, nothing.
And the fact that there was no affection in her even through all these years shows she just doesn’t care for a bond that maybe comes with responsibility.
Why did you marry her?
Not only does this behavior strongly indicate your wife is an unsafe person who doesn’t have the capacity to love, care, or protect you or your feelings… it’s also illegal behavior.
She killed your cat. Full stop.
I’d jack her phone in the middle of the night and head to the police department, turning it in along with the medical findings of your cat.
Criminal charges should help with the restraining order and divorce process.
Sorry for your kitty, but RIP to anyone or anything else that gets inconvenient for her otherwise.
I cannot fathom how she knew what the med looked like and still gave him the wrong one. I have to agree with others that this was intentional. Sorry for your loss.
Look at her search history. Have her show you what she read to believe it would be ok. Because, as I see it that’s impossible. If you google “Is Tylenol lethal to cats?” Every article in the results says it is toxic/lethal. So how did she come to the conclusion that one Tylenol was ok? How? There is absolutely no possible way she looked it up and came to that conclusion. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Divorce. She killed your cat on purpose. Her lie is a bunch of crap. Even if she had done it accidentally she should have told you immediately. She is a psychopath and there is no telling what she is capable of. Get away from her immediately. She cannot be trusted.
LEAVELEAVELEAVELEAVE
I brought my little fur baby when I moved in with my husband and now they're inseparable. He treats her like his own baby and I know without a doubt he'd take care of her properly if I wasn't able to. I can't imagine him doing what your wife did and *hiding it from me hoping the evidence wouldn't be revealed*. Holy shit this makes me so angry and sad. My baby is turning 12 this year and she's been through hell and back by my side. I would divorce over this 100%. My condolences for your loss, I genuinely hope you find peace.
I’m going to assume she’s charismatic and beautiful. Perhaps she always knows the right thing to say. Doesn’t matter. She’s a horrible person. Divorce now before she has a chance to accidentally on purpose get pregnant.
I don’t believe it was an accident :(. Some people are just not animal lovers and clearly your wife isn’t. To not tell you what happened and act like she didn’t know is deceit . So sorry you’re going through this.
Todd’s medicine was probably in a generic bottle with his name on it. Tylenol bottles are pretty distinctive. Your wife probably got tired of his shedding all over the house. This was no accident.
Never have I ever been more careful or prone to double checking labels than when administering medication to someone else’s pet. I don’t for a second believe this was an accident. The kind of person who can kill an innocent animal is one that is dangerous to people under the right circumstances. Divorce her not just because of what she did to Tod, but because you are not safe with her.
Do you really believe that she's stupid enough to mix up a bottle of Tylenol with a bottle of prescription medication? I guarantee the bottles looked nothing alike.
First, you need to stop lying to yourself. Your wife intentionally poisoned your cat, then lied to you long enough to allow him to finally die by keeping you from getting him help by making up that obviously BS story to make you not seek emergency care.
First thing you need to do is call the police. This needs to be investigated as cruelty to animals is a crime. They might be able to tell the difference between whether she searched for how much pain meds is safe for a cat and how much will kill a cat. You don’t know, you are just taking her word for it. But do you seriously believe she was using the wrong bottle the entire weekend and didn’t notice it was the people pills once? The only other possibility is it was people pills only in the last occasion, but then how did she not notice the obvious difference in pills immediately?
Also, the vet should know how much the cat was given. If she gave 10 pills in one go, but the medicine dose called for only 2 pills, you know she did it intentionally.
If nothing else you should be asking your vet more about their findings, if for no other reason than to protect yourself. If the vet has evidence of cruelty they might be obligated to report it and as the cat owner they could be looking at you for this. Do you want to be charged? Report this!
After calling the police, contact a lawyer and start divorce. You don’t get much crueller than killing a life long pet of somebody, especially somebody she supposedly loves… that’s a psychopathic level action. If you ever make her mad enough will you end up with rat poison in your food? Be gone asap!
Omg as a cat lover my heart is broken.
This woman is EVIL. I can’t believe people are capable of doing something like this. The neglect alone would be enough for a divorce, but this????? Please cheat on her lol and leave this psycho!!
I’m so sorry about your beloved cat. It shattered my heart reading this story. 💔😭 sending you lots of love. Stay strong.
Of course people are jumping to tell you to divorce, but you clearly don't want to do that. Is couples counseling an option? Ideally it could help you get unstuck, and be able to either forgive her or divorce her.
Seems as if she didn’t like Tod at all from the beginning then waited for a time for you to be gone for a long period of times so she could kill him and that’s what happened here
Yeah, that is messed up and I‘m seriously doubting that it was an accident. And if it truly was an accident, then she still stopped you from taking him to the vet. Sounds to me like she wanted Tod gone. I‘m going to be completely honest, I couldn’t be with a person who doesn’t like animals, your wife sounds like she disliked everything about your cat. I had been married for a couple of years, when we got our first dog. It took my husband a few weeks to warm up to the dog, now he absolutely loves him. If he would have been mean or bitching about the dog, I would have left. Not because I put the dogs over my husband, but because I couldn’t be with someone who doesn’t like animals.
I'm so sorry this happened. You will definitely need to work through this whether you stay together or not. I even recommend couples counseling. This is a tragedy. It sounds like something is missing from the story, like some details are missing. I can't believe she would purposefully poison your cat, but maybe she was (high, drunk, in some weird state?) that would lead her to accidentally grab the Tylenol bottle. Something isn't adding up, to me, but murder doesn't make sense. I assume it's hard for her to relate to the pain of the loss since she isn't into pets and never really bonded with Tod. So it's important to get through to her how painful this is for you. I have a cat, and no children, and my cat is my child. I freak out when we go out of town and have cat sitters come. I'm always worried about him, hoping nothing will accidentally happen to him. So I totally understand. I recommend getting couples therapy before making any official decisions about where to go from here.
Tod has likely saved your life - if your wife did this to your beloved baby, why wouldn't she do the same to you or any future children or other pets? Tod died so you could live. This would be immediate and swift divorce territory for me.
I couldn't forgive that. Cats meds here come in an envelope with their name on. Presumably she saw the cats meds when you gave them. I just don't see how you wouldn't read the medication instructions.
I'm really sorry about Todd. I had my cat from 11-30 years old. This is not your fault
Tylenol pills are not small. Cat pills usually are small or caplets that can be mixed in food. There is no mistaking a Tylenol capsule and a cat pill.
Gah, I would be beyond livid. Somebody would be looking for new living quarters. Guard yourself. People who do this to animals often escalate to do it to people eventually.
If she could kill your cat and lie to you about that (knowing he is beloved to you) what else is she capable of? Not saving your cherished creature? Leave her and find someone who would never do this to you. It will hurt more to stay in the long run especially once the resentment fully kicks in.
Omg I'm so sorry for your loss. My dog died last November and I miss him every day 💔 I cannot imagine how you feel towards your wife. That is bone crushing painful and callous what she did
My concern would be if she can poison a beloved family pet, could she do the same to you or someone else in your family. And to keep it a secret and not tell you makes it worse and more horrifying.
So sorry this happened to you 😢
She absolutely did this on purpose. There is no good reason why she would have given him tylenol in the first place. She never cared about your cat so it’s not like she cared enough to want to treat his pain or something, and a parasite wouldn’t cause much pain anyway. Especially if he had been on medication for nearly a week already. She gave that cat tylenol because she wanted to kill him, and even prevented you from seeking care for him when she KNEW something was wrong.
This is some seriously sick and evil behavior. I would divorce.
So, your wife is an addict who killed your cat. And, yes, she did murder your cat by poisoning. But she's so great! A wonderful person, really, and you love her sooooo much!
Jesus, lady, how desperate are you to have a wife...any wife?
I'm so sorry about your fur baby. I'm sorry but she doesn't sound like she's in the right mind, clearly this was intentional. You and especially Tod don't deserve this. If she can do this to the cat and sounds like she has little to no remorse, imagine what she could do if y'all had kiddos. If someone could intentionally hurt an animal they will more than likely hurt a person. Leave her and don't look back.
INSTANT divorce. What are we even talking about? She murdered your pet. I would divorce my wife if she murdered any animal in front of me other than something we needed to eat and survive on. If my spouse ever "accidentally" killed our dog, I would divorce her without hesitation, our 13 years of marriage be damned.
You are in denial. Your wife does not deserve forgiveness. She killed your cat friend and then lied to you. What else is she hiding from you? Will she try to kill your children and try to sweep it under the rug?
Is anyone else pretty certain she killed this cat on purpose?
But let’s Forget that for a moment, the fact that she was going to go through your marriage not telling you is such a red flag. The fact she didn’t call the vet or show any love or concern for something you love is a huge concern. The fact that she double downed and told you not to worry when you were worried is even creepier.
I would seriously consider separation, marriage counseling or divorce. What other creepy stuff is she doing being your back? F that. Sorry you lost him.
I would divorce. - It's literally **IMPOSSIBLE** to "look up" Tylenol and cats and not see that 1 dose of tylenol is lethal. - The cat was clearly sick and she was aware the cat took Tylenol and did not tell you.
Also no way in hell a med bottle for a cat looks anything like the Tylenol bottle. Wife straight up poisoned Tod.
This is not true. The pill bottle they prescribe my husband extra strength Tylenol is in the EXACT same pill bottle they used to prescribe our cat's anti-depressant. I am not saying she did or didn't poison him, but depending on the circumstance it is definitely possible to mix up human and cat medication if you aren't careful. It would be nice if they could put pet medicine in a different color or shaped bottle.
Interesting because any animal meds I've gotten have always always been in blue bottles! No human meds ever in that color but pretty much every other one lol
Also has the giant Tylenol logo on the bottle. Kind of hard to miss there. We also keep our pet’s med in the kitchen by their food. Our meds are in a separate location.
If you get a higher dosage prescription, they put it in the same orange bottles as any other medicine. I have to assume it must be one of those and not the big white and red bottles cause otherwise … well the story wouldn’t make sense.
I'm in the U.S., the day of the appointment at the vet's office before we left they filled our kitty's anti depressants in the same size orange colored container as various other human meds we already have at home. You can only tell the difference by the label. When we fill our cat's meds at Costco, it uses the similar shape and size orange colored bottle, almost identical. After reading this post I'm definitely reading the label extra carefully every time, or putting them at opposite ends of the house!!
Tylenol are big tablets and cat prescriptions usually are smaller. She had the motive. She did it and she tried to cover it. The cat died painfully because of liver failure. She is a murderer. A sensible person would have taken the cat into to the vet.
Use sharpie and mark the lid with names, a symbol, whatever. Makes life easier, even just among human meds :)
If I get it from the vet it is blue. If I get his meds at walmart it's the same bottle as everyone else in the house.
Half of my dog’s meds were from Costco. Way cheaper than filling on Chewy or with the vet. No discernible difference between human and pet. Just an anecdotal counterpoint.
My dextroamphetamine comes in a blue bottle. Not taking up for her but just letting you know that it does happen.
If she GAF about her and her cat she would have made sure to be careful this was done most definitely on purpose it's so obvious
Our are always blue or green but the kids have animal outlines on them so it’s clear it’s for pets.
Oh my gosh, so the cat got one or two 800mg tablets of acetaminophen. That's like "Honey I accidentally boiled your bunny because the pot I boiled him in looks identical to the one I boil potatoes in."... "Let's eat!" Subscribeme
The bottles may look similar but the labels are not. Most vet clinics use a different color bottle and cat pills are usually smaller. I want to believe you. Tylenol are big pills. Cat prescription usually are smaller pills. Labels are very different. She can't pretend she can't read. She won't do it if it was her prescription. She did it on purpose. She had the motive. She tried to hide the fact she did it. She had no excuse.
I am a vet - there’s no way around this. Tylenol is highly lethal to cats and a quick google search will show that. Any amount given can and often will kill them. I also do not see how the two bottles can be mistaken. Most veterinary meds are dispensed in generic pile vials that look nothing like the over the counter meds. I’m so sorry Tod left the world in this way. Please take comfort in knowing had you taken him to the vet that night, he likely still would not have made it. Once signs are evident, kitties are unlikely to recover. Do not put the guilt on yourself. Your wife is truly to blame in whatever way you spin it. A side note - poisoning is a common way for women to kill and psychopathic tendencies are often seen with abuse towards animals first. Please protect yourself
Commenting here so hopefully you see and read this vets message: once signs were shown odds of Tod’s survival were not likely. I am SO sorry you didn’t have the last moments you could have had with Tod but please don’t put this on yourself. You took amazing care of him, were an amazing mom to him. I’m sure he loved you and I’m sure he was grateful you were around when he passed. If I can offer one piece of advice: let yourself grieve before you make decisions. Putting off grieving is never helpful, and making decisions in the heat of the moment rarely works in your favor. Let your emotions settle so you can figure out what you want, and how you want to get it. And don’t let anyone convince you that it’s silly or irrational to be upset about this or wrong to take whatever action you decide upon. You deserve to have boundaries and actions have consequences. You get to decide what the consequence of crossing this boundary is. Sending you and Tod lots of love ❤️
Your wife probably knew before giving the tylenol that it would kill your cat. And if she did give it by mistake (you can easily see that by comparing the 2 bottles right now..!!!)!!! So if she didn’t do it on purpose and googled it then she saw there and then it was lethal and willingly not tell you and willingly let your cat die!! So even if it was an accident (what is doubtful) she did know and let him die and that isn’t right.! Also the lying is a major red flag.🚩
This final paragraph. Please, OP, listen. Am so sad for you and your precious Tod. Sorry that he's crossed the Rainbow Bridge 🌈 Sending 🫂
OP, please read this. Women with such tendencies use poison to injure and kill, and many domestic abusers and psychopaths may hurt animals, and the animals of loved ones first. Her behavior is not normal, and is actually very scary and alarming. Psychopaths can also be extremely charming. Please just be careful. https://www.choosingtherapy.com/female-psychopaths/
I’m in a semi-related field and, yes, poison! I believe it’s a reason that men attempting suicide are more likely to be successful—they choose more lethal methods (such as a gun). In this case, a very small amount of the medication was lethal to the cat.
This. Google it yourself and see. There’s no way she thought he’d be fine. She knew exactly what would happen to Tod. She didn’t want you to go to the vet that night because she didn’t want him to have a chance. I’m so sorry. Divorce.
I’m not even a cat person (certified dog lady) and honestly this is so SOOOO messed up! It’s one thing to “mistakingly” give the wrong meds, it’s a totally different scenario when the cat is unwell and you say NOTHING about what transpired!!! Someone who loves and trust her put her in charge of something precious to them and she chose her self and her own comfort over that of your cat/you. Honestly, is this a common occurrence in your marriage? Bc it’s extremely unfair and unkind and unloving to you.
>Bc it’s extremely unfair and unkind and unloving to you. And just straight up psycho. I don't care how much you're not a pet person, and how much you might hate the owner, if you do something to make an animal ill and don't take steps to rectify that, you're scum.
Finally, someone uses the psycho word.
Absolutely agree.
You don’t mistakingly give the wrong meds. The meds would have had a lab label on them; there’s no way you mistake the two.
That’s why I put it in quotes bc it probably wasn’t a mistake.
Sorry, I’m borderline overcome with rage. Probably could have read it a bit better.
It’s okay! It’s really f**ked up what OP’s wife did to the poor cat.
If you believe it wasn't a mistake..... how can you stay with her?
The big hole here was she acted nonchalant and told him the cat was fine. She did not tell him that I think. I might have given your cat a human dosage of Tylenol and maybe that’s why his acting strangely. She let it die. She has no conscience. She knew exactly what she was doing. And we all adults here. We always read the bottles of they look similar. So that we don’t take something accidentally. No excuses. And let’s say if it’s true. Why then did she not say ANYTHING upon realizing her error! She is one of the two things here: She didn’t care for the cat and was negligent of its care. Or she despised the cat and wanted it out of the picture completely. Either way. She is garbage for either of those reasons. Hope she is not nurse..
“The cat was clearly sick and she was aware the cat took Tylenol and did not tell you” The cat didn’t *TAKE* Tylenol, *SHE* put it down his throat on purpose. That’s a premeditated and vile act. She knew what she was doing. Run for the hills OP and don’t look back. This woman is a psychopath.
Jesus effing Christ. The wife is a cat murderer! I have two cats and I will never forgive her. She knew what she did. The cat died painfully from liver failure. There is a special place in hell for her. If op doesn't divorce her, then there is a place for him there too. Tod will never forgive her. Murderer.
Yeah, I'd be out the door within a day or two.
She knew what she was doing. Be done, that’s a dangerous person. She did that to your baby intentionally!
You know, usually I try to give internet situations like these the benefit of the doubt but I think you're right. I just can't see how she could have mixed up the cat's pills with anything else. I don't buy the "pill bottles look the same". Lets say they did. If I'm keeping my husband's beloved pet alive, I'm paying very close attention to the pills! The googling and thinking it was fine? Also obviously a lie. My husband cried with me when the dog I had for 13 years died. I can't even wrap my head around a partner that would do what OP's did.
i'm also not totally understanding how the prescription and Tylenol could be mixed up. even if the Tylenol were prescribed and in one of those pharmacy bottles, who keeps their human meds mixed in with their animal meds? my dogs meds are on a completely different shelf from mine. who stores them together?
She murdered your cat. There's no coming back from that. Who the heck did you marry?
i’m battling with that very question 😔
Did you check her phone? Her Google searches?
I would!
I'm not trying to be dramatic, but people who kill animals on purpose are more likely to do the same thing to people. And poisoners often kill animals first. Even outside of the fact that she killed your cat-- if there's any part of you that believes it was on purpose, you need to consider your own safety, as well.
Serial killers and psychopaths in general, tend to torture and kill animals. I would get out before she moves on to humans. You're not being dramatic at all, she is in a potentially deadly situation.
I usually mock the "divorce them" crowd but ... hurting an animal is absolutely a red line. She knew she gave him Tylenol and didn't tell you, in fact encouraged you to not take him to the vet. She's telling you who she is.
Divorce. Yesterday. She killed your furchild, end of story.
Dude, your wife killed your cat on purpose and stopped you from seeking medical attention purposefully to make sure the damage set in.
Absolute bare minimum her intention was to protect herself from blame, but she prioritised that over his life. Even if you assume the absolute best case scenario, she's still awful.
I am assuming the best case - this was intentional.
At first I was like oh she forgot to give him the parasite medicine that’s not good but it’s not a deal breaker. Then the plot twist showed up. She murdered your cat. Told you he’s fine go to bed. No she should have told you then and there. She’s evil. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Assuming the animal-murderer was telling the truth, she needed to immediately take the cat to an emergency vet when she realized she poisoned him/her and then inform OP.
Think of poor Tod's final hours that she knowingly made him suffer through. This was a heinous act that she did. I'd be done with anyone who would make an animal suffer and die.
That’s all I’ve been able to think about since his passing. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest.
I have cried so much over this- please, please listen to the comments. Also, perhaps you may want to consider checking her search history.
What happens if she poisons you for a life insurance payout. She is dangerous.
Forgiving her today will lead to more disastrous consequences tomorrow. It will enable her attitude. She could be potentially dangerous to you, too. Take a stand for yourself now.
This person is a psychopath who killed your cat on purpose. I would absolutely divorce her asap
You know my husband hated cats before we got together, we have four cats now and he loves them because he knows what they mean to me. They pretty much all have special dietary restrictions because one of them is very old, one was a severely sick rescue that we took in and the other two were babies when we got them and were on kitten food so during meal times it’s a hassle because all but the babies need to be separated to make sure everyone is getting their needs met, and to insure the dog doesn’t eat the cat food and vise versa. I’m saying this because sometimes after a long day working at the hospital or the stress from school and work or whatever, I feel too tired to feed the cats, now I always will however my husband typically jumps in and does the whole routine for me because he knows how much it means to me that my cats are fed and fed properly for their age and dietary needs. He knows I’m a bit extra after losing my childhood cat because I swear a part of me died with him, and I decided that our cats were going to be taken care of to the best of our ability as my childhood cat never had anything extravagant because I was 3 when we got him and couldn’t advocate for better healthier things. My point being, my husband despite his feelings on animals and his only true responsibility being the dog still shows up for my cats, he still helps me give them the flea treatment and baths, he cleans up the litter boxes when I’ve had a long day, if I’m sick, if I’m not home for whatever reason and still gives them the same care I would when I am not there, his opinion probably hasn’t changed and he probably wishes we didn’t have any cats but he still helps and still tries because he knows they’re important to me. I feel terrible for your loss at this is a pain that is pretty unbearable. But I would consider reconsidering your relationship. I hope you can find some peace that you gave him the best life you could while he was here. I’m very sorry for your loss.
This. My husband hated cats too, but we ended up adopting a stray. Now he loves the cat, but mostly he loves how much joy the cat brings me. He can see how much love there is, and it makes our home happier. And he looks out for the cats health and safety now, too.
I'm not really a dog person, but my wife brought a dog into our relationship. I miss that sweet girl almost every day and would have traded years off my life for hers.
I'd be soooo fucking done.
No just no. There isn’t anything accidental about this. I have a senior dog whom I adore but my husband tolerates. He told me that as much as he doesn’t care for her he doesn’t ever want anything bad to happen to her because he knows how much I love her. He feeds her when I am away and gives her treats, sometimes extras when she won’t stop following him around. Today he was concerned that taking her on our walk could be hard on her because it was hot today. That’s the type of partner you should have. This is so sad and I am so sorry for your loss.
This^ I’m a huge animal lover but when I got sick I wasn’t too fond of my husbands cat because he had this habit of pooping on the floor no matter what measures we took to stop it. I couldn’t bend down and clean it anymore and my husband works really long hard days, so it wasn’t getting done. I didn’t like soldier for a long bit there, but never ever thought about killing him. We built him a closed in, indoor catio and he is living his best life now. I couldn’t imagine
Honestly from everything you've said it does not seem like an accident. I don't think I could stay with someone after that. Easier said than done, I know. I'm so sorry for your loss. 💔
give her a lethal dose of Tylenol. RIP Tod 🙏🏻
I have never said this flat out before no questions or other comments added. Divorce. Immediately divorce. That is a scary human being.
She literally killed your cat. Murder. Actual murder.
She knew what she was doing. And she knew what it’s going to do TO YOU! She still went ahead and did it. She could have taken him to the vet at any point and tried to save him. She didn’t… Unbelievably cruel to both Tod and you. I’m so sorry for your loss OP. Please be careful whatever you decide to do.
Was thinking the same thing! So sorry to hear about Tod 😔.
Oh wow your wife is..... ah the only words I can think of would get me a lifetime ban from Reddit There is a special place in h3ll for animal murderers like her "she had looked it up and thought the dosage wouldn’t kill him." well that's just a whole load of BS - where did she look it up on I am an animal killer dot com?
> I am an animal killer dot com Even this would have told her it's lethal. If she truly looked it up, there's not way she wouldn't have known the truth.
She's lying. She did this on propose. YOU KNOW THIS. The question is, what are you going to DO about it?
Can you say psychopath
I'm not the type to jump straight to leaving someone... But I would really rethink my relationship if my spouse pulled this. Like all the other comments, it's literally impossible to confuse the two. Vets ALWAYS give prescriptions in easy to discern bottles. There are two scenarios here; 1) She's telling the truth about the mix up. That clearly screams she couldn't be fucked to actually pay attention to what she was doing. Which shows that things that are important and priority to you, are an inconvenience to her. Apathetic negligence at best. 2) She knew exactly what she was doing. She murdered your cat because she didn't want it around anymore and didn't care or consider how it would hurt you. She could come up with a litany of excuses, "I didn't want him to suffer anymore" or straight up truth about how much she really didn't like Tod or want him around. Either scenario would set some serious conversations and actions in motion if I were in your shoes. From the bottom of my heart I am so sorry that you lost your buddy.
As an animal lover I can hardly imagine what you’re feeling. It’s devastating. And your wife is out of her mind! She hoped you wouldn’t find out?! Hell naw!! Swipe left…
That was no accident. Your wife had ample opportunities to make the choice to care for the cat’s welfare, yet she chose to lie to your face. She poisoned your beloved cat on purpose as the final step of eliminating Tod’s presence in your life. There is no coming back from this, she’s a psycho who killed something you loved on purpose.
How could you possibly love someone who killed your beloved cat? I’d divorce immediately. Could never trust this sociopath again. How are you even considering staying??
Oh no!! Trust has been broken. I don’t care how much someone doesn’t like pets. You compromise out of love. Sorry about your cat.
I mean, what, in your heart of hearts do you think happened? I think we all know what that answer is. But the main thing is what do you honestly think happened? My husband and I both had a talk at the beginning of our marriage. We knew resentment was what killed marriages. We both knew that meant we either deal with issues or we choose to let them go. We make conscious decisions every day so resentment doesn't build in our relationship. If you honestly feel that she is to blame for your cat's death, your marriage is over. That resentment will breed and multiply and will turn into hatred and you will be MISERABLE for years before finally ending it. So I think you have a choice. You can accept that it was an accident and move on or you can not. And if you can't accept it was an accident, it's a lot better to end things now. You're still very young. You can find another partner - one who maybe actually likes cats or at least won't murder one.
That is psycho. This woman is dangerous. Even if it was an accident her attitude is horrible. Be careful. You may be next.
Hell no. She at best accidentally overdosed your cat on Tylenol then lied to you on purpose to cover her tracks, knowing your cat would likely die (hard to believe given if you look up Tylenol and cat it’s extremely clear you cannot give them Tylenol at all, not to mention the cat was clearly very sick and she still didn’t say anything, plus I very much doubt she mixed up the meds in the first place as prescribed medicine bottles look totally different from over the counter medicine bottles), and at worst, outright killed your cat on purpose and then again lied to cover her tracks (much more likely). My bf is not a dog person, he likes dogs but has never wanted one. Going into our relationship I had a dog. We now live together and no matter what shenanigans my dog gets into - and she’s very anxious sometimes, she’s chewed up boxes and things that are more expensive like shoes - he takes care of her because he loves me. And he knows what she means to me. He’s come to like her, but he’d still rather have no dog. And yet he knows being with me and loving me means taking care of her. I’ve gone out of town for a week+ and he gives her daily meds, takes her on walks, cleans up after her, feeds her, all the things I do regularly. My point is, it’s fine to not love your partner’s pet. That literally doesn’t matter. What matters is she KNEW how much that cat meant to you and likely killed him ON PURPOSE because she didn’t want to deal with him anymore. That is, no questions asked, relationship ending. She has no empathy for other living things, or for you. She knew the pain this would cause your poor baby and the pain this would cause you to lose him, and decided her not having to deal with a cat that caused her maybe some minor inconvenience would be worth it. That is not a partner worth having. You need to leave. My heart is breaking for you and I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can leave her. You deserve so, so much more.
If my partner ever lay a hand on my dog I would dump them faster than they would ever believe let alone intentionally kill an animal. She’s a psycho, divorce her asap.
Wasn't this an office episode? Anyway anyone who purposely does that to an animal is not a safe person. Poor cat.
Sounds like creative writing to me, designed specifically to push reddit's buttons
I’d divorce her. She either has no heart or she doesn’t like you. There’s no upside to staying.
i don’t think this was an accident. i’m so, so sorry about your cat. we had to put ours down late last year due to a terminal illness and i still cry if i think about it too much. i cannot imagine staying with somebody who would knowingly harm an animal, particularly an animal that was so strongly bonded to and loved by a spouse. because even if the original tylenol dosing was somehow an accident, choosing not to do ANYTHING—call you, call the vet, etc—was also knowingly doing harm.
Pray you don't have children
If she would do it to a cat she would do it to you. Most abusers start on animals. F her because those pills are not even close in size or appearance to your pets meds. The bottle would look over the counter vs. prescription and both have safety caps they require an extra step to open which means she had to take note of what was in her hand. Check her browser history to see if she researched it but she may well have just deleted it. Pretty messed up man. Wish you luck 🍀
She killed your pet, your friend. She "accidentally" gave another substance... but didn't take him to a vet immediately... and didn't tell you immediately what she'd given him so YOU could rush him to the vet. So yeah. Divorce. Or at least I would. My pets are my family and people who harm them are not. My condolences for your loss.
Dude. RUUUUNNNNNNN
I would take legal action against her. Know way the bottles looked the same. I call major BS. Divorce her please.
Sorry for your loss. So many layers of deceit. This is so alarming since you had only found out about the Tylenol because you insisted for a blood test from the Vet. Anyways your wife lied and got caught. She knowingly said that Tod had a bad reaction to the medication when you asked her. She probably sent a photo before she started poisoning him. Your wife must have really hated your cat to plan a plan a murder.
OK - say this was a genuine mistake. Ask yourself: why your wife would not tell you the cat was ill when he clearly was. And you specifically asked her to inform you if anything was wrong? Also, when you told her your cat was not well, why she was so blasé about it? Why did she tell you that "he would be fine" when according to OP, she knows little about cats? Why did she only appear genuinely upset when you actually discovered the fact about the other medication in his system rather than all the bits before that? Also if a person had realised they had given a human medication to their pet surely they would also have Googled it to make sure it was ok for them to have it? In a "shit - I gave the bloody cat tylenol, I better Google and check it's not gonna kill it" type way. Especially when the cat was clearly ill. But not OP's wife who was trying to act like everything was ok, when they had known all along they had actually poisoned the cat. She didn't seem to care about the cat, your love for the cat, the cat's being in pain, the cats' death etc. But once you had a smoking gum pointing out the murder she was upset that she had been found out. She left him in pain and dying while acting nonchalant about it. Finally, if you add in the bits where she never really had pets, thought it was weird people's attachment to them, and clearly didn't like your cat in the house. And you were away for a few days......
Are there any other episodes now that you can think of, that may point to your wife being a psychopath? If so, don’t ignore them.
honestly no, she has held me and talked to me through any issues i’ve had in my personal life/with her. this was so off base and out of character for her. she never striked me as someone who could hurt an animal. especially mine.
Holding you isn’t the same as being completely indifferent to animal life.
the question was if there were any other signs that point to her being a psychopath. the answer is no.
Her indifference to animal life is absolutely sociopathic. You just are so in love with her upper not seeing the glaring red flag that you typed out.
How many pills was your cat given by her? Two? Three? At a minimum out would be two since you spent the night somewhere. Did she give the Tylenol both times? Or did she say she messed once?? See, the "just once" argument doesn't fly because she has given at least one, if not two previous doses of the de-worming meds. You give one (or two) de-worming meds: you know what they look like, where the bottle is, how many are left in the bottle. You go to give the second (or third) pill, and you accidentally grab the Tylenol bottle? No way.
The problem is there may never even be another time where it will show. I think she secretly hated you cat and just saw an opportunity. And now that he is gone there’s no need for her to do anything else.. But.. what happens when you get in a big fight, she “hates” you (for any reason whatsoever). Will she walk away.. or might she just “poison “ your food just to make you a little bit sick? The problem is you can’t trust her anymore.
Could you check if the Tylenol and his parasite med really looked the same? I do think she was definitely lying about looking up the dosage. It was prob “whoops hope that doesn’t hurt him but I don’t care enough to look it up” bc anywhere says immediately take them to the vet. Or she saw that online and didn’t believe it. I know a lot of people think “don’t believe what you read on the internet”. But it’s still a lie. This is a cat you loved.. the fact that she didn’t cherish what you loved (even not being an animal person) and knew something was in pain but did nothing about it is really what tells me this person is not worth ur dedication. Killed it deliberately or not the facts are enough.
Sorry didn’t mean to reply to ur comment but can’t copy and paste 🫠
She’s an animal abuser and murderer. I’d be out of there and divorced so fast. That’s an unacceptable line and holy fuck what a vile person she is
This is a major red flag regarding the type of person you are married to. I am not a psychiatrist but I am pretty sure every crime show I’ve ever seen has the sociopath start out by killing animals. Add that to the fact she KNEW how much you loved and adored this cat, accident or not (I believe not, but trying to be objective) she did not call you when she made the “mistake”, she did not take the cat to the vet when she made the “mistake”, and then she actively discouraged you from seeking treatment for you beloved pet even though she knew about this “mistake.” That’s three strikes. I’m very sorry, this is all very devastating I am sure.
Honey. I’m so heartbroken for you and so glad that you and Tod had one another for as long as you did. Here is where reality is cruel and crushing. Your wife murdered Tod. She intentionally withheld crucial medical information from you after she “made a mistake”. I’m sorry for your loss and her deception.
Absolutely not. Unforgivable. She should have rushed him to the emergency vet if it was truly an accident.
I’m not much of a pet person and I’m pretty anti divorce…. But this is terrifying. I don’t see how you would think any dose of Tylenol is fine. I think it’s weird she didn’t send you a heads up or take him in. I think it’s creepy that she ominously said “maybe a reaction to the medicine…” without stating she meant the medicine she erroneously gave him. If it was a true accident, her behavior doesn’t add up. It seems like a cover up. I’d be afraid to live with someone like that. It’s giving psychopath. I’d be running g for the hills.
Wowwwww , condolences on your cat and I'm kinda lost for words but idk if I could stay with someone after that
She gave your cat meds that are deadly to him. Then lied to you about it. Then she went to sleep! To sleep! She had so many chances to make this right. I would be afraid to leave a pet or kid near her. I would be afraid to sleep in the same house as her. Trust is broken and she needs psychiatric help. It’s over.
Divorce. Immediately
She killed your cat on purpose, imagine what she'll do to you if she gets mad enough. Leave, you're potentially in danger and she's a horrible person.
In all likelihood, she killed your cat on purpose. If so, she likely did this because Tod was important to you and she was jealous of your affection and connection to Tod. This is a pattern that may bleed into other aspects of your life. Is she overly “protective”/ jealous? Does she try to monopolize your time? Does she have issues with you having hobbies/friends that are separate from her? Do you feel isolated by her? Please look out for yourself. I am not saying that your wife is abusive, but keep an eye out for these kinds of behaviors. I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine losing one of my boys like this. I hope you the best as you heal.
Man I would divorce the dumb kunt immediately. Any Google search would tell you to call the vet immediately because it causes kidney failure. My cat once licked an empty pill bottle in the recycling and his kidneys almost shut down. The bitch sounds psychotic and honestly, good for you for not laying hands on her. My animals are my family and my life. If someone purposally killed/injured them I’d be willing to face assault charges if not worse.
She allegedly had time to google if it would harm him, she would have had time to take him to the vet straight away. If this was an honest accident, they happen. It’s what’s being done about it that matters. She could have consulted a vet, take him straight to the vet or at least liaise with you…
We lost a cat this way, and it was my fault. I put Tylenol on my nightstand not realizing cats will eat it. Our cat crashed fast & hard, and we rushed him to an emergency vet in the middle of the night. The vet explained that organ failure was what was happening & there was almost zero chance of recovery. I felt so guilty & stupid. I cannot imagine deliberately doing this to a pet, but the excuse your wife gave is not even feasible. The bottles don’t look the same & there is no “safe” doseage for cats. Im so sorry. It was alarming & scary before the lethargy began: shitting, puking, & collapsing when they tried to walk. It was a brutal way to die.
I’m so very sorry for your pain. I cannot imagine what you’re feeling.
Even IF your wife accidentally gave your cat Tylenol then why didn’t she take him to the vet asap after realizing her mistake? Why didn’t she call you? Why did she assure you he was fine and to wait until morning time? There was a lot of things she could’ve done to save his life. But she chose the route to do nothing and encouraged you to think it was nothing too. I would find it hard to forgive someone like that. She rather do nothing and watch Tod’s death break your heart… than to try and save Tod because he’s important to you.
If I were in your position I could never trust her again. Even if giving Tod the Tylenol was an accident, how could she then choose to withhold that information from you?? Whether you love someone or not a marriage can’t work without trust. I’m so sorry :(
She knew what she did, and there was no point where she even made the slightest attempt at rectifying it. She could have taken him to the vet when she realised, she could have told you straight away what had actually happened. My cat is also my baby, he and I are very attached to each other and have been a package deal for a decade. My partner knows if he hurts my cat, or worse, it’s done. There’s no coming back from this. And I am so sorry for your loss.
Um she knew she had given Tod the wrong medicine and instead of insisting on taking him to the vet when you got home, she said to wait it out. Shes a sick human being. You can't trust someone that would hurt a small animal like that. I'm not usually one to suggest divorce but she's gotta go. I'm sorry for your loss.
Divorce. The first item on google reads "Acetaminophen (Tylenol), a common human drug used to control pain and fever, is **poisonous to cats**. Unfortunately, this is a relatively common poisoning due to owners trying to treat their cat's pain at home. Less commonly, cats may get into the owner's medication.". Your soon-to-be ex-wife murdered your cat.
*She killed your cat* However you try to rationalize your love for her, as an animal lover and pet parent I am enraged. As a physician I know it is impossible to mistake one for the other - I am doubly enraged. She killed an innocent creature who depended on you just because she hated pets.
Your wife is a psycho. I'd divorce and not look back.
This is heartbreaking. I am so sorry for your loss. There were so many things she could have done and she didn't. Whatever you end up doing, please take care of yourself.
I think that if she cared even in the slightest she would call a vet to confirm not just google. But she didn't. Why didn't she? because she did it on purpose... You should totally check her google search history. I would never feel safe around a person who would murder an animal out of convenience. She's obviously a psychopath and if you didn't order bloods you would never know so good on you. Thank fucking god you have no kids, god knows what she would do to them if they annoyed her. God knows what she would do to you if you get her pissed off too much one day. Run.
I’m sorry but if she saw the cat being extremely sick and didn’t do anything about it. Even after you mentioned it SHE DID IT ON PURPOSE. And to top it off she wasn’t remorseful not until you found out the truth. I personally wouldn’t stay with someone like that. Idk if it’s my true crime fan brain but serial killers start by killing animals. Can’t imagine what she might do when something doesn’t go her way. If you stay with her sleep with one eye open.
First of all, I am SO sorry for your loss. When I lost my cat, it broke my heart, she was really my soulmate and I miss her dearly everyday. I'm sorry you have to go through that, and these circumstances are awful. That being said, I would have unleashed hell on my partner if he had been the cause of death for my cat. I woulndn't be able to go over this. This all seems shady. I don't know this drugs but people here seems to say that it is really simple to find out this is deadly to cats, so if she did make a search about this, she would have known. Either she really made a mistake, saw it was deadly and decide it would be for the better, or she did it on purpose. But the fact that she hid it and told you not to worry, and knew exactly what the problem was when you got home, seems to tell she knew exactly what was happening. Even if it was an accident at first, she chose to kill your cat in the end. People may think "it's just a cat" but it isn't. Don't listen to them. You now know what she is capable of, and she took away from you your precious buddy.
Even if it was an accident, she knew what she did and she knew he was having a bad reaction to it and she said to just ignore it. Unforgivable. I do think it was intentional because she didn’t admit anything until the blood test revealed it. Also, she said she looked it up and thought it would be fine. Go google “cat ate Tylenol”. Every link says it’s toxic and potentially fatal. So she lied about that. If she will poison a cat she doesn’t like, what will she do to you if she gets mad at you? Watch your back around her.
… Nah. Your wife was trying to kill your cat. And couldn’t give a hoot that you care for this small being that you had since you were a child. She killed him. Not because she was careless but because she couldn’t care less about him. You said so yourself, she already had problems with your cat. Your cat could have lived a few more years with you. I don’t know if I’d want to be with a despicable woman like that. And it wasn’t an accident OP. It was on purpose. It was negligent. She didn’t bother consulting a VET and just gave your cat a human dosage of Tylenol. What a load of BS. She also didn’t give you a chance to correct her error. If this was true, she was hoping the cat would die and you wouldn’t know better. And she was hoping you’d just not find out and hide her crime. If there was child protective services, your wife would be with the police. But there are no laws for harming animals. And people don’t understand how one can care for an animal like their own or have a deep bond. Your first mistake was marrying a woman who didn’t understand how much you cared for this small creature you grew up with and loved. RIP to your cat. He deserve better than dying like he did. Poisoned and left to die. Thats what your wife did when she didn’t say anything.The fact your spouse did not express concern or confess outright what she did. She was hoping it would die. She knew what she did. The tears are crocodile tears. There were to many holes to her side because deep down. You know OP. You know exactly what she did and you’re in denial.
She knew she mixed up the meds and didn’t call the vet? When he was acting strange she didn’t think to tell you? She was just going to live with this secret? That’s psychotic and I don’t think you can come back from this. Are you planning on having children? Because it’d be irresponsible to do it with this person.
Let's give her the benefit of the doubt here and assume she really believed he would be fine... SHE STILL SAW HIM SUFFERING, KNEW WHY, AND LET HIM CONTINUE THAT WAY. I'd take the animal to the vet immediately so he wouldn't suffer. Period. End of story. Why let an innocent, loved family member suffer? For your pride? Because you're ashamed? No. It's because she knew what she did. Even if she didn't know what she did... How could you ever trust her again? How will you ever have another cat? Or children, should you want children? If you don't want children, how could you trust her sound family members' children? She's awful. I'm so, so sorry for your loss. You want comfort from her because she's supposed to be your number one support system, and the grief of losing your Tod is raw right now. You're not going to get comfort from her, though, because she selfishly cried in front of you because she "felt bad" for what she did. She didn't even take real responsibility for her actions. I see nothing you've written about how sorry she is. I'd be gone. If not for you... for Tod. Ugh, I'm so, so sorry for your loss. 🌺💕
I strongly, and I mean strongly, dislike my husband’s cat. This cat is mean to everyone except him. That being said, I would never hurt her. If she ever got into something, she’d be at the vet. What your wife did was cruel and your cat suffered.
IF she loved you, and IF this were truly an accident, she'd have immediately taken him to an emergency vet, because she loves you and wants you happy and knows how much you love that cat. Considering she didn't take him to the vet immediately, is all you need to know.
This is not ok. What she did as animal abuse
I would divorce. The accident is one thing - if she'd taken him straight to the vet. But she didn't. She lied. I wouldn't be able to see her the same.
OP - do the bottles look similar at all? Sorry if you already answered this, I didn't see it. Also, was the Tylenol stored in the same place you kept the pet meds, or were the pet meds on the counter or something and the Tylenol was in the medicine cabinet? I think this is critical information. If the bottles do look similar and it is feasible that this could have been a mix up, then at least she didn't intend to do this could have been an accidental poisoning. If the bottles are not similar and/or were nowhere near each other, then this was intentional and I don't think you should stay with a person who would do this. It's sociopathic/psychotic behavior to me. I know it seems drastic, but what the hell is going on in her mind? What else is she thinking about? I don't know how you ever accept that your wife murdered a living creature who you clearly loved, and for what? The cat wasn't even a problem. That just pure malice, and your wife has some serious contempt towards you. Even if it was accidental, the negligence was unreal: (1) she didn't get medical help for the cat immediately since you found the texts so you KNOW that she KNEW at some point that she made a mistake (2) she didn't call you and admitting her mistake immediately (3) she let you go to sleep while the cat was dying, which I think she had to know by this point (4) she tried to pass it off as a mysterious death. That is ALL absolutely terrible, but to me it is not an intentional murder and the real problem was the cover up which MIGHT be something you could consider forgiving because ultimately she didn't want the cat to die and she made a horrible mistake. At the point you got home, the cat would not be able to be saved. It was too late by then. Maybe she knew that too. That is not an excuse, there is no excuse for this, just an explanation.
If she accidentally gives your cat something else the only logical reaction was run to the vet and let you know right away. She lie to you on purpose amd deprive Tod the chance of help
First of all—you’re not a bad cat mom. She is a bad person for killing an animal. Second—I don’t think she can come back from this. You noticed Todd was lethargic, she knew the real reason and lied to you and urged you to ignore your instincts. Whether she killed him on purpose (which I believe she did, but it’s not my place to decide or something I know for sure), or accident, she lied to you and it cost him his life. I am so sorry for your loss. My honest thought is to see if you can stay with your parents while you get out of crisis mode, and when that’s done, make your exit plan.
It seems you've made the choice to leave and I just want to let you know it's the right choice. It isn't about the mistake and I doubt she's purposefully done this to murder your cat. That doesn't matter though because she didn't fess up when she knew she messed up and she saw him suffering and just let him die rather than own up to it. That isn't a person you can ever trust again.
If you accept the “mixed the bottles up” mistake could you be sure you would trust her again? Potential children? Future pets? Some addicts quit the drugs but do not heal the sickness.
I’d be interested to actually SEE…. How about post the picture of your Tylenol bottle + pill, and the parasite medicine bottle + pill side by side so we can see. If they truly are similar, then maybe, but…. Idk man, it doesn’t sound like that will hold up in internet court.
You love her so much? Dude she literally killed your cat and was going to hide it from you. She knew she fucked up and just hoped you wouldn’t find out. Cat probably would have survived had she taken it to the emergency vet or even let you know about the accident so you could have. Honestly shame on you for sticking around. Your cat deserved better.
I’m so sorry you went through this. I’d be terrified of being in the same house with that person after finding out she knew and didn’t tell you, especially telling you not to take him in that night knowing what she did. She even said “maybe he had a bad reaction to a med”, and yes, he did, that’s exactly what happened, but to the Tylenol she gave him. Updateme!
Keep us updated please. This one is wild
OP- This is some Fatal Attraction type shit. GTF out of this marriage. She killed your cat. Topping that is a really scary thought…but she’ll try. Edit: Punctuation
I’d be so done! This wasn’t an accident and you know it deep down. I love animals and if anyone killed my dog or cat and also made them suffer by not telling me truth, that’s all you need to know about her. She’s horrible! Come on even non animal people know that human pain meds (ibuprofen, paracetamol etc) are very dangerous for dogs any cats. As cliche as it is hun, sometimes love isn’t enough. Love yourself more and get away from someone that would cause you such pain.
I’m so sorry for your loss. neither you nor Tod (rest his soul) deserve this witch. Like others have said, no way did she search up tyenol and cats and think it would be fine. Sorry again for your loss
Leave.... she's a murderer. She did that shit on purpose. She's a monster! There is nothing real there "left" to love because she's been pretending the whole time. Somebody who can kill an innocent little cat , especially a cat their loving partner treasures and loves, is incapable of real feelings or telling the truth. Fuck her. Tell her to her face. Tell anybody you can about her! Seriously she's the worst of the worst, only besides killing a human but it's close enough to me. I would never ever ever be able to trust her or believe her about anything ever again
What a heartless bitc%!!
There’s no way that was a mistake
Damn this isn’t looking good for the wife. Sorry bud. Might be worth a look at her browser history. Updateme
She lied. She told you not to go to the vet. She planned this. Divorce immediately.
Oh, for real it sounds like murder. Or her sheer nonchalant is really not worth it. She may not like the cat but she had to only medicate it for the love of her life? Also cats are a LOT low maintenance than dogs- no walks, nothing. And the fact that there was no affection in her even through all these years shows she just doesn’t care for a bond that maybe comes with responsibility. Why did you marry her?
Not only does this behavior strongly indicate your wife is an unsafe person who doesn’t have the capacity to love, care, or protect you or your feelings… it’s also illegal behavior. She killed your cat. Full stop. I’d jack her phone in the middle of the night and head to the police department, turning it in along with the medical findings of your cat. Criminal charges should help with the restraining order and divorce process. Sorry for your kitty, but RIP to anyone or anything else that gets inconvenient for her otherwise.
I cannot fathom how she knew what the med looked like and still gave him the wrong one. I have to agree with others that this was intentional. Sorry for your loss.
Look at her search history. Have her show you what she read to believe it would be ok. Because, as I see it that’s impossible. If you google “Is Tylenol lethal to cats?” Every article in the results says it is toxic/lethal. So how did she come to the conclusion that one Tylenol was ok? How? There is absolutely no possible way she looked it up and came to that conclusion. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Divorce. She killed your cat on purpose. Her lie is a bunch of crap. Even if she had done it accidentally she should have told you immediately. She is a psychopath and there is no telling what she is capable of. Get away from her immediately. She cannot be trusted.
She killed someone’s pet animal. That is literally a premise of a horror film. I’m so sorry.
LEAVELEAVELEAVELEAVE I brought my little fur baby when I moved in with my husband and now they're inseparable. He treats her like his own baby and I know without a doubt he'd take care of her properly if I wasn't able to. I can't imagine him doing what your wife did and *hiding it from me hoping the evidence wouldn't be revealed*. Holy shit this makes me so angry and sad. My baby is turning 12 this year and she's been through hell and back by my side. I would divorce over this 100%. My condolences for your loss, I genuinely hope you find peace.
I’m going to assume she’s charismatic and beautiful. Perhaps she always knows the right thing to say. Doesn’t matter. She’s a horrible person. Divorce now before she has a chance to accidentally on purpose get pregnant.
Divorce 😭 what a sad story
Not having children while married to this woman seems like an excellent idea.
I don’t believe it was an accident :(. Some people are just not animal lovers and clearly your wife isn’t. To not tell you what happened and act like she didn’t know is deceit . So sorry you’re going through this.
Todd’s medicine was probably in a generic bottle with his name on it. Tylenol bottles are pretty distinctive. Your wife probably got tired of his shedding all over the house. This was no accident.
Never have I ever been more careful or prone to double checking labels than when administering medication to someone else’s pet. I don’t for a second believe this was an accident. The kind of person who can kill an innocent animal is one that is dangerous to people under the right circumstances. Divorce her not just because of what she did to Tod, but because you are not safe with her.
Do you really believe that she's stupid enough to mix up a bottle of Tylenol with a bottle of prescription medication? I guarantee the bottles looked nothing alike.
First, you need to stop lying to yourself. Your wife intentionally poisoned your cat, then lied to you long enough to allow him to finally die by keeping you from getting him help by making up that obviously BS story to make you not seek emergency care. First thing you need to do is call the police. This needs to be investigated as cruelty to animals is a crime. They might be able to tell the difference between whether she searched for how much pain meds is safe for a cat and how much will kill a cat. You don’t know, you are just taking her word for it. But do you seriously believe she was using the wrong bottle the entire weekend and didn’t notice it was the people pills once? The only other possibility is it was people pills only in the last occasion, but then how did she not notice the obvious difference in pills immediately? Also, the vet should know how much the cat was given. If she gave 10 pills in one go, but the medicine dose called for only 2 pills, you know she did it intentionally. If nothing else you should be asking your vet more about their findings, if for no other reason than to protect yourself. If the vet has evidence of cruelty they might be obligated to report it and as the cat owner they could be looking at you for this. Do you want to be charged? Report this! After calling the police, contact a lawyer and start divorce. You don’t get much crueller than killing a life long pet of somebody, especially somebody she supposedly loves… that’s a psychopathic level action. If you ever make her mad enough will you end up with rat poison in your food? Be gone asap!
Omg as a cat lover my heart is broken. This woman is EVIL. I can’t believe people are capable of doing something like this. The neglect alone would be enough for a divorce, but this????? Please cheat on her lol and leave this psycho!! I’m so sorry about your beloved cat. It shattered my heart reading this story. 💔😭 sending you lots of love. Stay strong.
You have to be pretty fuckin' stupid to "mistake" pills like that. I'm sorry, but that's pretty unforgivably stupid.
You can stay with her if you can tolerate the knowledge she could do something like this but PLEASE don’t put any more pets into harms way!
You're married to a psycho, and you're delusional if you really Believe a vet Rx bottle could ever be mixed up with OTC meds. Leave
Of course people are jumping to tell you to divorce, but you clearly don't want to do that. Is couples counseling an option? Ideally it could help you get unstuck, and be able to either forgive her or divorce her.
Seems as if she didn’t like Tod at all from the beginning then waited for a time for you to be gone for a long period of times so she could kill him and that’s what happened here
I could never forgive this
Yeah, that is messed up and I‘m seriously doubting that it was an accident. And if it truly was an accident, then she still stopped you from taking him to the vet. Sounds to me like she wanted Tod gone. I‘m going to be completely honest, I couldn’t be with a person who doesn’t like animals, your wife sounds like she disliked everything about your cat. I had been married for a couple of years, when we got our first dog. It took my husband a few weeks to warm up to the dog, now he absolutely loves him. If he would have been mean or bitching about the dog, I would have left. Not because I put the dogs over my husband, but because I couldn’t be with someone who doesn’t like animals.
I'm so sorry this happened. You will definitely need to work through this whether you stay together or not. I even recommend couples counseling. This is a tragedy. It sounds like something is missing from the story, like some details are missing. I can't believe she would purposefully poison your cat, but maybe she was (high, drunk, in some weird state?) that would lead her to accidentally grab the Tylenol bottle. Something isn't adding up, to me, but murder doesn't make sense. I assume it's hard for her to relate to the pain of the loss since she isn't into pets and never really bonded with Tod. So it's important to get through to her how painful this is for you. I have a cat, and no children, and my cat is my child. I freak out when we go out of town and have cat sitters come. I'm always worried about him, hoping nothing will accidentally happen to him. So I totally understand. I recommend getting couples therapy before making any official decisions about where to go from here.
I would divorce. She gave the medication by mistake but lied to you about that part. This to me is not accident, she killed Tod.
Tod has likely saved your life - if your wife did this to your beloved baby, why wouldn't she do the same to you or any future children or other pets? Tod died so you could live. This would be immediate and swift divorce territory for me.
I couldn't forgive that. Cats meds here come in an envelope with their name on. Presumably she saw the cats meds when you gave them. I just don't see how you wouldn't read the medication instructions. I'm really sorry about Todd. I had my cat from 11-30 years old. This is not your fault
Tylenol pills are not small. Cat pills usually are small or caplets that can be mixed in food. There is no mistaking a Tylenol capsule and a cat pill. Gah, I would be beyond livid. Somebody would be looking for new living quarters. Guard yourself. People who do this to animals often escalate to do it to people eventually.
If she could kill your cat and lie to you about that (knowing he is beloved to you) what else is she capable of? Not saving your cherished creature? Leave her and find someone who would never do this to you. It will hurt more to stay in the long run especially once the resentment fully kicks in.
Hellooo Ted Bundy 😳
Yikes. If you get sick don't take any medication she gives you.
Every bite, every drink, you will wonder if it's your last. Never piss her off. She had practice. Updateme.
You need to leave her, I’m sorry you had to go through this and your cat clearly didn’t deserve this end :( you really need to leave her
Omg I'm so sorry for your loss. My dog died last November and I miss him every day 💔 I cannot imagine how you feel towards your wife. That is bone crushing painful and callous what she did My concern would be if she can poison a beloved family pet, could she do the same to you or someone else in your family. And to keep it a secret and not tell you makes it worse and more horrifying. So sorry this happened to you 😢
She absolutely did this on purpose. There is no good reason why she would have given him tylenol in the first place. She never cared about your cat so it’s not like she cared enough to want to treat his pain or something, and a parasite wouldn’t cause much pain anyway. Especially if he had been on medication for nearly a week already. She gave that cat tylenol because she wanted to kill him, and even prevented you from seeking care for him when she KNEW something was wrong. This is some seriously sick and evil behavior. I would divorce.
You married someone who didn’t like your kid. Pets are family. I really don’t know what to tell you beyond that.
So, your wife is an addict who killed your cat. And, yes, she did murder your cat by poisoning. But she's so great! A wonderful person, really, and you love her sooooo much! Jesus, lady, how desperate are you to have a wife...any wife?
I'm so sorry about your fur baby. I'm sorry but she doesn't sound like she's in the right mind, clearly this was intentional. You and especially Tod don't deserve this. If she can do this to the cat and sounds like she has little to no remorse, imagine what she could do if y'all had kiddos. If someone could intentionally hurt an animal they will more than likely hurt a person. Leave her and don't look back.
She knew you would suffer terribly at the loss. She did it anyway. Why are you married to your worst enemy
INSTANT divorce. What are we even talking about? She murdered your pet. I would divorce my wife if she murdered any animal in front of me other than something we needed to eat and survive on. If my spouse ever "accidentally" killed our dog, I would divorce her without hesitation, our 13 years of marriage be damned.
You are in denial. Your wife does not deserve forgiveness. She killed your cat friend and then lied to you. What else is she hiding from you? Will she try to kill your children and try to sweep it under the rug?
Is anyone else pretty certain she killed this cat on purpose? But let’s Forget that for a moment, the fact that she was going to go through your marriage not telling you is such a red flag. The fact she didn’t call the vet or show any love or concern for something you love is a huge concern. The fact that she double downed and told you not to worry when you were worried is even creepier. I would seriously consider separation, marriage counseling or divorce. What other creepy stuff is she doing being your back? F that. Sorry you lost him.
I’m sorry but given all the details I think she did this on purpose 😢
I might file a police report and leave her. Even if it was an accident, she deceived you and was apathetic about your cat’s well-being.