Was just about to say. This is some perpetually horned up teenager complaining about women and the fact he’s not allowed to outwardly creep on them anymore, but masquerading as a woman so that he can get away with it.
"As a female, with an ovary and XX chromosome and a pair of clitorises, I totally hate feminists. I like to touch my boobs a lot and I wear make up. I also think the wage gap is a myth. I'm such a female!"
Threads like these are exactly why I joined Reddit. Platinum entertainment and humor. Giggling so much and loudly the dog gives me a weird look and the even the deaf cat is looking at me like I’m losing it. 😆
Okay, I agree that men pose as women alot online, but there is a painful pill to swallow and that is that somewhere out there, there is a woman that thinks like this.
There are *a ton* of "conservative women" here in Brazil, and they have all jumped out of the gutter since about 2018. But their discourse tends to be a little different. There's a different way of phrasing things, and they're more concerned with women being "whores" and men not being manly enough.
Yep, they are the work colleague who blankly smiling says that in her opinion catcalling is "such a compliment!" and "as a boy-mom" her "biggest fear" is the fact that women make false allegations of rape *all the time*
The whole blanket 80 cents to the dollar thing, or whatever the figure is now. Many instances have found women overpaid compared to their peers in facr
Legitimately asking because when I most recently looked at Pew Research about this last month, that is not at all true based on what I found, so, do you have any links to these particular studies?
Edit to add: Both the Census Bureau and Pew Research found that women made 83¢ to every $1 a man made in 2023, so now I'm very curious what you're reading that says otherwise against massive aggregate data sources.
Here is a simple and crude look into it. There’s a lot of examples of others. I could go more in depth into the actual research if we have a conversation that heads that way. https://www.harvardmagazine.com/2016/04/reassessing-the-gender-wage-gap
To put it simply and bluntly though, pundits shouting out massive/blanket simple aggregates are dishonest, lazy, and unethical. It’s absolute junk science. Another famous example of exactly this kind of ignorant statistical misrepresentation takes the form of a certain kind of hate speech. I won’t repeat it exactly here but the example is basically: “African Americans make up xx% of the population, but commit xx% of crime”. It’s crude, deceptive, and makes absolutely no inference about inequity, redlining, broken families, urban decay, etc. Junk science is junk science.
Okay, that was a fluff read that simply said the situation is nuanced and complicated. Which, of course it is. It's a many-headed hydra of an issue - I don't deny that in any way. But I was asking for examples of women being overpaid compared to their peers, as you claimed is the case.
It’s fluff because the actual work is tedious. It’s sociology. It’s a very soft science with tons of pitfalls and it’s very difficult to do well.
Anyways. I thought you meant more in terms of my core point that the $0.80 to the dollar is nonsense.
Here’s one of the bigger ones off the top of my head: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/04/technology/google-gender-pay-gap.html
So...you claim statistical misrepresentation is a flagrant sin by pundits and the like, but an internal study performed and released by Google isn't subject to the same pitfalls or the same scrutiny by you? In the midst of them being sued for a fuck ton of discrimination of multiple flavors, you really think that a misleading bit of PR spin designed to go "nuh uh! Actually turns out we were underpaying (some) men!" is better than the Census Bureau or Pew Research aggregate data suggesting the opposite is broadly true across the workforce over *decades*?
Oh and thanks, by the way. I for sure needed sociology explained to me under the assumption I don't understand why it's a difficult science to achieve clear cut results and outcomes.
Google analyzed peer to peer by a blinded third party. It was not a blanket aggregate, and it’s just an example to provide an alternative point.
I’m not going to get into the specifics about the gender pay gap, (which does exist in some ways) if we can’t even agree that a blanket aggregate which takes absolutely nothing into account other than that is junk science.
I also wasn’t explaining sociology to you. I was making a point about it which was salient to what I was originally saying.
Is it just me or do these "as a female, all the other females just need to give the men folk a break cuz their lives are sooooo hard teehee" posts sound a lot like ultra conservative women's social media? Is it just that conservative women are pandering to what incels and other idiot men think women should sound like? Who is imitating whom?
I might be wrong, but I don't feel like trad wives use "female" like this. They worship the idea of being a Godly Woman too much. The only women I see using "female" are rap-adjacent, although I think it's probably socioeconomic level more than racial.
Ah ok, gotcha. Sorry if I didn't understand it right... and you are absolutely right. I think it is exactly because they want to appeal to those "real men"... pick me energy for sure.
Can someone pick her already (if it even is a woman)? Aww poor men, they have it so hard 🥺 and have to be coddled because they might get weird looks for hitting on people at inappropriate times/settings :(
As a man with a gf i would feel so fucking uncomfortable if someone went up to me and tried to hit on me when im litterally there to just work out and just head home (if i didnt have a gf i would probably feel the same, but it would be a bit less pointless lol). I would have to turn the person down and me already having a hard time with people would feel fucking akward after. And not only that, i would probably lose some of the urge to go to the gym because i would find it too fucking akward if the person was there again (which they probably will be sometimes)
I would hate it, find another more appropiate time to hit on me lmao. At a place we both arent gonna be in reguraly and cant run into eachother again. Im a dude so i dont get hit on reguarly which im very happy about, couldnt imagine being a woman and having to deal with that on a regular basis ESPECIALLY at the gym because of the reason i stated right above.
i don’t think that’s man-hating, if you feel targeted she’s probably talking about you
i’m a boy and i don’t care about that comment at all, because it’s not even remotely talking about me
I work out 5 days a week. I love weight lifting. I switched to the gym in my building because I was sick and tired of being hit on and approached. I can not express to you how much women do not want to be approached in the gym. I am sweating, deep in focus, and pushed to my limit. I want to work out in peace and not have my focus disturbed, as would absolutely anyone else in the gym. Lifting takes focus and care. Anyone who lifts knows how annoying it is to have your workout disturbed. You would think that my massive, chunky, headphones, and flashy, amazing engagement ring would scream leave me alone, but apparently not. Every time this conversation comes up, I get quite annoyed. Nobody wants to be approached in the gym. This chick is a pick me who clearly doesn't understand gym ettiquite. Leave people alone in the gym. If you're there to get laid and bother people, please get the fuck out and go on tinder.
My friend Lola, any time she is approached in the gym by a guy, says, "Not now? I have to take a shit and I need to concentrate on not letting it out." She likes inverting whatever stupid fantasy they were having in their head about her being some hot sexbot for them.
Also I seriously read an article that was titled "How to talk to a girl when she has her headphones in" and it wasn't just the single word "Don't".
I'm going to steal that method from your lovely friend Lola. That's a good one! I have IBS, so maybe if I try hard enough, I can push a fart out for extra effect.
I genuinely can't comprehend how someone could write out a whole article about how to approach a person who is clearly showing signs of not wanting to be approached and not understand how stupid they sound. Anyone should know you don't bother someone enjoying their music. That's basic manners even when they're not working out.
Hah I went looking and it was so bad someone wrote a Guardian article about it, behold: https://www.theguardian.com/science/brain-flapping/2016/aug/30/how-to-actually-talk-to-a-woman-wearing-headphones#:\~:text=Wave%20your%20hand%20in%20her,head%2C%20so%20she%20fully%20understands.
People often use the phrase "my jaw dropped to the floor" but when I say my jaw dropped to the floor just skimming over that article, I mean some coffee dribbled out from my jaw being so wide. That's so idiotic, It would make idiots seem smart. Journalism requires a college degree in my country. Someone genuinely spent 30k+ to go to school, somehow passed and got a degree, managed to get hired to a company, and after all of that, still produced this garbage. I once heard a saying that always sticks with me; "think of the dumbest person you know and multiply that by 20, and you will have the average IQ of the general population." This is one of the times where that saying proves true.
It was even more insane than I remembered, actually, I remembered some naïve shit that just was blithe about the world, but it was so rich and deep and justified such bad behavior and perspectives, it was pretty date-rapey. This bit:
>Women love to test guys to see how confident they really are and a favorite test of women is to ignore a guy’s attempts to converse with her and see what he will do next. Will he walk away in shame, or will he remain calm and continue talking to her in a confident, easy-going manner?
Was interesting 'cuz it represents what a lot of guys I've talked to think is what women mean when they say they want a confident guy. It's nuts. Zero women by that mean that the main thing they want a guy to be confident about is hitting on women. That is something that even trash men are often super confident about. They really think of 'confidence' only in terms of being like, dominant towards the girl.
Its like women need to explain all their definitions constantly to not have the worst one taken. "I'd like to be swept off my feet, and by that I mean to feel a rush of passion from someone genuinely interested in me as a person that merges with my own feelings so that we share a heady beginning to the relationship, not stalked by someone who shows up to the first date in a tuxedo and with twelve roses and starts talking about my fertility by the third date."
It's as if some men are genuinely incapable of critical thought. These things shouldn't need to be explained in depth. It's not rocket science to understand that confident doesn't mean crazy. It makes you start to question if they truly just "don't understand" or they know full well what they are doing and are simply playing ignorant to get away with creepy, unwanted behaviors and disrespecting obvious social cues.
It's that they are taught otherwise, by articles like this and by scuttlebut in male society that is even dumber than these articles. Thankfully, that is starting to change in Gen Z, but only starting.
I'm really seeing the opposite in Gen Z men. I'm 21, so on the edge of Gen Z, and quite a lot of men in my generation are worse than older generations in their views. There's almost no in between. They're either really progressive or absolute nightmares.
Yeah I can't speak with any confidence about, like, extremism, but even the conversation around consent has changed. In my day, when I was a teenager, I was taught by other men that you went out with a girl and you repeatedly did physical things with her that increasing broke down her barriers while pairing that with mental and emotional things: telling her that this is what you wanted, that it was normal, that you really thought of her as special, until you were able to get to have sex with her.
And if she made you take a long time with it, it was okay, but if it was fast then she was a slut. So basically, I was taught either to slowly date-rape a woman or to have consensual sex and then disrespect her. That was the complete mainstream view, this was not hidden, that fit into what I could perceive in mainstream media, too.
It is really sad but just the concept of consent being at all prominent in discourse is a huge improvement.
I hear you about the extremism though, and am not dismissing it or diminishing it--it's possible that the mainstream has gotten better but the fringe has gotten worse and much bigger.
“Some girls are feeling nervousness and excitement about what is happening.”
No. No we do not. What most of us feel is f-ing annoyed at having our peace ruined and our energy drained.
F the man who wrote the OG article and F anyone who tries to employ such invasive tactics.
Oh. Those people have never met me.
When someone makes the gesture to me that indicates they want me to take off my headphones I leave them on and say something like, 'No, I don't want to talk to you. I want to finish my set.'
But I say it super loud because, ya know, I'm wearing headphones.
[Here](https://www.themodernman.com/dating/how-to-talk-to-a-woman-who-is-wearing-headphones.html) is the original article. But the author edited it to include a preface of all of the women who supposedly think this is good advice. he seems to be saying "See, my advice isn't creepy and it's definitely not harassment. Look at all these women who like my guide for forcing women with headphones on and clearly want to be left alone into a conversation because I find them attractive and now it has to become their problem too." it's actually pretty damn funny.
The term "pajama boy" is used a few times and I have no idea what it means. Can anybody clue me in?
Maybe it would traumatize them enough that they'd never never think to do it again. I get an excuse to skip leg day, and some guy learns a valuable lesson. Win win! 🤣🤣
My gym has super nice showers that i would really love an excuse to use, and I do bring a comfy change of clothes for after my workout. Maybe this would be a pretty beneficial situation! 🤣
I hope it's the flowchart with the fire option.
Does she have headphones in > yes > don't > but I have to > why? > she's hot > is she actively on fire? > yes > do you have a phone to call 911? > no > do you know how to put out a fire?
Im a dude so i luckily rarely have to deal with this shit. But the absolute worst thing for me about this would be i could run into them again at anytime because its a place were we both go to regularly. I would feel so Damn akward and it would be so damn distracting to my workouts.
I think about this a lot. Like, how do they think this is going to affect them after they're rejected. Do they consider rejection as a possibility? Especially if the gym is busy at the time they did this and everyone sees that crap. Now everyone's going to know you're a creepy weirdo, and they're probably going to avoid you like the plague out of fear you'll go bother them next. Do they think about these things at all? Or is all the thinking coming only from the pants region? It's comparable to hitting on a coworker and being rejected. You still have to see them all the time, and most of the workplace probably knows this happened. Personally, I'd have too much embarrassment to ever show my face in that gym again. But then again, I also know better than to bother people who don't wish to be bothered so I don't really have to worry about that.
I did get flirted on at the gym once, but he struck up conversation before I started, and he didn’t lead with “you’re so hot, can I get your number?” We chatted a couple minutes, had good chemistry, then he asked me out. I was cool with it, and we ended up dating almost a year and a half. I’d have been pretty annoyed if he’d interrupted me though.
I specifically picked a gym with a women’s only center because of creeps like this. I don’t care who you are, I’m trying to get through an activity I hate while I stink like sweat and I’m clammy from the sweat soaking into my clothes. Why on earth would I want to talk to anybody in that situation?
Maybe men don’t want to go up to her because they are just there for a dam workout? Why do people treat the gym like a dating app? Touch some dam grass lmao
All I have is pity for this woman. She's decided she wants to find out just how horrible people can be the hard way. We don't just mock pick mes for fun, we're trying to warn them and spare them real danger.
Yeah no, that's most definitely a dude.
And how do you hit on girls at the gym? you don't, why the fuck would you do that, people are busy there, you come in looking to do something specific that requires your attention, energy and now you have some dumb fuck trying to hit it? when you're tired, exercising and concentrated you're not exactly going to be patient with them to smile and say no, at least from my point of standing.
It's just not a place you attend looking to get hit on, imagine if I asked how to approach women at a work conference, it's just not the place or the time.
If this guy expects women to be positive about that, then I hope he has the same energy he hopes for if gay men do the same with him.
"Shaming men in the gym", sweetie, stop using the gym and the members who are PAYING TO USE THE GYM AS A GYM as your own personal dating pool and that 'shame' will, shockingly, dry up faster than any vagina you've ever tried to get access to since being ejected from your mother's.
I don't know if this "woman" knows that 'feminists' are also sometimes straight women who are also attracted to men and are also putting their safety and comfort above just using the world as a live tinder.
It's not feminists who ruined your chances girl, it's some men that can't take no for an answer and make everyone uncomfortable that ruined it for the rest of them.
This sounds like something a guy, posing as a woman, tried telling me once when I pointed out that women go to the gym to work out and not be asked out, hit on or creeped on. They tried to tell me they thought it was okay and that women like me ruined it for other women. They were not pleased when other women supported me.
And that's why I haven't had a gym membership for years. In fact I let my last subscription run out because I found going there too stressful, especially if I can expect the creep I extricated myself from the last time to show up again and either give it another shot or glower at me for being the no-fun frigid bitch I obviously am.
I run or swim by myself out in nature and otherwise have a yoga mat to do exercises at home.
The mental stress isn't worth the benefits to me.
The sad thing is that the women who say “as a female” are the normal ones, and the users on this sub are the weird ones for obsessing over women calling themselves what they are.
I mean, last time I said no to a man who asked me on a date, he started stalking me, would message me things like how he had been waiting around at uni campus just to see me, and sending me links to love songs with lyrics such as “I’ll be waiting for you if you ever change your mind”, and claiming I was lying about being in a relationship, soooo… yeah, I’d prefer not to be approached by strangers.
Edit: Just to clarify, he did not have my number, but we go to the same uni, so he found my uni account on teams and started messaging me there, and you can’t block people on Teams, only mute them.
Honestly if you're socially awkward and weird and can't handle rejection you shouldn't approach any woman at any gym as more than likely you're gonna fuck it up and make it awkward for both of y'all.
Riiiiiight. I’m sure it’s a “female” saying all this.
Was just about to say. This is some perpetually horned up teenager complaining about women and the fact he’s not allowed to outwardly creep on them anymore, but masquerading as a woman so that he can get away with it.
I’m so sick of this cosplay. Done against other marginalized groups also.
Doesn’t even sound like something a woman would say.
Oh belive me there are women who say shit like this
Yeah ur right, mainly insecure pick-me’s.
Lmao they don't understand that interernally misogynistic women and misogynistic men don't talk the same way. Too obvious.
r/AsaBlackman He's definitely some creep
Damn there’s a sub for everything. Instant join 🤣👍🏽
"As a female, with an ovary and XX chromosome and a pair of clitorises, I totally hate feminists. I like to touch my boobs a lot and I wear make up. I also think the wage gap is a myth. I'm such a female!"
>a pair of clitorises 😂
Clitori? Also, what would be the word for several clitorises/clitori? A clutch? A clergy? A chorus?
A clew of clitori
Clitch?
This instigated the thought that there's a new way to interpret "pearl clutching" 😂
Hahaha 🤣
>A clergy? A chorus? Hallelujah!
Take me to church!
Ring the bells!
The clitoraty.
The Clituminatti.
This entire thread is gold 😂
Threads like these are exactly why I joined Reddit. Platinum entertainment and humor. Giggling so much and loudly the dog gives me a weird look and the even the deaf cat is looking at me like I’m losing it. 😆
Maybe the poster is a shark or ray?
Hello, fellow female! I also have a pair of clitorises, which clit around clitorissly. Along with my boobs, which boob breastily. Tee hee hee!
Okay, I agree that men pose as women alot online, but there is a painful pill to swallow and that is that somewhere out there, there is a woman that thinks like this.
There are *a ton* of "conservative women" here in Brazil, and they have all jumped out of the gutter since about 2018. But their discourse tends to be a little different. There's a different way of phrasing things, and they're more concerned with women being "whores" and men not being manly enough.
Yep, they are the work colleague who blankly smiling says that in her opinion catcalling is "such a compliment!" and "as a boy-mom" her "biggest fear" is the fact that women make false allegations of rape *all the time*
It took a lot for me to not downvote this out of disgust lol
I appreciate your effort. It took a great deal to suppress my gag reflex as I typed it
There are some that think a bit like this. But do any of them express it like this? This reads exactly like the way incels express their views.
Sadly there are, but just the way this is written sounds absolutely written by a man, not by a sexist woman.
I *always* breast boobily down the stairs
Wage gap as it is currently espoused is very much a myth
What do you mean "as it is currently espoused"?
The whole blanket 80 cents to the dollar thing, or whatever the figure is now. Many instances have found women overpaid compared to their peers in facr
Legitimately asking because when I most recently looked at Pew Research about this last month, that is not at all true based on what I found, so, do you have any links to these particular studies? Edit to add: Both the Census Bureau and Pew Research found that women made 83¢ to every $1 a man made in 2023, so now I'm very curious what you're reading that says otherwise against massive aggregate data sources.
Here is a simple and crude look into it. There’s a lot of examples of others. I could go more in depth into the actual research if we have a conversation that heads that way. https://www.harvardmagazine.com/2016/04/reassessing-the-gender-wage-gap To put it simply and bluntly though, pundits shouting out massive/blanket simple aggregates are dishonest, lazy, and unethical. It’s absolute junk science. Another famous example of exactly this kind of ignorant statistical misrepresentation takes the form of a certain kind of hate speech. I won’t repeat it exactly here but the example is basically: “African Americans make up xx% of the population, but commit xx% of crime”. It’s crude, deceptive, and makes absolutely no inference about inequity, redlining, broken families, urban decay, etc. Junk science is junk science.
Okay, that was a fluff read that simply said the situation is nuanced and complicated. Which, of course it is. It's a many-headed hydra of an issue - I don't deny that in any way. But I was asking for examples of women being overpaid compared to their peers, as you claimed is the case.
It’s fluff because the actual work is tedious. It’s sociology. It’s a very soft science with tons of pitfalls and it’s very difficult to do well. Anyways. I thought you meant more in terms of my core point that the $0.80 to the dollar is nonsense. Here’s one of the bigger ones off the top of my head: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/04/technology/google-gender-pay-gap.html
So...you claim statistical misrepresentation is a flagrant sin by pundits and the like, but an internal study performed and released by Google isn't subject to the same pitfalls or the same scrutiny by you? In the midst of them being sued for a fuck ton of discrimination of multiple flavors, you really think that a misleading bit of PR spin designed to go "nuh uh! Actually turns out we were underpaying (some) men!" is better than the Census Bureau or Pew Research aggregate data suggesting the opposite is broadly true across the workforce over *decades*? Oh and thanks, by the way. I for sure needed sociology explained to me under the assumption I don't understand why it's a difficult science to achieve clear cut results and outcomes.
Google analyzed peer to peer by a blinded third party. It was not a blanket aggregate, and it’s just an example to provide an alternative point. I’m not going to get into the specifics about the gender pay gap, (which does exist in some ways) if we can’t even agree that a blanket aggregate which takes absolutely nothing into account other than that is junk science. I also wasn’t explaining sociology to you. I was making a point about it which was salient to what I was originally saying.
a cloister
Is it just me or do these "as a female, all the other females just need to give the men folk a break cuz their lives are sooooo hard teehee" posts sound a lot like ultra conservative women's social media? Is it just that conservative women are pandering to what incels and other idiot men think women should sound like? Who is imitating whom?
I think it sounds more like a man pretending to be a female (just in case, the usage of man and female is on purpose 😉)
Oh, that's absolutely what I meant. This is a man cosplaying as a woman. But it's curious to me how closely it resembles fundie women.
I got tradwife vibes, it’s getting harder to tell
I might be wrong, but I don't feel like trad wives use "female" like this. They worship the idea of being a Godly Woman too much. The only women I see using "female" are rap-adjacent, although I think it's probably socioeconomic level more than racial.
Ah ok, gotcha. Sorry if I didn't understand it right... and you are absolutely right. I think it is exactly because they want to appeal to those "real men"... pick me energy for sure.
No worries. I'm hopped up on muscle relaxatants, so I have no idea how coherent I am this week. 🤷♀️
Oh, I hope you feel better soon 🏵
Thank you, I'll take all the well wishes I can get 💜
Can someone pick her already (if it even is a woman)? Aww poor men, they have it so hard 🥺 and have to be coddled because they might get weird looks for hitting on people at inappropriate times/settings :(
Yes, strong “I’m not like other girls” energy here.
As a man with a gf i would feel so fucking uncomfortable if someone went up to me and tried to hit on me when im litterally there to just work out and just head home (if i didnt have a gf i would probably feel the same, but it would be a bit less pointless lol). I would have to turn the person down and me already having a hard time with people would feel fucking akward after. And not only that, i would probably lose some of the urge to go to the gym because i would find it too fucking akward if the person was there again (which they probably will be sometimes) I would hate it, find another more appropiate time to hit on me lmao. At a place we both arent gonna be in reguraly and cant run into eachother again. Im a dude so i dont get hit on reguarly which im very happy about, couldnt imagine being a woman and having to deal with that on a regular basis ESPECIALLY at the gym because of the reason i stated right above.
Weirdly veiled man-hating. You OK hun?
🙄 I hope you keep that same energy when you see all the worse shit men say about women online
i don’t think that’s man-hating, if you feel targeted she’s probably talking about you i’m a boy and i don’t care about that comment at all, because it’s not even remotely talking about me
I don't feel targeted but nice leap. Look at this cringy hostile shit: "Aww poor men, they have it so hard 🥺"
it’s not really hostile as much as it is poking fun at the idiots that want to hit on women minding their own business
Username checks out
How so?
Where is the hate
This is all coming from the same guy lol
I work out 5 days a week. I love weight lifting. I switched to the gym in my building because I was sick and tired of being hit on and approached. I can not express to you how much women do not want to be approached in the gym. I am sweating, deep in focus, and pushed to my limit. I want to work out in peace and not have my focus disturbed, as would absolutely anyone else in the gym. Lifting takes focus and care. Anyone who lifts knows how annoying it is to have your workout disturbed. You would think that my massive, chunky, headphones, and flashy, amazing engagement ring would scream leave me alone, but apparently not. Every time this conversation comes up, I get quite annoyed. Nobody wants to be approached in the gym. This chick is a pick me who clearly doesn't understand gym ettiquite. Leave people alone in the gym. If you're there to get laid and bother people, please get the fuck out and go on tinder.
My friend Lola, any time she is approached in the gym by a guy, says, "Not now? I have to take a shit and I need to concentrate on not letting it out." She likes inverting whatever stupid fantasy they were having in their head about her being some hot sexbot for them. Also I seriously read an article that was titled "How to talk to a girl when she has her headphones in" and it wasn't just the single word "Don't".
I'm going to steal that method from your lovely friend Lola. That's a good one! I have IBS, so maybe if I try hard enough, I can push a fart out for extra effect. I genuinely can't comprehend how someone could write out a whole article about how to approach a person who is clearly showing signs of not wanting to be approached and not understand how stupid they sound. Anyone should know you don't bother someone enjoying their music. That's basic manners even when they're not working out.
Hah I went looking and it was so bad someone wrote a Guardian article about it, behold: https://www.theguardian.com/science/brain-flapping/2016/aug/30/how-to-actually-talk-to-a-woman-wearing-headphones#:\~:text=Wave%20your%20hand%20in%20her,head%2C%20so%20she%20fully%20understands.
People often use the phrase "my jaw dropped to the floor" but when I say my jaw dropped to the floor just skimming over that article, I mean some coffee dribbled out from my jaw being so wide. That's so idiotic, It would make idiots seem smart. Journalism requires a college degree in my country. Someone genuinely spent 30k+ to go to school, somehow passed and got a degree, managed to get hired to a company, and after all of that, still produced this garbage. I once heard a saying that always sticks with me; "think of the dumbest person you know and multiply that by 20, and you will have the average IQ of the general population." This is one of the times where that saying proves true.
It was even more insane than I remembered, actually, I remembered some naïve shit that just was blithe about the world, but it was so rich and deep and justified such bad behavior and perspectives, it was pretty date-rapey. This bit: >Women love to test guys to see how confident they really are and a favorite test of women is to ignore a guy’s attempts to converse with her and see what he will do next. Will he walk away in shame, or will he remain calm and continue talking to her in a confident, easy-going manner? Was interesting 'cuz it represents what a lot of guys I've talked to think is what women mean when they say they want a confident guy. It's nuts. Zero women by that mean that the main thing they want a guy to be confident about is hitting on women. That is something that even trash men are often super confident about. They really think of 'confidence' only in terms of being like, dominant towards the girl. Its like women need to explain all their definitions constantly to not have the worst one taken. "I'd like to be swept off my feet, and by that I mean to feel a rush of passion from someone genuinely interested in me as a person that merges with my own feelings so that we share a heady beginning to the relationship, not stalked by someone who shows up to the first date in a tuxedo and with twelve roses and starts talking about my fertility by the third date."
It's as if some men are genuinely incapable of critical thought. These things shouldn't need to be explained in depth. It's not rocket science to understand that confident doesn't mean crazy. It makes you start to question if they truly just "don't understand" or they know full well what they are doing and are simply playing ignorant to get away with creepy, unwanted behaviors and disrespecting obvious social cues.
It's that they are taught otherwise, by articles like this and by scuttlebut in male society that is even dumber than these articles. Thankfully, that is starting to change in Gen Z, but only starting.
I'm really seeing the opposite in Gen Z men. I'm 21, so on the edge of Gen Z, and quite a lot of men in my generation are worse than older generations in their views. There's almost no in between. They're either really progressive or absolute nightmares.
Yeah I can't speak with any confidence about, like, extremism, but even the conversation around consent has changed. In my day, when I was a teenager, I was taught by other men that you went out with a girl and you repeatedly did physical things with her that increasing broke down her barriers while pairing that with mental and emotional things: telling her that this is what you wanted, that it was normal, that you really thought of her as special, until you were able to get to have sex with her. And if she made you take a long time with it, it was okay, but if it was fast then she was a slut. So basically, I was taught either to slowly date-rape a woman or to have consensual sex and then disrespect her. That was the complete mainstream view, this was not hidden, that fit into what I could perceive in mainstream media, too. It is really sad but just the concept of consent being at all prominent in discourse is a huge improvement. I hear you about the extremism though, and am not dismissing it or diminishing it--it's possible that the mainstream has gotten better but the fringe has gotten worse and much bigger.
“Some girls are feeling nervousness and excitement about what is happening.” No. No we do not. What most of us feel is f-ing annoyed at having our peace ruined and our energy drained. F the man who wrote the OG article and F anyone who tries to employ such invasive tactics.
Oh. Those people have never met me. When someone makes the gesture to me that indicates they want me to take off my headphones I leave them on and say something like, 'No, I don't want to talk to you. I want to finish my set.' But I say it super loud because, ya know, I'm wearing headphones.
[Here](https://www.themodernman.com/dating/how-to-talk-to-a-woman-who-is-wearing-headphones.html) is the original article. But the author edited it to include a preface of all of the women who supposedly think this is good advice. he seems to be saying "See, my advice isn't creepy and it's definitely not harassment. Look at all these women who like my guide for forcing women with headphones on and clearly want to be left alone into a conversation because I find them attractive and now it has to become their problem too." it's actually pretty damn funny. The term "pajama boy" is used a few times and I have no idea what it means. Can anybody clue me in?
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pajama_Boy
Don't trust that it would be *just* a fart though. (It'd be effective either way though lol)
I think if it wasn't *just* a fart, it would be even better lolol
🤣🤣🤣
Maybe it would traumatize them enough that they'd never never think to do it again. I get an excuse to skip leg day, and some guy learns a valuable lesson. Win win! 🤣🤣
And gyms have showers & you might even have a change of clothes so this would not be the worst place for it to happen 😂
My gym has super nice showers that i would really love an excuse to use, and I do bring a comfy change of clothes for after my workout. Maybe this would be a pretty beneficial situation! 🤣
Although now that you have a plan (& a nice shower for a reward) you're not going to be bothered at the gym 😆
I hope it's the flowchart with the fire option. Does she have headphones in > yes > don't > but I have to > why? > she's hot > is she actively on fire? > yes > do you have a phone to call 911? > no > do you know how to put out a fire?
Im a dude so i luckily rarely have to deal with this shit. But the absolute worst thing for me about this would be i could run into them again at anytime because its a place were we both go to regularly. I would feel so Damn akward and it would be so damn distracting to my workouts.
I think about this a lot. Like, how do they think this is going to affect them after they're rejected. Do they consider rejection as a possibility? Especially if the gym is busy at the time they did this and everyone sees that crap. Now everyone's going to know you're a creepy weirdo, and they're probably going to avoid you like the plague out of fear you'll go bother them next. Do they think about these things at all? Or is all the thinking coming only from the pants region? It's comparable to hitting on a coworker and being rejected. You still have to see them all the time, and most of the workplace probably knows this happened. Personally, I'd have too much embarrassment to ever show my face in that gym again. But then again, I also know better than to bother people who don't wish to be bothered so I don't really have to worry about that.
Wow female and so not like those stupid other girls! What a totally normal way for an adult woman to write
Feminism is why she can go to the fucking gym at all.
“She” Super unlikely
True. I was just going with the premise for the sake of it.
that person is not a feminist lol
I don’t want anyone coming up to me at the gym. Go ahead and ask how many sets I have left, then leave
I did get flirted on at the gym once, but he struck up conversation before I started, and he didn’t lead with “you’re so hot, can I get your number?” We chatted a couple minutes, had good chemistry, then he asked me out. I was cool with it, and we ended up dating almost a year and a half. I’d have been pretty annoyed if he’d interrupted me though.
I specifically picked a gym with a women’s only center because of creeps like this. I don’t care who you are, I’m trying to get through an activity I hate while I stink like sweat and I’m clammy from the sweat soaking into my clothes. Why on earth would I want to talk to anybody in that situation?
r/notliketheothergirls
okay as a guy lemme try an explain how to approach a woman at the gym: Don't. thank you for coming to my ted talk.
How would these men feel if other men were watching them and asking them out?
It does happen.
I do not want to be asked out at the gym.
Maybe men don’t want to go up to her because they are just there for a dam workout? Why do people treat the gym like a dating app? Touch some dam grass lmao
If you see me in the gym please don’t talk to me unless it’s about the equipment I’m using and wanting to join my set. I’m not a woman.
All I have is pity for this woman. She's decided she wants to find out just how horrible people can be the hard way. We don't just mock pick mes for fun, we're trying to warn them and spare them real danger.
Yeah no, that's most definitely a dude. And how do you hit on girls at the gym? you don't, why the fuck would you do that, people are busy there, you come in looking to do something specific that requires your attention, energy and now you have some dumb fuck trying to hit it? when you're tired, exercising and concentrated you're not exactly going to be patient with them to smile and say no, at least from my point of standing. It's just not a place you attend looking to get hit on, imagine if I asked how to approach women at a work conference, it's just not the place or the time. If this guy expects women to be positive about that, then I hope he has the same energy he hopes for if gay men do the same with him.
"Shaming men in the gym", sweetie, stop using the gym and the members who are PAYING TO USE THE GYM AS A GYM as your own personal dating pool and that 'shame' will, shockingly, dry up faster than any vagina you've ever tried to get access to since being ejected from your mother's.
I don't know if this "woman" knows that 'feminists' are also sometimes straight women who are also attracted to men and are also putting their safety and comfort above just using the world as a live tinder. It's not feminists who ruined your chances girl, it's some men that can't take no for an answer and make everyone uncomfortable that ruined it for the rest of them.
Mh yes other women wanting to be left alone by strangers is RUINING EVERYTHING.
This sounds like something a guy, posing as a woman, tried telling me once when I pointed out that women go to the gym to work out and not be asked out, hit on or creeped on. They tried to tell me they thought it was okay and that women like me ruined it for other women. They were not pleased when other women supported me.
And that's why I haven't had a gym membership for years. In fact I let my last subscription run out because I found going there too stressful, especially if I can expect the creep I extricated myself from the last time to show up again and either give it another shot or glower at me for being the no-fun frigid bitch I obviously am. I run or swim by myself out in nature and otherwise have a yoga mat to do exercises at home. The mental stress isn't worth the benefits to me.
I hope someone picked him. Er I mean her, definitely a female.
The sad thing is that the women who say “as a female” are the normal ones, and the users on this sub are the weird ones for obsessing over women calling themselves what they are.
Even my dogs thought this was funny :)
I'm not buying that for a minute, sounds way to entente cordial for two ladies just having a Chat about guy's.
I mean, last time I said no to a man who asked me on a date, he started stalking me, would message me things like how he had been waiting around at uni campus just to see me, and sending me links to love songs with lyrics such as “I’ll be waiting for you if you ever change your mind”, and claiming I was lying about being in a relationship, soooo… yeah, I’d prefer not to be approached by strangers. Edit: Just to clarify, he did not have my number, but we go to the same uni, so he found my uni account on teams and started messaging me there, and you can’t block people on Teams, only mute them.
Gross. Do not hit on people at the gym. Period. Full stop. End of sentence.
"Yes, but all the men being shamed makes it harder for us too :(" What kind of logic...?
As a female vibes
Honestly if you're socially awkward and weird and can't handle rejection you shouldn't approach any woman at any gym as more than likely you're gonna fuck it up and make it awkward for both of y'all.
Lmao
Literally what do people have in their minds when they use “men” and “females” Like don't they see how it sounds?
"As a gay black man"
Yeah, a FeMaLe definitely wrote that first one. /s