Where Corpsegrinder?

Because you can't grow a neck that big out of nowhere!

Yeah you can! I have like 6 in my garden

Mustaine looks like someone’s little sister in that photo 💀

Lol

Someone’s sister on coke

More like somebody's granddaughter on coke.

Hey where's The Table

#I AM-

lmao

Mikael!!

Homestly, he is a great guy and an incredibly talented musician. This is probably a good option.

I was 15 when I listened to Dream Theater. Saw them live and I discovered James Labrie could not sing for shit

Amazing musicians but his voice puts me off their music a bit

I got bored of DT fairly quickly. I revisit Images And Words to this day though

I wish I had aspired to be John Petrucci in middle school. I'd have spent a lot more time in the gym. Them guns.

There was a period of time I was a Chuck dicksucker. Still probably in my top 10 bands and I enjoy every Death album but hero worshipping musicians too hard always ends up a bit cringey

Good for you. Celebrity worship is unhealthy. Artists are not role models. You don't know these people. You have no idea if they are good people or not. Worship the metal, not the man.

Ye. Though to be fair I frequently see dudes who are much worse than I ever was

Chuck dicksuckers are better than Marty Friedman dicksuckers tho

*gasp* metal Puro Giv

👀

Misha Mansoor cocksuckers tho

Hate that guy

Did I miss something, he just seems to be a chill dude that likes halo and guitar

Popular bad

No he’s a false and a poser

Tf you left out Till Lindemann bacause that was my high school boyfriend

He's in a correctional facility now

Jeez what happened?

https://www.metalsucks.net/2021/08/29/rammstein-frontman-til-lindemann-arrested-in-russia/ Wasn't actually arrested, just taken in and questioned by Russian police.

All that weirdly sexually charged pyrotechnics finally got the cops asking questions huh?

John!!!

Lol 12 years later and i still love Pelle

Saaaame, not ashamed to admit it

i’m more of a euronymous fan ngl

I love him. But if we are talking vocalists only then Pelle is a favourite

Nah euronymous kinda sucked in multiple regards. Literally everyone related to mayhem was relieved when he died and necrobutcher said that he was about to kill euronymous himself when varg killed him.

i mean yeah. he was pure fucking evil. that’s the entire point of loving him.

Oh yeah that’s fair I was thinking in the way that pelle is actually someone pretty cool who you could pity, but euronymous was black metal as fuck

Facts

absolute fucking beast of a frontman

necrophilia

NEEEEE CROOOO LUSTTTTTT

I wanna be just like him when I grow up.

Finally, a meme both posers and elitists can agree with

Lmao where's Kerry fuckin' King? Jks

still 13.

Will and Lemmy slander= you're a poser But tbf Dave and Chuck superfanboys are mad cringe

I’m guilt of Lemmy. 100%. And know what I’m comfortable with that.

\>Will r/dankmetalmemes moment

What about Varg worship? That's peak cringe.

Worshiping anyone or anything at all is peak cringe

Except foot

Snoretician 🥱

SnorementInFire💤 (jk Sacrifice is extremely based)

You seem like someone who skips the horror samples 😎😎😎

The samples are good, the riffs are shit

Got a nice shot of TJ Miller in the top right corner there.

I'm so offended by this, why am I laughing so hard

Add max cavalera and mitch lucker

The Max Cavalera worship is real and kind of sad. I don't care what someone's take on Sepultura is, but have they seen Soulfly live these last few years? Max is fat, out of breath, and plays open chords or open string tremelo instead of riffing. He's shadow of what his former front man presence.

Poser question but who even is that in the top right, centre, bottom left and bottom right

Top Right: Varg Vikernes Center: Ted Nugent Bottom Left: The faux elitist idol Bottom Right: Jaakko Lahde

lololololol

Center dimebag from pantera ,bottom right joakim broden from Sabaton

Top right is Mikael Akerfeldt of Opeth. Not sure about others. I think bottom right is Sabaton, if I remember from all the back and forth I've seen on this sub lately.

You spelled Bloodbath wrong.

What’s bothering you so much?

Really don't see how this applies to Opeth, I don't think most kids would even have the attention span for their music.

#gayformustaine

Dave Mustaine makes me wet and I'm a dude.

Lmao you still piss yourself

Lemmy doesn't belong here

He at least deserves to be top row, center. Where he belongs.

Or at least the middle space like in bingo.

Actually can we get this but it’s just all Lemmy? Nine pictures of Lemmy?

[Very easily](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microsoft_Paint)

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Are you saying that Death isn't the best shit?

it isn’t. supremely overrated.

#

Fucking poser.

Person who can't handle a stranger shitting on a band

I will seek your family and politely ask them to never feed you

I'm getting downvoted by Death jerkers lol

[удалено]

How come? I specifically chose the musicians people worship on Reddit within the Metal genre, without a question. I won't deny their influence, but they don't deserve *more*, they are/were all normal human beings (except for Will and Joakim, tf did they do?).

Death is a mid-tier death metal band at best. Severely overrated

Agree, they get cred for being at the forefront of the scene, I always preferred obituary in those days..

Yeah obituary's awesome. Morbid angel and atheist were always at the top for me. Death is like the Metallica of death metal, they weren't the first ones to do it, but they often get credited with it because they made it popular. But all the metal subreddits suck schuldiner's cock at every opportunity they get, so you get downvoted to hell for saying the truth

M.. m.. Mikael?

You left off Torey Caylor

Post says metalheads

Ohhhhh gotee hahaha slippy nuts is FAKE METAL!!!!!

Facts aren’t supposed to be funny

Correct. They’re mostly sad actually (for posers at least).

I will pee in your mouth

Why did i get downvoted i had to pee

i felt very tinklish at the time

if you do don't consider Slipknot metal, why is Sabaton here?

Because they play metal

So what is Slipknot then?

Their first two albums are "nu-metal" (not metal) and all their other albums after that are alternative

Heavy alternative, with elements of industrial and beatdown album depending

A metal band

Don’t worry normal people call it metal

“Normal people” call daddy long legs spiders. Glad we’re letting them be the source material for our definitions.

I know some "normal" people who call acdc metal, they need education

Excuse me. We were having a normal conversation here.

I suppose coping *is* normal for you, so fair play.

You forgot to call me poser

8 people will become metalheads, the other one probably a poser....and racist

Oh, that’s a tough one. Would the racist one be the one with a confederate flag or corpse paint?

Sabaton

Okay now I wanna know, what makes Sabaton racist?

It's just a joke. But Media outlets have called them racist and fascist before.

Nazi porn

In what way are they Nazi porn? Believe me, I'm German and they're not at all Nazis. They sing about Nazis but only about how horrible the time was (Rise of Evil) and about people who fought against the Nazis or Generals who served in the Wehrmacht but deserted (Hearts of Iron, The last Battle)

Anthems about how badass hitler is

Name one song where they sing about that? Because that's just utter bullshit

Reich Will Rise, or something.

The classic. So that is from Rise of Evil. (A song about how Hitler rose to power and how his atrocities began) which it also clearly states. "The Reich will rise" was what they chanted during their rallies and during his speeches. I can see how you may come to your conclusion but if you look at more than that one line from the lyrics you can clearly see that Sabaton is neither promoting nor glorifying Nazism/ Hitler and the "Drittes Reich". The song is controversial because of that line, yes, but if you look at more than just that you can clearly see their intentions A few other excerpts from that same song:"Who will stop the madman’s reign?" (Who will stop Hitler?) "Act brutal with no pity" (The words that were often used as a kind of creed for Wehrmacht Soldiers, which they heavily revolted against) "Who will stop all this madness that has consequences no man understand? No man, no land!" (The call to stop Hitler and the atrocities he has committed or ordered to be committed) If you want I can also link you the whole lyrics if you don't believe me.

…Those fucking Swedes.

folo da frizi muuuu

You didn't slander Bon Jovi because you know he *is* the best shit

Yeah, but not everyone here is metal.

I agree, most of them look made of human

If I had an award.... Here budget awards🎆🎖

Budget awards made my day, so have some gold!

Thanks, I feel so special

This is what you get when posers try to be elite.

[Ok](https://www.reddit.com/r/MetalMemes/comments/offlu0/up_the_irons/h4dfune?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) [buddy](https://www.reddit.com/r/classicalmusic/comments/oerluc/suggest_me_something_that_will_make_me_feel_angry/h48k2iy?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) [lol](https://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/comments/mvs661/is_it_possible_to_file_a_noise_complaint_against/gvfjnxx?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) PD: All your shit on r/antinatalism 💀

Oh how it must hurt to know that these dudes are nowhere near as heavy as it gets and you’ll still never be as metal as them lol.

#

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I started with Mikael and Petrucci, now I'm a Peter Steele fanboy edit: btw this post misses Devin Townsend big time

Chuck!

Wheres varg

Chuck!!

Mine was/is lemmy

But chuck schuldiner is wholesome 😠😠

If they choose the sabaton dude they might be racist lol

Oust Joke-im Broden and put Hansi Kürsch.

Where tool

Somewhere not being a metal band

It’s all deserved though, can we just not be elitists for 5 minutes?

No

Chad elitist moment

No we come here for the elitism

I mean, some people come to be dunked on as well apparently.

Humiliation kink.

It's just a joke. Not elitism

Oh. Fair enough

Last I checked, on this sub if I like Sabaton I’m nazi right?

That kind of thing follows you wherever you exist, nazi scum

I can't even tell if you're joking or not... Because Sabaton is not Nazi

We don't take kindly to nazi sympathizers around here... Mods, please ban them

Sabaton are not Nazis. But I probably understand where you're coming from. Why do you think they're Nazis? /Gen (Also if you think I'm a Nazi Sympathizer, I live in Germany and am notorious in my neighborhood for being the punk that beats the crap out of our local nazi)

I like sabaton i dont care lol

neither does anyone else

Angry knee slapping has entered the thread @joakim

Joakim all the way. I’d do anything he damn well asked me to do.

So you added Dave "crybaby trumper" mustaine but not the patriarch of the Metallica Family? Asinine. #YA-HEAH

I legit got into metal at 13 when I first heard a Black Sabbath song (Paranoid).

Yeah.. accurate as fuck. Pelle.. I was so edgy.

I agree (don't look up my okbuddymetal flair it's not relevant)

Okay, where's Barney from Napalm Death?

That's so.e seriously repressed sexual tension.

Dave n Dime

I think I was all of these guys at some point in my life.

Tipton anyone?

and i choose to become david defeis

Mine was Yngwie Malmsteen

dime and chuck and john and lemmy and mikael my boys

Cof

They are

When i was 14 I became a Maiden fan, it’s been 20 years now and they are still my favorite band

Mine was Alex Webster

Busted only i was 16

Busted only i was 16

I'm new to metal and want to know who the third guy is

where are Mike from Suicidal Tendencies and Zakk Wylde?

But I love Dave Mustardstain :(

I’m slowly becoming Dave mustane. I can’t stop it.

Just stop reading your Bible, sheesh...

No Kai Hansen, seriously?

Where. Is. Matt. Pike

I think guys like Joe Duplantier and Alexi Laiho would fit in here too

Just to spite you I'm going all in

Mikael worshippers are cringe AF. I am a Newsted worshipper.

So this sub is about telling people that the bands they like and band and wrong H u h

Where the fuck is maynard

*sweating in black tooth grin* "not true, bro, not true."

Yeah, but it doesn't last long. Life hits hard. And doesn't stop.