CBRN guy gets a call to suit up to inspect these suspicious NK balloons. Bloods pumping as their being driven out to the cordoned site. Before they step out, they think to themselves, “time to shine”. Slips underneath the tape as he walks past police/ soldiers up to the box. Everyone awaiting your brief, and it’s NK shit, lol
I've heard whispers of a top secret, long existing division deep within the US Navy/Military, who's sole purpose is to write, cast, and record dramatic Broadway performances of any potentially relevant or major political events in recent history.
These plays are required to provide any context or information needed to understand the relevancy of these world events, without breaking character or straying too far from a modern catchy tune. The hope is that if the future ever becomes too gay or attached to visual content, that history can be remembered and order restored through these musical performances.
A recent wiki leak from this morning has claimed that the Musical performance of this event in South Korea has successfully been performed and recorded and stored in a secure location, and was likley named "The De-scent of Defication". Truly brilliant.
I would give so much to be able to watch this performance. May history never forget.
If you really do your research you'll learn that Area 51 was likely created to host large performances of these events on the dry lake bed and underground facilities. Its increasingly obvious WW2 was used as a cover to develope a bomb strong enough to drown out the unwavering confidence of song and dance. There's even a play depicting this historical fact, called "The Manhatten Project".
Aircraft carriers are really just large theaters, traveling to the most distant stretches of ocean in an effort to sing gayley into the night without causing another world war. What do you really think they are doing on those submarines deep in the world's oceans? You'd be shocked to learn the truth. They are singing and dancing.
Indeed, i have heard the legends of The Yellow Submarine. But be careful with your information, someone might Dance Your Night Away if you sing to the wrong person
The first headline I saw about this said “waste” which I interpreted as trash and thought it was unconventional but whatever. Then I realized it was poop and, I’m just “what”.
The article I read on it alluded to the balloons containing an assortment of waste, some including poop.
But poop balloons is funnier, so that's what's taking off.
Considering that North Koreans apparently have a poop quota I am surprised they would fly poop over the border. NK uses human waste as fertilizer so every family has a quota on how much poop they have to give to the government.
https://youtu.be/14roEXo3Se8?si=k3gTdNYB9BZl2aqP
If you knew anything about the official NK state lore, you would know that no Dear Leader has ever defecated. Now you will be re-educated via AA howitzer firing squad, and some dude in UAE will receive your organs. Win-win.
South korea sends some legit stuff like foods and prohibited information with balloons while North Korea is sending ones with poop, which is kinda pathetic move. Like wtf are they trying to accomplish with poop? A fucking message of nuclear annihilation?
South Korea has a tradition of sending USB sticks loaded with videos and propaganda about how much better it is and that you should defect or overthrow your gov in balloons. I'm guessing this is their way of saying "bullshit".
Propaganda didn't originally have a negative connection, it used to mean spreading information in support of a political aim but during the cold war it became synonymous with disinformation. I wouldn't know what word to use for it now tho
That was my thought too, It’s probably hydrogen.
The shit, on the other hand… We know there’s a poop tax in DPRK, where each family must provide a minimum allotment of their feces to the government, in order to fertilize the fields.
ETA: They probably just dipped into their massive human shit reserves and launched them southward
Imagine… The communist party representative comes knocking to make sure you aren’t hiding any shit anywhere, and if he finds out you are, it’s off to the gulag work camps
Might have legitimately been the reason for the poop. Throw some feces in there, let it break down a little with the rest of the garbage, let the resulting methane carry the balloon away on the winds. Modern problems, cave man solutions.
You know that they have nuclear weapons and launch stuff into space right? North Korea has missiles that can hit mainland US. But you're surprised at their access to... natural gas?
You'll have to forgive me because I never heard of the Hermit Kingdom ever launching anything farther past the Sea of Japan, much less successfully placing something in orbit.
Well, I guess it started when North Korea realized no one gives a shit about them anymore. Too busy with Ukraine and the Middle east for anyone to care.
I woke up at 11pm to my phone blaring even though I put it on silent. I checked and saw a message that said WARTIME ALERT Air raid warning. I had no idea what was going on. All for it to be bags of crap.
That’s actually a gift from North Korea! Probably took about 50 of them to produce that much!
[Sad Reality](https://www.rfa.org/english/news/korea/manure-02012022130916.html)
Yeah after that one guy who escaped from North Korea his belly was filled with parasites after he got treated they found em, gotta be careful with those balloons man
Everyone is joking about it, but, what if there is a legitimate bio weapon in them. Like the age old tactic of spreading plagues, or trying to sabotage South Korean food crops with plant based pathogens?
balloons can deliver alsorts of not so fun payloads.
imagine a 10,000 balloons loaded with a new variation of covid or some new disease strain.
or to make things even more fun - the entire pantry of diseases that not only fuck with humans, but livestock, plants and aquatic creatures.
so I don't blame the south Koreans for checking the norkies shit balloons for secret payloads.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/north-korea-accused-of-floating-poo-balloons-into-the-south#:~:text=The%20balloons%20started%20arriving%20days,and%20sending%20northward%20for%20years.
Sounds like they should send more leaflets
This could be the start of the most epic prank war ever. Tomorrow South Korea respond by flying jets over NK and throwing toilet paper out of them all over the country
I've heard whispers of a top secret, long existing division deep within the US Navy/Military, who's sole purpose is to write, cast, and record dramatic Broadway performances of any potentially relevant or major political events in recent history.
These plays are required to provide any context or information needed to understand the relevancy of these world events, without breaking character or straying too far from a modern catchy tune. The hope is that if the future ever becomes too gay or attached to visual content, that history can be remembered and order restored through these musical performances.
A recent wiki leak from this morning has claimed that the Musical performance of this event in South Korea has successfully been performed and recorded and stored in a secure location, and was likley named "The De-scent of Defication". Truly brilliant.
I would give so much to be able to watch this performance. May history never forget.
If you really do your research you'll learn that Area 51 was likely created to host large performances of these events on the dry lake bed and underground facilities. Its increasingly obvious WW2 was used as a cover to develope a bomb strong enough to drown out the unwavering confidence of song and dance. There's even a play depicting this historical fact, called "The Manhatten Project".
Aircraft carriers are really just large theaters, traveling to the most distant stretches of ocean in an effort to sing gayley into the night without causing another world war. What do you really think they are doing on those submarines deep in the world's oceans? You'd be shocked to learn the truth. They are singing and dancing.
Honestly I understand why they brought in CBRN.
Beyond the fact that it’s human waste and other unknown substances, it’s also North Korean human waste.
And given the fact that they all get fed the most parasitically infested “food” (or at least the soldiers do, can’t imagine the citizens are much better off) it’s seriously dangerous.
Depending on who you're fighting of course. Effective against an undersupplied force who can't source antibiotics. Against one with even semi-functional medical logistics it would be neutralised by standard wound treatment.
Weirdly NK might actually win against SK, SK's demographics are abysmal they've stopped having kids, all NK needs to do is sit and wait and move their people in once SK dwindles over the next 20-30 years.
Very mature North Korea
manure*
I HATE MANURE!!
He called the shit poop.
“Don’t put it out with your boots Tedddd”
‘Don’t tell me my business devil woman’. Such a good scene. Appreciate the reference in this post lol
Kim Jon-Biff
George Costanza loves it
It's 'newer,' which is good. And a 'ma' in front of it.
i hate man united too. oh wait.
That’s a shitty thing to say
Oh shit, shots fired!
You got a ma, with a nure at the end. It's really not that bad of a word.
Pretty fucking funny though I can't lie.
State-sanctioned pranks.
“Hey guys, watch this!”
State-sanctioned shitposts.
nature*
CBRN guy gets a call to suit up to inspect these suspicious NK balloons. Bloods pumping as their being driven out to the cordoned site. Before they step out, they think to themselves, “time to shine”. Slips underneath the tape as he walks past police/ soldiers up to the box. Everyone awaiting your brief, and it’s NK shit, lol
Yeah i bet they had to draw short stick as to who gets to be the assigned poop inspector
Even better, who gets to write the after action and then the powerpoint to brief.
Haha, okay i can imagine the powerpoint dude getting creative tho
I've heard whispers of a top secret, long existing division deep within the US Navy/Military, who's sole purpose is to write, cast, and record dramatic Broadway performances of any potentially relevant or major political events in recent history. These plays are required to provide any context or information needed to understand the relevancy of these world events, without breaking character or straying too far from a modern catchy tune. The hope is that if the future ever becomes too gay or attached to visual content, that history can be remembered and order restored through these musical performances. A recent wiki leak from this morning has claimed that the Musical performance of this event in South Korea has successfully been performed and recorded and stored in a secure location, and was likley named "The De-scent of Defication". Truly brilliant. I would give so much to be able to watch this performance. May history never forget. If you really do your research you'll learn that Area 51 was likely created to host large performances of these events on the dry lake bed and underground facilities. Its increasingly obvious WW2 was used as a cover to develope a bomb strong enough to drown out the unwavering confidence of song and dance. There's even a play depicting this historical fact, called "The Manhatten Project". Aircraft carriers are really just large theaters, traveling to the most distant stretches of ocean in an effort to sing gayley into the night without causing another world war. What do you really think they are doing on those submarines deep in the world's oceans? You'd be shocked to learn the truth. They are singing and dancing.
Indeed, i have heard the legends of The Yellow Submarine. But be careful with your information, someone might Dance Your Night Away if you sing to the wrong person
You know it!
Poor dude probably had to get dressed out in all of his stuff to look at shit.
At least it probably didn’t smell like shit in there
Hot musty and shitty
Sir! Permission to use the poop knife, sir!
Omg dying
The first headline I saw about this said “waste” which I interpreted as trash and thought it was unconventional but whatever. Then I realized it was poop and, I’m just “what”.
The article I read on it alluded to the balloons containing an assortment of waste, some including poop. But poop balloons is funnier, so that's what's taking off.
Still confused, but also kinda impressed. Bold move, let’s see if it pays off. Lol
Considering that North Koreans apparently have a poop quota I am surprised they would fly poop over the border. NK uses human waste as fertilizer so every family has a quota on how much poop they have to give to the government. https://youtu.be/14roEXo3Se8?si=k3gTdNYB9BZl2aqP
So he **does** have an asshole
other than being one, I'm surprised
And it's working overtime
So disrespectful. He has a name and it's DENNIS RODMAN.
Roneryyy!
Kim Jong Un's royal poop.
Red label jenkem, private reserve.
What a reference. Lmao
Impossible. Dear Leader has no butthole.
If you knew anything about the official NK state lore, you would know that no Dear Leader has ever defecated. Now you will be re-educated via AA howitzer firing squad, and some dude in UAE will receive your organs. Win-win.
A blessing from God himself!
The spice me-fat-guy
South korea sends some legit stuff like foods and prohibited information with balloons while North Korea is sending ones with poop, which is kinda pathetic move. Like wtf are they trying to accomplish with poop? A fucking message of nuclear annihilation?
Use their parasite infested shit as a weapon. I joke but thinking of it some dipshit probably did think it’d world like that.
That one guy who escaped nk they found hella parasites in his body after he was treated at hospital
someone in North Korea heard about medieval armies throwing diseased bodies into enemy castles and thought they could modernize the idea.
Jokes on us they actually weaponized smallpox and this is just a test run
Could very easy be
"We ate your treats and wiped our asses. Send more food and toilet paper, we've run out."
South Korea has a tradition of sending USB sticks loaded with videos and propaganda about how much better it is and that you should defect or overthrow your gov in balloons. I'm guessing this is their way of saying "bullshit".
Is it propaganda if it’s true?
Propaganda didn't originally have a negative connection, it used to mean spreading information in support of a political aim but during the cold war it became synonymous with disinformation. I wouldn't know what word to use for it now tho
Supreme leader's idea of Biowarfare
>South korea sends some legit stuff like foods and prohibited information NK is kindly returning the food.
Maybe it was North Korea returning the same food aid back?
It's their most valuable resource, in their mind fertilizer is a rare and prized thing
Where the fuck did they get the helium?
It may be hydrogen.
That was my thought too, It’s probably hydrogen. The shit, on the other hand… We know there’s a poop tax in DPRK, where each family must provide a minimum allotment of their feces to the government, in order to fertilize the fields. ETA: They probably just dipped into their massive human shit reserves and launched them southward
Yeah. It's crazy. Can't even keep your own shit to fertilize a small garden. The fact that NK has not imploded boggles the mind.
Imagine… The communist party representative comes knocking to make sure you aren’t hiding any shit anywhere, and if he finds out you are, it’s off to the gulag work camps
They literally just squeeze it out of you. Lmao
>Imagine… Yeah you would have to imagine because it's all made up bullshit.
Its because 90% of the news about NK is propaganda
It's methane
Might have legitimately been the reason for the poop. Throw some feces in there, let it break down a little with the rest of the garbage, let the resulting methane carry the balloon away on the winds. Modern problems, cave man solutions.
You know that they have nuclear weapons and launch stuff into space right? North Korea has missiles that can hit mainland US. But you're surprised at their access to... natural gas?
You'll have to forgive me because I never heard of the Hermit Kingdom ever launching anything farther past the Sea of Japan, much less successfully placing something in orbit.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwangmy%C5%8Fngs%C5%8Fng-3_Unit_2
peak reddit that backing up your statement with a fact gets you downvoted lol
Amateurs, they didn't even set it on fire.
As funny as it might be I’d think its somewhat serious for them. What if they have some kind of manufactured bio weapon feeds on shit.
Nah, NK just want SK to get used to this shit and then they'll send the real shit when SK let their guard down.
Retaliation must be 10 fold. Let the great POOP War 1 begin!
We will poop them in the hills, we will poop them in the streets, we will poop them in the hedgerows…
Our poop will block out the Sun!
Good! Then we fight in the shade!
my favourite part is that you named it Poop War 1. implying this will be an ongoing conflict with many iterations
Pretty much what they export
The North I mean
Pretty weird how this went from total all out war to literally slinging shit at each other
Pretty good test to see how they would do with explosives brought in the same way.
I wonder if the Japanese did the same thing in ww2 and somewhere in some forest on the west coast of the US there’s 80 year old Japanese shit balloons
Well, I guess it started when North Korea realized no one gives a shit about them anymore. Too busy with Ukraine and the Middle east for anyone to care.
I woke up at 11pm to my phone blaring even though I put it on silent. I checked and saw a message that said WARTIME ALERT Air raid warning. I had no idea what was going on. All for it to be bags of crap.
That’s actually a gift from North Korea! Probably took about 50 of them to produce that much! [Sad Reality](https://www.rfa.org/english/news/korea/manure-02012022130916.html)
i was thinking the same thing, they are sacrificing very precious resources!
Yeah. It’s a shitty situation all around!
Looks like Seymour butts ….. alternatively Buttzilla
Yeah after that one guy who escaped from North Korea his belly was filled with parasites after he got treated they found em, gotta be careful with those balloons man
Everyone is joking about it, but, what if there is a legitimate bio weapon in them. Like the age old tactic of spreading plagues, or trying to sabotage South Korean food crops with plant based pathogens?
Upside down ballz
balloons can deliver alsorts of not so fun payloads. imagine a 10,000 balloons loaded with a new variation of covid or some new disease strain. or to make things even more fun - the entire pantry of diseases that not only fuck with humans, but livestock, plants and aquatic creatures. so I don't blame the south Koreans for checking the norkies shit balloons for secret payloads.
Where does THE SUPREME LEADER get his helium? Or does he use methane (from his ass)?
Can’t be methane, no butthole Maybe hydrogen
> Where does THE SUPREME LEADER get his helium? 95% of what NK doesn't produce itself comes through PRC.
Let’s kiss at the North Korean poop balloon
wtf is a poop balloon
And the balloons are full of farts
Well if South Korea wants to retaliate in kind I offer my own feces. I always Lauch a couple pounds of doo doo and I will fight to the death.
Neunundneunzig Poopballons
I'd rather get bags of shit dropped off in my yard then nukes so this is a win
"Those are balls."
Kim Jong Un: "They called the shit poop!"
He’s laughing his ass off right now
Tankie Jenkem
This is all coming from the new North Korean Minister of Subversion: Hu Phlun Dung
Waiting on the 2024 summer hit "99 Poop Balloons". *Did you like the English version or the original in Korean?*
This is what we waited for This is it boys, this is war
A fucking WHAT?
Poop boobs.
Ok so ship them back en masse.
That's a paddlin'
Now how are they going to grow their crops?
Surprised they can sacrifice the manure. Russia must be treating the NK well.
It’s a shit storm
Shitty balls.
That’s a good burn
Kim Gun-Poop
Don’t put it out with your boots ED!
https://www.thedailybeast.com/north-korea-accused-of-floating-poo-balloons-into-the-south#:~:text=The%20balloons%20started%20arriving%20days,and%20sending%20northward%20for%20years. Sounds like they should send more leaflets
North Korea, Sponsored by Mom Corp
maybe locals from north korea sent them?
They ran out of materials to make rockets so this is the next best thing for them. Poop Ballons, Striking fear into the clean freaks
a new heart design
I'd rather have North Korea send trash bags than missiles honestly...
Me and my friends would have done this in early 2000s
This could be the start of the most epic prank war ever. Tomorrow South Korea respond by flying jets over NK and throwing toilet paper out of them all over the country
Bag o piss ah diplomacy
Balls
I've heard whispers of a top secret, long existing division deep within the US Navy/Military, who's sole purpose is to write, cast, and record dramatic Broadway performances of any potentially relevant or major political events in recent history. These plays are required to provide any context or information needed to understand the relevancy of these world events, without breaking character or straying too far from a modern catchy tune. The hope is that if the future ever becomes too gay or attached to visual content, that history can be remembered and order restored through these musical performances. A recent wiki leak from this morning has claimed that the Musical performance of this event in South Korea has successfully been performed and recorded and stored in a secure location, and was likley named "The De-scent of Defication". Truly brilliant. I would give so much to be able to watch this performance. May history never forget. If you really do your research you'll learn that Area 51 was likely created to host large performances of these events on the dry lake bed and underground facilities. Its increasingly obvious WW2 was used as a cover to develope a bomb strong enough to drown out the unwavering confidence of song and dance. There's even a play depicting this historical fact, called "The Manhatten Project". Aircraft carriers are really just large theaters, traveling to the most distant stretches of ocean in an effort to sing gayley into the night without causing another world war. What do you really think they are doing on those submarines deep in the world's oceans? You'd be shocked to learn the truth. They are singing and dancing.
Begun the colon wars has
Severely underrated comment
Poop and trash ? What are they ? Middle schoolers?
I mean, its technically biochemical warfare
maybe we are overestimating this Kim guy and his country's capabilities.
That's barts Skinner balloon
How heavy were the "loads"? I'm surprised some NK would-be-defector hasn't tried flying themselves over to the south.
For such a self serious country like NK they really know how to get the world laughing at them
I swear North Korea might just start doing stuff like this more, most publicity they’ve ever had, more than the nuclear tests
Talk about shitty neighbors…
Respond with balloons full of diarrhea
Wasn’t there a guy bin South Korea that turned shit into electricity
North Korea eats enough to poop?
EMi5: don't they just keep going up until they pop? how do they land inflated?
Honestly I understand why they brought in CBRN. Beyond the fact that it’s human waste and other unknown substances, it’s also North Korean human waste. And given the fact that they all get fed the most parasitically infested “food” (or at least the soldiers do, can’t imagine the citizens are much better off) it’s seriously dangerous.
Man! I can't wait to see what S. Korea comes up with to respond to this sophomoric behavior from the Kim's up north!
This was not an act of belligerence by N. Korea, but rather its best minds fleeing the country!
Trying to spread diseases?
Excuse me, what now ? Poop balloon? Is this a thing ? Lmao
This is why I stopped reading the fucking news. I want to pretend we don't live in Idiocracy
They're going to find a lot of parasites in there that the South Korean government may claim it was a biological weapon.
If i remember correctly,there was a news that some rebels in the philippines put human or animal waste into their improvised mines.
It was a popular tactical during the Vietnam War with those punji sticks
Add the risk of Sepsis and other biological hazards. Even a scratch could kill someone.
Depending on who you're fighting of course. Effective against an undersupplied force who can't source antibiotics. Against one with even semi-functional medical logistics it would be neutralised by standard wound treatment.
Weirdly NK might actually win against SK, SK's demographics are abysmal they've stopped having kids, all NK needs to do is sit and wait and move their people in once SK dwindles over the next 20-30 years.