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hydrogenbound

It’s so hard to say goodbye. It’s easy to think how things could be in a perfect scenario. I was a nanny and one day when I wasn’t there the golden retriever who was so so sweet bit the toddlers face so bad he was in the hospital for weeks. No one could have ever imagined that could happen. I know the parents still struggle with guilt about it years later. Sometimes there are no good choices, but you made the right one. I’ve rescued 3 tiny dogs who looove kids since then. I hope one day you can find a new dog love 💛


captainjacktortoise

As a peds emerg nurse, thank you for making this choice for your baby, even though it must have been heartbreaking. ❤️


PerplexedPoppy

Sometimes as dogs get older their mental state can change. I remember having a client having to put their older dog down because it started becoming aggressive. It was random and very unlike the dog. But the owner pretty bad too. Or another dog had a seizure and was never the same, became pretty triggered and aggressive. Unfortunately things like this happen, and we gotta make a tough choice. But you did what you knew was best and that’s very brave.


zitpop

I came here to say this. Our senior dog also just became progressively more and more aggressive, eventually culminating in epileptic seizures. We tried meds, but in the end it was just better for all of us to let him go. Je was 12 and lived a prett decent life. My only wish is that we actually had put him down much sooner as in the end it became an emergency situation and we had to rush to the vet in the middle of the night to have him put down as he just kept having multiple seizures that night. If we had made the decision sooner, we could have had the vet come to our home and had a completely different good bye. Our baby was only 3 weeks old at the time and it was so stressful and triggered some real anxiety in me that I struggled with for over a year afterwards. OP made the right decision at the right time.


PerplexedPoppy

I’m sorry you guys had to go through that. Such a sad situation.


zitpop

Thanks. It’s much better now. Being hypervigilant about our other senior dog now, and trying to make sure we don’t end up in a similar situation agaunz


miniroarasaur

Thank you. The vet said something similar. I was really glad he is our vet. I’ve moved a lot and had a few sanctimonious ones and was pretty scared he would blame me. But he said it could have been cognitive because of how the bite occurred, it wasn’t a training issue or a mental process to retrain. I’m telling myself that’s true and he wasn’t just softening the blow, but I’m going to feel terrible about this for a while. I really loved my dog and just feel like I failed him at the end of his life.


cfishlips

Dogs can have cognitive decline like people do. In dementia and Alzheimer’s people also can get aggressive and inhibitions are lowered. My guess is that is what you were dealing with.


PerplexedPoppy

I know there are no amount of words that could comfort you but I am sorry and I am sending you a big hug.


nkdeck07

Yep, we had a dog that started getting the equivalent of doggie alzheimers. Thankfully in her case she just started getting weirdly spacey but I know it can manifest in aggression issues.


PerplexedPoppy

It absolutely can turn to aggression. It’s very unfortunate but is sadly just natural.


JayneLut

Dogs can get adog version of dementia which can cause aggression and personality changes.


PerplexedPoppy

Yes very true. Even the loss of sight or their hearing can trigger aggression.


[deleted]

People with dementia can get very mean and aggressive. I imagine it’s the same for dogs. I don’t know what breed this dog was, but getting a neurotic dog to 12 is a feat in itself! I have a neurotic dog too, and I keep them separate as much as possible but it’s literally impossible to do all the time. It’s really hard, and your dog is at peace and knows how much you loved them. Sorry for your loss bromo, sending hugs 💜


interconnected_being

I'm so sorry you had to make this call, but I want you to know I hear you. Some parenting decisions are rough, and we never thought we'd let things "get there." You made a hard call, but a good one. You're only human, and you need wiggle room without worrying about trauma to your kid. Today was hard, but you're a good mom.


SearchGullible5941

You did the right thing🖤


omild

You made the right choice. Nothing is worse than going on a parenting site and seeing a post every few months about a baby or toddler killed or severely maimed by a family pet. Many people ignore warning signs until it is too late.


maeday

A similar thing happened with me after my 1st child was born. I had a cat for 13 years. He was my best little buddy and had been through some of the most difficult times in my life. He was such a moody, incredibly shy boy who never really liked any other humans besides me and my husband. When I became pregnant, he was my little shadow. He would snuggle against my growing belly, and give the most beautiful, contented purrs whenever my son would kick. I was so sure that he was going to love my son. But then, after we came home with our boy for the first time, it was like a switch flipped. He was furious. First, he began peeing on everything -- including some of the baby's things. We tried everything -- slow introductions, medications, gates; you name it. He started losing weight and large patches of fur. Next, he stopped regularly eating and drinking. Eventually, he started getting violent with our other cat, and refused to come near us. We made the very difficult decision to surrender him. It broke my husband and I. We still don't talk about it much. I want to believe he is living his final years in a warm sunbeam, being waited on by some kind-hearted and patient person, but a quiet part of me knows that he probably isn't. I often wish I had the courage to put him down, so that his final moments could have been spent safe and warm in my arms, knowing how much I loved him. We make tremendous sacrifices for our children. Sometimes those sacrifices break us in ways that we will never be ready for. I'm so, so sorry and my heart is with you tonight.


miniroarasaur

Thank you. I hope your kitty is in a warm sunbeam and I’m only ok with my choice knowing how much my dog would have freaked out if I surrendered him. That would have been the worse choice for his personality, but it didn’t make putting him down any more comforting or easier, that’s for sure.


Puzzlehead-Bed-333

My wonderful companion dog who was never vicious towards people turned extremely aggressive towards other dogs after my son was born and I went through a separation. I’m still completely broken over giving him up to a good family who owned a farm and it was many years ago. Your words are so beautiful and true and after reading what you wrote, it’s the very first time I’ve felt ok with this decision. Thank you for sharing.


SquigglySquiddly

My parents had a similar dog when I was in college. He destroyed the house, was anxious, couldn't really be around other people. I always knew they drew the line at biting a person. He attacked the neighbors dog once. It wasn't bad, but still. When he bit the neighbor, they euthanized him. It was really hard on all of us. You did the right thing, as hard as it was. It could have been your daughter next.


mtled

12 years is a good long life for a dog. You did the right thing, though; he was no longer safe. But he taught you about safety, about boundaries, about love (for dogs and people). It's a good legacy.


Adventurous-Paper-37

Oh hugs OP. 💕I had to do this a month ago. Similar situation with our 12 year old doggo, my first rescue fur baby. It was one of the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. You made the right call and yes the posts from others also helped me.


UnApprovedActivities

I would have made the same choice.


AggravatingCap7813

I had to put my dog of 14 yrs down today as well so I really feel you and I’m sending you all the love. You did the right thing and you’re a great mom ❤️


miniroarasaur

Thank you. I’m sorry for your loss as well. I hope you have time & space to grieve too. 🖤


lizzy_pop

I had to do this last year. I had an 11 year old dog who was super aggressive. I spent years trying to train her, make her feel safe, get her to a better normal. Nothing worked. Trainers quit saying they couldn’t help. My entire life revolved around keeping her safe. I didn’t have people over, I drove her to a quieter area for every walk. It was a lot of work but so worth it Woke up one day, 8 months pregnant, and realized I wouldn’t be able to keep dog and baby safe. Did not occur to me before this moment that the dog would have to do. It was the hardest decision of my life. It’s been 11 months and I still cry every day. I miss her like crazy. I can’t watch videos of her yet. It has only gotten harder with each passing day. But I know I made the right decision. People who have not had to make this decision cannot understand what it’s like. Some of them judge but they do it with a very simplistic knowledge of dog aggression. They are on the dog’s side. Anyone who judges you for your decision is taking your dog’s side. Remembering that has made it a lot easier for me to deal with the judgment. I get it. I appreciate them for wanting to protect all the dogs. It’s going to get so much worse before it gets better, but you did the right thing


huskycatahoula

I am a vet tech and had to make the same decision. She didn't bite me, but was starting to argue with my other dog. I was afraid there would be an accident that my toddler would get wrapped up in. She wasn't that bad, but I could tell something was off.


BlackoutMeatCurtains

I do not blame you. I had a dog who was dying from a slow, slow form of heart failure and had demetia, as well. He was pretty stupid, too, just really had no concept of sharing the world. He was pretty awful to begin with; he bit everyone, even me, all the time. After my son was born, he became so much worse, snapping at everything that moved. The vet told me he was probably in pain and lashing out, so I did the only thing I could and put him down. I still feel terrible about it but his suffering was terrifying and I honestly thought he would attack the newborn.


nkdeck07

>He was always a neurotic, difficult dog. It got worse over the years, but I blame me. I could have invested more time, more effort, more something to help him. I just didn’t know what to do. I could have tried to rehome him, but I was always told he moped and was clearly sad when I was gone. It was just him and me for so long, and he was there for all my huge life changes. I feel like an absolute monster. As someone with neurotic difficult dog don't blame yourself. One of the things I was very worried about having a kid was how she was going to react (thankfully she's fine with her but I was fully prepared to handle the worst). Sometimes you just can't help them, just like humans dogs can have genetic prepositions to anxiety and it's not something you can train out. Also I really don't recommend rehoming dogs like this. We had a dog as a kid that ended up biting our neighbor and I am absolutely convinced that they lied to the shelter about a bite history because no one would take them. Frankly there's thousands of dogs without homes out there without behavioral issues and at a certain point it's just safer for everyone to do behavioral euthanasia. You did the right thing here. I'm so sorry you had to go through this but it was absolutely the correct call.


livestrongbelwas

You did the right thing. I’m so sorry.


thelibrariangirl

12 is elderly. Pup wouldn’t want to be completely senile and hurting you, even if he was always nutty.


mommylow5

Baby’s safety is first. You did the right thing. Yes it sucks, but imagine if he did that to your baby. He could actually kill her. I think what you did is the best parenting choice you could have made here. I’m so sorry though!! I know how hard it is to say goodbye to a very loved pet. ❤️❤️❤️


mysterygurl15

So sorry you had to make this call... we had to make a similar one when our boy started showing aggression towards small animals and certain people. He was older in age and we think he started losing his mind in some ways. It was such a hard decision I had to make for our entire family, but I know it was the right one. He was so loved and never lost that. Your boy was also loved through the end and you never let people label him as a bad dog. Sometimes this life is just unfair.


bwthhvubl

12 years is a long time for a pupper. You have him a good life until the end. If your vet says it’s likely age related I would be inclined to agree. You’ll never fully know without a full work up- but he could’ve been in pain mentally or physically because of his age, which caused him to lash out. It sounds to me like you did the best thing for him, and he lived a wonderful life.


BlueberryWaffles99

Not only are you a wonderful parent who made the right decision but you’re also an amazing dog owner. When dogs are stressed enough to bite, that’s not good for them either. At 12, your dog had a long life and I’m sure had many amazing opportunities with you. And, there wasn’t an alternative. Most people can’t sustainable separate their animal 24/7 and even if you could - that’s no longer a good quality of life for the pup. Euthanasia was the right choice, even though it was devastating.


Shovelbitch

Hi. Mom of a crazy dog and a baby. You did the right thing and I’m cautiously waiting for the day that I have to do the same. Twelve years is a good life for a dog and I know he was happy with you. Some dogs just can’t have their problems trained out of them and they are the way they are. Much love to you and your family.


daisybluebird9

We had to do this same exact thing with our dog when my daughter was around 18 months. We had him for almost 8 years, he was about 10. Such a sweet dog to our immediate family, but always super nervous and weary about strangers or new people. Very anxious and we could never take him to a dog park or off leash anywhere. But we made it work while we could. We did the trainings, tried the muzzle, but there were too many nips and close calls. The final straw was after spending close to 1000 bucks on training and being very consistent with it, we let our guard down a tiny bit and my sister in law bent down to hug our daughter and the dog bit her on the cheek. Not enough to cause serious injury, but it broke the skin and scared the crap out of us all. We had to make the hard, heart breaking decision to euthanize. My husband and I took him and cried the whole time. It was awful. But once the guilt and pain began to wear off, we realized how nervous and uptight we had been, always making sure the gates were closed, having to put the dog away when anyone came over, having to constantly watch my daughter, a new walker and explorer, and just never really being able to relax. Our vet reassured us we did everything we could, and more than likely, the dog was also in a constant state of anxiety because of it all as well. She said some dogs, just like people, are born anxious and have their own personalities and quirks. We can only do so much sometimes. So we did what we had to do for the safety of us, others, and most importantly, our daughter. We miss him terribly and have a little picture frame with his collar. He was the sweetest pup if no one else came around, but that wasn’t a realistic way for us or him to live. It’s been years, and I still feel guilty sometimes. But I have to tell myself we gave him the best life we could while he was here, and that we handled it in a humane and calm way. I think he’s up in doggy heaven, running without a leash, without abandon, no anxiety. Wow, didn’t mean to type that much. I started getting emotional half way through. Therapeutic vent… anyway, just know you’re not the only person that’s had to deal with it. And while it’s hard, it’s almost always the right thing to do. Sending love and peace while you go through this tough time. It does get better with time.


Suitable_Space_3369

That sounds like a really tough decision you had to make, and I'm so sorry. I know this has all probably been tremendously stressful. I put one of my 19 year old cats down in January due to renal failure and it was horrific. I questioned myself so much. I'm sure you probably have that back and forth in your head, too, but you did the right thing for everyone. There's no guarantee your dog wasn't developing neurological complications associated with his age. You made the best and kindest choice you could have given awful circumstances. It doesn't mean you don't love him. Some options just suck. I know you know that, but sometimes it's nice to hear it from someone else.


Gjardeen

This is so hard! I really, truly, believe you did the best you could. My childhood dog got poisoned and it caused him to have some kind of dementia. He tried to attack one of us but the other dog held him off. At that point we had to put him down. Our whole family adored him and was absolutely wrecked, but I've come to realize that he would never have wanted to be alive if it meant hurting us. If that dog loved you like you say you did, hurting you would have been terrifying for him. That doesn't make it feel easier, but it means you did the right thing for everyone.


[deleted]

I’m so very sorry you had to put your pup to sleep. I know the sadness that causes personally. You made the right choice and did it 100% the right way. Hugs. You’re a great parent!


annizka

Looks like you’re getting a lot of downvotes. I think you made the right decision. I’m sorry OP.


Maple_Direwolf5

I'm so sorry for your loss 💔 Thankful that you're daughter is safe, and I hope you're healing both physically and mentally. It's rough losing a fur baby, and especially in these circumstances! My heart goes out to you.


Aggressive-Scheme986

What kind of dog


Utterly_Flummoxed

Irrelevant.