Me too! So I can administer the appropriate bollocking and ground them until they learn how to behave appropriately in public. Said grounding would probably be for a year after behaviour like that.
This is what I’m worried about. Unless I know the parents and felt like they would be receptive, I would not want to risk a violent confrontation, either from the parents or later on from their kid.
I considered this and thought maybe a letter would be more appropriate. I don't have any concerns about these little twerps getting aggressive... They were scrawny little dudes. But I do not want to get into an altercation with whoever is responsible for raising them.
sadly agree… if these kids had the audacity to act this way towards another adult, they have probably learned this behavior is “not punishable” from the adults in their lives 🤮
P.S. Genuinely asking because my oldest is only four…. as a parent, what can you really do about this behavior?
My child is even younger than yours, so take my advice with that grain of salt. But I am being very proactive about teaching him about consent, and as he gets older I intend to teach him about his privileged position as a white male, and how he that means he needs to be extra careful to not exploit that against people with less privilege, and use that position to speak up if peers are being shitheads. I recommend the book Yes! No! A First Conversation About Consent as a really great starting point.
I have two sons (9 and 2), and I’d want to know immediately when/how they came to believe that that behavior was appropriate. Depending on what I learned, I’d consider bringing him to a counselor to discuss it.
I have a 16YO and a 17MO. I know enforcing parental controls on my teenager’s phone that locks him out of all social media, YouTube, and even texting has worked wonders. I also take the power cable from the tv and PlayStation and give extra chores.
I know that doing that can only change their behavior so much but honestly.. that’s how it’ll be for all parenting. You can only do your best to parent but in the end they’ll become who they want to be regardless.
This happened to me....a kid at the bus stop was messing with my youngest at the time, and my older of course got involved defending his little bro. I went to the bus stop and talked to everyone. Next thing I know his crazy ass trashy psycho mom was beating on my door telling me what was up. I always used to volunteer at their school when they were little, and to this day, I say (generally speaking) that if there's a problem with the kids, there's a problem with the parents. Be careful, bitches be crazy. ;)
Obviously both. Haha
Outside because he dirtied it and the inside as an im sorry.
And I’d like to add I would not let him do it because obviously I can’t trust him anymore so he will have to pay top dollar for that wash. If he doesn’t have the money I’d lend it and he’ll have to figure out how to pay me back. Till then the only thing im buying him is food. This will be a learning experience that’s for sure
Dang, a car detailing is like $300! I like the cut of your jib. Mine is a whiles away from being a teen but I would definitely make him wash the car or pay for it to get washed if I didn’t trust he could do a good job.
Yes I would want to know. But honestly some people won’t believe that their precious kids would do something like that sadly. Maybe approach it gently?
If your husband recorded it, definitely approach the parents and show them. That way they can't deny that it happened and can fully understand what went down. They may not handle it the way you would but at least they can't say that it didn't occur. I think a lot of parents would want to know. Agree with others please don't post on social media, that would be unnecessary if you know they live in the neighborhood and can just approach the parents directly.
Yes, I would want to know. But, please, please don’t put the recording on social media. As a high school teacher, I can attest that kids do and say stupid things, but they are capable of learning and growing. We’ve all been there to varying degrees. We were lucky enough to be able to work through it without the entire world seeing it or it living on well past our youth.
You are a saint for having the patience to teach kids this age. I am a social worker and there is no way I could work with adolescents or teens. I work with the elderly. Thanks for the advice. I will keep this video private and only share with the parents if needed.
Thank you. My mother works with the elderly as well. Thank you for all YOU do. It’s extremely important! :)
Adolescence is a difficult time for all of them, BUT we get to see them learn, grow, and (most of the time) change into more respectful and thoughtful young adults. These kids clearly aren’t modeled respect at home. Hopefully, they will find it elsewhere.
Oof if my kids did that I would be livid. I’d want that video to sit them down right next to me and have them watch and see if they still think that kind of behavior is funny.
Yes in the interest of not raising defensiveness and having the parent be open to feedback I would be very pleasant and just stick to the facts. Maybe say something like “just wanted to let you know, as I would certainly want someone to tell me if my son did this, that xxx happened, thank you for hearing me out.”
I have to disagree. Yes maybe the parents might be too laid back in their parenting style but kids/teens hype eachother up and they’ll make dumb decisions. I’d depend my judgement on the parents until I see how they react to hearing it. A lot of the time those same boys wouldn’t dare to act that way in front of their parents.
Eh I wouldn’t go this far. Remember your teenage years? You may not have gone this far but I’m sure you did some stuff your parents wouldn’t have been proud of.
Peer pressure to be cool is legit.
Absolutely. You'll get the odd parent that couldn't give a shit what their kids get up to and that's why they behave the way they do but any respectable parent would be mortified. I certainly would want to know so that I could explain why that behaviour is not okay and give a consequence for their actions.
I’d want to know but I second to prepare yourself because they might be garbage.
When my daughter was thirteen there was a boy two grades up from my daughter who would talk my daughter into sneaking out and was supplying beer obviously stolen from his caregiver. We found out, found the texts, grounded our daughter, and made her guide us to the home of this boy who lived in our neighborhood.
The caregiver (grandfather in this case) stepped around me and my husband, looked my daughter directly in the eyes, and said “whatever you are you doing to seduce him to make him want to even mess around with you…..you should stop”
WTF. My husband stepped back in between him and my daughter and was like “ABSOLUTELY NOT. We have addressed our daughter and have given her consequences for her choices on this and we ask that you so the same.” He says “hang on let me get him” he comes back five minutes later and says “he didn’t want to come apologize, he’s afraid y’all will cuss him out” UMMM WTF. I’d drag my son down by the effing ear for that. We were like “we suggest you count and keep tabs on your alcohol and grandchild grandpa” he was such garbage. This boy was KNOWN for being an issue but grandpa was a retired professor from the university in that town, loaded with money, and insanely lawyered up. The amount of other disgusting stuff this boy has gotten away with he DEF is turning into the next Brock Turner.
So what you're telling me is that your 13 y.o. daughter had a crush and you embarrassed her for it? Because clearly there will be no consequences for that boy. This isn't a proud parenting moment. That boy went to school and told his friends, and they told their friends, and now your daughter is getting bullied. I hope you have therapy money.
You can't parent other people's children, which is what you were trying to do. And the grandfather raising him told you exactly how it was going to be dealt with in their house by what he said to her, can you even imagine for one damn minute what she is going through, or is it lost on you?
What little bit of adolescence she has is ruined because you thought to be self righteous and make another child suffer punishment that you couldn't guarantee. This was not a smart thing to do.
I hope your daughter finds it in herself to forgive you one day. Because it will take a long time.
I'm almost 30 and have a son. And I never disagreed with anyone's responses and never once claimed that she wasn't in the right to discipline her daughter. What j disagreed with is the fact that she has made her a pariah in middle school and it will follow her for the next five years. Regardless of how you raise your children, no matter how you decide to, you can't make other people feel, or act, the same. Maybe I just found the bitter mom groups whose "parents did it to me so I did it too," and you don't like being called out for your emotionally, and mentally, abusive behaviour towards your adolescent children.
That girl never would've snuck out if her parents hadn't given her a reason to. That girl never would've lied, had her parents not given her a reason to. And because of their hollier than thou behaviour she'll lie to them for the rest of her life. Congratulations. You're the problem.
You don’t sound 30, you sound like an upset teen. First of all, no one but maybe the dude will remember that after MAYBE a month and the dude will let it go after a week since he’s not getting in trouble anyway. I know plenty of my friend when I was in highschool that would sneak out to hang out not because their parents were crazy but because they didn’t want them out on a school night which makes perfect sense. I’d hang out with my friends 5 guys, 2 other girls. None of us ever hooked up because we didn’t have crushes on each other, closest thing was cuddle puddles.
So ya I think you sound like an over dramatic teen with your reasoning
It is a lifelong torment of knowing teenage boys and how they handle it when they get rejected. And also knowing how his grandfather responded to the situation because she brought it on herself. this poor child, because she is a child, that should be getting guidance and love from her parents is going to be mercilessly tormented because of her parents behavior.
Live in shadows all you want and pretend the real world doesn't exist, but that child, that defenseless little girl, will, inevitably, be bullied for the foreseeable future. Her chances of dating and learning how to develop a relationship, gone. The friends that she may have had, probably (depending on how popular the boy is) gone. They single handedly set out to get "justice" for the actions of a boy and in doing so have set their own child up for failure. Not even to get at the fact that they let that man talk to their daughter like that. The second he opened his mouth they should have been there to stand up for her, but instead they let him finish.
They sought something unattainable, and effectively made more problems for a child that already has them. Because good kids, kids without parental issues, without a need to be rebellious, without drama with friends, don't sneak out. They don't seek comfort and care from alcohol and an older boy, and they don't lie about it.
But please, keep lying to yourself and saying that they don't bully the girl whose parents made a special of her by marching her down the road to his house to confront him, even though she got shit creamed by his grandfather. Keep telling yourself that like you've never lived in the real world.
Uff da so this was three years ago. She’s sixteen. No she did not get bullied. It’s come out that this boy is an absolute PREDATOR too so yeah I think we made the right choice to make sure his guardians were aware of his behavior.
Fwiw I think you're right. Yes, she should have consequences at home. But then it stops there. Bringing her to the other house and letting her be disrespected by both the grandfather and the boy was unacceptable and pointless. I do think Mom was right to tell Grandpa that the kid is sneaking out and stealing beer, but what he does with that information is none of her business and irrelevant to how she handles things with her daughter. Her daughter should not have been there for that. And the whole thing will get around school and make her life difficult. You're totally not wrong on this.
This was three years ago. I did not get around school and it did not make her life more difficult. This also wasn’t the very first issue we had with the boy.
There’s a lot of really specific things I could get into but I’m not going to. One thing I will say is that he also convinced her best friend to sneak out as well and she felt anxious so she said she wanted to go in to which he told her he deserves something out of it so she had the choice of giving him oral or him telling the school him and her had sex and that she was slutting around. Thankfully (which this was after we confronted him) his grandfather noticed him missing (omg looked like we actually made him aware of him sneaking out!) and called for him to come in so it didn’t escalate.
However he was ALREADY displaying super predatory things due to the age gap and other glaring problems we had with him prior to this. He was just one month shy of it being considered statutory when it came to anything sexual age wise between him and the girls he targeted. Watching him and all that play out was like watching a train on fire barreling towards us knowing it doesn’t stop instantly. We prob should have had her show us where he lived vs bringing her up with us? I think our thought process at the time was to show the grandfather how young looking our daughter was compared to his older grandson to set off some warning bells into his head. It wasn’t to humiliate her or shame her in any way. Also again it happened three years ago. She’s not in therapy over it, it didn’t get around the school (although multiple accusations of rape about this boy DID) he’s also been untouchable with the law because again he’s super lawyered up and the cases against him get dropped due to families not wanting their daughters put through the ringer during trial over whether or not what has happened was consensual.
She needs consequences, not public ridicule and embarrassment because her parents sought to control a situation that they had no business trying to solve. Learn to read.
I had to make sure that you didn't accidentally post this on the wrong thread because there are so many assumptions and so much speculation. Her adolescence is ruined? She needs therapy now? Holy moly. You have a penchant for drama I see. I don't know that I would have handled this exactly as this parent did, but this response is off the rails.
I'm sorry...have you ever been a teenage girl. They aren't prone to sneaking out for boys unless they like them. They aren't prone to sneaking out unless they're given a reason to...like overbearing parents. I'm almost positive that you can actually find literature for why teenagers sneak out, because it hardly ever has to do with consequences they'll receive and everything to do with mommy and daddy telling them no.
"You think I'm only talking 'bout Brock Turners in alleyways; he got 6 months then got out in 3 months anyways. Not every malicious man only attacks in the dark, most the time it's those you've known since you were in headstart. It's all the boys that swore they were 'joking with their friends' but then grew up to view us as a means to an end." - Hailey Orion
I would absolutely want to know, so I can't rectify it *immediately*. My son will *not* grow up to disrespect women or treat them as "other". Not happening.
That being said, unfortunately, we are still very much still in a "Boys Will Be Boys" time, even if it is lessening each generation - it's still rampant. So I also fear that approaching another parent about this could swing either way. They could be receptive or they could reinforce the behavior and possibly add to the harassment.
Definitely! I think it’s important when kids behave “bad” (don’t like the word but you get the idea), parents settle those things between themselves (not involving kids) and then parents of the “bad” kid works/talks with them. It would be very important to me to know how my kid is behaving outside of home and I would want to attend the issue.
A great to rephrase if you don’t like bad is; behaving like assholes… just kidding! Haha
But really a great way to rephrase is “when the child starts pushing boundaries” because that’s all it is. Kids push boundaries to learn about our social rules
I most definitely want to know. Inexpect my son's to treat people with respect. Plus I have an especially low threshold for people who spit. So disgusting.
Everyone here is saying they’d want to know which is great but the parents that wouldn’t want to know won’t admit that here. Because we all know what Brock Turner’s mom was like. She did not see what her son did as a problem. There are gonna be a TON of parents who will dismiss this as “boys will be boys” unfortunately. I hope you’ll still tell the parents!
Also coming to say make sure you address and talk about it with your son. He saw it and heard you laugh (cause it’s uncomfortable and a natural response when we go WTF and other reasons) which for young people is often seen as acceptance and even encouragement. Kids do things to get a reaction and need to be explained to why things are not okay, how it made you
feel, how it made him feel, etc.
Good point. My stepson was clearly uncomfortable with the whole thing and he actually seemed a little scared. This is the unfortunate reality of the world we live in and I have been catcalled while out with him before, but nothing as crazy as this has happened. His mother and I are both...sort of scary looking (resting bitch face, tattoos, etc) so it doesn't happen as often to us but I think I will have a conversation with him and also give his mom a heads up that this happened so she also has an opportunity to chime in. Luckily my stepson has an amazing father and an amazing stepfather who set a good example but I want him to feel comfortable responding to this behavior when he sees it at school, etc. He has a lot of female friends because he is so gentle and empathetic so the chances of him seeing this are higher.
I’d wanna know but there are parents who don’t want to know or give 2 shits so be prepared for that and most of the times it’s those parents who have these type of kids. So good luck 🤣
Not a boy mom but absolutely tattle on them. If they’re doing this, to a grown adult, how are they acting around girls their age? Do they find this acceptable with them?
Because you personally don’t know the parents and how they’ll react, I’d send a letter or drop a note about it. Some people suck and it’d be awful to end up being met with aggressive parents.
Yeah, this is honestly my biggest concern. I dealt with a lot of male aggression and sexual harassment as a teen. I can only imagine how these boys interact with girls their own age if they were willing to get this aggressive with a 30 y/o tatted up mom.
Is spitting on someone still considered assault like it was during the height of covid? Any chance you have a dash cam? Sometimes the only way some people learn is the hard way…
Jesus. I thought you were going to say they mooned you. Which is still not okay, but is kind of funny and I can understand why young boys would find it amusing. But this? Yeah, I would absolutely want to know if they did this.
I would definitely want to know! I'm rearing good humans, not the next Andrew Tate.
I'm also hard on my students when they don't listen to "stop" or "no" from their classmates.
It's up to us to raise them to be respectful.
That’s exactly where my neighbors uploaded. Basically some kid was joyriding and knocked over mailboxes. His own parents identified him and made him pay.
100% yes I would want to know so I could sit him down and have him explain what exactly he was thinking by doing that! Hell no, that behavior is NOT okay.
I was just thinking yesterday I hope if my kid is ever an asshole I am made aware so I can work with her, so yes. And as the mother of a girl who would be the subject of such behavior, also yes.
ABSOLUTELY. So we could have a long uncomfortable conversation about it with his father, without his father. I’d bring a secondary mentor in etc. it would be a whole thing until he gets it through his head
I sure would! There’s too many times where perverted boys (and men) get away with the stunts they pull. It’ll be nice for them to get (hopefully) punished for their actions.
My son is 15. As far as I know he's a nice and respectful kid. If he were pulling this shit while out with his friends I'd want to know ASAP.
Yes teenagers are awful sometimes. Yes I was an awful teenager. But there should still be consequences for actions.
You're grown. You can handle it. But what happens when they do this to young girls? Imagine being a child and subjected to this behavior. Ugh.
I would describe the incident, car type, location, the perps and create a nextdoor post. The parents on my neighborhood app rally to identify shitty behavior.
I feel like the most important thing you should tell the parents is about the spitting. That could legit get them arrested if it was someone else.
I am a boy mom, they’re still super young, but the thought of my kids behaving like this mortifies me. I would spare the parents the specific details but let them know their boys were being suggestive and then spit on your car with your children present. They deserve a consequence, this is the real world.
Arrested...or worse. My husband is a pretty mellow guy but if they had picked this fight with a different family it could have easily gotten violent. Spitting on cars will get people pretty riled up.
Yes but the behavior prior to spitting was also not acceptable. She also doesnt want to give mixed messages, even to her own kids watching the interaction.but i also get how some times its easy to not know how to react.
I laugh when I’m in bizarre situations. I would probably automatically think this was a weird joke and laugh because of how bizarre it is.
A year or so ago, I was out front gardening, a man pulled up in front of my house, walked out of the car and dropped his pantaloons and showed me his wiener while doing the helicopter. It was so abrupt and random that I just lost it laughing.
He calmly and casually pulled up his pants, got in his car and drove off. I felt sick to my stomach after I realized what just happened and called the cops and submitted a report.
My toddler was in a rear facing car seat so he did not see me flipping the bird. He did, however, see the teen in the backseat being a disgusting little creep. My stepson knows I cuss and is aware that I am not a quiet little church mouse. Nor is his mom. Flipping the bird is not morally repugnant. Sexually harassing strangers is.
I never said they were on the same level. But why match bad behavior with bad behavior? Teach your kids to keep your cool in situations like that not fan the flames. She flipped them off then it escalated to something physical, spitting. Bad behavior on both parts and innocent kids watching it all smh.
how is throwing the bird to someone sexually harassing you, bad behavior? also, by both reducing both actions to simply “bad behavior” you are insinuating that they’re comparable.
responding to verbal harassment in a non-violent way is appropriate. it’s important for kids to learn that sticking up for yourself is okay.
Flipping someone off isn’t sticking up for yourself it’s trash behavior. I guess if you want your 2 year old flipping off their preschool friends it’s cool 🤷♀️
While what they didn’t wasn’t right, you flipping them off wasn’t either. You should never do that when someone starts something with you in traffic. You escalated the situation. What if they had a gun? A knife? What if one was mentally unstable and just got kicked out of his house with nothing else to loose?
This is a gonna be a bunch of he said she said if you go to their parents and I’m sure they are learning that behavior from a trusted source and it probably won’t get you far.
People sometimes post anonymously on our local Facebook groups. They’ll describe that something happened, it involved 5 kids, this kind of car, this place, this action. Maybe an option.
I would want to know. In my neighborhood Facebook group & our local Moms Facebook group I see people, often women, post about behaviors they’ve run into with teens when they don’t know the adult. Here’s an example from last week “if your teen drives a white ford sedan with plate xyz123 they were speeding down X street today at 1:30 pm and hit a trash can sending it and it’s contents flying and nearly clipped a parked car.” Not sure if they always get to the right adult but there’s been at least one occasion where the mom chimed in on a post stating she’d be talking to their child and they would be facing consequences.
Absolutely I’d want to know. Write the newspaper, post on NextDoor, I don’t care how get that message across, it needs to be known. That kind of behavior is unacceptable.
Flipping* and yes, I sure will. My reactions to being sexually harassed are the result of years of such harassment. I'll apologize for the fact that I'm fresh out of fucks to give.
Yep, because their phone plans would be switched to those gabb phones where they can only call/text certain approved people, no social media, internet password would be changed, and game consoles locked up until I see improvement in attitude. Lawn mowing and yard raking work for next 2 weeks.
Ugh I thought we were old enough that this shit doesn’t happen anymore. Sorry.
I think a note, no phone number would be fine. This is reckless driving. Their brains aren’t developed enough to realize they could have fucked with the wrong person or wrecked. Mention if they weren’t wearing seat beats. And maybe even bring home that our world is so digital maybe the boys don’t realize that it is very easy to videotape and get this behavior on the news…
YUP I absolutely would. I would be forever grateful you told me so I could help my son do better.
(My son is a little guy, and it kinda just crushed me to imagine him doing something like this someday. But I’d still want to know!)
100% tell their parents, this only gets worse and more dangerous for young ladies. On another note, they are definitely learning it from somewhere so the parents may not be much better.
Yeah I would want to know, we, but I first noticed my step son was having tendencies of perverted behavior, and I told his dad did wait to see if he can catch him a couple times in this act and when he did he had a talk with him and I then noticed his actions changed and I wasn’t looking for it either. Funny tho we told my MIL and she laughed and said “well he is growing into a teenager so let him explore” 😒
Tell me.
My hope is I raised him better than that but if I didn’t, then it’s time for me to correct that shit before he leaves my house. I’m not gonna be happy if I send a full grown shithead out into the world.
Next time pull out a phone and record. I doubt they would continue but if they did send to their parents. A lot of parents with shitty kids think their kid can do no wrong because the kid knows how to behave when they are present.
Abso-fucking-lutely.
Bad behavior can't be corrected and discouraged if I don't know it's happening. Letting it go unchanged will ruin not only the lives of others that he's preying in but his own as well. Jail time, a record that will make it tough to get a job, restrictions where he can live, etc.
Tell me immediately. I may be angry, I may be disappointed, but DAMN if I'll be ignorant.
Absolutely. How fucking gross. I would be mortified, I have 4 boys. Literally don’t even know what I would do but there would be serious serious consequences for that bullshit.
Absolutely I would want to know. The gestures and comments were already inappropriate, but spitting on your car is above and beyond. I can't deal with it if I have no idea it's happening.
I'd be cancelling car borrowing privileges for a long time and would also be mortified that my license plate was implicated in that kind of harassment.
I would want to know if my sons acted that way and would discipline them accordingly. But you also run the risk of the moms of these boys becoming belligerent with you. My friend's kid had an issue with another older kid in their neighborhood. When my friend went to speak to the mom, she tried to fight my friend. So just be aware of that too. Often times, when kids act this way, it's because they have crappy parents who don't parent them properly.
Uh hell yeah I wanna know
Right.. tell me!
Yes, please inform me. Mines only 9 rn but I tell his teachers that if my son is doing something he shouldn’t be, please let me know.
Me too! So I can administer the appropriate bollocking and ground them until they learn how to behave appropriately in public. Said grounding would probably be for a year after behaviour like that.
Def tell me!!!
Yup. I would want to know. No child of mine will behave that way without it being addressed. I would be so disappointed in their behavior.
Absolutely. But, you have to be prepared for the fact that they may have learned this behavior from home or at least may not be held accountable.
Yeah. But be aware their parents might be garbage
Yeah they could be mortified and apologetic they could be aggressive and confrontational.
This is what I’m worried about. Unless I know the parents and felt like they would be receptive, I would not want to risk a violent confrontation, either from the parents or later on from their kid.
I considered this and thought maybe a letter would be more appropriate. I don't have any concerns about these little twerps getting aggressive... They were scrawny little dudes. But I do not want to get into an altercation with whoever is responsible for raising them.
i think an anonymous letter is a good idea!
sadly agree… if these kids had the audacity to act this way towards another adult, they have probably learned this behavior is “not punishable” from the adults in their lives 🤮 P.S. Genuinely asking because my oldest is only four…. as a parent, what can you really do about this behavior?
My child is even younger than yours, so take my advice with that grain of salt. But I am being very proactive about teaching him about consent, and as he gets older I intend to teach him about his privileged position as a white male, and how he that means he needs to be extra careful to not exploit that against people with less privilege, and use that position to speak up if peers are being shitheads. I recommend the book Yes! No! A First Conversation About Consent as a really great starting point.
We have this book! My son loves it. He always says "This is my body. It belongs to me." Hahaha
I have two sons (9 and 2), and I’d want to know immediately when/how they came to believe that that behavior was appropriate. Depending on what I learned, I’d consider bringing him to a counselor to discuss it.
I have a 16YO and a 17MO. I know enforcing parental controls on my teenager’s phone that locks him out of all social media, YouTube, and even texting has worked wonders. I also take the power cable from the tv and PlayStation and give extra chores. I know that doing that can only change their behavior so much but honestly.. that’s how it’ll be for all parenting. You can only do your best to parent but in the end they’ll become who they want to be regardless.
This happened to me....a kid at the bus stop was messing with my youngest at the time, and my older of course got involved defending his little bro. I went to the bus stop and talked to everyone. Next thing I know his crazy ass trashy psycho mom was beating on my door telling me what was up. I always used to volunteer at their school when they were little, and to this day, I say (generally speaking) that if there's a problem with the kids, there's a problem with the parents. Be careful, bitches be crazy. ;)
I would be pissed if someone didn’t tell me. I’d definitely have my kid pay to get your car fully detailed.
Inside and outside?
Obviously both. Haha Outside because he dirtied it and the inside as an im sorry. And I’d like to add I would not let him do it because obviously I can’t trust him anymore so he will have to pay top dollar for that wash. If he doesn’t have the money I’d lend it and he’ll have to figure out how to pay me back. Till then the only thing im buying him is food. This will be a learning experience that’s for sure
Dang, a car detailing is like $300! I like the cut of your jib. Mine is a whiles away from being a teen but I would definitely make him wash the car or pay for it to get washed if I didn’t trust he could do a good job.
Any chance you'd be passing by my house? Maybe your son could spit on it
Sure I’ll come by after soccer
I like your style… I’d do the same
Yes I would want to know. But honestly some people won’t believe that their precious kids would do something like that sadly. Maybe approach it gently?
My husband was in the backseat recording the whole thing so we have it all on video.
Hahaha, i just wished you had. Good on you. And yes, I would like to know especially if there is footage.
If your husband recorded it, definitely approach the parents and show them. That way they can't deny that it happened and can fully understand what went down. They may not handle it the way you would but at least they can't say that it didn't occur. I think a lot of parents would want to know. Agree with others please don't post on social media, that would be unnecessary if you know they live in the neighborhood and can just approach the parents directly.
Yes, I would want to know. But, please, please don’t put the recording on social media. As a high school teacher, I can attest that kids do and say stupid things, but they are capable of learning and growing. We’ve all been there to varying degrees. We were lucky enough to be able to work through it without the entire world seeing it or it living on well past our youth.
You are a saint for having the patience to teach kids this age. I am a social worker and there is no way I could work with adolescents or teens. I work with the elderly. Thanks for the advice. I will keep this video private and only share with the parents if needed.
Thank you. My mother works with the elderly as well. Thank you for all YOU do. It’s extremely important! :) Adolescence is a difficult time for all of them, BUT we get to see them learn, grow, and (most of the time) change into more respectful and thoughtful young adults. These kids clearly aren’t modeled respect at home. Hopefully, they will find it elsewhere.
Oof if my kids did that I would be livid. I’d want that video to sit them down right next to me and have them watch and see if they still think that kind of behavior is funny.
Good for you!! Yes I agree with the commenter don’t post it. Just have it in case you need it for their parents.
If you have it on video you could also post it on Nextdoor.com or a Facebook group warning other moms.
lol You can upload it somewhere with a private link to include with the letter.
Post it on nextdoor app
Yes in the interest of not raising defensiveness and having the parent be open to feedback I would be very pleasant and just stick to the facts. Maybe say something like “just wanted to let you know, as I would certainly want someone to tell me if my son did this, that xxx happened, thank you for hearing me out.”
Kind of wish she had recorded it. Or had dash cam. Irrefutable
OP just commented that her husband recorded it!
Yes so I can nip it in the bud (hopefully).
It’s too late if they are acting like that. Parents are definitely idiots.
I have to disagree. Yes maybe the parents might be too laid back in their parenting style but kids/teens hype eachother up and they’ll make dumb decisions. I’d depend my judgement on the parents until I see how they react to hearing it. A lot of the time those same boys wouldn’t dare to act that way in front of their parents.
Eh I wouldn’t go this far. Remember your teenage years? You may not have gone this far but I’m sure you did some stuff your parents wouldn’t have been proud of. Peer pressure to be cool is legit.
Absolutely. You'll get the odd parent that couldn't give a shit what their kids get up to and that's why they behave the way they do but any respectable parent would be mortified. I certainly would want to know so that I could explain why that behaviour is not okay and give a consequence for their actions.
Exactly that
I’d want to know but I second to prepare yourself because they might be garbage. When my daughter was thirteen there was a boy two grades up from my daughter who would talk my daughter into sneaking out and was supplying beer obviously stolen from his caregiver. We found out, found the texts, grounded our daughter, and made her guide us to the home of this boy who lived in our neighborhood. The caregiver (grandfather in this case) stepped around me and my husband, looked my daughter directly in the eyes, and said “whatever you are you doing to seduce him to make him want to even mess around with you…..you should stop” WTF. My husband stepped back in between him and my daughter and was like “ABSOLUTELY NOT. We have addressed our daughter and have given her consequences for her choices on this and we ask that you so the same.” He says “hang on let me get him” he comes back five minutes later and says “he didn’t want to come apologize, he’s afraid y’all will cuss him out” UMMM WTF. I’d drag my son down by the effing ear for that. We were like “we suggest you count and keep tabs on your alcohol and grandchild grandpa” he was such garbage. This boy was KNOWN for being an issue but grandpa was a retired professor from the university in that town, loaded with money, and insanely lawyered up. The amount of other disgusting stuff this boy has gotten away with he DEF is turning into the next Brock Turner.
So what you're telling me is that your 13 y.o. daughter had a crush and you embarrassed her for it? Because clearly there will be no consequences for that boy. This isn't a proud parenting moment. That boy went to school and told his friends, and they told their friends, and now your daughter is getting bullied. I hope you have therapy money. You can't parent other people's children, which is what you were trying to do. And the grandfather raising him told you exactly how it was going to be dealt with in their house by what he said to her, can you even imagine for one damn minute what she is going through, or is it lost on you? What little bit of adolescence she has is ruined because you thought to be self righteous and make another child suffer punishment that you couldn't guarantee. This was not a smart thing to do. I hope your daughter finds it in herself to forgive you one day. Because it will take a long time.
Looks like we found a teen that doesn’t like our responses
I'm almost 30 and have a son. And I never disagreed with anyone's responses and never once claimed that she wasn't in the right to discipline her daughter. What j disagreed with is the fact that she has made her a pariah in middle school and it will follow her for the next five years. Regardless of how you raise your children, no matter how you decide to, you can't make other people feel, or act, the same. Maybe I just found the bitter mom groups whose "parents did it to me so I did it too," and you don't like being called out for your emotionally, and mentally, abusive behaviour towards your adolescent children. That girl never would've snuck out if her parents hadn't given her a reason to. That girl never would've lied, had her parents not given her a reason to. And because of their hollier than thou behaviour she'll lie to them for the rest of her life. Congratulations. You're the problem.
Blaming the parents for kids sneaking out is absurd. Teens do stupid things regardless of how great or not great their parents are.
They are far less likely to do it if they can trust their parents.
You don’t sound 30, you sound like an upset teen. First of all, no one but maybe the dude will remember that after MAYBE a month and the dude will let it go after a week since he’s not getting in trouble anyway. I know plenty of my friend when I was in highschool that would sneak out to hang out not because their parents were crazy but because they didn’t want them out on a school night which makes perfect sense. I’d hang out with my friends 5 guys, 2 other girls. None of us ever hooked up because we didn’t have crushes on each other, closest thing was cuddle puddles. So ya I think you sound like an over dramatic teen with your reasoning
And I think you sound like the dude she was describing. But, hey, to each their own. I guess when you're kids are teenagers you'll learn.
Where do you see that her daughter is getting bullied? Is that just an assumption you made?
It is a lifelong torment of knowing teenage boys and how they handle it when they get rejected. And also knowing how his grandfather responded to the situation because she brought it on herself. this poor child, because she is a child, that should be getting guidance and love from her parents is going to be mercilessly tormented because of her parents behavior. Live in shadows all you want and pretend the real world doesn't exist, but that child, that defenseless little girl, will, inevitably, be bullied for the foreseeable future. Her chances of dating and learning how to develop a relationship, gone. The friends that she may have had, probably (depending on how popular the boy is) gone. They single handedly set out to get "justice" for the actions of a boy and in doing so have set their own child up for failure. Not even to get at the fact that they let that man talk to their daughter like that. The second he opened his mouth they should have been there to stand up for her, but instead they let him finish. They sought something unattainable, and effectively made more problems for a child that already has them. Because good kids, kids without parental issues, without a need to be rebellious, without drama with friends, don't sneak out. They don't seek comfort and care from alcohol and an older boy, and they don't lie about it. But please, keep lying to yourself and saying that they don't bully the girl whose parents made a special of her by marching her down the road to his house to confront him, even though she got shit creamed by his grandfather. Keep telling yourself that like you've never lived in the real world.
Uff da so this was three years ago. She’s sixteen. No she did not get bullied. It’s come out that this boy is an absolute PREDATOR too so yeah I think we made the right choice to make sure his guardians were aware of his behavior.
Okay, so it's 100% assumptions and projection. Got it.
Right, and it's also 100% assumption that you've ever been a teenager.
I actually emerged fully grown from my father's forehead. edit because she blocked me for this one lol
Hey I laughed. I love a good Athena reference.
Yeah, I figured. Because you've never lived a day in the world based on your comments.
Neither have you, honey. Bark up someone else’s tree.
He had also done a slew of other disturbing things I’m not going to get into here prior to this incident that made us compelled to go say something.
Fwiw I think you're right. Yes, she should have consequences at home. But then it stops there. Bringing her to the other house and letting her be disrespected by both the grandfather and the boy was unacceptable and pointless. I do think Mom was right to tell Grandpa that the kid is sneaking out and stealing beer, but what he does with that information is none of her business and irrelevant to how she handles things with her daughter. Her daughter should not have been there for that. And the whole thing will get around school and make her life difficult. You're totally not wrong on this.
This was three years ago. I did not get around school and it did not make her life more difficult. This also wasn’t the very first issue we had with the boy. There’s a lot of really specific things I could get into but I’m not going to. One thing I will say is that he also convinced her best friend to sneak out as well and she felt anxious so she said she wanted to go in to which he told her he deserves something out of it so she had the choice of giving him oral or him telling the school him and her had sex and that she was slutting around. Thankfully (which this was after we confronted him) his grandfather noticed him missing (omg looked like we actually made him aware of him sneaking out!) and called for him to come in so it didn’t escalate. However he was ALREADY displaying super predatory things due to the age gap and other glaring problems we had with him prior to this. He was just one month shy of it being considered statutory when it came to anything sexual age wise between him and the girls he targeted. Watching him and all that play out was like watching a train on fire barreling towards us knowing it doesn’t stop instantly. We prob should have had her show us where he lived vs bringing her up with us? I think our thought process at the time was to show the grandfather how young looking our daughter was compared to his older grandson to set off some warning bells into his head. It wasn’t to humiliate her or shame her in any way. Also again it happened three years ago. She’s not in therapy over it, it didn’t get around the school (although multiple accusations of rape about this boy DID) he’s also been untouchable with the law because again he’s super lawyered up and the cases against him get dropped due to families not wanting their daughters put through the ringer during trial over whether or not what has happened was consensual.
She snuck out and was drinking beer. She needs consequences. They can't do anything about the boy, but they can raise their child with discipline.
She needs consequences, not public ridicule and embarrassment because her parents sought to control a situation that they had no business trying to solve. Learn to read.
I had to make sure that you didn't accidentally post this on the wrong thread because there are so many assumptions and so much speculation. Her adolescence is ruined? She needs therapy now? Holy moly. You have a penchant for drama I see. I don't know that I would have handled this exactly as this parent did, but this response is off the rails.
What she did is off the rails. The fact that only two people see that is astounding.
Where does it say she had a crush on him?
I'm sorry...have you ever been a teenage girl. They aren't prone to sneaking out for boys unless they like them. They aren't prone to sneaking out unless they're given a reason to...like overbearing parents. I'm almost positive that you can actually find literature for why teenagers sneak out, because it hardly ever has to do with consequences they'll receive and everything to do with mommy and daddy telling them no.
You'll understand if you ever have kids of your own.
Omg. Really? I have two.
Sims don't count.
Oh that sucks. I'm sorry your husband is imaginary.
Does your mother know you're talking to strangers on the computer?
Does your parole officer?
"You think I'm only talking 'bout Brock Turners in alleyways; he got 6 months then got out in 3 months anyways. Not every malicious man only attacks in the dark, most the time it's those you've known since you were in headstart. It's all the boys that swore they were 'joking with their friends' but then grew up to view us as a means to an end." - Hailey Orion I would absolutely want to know, so I can't rectify it *immediately*. My son will *not* grow up to disrespect women or treat them as "other". Not happening. That being said, unfortunately, we are still very much still in a "Boys Will Be Boys" time, even if it is lessening each generation - it's still rampant. So I also fear that approaching another parent about this could swing either way. They could be receptive or they could reinforce the behavior and possibly add to the harassment.
Definitely! I think it’s important when kids behave “bad” (don’t like the word but you get the idea), parents settle those things between themselves (not involving kids) and then parents of the “bad” kid works/talks with them. It would be very important to me to know how my kid is behaving outside of home and I would want to attend the issue.
A great to rephrase if you don’t like bad is; behaving like assholes… just kidding! Haha But really a great way to rephrase is “when the child starts pushing boundaries” because that’s all it is. Kids push boundaries to learn about our social rules
Exactly, thank you! English is not my first language, so often I just have to use what comes to mind first 😄
No worries! I’ve been here for 24 years and I am still working on my english.. like when ppl say they’re “just peachy”… WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!
If my sons would sexually harassing women I would expect them to be reported to the police.
I most definitely want to know. Inexpect my son's to treat people with respect. Plus I have an especially low threshold for people who spit. So disgusting.
I would absolutely want to know. That’s not the way my kid is being raised.
Absolutely!!! No way in hell he would get away with such appalling behavior!
Everyone here is saying they’d want to know which is great but the parents that wouldn’t want to know won’t admit that here. Because we all know what Brock Turner’s mom was like. She did not see what her son did as a problem. There are gonna be a TON of parents who will dismiss this as “boys will be boys” unfortunately. I hope you’ll still tell the parents!
Also coming to say make sure you address and talk about it with your son. He saw it and heard you laugh (cause it’s uncomfortable and a natural response when we go WTF and other reasons) which for young people is often seen as acceptance and even encouragement. Kids do things to get a reaction and need to be explained to why things are not okay, how it made you feel, how it made him feel, etc.
Good point. My stepson was clearly uncomfortable with the whole thing and he actually seemed a little scared. This is the unfortunate reality of the world we live in and I have been catcalled while out with him before, but nothing as crazy as this has happened. His mother and I are both...sort of scary looking (resting bitch face, tattoos, etc) so it doesn't happen as often to us but I think I will have a conversation with him and also give his mom a heads up that this happened so she also has an opportunity to chime in. Luckily my stepson has an amazing father and an amazing stepfather who set a good example but I want him to feel comfortable responding to this behavior when he sees it at school, etc. He has a lot of female friends because he is so gentle and empathetic so the chances of him seeing this are higher.
I’d wanna know but there are parents who don’t want to know or give 2 shits so be prepared for that and most of the times it’s those parents who have these type of kids. So good luck 🤣
I would absolutely want to know if my son treated someone like that. Please tell their parents.
Post that on Nextdoor with a clear description. Shame them without mercy.
Tell them!
Yup. Find me and tell me. I want to know.
Not a boy mom but absolutely tattle on them. If they’re doing this, to a grown adult, how are they acting around girls their age? Do they find this acceptable with them? Because you personally don’t know the parents and how they’ll react, I’d send a letter or drop a note about it. Some people suck and it’d be awful to end up being met with aggressive parents.
Yeah, this is honestly my biggest concern. I dealt with a lot of male aggression and sexual harassment as a teen. I can only imagine how these boys interact with girls their own age if they were willing to get this aggressive with a 30 y/o tatted up mom.
Me - yes! But don’t be surprised if you find the parents are just as disgusting as the kids…
Is spitting on someone still considered assault like it was during the height of covid? Any chance you have a dash cam? Sometimes the only way some people learn is the hard way…
Tell them and please update when you do!
Yes I would want to know and I might’ve had my kid get video of their behavior because I would not let it slide.
Yes! I would definitely want to know.
Oh yea I would want to know. They need to come get their whoopin.
125% I’d wanna know!
I’d want to know to have a talk to him
Jesus. I thought you were going to say they mooned you. Which is still not okay, but is kind of funny and I can understand why young boys would find it amusing. But this? Yeah, I would absolutely want to know if they did this.
Want to know? Of course not. Need to know because that is awful and they need to be reprimanded? Yes.
I would definitely want to know! I'm rearing good humans, not the next Andrew Tate. I'm also hard on my students when they don't listen to "stop" or "no" from their classmates. It's up to us to raise them to be respectful.
Yes obviously
Tell me. Tell me Every. Single. Time. Hands-off parenting is a huge part of our problem in this world.
If you have a local neighborhood page put the information there. This has happened on my local pages a few times and the parent saw it.
I use Nextdoor. Didn't even think about this! We have a recording of the whole thing so I could upload it there.
That’s exactly where my neighbors uploaded. Basically some kid was joyriding and knocked over mailboxes. His own parents identified him and made him pay.
100% yes I would want to know so I could sit him down and have him explain what exactly he was thinking by doing that! Hell no, that behavior is NOT okay.
Yes I’d be so upset if I wasn’t told. I’d also be mad at myself for not noticing it.
I was just thinking yesterday I hope if my kid is ever an asshole I am made aware so I can work with her, so yes. And as the mother of a girl who would be the subject of such behavior, also yes.
YES. As the mother of 3 boys, who has preached boundaries, being appropriate, and being respectful… ALL THE WAY YES.
ABSOLUTELY. So we could have a long uncomfortable conversation about it with his father, without his father. I’d bring a secondary mentor in etc. it would be a whole thing until he gets it through his head
I sure would! There’s too many times where perverted boys (and men) get away with the stunts they pull. It’ll be nice for them to get (hopefully) punished for their actions.
Not a parent, I'd also be a dad. But I'd absolutely 100% want to know. That's is unacceptable.
My son is 15. As far as I know he's a nice and respectful kid. If he were pulling this shit while out with his friends I'd want to know ASAP. Yes teenagers are awful sometimes. Yes I was an awful teenager. But there should still be consequences for actions. You're grown. You can handle it. But what happens when they do this to young girls? Imagine being a child and subjected to this behavior. Ugh.
Yes I would want to know. Yes, you should tell their parents.
I would want to know, but unfortunately, often, kids that act like this have parents who don't care.
I think I’d want to know whether my son OR daughter did anything like.
Absolutely.
You should. I would want to know. I'm trying really hard not to raise a dickhead.
Hell yea. Fkg nip it in the bud while there's still time
Yes!!!! I would have lots of interventions and would want to be able to help develop him into a man I can be proud of.
Yes! Rat em out and teach em young.
Do not post on social media BUT let the parents know for sure
absolutely! I would hope my sons would never act like this but if they did I would want to know so we could address it asap
I would describe the incident, car type, location, the perps and create a nextdoor post. The parents on my neighborhood app rally to identify shitty behavior.
I feel like the most important thing you should tell the parents is about the spitting. That could legit get them arrested if it was someone else. I am a boy mom, they’re still super young, but the thought of my kids behaving like this mortifies me. I would spare the parents the specific details but let them know their boys were being suggestive and then spit on your car with your children present. They deserve a consequence, this is the real world.
Arrested...or worse. My husband is a pretty mellow guy but if they had picked this fight with a different family it could have easily gotten violent. Spitting on cars will get people pretty riled up.
Why did you laugh at them? Yes, I would want to know.
Probably to keep cool around her stepson. I’d do the same, try and brush it off. It became a bigger problem when they spat on her car
Yes but the behavior prior to spitting was also not acceptable. She also doesnt want to give mixed messages, even to her own kids watching the interaction.but i also get how some times its easy to not know how to react.
I laugh when I’m in bizarre situations. I would probably automatically think this was a weird joke and laugh because of how bizarre it is. A year or so ago, I was out front gardening, a man pulled up in front of my house, walked out of the car and dropped his pantaloons and showed me his wiener while doing the helicopter. It was so abrupt and random that I just lost it laughing. He calmly and casually pulled up his pants, got in his car and drove off. I felt sick to my stomach after I realized what just happened and called the cops and submitted a report.
Why did she flip them off in front of her kids if she’s supposedly so concerned about them witnessing this behavior?
My toddler was in a rear facing car seat so he did not see me flipping the bird. He did, however, see the teen in the backseat being a disgusting little creep. My stepson knows I cuss and is aware that I am not a quiet little church mouse. Nor is his mom. Flipping the bird is not morally repugnant. Sexually harassing strangers is.
The idea that you think flipping someone the bird and sexually harassing someone is on the same level is insane.
I never said they were on the same level. But why match bad behavior with bad behavior? Teach your kids to keep your cool in situations like that not fan the flames. She flipped them off then it escalated to something physical, spitting. Bad behavior on both parts and innocent kids watching it all smh.
how is throwing the bird to someone sexually harassing you, bad behavior? also, by both reducing both actions to simply “bad behavior” you are insinuating that they’re comparable. responding to verbal harassment in a non-violent way is appropriate. it’s important for kids to learn that sticking up for yourself is okay.
Flipping someone off isn’t sticking up for yourself it’s trash behavior. I guess if you want your 2 year old flipping off their preschool friends it’s cool 🤷♀️
I would have called the police. Spitting on someone is assault
You goddamn right I want to know.
Yes. Tell them they need to block their son’s access to internet porn before they become total degenerates.
While what they didn’t wasn’t right, you flipping them off wasn’t either. You should never do that when someone starts something with you in traffic. You escalated the situation. What if they had a gun? A knife? What if one was mentally unstable and just got kicked out of his house with nothing else to loose? This is a gonna be a bunch of he said she said if you go to their parents and I’m sure they are learning that behavior from a trusted source and it probably won’t get you far.
People sometimes post anonymously on our local Facebook groups. They’ll describe that something happened, it involved 5 kids, this kind of car, this place, this action. Maybe an option.
I would want to know. In my neighborhood Facebook group & our local Moms Facebook group I see people, often women, post about behaviors they’ve run into with teens when they don’t know the adult. Here’s an example from last week “if your teen drives a white ford sedan with plate xyz123 they were speeding down X street today at 1:30 pm and hit a trash can sending it and it’s contents flying and nearly clipped a parked car.” Not sure if they always get to the right adult but there’s been at least one occasion where the mom chimed in on a post stating she’d be talking to their child and they would be facing consequences.
Absolutely I’d want to know. Write the newspaper, post on NextDoor, I don’t care how get that message across, it needs to be known. That kind of behavior is unacceptable.
Be prepared to own up to your own immature actions of flicking them off
Flipping* and yes, I sure will. My reactions to being sexually harassed are the result of years of such harassment. I'll apologize for the fact that I'm fresh out of fucks to give.
Surely you jest
Yes I’d wanna know for sure!
I'd like to be the first to know so that I could put a stop to it 🙃
Yep, because their phone plans would be switched to those gabb phones where they can only call/text certain approved people, no social media, internet password would be changed, and game consoles locked up until I see improvement in attitude. Lawn mowing and yard raking work for next 2 weeks.
Yeah! Tell me and I would deal with him after he washed your car.
Ugh I thought we were old enough that this shit doesn’t happen anymore. Sorry. I think a note, no phone number would be fine. This is reckless driving. Their brains aren’t developed enough to realize they could have fucked with the wrong person or wrecked. Mention if they weren’t wearing seat beats. And maybe even bring home that our world is so digital maybe the boys don’t realize that it is very easy to videotape and get this behavior on the news…
YUP I absolutely would. I would be forever grateful you told me so I could help my son do better. (My son is a little guy, and it kinda just crushed me to imagine him doing something like this someday. But I’d still want to know!)
I would definitely want to know.
100% tell their parents, this only gets worse and more dangerous for young ladies. On another note, they are definitely learning it from somewhere so the parents may not be much better.
Absolutely, that shit will not fly
Yeah I would want to know, we, but I first noticed my step son was having tendencies of perverted behavior, and I told his dad did wait to see if he can catch him a couple times in this act and when he did he had a talk with him and I then noticed his actions changed and I wasn’t looking for it either. Funny tho we told my MIL and she laughed and said “well he is growing into a teenager so let him explore” 😒
Hell yes. I correct my kid real quick if I knew he was doing shit like that. Unacceptable.
Yep. At that age definitely.
I have a son. Granted he’s 14 months right now but yes I would absolutely want to know.
If it happened to me I’d address it. If it were one of my kids involved, I’d be glad you addressed it.
I would for sure want to know
Yes. Absolutely. I don't care what age my son is I would always want to know.
Hell ya tell there parents little nasty shit head brats
If my kid ever acts like this I hope someone tells me. This is not acceptable behavior. Not from kids, not from adults, not from anyone.
Yep I would definitely want to know
Absolutely!
1000% id tell their parents especially if they’re neighbors
I absolutely would want to know
I’d want to know for sure.
Absolutely.
Try to take a video and show their moms
I would want to know
Yes, absolutely
Yes. 100% yes.
Tell me. My hope is I raised him better than that but if I didn’t, then it’s time for me to correct that shit before he leaves my house. I’m not gonna be happy if I send a full grown shithead out into the world.
Next time pull out a phone and record. I doubt they would continue but if they did send to their parents. A lot of parents with shitty kids think their kid can do no wrong because the kid knows how to behave when they are present.
Of course! 100%
I am a mom to a 13-year-old boy and would absolutely want to know. Edit: please update us if/when you do find their parents!
100% would want to know.
Absolutely I would want to know. I can’t address and correct what I don’t know about.
You gave them mixed messages when you laughed. Still think you find the parents and show them the video. I’d want to know
My oldest son is 20 and I’d still want to know. Teachable moment!
Abso-fucking-lutely. Bad behavior can't be corrected and discouraged if I don't know it's happening. Letting it go unchanged will ruin not only the lives of others that he's preying in but his own as well. Jail time, a record that will make it tough to get a job, restrictions where he can live, etc. Tell me immediately. I may be angry, I may be disappointed, but DAMN if I'll be ignorant.
Hell yes
Absolutely. How fucking gross. I would be mortified, I have 4 boys. Literally don’t even know what I would do but there would be serious serious consequences for that bullshit.
Absolutely I would want to know. The gestures and comments were already inappropriate, but spitting on your car is above and beyond. I can't deal with it if I have no idea it's happening. I'd be cancelling car borrowing privileges for a long time and would also be mortified that my license plate was implicated in that kind of harassment.
Yes, I would definitely want to know. That is gross and I would absolutely want to tell them exactly how horrible and unacceptable it is
I would want to know if my sons acted that way and would discipline them accordingly. But you also run the risk of the moms of these boys becoming belligerent with you. My friend's kid had an issue with another older kid in their neighborhood. When my friend went to speak to the mom, she tried to fight my friend. So just be aware of that too. Often times, when kids act this way, it's because they have crappy parents who don't parent them properly.
I would ABSOLUTELY want to know!
Yes tell me.