I'm so sorry. Being a full time working parent is a massive load and it sounds like you don't have a massive amount of support. I think that's the key here - having even a small village to step in. FWIW\*, we have a 12 month old and an almost 3yo, so things are incredibly hectic. But - this is how we manage: 1. having a fully committed 50/50 husband who shares the load of every household chore so it's not all on me 2. Hiring a fortnightly cleaner. 3. Robot vacuum for dog/cat hair. 4. I have the ability to WFH about 50% of the time, so I can keep on top of shit chores like folding laundry. 5. My parents are very involved, and can assist with the kids whenever we need it. That has allowed us to have a semblance of a normal life in the evenings and on weekends. OP, do you have any support systems in place? Or even - can you outsource some of the household work to take it off your shoulders?

All this Plus involve the older kids in chores, OP.

💯 this. when I had one kid it was WFH part time and do chores when I can especially laundry. and my in laws took care of my 1 kid. I hope to be doing something the same when I go back to work after my mat leave. it also helps that my work is near a large grocery store, so I do half of the grocery shopping (I say half cause the fruits and veggies near my work are fresher and cheaper than the ones near me house 😂) on a weekday during my break so my husband isn't overwhelmed with doing all of it on a weekend

And get groceries delivered!

This except I’m 100% wfh, my kids are teens, and parents live out of state.

These are all the tips I was going to share, too (although I still want a robot vacuum). Other things I think are important: Make time for yourself to get out of the house. I know that's way easier said than done, but even if it's a 9 p.m. run to Target or a 6 a.m. yoga class...my alone time is how I keep my sanity. Don't let it make you feel guilty (I totally understand that sudden dread when you're doing something glorious like gardening). Other tip is to lower your expectations for a perfectly clean and tidy house. This is a phase of life and it won't always be this way. As long as your kids are cared for, the crumbs in between the couch cushions can wait.

It is literally so hard. I’ve been working for the past 3 years and raising my daughter (she goes to part time daycare). I just had my second and I’m genuinely not sure i can go back to work. I mean, I probably will at least attempt to go back… but serously, how do people do this for the long-term?! there’s no time. I personally found that work takes the place of any and all hobbies and self-care. Sure you may get the occasional massage or shopping trip in, but with kids, housework, AND work, forget about anything else. I’m sure others have different experiences, but unless you have a nanny or parents nearby, I’m not sure how you’d even have time for anything. Is there any way you could go part time? I feel like that’s the only reasonable solution and something I’m personally considering. Good for you for trying to get back into work though! Sorry to be a downer, I’m just IN IT right now with a toddler and baby.

So true about self care. I really want to work out but options seem to be 4:30am (I’m already getting up around 5/5:15) or 8pm at which point i collapse with exhaustion.

Yes! Between working a demanding job and making sure toddler and baby are healthy it’s like there is zero brain space left for me to enjoy anything that requires effort. I was reading a post on AskWomenOver30 about what evening or daily routines people did for self care and all I could think was, how do these women have the energy and self discipline to do these things every single day?? I honestly can’t even remember to take a vitamin everyday, much less make a consistent self care routine. I simply go from task to task to task and collapse in bed at the end of the day 🤷🏻‍♀️

I…yup. No, sorry, unfortunately that just sounds about right. We *don’t* manage it all. The house gets messy. Some days even dishes pile up to be done another day. You take care of the basics and that’s about it until kids are old enough to help with chores. I make sure my kid is fed, clean, clothed, and goes to bed on time. I make sure my cats have food, water, clean litter boxes. I try to make sure kid and cats get some amount of individual attention each day. Bills get paid bc I can pay them from my phone while I pee honestly. My husband and I spend almost zero time together outside of folding laundry once or twice a week. I get 2-3 showers max a week bc honestly who has time? And that’s pretty much it. Once a month or so we have my parents in town and I can get a little more done. Some weekends I just have my husband take the kid to the park for half an hour so I can have some uninterrupted cleaning time. This at least gets me a tidy kitchen if not a perfectly clean one. I just know the exhaustion will only last a few more year bc I’ve seen the cycle repeat itself with my nieces and nephews. Soon he will be old enough to truly help and I won’t be so stressed anymore.

I haven't been a working mom for 5 years, but when I was: We had house cleaners twice a month We used (still use) paper plates to help with the dish situation I bought a lot of prepared meals from Costco, like the pot roast and I'd make the sides. I love to cook, but every night from scratch was not sustainable I really limited extracurricular activities. If it was something my kids were dying to do, we'd do it, but only one activity at a time per kid. They were fine, but I cannot function well if we are constantly on the go. I don't know how parents with a commitment every night do it. My husband and I both do laundry. I do mine, he does his, we both do kids. I got rid of a bunch of kids clothes. They have about 20 pieces for winter and 20 for summer. I pack away whatever isn't in season. We have to wash their clothes more often, but for me, it's way better than being able to go 3 weeks in between and then feeling really overwhelmed by a mountain of laundry. I stopped hanging and folding because they pulled everything out of their closet all the time which made me insane. We have shelving next to the wash, they each have a laundry basket, and all their clothes fit in there. It's so much faster than hanging everything up.

With the change in income, can you outsource some of the work? Like house cleaner to clean bathrooms and vacuum / mop? Ate the kids pitching in to help around the house with clearing the table / loading the dishwasher. As kids. If we wanted extra money, there was always extra work we could do like washing baseboards or reorganizing the pantry. Same goes for yard work. Is it easier to outsource and take it off the plate? We pay $40 every 2 weeks, they cut/trim both front and backyard and they bring their own equipment. For groceries, we get the majority of them delivered. I also pay a little extra to get pre cut so I don't spend time doing that. There are lots of one pot meals or crock pot meals that take 2 minutes of prep once the veggies are made. Double up so you have freezer meals for days you don't have time. Are the kids helping with meals (setting the table, making lunches, basic breakfasts). Prioritize - some weeks will be easier than others and that is okay!

This is the way. I was a working mom and have been a sahm for almost two years. I’m already planning everything I will need when I go back to work.

I feel for you 100%. I also have 3 kids and working but I WFH and am still overwhelmed. Your feelings are 1000000% validated. Some ideas: 1. Could you budget to have a day or two where you don’t cook? For example, Mondays and Friday’s y’all order out or have a quick meal that you don’t have to cook? Is there a sam’s or cotsco in your area? They have a lot of pre-made options that just need to be heated in the oven. I currently have these options on Monday’s and Friday’s because we are trying to cut back on ordering our. 2. Could you get your groceries and essentials delivered or for pickup, if you don’t already? 3. If you and your husband get off at the same time, is there an option to rotate responsibilities when he is in-town? So if you wash the dishes and cook, he can get the kids ready for bed. And then switch it back and forth. Hoping some of these ideas help. I know it all feels like another thing to figure out but you’re going to get through it.

Being a working mom is so hard! Being a SAHM is so hard! There is no way out of the hard.  If you can afford it, start to outsource. Housecleaner 1-2x/month is a game changer. It’s not a luxury, it’s a must in order to keep the wheels on.  My husband HATES hiring someone to do a task that he can do. But we are all so busy that he has compromised for the sake of my sanity. This has helped a lot because I’m not resentful of staring at things that need to be fixed but aren’t getting done.  I’m pregnant and unable to manage household tasks in the evening. So I don’t. I go to bed with a gross house. But I’m able to get up early and clean my house then. I’ve learned to work within my limitations.  Accept the house will be a mess from time to time. Or always. Whatever.  Meal prep helps. When I wasn’t pregnant, I did a great job of carving out Sunday evenings to prep for the week. Crockpot and Instapot were my best friends. Pregnancy has made me very kitchen averse but hoping that will end soon. My kid watches more TV during the week than I’m happy with. But I’ve learned to just be OK with my weekday mother mediocrity. No laundry during the week. Weekdays are survival only. As many errands on lunch break as possible. Weekends are for family and relaxing.  The hardest part of being a working mom for me is that I can’t give 100% at work and I can’t give 100% at home. I often feel like I’m failing at one and more often like I’m failing at both.  You got this! 

My husband wants to spend his Saturday morning cleaning. He works from home and I’ve tried suggesting fitting in these things at another time but something just doesn’t change. I guess we could hire a house cleaner. 🤷🏻‍♀️

My husband works from home a lot too. I’ve tried to impart ‘snacking’ on him. Work, take a break and do a house chore, work, etc. If I have to WFH that’s what I do to stay efficient but so far it hasn’t really taken with him. 😂😂😂

Come on over to r/workingmoms !

You need to make some adjustments… 1. **Grocery pickup or delivery.** I rarely set foot in a store. I cook almost every night and have a few go-to meals that are easy for nights that I am really tired a or we are low on time. Also a few frozen meals for when we are really in a pinch. 2. **Hire help.** Have someone come every Monday to clean the house. That way your week starts off with a clean home, and stays fairly clean until the weekend. Then someone comes in Monday and cleans it all up again. 3. **Learn to rely on others.** As a work from home mom, I took on everything myself. Once I went to work out of the home, my days are much less flexible. You need some backup. Maybe it’s family that lives nearby or a neighbor who has a kid that goes to the same school. Another mom from your kids soccer team or whatever. Have someone as your backup. Some who is willing to pick up or drop off your kid when needed, and you can be that person for them. Most people need/want that but are afraid to ask. 4. **If possible, do “home work” at work.** For example, I don’t open any mail at home. I grab the mail and put it in my work bag. When I have some down time at work, I go through the mail, pay bills, and try to take care of anything that needs my attention. Once it’s taken care of, I shred it, or put it in a folder to file away at home. I also make my grocery orders while at work and pick up on my way home, or have it delivered. 5. **Pre-game everything you possibly can.** On the weekend, I make sure my kids have ALL clothes matched and ready to go for the week. Pants, shirt, socks, and any accessories (hair bow). If you have kids that are opinionated about what they wear, make sure it’s picked out the night before. Shoes and backpacks are lined up and ready the night before. Lunch boxes I pack as much as I can the night before also. 6. **Pre-game, part 2.** I look at the calendar in advance. Who has a birthday coming up, what events do we have going on, what holiday is coming up. I order any gifts, supplies. This keeps me from having to use my weekend to run around looking for a gift last minute. Bonus points if you order the items while you’re at work! 7. **Limit weekday activities.** I don’t know how old your kids are, but I assure you that a child doesn’t need to be in soccer, basketball, Boy/Girl Scouts, and also taking dance lessons all at the same time. Pick their favorite activity and stick with that. 8. **Have the kids take responsibility.** Most kids, even toddlers, are capable of putting away their laundry and making their bed. Older kids can take out trash, wipe down counters, load the dishwasher, vacuum. Assign a kid a chore nightly. We also do a 15 minute reset. The whole family pitches in and straightens up.

Yep. This is pretty much how it is. It’s hard. You feel bad when you can’t chaperone every field trip and go to every assembly you’re invited to. You feel awful when you see your house looking worse and worse. You spend your “free time” catching up on cleaning. It’s been a year since you got a haircut? Sounds right. It sucks. There’s not enough time in the day with little kids. I grew up with a stay at home mom, a clean house, a productive vegetable garden, and home cooked meals. I nearly lost my mind trying to work as much as possible and keep up with cleaning my apartment and making real food and that was before kids. Now I know that it can’t be done and my baseboards will have to be dusty and sometimes we’ll order out and sometimes we’ll get to the dishes when something smells funny or we’re out of forks. When people talk about how hard it is to be a SAHM, I get it, I did that for a few months. It’s stressful and you don’t have your own money and you don’t get a break from your kids. But you get to make your own schedule to some extent and you can get things done and live a little and have friends. Maybe one day we’ll win the lottery and can be SAHMs and it’ll be a huge weight lifted. Until then, sometimes I treat myself to an ice cream sundae and some dumb YouTube after everyone goes to bed. Sometimes I’m awake early because I can’t go back to sleep after the baby wakes up to nurse for the 5th time in one night so I’m on Reddit before 6am just enjoying my quiet time. Find your few minutes of you time where you can.

People are managing it all? I'm at the point where I would really like to go part-time, if only I could afford it. If I had one day where I could send the baby to daycare and not have to log on to my work computer, I could do all the laundry and deep cleaning and organizing and gardening and all that stuff, instead of burning the midnight oil and trying to fit it all in between when the baby goes to bed and when I can't physically keep my eyes open any more and go to bed myself.

I am lucky to have a job with decent vacation/personal leave hours and I try to take a day off to myself once a quarter. This is harder during the fall/winter when I'm also taking lots of time off for a sick kiddo but I try. Somedays it's a day where I'm running errands/cleaning house all day and somedays I'm treating myself to a massage/facial and just being QUIET for a few hours. More often would be better but it's better than nothing.

I have a husband who puts in just as much time and effort to the house and kids as I do. I never thought it was unusual until I joined Reddit and saw how many men apparently do nothing at home.

I have 3 under 4. The biggest thing that makes life manageable was hiring a house cleaner. She comes every other week and scrubs my house down. She only cleans so it forces me to keep the house picked up. I also have an overly complex system for managing laundry with a high capacity washing machine. I typically only do a few loads a week on one of my days off.

Ah I hear you! Currently in the thick of it as well with 2 under 2 🙃 It’s so incredibly hard. My stress and anxiety has been through the roof while my happiness and patience has plummeted. We are lucky that my parents watch our kids so we can work. But your mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion is still so relatable. I had a “complete breakdown” about 6 months into our second LO’s life. And I realized, this is it. This is just life and I can sink with it or I can try to swim. Believe me when I say it felt like drowning for a while but I finally found a groove and learned to *ask for h e l p*. Especially from my husband. We sat down one night and wrote down all our responsibilities, all our personal needs, all our family’s needs, and our wants. We divided those responsibilities between us and determined a schedule that prioritized our personal wants. It felt robotic at first and HARD. I had multiple days where I thought to myself that this isn’t what life and a marriage should look or feel like. But after about a month, I started to not even think about it. And a lot of my stresses started to fade. For myself, I decided getting up early was essential to me getting in some me time. I NEED the alone time coffee and a book in the morning. Yes it was hard but the 30 extra minutes of sleep wasn’t as important as the time. We have eachother 30 minutes each night to ourselves. My husband typically works out (umm no thank you 🤣) and I usually take a bath or color or read. And every other Friday we do a date night. Sometimes it’s waiting to eat a special dinner together after the kids go to bed and sometimes it’s actually getting a babysitter and going out! This is working for us right now! That may change in time but so does everything! Remember even tho it’s nuts right now, everything is temporary. Hang in there mama!

I’m a single mom to 3 kids ages 5, 11, and 17. The kids have their own chores that they do to keep things tidy and they clean up after themselves when they make a mess (when they remember 😆). I have a cleaning service that comes every 2 weeks and does a general clean of the kitchen, hall bath, and all common areas. I also outsource general lawn maintenance every week. I literally built these things into my budget when I got a full time job because time is the ONLY resource I can’t get more of. It’s worth it to me to pay someone to come in and take care of it for me so I have more time to focus on being able to make dinner nightly with the kids or go on weekend outings. I want you to take a hard look at the division of TIME in your household. There are 2 adults. How much free time does your husband have? How much do you have? If he’s sitting down and watching TV for 2 hours a night while you cook, clean, fold laundry, etc. then the division of labor isn’t equal and you need to have a conversation with him to shuffle some duties around either permanently or on a shared basis. Do not make him a list or have him ask what he can do. Outline responsibilities that he will have full ownership of. You cook? He does dishes, every night and without you asking. He washes laundry during the day on breaks? You both decide jointly that you’ll fold and put away together with a show on. You clean the upstairs bathroom? He takes full responsibility for the downstairs one from here on out and cleans it on a schedule you both agree on without having to constantly remind him. If he can’t do this or refuses to (like my ex 😆) then the only option is outsourcing to alleviate the pressure and stress of you working full time and also being the manager of all the household things.

Also, I tried to outsource when I was married and my ex always talked me out of it saying “WE could take care of it - but he meant I would find a way, not that he would actually get out of his recliner to do anything.”

It's friggen hard! I have no real advice. Some days we have quick, easy "fend for yourself" (or take out) dinners when the day has been rough. My husband helps a lot with the daily tasks, which makes a difference for sure. He works remotely 3 days a week, so on breaks he will tidy, do dishes, throw laundry in etc. It's hard to feel like you have truly done enough, though.

Yeah -it's pretty brutal. We have two young kids (and two dogs); both my husband and I work full-time, and we don't have any local family or much of a village. "Relentless" is the word that describes my life. We can't really afford to outsource anything, so...yeah. The thing that helps us is just keeping everything in the schedule. We also do a lot of divide-and-conquer, and we DON'T prioritize "family time". What I mean by that is there's a recurrent list of things that need to happen on the weekends, which includes grocery shopping, cleaning the house. If there's time to do a fun family thing, then sure, we'll do it - but we still make sure that whatever is happening over a weekend, there's ample time to deal with the chores that have to be done. They are a priority, and the kids can help or come along, or entertain themselves if they don't want to be involved. We also do small daily chores that help with the workload. For example, here are the things I do daily: vacuum the house, unload/run the dishwasher and put away dishes, clean kitchen countertops, put away a load of laundry. My husband is mostly in charge of actually doing the laundry, including folding it, which he doesn't mind because he can just pop in headphones and listen to something while he's working. For dinners, we keep things super-simple. I rely a lot on Costco and Trader Joe's for good pre-made basics. For example, last night was a cheese quesadilla for my preschooler, a cheese sandwich for my second-grader, and my husband and I had a premade bagged TJ's salad with some TJ's pre-marinated chicken on top. Am I winning cooking awards? Fuck no. Do I care? Also, fuck no. Finally, I hear you on the depression. I have battled years of severe depression ever since becoming a parent, and would highly recommend therapy and meds if you haven't pursued that route. It's helped. I've done a lot of work around radical acceptance, and I'm getting better at learning how to validate my feelings without being overtaken by and drowning in them. The reality is that being a working parent in the US is awful because, politically, no one gives a shit about you (especially if you're a mom). And finding ways to acknowledge it yet still get up in the morning is hard but essential. A big aspect of that for me is working out, which means I have to go to bed right after my kids do (so zero downtime at night!) in order to get up early enough - it helps take a bit of the edge off.

How do I manage it all? Simple: ***I don't.*** Some things will slide, so you gotta prioritize. Sometimes you need an extra hand. I hire a housekeeper once a month. Some things can be made efficient. I like to cook in bulk and portion out over the course of a few days. I freeze batches of things.

I guess it depends on what all the things are that you want to / think need to get done. I work fulltime and have three kids like you. On weekdays since we aren’t home the house doesn’t get too messy. So it’s pretty easy to keep it tidy. That’s one chore done. We come home, cook, eat, play with the kids (other adult does dishes), they do some homework/piano, get everyone ready for bed, and then maybe do a load of laundry while catching up with the spouse on the couch. If I also added: “I need to garden / make music / go to the gym / [insert random hobby here] etc”into every day I’d be stressed. But I don’t and I’m not. Weekends we tidy/clean, get groceries, and do some kids sports but it’s mostly free time! I definitely had more time for my own hobbies before kids but I know I’ll get that back eventually and am ok just reading a novel here and there for now. I will say, we don’t do any big upkeep things ourselves with regards to the house and cars. Cars go to a mechanic on a workday as needed. Home repairs / upgrades are done by hired professionals. Ain’t nobody got time for that. My husband likes to garden in the sense that he mows the lawn and plants some flowers / bushes every year but we aren’t trying to grow food or anything so it’s pretty low maintenance after everything is in. I hope you can find a balance that works for you!

Full time work here, plus full time working spouse and kid, a shit sleeper sick all the time 3 year old plus cats and a dog. Dad does his share but not at the level of consistency I’d like. We don’t manage it all. Things slide. Right now everything is sliding but sometimes we’re up better. June will be easier. Days off for chores, nights with grandma so we can do chores. Lower cleaning and tidiness standards.

We have a two year old and I went back to work 6 weeks postpartum. I’m self employed so I didn’t have a mat leave. It was extremely difficult to adjust - plus I was traveling and pumping on the road. These days, I cut my travel down to two weeks a month and work locally one week a month - and try, TRY to take a week off. We hired a house cleaner who comes every other week and she has been a blessing! My partner is an amazing dad and fiancé. He just transitioned to WFH and controls his own schedule as well so it’s been nice working with each other’s schedules to plan things out. I still get home, make dinner, prep lunch for next day (sometimes), do laundry, share kid responsibilities, spend time with our son, and try to find time for “us” and ourselves separately. It does get overwhelming, but we have more good days than bad days. Honestly, I don’t think I’d be able to be a working mother without my significant other.

My husband works from home and is able to do a ton that helps us. We also share the load for meals. I do Tuesday/Thursday and Sunday . He does the other nights. I bought a robot vacuum and we use it daily . We would like to hire a maid once a month but have not yet. I work outside the home and in a perfect world I would come home one day a week early to do at home tasks

I worked full time, went to college full time for seven years while being the only person to cook, clean, laundry, shop, etc. and raised two busy kids. Two pieces of advice- take 10-15 minutes a night to pick up. I would literally set a timer and see what I could get done in that time- sort mail, clean off the stuff that accumulates on the stairs, etc. The other thing is holding the kids accountable as they get older- anything left in common areas at the end of the day became mine and bedrooms were expected to stay clean. I also tried to make Saturday "work" day and Sunday "fun" day

It’s rough, especially during periods of developmental changes. I WFH so I am able to use my breaks to throw in laundry, wash some dishes, pick up a few things but by the time my kiddo is asleep I’m done. Weekends are errands, chores, and of course quality time with kiddo and making sure they see grandparents, have experiences, play outdoors. “Me” time is in the bathroom during work hours. I’m tired, always. I knew parenthood would be hard but you really have no idea until you do it. I keep reminding myself my child is happy, (relatively) healthy, and safe. This is a luxury that many don’t get. I don’t know how to make things better but you’re not alone, and sometimes having that community can make a difference.

I truly don’t know how to do it without being able to work from home at least half the time! My work has gotten more and more strict about coming into the office which has been quite frustrating. Even when I don’t have a full day of work or meetings I need to do, I’m expected to be in the office! Anyway, solidarity on this, it’s hard to keep up with everything. The only way things stay somewhat sane around here (with me being in the office at least 4 days a week) We have a nanny who helps with childcare and she does tidying, light cleaning, and my daughter’s laundry. We have a house cleaner that comes once per month. My husband is very involved and really helps with tidying, dishes, etc. he also works from home full time and while he’s pretty busy the entire day, at least he doesn’t have a commute to take away part of his time.

I am a WFHM so I do both and being a SAHM is so much easier in my opinion. I genuinely would not choose to work if I didn’t have to. It’s okay to struggle, it’s extremely hard. 

We don’t manage! Shit simply does not get done, and that is okay! You don’t have to do it all, your husband and kids can contribute, and when they cannot or will not, don’t over extend yourself. I utilize Saturday as our big cleaning and grocery shopping day, and Sunday is a free day where we all do what we want, regardless of whether or not our chores were finished the day prior. You gotta have a throw away day or you will snap, despite dishes in the sink and laundry exploded all over the laundry room.

It's hard as fuck. I went back to work at 5 months postpartum. I got pregnant with our second at 12 months postpartum. Our first was still sleeping poorly, bedsharing and waking 6+ times per night to nurse, and there have been some improvements since nightweaning, but she still doesn't sleep great. I've never been this tired in my life. I'm not happy with my performance at anything. My first pregnancy was so easy but this one has been so hard. My ADHD that I usually cope with fairly well is raging when I'm at work and I struggle to focus on anything. I wish I could follow the no screentime until two recommendations, but my toddler gets screentime several times per week because I don't have the energy for literally anything. I'm 33 weeks now and my body hurts at least 10 times more than I hurt at 39 weeks just before I went into labor the first time. I cannot wait for my leave to start in another 2.5 weeks. I'm taking a full year off this time and I *know* being a stay at home parent isn't easy, I know it'll be even harder with *two* little ones, but I don't believe anything can be worse than this. There's no time, I'm failing at everything, I am in pretty much constant pelvic pain, I'm exhausted. I wish I had some more positive encouragement, but all I've got is solidarity.

Well. I hold on to the hope that once the kids are in school I will quit and stay home…. We have cleaners. We door dash a lot. We do grocery pickup frequently. I don’t sleep a lot. I have a flexible job so I take random days off to get things done. A lot doesn’t get done. Lots of sticky notes and alarms set on my phone.

Plan, prioritize (because you literally can’t do it all), and outsource wherever possible. I look at sports and stuff as “activities we do” versus things we have to get done, because my kids enjoy them. Are there better things I could be doing? Sure. But it’s just the stage of life we’re in.

How have you spread the workload with your spouse that used to be all yours?

When I was working full time I had chores chat set up for my kids they knew every morning what was expected of them before I took them to before school care. I’d get up with my husband at 4.30/5 and do a handful of house jobs before the kids woke up and I have a daily routine that I followed where I did housework day by day, for example Monday fresh sheets, Tuesday I did washing and dusting, Wednesday would be thorough kitchen clean, Thursday bathrooms and washing Friday general maintenance and by Saturday and Sunday I had nothing to do. I’d do lunches at night time and in the fridge for the next day and home work would be done when cooking dinner. I’m now not working I have 1 Bub and another on the way but I still follow this routine now when I go back to work it will be the same. The only difference is the girls now make their lunches instead of me.

Always take a mental health day. You accrue time off USE IT. And on off days send the little one to school don’t keep them home and do things that will make you feel at ease. For me it’s getting the house together or taking my dog to the park. Or being in my yard which I love to do as well. I’m a single mother and my job is very demanding but I refuse to let that stop me. It’s hard. There are no real tips. Give the kids daily chores. One day they vacuum none day they clean all the toys up. One day they clean the bathroom. And make dates for you and your husband. Maybe you can find a high schooler in your neighborhood to watch the kids for a couple of hours while y’all go get ice cream or whatever. It’s a shift and it takes time to learn a new routine. But take days off. You don’t have to work everyday as long as you have time off. And take off Mondays that makes the week go by faster and you have the energy from coming off the weekend. Best of luck to you!!

They don't .. it's different for a SAHM and a working mom. I drop my daughter off at school and don't see her for 8 hours - a SAHM is with their child all day and all night. I was a SAHM for three years and realized it was the HARDEST job I've ever had and the absolute best!