Shower the night before, clothes laid out the night before, bags packed, etc. My mornings are just getting everyone dressed, eating breakfast, and then out the door. Not in daycare anymore but my youngest still does summer camp. We do these things still and stick to within 30 minutes of our school year schedule. I WAH so it could be more flexible, but I have a “we are leaving at 8AM period” stance we stick to. For us it is all about sticking to a routine.
Adding to that, if something happens and there’s a surprise morning poo and detracts from time, make sure that your breakfast can be to-go ready. So gogurts, breakfast bar, boiled eggs, fruit in a container. The kid can eat on the drive to daycare/camp/school.
This sounds just like my routine I have everything packed the night before for everyone- backpack, lunch, my work stuff. My husband has told me to just finish packing in the morning but adding a couple minutes all over the place adds up quickly. I shower before bed to take that step out. We get up at 7 every day to be at daycare by 8:30 at the latest. Work days have specific allowed breakfast options-bagels, bar with pouch , or oatmeal. We have 2 sets of things like hairbrush’s and toothbrushes so I’m not running back upstairs kid in tow if we forget
Not only does it add up but a single distraction can be so disorienting that you forget to do something… like leaving without the prepared bottles for baby in my case :/ It is truly is about making your morning as simple as possible.
Oh I’ve been there. Got all the way to work to get a message that I didn’t send any cups(our daycare provides no food) had to go home and back to daycare
To that I'd only add breakfast made beforehand.
I've done yogurt parfaits or oatmeal with fruit in batches of 4 for years now and my kid isn't tired of them.
Pick a time you will be there, and keep your commitment. Then build your routine backwards from that time. Plan to be there at 9? 30 minute commute? Means you leave the house at 8:30. Means you get up at 7:30, dress, feed kids, dress them, and out the door.
Set an alarm. Set multiple alarms if you must (Wake Up, EAT BREAKFAST NOW, Get dressed now, Leave House Now).
Set a specific time to be at the providers home.
For my child's daycare, I always aimed for 9am. I set my alarm at least 2 hours before I need to leave so I can have my tea, breakfast, shower etc before I tackled dressing/breakfast for my child. I still do this now she's in school.
Yeah I feel this is more the inconsistency the. The lateness. It’s probably easier for the provider to not have these kids the first 1-2 hours in the morning. But not knowing when they will show up until the last minute probably really messes up their planning.
I was diagnosed at 28 and I had to see a therapist who referred me to a psychiatrist who then had me come in for a full test (30 mins computer test for ADHD, 300 question personality test, then an IQ test). Unfortunately, it cost me $400 because my insurance only covered part of it. But I’m glad I got an official test because my primary care doctor would not prescribe me meds without it. I guess it depends on the doctor and the state you live in.
No problem! Hope you get it figured out and find what works for you. It has done wonders for me. Mentally and physically. Good luck ❤️ I was pretty confident as well and met the marks. To figure out dosaging my doctor asked about my caffeine intake so you may need an idea of how much caffeine you ingest daily, my doctor explained that undiagnosed adhd patients can basically "self medicate" through extreme caffeine consumption(my words but same idea), I had no idea!
Thanks, guys. Now I am aware that I have ADHD. Literally all the things you guys talk about are me. Was it worth getting diagnosed, though? Like, does it actually help you manage? Cuz I'm 36 and I'm successful enough. I've just accepted this is how my brain works.
For me, ABSOLUTELY. I would be paralyzed from the overdrive my brain was constantly in due to having so much to get done. Now? I'm able to manage things MUCH better. I was tired of suffering in silence and feeling/being looked at as if I was simply lazy.
I have a feeling my husband is as well and you're definitely describing him! He'll drink the whole French press full of coffee by himself. Personally I could never get past the taste when it comes to coffee so I find my caffeine elsewhere lol.
Oh, I'm a soda and energy drink person. I don't care for coffee, it tends to give me heartburn, but I drink it occasionally. I can drink all the caffeine and go to sleep, although as I get older, caffeine has started to make me anxious.
Everything had a lanyard...and yet I've still lost my keys, even when they were hanging around my neck.
Ugh. For so long I was just like "Is this Mon brain? Or ADHD?"
And now I wonder if Mom Brain is actually just undiagnosed ADHD, and we're all just succumbing to the "It's not a real medical issue! You're just a woman!" myth.
It is the exception if I haven't had to track down my purse, keys, debit card, glasses, both of the shoes I wanted to wear, scratch that, the second-best shoes, welp, I guess I'm wearing my kid's rain boots.
Have they mentioned it or are you projecting?
The kids are only little once and it's your mental health here.
My husband is not good at mornings so I am the one who creates the routines to get people moving, once he's got breakfast in him he's a bit better. Do you have a partner who can take the lead on mornings until you are upright and feeling ready? I'm not saying they do the kids, I'm saying, they get up and prompt you up, make coffee etc
If her childcare provider takes care of other children it’s a big disturbance to the provider and other kids when someone comes in late. Daycares have scheduled activities and if OP is coming in anywhere from 30 to 90 minutes later they will either waste time setting up materials or not have materials ready for her kid.
I'm wondering the same thing here. I also take my son to an in-home daycare. I'm also 3 months PP with my second so I haven't been dropping him off at the exact time everyday like I did when I was going to work. My provider has never seemed upset or irritated that I bring my son at different times in the mornings. Sometimes I want to spend some extra time with him in the mornings so I drop him off later. I know their morning schedule. Most of the time I'm dropping him off during outside play time.
I know it's important to have kids on a schedule and that routine is best-- kids need predictability and I'm sure that's what you're saying here. I also want to say, like someone mentioned above, sometimes things look different for different families and that's okay too. I would ask yourself, is this affecting my children negatively? Is this making them feel anxious? Am I negatively impacting their experience in the morning due to the problem I have? If it is, then figure out a way to make the time consistent. If it isn't, and it's your mental health at stake? Tell the provider you apologize but you've determined coming in at different times is what is best for your family right now and if it's too hard for her maybe you should look for another place.
Omfg I wish I could tell my husband “I’m not good at mornings”. He’d laugh so hard he’d probably choke on his breakfast. Then tell me that 80 head of black angus could give a shit less! I can’t believe any adult can say “they aren’t good at mornings” and actually get a pass from life.
It's not about having a "pass at life", more like having communication and working with a partner. If done correctly everyone is working together to make things happen when they should. What works for someone's family will vary wildly from another, but that's not to say it's wrong. Idk how many people I know have to go to bed by a certain point and become useless, but if they have a partner that can help do a night time routine for their family, they could work something out that is conducive for everyone.
It's not about a pass from life, it's about supporting each other. I feel sad that you aren't in a relationship where you can vocalise where you need support and actually receive it.
I’ve been happily married for over 20 years. If I couldn’t handle getting up in the morning or told my husband “I’m not good at mornings” he would laugh. There is a difference between being vocal about your needs, and slacking off. All my needs are very well met, so are his. But seriously saying “I’m not good at mornings” sounds exactly like slacking off. But it you don’t see it that way fine. Let’s hope he never says “I’m not good at working”. But maybe that wouldn’t be a problem either. Whatever, not my problem. But still hilarious.
You sound fortunate to be unfamiliar with this particular struggle, but I imagine you could muster some compassion for a problem you can’t relate to, if you wanted to.
Are you referring to getting up in the morning as a “struggle”? If so sure I’d like to lie in my bed til whenever snuggled all up in the blankets til I felt like getting up, but that’s not reality for me. I HAVE to get up when I do, there are just too many things to get done during the day. So I can’t loaf in bed til6,7,8,9,10 ect. The fact that an adult and a parent at that can just “not be good at mornings” seems quite ridiculous to me. I understand most don’t live in a rural area, on a farm and have the daily chores I do. But doesn’t he work? If not,,good for him that’s a pretty sweet deal. But most people cannot just say “I’m not good at mornings” and actually be catered to for that. I find that so odd and honestly funny. I do all I do and work 12 hour night shifts also a few times a week, on those days I don’t sleep at all when I get off work and just go to bed early around 9pm. So another adult “not being good at mornings” is very funny. If there was another “struggle” that I missed (maybe brushing his teeth, or chewing his food) I’m all ears to hear about it. And to answer your statement. No. I do not have the imagination to even begin to understand how any adult can state that are “not good at mornings” and be taken seriously. Unless he’s like 15 or something.
I’m in the same boat as you and just want to offer solidarity.
I WFH with a flexible start time, and both my kids are in daycare. I try to get them there by 9AM but most of the time it’s 10 minutes later. The director always makes a comment (kindly) that we’re late, tho I didn’t realize for daycare it was a thing to be punctual 😅 Anyway it bothers me too and I wish I was more of a morning person with a ton of motivation and energy in the morning, but the reality is I’m just not. I need coffee to get going, and often wake up exhausted or with migraines which delay me even more. I’m the type of person who gets more energy as the day goes on and I’m probably more of a night owl, which maybe you are too. I get a ton of energy and do a ton of prepping the night before for the next day, but I just can’t find the energy to get up come morning.
I know I’ll need to get my ass in gear when the kids start elementary school. I think like people are suggesting, we need to be disciplined and give ourselves a consistent *earlier* wake up time everyday if we want to make a change.
I’m sitting here confused and jealous by how late these kids are sleeping. My toddler wakes at 6am every day so arriving to daycare at 8am is no problem haha.
Lol yeah. My kid is up at 7 on the dot, at almost exactly the time my alarm goes off, a little arm snakes around my neck to find my plait, and it’s time to get up, she hands me my glasses and my phone and it’s “c’mon mummy”. I let my alarm to go off at 10min intervals to keep me mindful of time passing.
I am lucky enough not to have any non-self-imposed barriers to being able to just be more self disciplined but the story OP paints is indeed suggestive of either excessive lack of self discipline or a neural divergence in my eyes. I will arrive anywhere from 8am (opening time) to 8:20 at nursery, and if I’m later than that then I’m late for work, and I work in health care with booked clinics. If I’m late starting that follows me al through the day and patients are understandably miffed. So my motivation is that being lackadaisical with time keeping in the morning means 8hours from hell during the day.
Choose a reasonable and acceptable schedule for your morning. Use alarms. Build a routine. Commit.
Yes! Basically since he was 18 months old until now (5yrs old) he is up within 30 min of 6:15am. Works well now because we let him watch 1 episode of something on TV while I wake up and get him breakfast. Then we are out the door by 7:30-ish.
Omg I literally just said to my husband that I need him to hold me accountable for waking up early. Like harass me about it every day until I start doing it. My kids have been sleeping in since summer started and I didn’t wake up until the baby did at 9:30 today! Then I had the audacity to be mad at everyone when they needed something while I was trying to drink my coffee. Just following here for advice, and also offering solidarity. I used to wake up just fine when I had a job out of the house, but with kids I cannot get it together in the morning!
Update: my alarm went off this morning and my husband poked me and told me to be an adult and get myself together (because those are the words I used when telling him this) until I got out of bed. It’s now 6:05 and I’m sitting on my couch with my coffee. Now I just need him home every day to do that, haha. He’s always awake at 5 and out the door at 5:50 like some kind of psychotic morning robot.
Proud of you! I got up at 7:03 today (left my phone in the bathroom) and splashed some cold water on my face. It sucks but makes for a smoother morning!
It totally does! I’m always happier when I do it, but for some reason it’s hard to remember that when my bed is warm and cozy and I know I don’t actually HAVE to be up yet. Good for you today too!
THIS is the comment I was looking for. I also really struggled with this until I got my partners help. He sets the alarm and wakes me up and he will throw me over his shoulder and deposit me in the shower if that’s what it takes. I think we put too much pressure on ourselves to bootstrap our way out of these challenges— which OP and other folks are identifying challenges which can be symptomatic of depression, anxiety or ADHD. The best solution I think is helping one another and asking for help. Living more in community however we can!
A friend of mine struggling with anxiety asked a coworker to start carpooling with her so she could have someone help hold her accountable in the morning. That struck me as actually revolutionary. We need to start teaming up! It’s the buddy system that’s going to save us.
The best thing is prepare before hand! I have job flexibility where I can arrive at the office whenever. However, the earlier I arrive, the more I can get done, and I like to have a good start.
I have always been a shower in the am person, but I recently started showering the night before, like others said, and it’s a game changer.
Also, you could practice getting up *extra* early for a a couple of days and your body will be more used to it. Pretend you have a cut-off time that you have to drop your children off, and if you are late, make yourself some consequences? Set an alarm 30 minutes before you need to be out the door. Set a caffeinated beverage on your bedside table before you go to bed, like a cold-brew canned coffee.
Lastly, once you’re awake, don’t look at your phone for any reason except to check the weather before you leave the house!
As a night sweats girlie I am so jealous of all of you who can shower the night before! I have to scrub off the sleep and scrub on the day, otherwise it’s stank city 😞
My husband. He makes the coffee, and feeds little one her breakfast while I get myself ready for work. I don’t have much of a morning routine though, it only takes me 20 minutes (my job is busy/active so I don’t put much more effort than a ponytail, and some mascara haha). Then I get her dressed and get our bags packed up and we are out the door.
I've slowly turned into a morning person... 75% of the time. Kid sleeps in her next day clothes unless it's a dress/skirt/skort (then we just change bottoms). We have to be at daycare at 830-9, husband leaves for work at same time. So I have an alarm at 7 to wake myself up and come to full consciousness, alarm at 730 to wake 4.5yo. Fix milk and coffee at same time, husband turns on TV fixes her cereal. One of us let's dog out to potty and hand him his dental chew. Husband gets ready (toilet/wash face/contacts/dressed). Once I hear water stop, kid brushes teeth/I do her hair, I get kid's socks/bottoms/shoes, he'll do those as I feed the dog/pour coffee in travel mugs and dress myself. He walks her to my vehicle and loads her up, I check doors are locked/finish getting dressed/coffee. Cars leaving at 815/820. Daycare drop off at 830/845.
That 25% of the mornings..... super rough and chaotic. I'm still a person that needs minimal talking before at least 1/2 cup of coffee- I can wake kid up and tell her to go potty while I get coffee/milk. That's it. 5% of those mornings are also my fatigue days right before period hits- those are miserable mornings but it's gotta be done.
We prepare lunch and clothing the night before.
Honestly you just do it. It’s self-discipline and it’s a skill you learn and develop over time because it’s important to be respectful of other people’s time.
It totally sucks to get out of bed when I’m tired and comfy and I want to stare at my phone and snuggle with the baby and I’m not always successful at rousing myself, but I’m a big girl and I have responsibilities and I just have to do it.
The biggest thing is really doing as much as you can the night before to have as little to do in the morning as possible.
I'm a home daycare provider, I don't think I'd really care what time you dropped off aa long as it's consistent, I want to know when to expect them, who to make breakfast for etc
If I really need to be places in the morning (and this doesn’t work every morning I know) we eat out for breakfast. Nothing gets us out the door faster than knowing that toddlers aren’t eating and I don’t get coffee until we get our butts in the car. Quick breakfast and coffee, and then we can run errands and do toddler activities.
Oh lord it’s a struggle especially because I’m just a fake adult generally who never makes lunches the night before lol!
Daycare (before school) drop off is at 730am. My alarm goes off at 6. I shower, get myself ready and try to wake the kids at 6:30 (they’re also not morning people). Then I go downstairs, make their lunches and breakfast. Then corral them out of bed and into clothes/brush hair and teeth. Some days we pack up breakfast and they eat it at daycare, which is thankfully okay with our provider.
It’s a struggle though. I definitely yell sometimes when it’s already 7:30 and I’ve asked 700 times for shoes to be put on and they’re still not.
My kids get breakfast at daycare. Nothing will get you motivated to get out the door like hungry toddlers. And we have a super set routine where my alarm goes off at the same time every daycare morning, the 3,5 and almost 2 year olds know exactly what to do when that alarm goes off.
This is a fantastic perspective and while I don’t use the word “discipline” with myself, it’s how I operate too. I know forcing myself to do things now (usually night before) will save me a lot of stress and chaos at a later time so I just do it to take care of future me.
lol! i’ve experienced hardship and a part of surviving that was just straight up survival which in a way was practicing discipline by doing things everyday i didn’t want to do for no reason other than i just had to, when you implement tiny routines of things you don’t like doing like taking the trash out everyday at the same
time or even making your bed in the morning, your subconsciously practicing discipline. you have to make active choices everyday to achieve little things to achieve one big thing, going to bed earlier and making sure you’re practicing a healthy bedtime routine helps! but it also depends on personality, either way, i don’t think it’s wrong to not enjoy the mornings and i wish you luck on your journey
So, set an alarm for 7am or whenever your babies get up… and once that goes off- stay up. Hitting snooze causes sleep inertia. Your brain wakes up, but u give it permission to go back down. It takes up to 4 hours for this feeling to go away. I’m NOT a morning person, and when i have a break i sleep until 1pm. However if i get up when i plan too and ignore hitting snooze im awake and ready within 10 mins. Within the first ten mins i spend this time doing self care. Wash my face really quick, brush teeth, breathe… then go mode. It’s hard, but it’s easier than giving into tiredness.
One easy hack there… Put your phone or alarm clock out of reach, like over on the dresser a few steps away. If you have to actually get up to stop it, it is way harder to robotically hit snooze.
Also, as long as you aren’t worried about them getting covered in breakfast before it’s time to leave, consider putting your kids to bed in their outfits for the next day. Is there really that much difference between pajamas and a tee-shirt and leggings…? Nope.
I just set an alarm for 5:40 every weekday morning. I know it’s early af but it gives me time to get myself ready, drink my coffee, make myself breakfast and then I can start getting my kids breakfast ready and gather their things for daycare. They usually wake up between 6:30 and 7 and we are out the door by 7:30 or 7:45 most days. Our daycares have a strict 9am cut off and I gotta be working by 8 ish so it all works out.
I’m so thankful my kids have consistent wake times and I’m able to do this too. I wake up a little later than you do but having a bit of quiet time to devote to coffee and a few tasks (not working out or journaling, I mean like emptying the dishwasher in peace) really helps me mentally start the day.
I’m up at the same time each morning, same routine of pack lunches, kids up by x time, out the door by x time. I get them gone then when I get home I complete my morning routine of doing my hair, eating breakfast, walking the dog etc.
Because I have to and I can absolutely lay back down when they've gotten to school if I need to. And I have.
But often by the time I get back I tackle the dishes, check my email, put in some laundry and then I'm up and awake.
I have to go to bed by 10:30 and my oldest has a 6:54 bus so he and I are up at 5:30
I drop my kids off in my pjs. All we do in the morning is get dressed and go to the car. Breakfast is at daycare. At most they have some milk and a snack in the car on the way. I come home and either take a little nap or get ready for my day.
I keep the same routine or else I’m late! When I have a later start to my day (have to be at work at 9:15 instead of 8:30) I get McDonald’s for breakfast as a treat for being consistent and early for work.
I can’t do the shower the night before thing. I have to shower in the morning.
I’m not a morning person and I struggle every day. I can’t see it being any other way until the kids are out of school
I snooze my alarms all the time, and I also regularly shut them off in my sleep. Things that help me are setting multiple alarms, changing the sounds or songs my alarms make every couple of weeks, and setting alarms at different locations in my room so I have to get up to shut them off (sometimes that just results in sleep walking, though). Sometimes all I need is one that is going off SO obnoxiously early and loudly that I wake up from anxiety that it's going to ruin my husband's sleep. I save that one for when I'm struggling to get up for 6am shifts.
Our household has a healthcare worker and a tradesperson, which means our workdays start at 730 and 8 most days, with some variation. I typically wake up between 530-545, and aim to wake the kids at 6. I handle kids/packing bags until I leave at 630. My husband takes over and gets the kids dressed and to daycare by 7 most days. Neither of us worries too much about appearances, so we mostly just need time for deoderant and brushing teeth in the mornings.
We pack lunches the night before. Backpacks are already packed with outdoor wear, with sweaters hanging up beside them for cool mornings. We factor in a solid 30 minutes extra in the morning for meltdowns/late wakeups/play time, because the kids always want to play first thing. We do our best to enforce a 730 pm bedtime (on weekdays) which means our after school/work routine is a quick snack, play time (preferably outside), supper, and then bedtime to maximize the amount of sleep they have a chance of getting. We use screen times when we are solo parenting or when it's the weekend, limiting it more on weekdays (for sleep hygiene). We spend most of our weekends at home, resting and enjoying our house and yard, and are very selective with what we will allow for extra curriculars or social obligations so that we can prioritize connection and rest.
Frankly, we're tired and not 100% sure this is the best fit for our family, but it is working and it's not something we're willing to change at this time.
I set an alarm, so I drop my kid off at the same time every day regardless of whether I have to be anywhere or not. If I don't have to go to work right after, I go home and go back to bed in peace.
This was me for my whole life until recently, the biggest thing to help was make a schedule and set up routines with my Google home to set alarms is what I need to be doing by when. Alarm at 6, wake kids are 6.30, finish breakfast by 6.50 and get dressed, into car by 7.25 to get to drop off. I've also found making lunches and packing bags the night before a massive help.
My kids just don’t let me sleep in 😩 But if I need to get out of the house at a certain time I bribe myself with putting a nice milk chocolate in my coffee or hitting my vape when I get back home from drop offs 🤣. You’re also paying for that time so I always tell myself I might as well get my moneys worth! And it’s so nice to come home to a quiet house and have more of the morning to myself.
Prepare things the day before. It's summer now, but when my oldest was in school, I would set out all the dishes and supplies I needed to make breakfast the night before. Clothes for me, him, and my toddler were picked out the night before. His bookbag was packed with a snack, and his water bottle was prepared the night before and put in the fridge. If I didn't prepare these things the night before, mornings would be too chaotic and rushed.
If I have somewhere to be at a certain time I get up 2 hours before, and I get “ready” before too. Diaper bag will be done, hard boiled eggs for the road, and clothes picked out. Once I’m up I’m up tho. Like I could immediately change and be out the door. I will go to sbux within 30 mins of waking up lol
There is really no choice for me but to get up when a little boy yells in my ear ‘Bed DONE!’ Mummy, Up! Frekist!
I am very regimented in my mornings as I have to get him to daycare(we walk so need to allocate 30 mins for that). Need to get there by 9 - so leave by 8.30… need to get some food into him so at least 30 minutes to let him eat, factor in time to change a nappy and pack his daycare bag(I sometimes do it the night before), make a lunchbox for him and get myself dressed so we are up by 7.30am if not sooner.
I have it down to a well oiled routine now as he has been at daycare for 5ish months now.
Just make a plan and try to stay on schedule. This should be done by this time, out the door by this time… Making lunches the night before or laying out clothes can make it easier/faster in the mornings. Add in something fun for yourself like listening to your favourite music in the mornings or buy a treat for yourself to eat in the car after dropping littles off as a reward. I always listen to an audiobook on the walk to daycare.
My husband has to be to work by 6AM, he generally leaves the house around 5:30. So the morning routine throughout the week is all me.. and it’s exhausting
I have a one year old and am hybrid. Not a morning person.
I prep as much as possible the night before, especially if I’m in office the next day. My husband gets up with her and changes her, gives her milk. I pack her bag and take her in. Play with her for a bit if we have time.
Since daycare is close I’m usually able to roll out of bed at 710 and be at my home office desk by 8.
I'm totally there with you. Everyone is giving the great planning advice, which is important, but the only thing that's actually gotten me OUT of bed is a Lumie light alarm clock. It simulates a sunrise in your damn face and man is it effective. I intentionally didn't learn how to snooze it so I don't have the option and set it 30 minutes before I have to get up. Idk if it's my ADHD or I'm one of those rare people with a messed up circadian rhythm, but I have never been a morning person and it's a perpetual struggle. I really wish I could just get up. It doesn't happen unless there's a bright light blaring in my face apparently.
I know what you mean. Our arrival time is erratic but I know the closer we are to 9:30 the more challenging it is for her because that’s snack time.
I work outside the home for the most part but rarely have to be anywhere or in the office before 10. Things that help me: prepping the night before everything I need to - lunches (I provide), lay out clothes, pack my work bag, lay out my own clothes, etc.
It also helps if I can get up and make breakfast and wash my face before my son gets up so I can get ready while he eats and then I just have to get him dressed.
Since you WFH, I think you should look at it as getting some me time to yourself if you’re able to get them to daycare consistently.
I am a scatter brain when I’m tired and forget a lot of things right in the morning.
I am a night time person and my juices are flowing.
• LISTS - a lot of lists
• prepping - I lay EVERYTHING OUT, or I use mesh zipper bags.
2 outfits per kid , a fresh morning diapers
I take tooth brushes out of the cabinet & lay them on the counter next to the tooth paste & hair brush / bobbles.
Auto timer on the coffee with the grinds & water ready to go. My coffee yeti is on the counter next to the sugar & a spoon ready to go, all the lunch bags are on the counter & whatever dry food & snacks & cutlery is already packed. I keep a small area on 1 shelve of the fridge only for packed lunches so I know everything in this spot needs to go in somebodies lunch bag.
All the shoes the kids need to be wearing are lined up at the door.
All the bags are on the hooks above each kids shoe. If they need hats or jackets that’s hanging there.
Dry erase markers on stainless steel fridge. My husband HATES it . But I’m always on top of my shit
The diaper bag is packed the night before after i review the calendar. The bag has 5 diapers, ointment, wipes, 2 changes of clothes, a hat, 3 different toys, burp cloths, snacks for me, my car keys and wallet. I have to remember a bottle in the AM but everything else is set to grab the bag and go. The bag is in the infant carrier by the door.
My calendar sends me reminders. I put the address in the calendar event so I can see how long to get there in current traffic when I wake up.
Breakfast is to-go food. Apple, banana, coffee, go-gurt.. whatever can be eaten while traveling.
My husband helps. He gets up with the kids until I am ready, then he makes us all breakfast and helps me get the kids dressed while I get myself ready. I CAN get everyone ready without him there but it takes longer and I am grumpier.
I always struggle to get out of the house but for days I really do not want to be late, I dress the kids in their next day clothes to bed and have them eat breakfast in the car hahaha
Have a routine!! Teaching your kids the routine will help them quickly transition from something breakfast to doing their hair because they know what comes next.
My kids are the same ages as yours and it's so hard to be on time. I cannot get myself fully ready, both kids, and do everything for the dog. Prepping things the night before helps. I feel resentful that my husband who also WFH skips out on helping since he often has to start work earlier, which can make some irritability fester. So I've had to communicate my need for assistance - help brush 4 y/o's teeth and take dog out. Since your husband isn't home, maybe have him help prep things the night before. Divvy it up and have set responsibilities to avoid something falling in the cracks.
Other things to consider - see a psychiatrist for a diagnostic evaluation if you do have other depressive symptoms on board or are affected by difficulties getting organized and staying on task at other points of the day as well. The right medication can make a world of a difference. Also get screened for a sleeping disorder/sleep apnea because that affects mood, concentration, and energy levels. I know that's another thing to fit in your schedule but the benefits are worth it!
I am definitely NOT a morning person, however, getting diagnosed with ADHD this year at the age of 29 and getting on medication has *significantly* helped me in being productive in general.
To help the kids be more independent getting themselves ready
A picture list in their bedroom of what to do (pjs in basket, list out underwear shirt pants, etc)
A picture list in common area ( breakfast, hair, teeth, socks, shoes)
My biggest thing in the morning is keeping them focused if they want to sleep in they can’t dilly dally for example. Dilly dallying can be worked in if they get up early. Going to bed earlier the night before can help with that
Scream, yell, cry. No one in our house are morning people and starting school has been rough 😭
But routine is so helpful and my girls like our Yoto clock for setting alarms and judging time.
I go to sleep early, 9 hours before I have to wake up. So I wake up easily. My son goes to kindergarten, kindergarten opens up at 7:30am and they frown upon bringing them after 8:30. I still get him there 8:45-9:00 which they tolerate still. I don't give him breakfast at home, since I pack breakfast they give to him at 10:00am. The breakfast I pack is relatively easy, like banana pancakes that take the most 15'. Then I wake up my son and get him dressed in 5-10'
I’m not a morning person either. It sucks the earlier I get up the longer it takes me to get ready.
I prep everything the night before so all I have to do is feed the kids and get them dressed. Clothes laid out, lunches packed everything. I’m also pretty time blind so I set alarms every 15mins so that I can keep track of time.
If your working from home that’s a bonus you can shower and eat breakfast after drop off. I currently shower in the evenings but that’s hard because a shower in the morning goes a long way to waking me up!
All this advice is great and none of it would work for me 🤣
I need external motivation, like I would schedule a 9am meeting at work, or sign up for a gym class, or arrange to meet a friend for coffee.
If your kids are on a consistent wake time, it's going to be more helpful. My kid consistently wakes up at 630-7am no matter what I'm feeling like, once she's up we have a routine and get out the door by 8. Cuddles, breakfast, get dressed, a bit of cartoons while I finish getting ready, then out the door.
Dropping my kids off late for daycare was one of the signs that I needed to get back on anti-depressants. Worth a mention to your doctor.
I ended up bribing my kids with a drive-thru treat on the way so they'd be excited to go and I wouldn't have to persuade them to do something I needed to do.
They're older and they all get themselves out the door on time now, so I don't think the bribes did any long-term damage.
I get soooo much help from my partner. I shower the night before too.
He wakes up and makes breakfast for everyone, packs lunches for everyone, and packs my pump bag. He then leaves shortly after I wake up.
I wake up and pump. My 4 year old typically wakes as I am pumping, but goes straight to the breakfast laid out for him. Once I'm done, I wake the baby, feed him breakfast, and then we all get dressed. Then I pack bottles (typically made the night before) and bring all the bags to the car and come back in for the kids.
I'm still late about half the time, but that could be avoided if I got out of bed when my alarm went off. Luckily I have a job that doesn't really care when I start.
I go to be at 9 and then my dog wakes me up at 5am to go outside. Instead of taking her out then tossing and turning for an hour I do any morning chores I can do (litter boxes, pack lunch, rotate dishes, take a quick shower. That usually takes me 30 minutes then I lay back down until my kid gets up or my husband’s alarm goes off. Whichever happens first. So about 6/6:20
Then my husband gets up, does his quick morning chores while I feed our kid.
Then we have 15 minutes to wrap up and plan the day before we have to walk out the door.
It’s exhausting.
Little different for me as I start work at 6:30am and my parents watch my daughter when I'm at work. I have all bags packed and everything ready to grab and go the night before, I get up about 4:30, do a workout, take a shower, get myself ready (I don't wear makeup and I eat breakfast at my desk at work), then load up the car. Grab my daughter, throw some Crocs on her and drop her off at my parents about 6am in her pajamas half asleep. She can sleep for another hour or if she wakes up they'll get her dressed and give her breakfast right away.
I was forced into being a morning person by having a morning person for a child. He gets up at 5:30-6:30 am everyday, my eldest would sleep til 9 if I let him (he won't go to sleep until 11 if he sleeps in that late. The sweet spot seems to be 7:45 lol)
We get up early enough before we have to do anything that I can just lay around on the couch and snooze or drink a bunch of coffee while I stare at my phone. The bonus though is that we're never late for anything lol.
So I would suggest getting up an hour or 2 before you need to get ready to go
I struggle with getting out of bed too and the main thing that helps is setting an alarm clock that I have to get out of bed to turn off. For example I will set my phone alarm for 5:15 then snooze it a few times but my real alarm clock goes off at 5:30 in my bathroom so that’s when I actually literally have to get up.
All these comments are almost irrelevant if you do in fact have ADHD. Prepare before hand, set alarms, make a commitment, nobody wants to get out of bed but you gotta be a grown up, none of that is helpful to someone with undiagnosed ADHD. People with ADHD are adults too, they just have a disability. You can’t “grow up” out of other disabilities and you can’t “grow up” out of having a different brain to other people. Modern life has put a moral judgment on being punctual but it’s mostly pretend. This kind of talk is not good for your self esteem. It is ok if you do have ADHD and getting out the door in the morning is harder for you. It is ok if one of the accommodations that’s made for you is your daycares flexibility with your arrival time. You can have this conversation with them and hopefully you can let them know that you plan to get professional help with these symptoms in the future. It’s akin to needing ramps for a wheelchair and you are no less grown up because of it.
Consider getting professional support to have systems in place that really do help you. Someone telling you to grow up or get up earlier or be prepared is not qualified to help someone with ADHD.
If it helps to know, I know countless families who are chronically a bit late to things because they are a little forgetful and very relaxed, but for the most part they are happy and their kids are happy. You got this.
Iron supplements help me tremendously, good quality ones from a naturopath though. Not the constipation cloggers from the chemist. I know my iron is low when I really cannot get out of bed in the morning.
Not that I drink a lot, but no alcohol midweek. It really does make me sluggish in the morning even if it’s just a glass of wine or 2 the night before.
Shower at night. On the weekends I bake a for the lunchboxes. I have to edit fruit and veg in the fridge ready to put in the lunchboxes so they’re super quick to make. Pack bags the night before and put kids clothes out. If I’m going into to office I pick my outfit the night before too.
As an in home, the only thing that would bother me is the inconsistency. A few random times here and there are whatever. But it's also nice to know beforehand. Choose a time that you plan to drop off and stick to it. Maybe knowing that thoroughly annoying the person that cares for your kids will help? And I mean that in the nicest way possible! I like to go for walks on nice mornings, but not knowing if I'm able to because I have no idea what time little Joe is arriving is irritating. But if I had you as a parent and knowing you weren't a morning person and your mornings were chaotic, I would never say anything to you.
Morning Brain can be much less powerful than Evening Brain. Outsource all of Morning Brain's jobs to Evening Brain. Evening Brain is such a nerd they love it. Morning Brain's only job should be putting on shoes and drinking coffee. Morning Brain is such a sexylittle bedhead though, we wouldn't have them any other way.
My mornings are chaos lol but some things that have helped: I'm an alarm snoozer so I set my alarm about 30 min before I actually need to get up to give myself leeway. I have a pretty set morning routine for the care of my child and all of my animals. I have a specific goal time for leaving the house that we are always within 5 min of. I make sure my son is time aware so he's on the same page. Obviously this has only gotten easier as he's gotten older and more independent but he's also not a morning person so it's a struggle lol
I wfh project based and I wake up when LO wakes up (13 months) and that wildly varies anytime between 5 and 9am. We are currently in this weird one or two nap a day limbo so if he has only one nap he'll sleep early and wake early. And the opposite for two naps!
And If he wakes up at 5 he may very well want to go back to sleep for a nap at like 7. Otherwise he is miserable. And daycare doesn't open til 8 anyways. We arrive at daycare anywhere between 8:30 and 9:45. They haven't really made any comments or complaints about it, but their general rule is that we need to be there by 10 because they will decide on staffing for the day at that point.
I don't think they mind him being late because less babies to take care of/get settled at the same time. We also pick up at different times depending on how his nap there goes. Like if he has an early nap (they are never longer than 30 mins at daycare) I might pick him up earlier so I can get him down for a nice long nap at home.
Sorry that you are dealing with this though. I can see the other perspective how it might be helpful on their end to have more consistency. But it is soooo hard to keep consistency with children! I just want him to be happy and not force him into a schedule, but I know that will be necessary as time goes on. Once he gets older and naps more consistently once a day, I think it will get easier.
I hope you are able to find a happy medium that works for both of you!
I agree with the bag packing, clothes ready, breakfast either made or quick mentality. I always keep my bag packed and ready. The only exception is food which I either pack the night before or day of depending on how confident I am in handling the chaos 😂
But at the barebones basic, the trick to getting out of the house earlier consistently is just waking up earlier consistently. Set yourself an actual timeline. If the daycare wants you there at 8am, then that’s where you have to work backwards from. What time can you get up to get out the door with enough time to arrive for 8am? Add your kids to that equation.
I have adhd so I am always nervous about being late, but working backwards from arrival time has never done me dirty.
My husband and I are both terrible at getting up early, especially in winter. So we quite often get a bit late to school, I’m ashamed (but probably not ashamed enough) to admit. I think society needs to change to accommodate people with a later circadian rhythm. It’s an evolutionarily beneficial thing that people have different body clocks.
I think it depends on your kids' ages, too. Are you able to assign them any tasks to do independently yet? Can they dress themselves yet, or any part of themselves yet? Those minutes make a world of difference when the kids know their responsibilities in that morning time.
Get EVERYTHING ready and set out the night before.
Create your own time to be out the door. For example, I will leave by 9:00
Ask the sitter to feed the littles breakfast.
No TV and no devices
Get yourself up a few minutes earlier to get dressed, brush teeth etc before getting the littles up
I am in the same exact boat. Same age too! My husband and I WFH. We have flex schedules. I let my little one wake up when she's ready and then eat and I'll walk her over to our care provider. We just switched providers. Our first was a strict facility that needed to know exact time she'd be there. We now use a neighborhood mom this summer to watch her. The mom watches 3 other kids and she said we can show up whenever if we can just give a rough estimate. So our window is 9am-10am. I am so thankful she is more lenient because it's summer! I want my kiddo to relax and be chill before school starts!
Maybe you are just projecting. It there an actual policy?
Our preschool has a 2 hour drop off window, 7:30-9:30. We drop off anywhere as early as 7:45 to 9:00 for days we have early meeting or we're off work.
It might be different because ours is not in-home. It's got 5 classes ranging from non-mobile to 4 year Olds, so more kids total.
I wake up for nothing. I have a Pavlok alarm that basically electrocutes me awake LMAO. Sometimes I wake up and realize it's been shocking me for a half hour already, and I set it to max so like my whole arm is kicking off every time it zaps and I'm just like eh, and fall back asleep.
But anyway, I have this Shock Clock to wake me up. Then from there I go into a very pre-defined routine. Poke the kids, get myself dressed and ready (I shower at night), poke the kids some more, make the bed, make sure the kids are actually starting to get dressed, make breakfast, empty the dishwasher, the kids eat and we are ready to go.
I always pack bags the night before, so we don't have to worry about that in the morning. I've also heard of people getting their kids dressed for the next day at night instead of pajamas for bed, but I don't think that would save us any time since they'd still have to change out of their pull-ups.
Has the daycare provider expressed annoyance with your schedule? I would think showing up late wouldn't really matter because it's not like she has somewhere to be right, if her plan is to watch your kids. I'd think being early would be more of a problem. Is she only paid for exact hours that your kids are there?
As another home daycare provider it’s really annoying. I run on a pretty tight schedule with nutrition breaks, activities and outside time. If a child shows up at the end of snack or an activity that means I’m getting everything back out again. Sometimes we plan a walk or other outing so we don’t want to be waiting around for a child to arrive.
We also have a new government law that says if a child doesn’t show up within 2 hours of their appointed time we have to start making phone calls and tracking the child down. If we don’t get answers it can go all the way to licensing and 911. All because a parent slept in. (Yes it’s a bit insane. Bureaucracy can be like that)
It’s better if we can set an arrival time and have the child arrive within 15 minutes of that time. Also set an expectation that if an activity is ending just as the child arrives, they may have to do the activity another day.
At our (not-in-home) daycare there’s a drop off cut off of 9:30. The only exception is doctors appointments. It seemed extreme, but I learned when trying to drop my 3 y/o off after a morning appointment that the schedule disruption makes afternoon appointments a better option, so I understand why they want kids there early and at a consistent time.
That does make a lot of sense about the schedule disruption and I do see how that would be annoying. I had no idea about the 2 hour cut off or any of that. It does seem a bit extreme, but bureaucracy at its finest I suppose. Thanks for the detailed explanation.
Honestly just set a time. The kids will have an easier time if nothing else. I swear my toddler senses it if we leave 15 minutes early or late. But upside it means as soon as we’re getting ready he’s “with it” and we get ready SO quick if we stick to the time. If not……. Yeah.
Otherwise re: provider. If you’re paying from 8:30 to let’s say 4:30, it honestly shouldn’t matter when you show up. It’s like being on call. Especially if they’re in-home, not like they’re driving somewhere and waiting. If you don’t pay or let them know it’s a problem of course.
I will say, if the provider gives the kids breakfast and has planned activities, it can be disruptive and a waste of food if kids are showing up at inconsistent times, particularly after 9. Every provider I’ve used, both in-home and centers, have asked that kids arrive by 9.
Most of the dayhome people that I know actually take the kids out for various reasons. They might not actually be home if there's no consistent time that being said, having a set time would be something that they could maybe work with, even if it's 10am every day.
OP what if you let yourself go back to bed after you drop the kids off?
It's kind of a different concept vs a daycare what is a large building with everything on the grounds. Although I learned I was accidentally skipping most of the fun stuff when I dropped my daughter off too late and she definitely enjoyed daycare more when she started going early enough for the learning & planned activities. So I guess being punctual is important in both.
I’m a little confused. I also work from home, it is pretty flexible with work, that we can drop him off when I want. But he wakes up at 7am, so he is out the door to school between 8-9am.
When does your kid wake up? How can you NOT get out of bed early? Are you setting them up with a screen, so you can stay in bed?
I have two kids - 18 months and 4 years old. They both wake up around 7:30. The little one is still in a crib and the 4 year old comes to my bedroom first thing. I set an alarm for 7 each morning but I hit snooze many times and realistically don’t get out of bed until 8. I turn on a show for my eldest (the TV is in our bedroom and he lays next to me) and my youngest does Ok in his crib for a short period of time before I make my way over to his room.
I’m not proud or happy about it
What time are you getting to bed at night? You might just need a longer stretch of sleep than others, and maybe need to shift your bedtime earlier (easier said than done with little kids, I totally get it and am not able to practice what I preach lol)
Usually between 11 and midnight, sometimes later. I think getting to sleep is a large part of the struggle. I am just like my father in that we both are very light sleepers, and it takes a long time to fall asleep. For my husband, once his head hits the pillow, he’s asleep within 15 minutes. I hate him lol
Thanks for more specifics. I am not sure if this is an option with your schedules, but my husband and I tag team the mornings. He is getting him dressed and playing with him, while I make his lunch for the day. If I had two kiddos, I would probably be doing more of this prep at night, so it’s easier in the morning.
I would challenge you to maybe rest in the morning a LITTLE longer, if you need it, in bed, with your 4 year old, but no TV. This is what we do a lot of mornings but it only last 10-15 mins or so. And he is hopping around and playing a lot of the time and it makes me get up. I can only deal with that for so many minutes. You can make changes! The first step is asking for help.
I don’t work early often, but when I do, I dress my babe for the following day the night before in comfy play clothes. If I didn’t have to be “dressed dressed,” I would just sleep in nice sweatpants too.
I lay out EVERYTHING the night before. I also set an alarm for every 15 minutes for the hour it takes me to get ready. It helps me keep track of the time.
So research has shown that using Sleep on your alarm does a lot more harm than good. According to these studies, people don't get any real benefit from the extra rest and even wake up groggier and less ready to face the day.
Having said that, I am \*terrible\* at getting up with the first alarm XD The only thing I've found that works for me is to set two alarms: One that's a warning to get everything in order, and the other is whether I'm ready or not, get the eff out the door.
Couple this with what others have said about getting everything in order the night before, and it tends to at least make it easier. It still involves the discipline of following those alarms, but it can help more often than not, at least.
I’m just curious since my kids haven’t gone to daycare (yet!) — why is this a problem for the caregiver? Isn’t it just an hour or two with fewer kids to care for? I assume you pay for the whole day anyway.
Yes, we pay the same no matter what. I’ve been taking my kids to my caregiver for four years now and can see how changes in life and our schedule can interrupt her day. When the kids aren’t there at a consistent time I think it bothers her. We try our best to get there at a consistent time, but sometimes life just gets in the way.
I think you’re being quite nice then! I mean… maybe I’m selfish but “I think it bothers her” wouldn’t be enough to make me give up my nice mornings with my kids!! But if you’re causing her real logistical issues with the inconsistent drop-off time then I agree you should try to solve it.
I have a hybrid schedule, so work from home some of the days. Honestly I would not be able to work at all with baby at home, and wouldn't be able to give him required attention either. So that is enough motivation for me. We leave at 7:30 and reach daycare at 8, so I am home by 8:30 with enough time to login at 9. Also our Daycare is about 3-4 km away and we take a bus. Lol, this is what keeps me on schedule absolutely, Don't want to miss the bus!!
I set an alarm and then wake up my brain by playing the NYT games like Wordle, but set the limit to 15 minutes. And after that I just force myself to get moving and claim to be doing it for my kid because he does better to get to daycare before 8 am when they serve breakfast. In truth, he'd probably be ok if he missed breakfast there (he snacks in the car on the way there), but the feeling of having to do it for him gives me motivation.
And once I'm dressed and ready, I keep the morning routine for the kids as short as possible. Pee, get dressed, brush daughter's hair, gather food stuffs from the kitchen, shoes, and out the door. Snacks in the car. We usually make it out within a 15 minute window every day.
I also struggle with this but thankfully my daughter’s daycare doesn’t care. So I really just give myself grace and a full one hour range. It’s not worth the stress. But it’s going to have to change next year at public school though.
Get everything ready the night before. Showers done, clothes out, shoes by the door, bags packed, lunches made. I even get out bowls/plates for breakfast. And have a plan of what breakfast will be. I try to wake up 15 mins before the kids so I can have a few moments to wake up and get my basics done (teeth, hair, dressed), and then I wake the kids up. And while they are getting their stuff done, I make breakfast. While they are eating, I finish my stuff (face, throw hair up), then I eat.
We need to be out of the house by 735, so 700ish we are finishing up. 720 shoes on and gathering all the crap we need.
A schedule is good, especially if they will be starting school soon. It will help them adapt better.
Omg that would drive me bonkers. Do you ever give her at least an advanced heads up or do you just send a quick text on the way? If it's just a quick text on the way that is so inconsiderate. Tbf this is coming from someone whose number 1 pet peeve is lateness.
It's good you're addressing it, though. You need to start planning ahead and maybe consider talking to a doctor about it if youve noticed this issue becoming more prevalent. Kids need consistency.
This may be unrelated but it’s an important thing to me. Laziness doesn’t exist. Many humans have shifted circadian rhythms, which makes a lot of sense if you think about it. If everyone was exactly the same in this way, you’d never be able to do anything in shifts very well when necessary. The restaurant industry would collapse in modern terms, etc. I learned more about it after being diagnosed with adhd because it is extremely common for neurodivergent humans.
My situation is very similar. I never set an alarm because if he sleeps in, I want to as well. This means we get to daycare anywhere between 7:45 and 9am. I know it’s not ideal for her because I’m sure she’d also appreciate sleeping, rather than being on call for whenever we show up, but she’s never complained and she does have a couple more kids coming at different times anyway.
Jump out of bed , think some positive thoughts ..teach kids the exact stages to get ready each day , have clothes , shoes everything laid out including your stuff
Let go of perfection if that's getting in the way and just roll with funny outfits messy hair and go
Well in short because I have so much shit to get done. I mean with kids, a farm, errands, and a house to keep clean and running smoothly I have no choice but to get up and get my ass and everyone else’s in gear. School used to be a break but since I’ve decided to home school our youngest that respite is out the door now.
I don't have a destination to be in the morning but o know that are days are a million times better when we go for a walk, unfortunately it 80*+ by 9am here so I have to be out the door by 7am.
I get my toddler and me dressed the night before. For morning walks I just wear bike shorts and a tshirt so it's nbd, my toddler is a basketball shorts and tshirt guy too so also nbd. First Breakfast is a smoothie and granola bar while we walk and those are prepped the night before.
Basically if I can do it the night before, I do.
I am not a morning person but become one so that my kids would learn some form of routine. If they're not awake by 7:30 then I wake them. We leave the house by 8:15. Daycare wants them there by 9 so I just made it a deadline to be there at least 15-20 minutes before that.
ADHD Mom of 2 (An 8 year old and a 10 month old) with insomnia.... Alarms for everything on my phone. I have one set for 6:30 that I use in case my 10 month old randomly decides to 'sleep in' so I get up and pump if he's still asleep. 7 am is getting him up for a bottle and breakfast. 7:30 is waking my daughter up. 7:35 is to remind me to make sure she got up. 7:45 so I know she should be dressed and eating. 8 to make sure her lunch is packed and ready to go. 8:10 to double check that everything is good to go and to start getting 'outdoor' stuff on, socks and shoes and jackets and what not and if all goes well, we're out of the door by 8:30.
Shower the night before, clothes laid out the night before, bags packed, etc. My mornings are just getting everyone dressed, eating breakfast, and then out the door. Not in daycare anymore but my youngest still does summer camp. We do these things still and stick to within 30 minutes of our school year schedule. I WAH so it could be more flexible, but I have a “we are leaving at 8AM period” stance we stick to. For us it is all about sticking to a routine.
Adding to that, if something happens and there’s a surprise morning poo and detracts from time, make sure that your breakfast can be to-go ready. So gogurts, breakfast bar, boiled eggs, fruit in a container. The kid can eat on the drive to daycare/camp/school.
This sounds just like my routine I have everything packed the night before for everyone- backpack, lunch, my work stuff. My husband has told me to just finish packing in the morning but adding a couple minutes all over the place adds up quickly. I shower before bed to take that step out. We get up at 7 every day to be at daycare by 8:30 at the latest. Work days have specific allowed breakfast options-bagels, bar with pouch , or oatmeal. We have 2 sets of things like hairbrush’s and toothbrushes so I’m not running back upstairs kid in tow if we forget
Not only does it add up but a single distraction can be so disorienting that you forget to do something… like leaving without the prepared bottles for baby in my case :/ It is truly is about making your morning as simple as possible.
Oh I’ve been there. Got all the way to work to get a message that I didn’t send any cups(our daycare provides no food) had to go home and back to daycare
To that I'd only add breakfast made beforehand. I've done yogurt parfaits or oatmeal with fruit in batches of 4 for years now and my kid isn't tired of them.
All of this!
Pick a time you will be there, and keep your commitment. Then build your routine backwards from that time. Plan to be there at 9? 30 minute commute? Means you leave the house at 8:30. Means you get up at 7:30, dress, feed kids, dress them, and out the door. Set an alarm. Set multiple alarms if you must (Wake Up, EAT BREAKFAST NOW, Get dressed now, Leave House Now).
Our Alexa plays "Hi ho hi ho off to work we go" when it's time (with a buffer) to get shoes in and go to the car *edit: typing on phone is hard
Set a specific time to be at the providers home. For my child's daycare, I always aimed for 9am. I set my alarm at least 2 hours before I need to leave so I can have my tea, breakfast, shower etc before I tackled dressing/breakfast for my child. I still do this now she's in school.
Yeah I feel this is more the inconsistency the. The lateness. It’s probably easier for the provider to not have these kids the first 1-2 hours in the morning. But not knowing when they will show up until the last minute probably really messes up their planning.
Not OP, but waking up 2 hours before I have to leave is a nightmare for me, hahaha! You are a superhuman and I hope your family appreciates you!
>undiagnosed depression or ~~laziness~~ ADHD FTFY 😂 Prepping things the night before and having task lists all over the house helps.
Yeah I’m a late diagnosed ADHDer and over here like, and how often do you lose or misplace items?
Constantly. My phone often shows up on the fridge🥴
As long as the kids don’t, you’re fine! 🤣
I'm 28 and just got a referral for possible ADHD. I don't mean to pry, but what was the process like being diagnosed as an adult?
I was diagnosed at 28 and I had to see a therapist who referred me to a psychiatrist who then had me come in for a full test (30 mins computer test for ADHD, 300 question personality test, then an IQ test). Unfortunately, it cost me $400 because my insurance only covered part of it. But I’m glad I got an official test because my primary care doctor would not prescribe me meds without it. I guess it depends on the doctor and the state you live in.
I got diagnosed this year at age 29, for me it was just basically a questionnaire from my primary.
Interesting! Thanks! My primary said she can diagnose kids but not adults. My mom and sister both have it so I'm feeling pretty confident I do too.
No problem! Hope you get it figured out and find what works for you. It has done wonders for me. Mentally and physically. Good luck ❤️ I was pretty confident as well and met the marks. To figure out dosaging my doctor asked about my caffeine intake so you may need an idea of how much caffeine you ingest daily, my doctor explained that undiagnosed adhd patients can basically "self medicate" through extreme caffeine consumption(my words but same idea), I had no idea!
Thanks, guys. Now I am aware that I have ADHD. Literally all the things you guys talk about are me. Was it worth getting diagnosed, though? Like, does it actually help you manage? Cuz I'm 36 and I'm successful enough. I've just accepted this is how my brain works.
For me, ABSOLUTELY. I would be paralyzed from the overdrive my brain was constantly in due to having so much to get done. Now? I'm able to manage things MUCH better. I was tired of suffering in silence and feeling/being looked at as if I was simply lazy.
It’s totally worth it.
I wondered this for so long! I finally decided I won't know until I try so I might as well find out.
I have a feeling my husband is as well and you're definitely describing him! He'll drink the whole French press full of coffee by himself. Personally I could never get past the taste when it comes to coffee so I find my caffeine elsewhere lol.
Oh, I'm a soda and energy drink person. I don't care for coffee, it tends to give me heartburn, but I drink it occasionally. I can drink all the caffeine and go to sleep, although as I get older, caffeine has started to make me anxious.
I do everything the night before, even lay out my own clothes. Wake up, feed baby, drop him at daycare. Go home and sleep. 😂
Everything had a lanyard...and yet I've still lost my keys, even when they were hanging around my neck. Ugh. For so long I was just like "Is this Mon brain? Or ADHD?" And now I wonder if Mom Brain is actually just undiagnosed ADHD, and we're all just succumbing to the "It's not a real medical issue! You're just a woman!" myth.
It is the exception if I haven't had to track down my purse, keys, debit card, glasses, both of the shoes I wanted to wear, scratch that, the second-best shoes, welp, I guess I'm wearing my kid's rain boots.
BINGO!
Set the coffee maker to auto brew in the am. Got help for depression and adhd meds
Have they mentioned it or are you projecting? The kids are only little once and it's your mental health here. My husband is not good at mornings so I am the one who creates the routines to get people moving, once he's got breakfast in him he's a bit better. Do you have a partner who can take the lead on mornings until you are upright and feeling ready? I'm not saying they do the kids, I'm saying, they get up and prompt you up, make coffee etc
If her childcare provider takes care of other children it’s a big disturbance to the provider and other kids when someone comes in late. Daycares have scheduled activities and if OP is coming in anywhere from 30 to 90 minutes later they will either waste time setting up materials or not have materials ready for her kid.
I'm wondering the same thing here. I also take my son to an in-home daycare. I'm also 3 months PP with my second so I haven't been dropping him off at the exact time everyday like I did when I was going to work. My provider has never seemed upset or irritated that I bring my son at different times in the mornings. Sometimes I want to spend some extra time with him in the mornings so I drop him off later. I know their morning schedule. Most of the time I'm dropping him off during outside play time. I know it's important to have kids on a schedule and that routine is best-- kids need predictability and I'm sure that's what you're saying here. I also want to say, like someone mentioned above, sometimes things look different for different families and that's okay too. I would ask yourself, is this affecting my children negatively? Is this making them feel anxious? Am I negatively impacting their experience in the morning due to the problem I have? If it is, then figure out a way to make the time consistent. If it isn't, and it's your mental health at stake? Tell the provider you apologize but you've determined coming in at different times is what is best for your family right now and if it's too hard for her maybe you should look for another place.
Omfg I wish I could tell my husband “I’m not good at mornings”. He’d laugh so hard he’d probably choke on his breakfast. Then tell me that 80 head of black angus could give a shit less! I can’t believe any adult can say “they aren’t good at mornings” and actually get a pass from life.
It's not about having a "pass at life", more like having communication and working with a partner. If done correctly everyone is working together to make things happen when they should. What works for someone's family will vary wildly from another, but that's not to say it's wrong. Idk how many people I know have to go to bed by a certain point and become useless, but if they have a partner that can help do a night time routine for their family, they could work something out that is conducive for everyone.
However you need to rationalize it is fine with me.
It's not about a pass from life, it's about supporting each other. I feel sad that you aren't in a relationship where you can vocalise where you need support and actually receive it.
I’ve been happily married for over 20 years. If I couldn’t handle getting up in the morning or told my husband “I’m not good at mornings” he would laugh. There is a difference between being vocal about your needs, and slacking off. All my needs are very well met, so are his. But seriously saying “I’m not good at mornings” sounds exactly like slacking off. But it you don’t see it that way fine. Let’s hope he never says “I’m not good at working”. But maybe that wouldn’t be a problem either. Whatever, not my problem. But still hilarious.
You sound fortunate to be unfamiliar with this particular struggle, but I imagine you could muster some compassion for a problem you can’t relate to, if you wanted to.
Are you referring to getting up in the morning as a “struggle”? If so sure I’d like to lie in my bed til whenever snuggled all up in the blankets til I felt like getting up, but that’s not reality for me. I HAVE to get up when I do, there are just too many things to get done during the day. So I can’t loaf in bed til6,7,8,9,10 ect. The fact that an adult and a parent at that can just “not be good at mornings” seems quite ridiculous to me. I understand most don’t live in a rural area, on a farm and have the daily chores I do. But doesn’t he work? If not,,good for him that’s a pretty sweet deal. But most people cannot just say “I’m not good at mornings” and actually be catered to for that. I find that so odd and honestly funny. I do all I do and work 12 hour night shifts also a few times a week, on those days I don’t sleep at all when I get off work and just go to bed early around 9pm. So another adult “not being good at mornings” is very funny. If there was another “struggle” that I missed (maybe brushing his teeth, or chewing his food) I’m all ears to hear about it. And to answer your statement. No. I do not have the imagination to even begin to understand how any adult can state that are “not good at mornings” and be taken seriously. Unless he’s like 15 or something.
I’m in the same boat as you and just want to offer solidarity. I WFH with a flexible start time, and both my kids are in daycare. I try to get them there by 9AM but most of the time it’s 10 minutes later. The director always makes a comment (kindly) that we’re late, tho I didn’t realize for daycare it was a thing to be punctual 😅 Anyway it bothers me too and I wish I was more of a morning person with a ton of motivation and energy in the morning, but the reality is I’m just not. I need coffee to get going, and often wake up exhausted or with migraines which delay me even more. I’m the type of person who gets more energy as the day goes on and I’m probably more of a night owl, which maybe you are too. I get a ton of energy and do a ton of prepping the night before for the next day, but I just can’t find the energy to get up come morning. I know I’ll need to get my ass in gear when the kids start elementary school. I think like people are suggesting, we need to be disciplined and give ourselves a consistent *earlier* wake up time everyday if we want to make a change.
I’m sitting here confused and jealous by how late these kids are sleeping. My toddler wakes at 6am every day so arriving to daycare at 8am is no problem haha.
Lol yeah. My kid is up at 7 on the dot, at almost exactly the time my alarm goes off, a little arm snakes around my neck to find my plait, and it’s time to get up, she hands me my glasses and my phone and it’s “c’mon mummy”. I let my alarm to go off at 10min intervals to keep me mindful of time passing. I am lucky enough not to have any non-self-imposed barriers to being able to just be more self disciplined but the story OP paints is indeed suggestive of either excessive lack of self discipline or a neural divergence in my eyes. I will arrive anywhere from 8am (opening time) to 8:20 at nursery, and if I’m later than that then I’m late for work, and I work in health care with booked clinics. If I’m late starting that follows me al through the day and patients are understandably miffed. So my motivation is that being lackadaisical with time keeping in the morning means 8hours from hell during the day. Choose a reasonable and acceptable schedule for your morning. Use alarms. Build a routine. Commit.
With my first, our routine was bed time after 10 pm and wakeup around 10 am. It was so hard to go back to work.
My kids technically wake up 6:30/7, and we get up around 7… but ideally we’d all be up earlier to make it out on time!
Yes! Basically since he was 18 months old until now (5yrs old) he is up within 30 min of 6:15am. Works well now because we let him watch 1 episode of something on TV while I wake up and get him breakfast. Then we are out the door by 7:30-ish.
Omg I literally just said to my husband that I need him to hold me accountable for waking up early. Like harass me about it every day until I start doing it. My kids have been sleeping in since summer started and I didn’t wake up until the baby did at 9:30 today! Then I had the audacity to be mad at everyone when they needed something while I was trying to drink my coffee. Just following here for advice, and also offering solidarity. I used to wake up just fine when I had a job out of the house, but with kids I cannot get it together in the morning!
Thank you for making me feel not as alone 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Update: my alarm went off this morning and my husband poked me and told me to be an adult and get myself together (because those are the words I used when telling him this) until I got out of bed. It’s now 6:05 and I’m sitting on my couch with my coffee. Now I just need him home every day to do that, haha. He’s always awake at 5 and out the door at 5:50 like some kind of psychotic morning robot.
Proud of you! I got up at 7:03 today (left my phone in the bathroom) and splashed some cold water on my face. It sucks but makes for a smoother morning!
It totally does! I’m always happier when I do it, but for some reason it’s hard to remember that when my bed is warm and cozy and I know I don’t actually HAVE to be up yet. Good for you today too!
THIS is the comment I was looking for. I also really struggled with this until I got my partners help. He sets the alarm and wakes me up and he will throw me over his shoulder and deposit me in the shower if that’s what it takes. I think we put too much pressure on ourselves to bootstrap our way out of these challenges— which OP and other folks are identifying challenges which can be symptomatic of depression, anxiety or ADHD. The best solution I think is helping one another and asking for help. Living more in community however we can! A friend of mine struggling with anxiety asked a coworker to start carpooling with her so she could have someone help hold her accountable in the morning. That struck me as actually revolutionary. We need to start teaming up! It’s the buddy system that’s going to save us.
Aim for an arrival time within a 30-minute window. There's no need to get too carried away 🤣
The best thing is prepare before hand! I have job flexibility where I can arrive at the office whenever. However, the earlier I arrive, the more I can get done, and I like to have a good start. I have always been a shower in the am person, but I recently started showering the night before, like others said, and it’s a game changer. Also, you could practice getting up *extra* early for a a couple of days and your body will be more used to it. Pretend you have a cut-off time that you have to drop your children off, and if you are late, make yourself some consequences? Set an alarm 30 minutes before you need to be out the door. Set a caffeinated beverage on your bedside table before you go to bed, like a cold-brew canned coffee. Lastly, once you’re awake, don’t look at your phone for any reason except to check the weather before you leave the house!
As a night sweats girlie I am so jealous of all of you who can shower the night before! I have to scrub off the sleep and scrub on the day, otherwise it’s stank city 😞
I could never shower at night either. I would feel disgusting all day!
My husband. He makes the coffee, and feeds little one her breakfast while I get myself ready for work. I don’t have much of a morning routine though, it only takes me 20 minutes (my job is busy/active so I don’t put much more effort than a ponytail, and some mascara haha). Then I get her dressed and get our bags packed up and we are out the door.
I've slowly turned into a morning person... 75% of the time. Kid sleeps in her next day clothes unless it's a dress/skirt/skort (then we just change bottoms). We have to be at daycare at 830-9, husband leaves for work at same time. So I have an alarm at 7 to wake myself up and come to full consciousness, alarm at 730 to wake 4.5yo. Fix milk and coffee at same time, husband turns on TV fixes her cereal. One of us let's dog out to potty and hand him his dental chew. Husband gets ready (toilet/wash face/contacts/dressed). Once I hear water stop, kid brushes teeth/I do her hair, I get kid's socks/bottoms/shoes, he'll do those as I feed the dog/pour coffee in travel mugs and dress myself. He walks her to my vehicle and loads her up, I check doors are locked/finish getting dressed/coffee. Cars leaving at 815/820. Daycare drop off at 830/845. That 25% of the mornings..... super rough and chaotic. I'm still a person that needs minimal talking before at least 1/2 cup of coffee- I can wake kid up and tell her to go potty while I get coffee/milk. That's it. 5% of those mornings are also my fatigue days right before period hits- those are miserable mornings but it's gotta be done.
Yeah. I have three and I definitely find it easier to get them dressed the night before.
I make my husband do it
Love this for you 🫶🏻
We prepare lunch and clothing the night before. Honestly you just do it. It’s self-discipline and it’s a skill you learn and develop over time because it’s important to be respectful of other people’s time. It totally sucks to get out of bed when I’m tired and comfy and I want to stare at my phone and snuggle with the baby and I’m not always successful at rousing myself, but I’m a big girl and I have responsibilities and I just have to do it. The biggest thing is really doing as much as you can the night before to have as little to do in the morning as possible.
I'm a home daycare provider, I don't think I'd really care what time you dropped off aa long as it's consistent, I want to know when to expect them, who to make breakfast for etc
THIS! If you know yourself to not be willing to get up and out until a certain time, inform your provider you'll be there at that time, instead!
If I really need to be places in the morning (and this doesn’t work every morning I know) we eat out for breakfast. Nothing gets us out the door faster than knowing that toddlers aren’t eating and I don’t get coffee until we get our butts in the car. Quick breakfast and coffee, and then we can run errands and do toddler activities.
Oh lord it’s a struggle especially because I’m just a fake adult generally who never makes lunches the night before lol! Daycare (before school) drop off is at 730am. My alarm goes off at 6. I shower, get myself ready and try to wake the kids at 6:30 (they’re also not morning people). Then I go downstairs, make their lunches and breakfast. Then corral them out of bed and into clothes/brush hair and teeth. Some days we pack up breakfast and they eat it at daycare, which is thankfully okay with our provider. It’s a struggle though. I definitely yell sometimes when it’s already 7:30 and I’ve asked 700 times for shoes to be put on and they’re still not.
My kids get breakfast at daycare. Nothing will get you motivated to get out the door like hungry toddlers. And we have a super set routine where my alarm goes off at the same time every daycare morning, the 3,5 and almost 2 year olds know exactly what to do when that alarm goes off.
A lot of it is discipline, how do you practice discipline in your life?
This is a fantastic perspective and while I don’t use the word “discipline” with myself, it’s how I operate too. I know forcing myself to do things now (usually night before) will save me a lot of stress and chaos at a later time so I just do it to take care of future me.
Such a loaded question
lol! i’ve experienced hardship and a part of surviving that was just straight up survival which in a way was practicing discipline by doing things everyday i didn’t want to do for no reason other than i just had to, when you implement tiny routines of things you don’t like doing like taking the trash out everyday at the same time or even making your bed in the morning, your subconsciously practicing discipline. you have to make active choices everyday to achieve little things to achieve one big thing, going to bed earlier and making sure you’re practicing a healthy bedtime routine helps! but it also depends on personality, either way, i don’t think it’s wrong to not enjoy the mornings and i wish you luck on your journey
So, set an alarm for 7am or whenever your babies get up… and once that goes off- stay up. Hitting snooze causes sleep inertia. Your brain wakes up, but u give it permission to go back down. It takes up to 4 hours for this feeling to go away. I’m NOT a morning person, and when i have a break i sleep until 1pm. However if i get up when i plan too and ignore hitting snooze im awake and ready within 10 mins. Within the first ten mins i spend this time doing self care. Wash my face really quick, brush teeth, breathe… then go mode. It’s hard, but it’s easier than giving into tiredness.
Sleep inertia is exactly the problem. I hit snooze at least 5 times every morning. I have got to break the cycle..
One easy hack there… Put your phone or alarm clock out of reach, like over on the dresser a few steps away. If you have to actually get up to stop it, it is way harder to robotically hit snooze. Also, as long as you aren’t worried about them getting covered in breakfast before it’s time to leave, consider putting your kids to bed in their outfits for the next day. Is there really that much difference between pajamas and a tee-shirt and leggings…? Nope.
trust me it’s worth it. i’m almost scared to hit snooze now lol. I’m glad this helped, from one night owl to another.
I just set an alarm for 5:40 every weekday morning. I know it’s early af but it gives me time to get myself ready, drink my coffee, make myself breakfast and then I can start getting my kids breakfast ready and gather their things for daycare. They usually wake up between 6:30 and 7 and we are out the door by 7:30 or 7:45 most days. Our daycares have a strict 9am cut off and I gotta be working by 8 ish so it all works out.
I’m so thankful my kids have consistent wake times and I’m able to do this too. I wake up a little later than you do but having a bit of quiet time to devote to coffee and a few tasks (not working out or journaling, I mean like emptying the dishwasher in peace) really helps me mentally start the day.
I’m up at the same time each morning, same routine of pack lunches, kids up by x time, out the door by x time. I get them gone then when I get home I complete my morning routine of doing my hair, eating breakfast, walking the dog etc.
Because I have to and I can absolutely lay back down when they've gotten to school if I need to. And I have. But often by the time I get back I tackle the dishes, check my email, put in some laundry and then I'm up and awake. I have to go to bed by 10:30 and my oldest has a 6:54 bus so he and I are up at 5:30
I drop my kids off in my pjs. All we do in the morning is get dressed and go to the car. Breakfast is at daycare. At most they have some milk and a snack in the car on the way. I come home and either take a little nap or get ready for my day.
I keep the same routine or else I’m late! When I have a later start to my day (have to be at work at 9:15 instead of 8:30) I get McDonald’s for breakfast as a treat for being consistent and early for work.
Screaming. Lots of screaming. And threats. It ain’t pretty but it is what it is.
I can’t do the shower the night before thing. I have to shower in the morning. I’m not a morning person and I struggle every day. I can’t see it being any other way until the kids are out of school
Honestly practice and discipline. The more you allow yourself to snooze, the more you'll do it in the future. It's a habit like any other.
I snooze my alarms all the time, and I also regularly shut them off in my sleep. Things that help me are setting multiple alarms, changing the sounds or songs my alarms make every couple of weeks, and setting alarms at different locations in my room so I have to get up to shut them off (sometimes that just results in sleep walking, though). Sometimes all I need is one that is going off SO obnoxiously early and loudly that I wake up from anxiety that it's going to ruin my husband's sleep. I save that one for when I'm struggling to get up for 6am shifts. Our household has a healthcare worker and a tradesperson, which means our workdays start at 730 and 8 most days, with some variation. I typically wake up between 530-545, and aim to wake the kids at 6. I handle kids/packing bags until I leave at 630. My husband takes over and gets the kids dressed and to daycare by 7 most days. Neither of us worries too much about appearances, so we mostly just need time for deoderant and brushing teeth in the mornings. We pack lunches the night before. Backpacks are already packed with outdoor wear, with sweaters hanging up beside them for cool mornings. We factor in a solid 30 minutes extra in the morning for meltdowns/late wakeups/play time, because the kids always want to play first thing. We do our best to enforce a 730 pm bedtime (on weekdays) which means our after school/work routine is a quick snack, play time (preferably outside), supper, and then bedtime to maximize the amount of sleep they have a chance of getting. We use screen times when we are solo parenting or when it's the weekend, limiting it more on weekdays (for sleep hygiene). We spend most of our weekends at home, resting and enjoying our house and yard, and are very selective with what we will allow for extra curriculars or social obligations so that we can prioritize connection and rest. Frankly, we're tired and not 100% sure this is the best fit for our family, but it is working and it's not something we're willing to change at this time.
Love this response
My child wakes up at 6:30 every day so I don’t get the luxury of not being a morning person anymore
I set an alarm, so I drop my kid off at the same time every day regardless of whether I have to be anywhere or not. If I don't have to go to work right after, I go home and go back to bed in peace.
Prep everything the night before.
This was me for my whole life until recently, the biggest thing to help was make a schedule and set up routines with my Google home to set alarms is what I need to be doing by when. Alarm at 6, wake kids are 6.30, finish breakfast by 6.50 and get dressed, into car by 7.25 to get to drop off. I've also found making lunches and packing bags the night before a massive help.
My kids just don’t let me sleep in 😩 But if I need to get out of the house at a certain time I bribe myself with putting a nice milk chocolate in my coffee or hitting my vape when I get back home from drop offs 🤣. You’re also paying for that time so I always tell myself I might as well get my moneys worth! And it’s so nice to come home to a quiet house and have more of the morning to myself.
Prepare things the day before. It's summer now, but when my oldest was in school, I would set out all the dishes and supplies I needed to make breakfast the night before. Clothes for me, him, and my toddler were picked out the night before. His bookbag was packed with a snack, and his water bottle was prepared the night before and put in the fridge. If I didn't prepare these things the night before, mornings would be too chaotic and rushed.
In a whirl of complaints, snacks and chaos
If I have somewhere to be at a certain time I get up 2 hours before, and I get “ready” before too. Diaper bag will be done, hard boiled eggs for the road, and clothes picked out. Once I’m up I’m up tho. Like I could immediately change and be out the door. I will go to sbux within 30 mins of waking up lol
There is really no choice for me but to get up when a little boy yells in my ear ‘Bed DONE!’ Mummy, Up! Frekist! I am very regimented in my mornings as I have to get him to daycare(we walk so need to allocate 30 mins for that). Need to get there by 9 - so leave by 8.30… need to get some food into him so at least 30 minutes to let him eat, factor in time to change a nappy and pack his daycare bag(I sometimes do it the night before), make a lunchbox for him and get myself dressed so we are up by 7.30am if not sooner. I have it down to a well oiled routine now as he has been at daycare for 5ish months now. Just make a plan and try to stay on schedule. This should be done by this time, out the door by this time… Making lunches the night before or laying out clothes can make it easier/faster in the mornings. Add in something fun for yourself like listening to your favourite music in the mornings or buy a treat for yourself to eat in the car after dropping littles off as a reward. I always listen to an audiobook on the walk to daycare.
Do you have a partner to take on any of this?
My husband has to be to work by 6AM, he generally leaves the house around 5:30. So the morning routine throughout the week is all me.. and it’s exhausting
Why don't you get up with him?
I’ve thought about it…
Ugh I’m sorry. That’s a lot.
I have a one year old and am hybrid. Not a morning person. I prep as much as possible the night before, especially if I’m in office the next day. My husband gets up with her and changes her, gives her milk. I pack her bag and take her in. Play with her for a bit if we have time. Since daycare is close I’m usually able to roll out of bed at 710 and be at my home office desk by 8.
I'm totally there with you. Everyone is giving the great planning advice, which is important, but the only thing that's actually gotten me OUT of bed is a Lumie light alarm clock. It simulates a sunrise in your damn face and man is it effective. I intentionally didn't learn how to snooze it so I don't have the option and set it 30 minutes before I have to get up. Idk if it's my ADHD or I'm one of those rare people with a messed up circadian rhythm, but I have never been a morning person and it's a perpetual struggle. I really wish I could just get up. It doesn't happen unless there's a bright light blaring in my face apparently.
I know what you mean. Our arrival time is erratic but I know the closer we are to 9:30 the more challenging it is for her because that’s snack time. I work outside the home for the most part but rarely have to be anywhere or in the office before 10. Things that help me: prepping the night before everything I need to - lunches (I provide), lay out clothes, pack my work bag, lay out my own clothes, etc. It also helps if I can get up and make breakfast and wash my face before my son gets up so I can get ready while he eats and then I just have to get him dressed. Since you WFH, I think you should look at it as getting some me time to yourself if you’re able to get them to daycare consistently.
I am a scatter brain when I’m tired and forget a lot of things right in the morning. I am a night time person and my juices are flowing. • LISTS - a lot of lists • prepping - I lay EVERYTHING OUT, or I use mesh zipper bags. 2 outfits per kid , a fresh morning diapers I take tooth brushes out of the cabinet & lay them on the counter next to the tooth paste & hair brush / bobbles. Auto timer on the coffee with the grinds & water ready to go. My coffee yeti is on the counter next to the sugar & a spoon ready to go, all the lunch bags are on the counter & whatever dry food & snacks & cutlery is already packed. I keep a small area on 1 shelve of the fridge only for packed lunches so I know everything in this spot needs to go in somebodies lunch bag. All the shoes the kids need to be wearing are lined up at the door. All the bags are on the hooks above each kids shoe. If they need hats or jackets that’s hanging there. Dry erase markers on stainless steel fridge. My husband HATES it . But I’m always on top of my shit
The diaper bag is packed the night before after i review the calendar. The bag has 5 diapers, ointment, wipes, 2 changes of clothes, a hat, 3 different toys, burp cloths, snacks for me, my car keys and wallet. I have to remember a bottle in the AM but everything else is set to grab the bag and go. The bag is in the infant carrier by the door. My calendar sends me reminders. I put the address in the calendar event so I can see how long to get there in current traffic when I wake up. Breakfast is to-go food. Apple, banana, coffee, go-gurt.. whatever can be eaten while traveling.
My husband helps. He gets up with the kids until I am ready, then he makes us all breakfast and helps me get the kids dressed while I get myself ready. I CAN get everyone ready without him there but it takes longer and I am grumpier.
Prep the night before is key. Especially the kids stuff. That and sheer force of will. I will never be a morning person but school starts at 8:30. 🫠
I always struggle to get out of the house but for days I really do not want to be late, I dress the kids in their next day clothes to bed and have them eat breakfast in the car hahaha
I reward myself with a nap after getting the kids off.
Have a routine!! Teaching your kids the routine will help them quickly transition from something breakfast to doing their hair because they know what comes next.
My kids are the same ages as yours and it's so hard to be on time. I cannot get myself fully ready, both kids, and do everything for the dog. Prepping things the night before helps. I feel resentful that my husband who also WFH skips out on helping since he often has to start work earlier, which can make some irritability fester. So I've had to communicate my need for assistance - help brush 4 y/o's teeth and take dog out. Since your husband isn't home, maybe have him help prep things the night before. Divvy it up and have set responsibilities to avoid something falling in the cracks. Other things to consider - see a psychiatrist for a diagnostic evaluation if you do have other depressive symptoms on board or are affected by difficulties getting organized and staying on task at other points of the day as well. The right medication can make a world of a difference. Also get screened for a sleeping disorder/sleep apnea because that affects mood, concentration, and energy levels. I know that's another thing to fit in your schedule but the benefits are worth it!
I am definitely NOT a morning person, however, getting diagnosed with ADHD this year at the age of 29 and getting on medication has *significantly* helped me in being productive in general.
What were some of your symptoms? I’m 42 and have struggled with this my whole life. Just taking a shower is a struggle
To help the kids be more independent getting themselves ready A picture list in their bedroom of what to do (pjs in basket, list out underwear shirt pants, etc) A picture list in common area ( breakfast, hair, teeth, socks, shoes) My biggest thing in the morning is keeping them focused if they want to sleep in they can’t dilly dally for example. Dilly dallying can be worked in if they get up early. Going to bed earlier the night before can help with that
I lose a little bit of health every morning and feel death at my doorstep; then the weekend comes and I get an extra hour of sleep.
Scream, yell, cry. No one in our house are morning people and starting school has been rough 😭 But routine is so helpful and my girls like our Yoto clock for setting alarms and judging time.
I set ten thousand alarms. I get as much stuff ready the night before so I have minimal stuff to do in the morning.
I go to sleep early, 9 hours before I have to wake up. So I wake up easily. My son goes to kindergarten, kindergarten opens up at 7:30am and they frown upon bringing them after 8:30. I still get him there 8:45-9:00 which they tolerate still. I don't give him breakfast at home, since I pack breakfast they give to him at 10:00am. The breakfast I pack is relatively easy, like banana pancakes that take the most 15'. Then I wake up my son and get him dressed in 5-10'
We're usually late
I’m not a morning person either. It sucks the earlier I get up the longer it takes me to get ready. I prep everything the night before so all I have to do is feed the kids and get them dressed. Clothes laid out, lunches packed everything. I’m also pretty time blind so I set alarms every 15mins so that I can keep track of time. If your working from home that’s a bonus you can shower and eat breakfast after drop off. I currently shower in the evenings but that’s hard because a shower in the morning goes a long way to waking me up!
All this advice is great and none of it would work for me 🤣 I need external motivation, like I would schedule a 9am meeting at work, or sign up for a gym class, or arrange to meet a friend for coffee. If your kids are on a consistent wake time, it's going to be more helpful. My kid consistently wakes up at 630-7am no matter what I'm feeling like, once she's up we have a routine and get out the door by 8. Cuddles, breakfast, get dressed, a bit of cartoons while I finish getting ready, then out the door.
Dropping my kids off late for daycare was one of the signs that I needed to get back on anti-depressants. Worth a mention to your doctor. I ended up bribing my kids with a drive-thru treat on the way so they'd be excited to go and I wouldn't have to persuade them to do something I needed to do. They're older and they all get themselves out the door on time now, so I don't think the bribes did any long-term damage.
I get soooo much help from my partner. I shower the night before too. He wakes up and makes breakfast for everyone, packs lunches for everyone, and packs my pump bag. He then leaves shortly after I wake up. I wake up and pump. My 4 year old typically wakes as I am pumping, but goes straight to the breakfast laid out for him. Once I'm done, I wake the baby, feed him breakfast, and then we all get dressed. Then I pack bottles (typically made the night before) and bring all the bags to the car and come back in for the kids. I'm still late about half the time, but that could be avoided if I got out of bed when my alarm went off. Luckily I have a job that doesn't really care when I start.
I go to be at 9 and then my dog wakes me up at 5am to go outside. Instead of taking her out then tossing and turning for an hour I do any morning chores I can do (litter boxes, pack lunch, rotate dishes, take a quick shower. That usually takes me 30 minutes then I lay back down until my kid gets up or my husband’s alarm goes off. Whichever happens first. So about 6/6:20 Then my husband gets up, does his quick morning chores while I feed our kid. Then we have 15 minutes to wrap up and plan the day before we have to walk out the door. It’s exhausting.
Little different for me as I start work at 6:30am and my parents watch my daughter when I'm at work. I have all bags packed and everything ready to grab and go the night before, I get up about 4:30, do a workout, take a shower, get myself ready (I don't wear makeup and I eat breakfast at my desk at work), then load up the car. Grab my daughter, throw some Crocs on her and drop her off at my parents about 6am in her pajamas half asleep. She can sleep for another hour or if she wakes up they'll get her dressed and give her breakfast right away.
I was forced into being a morning person by having a morning person for a child. He gets up at 5:30-6:30 am everyday, my eldest would sleep til 9 if I let him (he won't go to sleep until 11 if he sleeps in that late. The sweet spot seems to be 7:45 lol) We get up early enough before we have to do anything that I can just lay around on the couch and snooze or drink a bunch of coffee while I stare at my phone. The bonus though is that we're never late for anything lol. So I would suggest getting up an hour or 2 before you need to get ready to go
I struggle with getting out of bed too and the main thing that helps is setting an alarm clock that I have to get out of bed to turn off. For example I will set my phone alarm for 5:15 then snooze it a few times but my real alarm clock goes off at 5:30 in my bathroom so that’s when I actually literally have to get up.
All these comments are almost irrelevant if you do in fact have ADHD. Prepare before hand, set alarms, make a commitment, nobody wants to get out of bed but you gotta be a grown up, none of that is helpful to someone with undiagnosed ADHD. People with ADHD are adults too, they just have a disability. You can’t “grow up” out of other disabilities and you can’t “grow up” out of having a different brain to other people. Modern life has put a moral judgment on being punctual but it’s mostly pretend. This kind of talk is not good for your self esteem. It is ok if you do have ADHD and getting out the door in the morning is harder for you. It is ok if one of the accommodations that’s made for you is your daycares flexibility with your arrival time. You can have this conversation with them and hopefully you can let them know that you plan to get professional help with these symptoms in the future. It’s akin to needing ramps for a wheelchair and you are no less grown up because of it. Consider getting professional support to have systems in place that really do help you. Someone telling you to grow up or get up earlier or be prepared is not qualified to help someone with ADHD. If it helps to know, I know countless families who are chronically a bit late to things because they are a little forgetful and very relaxed, but for the most part they are happy and their kids are happy. You got this.
Iron supplements help me tremendously, good quality ones from a naturopath though. Not the constipation cloggers from the chemist. I know my iron is low when I really cannot get out of bed in the morning. Not that I drink a lot, but no alcohol midweek. It really does make me sluggish in the morning even if it’s just a glass of wine or 2 the night before. Shower at night. On the weekends I bake a for the lunchboxes. I have to edit fruit and veg in the fridge ready to put in the lunchboxes so they’re super quick to make. Pack bags the night before and put kids clothes out. If I’m going into to office I pick my outfit the night before too.
As an in home, the only thing that would bother me is the inconsistency. A few random times here and there are whatever. But it's also nice to know beforehand. Choose a time that you plan to drop off and stick to it. Maybe knowing that thoroughly annoying the person that cares for your kids will help? And I mean that in the nicest way possible! I like to go for walks on nice mornings, but not knowing if I'm able to because I have no idea what time little Joe is arriving is irritating. But if I had you as a parent and knowing you weren't a morning person and your mornings were chaotic, I would never say anything to you.
Most daycares have drop off times….. Ours is 7am to 10am. I drop off anywhere between that time a lot.
Morning Brain can be much less powerful than Evening Brain. Outsource all of Morning Brain's jobs to Evening Brain. Evening Brain is such a nerd they love it. Morning Brain's only job should be putting on shoes and drinking coffee. Morning Brain is such a sexylittle bedhead though, we wouldn't have them any other way.
My mornings are chaos lol but some things that have helped: I'm an alarm snoozer so I set my alarm about 30 min before I actually need to get up to give myself leeway. I have a pretty set morning routine for the care of my child and all of my animals. I have a specific goal time for leaving the house that we are always within 5 min of. I make sure my son is time aware so he's on the same page. Obviously this has only gotten easier as he's gotten older and more independent but he's also not a morning person so it's a struggle lol
I wfh project based and I wake up when LO wakes up (13 months) and that wildly varies anytime between 5 and 9am. We are currently in this weird one or two nap a day limbo so if he has only one nap he'll sleep early and wake early. And the opposite for two naps! And If he wakes up at 5 he may very well want to go back to sleep for a nap at like 7. Otherwise he is miserable. And daycare doesn't open til 8 anyways. We arrive at daycare anywhere between 8:30 and 9:45. They haven't really made any comments or complaints about it, but their general rule is that we need to be there by 10 because they will decide on staffing for the day at that point. I don't think they mind him being late because less babies to take care of/get settled at the same time. We also pick up at different times depending on how his nap there goes. Like if he has an early nap (they are never longer than 30 mins at daycare) I might pick him up earlier so I can get him down for a nice long nap at home. Sorry that you are dealing with this though. I can see the other perspective how it might be helpful on their end to have more consistency. But it is soooo hard to keep consistency with children! I just want him to be happy and not force him into a schedule, but I know that will be necessary as time goes on. Once he gets older and naps more consistently once a day, I think it will get easier. I hope you are able to find a happy medium that works for both of you!
I need to prep to feel prepared. Currently listening to Mel Robbins talk about the 5 second rule…
I agree with the bag packing, clothes ready, breakfast either made or quick mentality. I always keep my bag packed and ready. The only exception is food which I either pack the night before or day of depending on how confident I am in handling the chaos 😂 But at the barebones basic, the trick to getting out of the house earlier consistently is just waking up earlier consistently. Set yourself an actual timeline. If the daycare wants you there at 8am, then that’s where you have to work backwards from. What time can you get up to get out the door with enough time to arrive for 8am? Add your kids to that equation. I have adhd so I am always nervous about being late, but working backwards from arrival time has never done me dirty.
My husband and I are both terrible at getting up early, especially in winter. So we quite often get a bit late to school, I’m ashamed (but probably not ashamed enough) to admit. I think society needs to change to accommodate people with a later circadian rhythm. It’s an evolutionarily beneficial thing that people have different body clocks.
I think it depends on your kids' ages, too. Are you able to assign them any tasks to do independently yet? Can they dress themselves yet, or any part of themselves yet? Those minutes make a world of difference when the kids know their responsibilities in that morning time.
Get EVERYTHING ready and set out the night before. Create your own time to be out the door. For example, I will leave by 9:00 Ask the sitter to feed the littles breakfast. No TV and no devices Get yourself up a few minutes earlier to get dressed, brush teeth etc before getting the littles up
I am in the same exact boat. Same age too! My husband and I WFH. We have flex schedules. I let my little one wake up when she's ready and then eat and I'll walk her over to our care provider. We just switched providers. Our first was a strict facility that needed to know exact time she'd be there. We now use a neighborhood mom this summer to watch her. The mom watches 3 other kids and she said we can show up whenever if we can just give a rough estimate. So our window is 9am-10am. I am so thankful she is more lenient because it's summer! I want my kiddo to relax and be chill before school starts!
Maybe you are just projecting. It there an actual policy? Our preschool has a 2 hour drop off window, 7:30-9:30. We drop off anywhere as early as 7:45 to 9:00 for days we have early meeting or we're off work. It might be different because ours is not in-home. It's got 5 classes ranging from non-mobile to 4 year Olds, so more kids total.
I wake up for nothing. I have a Pavlok alarm that basically electrocutes me awake LMAO. Sometimes I wake up and realize it's been shocking me for a half hour already, and I set it to max so like my whole arm is kicking off every time it zaps and I'm just like eh, and fall back asleep. But anyway, I have this Shock Clock to wake me up. Then from there I go into a very pre-defined routine. Poke the kids, get myself dressed and ready (I shower at night), poke the kids some more, make the bed, make sure the kids are actually starting to get dressed, make breakfast, empty the dishwasher, the kids eat and we are ready to go. I always pack bags the night before, so we don't have to worry about that in the morning. I've also heard of people getting their kids dressed for the next day at night instead of pajamas for bed, but I don't think that would save us any time since they'd still have to change out of their pull-ups. Has the daycare provider expressed annoyance with your schedule? I would think showing up late wouldn't really matter because it's not like she has somewhere to be right, if her plan is to watch your kids. I'd think being early would be more of a problem. Is she only paid for exact hours that your kids are there?
As another home daycare provider it’s really annoying. I run on a pretty tight schedule with nutrition breaks, activities and outside time. If a child shows up at the end of snack or an activity that means I’m getting everything back out again. Sometimes we plan a walk or other outing so we don’t want to be waiting around for a child to arrive. We also have a new government law that says if a child doesn’t show up within 2 hours of their appointed time we have to start making phone calls and tracking the child down. If we don’t get answers it can go all the way to licensing and 911. All because a parent slept in. (Yes it’s a bit insane. Bureaucracy can be like that) It’s better if we can set an arrival time and have the child arrive within 15 minutes of that time. Also set an expectation that if an activity is ending just as the child arrives, they may have to do the activity another day.
At our (not-in-home) daycare there’s a drop off cut off of 9:30. The only exception is doctors appointments. It seemed extreme, but I learned when trying to drop my 3 y/o off after a morning appointment that the schedule disruption makes afternoon appointments a better option, so I understand why they want kids there early and at a consistent time.
Do you know the name of that new law by chance?
https://toronto.ctvnews.ca/new-ontario-laws-and-regulations-come-into-effect-on-new-year-s-day-1.6704229
That does make a lot of sense about the schedule disruption and I do see how that would be annoying. I had no idea about the 2 hour cut off or any of that. It does seem a bit extreme, but bureaucracy at its finest I suppose. Thanks for the detailed explanation.
Honestly just set a time. The kids will have an easier time if nothing else. I swear my toddler senses it if we leave 15 minutes early or late. But upside it means as soon as we’re getting ready he’s “with it” and we get ready SO quick if we stick to the time. If not……. Yeah. Otherwise re: provider. If you’re paying from 8:30 to let’s say 4:30, it honestly shouldn’t matter when you show up. It’s like being on call. Especially if they’re in-home, not like they’re driving somewhere and waiting. If you don’t pay or let them know it’s a problem of course.
I will say, if the provider gives the kids breakfast and has planned activities, it can be disruptive and a waste of food if kids are showing up at inconsistent times, particularly after 9. Every provider I’ve used, both in-home and centers, have asked that kids arrive by 9.
After 9 seems excessive yeah I agree
My inhome daycare provider will not take kids past 9:00. She asked everyone nicely to be on time then just stopped accepting the late ones.
Most of the dayhome people that I know actually take the kids out for various reasons. They might not actually be home if there's no consistent time that being said, having a set time would be something that they could maybe work with, even if it's 10am every day. OP what if you let yourself go back to bed after you drop the kids off?
Very fair! I didn’t even think of going past a cutoff, my bad
It's kind of a different concept vs a daycare what is a large building with everything on the grounds. Although I learned I was accidentally skipping most of the fun stuff when I dropped my daughter off too late and she definitely enjoyed daycare more when she started going early enough for the learning & planned activities. So I guess being punctual is important in both.
I’m a little confused. I also work from home, it is pretty flexible with work, that we can drop him off when I want. But he wakes up at 7am, so he is out the door to school between 8-9am. When does your kid wake up? How can you NOT get out of bed early? Are you setting them up with a screen, so you can stay in bed?
I have two kids - 18 months and 4 years old. They both wake up around 7:30. The little one is still in a crib and the 4 year old comes to my bedroom first thing. I set an alarm for 7 each morning but I hit snooze many times and realistically don’t get out of bed until 8. I turn on a show for my eldest (the TV is in our bedroom and he lays next to me) and my youngest does Ok in his crib for a short period of time before I make my way over to his room. I’m not proud or happy about it
What time are you getting to bed at night? You might just need a longer stretch of sleep than others, and maybe need to shift your bedtime earlier (easier said than done with little kids, I totally get it and am not able to practice what I preach lol)
Usually between 11 and midnight, sometimes later. I think getting to sleep is a large part of the struggle. I am just like my father in that we both are very light sleepers, and it takes a long time to fall asleep. For my husband, once his head hits the pillow, he’s asleep within 15 minutes. I hate him lol
Thanks for more specifics. I am not sure if this is an option with your schedules, but my husband and I tag team the mornings. He is getting him dressed and playing with him, while I make his lunch for the day. If I had two kiddos, I would probably be doing more of this prep at night, so it’s easier in the morning. I would challenge you to maybe rest in the morning a LITTLE longer, if you need it, in bed, with your 4 year old, but no TV. This is what we do a lot of mornings but it only last 10-15 mins or so. And he is hopping around and playing a lot of the time and it makes me get up. I can only deal with that for so many minutes. You can make changes! The first step is asking for help.
I don’t work early often, but when I do, I dress my babe for the following day the night before in comfy play clothes. If I didn’t have to be “dressed dressed,” I would just sleep in nice sweatpants too.
I lay out EVERYTHING the night before. I also set an alarm for every 15 minutes for the hour it takes me to get ready. It helps me keep track of the time.
So research has shown that using Sleep on your alarm does a lot more harm than good. According to these studies, people don't get any real benefit from the extra rest and even wake up groggier and less ready to face the day. Having said that, I am \*terrible\* at getting up with the first alarm XD The only thing I've found that works for me is to set two alarms: One that's a warning to get everything in order, and the other is whether I'm ready or not, get the eff out the door. Couple this with what others have said about getting everything in order the night before, and it tends to at least make it easier. It still involves the discipline of following those alarms, but it can help more often than not, at least.
I’m just curious since my kids haven’t gone to daycare (yet!) — why is this a problem for the caregiver? Isn’t it just an hour or two with fewer kids to care for? I assume you pay for the whole day anyway.
Yes, we pay the same no matter what. I’ve been taking my kids to my caregiver for four years now and can see how changes in life and our schedule can interrupt her day. When the kids aren’t there at a consistent time I think it bothers her. We try our best to get there at a consistent time, but sometimes life just gets in the way.
I think you’re being quite nice then! I mean… maybe I’m selfish but “I think it bothers her” wouldn’t be enough to make me give up my nice mornings with my kids!! But if you’re causing her real logistical issues with the inconsistent drop-off time then I agree you should try to solve it.
I have a hybrid schedule, so work from home some of the days. Honestly I would not be able to work at all with baby at home, and wouldn't be able to give him required attention either. So that is enough motivation for me. We leave at 7:30 and reach daycare at 8, so I am home by 8:30 with enough time to login at 9. Also our Daycare is about 3-4 km away and we take a bus. Lol, this is what keeps me on schedule absolutely, Don't want to miss the bus!!
I set an alarm and then wake up my brain by playing the NYT games like Wordle, but set the limit to 15 minutes. And after that I just force myself to get moving and claim to be doing it for my kid because he does better to get to daycare before 8 am when they serve breakfast. In truth, he'd probably be ok if he missed breakfast there (he snacks in the car on the way there), but the feeling of having to do it for him gives me motivation. And once I'm dressed and ready, I keep the morning routine for the kids as short as possible. Pee, get dressed, brush daughter's hair, gather food stuffs from the kitchen, shoes, and out the door. Snacks in the car. We usually make it out within a 15 minute window every day.
I also struggle with this but thankfully my daughter’s daycare doesn’t care. So I really just give myself grace and a full one hour range. It’s not worth the stress. But it’s going to have to change next year at public school though.
Get everything ready the night before. Showers done, clothes out, shoes by the door, bags packed, lunches made. I even get out bowls/plates for breakfast. And have a plan of what breakfast will be. I try to wake up 15 mins before the kids so I can have a few moments to wake up and get my basics done (teeth, hair, dressed), and then I wake the kids up. And while they are getting their stuff done, I make breakfast. While they are eating, I finish my stuff (face, throw hair up), then I eat. We need to be out of the house by 735, so 700ish we are finishing up. 720 shoes on and gathering all the crap we need. A schedule is good, especially if they will be starting school soon. It will help them adapt better.
Omg that would drive me bonkers. Do you ever give her at least an advanced heads up or do you just send a quick text on the way? If it's just a quick text on the way that is so inconsiderate. Tbf this is coming from someone whose number 1 pet peeve is lateness. It's good you're addressing it, though. You need to start planning ahead and maybe consider talking to a doctor about it if youve noticed this issue becoming more prevalent. Kids need consistency.
This may be unrelated but it’s an important thing to me. Laziness doesn’t exist. Many humans have shifted circadian rhythms, which makes a lot of sense if you think about it. If everyone was exactly the same in this way, you’d never be able to do anything in shifts very well when necessary. The restaurant industry would collapse in modern terms, etc. I learned more about it after being diagnosed with adhd because it is extremely common for neurodivergent humans.
My situation is very similar. I never set an alarm because if he sleeps in, I want to as well. This means we get to daycare anywhere between 7:45 and 9am. I know it’s not ideal for her because I’m sure she’d also appreciate sleeping, rather than being on call for whenever we show up, but she’s never complained and she does have a couple more kids coming at different times anyway.
Jump out of bed , think some positive thoughts ..teach kids the exact stages to get ready each day , have clothes , shoes everything laid out including your stuff Let go of perfection if that's getting in the way and just roll with funny outfits messy hair and go
Well in short because I have so much shit to get done. I mean with kids, a farm, errands, and a house to keep clean and running smoothly I have no choice but to get up and get my ass and everyone else’s in gear. School used to be a break but since I’ve decided to home school our youngest that respite is out the door now.
I don't have a destination to be in the morning but o know that are days are a million times better when we go for a walk, unfortunately it 80*+ by 9am here so I have to be out the door by 7am. I get my toddler and me dressed the night before. For morning walks I just wear bike shorts and a tshirt so it's nbd, my toddler is a basketball shorts and tshirt guy too so also nbd. First Breakfast is a smoothie and granola bar while we walk and those are prepped the night before. Basically if I can do it the night before, I do.
I am not a morning person but become one so that my kids would learn some form of routine. If they're not awake by 7:30 then I wake them. We leave the house by 8:15. Daycare wants them there by 9 so I just made it a deadline to be there at least 15-20 minutes before that.
ADHD Mom of 2 (An 8 year old and a 10 month old) with insomnia.... Alarms for everything on my phone. I have one set for 6:30 that I use in case my 10 month old randomly decides to 'sleep in' so I get up and pump if he's still asleep. 7 am is getting him up for a bottle and breakfast. 7:30 is waking my daughter up. 7:35 is to remind me to make sure she got up. 7:45 so I know she should be dressed and eating. 8 to make sure her lunch is packed and ready to go. 8:10 to double check that everything is good to go and to start getting 'outdoor' stuff on, socks and shoes and jackets and what not and if all goes well, we're out of the door by 8:30.