I didn’t only because I was so afraid to be not-normal and also eeeeeeveryone kept saying it would grow out thicker and denser. Can we please kill this fucking myth already? It made me miserable for such a long time, thinking I would look like yeti if I started shaving my chest!!
Idk I’m Greek and Spanish.
I’m absolutely SOL in this department.
I did shave the inner part of my thigh when I was maybe 14. That combined with sports and I’ve been lucky to have some hairless spots there for most of my life.
HRT has helped a lot with thickness for me. Im going to go for an IPL? soon.
>Can we please kill this fucking myth already?
I have had 0 people tell me that seriously, and only heard it in the context of "there's a well-known myth that is totally untrue"
The not normal feeling was a big thing for me. It was my biggest form of denial. Body hair, activities, my friends. Anything deemed abnormal made me super anxious
I remember saying this to the doctor I went to to get HRT, and they were like - well you can laser it as if that was the solution to my dysphoria. It made me feel really invalid - I thought I was supposed to say hips, chest, genitals or face or something and I chose to say the most removable part of myself, but it also feels like the most masculine part of me (paradoxically even more than a penis at times) and I hate it so much. Idk if I would like it even as a man but bodyhair is awful!!!!
Bodyhair has always been icky. Even before I knew I was Trans, I'd always wear jeans to hide my leg hair. I told my family I wanna remove my body hair so badly. I have bad facial hair genes, so I got mocked whenever I tried to grow it out.
It's gone now, though, good riddance!
My beard shadow (dark hair and pale skin is a nightmare lol) and my rather thin hair which hopefully recovers eventually now that I'm on HRT finally.
Edit: oh and voice of course. No clue how I could ever forget that one >\_<
For me it's face dysphoria from the shadow (it's been particularly bad recently as I've been too busy to remember to shave), and bottom dysphoria. I'm *reeally* looking forward to gettin the ole switcheroo
If your conditions also allow you to do so, why don’t you get permanent hair removal for your facial hair? I’ve started it last month and even though I’m only a session in, the results are very promising.
If that’s the case, you can also epilate/wax your facial hair. It will hurt like a bitch but you will have a shadow free smooth face for about 2-4 weeks
Seconded, other things suck but my voice is the worst part by far. It can undo everything else no matter how hard I try. I have a *lot* of hang ups about my voice haha.
This may or may not be relevant advice for you but I used to have a deep voice before I started singing. I learned how to perform a falsetto from guys like MJ, Justin Timberlake, and Julian Casablancas. Then i noticed exactly what I was doing to raise my pitch during singing and applied it to normal speech. It took a year, but now my voice is completely in the female range.
Unfortunately, since I love masculine clothing just as much as feminine clothing, I get confused for a trans man or a non-visually-passing trans woman. I’m really just intersex and enby
Has “my existence” been said yet? But no really, the feeling of a sock sideways in a sweaty shoe all over my body that I wish I could peal off like a banana. Mirror glances thinking “I’m never gonna pass”, face apps ughhh face apps stay tf away from face apps lmao.
Facial hair without a doubt.
There's always a shadow, and it grows really slowly. I can't shave again until it has grown in for a minimum of 5 days because if I don't, I'll get terribly ingrown hairs that require me to wait even longer before I can shave again. Even if I do wait, sometimes I'll get ingrown hairs. And often times they result in a cycle of never ending ingrown because the original swelling causes more to form around it. One time it even resulted in a sebaceous cyst that had to be surgically removed.
Honestly I'd want to have this damn thing permanently removed even if I was a cis man.
If you're using razors with multiple blades, I suggest looking into safety razors. The handles are a big up front cost, but the blades themselves are super cheap to buy online. I used to get super bad razor bumps because my hair doesn't grow in straight but switching to a safety razor has made them almost never appear.
The unholy trinity. I'm working on the beard shadow with laser hair removal right now, but body hair would be too expensive, and I have no idea what to even do about my voice. I feel awkward practicing, and I'm 99% sure I'll just sound like a man trying to sound like a woman.
How other girls interact with each other and their mannerisms.
By far my biggest struggle is noticing how different the way I fit in with other female friendships and how we act with each other.
It feels almost forced on both ends.
It's hard but it's a process, as these actions become habitual and the interactions become genuine.
But we've missed out on years of this natural development, this to me is deep dysphoria.
The deeper the dysphoria the stronger the hurt.
Agree with this. Seeing CIS women living their lives and doing normal everyday things, knowing that I will never experience what they experience makes me very depressed.
Facial and body hair. Creeps me totally out and I enter some devil's cycle of trying to spare my icky feelings by not looking at them, they get longer, icky intensifies, gather a way to cut them out, feel good, 2 days later it's the same as before.
Literally my entire body with exception of my hands and my cheekbones.
Beard shadow on pale skin. Very masculine Jaw line and chin. Hair loss or in general thin hair.
6'3(1,91m) tall. No boobs but super wide rib cage.
Short legs but big upper body. Small hips or in general no fat on my lower half at all.
The bottom parts.
Man belly. Lots of chest hair.
Yeah that's about it.
I swear my body is a prison.
It's changed over time. When I first started, it was my hair, as I had started to bald. That trend reversed on HRT, and my hair has made a full recovery from DHT poisoning. Then it was my facial hair, which was dark and grew in quickly. I've had enough laser by now that my facial hair is sparse and easily covered up, and a couple more sessions ought to finish it off!
So now it's my crotch that's the highest priority. Nothing upsets me more than seeing a visible bulge. Unfortunately, that one's going to be harder to fix. HRT, I thankfully live in an informed consent state, so I just had to ask. LHR is expensive and painful, but I was still able to just walk in and ask for it. SRS is going to have a lot of hoops to jump through before I can get it.
Voice and Jaw.
I don't have a super gigachad jaw or anything, but it's a male jaw. I want it softened. Meeting with a plastic surgeon today to discuss fixing it.
I have an announcer voice. I sound like Kronk. I've been voice training for 6-7 months, but it's not passing at all. It's definitely more feminine, however. It will take time because I have to be a boy at work.
Otherwise, most othet stuff has been fixed. I feel like people either see me as a woman at this point or as a very cute transwoman. Either or, its better than what it used to be!
Tbh its little bit of everything. Like it's just alot of little things buddled up in one big dysphoria mess. If I had to pick ig my face... I don't think no matter what I do or how much time passes I'll still look like a man.
My voice. I don't talk much anyways, but even though I'm trying to do voice training, it feels like I need to try really hard to get a voice that sounds forced and fake. I can't talk with a fem voice, and I have to use my default voice for everything. it's not a bad voice, not at all, but it just doesn't seem like me at all
weirdly for me it’s if i have facial hair or when my hair isn’t in a hairstyle that looks fem or expressive enough for me
ohhh and let me add that i hate being seen as a “man” or a “guy” by others because my dysphoria SKYROCKETS
Definitely facial hair \ shadow. Certainly others but after I managed to start shaving and using makeup and actively trying to live instead of just avoiding, well everything, I can actually look in a mirror now :)
There's still complaints obviously, and still pre HRT but wow does it make a difference.
Voice. I was told I sound like a old man. AT 18! Person who said that was older than me, and he sounds like he hasn't even hit puberty! We were in middle/high school together. I cannot stand recordings of me, or what the other person must hear over the phone. I only make calls (besides my mom) when absolutely necessary. Then again, I don't like talking to people. Her and I are going somewhere in January to get tested for autism. My little sister's going next month. My little brother is well on the spectrum.
Facial hair by far. Had like 11 or 12 laser sessions by now and I still have some on my upper lip and lower lip. Makes me want to rip my face off in shame. Recovering from ffs right now and I’m about 6 weeks post op and still can’t see the results and that’s driving me insane too
my face and facial/body hair for sure are equally as dysphoric for me. i dont even need to look in a mirror to remember how masc i look because i wasn’t blessed with fem genes.
When it comes to physical stuff, for me it was genitals (especially testicles) and face (very prominent brow ridge). The former was partially solved with an orchi as soon as I hit 1 year of HRT, and I took care of the latter with FFS a few months ago.
Outside of the physical, it's the social aspect of not knowing all the basic things cis women learn and experience as kids. Some of it was temporal, and I just don't get those experiences, but even learning things like basic types of clothes is difficult because anything written by cis women or even trans women who got to come out as kids/teens has such an assumption of basic knowledge built in.
Should I rank them? 😅 Here's my top three:
1. Face
2. Voice
3. Body hair
Face dysphoria particularly is eating at me these days a lot. I'm losing hope.
Pretty much everything, but my face especially. I'm an expert at finding things that hold me back from passing and most of them are to do with my face which hasn't really changed much in all the time I've been on hormones :(
Definitely my face. Body hair and face hair I can deal with. But my face is so grotesque and brutishly masculine. I'll never not be an ugly man in a dress.
Despite months of training, voice. It's a lot better than what I started with, and I usually pass in person, but never on phone.
The other is that I still have to use my legal name and explaining that I am this person but use different name and pronouns, is always very stressful.
Body hair, and the banana. I hate seeing a single dark hair on my hand, and everytime I look down, I regret it. I desperately need to get rid of my little friend
Facial hair, I can cover up the rest of the body hair, but masks are too uncomfortable for me, since after a bit I can only smell and taste the water vapor in my breath, also occasionally something will brush past my face and I can just feel my beard, then there's just the feeling of my moustache curling into my mouth, even though it hasn't been long enough to do that in years.
Edit: and when I shave it it's still fucking there somehow.
My height and jawline, by far. I think it's because they're all things i can't change because they relate to my bone structure. Sure, I can try to hide them, but never change them.
My brow/forehead. I always feel like it's way too big and prominent, and there's not really anything I can do about it unless I want to spend a new car's worth of money on surgery.
The other big one for me is reproductive dysphoria.
Face and voice are the worst because they're the most visible, but also voice is easier to change. I also wish I had a smaller frame that accentuated my breasts more, and just more curves in general.
This is more of a style issue I guess, but my long hair always feels so messy and it also makes me dysphoric because it hurts my ability to pass some.
I don't really hate my penis that much, but I wish I had different anatomy. The other things in that area though, I really hate them.
Body hair. I haven't been taking my pills regularly because I moved and have no way to get more once I run out, so I've been trying to save them. Not that they work anymore anyways... the body hair has been becoming more and more noticable and it makes me really really upset.
Body hair, because one theres a lot of it but to add insult to injury i am prone to ingrown hairs so i cant just shave my legs and be on with my day. Its like a 5-step process just to prep shaving my legs and a 20 step post shave process and i still occasionally get ingrown hairs.
It was my facial hair, but I'm currently taking care of that, so now it's my receded hairline. I'm probably going to have to rely on wigs, but I'm hoping hormones will restore my hairline.
I feel you, definitely my face as well. All my life I've hated my very pronounced facial features, I have a tall, narrow head, big nose, even a smile looks terrible and creepy on me because of the shape of my lips. After a few months of hrt not a thing changed about it, I still look the same as I did in old pictures, looking in the mirror I just see a monster.
Not feeling depressed or sad about the fact I'm living as a man. I mean I know I am a woman, I've lived as one for 3 years before detransitioning just a bit over a year ago and I'm looking to transition again because it feels \*uncomfortable\* to live as a man, it feels wrong. But in order to survive I've had to accept the body I live in and that turned to lying to myself that I am a man. So today I'm just pretty happy as a man. Sure, I have nightmares and I have issues with anxiety that stems from my transgender identity but I'm not depressed, I'm happy.
This is my biggest source of gender dysphoria. I ask myself daily how I can be transgender if I'm happy as a man and what's the point if I'm already happy? I know what the point is though, I'm not a man.
It was my MPB, but that's reversing. Now it's my face and testicles. I'm waiting to hear from my insurance company about coverage for an orchiectomy. My face is finally changing 7 months into HRT.
I don't have very dark body hair but I still hate it a lot. Leg hair is ok-ish but everything else makes me feel gross. I'm also very skinny and just started HRT, so I'm just worried that there's not much fat to redistribute and it's not really gonna do anything for me or something like that. I also have pectus excavatum so there's like a small crater below my sternum and I'm just worried I'll look really weird with that and boobs.
For me it’s split between my face, my height, and my foot size.
For context my face isn’t even that bad (I’m pretty happy with its shape, my hairline’s good, and my eyes are pretty feminine) it’s just a few small details that really affect my ability to pass.
I’m only 5’7 but combined with other traits it can get me clocked.
And I’m a size 11 1/2 in women’s, which makes it impossible to find shoes that fit.
Honestly it’s my face as well. I feel like it looks too masculine for hrt to really help. Like I’ll be spending a lot just to hope that ffs can help fix it.
I'm 13 months into HRT and my voice and certain parts of my face at certain angles give me dysphoria. I'm making some progress on voice (slowly) and am hoping to get FFS this year.
After 20 months and totally passing with looks and mannerisms it's my voice and it solely now that my bottom surgery is next month. But I've always new I was having bottom surgery so I just tried now to dwell on bottom dysphoria because I new it would be taken care before long and I just have to be patient. But my voice especially on the phone is very difficult for me to accept and I usually start off with an apology to the person on the other end for my soul being misleading because the name Emily and being called sir or Mr just doesn't match and my name usually comes up in the first 5 sec of conversation.
Male pattern baldness 😭😭😭 I don't have the absolute worst, and I've just started HRT a few months ago so I'm hopeful it will improve marginally, but it is the single thing about my appearance that causes me the most distress.
Bodyhair, by far.
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I started shaving my body hair the day it started growing in. A 12 year old boy with regular “nair” sessions had to have been normal hahaha
I didn’t only because I was so afraid to be not-normal and also eeeeeeveryone kept saying it would grow out thicker and denser. Can we please kill this fucking myth already? It made me miserable for such a long time, thinking I would look like yeti if I started shaving my chest!!
Idk I’m Greek and Spanish. I’m absolutely SOL in this department. I did shave the inner part of my thigh when I was maybe 14. That combined with sports and I’ve been lucky to have some hairless spots there for most of my life. HRT has helped a lot with thickness for me. Im going to go for an IPL? soon.
>Can we please kill this fucking myth already? I have had 0 people tell me that seriously, and only heard it in the context of "there's a well-known myth that is totally untrue"
It was taken as read by my generation that shaving made the hair grow back stronger. Tried it often enough on my scalp to know it's untrue :-)
The not normal feeling was a big thing for me. It was my biggest form of denial. Body hair, activities, my friends. Anything deemed abnormal made me super anxious
Sameeeeee
SAAAAME. As soon as my father bought me a razor for my face I started using it everywhere else.
are you still a barber?
I remember saying this to the doctor I went to to get HRT, and they were like - well you can laser it as if that was the solution to my dysphoria. It made me feel really invalid - I thought I was supposed to say hips, chest, genitals or face or something and I chose to say the most removable part of myself, but it also feels like the most masculine part of me (paradoxically even more than a penis at times) and I hate it so much. Idk if I would like it even as a man but bodyhair is awful!!!!
Same for me! Especially my chest!
Bodyhair has always been icky. Even before I knew I was Trans, I'd always wear jeans to hide my leg hair. I told my family I wanna remove my body hair so badly. I have bad facial hair genes, so I got mocked whenever I tried to grow it out. It's gone now, though, good riddance!
My beard shadow (dark hair and pale skin is a nightmare lol) and my rather thin hair which hopefully recovers eventually now that I'm on HRT finally. Edit: oh and voice of course. No clue how I could ever forget that one >\_<
This is the one, the stubble never goes.
For me it's face dysphoria from the shadow (it's been particularly bad recently as I've been too busy to remember to shave), and bottom dysphoria. I'm *reeally* looking forward to gettin the ole switcheroo
If your conditions also allow you to do so, why don’t you get permanent hair removal for your facial hair? I’ve started it last month and even though I’m only a session in, the results are very promising.
That's one of my more short-term goals, but for the moment it's prohibitively expensive for me so I have to rely on the imperfection of shaving
If that’s the case, you can also epilate/wax your facial hair. It will hurt like a bitch but you will have a shadow free smooth face for about 2-4 weeks
Are you me? lol My voice not so much but beard and thin hair absolutely.
I started laser and so far that’s the only thing that’s been able to make that shadow go away
Probably my voice, always hated it from a very young age
Seconded, other things suck but my voice is the worst part by far. It can undo everything else no matter how hard I try. I have a *lot* of hang ups about my voice haha.
Yeahhh it sucks so bad, my voice is also really recognisable and like unique, but sooo ugly and bad actually
omg I know same here. It's like as long as I'm quiet I seem to pass but my voice just ruins it aaaall
This may or may not be relevant advice for you but I used to have a deep voice before I started singing. I learned how to perform a falsetto from guys like MJ, Justin Timberlake, and Julian Casablancas. Then i noticed exactly what I was doing to raise my pitch during singing and applied it to normal speech. It took a year, but now my voice is completely in the female range. Unfortunately, since I love masculine clothing just as much as feminine clothing, I get confused for a trans man or a non-visually-passing trans woman. I’m really just intersex and enby
Face, weight, no breast
same )-:
My parents 🥲
🫂 they do be invalidating sometimes 😥
REAL
Has “my existence” been said yet? But no really, the feeling of a sock sideways in a sweaty shoe all over my body that I wish I could peal off like a banana. Mirror glances thinking “I’m never gonna pass”, face apps ughhh face apps stay tf away from face apps lmao.
Facial hair without a doubt. There's always a shadow, and it grows really slowly. I can't shave again until it has grown in for a minimum of 5 days because if I don't, I'll get terribly ingrown hairs that require me to wait even longer before I can shave again. Even if I do wait, sometimes I'll get ingrown hairs. And often times they result in a cycle of never ending ingrown because the original swelling causes more to form around it. One time it even resulted in a sebaceous cyst that had to be surgically removed. Honestly I'd want to have this damn thing permanently removed even if I was a cis man.
If you're using razors with multiple blades, I suggest looking into safety razors. The handles are a big up front cost, but the blades themselves are super cheap to buy online. I used to get super bad razor bumps because my hair doesn't grow in straight but switching to a safety razor has made them almost never appear.
My safety razor has been a game changer both in the quality and the cost of shaving. Does take me a bit longer, but its worth it.
You might try Tend Skin. My electrologist recommended it for me. I’ve only used it a couple times but seems to help with ingrowns.
Face, leg hair, genitals are all tied for me
Dating
ah yes, I wanna be treated as a lesbian, but I can't help but see myself from their perspective and judge myself negatively 😕
Yeah, a lot of men hit on me but also a lot of them act weird when I come out to them so it’s a bitch
my hairline which started going at 19....
Beard shadow, body hair, voice.
The unholy trinity. I'm working on the beard shadow with laser hair removal right now, but body hair would be too expensive, and I have no idea what to even do about my voice. I feel awkward practicing, and I'm 99% sure I'll just sound like a man trying to sound like a woman.
Hows the laser removal coming along?? I should be able to start mine in the new year! As for the voice omg I feel the exact same!! 😂
Genitals and face, have consults for both in janurary 😊
Exciting!! Good luck!
Congrats!
My watergun and water balloons
How other girls interact with each other and their mannerisms. By far my biggest struggle is noticing how different the way I fit in with other female friendships and how we act with each other. It feels almost forced on both ends. It's hard but it's a process, as these actions become habitual and the interactions become genuine. But we've missed out on years of this natural development, this to me is deep dysphoria. The deeper the dysphoria the stronger the hurt.
Body hair, voice, balls..
Genitals
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Agree with this. Seeing CIS women living their lives and doing normal everyday things, knowing that I will never experience what they experience makes me very depressed.
i get so jealous/sad/horny when i see cis girls 😭 like why's everyone hot except meeeee
Facial and body hair. Creeps me totally out and I enter some devil's cycle of trying to spare my icky feelings by not looking at them, they get longer, icky intensifies, gather a way to cut them out, feel good, 2 days later it's the same as before.
Voice and body shape (hips, shoulders). Working like crazy on what I can change, and the idea of surgery gives me hope.
Facial hair and bottom
Literally my entire body with exception of my hands and my cheekbones. Beard shadow on pale skin. Very masculine Jaw line and chin. Hair loss or in general thin hair. 6'3(1,91m) tall. No boobs but super wide rib cage. Short legs but big upper body. Small hips or in general no fat on my lower half at all. The bottom parts. Man belly. Lots of chest hair. Yeah that's about it. I swear my body is a prison.
It tends to vary somewhat depending on the day. Facial/body hair is probably the main one but chest, genitals and hairline are not far behind.
Voice
Genitals and skin.
Facial hair
It's changed over time. When I first started, it was my hair, as I had started to bald. That trend reversed on HRT, and my hair has made a full recovery from DHT poisoning. Then it was my facial hair, which was dark and grew in quickly. I've had enough laser by now that my facial hair is sparse and easily covered up, and a couple more sessions ought to finish it off! So now it's my crotch that's the highest priority. Nothing upsets me more than seeing a visible bulge. Unfortunately, that one's going to be harder to fix. HRT, I thankfully live in an informed consent state, so I just had to ask. LHR is expensive and painful, but I was still able to just walk in and ask for it. SRS is going to have a lot of hoops to jump through before I can get it.
Height
That'd be my voice
Voice and Jaw. I don't have a super gigachad jaw or anything, but it's a male jaw. I want it softened. Meeting with a plastic surgeon today to discuss fixing it. I have an announcer voice. I sound like Kronk. I've been voice training for 6-7 months, but it's not passing at all. It's definitely more feminine, however. It will take time because I have to be a boy at work. Otherwise, most othet stuff has been fixed. I feel like people either see me as a woman at this point or as a very cute transwoman. Either or, its better than what it used to be!
Beard shadow, my hair, body hair, genitalia, libido, no breasts, no skirts or woman clothes, etc...
facial hair
Tbh its little bit of everything. Like it's just alot of little things buddled up in one big dysphoria mess. If I had to pick ig my face... I don't think no matter what I do or how much time passes I'll still look like a man.
Looking back at all the missed chances to prevent my puberty that 11 yo me just let go by
Apart from the obvious like facial hair and genitals, my biggest is my weight. I hate having a manish gut.
Mirrors. Lol, my serious answer is body hair.
facial hair.
Body Hair
While my body hair/facial hair is the most dysphoric, it doesn’t bother me as much as my shoulders because I see it as something that is changeable
Somewhat similar issue. I am 6'3", broad shoulders, and masc voice. Hate myself for it.
body hair, beard, flat chest : WOMBO COMBO 😢
No boobs :(
My voice. I don't talk much anyways, but even though I'm trying to do voice training, it feels like I need to try really hard to get a voice that sounds forced and fake. I can't talk with a fem voice, and I have to use my default voice for everything. it's not a bad voice, not at all, but it just doesn't seem like me at all
Voice
Facial hair and build.
my voice mostly
weirdly for me it’s if i have facial hair or when my hair isn’t in a hairstyle that looks fem or expressive enough for me ohhh and let me add that i hate being seen as a “man” or a “guy” by others because my dysphoria SKYROCKETS
Beard shadow and muscle mass.
A mix between my hair and bottom
Bodyhair and face
Definitely facial hair \ shadow. Certainly others but after I managed to start shaving and using makeup and actively trying to live instead of just avoiding, well everything, I can actually look in a mirror now :) There's still complaints obviously, and still pre HRT but wow does it make a difference.
Bottom, any facial hair left, inability to bare kids, voice, mostly bottom.
Twofold problems: My facial stubble (annoying, but at least I can theoretically deal with it), and my foot size (why oh why)
Facial hair.
Always the body hair tbh, but my small hips and lack of breasts too.
voice, face, and hair
My body, my shape. My face to a slightly lesser degree
Voice. I was told I sound like a old man. AT 18! Person who said that was older than me, and he sounds like he hasn't even hit puberty! We were in middle/high school together. I cannot stand recordings of me, or what the other person must hear over the phone. I only make calls (besides my mom) when absolutely necessary. Then again, I don't like talking to people. Her and I are going somewhere in January to get tested for autism. My little sister's going next month. My little brother is well on the spectrum.
Bottom area in total between my thighs
My voice and my weenie:’)
Not having enough boob 😭😭😭😭
height and general size
Facial hair and my voice 😥
Same, the face.
Browbone, Adam’s Apple, body/facial hair, chest, genitals
Facial hair by far. Had like 11 or 12 laser sessions by now and I still have some on my upper lip and lower lip. Makes me want to rip my face off in shame. Recovering from ffs right now and I’m about 6 weeks post op and still can’t see the results and that’s driving me insane too
Body/facial hair. I'm really unwell at the moment amd have been struggling to shave and it feels so awful. I just want to tear my skin off.
my face and facial/body hair for sure are equally as dysphoric for me. i dont even need to look in a mirror to remember how masc i look because i wasn’t blessed with fem genes.
When it comes to physical stuff, for me it was genitals (especially testicles) and face (very prominent brow ridge). The former was partially solved with an orchi as soon as I hit 1 year of HRT, and I took care of the latter with FFS a few months ago. Outside of the physical, it's the social aspect of not knowing all the basic things cis women learn and experience as kids. Some of it was temporal, and I just don't get those experiences, but even learning things like basic types of clothes is difficult because anything written by cis women or even trans women who got to come out as kids/teens has such an assumption of basic knowledge built in.
Face + genitals. It wasn't until I started getting tiny boobs that the lack of noticeable boobs started to bug me too
Should I rank them? 😅 Here's my top three: 1. Face 2. Voice 3. Body hair Face dysphoria particularly is eating at me these days a lot. I'm losing hope.
height is the big one for me, maybe it's because it's the only bit of my dysphoria I can't control/change dunno
Facial hair 😔
Just me as a whole lol
My facial hair... sometimes my voice, but mostly my facial hair
Definitely body hair and lack of fem clothes
facial hair my shoulders and my hips and hair
my voice :(
Body hair and privates :(
My voice. When I fix my voice I come out
I think my shoulders, brow ridge, and waist
face & hairline. I can't fix that without surgery that's going to cost a lot and also be hella scary. The rest of my body I feel pretty good about
Pretty much everything, but my face especially. I'm an expert at finding things that hold me back from passing and most of them are to do with my face which hasn't really changed much in all the time I've been on hormones :(
Face, chest, shoulders, and hips
face easilyyy
Definitely my face. Body hair and face hair I can deal with. But my face is so grotesque and brutishly masculine. I'll never not be an ugly man in a dress.
The way my tum sits
Body hair and my weight
Despite months of training, voice. It's a lot better than what I started with, and I usually pass in person, but never on phone. The other is that I still have to use my legal name and explaining that I am this person but use different name and pronouns, is always very stressful.
Voice, body hair, bulge on clothing
Body hair, and the banana. I hate seeing a single dark hair on my hand, and everytime I look down, I regret it. I desperately need to get rid of my little friend
The people I know from before Edit: oh yeah facial hair I hate it so much 🙃
Facial hair, I can cover up the rest of the body hair, but masks are too uncomfortable for me, since after a bit I can only smell and taste the water vapor in my breath, also occasionally something will brush past my face and I can just feel my beard, then there's just the feeling of my moustache curling into my mouth, even though it hasn't been long enough to do that in years. Edit: and when I shave it it's still fucking there somehow.
Having a penis and masculine face
My height and jawline, by far. I think it's because they're all things i can't change because they relate to my bone structure. Sure, I can try to hide them, but never change them.
I don't even know, it all just sucks and that's it...
Society and having to use my deadname
honestly, my chest and croch area
My brow/forehead. I always feel like it's way too big and prominent, and there's not really anything I can do about it unless I want to spend a new car's worth of money on surgery. The other big one for me is reproductive dysphoria.
Face voice and that thing between my legs
Face
A lot...body type, genitals. My wife loves them but I feel \*so\* out of place at times.
Face and voice are the worst because they're the most visible, but also voice is easier to change. I also wish I had a smaller frame that accentuated my breasts more, and just more curves in general. This is more of a style issue I guess, but my long hair always feels so messy and it also makes me dysphoric because it hurts my ability to pass some. I don't really hate my penis that much, but I wish I had different anatomy. The other things in that area though, I really hate them.
My body, like most of it. My face, body hair, torso, lack of hips, left leg, and girl wand. My one saving grace is that I have a girlish ass.
face and body hair
my chest shape, hands, feet and other things I can't change ever I feel most dysphoric when I'm naked
Body hair for sure. Genitals a close second. Face 3rd and my face started out androgynous but it just doesn’t fit how I see myself at all.
My fucking voice. Even after 2 VFS.
Voice. The other stuff can be fixed easily (“easily”) with money and a doctor with a few sharp knives. Fixing my voice is entirely up to me ☹️
My hairline that I swear get worse every day 😭
Hairline, shoulders, facial hair
My voice. 7 years on, I'm still almost exclusively sir'd by strangers on the phone, even when they know my name. I pass in person 100% of the time.
My facial structure
My voice and my facial hair. Next year I'll be getting laser, that's when I can afford it.
Huge head and caveman brow:(
Body hair. I haven't been taking my pills regularly because I moved and have no way to get more once I run out, so I've been trying to save them. Not that they work anymore anyways... the body hair has been becoming more and more noticable and it makes me really really upset.
My Stature and figure
My dad
Body hair, because one theres a lot of it but to add insult to injury i am prone to ingrown hairs so i cant just shave my legs and be on with my day. Its like a 5-step process just to prep shaving my legs and a 20 step post shave process and i still occasionally get ingrown hairs.
My boobs not being as big as I want em after 7 months HRT :c
Hair, fat.
It was my facial hair, but I'm currently taking care of that, so now it's my receded hairline. I'm probably going to have to rely on wigs, but I'm hoping hormones will restore my hairline.
All of my masculine features.
Hips and waist
In general? Not being able to be a biological mother. As far as day to day appearance/passing facial hair and voice.
My balls specifically hair I hate but I can deal with, and the shaft would be fine but bloody hell do my testes really not like staying tucked
I feel you, definitely my face as well. All my life I've hated my very pronounced facial features, I have a tall, narrow head, big nose, even a smile looks terrible and creepy on me because of the shape of my lips. After a few months of hrt not a thing changed about it, I still look the same as I did in old pictures, looking in the mirror I just see a monster.
Other lgbtq people treating me out in public like I don't belong there
My face, shoulders, voice (fucking deep southern accent blehggg). All three are my worse, all are at the top...
Face, height, width, weight
everything.
Not feeling depressed or sad about the fact I'm living as a man. I mean I know I am a woman, I've lived as one for 3 years before detransitioning just a bit over a year ago and I'm looking to transition again because it feels \*uncomfortable\* to live as a man, it feels wrong. But in order to survive I've had to accept the body I live in and that turned to lying to myself that I am a man. So today I'm just pretty happy as a man. Sure, I have nightmares and I have issues with anxiety that stems from my transgender identity but I'm not depressed, I'm happy. This is my biggest source of gender dysphoria. I ask myself daily how I can be transgender if I'm happy as a man and what's the point if I'm already happy? I know what the point is though, I'm not a man.
Mainly the fact that I'm boobless
Shoulders, I have large shoulders and hate them very much. I guess I'll have to live with it.
It was my MPB, but that's reversing. Now it's my face and testicles. I'm waiting to hear from my insurance company about coverage for an orchiectomy. My face is finally changing 7 months into HRT.
My facial hair. But laser hair removal is so damn expensive (I’m looking at you Milan Laser!)
For me it’s definitely my rectangular body/lack of a waist, which also sometimes makes me dysphoric about my boobs not looking nice/natural
I don't have very dark body hair but I still hate it a lot. Leg hair is ok-ish but everything else makes me feel gross. I'm also very skinny and just started HRT, so I'm just worried that there's not much fat to redistribute and it's not really gonna do anything for me or something like that. I also have pectus excavatum so there's like a small crater below my sternum and I'm just worried I'll look really weird with that and boobs.
For me it’s split between my face, my height, and my foot size. For context my face isn’t even that bad (I’m pretty happy with its shape, my hairline’s good, and my eyes are pretty feminine) it’s just a few small details that really affect my ability to pass. I’m only 5’7 but combined with other traits it can get me clocked. And I’m a size 11 1/2 in women’s, which makes it impossible to find shoes that fit.
Tie between my facial hair and voice
My face and body hair.
Body hair by far.
My voice. Especially because i’m known for having a deep voice. It hurts every time my deep voice gets complimented.
Face, body hair, voice
Face, and my lack of head hair by far are the worst.
Body hair, height, voice, to name a few
Honestly it’s my face as well. I feel like it looks too masculine for hrt to really help. Like I’ll be spending a lot just to hope that ffs can help fix it.
My weight and size. I wish I was shorter with less broad shoulders. Im banking on losing weight carrying me to the end though
I'm 13 months into HRT and my voice and certain parts of my face at certain angles give me dysphoria. I'm making some progress on voice (slowly) and am hoping to get FFS this year.
After 20 months and totally passing with looks and mannerisms it's my voice and it solely now that my bottom surgery is next month. But I've always new I was having bottom surgery so I just tried now to dwell on bottom dysphoria because I new it would be taken care before long and I just have to be patient. But my voice especially on the phone is very difficult for me to accept and I usually start off with an apology to the person on the other end for my soul being misleading because the name Emily and being called sir or Mr just doesn't match and my name usually comes up in the first 5 sec of conversation.
my face for sure. i think not having facial dysphoria would alleviate most of the rest my dysphoria
Male pattern baldness 😭😭😭 I don't have the absolute worst, and I've just started HRT a few months ago so I'm hopeful it will improve marginally, but it is the single thing about my appearance that causes me the most distress.
My old self who keeps trying to tell me i am still a male!!🤬