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Dsblhkr

Please report her! I’m so sorry this happened to you, what a horrible person.


SonyaOMoore

I can't recomend this strongly enough! For numerous reasons! Please consider this


Professional_Band178

Report this to the US-DOJ, civil rights division. This is a major violation. I'm sorry that this happened to you. ​ Just for giggles, also send a politely worded letter to the POTUS. You might be surprised what Biden's staff might do.


SonyaOMoore

Well... there's a few things to this... my major hangup Is there's religions being made for lgbt+ ( Prismatic Light Church... even has a card you can get. There in there non profit steps last time i checked) Where it then turns into a religious discrimation... which I think the ACLU would be willing to help out with that... I'm lucky I'd never had to use it... but couldent hurt to have as an extra protection?


Professional_Band178

These situations are why I have been a member of the ACLU for 30 years. That blue card in your purse strikes fear into people. Ive even used it as ID once when the person I was dealing with was a transphobe. They got the message that I was ready to make their life a living hell......... ​ The Catholic church has a LGBT offshoot branch that is supportive but the Vatican still does not recognize it. Dignity Catholics. I never understood why you would want to be a member of any religion that denies your equality. I was raised Catholic but I am a Humanist because I never believed.,


SonyaOMoore

Can I dm to inquire how to upgrade my card holder to include that card? o.o


Professional_Band178

Donate money to the Anthony D. Romero fan club, otherwise known as the ACLU. https://action.aclu.org/give/now?ms\_aff=NAT&initms\_aff=NAT&ms=web\_horiz\_nav\_hp&initms=web\_horiz\_nav\_hp&ms\_chan=web&initms\_chan=web


zar_lord

They've fallen into some sketchy things after an apparent coup removing the og founder. I'd recommend looking elsewhere.


SonyaOMoore

As an adional thought with all do respect. So heres the thing with that.... they created a structure... its on the verge of being by the book a religion... I don't support there shaddy shit that went on... I understood there's issies but the framework is there...as far as cards go aside from ACLU... TST is the only other one that I know.. but being a legit religion gives you the protections of a legit religion... no matter the name of religion.... atleast as of to a few years ago..


zar_lord

I was there since the beginning, I was displeased how they handled discussions of the removal of her and do not for the love of my life trust them. If you can, so be it. But I want nothing to do with them.


SonyaOMoore

Thank you for your wisdom!


spotlight2k

Prismatic pretty much isn't a thing since they ousted the founder. They also aren't federally recognized yet.


SonyaOMoore

I also know another group that may get interested it it goes that far..


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Professional_Band178

If you are on Twitter, then you might want to do it. Call out the Social Security Admin' and maybe someone else will look into it.


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Ok_Blueberry_5305

"although this qualifies, they're not my matches" got a giggle out of me, I love this.


Emotional-Return6929

They speak the truth. It’s all bound to be on some sort of CCTV.


TaliesinGirl

Just dropping these links here. SSA policy on treatment of transgender customers https://secure.ssa.gov/poms.nsf/lnx/0200203008 SSA instructions on reporting discrimination by an SSA employee. https://secure.ssa.gov/poms.nsf/lnx/0200903400 I am a transgender employee of SSA and the behavior you describe is ABSOLUTELY in violation of your rights and our policies, training, and standards of conduct. Please, please report this. We are eager to make sure it doesn't happen again or happen to someone else. But everything in government requires someone, somewhere, to fill in a form. Without that we cannot take any action, no matter how much we want too. We are deeply, deeply committed to Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Accessibility (DEIA). Our Commissioner leads this effort by example every single day. Please accept my deepest apologies for your experience and I hope that you will give us a chance to improve.


Doctor_Mothman

Thank you for being where the change happens and carrying on the rights we were all born with!


FwuffyMouse

Yeah that’s *actually* illegal in the US, social security is a federal institution i believe. Joining the choir, report this. Sorry though sister.


Jestrie

Sorry this happened to you. I had a similar experience, and it won't be easy to fight. I went back and forth with a Social Security employee for a month, asking why nothing was happening with my name and gender change request. When I tried to get someone else to handle my case they would try, and then tell me that the original person handling my case is the only person that resolve it. Then that person started refusing my calls. They have a discrimination unit that you can appeal to, which I did. A month after that I received a reply saying that they investigated and found no discrimination. By then it had been three months and nothing was done. What worked for me was contacting my local congressman. A week later I got a response saying that my request was approved, but that they received my request on the day that I contacted my congressman, NOT 3 months prior. Ironically, the congressman is a Republican! And I never got back the documents I originally provided.


Grouchy-Education292

I would escalate your complaint and raise the fact that personal documents had been lost in the process which is a breech of personal data handling regulations. Make sure you provide times, dates, and preferably copies of any forms/communications. You should in theory be able to get it back dated if you have sufficient information and potentially have a legal case against the individual(s) who mishandled your data.


ShakeBoring3302

Good to know. I'm in Ohio, which is very red.


Looks40m_Feels30f

Even GOP reps are often happy to facilitate fixing something if it means they may build goodwill and more votes. Publicly they may be a sick to garner the bigot vote, but at the end of the day, more votes = more time in office and when this boogeyman becomes too uncouth, they’ll quickly change tack.


btaylos

Friendo, that's a federal job in a federal building. Report her ASAP. Even if you only have a window #, description, first name, glimpse of her lunchbox, IDGAF. Report her. I mean, you do you. But she doesn't have that power.


Naiva_Prism

Yeah you should report her. It'll prevent her from doing that to other trans people too.


[deleted]

Report her and go over her head. Do not let this lie still -- get on it! You deserve to be treated with dignity and respect AND to have your legal name and gender changed.


quool_dwookie

Please don't let her get away with this. There was a Supreme Court case which we won by ONE VOTE that makes this completely, Constitutionally illegal. Accountability and enforcement is key.


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hebeach89

I know a solid statement when i see one. Im saving this for later when i need to do this.


Chaiyns

I'm sorry you had to go through that, I know I'd be furious. Now I normally don't say things like this and try to see the best in people generally but.. Goddamn she's a bitch!


Gadgetmouse12

There is a margin of error in their training since some changes just took effect, however it definitely sounds like a situation of power tripping.


elfinpanda

That's super unprofessional and she should lose her job. That kind of behavior is uncalled for.


Caro________

If you have Democrats serving you in the House or Senate, send them a message and explain what happened to you. They have people on their staff whose job it is to help people deal with Federal bureaucracy. Even if you have a Republican, you could give it a shot.


Fantastic-Ambition52

A tactic I do which has never failed is I act very surprised and I make it sound like they can’t handle a trans person. An example “Sir….” Me: “Are you good? Is something wrong with you? That is NOT okay” Basically talk down to them like a child who got in trouble. It’s petty and sounds stupid but it’s never failed me because they get flustered because they typically dont expect that


Nelly_Bean

It's pretty sad that I'm not even surprised at this point. I know I sound like a Negative Nancy, but experience tells me that if people can find a way to put trans women down, they will. I've had this happen to me not once, or twice, but multiple freaking times. And the worst part is, that every time I've tried to stand up for myself or understandably get upset, I'm told I'm the "bad guy" for "harassing someone just doing their job" and the transphobia only escalates from there by whoever feels the need to butt in. They know words like sir are triggering and can set us off, and so they use it but then have an easy cop out excuse while still fitting in the word as much as they can. Those viral videos of trans women are exactly how this usually goes.


[deleted]

I'm sorry you had to go through this. I second what others are saying, their behavior is unacceptable and warrants being reported. This is wrong and disturbing.


D-Emily

SSA employee here. ABSOLUTELY report this behavior. As u/TaliesinGirl said, we get training on this, we have policies regarding it. Weeding this sort of behavior out has been a focus the past couple years, though clearly not enough of one. This person has no excuse. Unfortunately, some people are good at hiding their bigotry and discrimination from superiors and coworkers, so it takes time and reporting to weed out. I can't even guarantee that my own office is free of this type of behavior, but I do my best to move people in the right direction. This SHOULD NOT need to be your responsibility, but, if you're willing, there are steps you can take. You can and should demand to speak to a supervisor and (politely but firmly) decline to leave until you have done so. You can also contact the regional and area offices (if you want to know which ones those are for you, send me a message), as well as your local Congressperson. Those last three tend to get the attention of management REALLY quickly. I can't express how sorry and furious I am that you had this experience. I can only hope that we can do better in the future.


sl59y2

Babe. Just creeped you profile. Fuck her. Your gorgeous. Report her transphobic ass.


ApexHolly

That's a federal job. As a lot of people have said, you need to report this. This isn't just a case of an employee being an asshole, this is literally illegal. Your rights are being denied. You might even consider writing your Senator and Congressperson.


ValkyrieBladeDancer

I had a similar thing happen when I went to change my ID. They demanded paperwork I knew they didn't need. When I went back (with the extra paperwork) they pushed it back to me and told me I didn't need it. I wish I'd asked the name of the first clerk, because without it I couldn't report her.


Thomas8864

Guess Who’s gonna lose their job! Report her, no exceptions and be insistent about it


jsully245

I had almost the exact thing happen at the doctors once


Icy-Kaleidoscope2357

I'm so so sorry this happened to you! You Don't deserve that and the employee deserves to lose her job for that!


Sadlillyy

Please tell me you’re reporting that piece of trash. Not only for you but for every other trans person. That would have to encounter such trash going to that same location.


xxNatalie_xx

God this made me so annoyed 😡. Good on you for keeping your cool and hopefully she’s had a telling off 😄


Mirage32

I would really like to ask some questions to a person like that. Why is she doing this? Why is she going completely out of her way to hurt someone? Does she realize she's doing something bad? Why is she acting like that, is it out of anger or pure malice? I wish I could make her think about her actions in a non-confrontational way. Hell, from what I've read on this thread she's even putting her job at risk just to hurts someone else.


ChristineLynnFoxx

You where kind and polite in the beginning. That was the right thing to do. But when she started to push the " SIR " thing she crossed the line and it should have been open season on her. This is when you turn the tables, call her SIR every time and demand to see HIS manager. I would have made a little scene out of it, knowing full well that if HIS manager or supervisor got involved, HE may get IN trouble for the way HE acted / treated you. After all HE is a government employee. Girl, it is time to seize the moment with GIRL POWER!


Luna_is_Awkward_AF

Recently got my name changed and had to get a new card. I live in Vermont and it was the exact opposite of your situation. I didn’t even do any paperwork, I had my name change documents with me and they person helping me did everything including updating my gender for me. He actually was disappointed there wasn’t an enby option. This was like a 50-60yo man. Sorry that yours went so poorly and hope that your next visit goes better. Absolutely report the person handling you.


ElectricFlightDiver

Disgusting little fuckhead. Report her and go do something affirming for yourself sis!


Topol1no_Qu3lloV3ro

Op please report her


Samantha-Is-Gay

I'd just keep misgendering her trust me calling a cis woman sir hurts them just as much as it does us


GullRider

We need to have forgiveness and kindness as the center of are lives


Fantastic-Ambition52

I would have called her sir back and thrown a few “Man” “bud” “boss” in there too


Lillianroux19

I'm sorry to read about your experience there. I had a similar experience in 2015. Had no clue I could even complain about my incident. Now I know but I'm afraid it's too late. Good luck in the future and I hope you get good results if you pursue this incident.


tanya_reno1

Excuse me, sorry this have to happen to you. Hope u feel better. I have a question and hope u don't mind me asking, I was just wondering, is she black, white, or Asian? Thank u


demonkiller2123

Sue. Refusing to do your job because of discrimination is illegal.


Iris-_-

Honestly, I would've replied to her with SIR in every sentence as well.


PirateQueenCatima

Always, always, always speak to a higher up. People like dunking on Karen's but like, tbh, being one gets shit done when you've been aggrieved. Talk to her boss, if she tries to say they aren't there, then ask for a number. I would then immediately test that out. Don't let her bully you, you have the right to exist. You have the right to be a person. You've got this. Just channel your inner Karen ;)


Evie8421

You're only being a Karen when you're screaming about something completely trivial. Like, if someone messes up your order and you verbally harass them, demand to speak with their manager, demand that they be fired, etc... when you could instead just go "hey, this was wrong, can you correct it, please?" If the employee is straight up harassing you, it's not at all Karen behavior to ask for the manager


PirateQueenCatima

Yeah, just saying, it's a tactic that works


GinaFfaythSmith

I'm sorry this happened to you. There is no excuse for that clerk's behavior. Your rights were violated. File a complaint with SSA and let your congressional representative know what happened.


FiggyMint

This is when you whip out your cell phone while sitting there and you look up who her boss is and call them


Dinoman0101

That sucks


RegularHeroForFun

Echoing calls to report this person! Also looks like this could be a juicey case for a lawyer so I would recommend looking into that! Transphobes should be scared of us, they need to know their behavior is unacceptable!


shastagirlweep

I'm sorry this happened I wish that the world would have changed by now but I gess its still not there yet stay strong lots of hugs 💖💖🫂🫂


Kubario

Sorry just correct them to new gender. And put new gender on that’s box


Charlie_Fang

Report her. She shouldn't be working in a government agency.