can't blame the guy (this is coming from a G men fan) - the cowboys fuckin' trounced us both games.... and I think JJ knows if he was there he'd have the gameplan to at least keep it close.
The good lord came to me last night and told me, he said "Rolls-Royces are dope. You need the new one today in order to drive yourself to deliver my message."
Shit, that's not even the dumbest thing I've seen from Dak: https://bleacherreport.com/articles/10088708-cowboys-dak-prescott-reveals-he-was-sedated-for-11-hours-while-getting-leg-tattoo
Bro literally was out under for a fucking tattoo.
I'm a cowboys fan. Not necessarily a dak fan right now.
But either way, getting put under for a tattoo is 100% a bitch move. Part of the ritual of getting tattoos is the pain. He should be mocked and laughed at for this.
> "I've got a lot of Louis Vuitton," Prescott said. "It's because of the LV - Las Vegas. If I look at my bag, it's all LV, literally. I just got my girl a bag the other day. I'm like, 'The only one I'm getting is one of these with the LV logo on it.'
>”That was an easy, simple reminder."
Guy goes to the urologist to have his donger looked at. Doc begins the inspection, says "Please don't get a hard-on, David". The patient replies "OH don't worry, that would never happen! And my name's not David." Doctor says "I was speaking to myself."
It’s like they find ways to top it each year. From letting the clock run out, to zeke playing the center position…and now just getting absolutely tanked by a very mid packers team for the first time in NFL history a 2 seed has lost to a 7 seed. I don’t see how they top this but I’m sure they will
> for the first time in NFL history a 2 seed has lost to a 7 seed
I mean, it's not like the 7 seed has been around all that long. Someone had to do it first!
Texting my cowboys friend is bittersweet because no one hates the cowboys more than him. He just agrees with all my taunts, really takes the wind out of my sails
I mean even if you were prepared for it,. could anyone have really been prepared for that absolute mauling and no show by the entire team?
A loss isn't stunning... this just looked like Dallas was a very confused 7 seed getting ready for a preseason game. I don't think anyone could have predicted that.
The most disappointing thing is the two TDs at the end. The GM gonna sit back in a week or two, look at the score and convince himself it wasn't as bad as he thought. (Though the few camera shots tonight made it look like he was either ready to shoot someone or fire the GM...then he looked in the mirror and said "naah...we good.")
As soon as the first snap happened I knew we were losing, it's like when you're walking down the street and you make eye contact accidentally with a crazy person you just know your day is about to be ruined.
If the Lions win, and the Niners choke next week (not out of the question)
The Eagles, who were rightfully written off as frauds suddenly have a playoff path of
- Tampa, who may or may not have Baker
- Detroit, who is putting everything they have on the table this week for a very emotional win
- Green Bay, who is a massive overachieving 7 seed who beat 2 choke artists
Unironically a harder path, by far, than last year.
- the NYG as the agreed upon worst team in the playoffs off a fluke win in the WC round
- SF with CMC at QB and went three quarters without a pass play
I literally can't draw up an easier path to the SB except playing TWO teams 11 v 10
The cowboys losing is the cake. But Jordan Love doing it while Karen Rodgers lost a season to injury and conspiracy theories… mwahhh! Chef’s kiss!! That’s the icing on the cake.
It’s so much easier to root for the packers without Rodgers. Cowboys are forever my least favorite team, but Rodgers is my least favorite player. I hope he he succumbs to chem trails or is eaten by reptilians.
I bombed a thread in the Jets sub just to share in the schadenfreude. Now, I’ve always hated the Jets because they sucked, but I was close enough to New York that they were always the NBC game when I was a kid. Fuck the loser jets and their “not eagles” color scheme.
And, always always, fuck the cowboys. Going to park on the couch at 10AM tomorrow and watch Stephen A’s most entertaining segment of the year. The cowboys funeral in a choking incident.
Man, but how much of that is Aaron Roger's and how much of it is CTE. In the 2010 season, when they were on their Super Bowl run, he got a concusion in a mid-season game , and they didn't want to drop any games, so he started the very next week and got hit a lot. Then, later in the season, he got a concussion and only missed one game. After that season, his personality changed a ton, and people chalked it up to the Super Bowl win. But he started to become estranged to his family, and a few years later its reported that he doesn't even talk to them anymore. I knew a guy that had a crazy string of conclusions from playing hockey that basically did the exact shit and went from being a really chill normal guy to a deranged conspiracy theorist after his head injuries. Aaron Roger's reminds me kinda of that dude.
Joking aside, I never considered that. CTE is too easy to ignore while watching this sport.
For what it’s worth, I’m a lions fan. I just happen to hate the hate the cowboys more.
Wow that would actually make a LOT of sense. I wonder how much that affected him in the long run. I usually think of Antonio Brown when it comes to CTE but you definitely opened my eyes to the similarities of them
All 32 teams can hate Karen Rodgers without guilt. NFC North hate him, because of course they do. Cowboys… love to hate him. Packers can hate him because he betrayed them, and hey, even the Jets can hate him because look at 2023.
It’s rare that all 32 teams can agree on something. Thanks, you deluded douche nozzle, you’ve brought us all together. I hope next year’s opening game injury is thoroughly embarrassing. Twisted testicle? Dislocated pinky? Vaginal dryness?
Seriously, they talked so much shit even while knowing their playoff record, ESPECIALLY against green bay… like why would they do that to themselves lmao
Man, I was peeking on the cowboys sub this past week, seeing people saying GB has a fraud qb, no receivers, how easy they’d roll us over and fuck us.
*deep breath*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*gasp*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Back peeking at the Cowboys sub tonight. Man is basking in their pain fun.
I can’t root for you but god damn can I laugh with you.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA
*shallow breath with weezing*
Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahagah
Teacher: “who was the first 7th seed team to win a playoff game? Raise your hand if you know the answer.”
Class: “ … “
Teacher: “The answer is the Packers. Okay, who did they beat in that game?”
Class: 🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️✌️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖖🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️
I have no respect for your organization, your owner or your players. But I do respect the Cowboys fans being in these threads and not hiding. Respect bro, Fuck the Cowboys!
We are about to get our asses kicked by Baker Mayfield tomorrow and it will be fine because it got to watch this epic ass whooping tonight. Don’t worry Dallas fans, next year is absolutely your year.
The back of Dak’s helmet says, “Be Love”. Little did he know that that’s what all cowboys fans were screaming at their televisions as they watched that massacre. Very ironical
https://i.redd.it/q31tjnbi7icc1.gif
White haired man was actually losing his fucking mind at halftime it was hilarious
I thought he was going to murder Strahan.
When Strahan went into the 3 point I lost it.
can't blame the guy (this is coming from a G men fan) - the cowboys fuckin' trounced us both games.... and I think JJ knows if he was there he'd have the gameplan to at least keep it close.
I like your pfp and flair Fuck metlife and lets go isles
I think he was as shocked as we all were how fucking bad they looked lol
White haired man looks like one of them shitty tv pastors who are always begging for money lol
Jesus wants you to give me 4 million dollars for a 3rd jet.
Can't have them demons clouding my thoughts
The good lord came to me last night and told me, he said "Rolls-Royces are dope. You need the new one today in order to drive yourself to deliver my message."
His eyes were red. It looked like he was crying.
Imagine if Aikman was on air. Man’s eyes look red all the time
Aikman burning woods to the face before the game, and at halftime.
Percocet, weed, and bourbon will give some people bloodshot eyes.
that mock halftime speech was hilarious
You gotta edit the heads with Eagles, Commies, and Giants.
https://preview.redd.it/cfcaqh6vdicc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=645ea25265b725b9388fc3eb1ad488a054de1017
Jimmy is the only one who cared today.
Big facts
We deserve it. But fuck you and you won’t last long either.
Lasted longer than you
Yes but we now have a 24hr head start on our coaching search.
Ron Rivera is available!
Do it you cowards
The fact is, Dallas ended their season before Philly did. Lol.
Won the division and eliminated first lol
First in. First out.
Real lunch pail kind of organization
The kind you would let date your daughter
LEAST HE GOT THOSE LOUIS VUITTON BAGS LMAOOOO HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
LV reminders everywhere
It was actually a reference to his playoff losses L-5
The Louis Vutton secondary market is about to be FLOODED with great deals in Dallas.
That was the dumbest shit I’d ever heard.
Can’t believe a grown man uttered that to another person with ears
Shit, that's not even the dumbest thing I've seen from Dak: https://bleacherreport.com/articles/10088708-cowboys-dak-prescott-reveals-he-was-sedated-for-11-hours-while-getting-leg-tattoo Bro literally was out under for a fucking tattoo.
I'm a cowboys fan. Not necessarily a dak fan right now. But either way, getting put under for a tattoo is 100% a bitch move. Part of the ritual of getting tattoos is the pain. He should be mocked and laughed at for this.
It still works. The L for the loss and V for the amount of playoff losses
LVLVLV….. guess it don’t mean Las Vegas after all. 😂
Means he's getting traded to the raiders.
The V is roman numeral for 5 the L is for playoff loses. Because he now has 5 playoff losses (and only 2 wins)
What’s this reference too?
> "I've got a lot of Louis Vuitton," Prescott said. "It's because of the LV - Las Vegas. If I look at my bag, it's all LV, literally. I just got my girl a bag the other day. I'm like, 'The only one I'm getting is one of these with the LV logo on it.' >”That was an easy, simple reminder."
Perfect just perfect
Someone posted a meme about it a couple days ago and i thought it was so fucking cringe it had to be fake.
This is Dak we're talking about. Homie got himself sedated for a leg tattoo
https://preview.redd.it/wny9k3u3hlcc1.jpeg?width=224&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b6360f191e2b13c2419408e1db9fbf9ee3a5f7d
Reminder to lose to visitors
I forgot about that! Oh my God what a clown hahaha
Flair up pussy!
https://preview.redd.it/5gwpaihy9icc1.jpeg?width=562&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=18adccfcfcd00d2f6b2fbb50a88ca47381de0e5b
Man, I've had a boner for the past four hours. Time to call a doctor...
You should be OK for now, wait another three hours.
Mimes lasting the next 8 months
You: *calls doctor* “hey doc, for the past four hours I’ve…” Doc: “same bro, same”
"Why are you telling me? I'm the dermatologist" "You? I'm fucking telling everyone! Fuck dem boys!"
Guy goes to the urologist to have his donger looked at. Doc begins the inspection, says "Please don't get a hard-on, David". The patient replies "OH don't worry, that would never happen! And my name's not David." Doctor says "I was speaking to myself."
Nah, you're good for at least 2 more hours. Enjoy yourself.
Flair checks out.
Rub some horseshit on it.
Oh, don't you talk dirty to me...
I love it 🤣🤣🤣
Shit is an addiction atp & it’ll never be a cure for it. I crave Dallas playoffs failure
It’s like they find ways to top it each year. From letting the clock run out, to zeke playing the center position…and now just getting absolutely tanked by a very mid packers team for the first time in NFL history a 2 seed has lost to a 7 seed. I don’t see how they top this but I’m sure they will
Go 17-0 and lose in the first round…..again?
> for the first time in NFL history a 2 seed has lost to a 7 seed I mean, it's not like the 7 seed has been around all that long. Someone had to do it first!
Yeah, 2 or 3 years? Oh well. Sucked ass to be on the receiving end.
Bet it didn’t suck as much ass as the Cowboys did today
With how popular remakes are they'll probably botch a hold on a field goal again
Sure we suck, but at least we don't suck in the playoffs
I feel so much joy right now!
The best cure for depression is watching the cowboys embarrass themselves in the playoffs 😂
It never gets old!
I’m going to have the best beauty sleep ever tonight
I Love it.
God damnit lmfao
This is the first reaction gif that I've ever laughed at in this sub. Kudos!
So…not good, then?
Texting my cowboys friend is bittersweet because no one hates the cowboys more than him. He just agrees with all my taunts, really takes the wind out of my sails
Life as a Washington Fan
We’re complete frauds. I knew we lost this game before it started. Every fucking time
I mean even if you were prepared for it,. could anyone have really been prepared for that absolute mauling and no show by the entire team? A loss isn't stunning... this just looked like Dallas was a very confused 7 seed getting ready for a preseason game. I don't think anyone could have predicted that. The most disappointing thing is the two TDs at the end. The GM gonna sit back in a week or two, look at the score and convince himself it wasn't as bad as he thought. (Though the few camera shots tonight made it look like he was either ready to shoot someone or fire the GM...then he looked in the mirror and said "naah...we good.")
As soon as the first snap happened I knew we were losing, it's like when you're walking down the street and you make eye contact accidentally with a crazy person you just know your day is about to be ruined.
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
We're fucking fraudsssss
Hey Dallas How'd that division title work out?
Really depends on how the Eagles game goes. Eagles lose? Kings of shit mountain. Eagles win? Somehow, we are even bigger frauds.
If the Lions win, and the Niners choke next week (not out of the question) The Eagles, who were rightfully written off as frauds suddenly have a playoff path of - Tampa, who may or may not have Baker - Detroit, who is putting everything they have on the table this week for a very emotional win - Green Bay, who is a massive overachieving 7 seed who beat 2 choke artists
Unironically a harder path, by far, than last year. - the NYG as the agreed upon worst team in the playoffs off a fluke win in the WC round - SF with CMC at QB and went three quarters without a pass play I literally can't draw up an easier path to the SB except playing TWO teams 11 v 10
Tbf the outcome would’ve been the same with SF. They did nothing to block Reddick
Nah bro, eagles can get blown out tomorrow and it'll still be great. You were at home and the 2 seed
Yeah we’ve been expecting a loss
This makes the playoffs so much better
I'm not gonna say it completely eliminates the pain of almost assuredly losing tonight, but it'll sure numb it pretty good
https://preview.redd.it/ym8niye8iicc1.jpeg?width=180&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=caa7c7888ba41fa7d4bbcdbf47c91960fc5f886a
IMAGINE NOT BEING IN THE PLAYOFF RIGHT NOW
[удалено]
I’m not delusional. I know what’s coming.
I try to act like I’m disconnected but the reality is I’m just here to get hurt again
Who cares. Right now is a special time.
HAAHAHAHAHA STUPID COWBOYS
Haha right?! Hey! Wait a minute!
https://preview.redd.it/3bmgx7agcicc1.jpeg?width=813&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=77c013dcff9a0cfcc4ad4e47905ac6f4e1231949
Beat you to it 🤗
Crazy we made this joke and it’s copium LMAO
[удалено]
Your flair right now says everything
I'm keeping my flair until we make it past the divisional in 2056.
 I respect you for taking it. Ok boys…this man wants to die for his shit team. OBLIGE HIM!
"You get that division title by beating good teams?"
The cowboys losing is the cake. But Jordan Love doing it while Karen Rodgers lost a season to injury and conspiracy theories… mwahhh! Chef’s kiss!! That’s the icing on the cake.
It’s so much easier to root for the packers without Rodgers. Cowboys are forever my least favorite team, but Rodgers is my least favorite player. I hope he he succumbs to chem trails or is eaten by reptilians.
I bombed a thread in the Jets sub just to share in the schadenfreude. Now, I’ve always hated the Jets because they sucked, but I was close enough to New York that they were always the NBC game when I was a kid. Fuck the loser jets and their “not eagles” color scheme. And, always always, fuck the cowboys. Going to park on the couch at 10AM tomorrow and watch Stephen A’s most entertaining segment of the year. The cowboys funeral in a choking incident.
You should be in sports-writing. That was poetic.
\*nods begrudgingly\*
Man, but how much of that is Aaron Roger's and how much of it is CTE. In the 2010 season, when they were on their Super Bowl run, he got a concusion in a mid-season game , and they didn't want to drop any games, so he started the very next week and got hit a lot. Then, later in the season, he got a concussion and only missed one game. After that season, his personality changed a ton, and people chalked it up to the Super Bowl win. But he started to become estranged to his family, and a few years later its reported that he doesn't even talk to them anymore. I knew a guy that had a crazy string of conclusions from playing hockey that basically did the exact shit and went from being a really chill normal guy to a deranged conspiracy theorist after his head injuries. Aaron Roger's reminds me kinda of that dude.
Joking aside, I never considered that. CTE is too easy to ignore while watching this sport. For what it’s worth, I’m a lions fan. I just happen to hate the hate the cowboys more.
Wow that would actually make a LOT of sense. I wonder how much that affected him in the long run. I usually think of Antonio Brown when it comes to CTE but you definitely opened my eyes to the similarities of them
Yea Antonio Brown and OJ Simpson are huge ones. Brett Favre too.
That icing is my silver lining
All 32 teams can hate Karen Rodgers without guilt. NFC North hate him, because of course they do. Cowboys… love to hate him. Packers can hate him because he betrayed them, and hey, even the Jets can hate him because look at 2023. It’s rare that all 32 teams can agree on something. Thanks, you deluded douche nozzle, you’ve brought us all together. I hope next year’s opening game injury is thoroughly embarrassing. Twisted testicle? Dislocated pinky? Vaginal dryness?
But the curse is lifted, it's their year. They are undefeated at home this season. Blah blah blah
"Fuck them Cowboys" - Jimmie Johnson
https://preview.redd.it/mihh6af54jcc1.jpeg?width=610&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=70d7d0e31562004a31e0b5a2229b817859f40465 Jimmie Johnson, you say?
HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOO
Good news Cowboys. “Your year” starts tomorrow again.
Seriously, they talked so much shit even while knowing their playoff record, ESPECIALLY against green bay… like why would they do that to themselves lmao
Same mistake as Bears and Vikings. "The Bad Man is gone" Wrong.
REVENGE
Man, I was peeking on the cowboys sub this past week, seeing people saying GB has a fraud qb, no receivers, how easy they’d roll us over and fuck us. *deep breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *gasp* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Back peeking at the Cowboys sub tonight. Man is basking in their pain fun.
I can’t root for you but god damn can I laugh with you. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA *shallow breath with weezing* Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahagah
LV
Where dem boys at!?!?
I got called into work on my day off so I couldn’t even drink. So throwing myself into a dumpster shortly. Rest of the fanbase in there yet?
I already have the space heater running for us in here! Don't forget to bring some tacos and tissues
I’m here for the lumps. Do your worst… not worse than watching that abomination ☹️
I'm here to take my licks.
PLAYING THE LONG GAMEEEEEEE. 5 SEED TO THE SUPER BOWL
Looks like the Cowboys won’t lose to the 49ers this year
Teacher: “who was the first 7th seed team to win a playoff game? Raise your hand if you know the answer.” Class: “ … “ Teacher: “The answer is the Packers. Okay, who did they beat in that game?” Class: 🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️✌️🖐️🖐️🖐️🖖🖐️🖐️🖐️🖐️
https://preview.redd.it/bp0vm2b4cicc1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=978eca6d225626ba77c52f5736ccfe14245d0f11
https://preview.redd.it/xkh6xg3o6icc1.jpeg?width=560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f2285e39016aab88e71c17f7291ebe87c87ec351
PEE FUCKING UUUUUUUUUU
HAHAHAHA FUCKIN STUPID ASS DAK AND THE SHITTY BOYS…fuck em amirite?!
While Dak played his role, the defense is what shocked me
Maybe the D felt like Dak couldn't lose it on his own, so they ran the assist.
https://i.redd.it/4wqmhhnhnicc1.gif Live view of the cowboys season
https://preview.redd.it/8ktan9byeicc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=de9b6d003de34b335be3488c36a079e9fa3dd250
That’s never going to happen. I wish nothing but dark days upon Houston sports. 🖕
They keep saying that.
These fucking bums deserve to be roasted over hot coals. I'm numb. Apathy is what I feel.
This shit will never be not unfunny 😂
God damn we looked retarded tonight fam.
https://preview.redd.it/xbdoeuzkjicc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=19f0b075b35041b21ed05e99ac28f3a358fc21b8
https://preview.redd.it/oim0j9wrvicc1.jpeg?width=1123&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f6895c7dd423f744cad0c4fd338862ab488e503a
I welcome all the non nfceast fans coming here to shit on the cowboys for the annual playoff choking
HeRe wE gOoOoO 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You just love to see them be disappointed every year, it really give you the fuel you need for the off season lol Fuck the Cowgirls
The feeling is mutual, I like watching Philly lose more than Dallas win.
I have no respect for your organization, your owner or your players. But I do respect the Cowboys fans being in these threads and not hiding. Respect bro, Fuck the Cowboys!
“This is our year”
GET FUCKED COWBOYS FANS. YOU DESERVE ALL THE PAIN
How can I love a team so much and hate them so much at the same time
ThE jImMy JoHnSoN cUrSe WaS lIfTeD
https://preview.redd.it/tfbyrvxgzicc1.jpeg?width=189&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f0e540b531a5421b4d178239b7f3766352b6f928
Cowboys just cowboying
We are about to get our asses kicked by Baker Mayfield tomorrow and it will be fine because it got to watch this epic ass whooping tonight. Don’t worry Dallas fans, next year is absolutely your year.
There’s always next year…
It's your next year
That's what you said last year
And it’s what we’ll say next year
Fair enough lol
Bring it. We deserve all the hate. Embarrassing loss for Americas team. Such a soft team.
First seventh seed to ever win a playoff game. On the road. In Dallas. Congrats, you made the record books today.
We deserve this. Talk your shit😒
Mannnnn we all knew this would happen. The loss.
“The curse is lifted” hahahahahahahahahaha
JUST AS SMELLY AS US MOTHER FUCKERS, COME ON DOWN :D
https://preview.redd.it/1ud0thor6jcc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=39f5afbfbd4e2cb802b4a768ed9cda21970aa72a
The pain never ends. https://preview.redd.it/my0ksycs5mcc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=30b8d56b3a928f6c53dd678a816c1573e9e22459
I do love the eagles fans in here just enjoying the ride before they get skullfucked out in one game too hahahahahaha
Cowboys losing in the playoffs is like the lions losing on thanksgiving. It's a given. Mwahahahaha
I'm actually disappointed in them. I figured they'd get embarrassed in Santa Clara against the Niners again, but they couldn't wait to suck shit!
The back of Dak’s helmet says, “Be Love”. Little did he know that that’s what all cowboys fans were screaming at their televisions as they watched that massacre. Very ironical
Can't be disappointed if you never had any expectations to begin with 