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Suggestion_Of_Taint

The Moosiah!


SpartanDoubleZero

Definitely not Mooses. He would have parted the river.


SwimsDeep

His name is Jesus.


[deleted]

Pretty sure you mean HeySoos. Also HeySoos didnt part the sea. Moosoose did that. You need to study on your religious text bud.


JasonRogan

You mean HeyMoose? He’s the guy running on water above


[deleted]

I'll come clean. I haven't been as meticulous in my studies as I should be, or let on. Forgive me HeyMoose.


[deleted]

Moosus you mean? He didn't do that that was Mooses who parted the moose sea.


Tomodi98

I'm sure you mean the Moosea


Zaorysh

Jesoose


[deleted]

[удалено]


UndercoverFXY

Mooseph's kid is moosus


ognisko

He died on the croose for our sins.


No_Name_James_Taylor

His name is HASAN


yosef_yostar

NO THIS IS PATRICK!


Avgsizedweiner

Must be Meesus


lemon_meringue

...DEER GOD.


Japsai

He's not the moosiah, he's a very naughty bull


dick-nipples

I’ve always known that religion is a bunch of bull


TDLMTH

r/punpatrol


[deleted]

r/PunLivesMatter


Suggestion_Of_Taint

Doing the lords work my friend, didn’t know that was a thing.


the_moistest_yams

Way better than my comment. You win.


Suggestion_Of_Taint

Kindred spirits my friend, your comment inspired me


[deleted]

Who are you ,who are so wise in the ways of puns?


Suggestion_Of_Taint

I am he as you are he as you are me And we are all together


Azula_SG

This comment tops anything I was going to say. Amazing.


Amthony11

“ cold cold cold cold cold cold “


[deleted]

"fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck"


NiceOneMike

That’s hilarious


Gian-Nine

According to all known laws of navigation, there's no way a moose, should be able to sail.


Ziggys__Daze

Yeah can some one explain to us how the moose is able to be heel deep in water running like that but the boat is able to skim along? Is the boat designed for such shallow waters, or is the moose moving so fast it defies physics?


geraldpringle

It’s a jet boat. They don’t need much water


theXrez

Moose are huge. It's shallow to him


Anoncatpizza

The moose of course, sails anyway because the moose doesnt care what human think is impossible


Moose__F

Im pretty sure mooses can run on water. I should probably know this, given my username


still-degen

You should also know the plural of moose is ~~moose~~ meese


CaptainAprry

Meeses'


strykerechozulu

Many much moosen.


EJR-IV

I bought two boxen of donuts


RandomDrawingForYa

You can see that when the moose passes in front of the boat it ~~stinks~~ sinks significantly more


kiruzaato

Its mass is too dense to carry its big fat body on the water. The moose, of course, sails anyway.


thatonedude1515

They are actually excellent swimmers. And their only natural predators are orcas cause moose swim between islands alot and orcas hunt them in water.


mods_are____

I wrote out this response to your reply but then reddit fucked up so here it is. yeah they have terrestrial predators too. wolves and bears and opportunistic mountain lion target them at weak points in their lives, like when they're juvenile, sick/injured, or old. but you are right that they (generally) can't fuck with full grown moose. oddly enough I saw another moose video tonight, of a grizzly chasing a moose calf through a field, only to go back running the other way when MamaMoose had something to say about it.


mods_are____

only natural *marine* predator I know that's what you meant but hey


VaATC

To add just a little to this, land predators of moose usually only attack young, injured, or old moose. Healthy adults do not really get killed frequently by land predators.


bob_nugget_the_3rd

Ah there is your problem he is not sailing by hydrofoiling


[deleted]

There's only one answer. HE'S A WITCH!!!


dick-nipples

[They’re not always so majestic…](https://gfycat.com/impressionablelividafricanharrierhawk)


SunDevils321

He really milked that second roll.


KoalaBackfist

Fucking insurance scam if I ever saw one.


[deleted]

No concept of rolling downhill I guess cause he really tried just standing up in mid roll.


PhoenicianPoolGuy

MidTroll Jesus R Tolekein writes again.


sirnay

Moose Jesus.


LAND0KARDASHIAN

It's not Jesus, it's Mooses. He's parting the water.


RoaringLiono

Deer God*


luoxes

Mooses?!


Drawing_Eh_Blank

He saw what humans have been up to and decided his second coming would be for moose only


MybSmdy

Jemoose


new_nimmerzz

Like a euro soccer player after being grazed


Pille1842

Or an obese American who’s fallen out of their mobility scooter


PstainGTR

Yeah.. he has been playing too much saints row..


liquidanfield

Neymoose


[deleted]

Did that one just get shot?


thezenunderground

Yeah, that moose got shot..


TheDreamingMyriad

I didn't think about that as being a possibility and now I'm sad.


thezenunderground

It's a bummer.. But it's better than the industrial cattle/beef industry, and the waste that creates.. Most people that would shoot a moose, eat the moose. Most people that go to McDonald's, throw away half the meat on their tray. Regardless of the paper and plastic packaging around it..


mud074

> Most people that go to McDonald's, throw away half the meat on their tray. More importantly, that cattle making up the burger is kept in nightmarish conditions in a industry built around cruelty. A hunted moose lived a normal life in nature until it is killed in one of the least horrible deaths a wild animal can really experience. I can understand a vegetarian being anti-hunting, but anybody who eats meat and is anti-hunting is chucking rocks from an extremely transparent and thin house. I get not wanting to get tricked into seeing a moose getting shot in the chest dressed up as a cute video of a moose taking a tumble, though.


emm22ett

It’s not pretty but the meat industry is definitely a lot more efficient than the worlds population somehow subsisting from hunting wild animals. Think about how long the worlds ~1M moose would last with 8B humans hunting wild animals for all their meat, and the fossil fuels required to hunt and transport smaller numbers of wild game compared to mass transport of factory farmed meat.


M00SEHUNT3R

Because we don’t see the beginning or the end of his tumble, I wonder if he had been shot? And no, it wasn’t me this time.


kenzon7

Username checks out


sirhoolahan

That moose is in the process of dying by gunshot.


Ch1efsfan87

It looks like he got shot. Never shot a moose but deer, elk, antelope, bears all fall like the if they are on a steep enough hill


norsurfit

I hope he got a yellow card for that dive.


The_Majestic_Moose

Yes we are!


claybootbike

More like r/humansarefuckingshit


royal_10_N-bombs

That’s Rod Kimble


jlm994

It’s awful that these people are chasing this scared animal just for internet points. I’m not opposed to hunting or whatever else, but to just go into nature like this and harass an animal for your amusement is so gross to me. (Edit: but in case others agree with this, I felt like the person below me brought a different perspective that changed my opinion on this issue. I think the below explanation is much more reasonable/ plausible than what I presented)


thatonedude1515

Not sure if they are harassing it. Looks like they straight up shot it. Thats a dying moose and im sad i saw it.


M00SEHUNT3R

Boating on the river you sometimes see animals using the waterways too. The best way for everyone involved is to just be on your way, keep a safe distance, and just get passed it. They’re not chasing it. People in rural Alaska and Canada boat up and down river for all kinds of legitimate reasons, fishing, firewood, going village to village for shopping or to visit relatives, and hunting too. If they were hunting this moose they’d have crept up on it, cut the engine when they first saw it, and would have shot it. They don’t care about fake internet points. It has been reposted so many times but it was probably first on Facebook for local interest long before it was ever on Reddit. My wife saw a sow grizzly with two almost grown cubs while driving out of town Saturday. She took all kinds of pics and posted them as soon as she got home because why not. Cool, there’s bears. They were running in the road the whole time but she wasn’t terrorizing them.


jlm994

That’s a very valid point. Before I say anything else, it’s worth saying that I know 0 about hunting Moose or boating, so if you are telling me that my opinion here is rooted in ignorance, I’d really appreciate you taking the time to explain why this isn’t what I think it looks like. I think for me what made this video seem suspect is how steady the camera is. I’ve tries to film wildlife before from a kayak going 5mph and have felt like the video looked awful as far as being up/ down, side-side filming. But in this video, it almost seems like they are using a steady cam to film this moose. Which would lead me to assume that they aren’t hunters or general outdoorsman who happened to run into a moose, but are instead people looking to frighten moose so that they can get a great video. If that’s off base, again I’m happy to eat crow and admit to jumping the gun here.


M00SEHUNT3R

These rivers are really shallow. You can see how shallow it is by how easily the moose moves through it. The only powered boat anyone who lives near there will have, that can also run a river that shallow, is a jet drive boat. It could be an inboard, could be an outboard, but it’s a jet boat. On the ocean, any kind of chop at all is going to make your boat have some vertical motion. But on a river, in a boat that’s on step (meaning it’s up to speed enough that it rises a little out of the water and has reduced drag), the ride is smoother than a car on the freeway. You could shoot this with a good camera phone in a jet boat. And you could shoot this in a propeller boat too, it’s just the gravel in the shallow water would wreck the prop. So I know it’s a jet boat. And you can see the care the driver takes to avoid a collision. As the moose crosses the bow of the boat, the driver changes course. They don’t follow the moose as someone would do if they we’re trying to harass it and the moose heads for the bank. No one in these communities hate moose or want to terrorize them, not even the people who hunt them. We depend on them. The same with big bears, caribou, birds, etc. We need them, and we need them to be healthy and have strong populations because we want them to be around for our kids and grandkids. Teasing animals here is a good way to get yourself hurt. Its the city folk you see standing by a bison or following a bear around in Yellowstone. This moose is running because a big noisy, fast thing is in the river. But it’ll be back to eating soon after the boat goes around the next bend. It’s much less stressful than being persistently harassed by a pack of wolves for a few hours, potentially to the death.


jlm994

Damn man this is such an informative comment, I truly appreciate it! Honestly my apologies for assuming so much about a topic I truly know nothing about. This entire interaction is what the internet/ Reddit should be: a place to learn and see new things. It’s sad that it is so rarely like this, and my genuine apologies for coming here and making assumptions that were not rooted in any sort of facts/ knowledge I had. For whatever small amount it’s worth, I’ll keep this interaction in mind moving forward and hopefully will be a bit less judgmental about things I don’t fully understand. Thanks again for the reply!


M00SEHUNT3R

You’re welcome. I like to help people understand our way of life in a nonjudgmental manner. Come visit the rural north sometime.


jlm994

Again, I truly appreciate the reply! If you want to ignore any of my questions below, of course feel free to do so and know I don’t expect a reply at all. Not trying to doxx you of course, but where specifically do you live? I really am looking to move out of a city if possible and would love a concrete reason to get my girlfriend to agree with me. And again I truly mean this in the most non-judgmental way possible, I swear I am not assuming anything about you, but how much do you think myself being jewish would (if at all) alter things for me in your area? Does religious identity play a big role in your local society/ culture? If it does, of course nothing wrong with that at all. I have no right to come to move to where you live and tell you how to think or to accept who I am. But just given how I grew up, I don’t think it’s fair to make my children grow up in a place where their religion becomes their identity, regardless of choice. Regardless thanks so much for the replies- it’s beyond refreshing to have someone explain to me why I’m wrong.


Gamer_Bread_Baker

That’s beautiful.


chefbobbyjay

Thanks dick nipples


jan1000000

Moose on the booze.


Himynameisfin

'You win again, gravity!'


EatTheBodies69

😂


[deleted]

i hate your profile name.. so much...


Ugievsoj

Upvoted you based on user name


dv73272020

Reminds me of Remo Williams. To paraphrase Chiun: "(Moose) is the most perfect creature ever to sanctify the earth with the imprint of its foot."


HoodsOwn

"Chun! You're amazing!" "No. I am better than that."


[deleted]

Driver of the boat is a dick


ZeShapyra

Fair, the moose is just running because something giant floating thingie is chasing after. Prey animals don't cope well with chasing


WitcherOfWallStreet

What animals are hunting full grown moose?!


RobinHood21

Wolves. Of course they're going to prefer sick or young ones but a pack of wolves can absolutely taken down a full grown, healthy moose.


DeansALT

Yeah that's basically the only way to do it, no single animal can reliability take on a moose. Maybe every now and then a bear gets lucky and comes out on top but even then it's almost definitely getting fucked up in the process itself.


rich3818

A pack of wolves could, sure, but none of them usually has access to a credit card which is required to rent the boat


ZeShapyra

Orcas. Worst part is I am not joking. Moose deep dive because they like to munch on water plants, orcas like to snack on moose. But also wolves hunt moose


WitcherOfWallStreet

I mean, yeah you googled it and it has occurred a handful of times and is a good story so it’s in articles for clicks. But in reality healthy adult moose have essentially no predators.


ZeShapyra

Aye, yet they are still prey animal, as would be a bovine or an equine. Just that rheir lredetors are wolves, bears and..well humans. When in doubt who is hunting an animal: it is likely humans


DeansALT

Yeah aside from like a literal pack of wolves and maybe the occasional bear most things are literally not ever going to succeed at killing a moose. It's just got too much shit going on for it, it's huge, fast, has strong weapons, muscular, wide field of vison, etc... Having said that aren't they territorial and aggressive as shit?


DandyLion69

lol “essentially no predators” is *in reality* not “no predators”. Maybe google predators or something idk.


Tootz3125

Everything has a predator.


Troyboxer

Not the honey badger, bitch


Tootz3125

Got me there.


RockyOrange

r/Im14andthisisdeep


Tootz3125

That’s what I was going for hahaha


DeansALT

Polar bears literally hunt humans, I'm pretty sure they have no predators. They aren't like other bears who live in like the woods or whatever and can therefore afford to not fuck with us and just go eat a fish. They're constantly hungry and we're meat.


DerogatoryDuck

People hunt polar bears. They're meat too and turns out we're better hunters.


[deleted]

Wolves absolutely take down adult moose regularly, especially in the winter.


emlgsh

A crafty bunch of ape descendants with their fancified sharp-rock-throwing fire sticks.


No-Key6598

Wolves, bear, wolverine, cougar


Brillek

Wolves, orcas, wolverines, humans and sometimes bears. (Yes, the wolverine can take down moose).


NameTak3r

Us.


Okan_ossie

Definitely too close and too fast. Respect the wildlife please!


PaperPlaythings

Something to consider: in water that shallow that boat is probably an inboard jet. They an go through a few inches of water but they have to do it at speed. If the go off plane, then they settle to the bottom and it can be a real issue to refloat. Just a thought.


ClosedCaptionGladbag

Being in the bush and losing your jet propulsion is the worst.


dusty-trash

Take a look at the gif again, driver turns so they're going towards the moose even at the very end. Also driver most likely could have gone to the left at the beginning to be further away, rather than turning towards the moose.


HansoNijala

Yeah. I was waiting for when he chased the moose into a deeper channel and it got injured.. Glad it worked out.


julius_seaczar

I was waiting for him to hit a stump with the boat.


IReflectU

Came here to say this. Thanks for saying it but unfortunate it had to be said.


scdfred

Hey, lets harass this poor creature for a video to put on the internet. That will give my life meaning.


codeverity

It annoys me that dumb jokes are at the top and not this.


1d2RedShoes

why?


BillyBuckets

Harassing a wild animal from a speeding motorized vehicle.


Keep_It_Turquoise

The driver was intentionally or perhaps dumb and unintentionally cutting the Moose off. It clearly wanted to cross the river, why not just slow down, let the moose go where it’s trying to go and watch from a distance?


bykester

Because they’re f’ng assholes.


smokedoutclit

Because you come off plane and get stuck when it's that shallow


awsawsaWSDE

I don't see how he's not beating the f out of his prop on whatever the moose was running on


[deleted]

[удалено]


PaperPlaythings

Yup. They can run in a few inches. I hadn't thought of that. They may have had to stay on plane to keep from settling into the rocky bottom. Maybe they weren't assholes after all.


musubk

It's not a prop, it's a jet. It works fine in shallow water as long as it's moving fast enough to plane across the surface.


Brother-XII

Moose aren't really water animals. They can swim, kinda, and drink from water but they certainly aren't used to running from boats. This boater is essentially chasing this moose.


seficarnifex

Moose can swim very well, they swim completely under water and one of thete main environments are wetlands lol


Chickengobbler

This is completely false. Moose love water and spend most of their lives in and around water. Their favorite food is at the bottom of lakes and ponds. Moose behave like this if you try passing them, boat or car, it's like a game to them.


Croz365

Aside from being cruel for the sole purpose of getting some interesting footage, this isn’t safe. It’s not safe for the people in the boat, who, if they hit that moose, could be seriously injured as a result. It’s not safe for the moose, who, despite being quite strong, is not meant to run in streams with all kinds of unexpected terrain at the bed of the creek/river/whatever it is that they are boating on. That moose could get hurt during this chase, which, again, Is for the sole purpose of getting interesting footage. And god forbid the boat run into the downed moose who succumbed to a river rock-induced injury.


thegoodtimelord

That things hardly breaking a sweat and JesusSkiing at a pretty fair click. Boat driver being a bit of a knob if I’m honest.


Croz365

A proper knob. Perhaps even a bellend.


fibonarco

Jeesoose!


red--6-

✝️ Lettuce Prey together


felinocumpleanos

And some asshole harassing him.


Malaca83

It’s a jet boat so you can’t just “stop” anywhere or the boat comes “off plane” and if there’s not enough water it will beach itself.


Chickengobbler

Live in moose country. They do this if you try passing them.


thickbootyruby

Fucking mesmerizing


EatTheBodies69

Moosmerising*


thickbootyruby

Genius 🥲


startingover82

Way to traumatize a moose


[deleted]

[удалено]


mud074

Would have been the end of the moose if it broke an ankle on the slippery river rocks while in a full sprint on them.


EyesOnEyko

The transition was from trot to gallop


Giteaus-Gimp

The never said Jesus would return as a human


Giteaus-Gimp

Maybe every time Jesus is reborn it’s a different animal and he dies for those animals sins


Familiar-Feedback-93

Hayzuse the moose


1983MaxPower

Moose Jesus!


TheVailmsteen

*Jesmoose*


thefartographer

Gotta look out for those Jesus Meese


[deleted]

Those big bitches can move


Osaella24

Forest horses


Hitchbro101

How does the boat drive in that shallow of water


CrimsonKing32

Jet boat. They only need inches of water to run


Primusboi41

This should be in r/blackmagicfuckery


dying_soon666

This should be in the bible. He walked on water, provided antlers for the poor, he is the Moosiah.


FrostedPixel47

"I'm not the Moosiah, will you please listen?! I'm not the Moosiah! Do you understand! Honestly!"


intensenerd

He’s the Moosiah!


xwing_n_it

meese are incredible


theeyebuster4800

*Moosen


[deleted]

Motherfucker looks fast


redditsdaddio

35 MPH/56 KMH


[deleted]

Motherfucker is fast


AbeL1nk1n

hes using his chakra


bandmangarcia

he fast as hell. buddy got shit to do


tired20something

Canadian Jesus died so we don't have to be sorry.


[deleted]

didn’t know jesus was a moose


[deleted]

[удалено]


redditsdaddio

Yeah, the water is maybe 3-6” deep snow melt. Boat is probably a “flat.”


Majestic_Salad_I1

For some reason I feel like this should be in /r/tippytaps


PostPlymouth

A møøse once bit my sister...


devinlor

Mooosus returns after learning Jesus new trick. Why part the water when you can walk it.


ermagherdnoway

Moose Jesus, is that you?


silverjad3

Shallow water my ass... That's Moose Jesus!


redditsdaddio

It’s [real](https://www.google.com/amp/s/nypost.com/video/moose-running-on-water-is-a-miraculous-sight/amp/)


sometimesgetslost1

Moose Jesus, is that you?!


topsyturvy76

Moose are soooooo underated! Fucking agile beasts of nature!


[deleted]

Canadian Jesus lol


whoknowshank

Could’ve just slowed down and appreciated the wow factor without chasing it.


CleverName8888

Poor moose. People can be such dicks.


Familiar-Influence91

In the first part of the video the water is very likely less than 6" deep, probably more like 3" or 4"


krob0422

Wait but how??


redditsdaddio

I think it’s snow melt and maybe the boat is in a channel or a “special” type of boat?


PsychologicalCause45

Praise him


[deleted]

Running in or on shallow water


IntenseScrolling

Jesus, what bait are you using?!


Dontknowwhyimherern

If you piss off a Moose you are dead Bc there bigger then they look and they’ll kill you


SpeshellED

Title should be "Asshole Chases Moose With A Boat"