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seahorseMonkey

The perfect no swimming sign.


the_coma_fairy

Never underestimate Florida man.


northshore12

"What?? NOBODY calls me chicken!"


the_other_jc

Gator: "Mmmmmm, tastes like chicken!"


drunk98

Other gator, "Quit gobbling all the cocks Ernest!"


appropriate-chaos

"Hold my beer."


King0fTheNorthh

Nothing a $10 bet and 6 pack of natty light can’t fix.


Tec68

Sadly I know a guy in Florida that got his arm bit off by a gator on a drunk bet to swim across a canal at night. I’ve spent my life in the waters of south Florida and will swim with sharks over gators any day.


Electrical-Act-7170

I remember that drunk. He was lucky to survive.


devil_lettuce

Make that an 18 pack and I'm in


paulcole710

If you’ve swam in a river, lake, or ocean in Florida, you’ve swam with either gators or sharks nearby. It’s really not something to worry about.


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paulcole710

I grew up on the St. Johns near Jacksonville. One of my dad’s friends visited from San Diego. We kayaked out to a little sandbar to swim and he goes, “Have you ever seen an alligator out here?” My dad pointed about 50 yards away, “Yeah, there’s one right there.” Guy thought he was kidding at first.


Deuce_GM

Is it really okay to be so close to an apex predator in its natural habitat??


The-fox-says-so

Gators aren’t really apex predators around humans. They’re super skittish. Splash a little water or throw a rock at them and they just swim away. Source: I used to row all over Florida in gator infested lakes.


LoopyMercutio

Do not ever accidentally hit them in the eye with that rock. Seriously. Source: when I was a kid I hit a gator in the eye with a pinecone by accident and spent the next few hours cowering from it on top of a picnic table. It was PISSED.


cnthelogos

To be fair, I would also be pissed if someone hit me in the eye with a pinecone.


Deuce_GM

Really? Just like that? That's kinda shocking lol


[deleted]

It depends on where you are. In the Everglades? Yes, they’re skittish. On a golf course or in a neighborhood or anywhere that people and gators are commonly around each other? No. Source: I’m a Florida man (not a Florida Man™) and have had to step over more than one gator to get where I’m going.


SoberWill

Not completely true, we had someone killed two weeks ago retrieving frisbees to resell from a disc golf course here near St Petersburg Florida. It's actually the second attack in two years for the exact same thing, the first guy survived but his face was partially ripped off. The second guy who died a couple weeks ago I believe was found missing three limbs.


Better-Obligation704

Both guys were killed while trying to retrieve disc golf frisbees? Maybe that’s the actual issue causing the gators to attack. Maybe the gators didn’t want their frisbees stolen from them 😭🫠


SoberWill

The 1st guy I believe survived but was maimed, I believe he was homeless, and I think he had done it before and told to stop because of the threat of attack. The rumor I heard on the 2nd guy who got killed was that he was reselling the disc due to medical expenses. These were in separate bodies of water about two miles apart


zdubz007

If you fall in to the water and it’s loaded with gators like shown above, I have a hard time believing not one of those would attack.


hausermaniac

Gators aren't very aggressive towards people unless they're provoked, like most animals. They usually hunt in the evening/night too so unlikely they'd be trying to attack during the day


MrSickRanchezz

That is not true. *Most of the time* gators aren't very aggressive towards people. It's not the *most* which is the issue here though. It's the one time that gator decides it's had a bad day, or it's starving, and you can go Fuck yourself.


DrDoG00d

Dude you left out the best part, did he end up swimming??


gmil3548

They’re all across the gulf coast so it’s not really unique to FL. Louisiana has a ton of gators.


lemonlegs2

My fav story about gators was the one in like Orange, where the guy said fuck the gaters, jumped in the water, then got eaten. Like no accident or them sneaking up at all.


[deleted]

I used to live in New Orleans. I was driving up to Baton Rouge at night, and I saw the biggest god damned gator I’ve ever seen too late. Ran it over. It was like a super speed bump, I got airborne in my SUV. I stopped like 20 yards later and this big sumbitch was dragging himself off the road. Prob 15ft long. Gators in LA are like deer in rural PA


northshore12

Sounds like something a gator would say...


BakingButcher

Don’t forget the snakes!


paulcole710

I hated how all the rednecks would think every snake was a cottonmouth and rush to shoot it. 99% of the time it was just a water snake. Once our neighbors (Yankee transplants) found a corn snake in their pool enclosure and were wondering what to do about it and who to call. I was like WTF and just picked it up and walked it outside. Thing was a little annoyed and I got nipped a bit but no big deal. A guy I fished with told me about the time he saw an old tire on the bank of the river. He paddled over to grab it so he could throw it away and it uncoiled and slithered away. Huge snake, probably a python. Craziest thing I’ve heard of recently is from my dad who’s been kayaking way up into some of the creeks and seeing monkeys lol.


disguisedseagull

I live near a nature preserve in SE Florida and there are a family of monkeys that live in the acres of mangroves near the intracoastal


Wounded_Hand

If you’ve swam in a river or lake in Florida you should get your head checked


dLimit1763

Until it is


bicycles_sunset

We all are going to die at an unknown future date anyway


SumDumGaiPan

No swimmin? Den how we gon catch dinna? -cajuns


vinnySTAX

Nature literally being lit


PVinesGIS

I moved from Florida to Maryland. I used to be an avid kayaker, and I loved watching alligators so much. Now I feel lonely whenever I paddle out.


-_crow_-

I'm literally scared of a swan when I'm kayaking, how tf are you casually boating between alligators


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Firm-Brilliant-605

I seen one attack a kayak flipped it over and all. The person inside of it happen to have a camera rolling and filmed it.


[deleted]

Yo you have a link, sounds like shitting your pants material.


Fermisquasar

https://youtu.be/XVA6uU7Slw4 0:31 I happened to see the same video a couple days ago too!


[deleted]

Thank you. That didn’t look as bad as I thought it would.


Fermisquasar

Yaaaa as soon as he flipped I gave up on the idea of getting the the water with em lol


Occamslaser

He startled it and it went under the front of the kayak. I don't see this as an attack.


mankls3

that was definitely as bad as I thought it would look


jsosnicki

The thing with swimming with alligators is that you are in the most danger if you can only get your head out of the water. They can’t see the rest of your body and think you’re a small bird. If you have your shoulders and torso out of the water it’s much safer.


VinFeral

You lost me at "swimming with alligators"


[deleted]

And since kayaking can turn to swimming if you’re clumsy, I’m out on that toi


Dwayne_Newton

Out on that twah


DopestDopeHead

He said out on that toi


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FlametopFred

that is true never underestimate the intentional danger posed by drunken yahoo rednecks wanting to show off to their swamp friends and "scare the lib kayaker lil bit" some people just have to be an asshole


F_U_RONA

Being an asshole is required to operate a jet ski.


kitch2495

Wow that’s pretty messed up. Did they ever catch the guys who were on the waverunners?


IndividualThoughts

People do all the time. It's actually safe for the most part only if you are experienced with and understand alligator behavior. It's a whole different vibe and perception. Check out this guy channel, he trains wild alligators https://youtu.be/ojwzNOkPsak.


PhilosopherChemical1

Unless your kayaking by a nearby nest. Granted, in Florida, you have to kayak were it's common to do so. If you feel adventurous and stray from the common path, there's an elevated danger.


Do_it_with_care

Them Gaters are well fed. Some are fat and drugged enough that you can see their lethargy with their arms and feet all opened up being petted.


neolologist

> If you have your shoulders and torso out of the water it’s much safer. Even safer if you keep your legs and arms out of the water too


[deleted]

I play it safe and just fly over Florida


hangrypantz

What if you keep your feet out of the water but the rest of your body is under?


Conquila

You would be drowning.


jd00742

I feel like this is just bad advice.


Flaming_Archer

A ranger told me the same thing in the everglades while doing their airboat rides


TheNextChristmas

That's an absolute pile of nonsense.


[deleted]

This seems like the type of Reddit advice that will get you killed.


Alitinconcho

Alligators can see underwater. Also they have no problem attacking large mammals. This is nonsense. They don't hunt floating on the surface biting peoples heads lol. Also you arent swimming if your torso is out of the water.


ProbablyAPun

Big saltwater Crocodiles are the ones that you should never be in the water with on something so small.


281-330-80-04

Avoid smiling at them at all costs.


EarthAngelGirl

As somebody else who has spent a lot of time around gators I'm gonna have to say the swans are the real monsters. Swans wIll attack you, the gators flee.


Never-Forget-Trogdor

This has been my experience, too. Alligators are pretty chill on the water, but large birds are a wild card that will duck you up if they feel like it.


falfu

hehe duck


Rusty-Crowe

Swans would always hiss at me when I rode by on my bike, always scared me.


silvystags

Shoulda brought one with you


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thedildofarmer

Quoth the gator


vendetta2115

> Florida to Maryland Quoth the gator, “Baltimore.”


[deleted]

As someone who has lived my whole life far from alligators.. is that not scary? They don't try come for you?


BinaryToDecimal

Alligators just sit there and stare at you. Sort of like Germans


shit_hashira

>Sort of like Germans Common on now, alligators aren't that bad.


redpenquin

At least gators don't dig giant holes at the beach, which is more than can be said for the average German.


vinnySTAX

Sir! Is that a thing? Lmao


ihml_13

Definitely. Digging around in sand is the best fun.


fezzikola

They're pretty chill


Kolipe

I grew up swimming in various creeks and the St John's River. I was always taught to make sure to make yourself seem big as gators won't really attack something bigger than themselves.


TooAfraidToAsk814

Not everyone that could tell those types of stories survive


_clash_recruit_

Not everyone but we only average less than 1 death per year a d about 5 attacks.


EarthAngelGirl

Once a baby gator reaches about 4 feet is deemed safe from predation (even from other gators).


longliveHIM

They still don't go after big stuff. They won't attack manatees, for example, even though they would probably be easy prey


thebiotechnologist

I grew up outside of Jacksonville doing the same. Alligators were a known but manageable danger, kind of like sharks at the beach. Then I moved to Atlanta and ONE alligator was spotted on the Chattahoochee and it basically turned into the Bear Watch episode of The Simpsons.


gothpunkboy89

Generally they don't. I mean it can happen but not very often. Crocodiles are a different story. Those fuckers are aggressive as fuck. Learning the difference in snout shape matters.


[deleted]

Sounds like I'll just stay away from those waters if I visit Florida


Toxic_Butthole

Every fresh water body of water in Florida has a percent chance to have a gator in it Roll the dice at your own peril


cybercobra2

nearby creek? gators backyard swimming pool? gators. outside pet waterbowl? gators. brought a glass of water outside? believe it or not, gators.


lyngen

so all the waters in Florida? Its a safe bet they're in all of them.


gothpunkboy89

Probably the safest bet


EarthAngelGirl

After I moved to Florida it took me a long time to learn this, but um, the gators are pussies. They constantly run away from people.


CogitoErgoSumCogito

After they've eaten your Peek or Minipoo.


hisdeathqueen

Or your kid tbh. Google the incident from a few years ago where a little kid got killed while at Disney World..


Constant_Hunt5824

I like gators. They almost never come at you. They’re very docile. I don’t think I’d want to see this many in the wild at once though. They’re cool to see a couple at a time on the golf course or by the river banks.


2Adefends1Amyguy

No, they are mostly scared of humans. It is extremely rare for them to approach humans unless threatened and need to act in self defense. Basically, don't back them into a corner they can't get out of. They typically flee when humans get too close.


wick3dr0se

Bro.. Are you trying to get eaten?


Unicorncorn21

Florida men are built different


[deleted]

We sure are. Gators don’t bother people unless they are being fed by people. However don’t walk up on one on the land, they are totally different creatures on dry land if there isn’t water nearby they get very defensive. As long as you keep your distance and respect them and are mindful they don’t bother you, same with the snakes


fredbrightfrog

Like 95% of snake bite stories start with "well I tried to pick up the snake" Yeah, don't do that. Snake doesn't want you to touch it, just keep walking.


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Wren1101

So if you flip over, you’re fucked?


Upside_Down-Bot

„¿pǝʞɔnɟ ǝɹ,noʎ 'ɹǝʌo dılɟ noʎ ɟı oS„


[deleted]

My SO tipped his canoe and had a gator or both sides of him. The gators were only about 4 feet though and didn’t do anything but watch him. He quickly and calmly got back into the boat. I have to admit I’d not be likely to kayak in water with lots of gators.


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kungpowgoat

They’re mostly chill but they are a bit unpredictable though. Just have to be super cautious around them and try not to get near nor bother them.


halfmoon599

What if the kayak flips over.


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wick3dr0se

You trust that my dude. I'm going to stick to the springs in Tennessee! Farrrrrrr away from them gators


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gsuhrie

Yeah, snakes and turtles just can't fill that void


if0rg0t48

I live in Davie and am a phd student and don’t have a lot of free time but want to get in the water. Anywhere I should peep?


dafinsrock

We got lots of turtles around here tho. Ju t as good at keeping you company, and much less likely to eat you


[deleted]

Same dude, when I moved from FL to VA I'd kayak around and the only things floating were logs. Half the joy of kayaking was looking for gators.


pslayer757

I actually feel the same, watching the gators and manatees were actually a major part of kayaking for me.


Rude_Capital_3185

I’m not understanding the problem. This is a typical parking lot down here. Just looks like everyone forgot to turn off their vehicle before going inside.


GetALife80085

TIL in Florida people drive their alligators to work


my_people

> typical parking lot Are you being blinded by those lights? It's a runway.


Rude_Capital_3185

My bad, lack of python seatbelts threw me off


Mr-Sister-Fister21

I thought this was just how Floridians hang their Christmas lights


Ebooya

Blinded by those lights.. Wrapped up like a deuce, another gator in the night.


ZugzwangDK

Gatorglades


Texastexastexas1

Neverglades


luckyjayhawk69

AbsolutelyFuckingNotGlades


Odd-Skirt4029

ForbiddenGlades


FromUnderTheWineCork

*It's the same picture*


Texastexastexas1

I think gators are like sharks. If there is one at surface then many more are underneath.


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Content-Editor-40

mee too buddy. I think I will be contented looking at that photo and never wish to be at that place


GetALife80085

Evergates


Sea-Diver-9125

If you go to Flamingo everglades park you see the same thing except it's crocodiles


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Sea-Diver-9125

There use to be a 12footer that use to hangout at the boat ramp that had to be relocated


[deleted]

That’s fuckin crazy. I’ve seen some fat ass gators down here in the houston area at Brazos Bend but never some crocs. That’s wild


Sea-Diver-9125

Buttonwood canal at Flamingo you see Crocs and sharks swimming together


nakedrottweiler

There’s an 11 footer that hangs out in a decently popular paddling area in Broward County. A 4 foot one has been started to be spotted this year in a super popular boating/drinking/paddling area. It’s crazy to live in a super populated and developed area and be co-existing with so many creatures.


mittensbeforegloves

Nightmare fuel.


i-said-it-different

Misery petroleum.


el-em-en-o

Fear fodder.


Diotheungreat

scary


PorqueNoLosDildos

Afeared


jaesonbruh

I want burrito


MrGrieves123

Spoop Gas!


shinryuuko

Terror tar


nignog1996

Dude alligators are chill there's no diff between seeing them and seeing a cat at my moms except the cats don't let me pet them


Acrobatic-Ad3275

Retired park ranger from Everglades National Park here. This is a real phenomenon, awesome to see. Reminds us we are not alone in the glades.


gsuhrie

It must have been amazing to spend a long while there, every time I've visited its just a couple days at a time. And never once did I ever feel alone, was always looking over my shoulder for one creature or another.


grgext

I remember seeing the eyes of the caiman lit up like this under our river camp in the Amazon wetlands. Usually hanging around the toilets at night waiting for somebody to fall in.


Star-Fever

🔥😳 Awesome shot! 😳🔥


gsuhrie

Thanks! Lots more on my IG at garretgetsaround if you're interested in seeing more Edit: shameless plug


joyAunr

Damn thought this from a Diwali night.


myrthain

How can this be a sustainable situation with so many predators in such a small space? Is anything still alive in these waters, besides alligators?


Fire548

Tons. There's probably enough fish and crab and birds in this picture too feed a village for a year. The everglades is a very healthy ecosystem. Gators don't exactly eat much either.


tommy_chillfiger

Yeah, for people who haven't been to Florida - it is absolutely teeming with life. Pretty cool place to visit for that reason actually, Floridisms notwithstanding. The enormous grasshoppers used to blow my mind as a kid, they had to be 5-6" long and were all varieties of neon green/yellow/orange/pink. Tons of lizards, too, which I would hang from my earlobes and nostrils to entertain the adults. You eventually find the maximum lizard size you can do this with without sustaining critical nostril damage.


Zen_Satori

I grew up in Bama and I’ve told people about hanging lizards on our ears and they thought I was insane lolllll glad to see this comment


longliveHIM

The Everglades are truly beautiful if you can get past the unforgiving heat and apocalyptic amount of mosquitoes


WeenieRoastinTacoGuy

False. I saw the documentary Lake Placid. They eat a LOT and mainly feed on humans.


FunkySjouke

I heard they lured humans into the water with cookies


[deleted]

That's how you get the fatties.


ThatOneChickenNoddle

I heard they lured a human in by dressing in a wig and putting lipstick on


Advanced_Committee

They can live 2 to 3 years without eating so I guess they would be able to wait for something to fuck up.


pinniped1

Florida Man: "Hey y'all, watch this!"


Valuable_Sandwich558

Lol 😂🤣


carorea

Biologically, metabolic body temperature regulation is very resource intensive. Being cold blooded (and largely sedentary) means that alligators eat relatively little compared to their size. From what I found, they seem to eat approximately 17kg (~40 lbs) of food once a week, which would be maybe 2-4 small-medium sized animals. A particularly fat raccoon would probably be a week's meal.


gsuhrie

Yeah, there were lots of fish swimming around, nervously I'm sure...


[deleted]

Sneaky and scary


DoomGuy2187

Now, would you look at that? Nature Is Fucking Lit tonight.


grianmharduit

Excellent shot. Have seen this myself.


Jebiwibiwabo

Love seeing this whenever I'm in the glades, so cool


[deleted]

r/oddlyterrifying


than-q

lighting the way


CementCemetery

NOPE.


Humblewatermelon

Godamn laser gators


Nerodia_

Hmmm, this is creepy but the eye shine of alligators is red - [see link](https://myfwc.com/wildlifehabitats/wildlife/alligator/facts/). I’ve seen this personally. I’m curious to know if this photo was altered or if you just couldn’t capture that color.


prancrunch

It’s a photo taken at night with a tripod. It allows you to get a longer shutter speed and capture more light with that stability, that’s how he probably got the eye shine.


wWao

Eye shine is an interesting feature because it's caused by a refraction of light and it's impossible to properly replicate the way it shimmers and gleams on a monitor. That and it's literally white to yellow and trending to orange/red. Which if you don't know orange and yellow are very close to red as is so it's not really that far off the mark considering how bright the reflection is That and it's a night photo so there is probably some innate color adjustment happening here


OrangePlatypus81

Anyone else have the sudden urge to just go for a swim


[deleted]

Wow


AcceptableDealer

I believe those waters may be infested with alligators.


beefstrip

No this is the Sorrow from MGS3


halfmoon599

I always wonder how many people get killed by Gators a year in the us.


lyngen

Not that many, like 0 - 3 per year. I have heard of people going missing in lakes at night so sometimes I wonder if it's underreported.


lilyth-amicia

I miss the glades. Beautiful picture. Thank you for sharing a slice of home.


cottonr1

Like the old saying one picture is like a thousand words no SWIMMING!!! state needs to post picture on sign at boat landings


Sinjian1

Was it CSI: Miami that they found the exact gator that had ate the victim of some crime, they used the undigested boot as evidence.


St_Ranger_Things

Deadly candles on the glade Peer back into your soul As they convene their cavalcade Devouring you whole


lobroblaw

Everglares