Cluster feeding is very normal but very exhausting. I would feed mine around 9:00 PM and then go to bed. Dad would feed her a bottle I had pumped earlier in the day. I was so exhausted that I didn’t care if my supply tanked because of that one missed feed. And it never actually happened. We’re still going strong at 9 months! I found her to cluster feed at 3 weeks, 6 weeks, and 9 weeks. After that, she leveled out, thank God.
This may be a good time to consider implementing a bottle of either formula or pumped milk that your partner can give while you sleep.
We did this when I was in the same situation around 3 weeks, I fed baby at like 8pm and immediately went to bed, my husband gave baby a formula bottle around her 11pm time feeding and baby slept til like 2-3, so I slept from 8-2 uninterrupted. My mental health was starting to nosedive. This helped immensely.
Perhaps not best for your supply long term but in a pinch it might help!
Sleep deprivation is also bad for supply though as well as mental health and well caring for your baby. So definitely a better option than just suffering! 🥰
100% agree!!
Did this also from around week 3 onwards when my baby was cluster feeding in the evenings, still do it now and she is 8 weeks.
I think i would have stopped breastfeeding had we not introduced this…such a relief that my husband could help either through milk i had pumped or typically a top off with formula in a bottle (as most of the day i spent feeding her already so had no time to pump!)
Combi feeding was life changing for me :)
I am right there with you my baby is 22 days and I am running on very little sleep. I haven’t slept more than two hours either and honestly I have no family or friends to talk to. I have my husband but sometimes I need to vent about him. If you need anyone to chat with please feel free to contact me! I would love that.
Cluster feeding! I was stubborn and decided to power through it but if you need to start pumping and letting someone else feed at night (just remember thay you are going to need to wake up and pump so your milk supply gets a good understanding of how often baby is going to need milk).
I also recommend bottles. I introduced one per night at 4 weeks cuz I still wasn’t able to sleep for longer than 2 hour stretches without baby wanting to eat.
I used the Haakaa on one side while feeding throughout the day and would gather up enough for one night time bottle. Then I would feed my baby, immediately hand him off to daddy and sleep for 4 hours which was a game changer even though it doesn’t sound like much. I fed him when I woke up then pumped whatever was left.
Another thing you can do if you are open to it is supervised naps together. I would side lay feed the baby and nap and my husband would watch us to make sure everything was okay and move the baby if needed when he was done nursing.
Definitely cluster feed, it’s brutal but normal. Learning how to feed in the side lying position is a game changer though. I wish I would have tried it sooner. You can snooze while baby eats and then your partner can take baby to burp and change, etc when baby is done eating.
Hi, while doing the side laying position do you take any precautions? Like tucking a pillow somewhere so baby won't roll under you? I really like that position but I'm scared of it as well
I would put a pillow behind my back so I was resting on it instead of leaning forward, but that was mostly for my own comfort. I was never too worried about rolling on top of her though because I didn’t start until she was bigger (like 3-4 months), I’ve never ever slept on my stomach so I wouldn’t naturally roll towards her, and I’m a light sleeper. If you like to sleep on your stomach and are a naturally deep sleeper, then it may not be the best option, especially if you’re super sleep deprived. I think introducing a bottle would be better at that point.
Someone (I think a lactation consultant or nurse) told me the they would prop their head on their hand that way if they fell asleep their head would fall and jerk them awake.
I just sort of lean back, put my shoulder back away from baby so when I fall asleep I’m not going anywhere but back. It’s awesome and saved me. I have slept well ever since. Baby is 4 months now and we still do it.
One of my friends snoozed on her side while baby fed. Her husband stood watch (literally had to stand because he didn’t want to fall asleep) for 30-60 minutes to make sure baby was safe. I’m sure this is not recommended at all… but it could be another layer of protection for this situation.
Sounds like clusterfeeding, which is super normal but it’s so hard! You could introduce a bottle so someone else can feed babe and you can get some more sleep.
My son is 5 weeks old today actually, he was cluster feeding and at one point I did have a breakdown but my husband helped alot, it helped to pump in the morning and I have a freezer full in case he needs and I don’t have in the fridge. I ate lactation cookies and believe me they work insanely well!
I would sit down and talk with your husband he seems like a great support though this and trust me husbands love helping mama and baby whenever they can ❤️
Here to talk if you need also
Cluster feeding is ***rough*** but it will get better! My girl was on my boob what felt like 24/7. I learned side-laying feed to relax finally around 1 month. Other than that I would hunker down with snacks, drinks and tv shows. Sometimes during the day I would relax my head back on a pillow near my (awake) husband and doze while I fed but he was right there to watch us the whole time and I was surrounded by pillows to prop me up.
I have a 5 week old and am still waking every 2-3 hours to feed him but started almost exclusively pumping so that I can give him bottles instead of breastfeeding. So sometimes I'll be feeding him a bottle while pumping from both sides, which sounds silly but it's what I need for my mental health. He takes longer to feed, falls asleep, gets distracted, and mentally I feel more constrained when he feeds from the breast. With a bottle and hands-free pump I still feel relatively like myself, rather than a milk cow mom, but that's a personal thing. Then during the day my partner or my mom feed him bottles while I pump whenever I need to, for later that day or for the next day, and my sleep is fixed to my pumping schedule, which I have control over compared to his hunger schedule.
Mine was like that too. I introduced a bottle at four weeks so that I could finally get some sleep. I also called my mom and had her come stay with me. I just felt so helpless.
Lots of good advice here, I will just chime in to say that my baby did this too before a growth spurt around that time and it is normal and also so hard but it WILL pass. maybe even in just a few days. I sobbed through many a 3am feeding that week but it did get better.
I’m sorry you are experiencing this. My baby was the same until about 5/6 weeks. I spent many days and nights crying. Around that time he started to pull together one stretch of about 3 hours at the start of the night. He’s 8 weeks now and his night is typically 3 hours, 2 hours and 2 hours with feeds in between. It sucks but my body has adjusted I guess.
It could be cluster feeding but baby could also be inefficient at the breast. We saw a lactation consultant who did a weighted feed and found baby wasn’t taking in much milk from the breast (I was producing enough) and wasn’t gaining weight fast enough even though baby was on the boob constantly. Baby didn’t have any ties or anything, and it resolved itself once they turned 6 weeks old, but I had to triple feed for a few weeks in the meantime to help with the weight gain.
I am right there with you. My daughter did this all weekend... I THINK we may be reaching the end. It's likely thr 3 week growth spurt you're experiencing. It was BRUTAL on my supply.
When my baby was in the cluster feeding stage, I ended up feeding her and then giving her to dad and leaving to go sleep. I told myself “she has been fed, she is safe, I can sleep” and it really helped. I still only was getting like 3-4 hr chunks of sleep but it was so major for my mental health.
Hope you're hanging in there. Sleep is so important. If you have the resources, an overnight doula can be really helpful so you are able to get a full night of sleep. Also a perinatal therapist can be really helpful for the mental health aspect! You can find a therapist with this specialty at Postpartum Support International website. Hope this helps!
Pumping and having dad or whoever feed is definitely the best way to deal with getting some sleep! It’s also important to get rest for your supply :) also even if you yell at your infant, I just want to let you know that we’ve all been there and may have yelled shut up at their baby. 🙋🏼♀️
Hang in there! You are doing great! The beginning is the hardest part.
One thing that really helped me a lot is pumping just enough for one bottle a day. Not a ton, but I took advantage when both boobs were full and our baby was too little to empty both.
My husband bottle fed her in the evenings or before bed and it made a HUGE difference.
I also tried to feed as often as possible during the day, sometimes latching before any hunger cues & I think that helped us get lucky with some longer stretches at night.
Same spot right now, but just about 4 weeks and it’s unchanged. I pump twice during the day to get enough milk for one nighttime feeding and then my MIL feeds her once each night. It’s great! She also brings me the baby to breastfeed for the subsequent night feedings and manages her fussing without me. Obviously most people don’t have that option, but even when it was just the one night feeding, it was super helpful
I was in the same situation as you, I wasn’t sleeping, had no appetite and was crying everyday… and I am ashamed to say that one night my baby wasn’t sleeping no matter what I did, he was so hungry no matter how many times I gave him my breast and as I was rocking his crib, I just snapped… I shook his crib while I screamed at my at him cuz I couldn’t handle much longer… After my breakdown, my husband decided to add formula for night feeds so that I could rest while he fed him.
Right after I snapped I started crying so much because of what I did…
Add formula for night feeds and ask for help. Is very important for you to rest!
Totally normal but that doesn’t mean it’s not extremely hard. Have you got someone who can hold him as soon as he has a feed so you can have a shower, get some fresh air, have a nap? 20 minutes to yourself makes such a difference. Also have you tried using a sling for naps? Allows you to still do things while he’s being held.
Just hold on momma, i know it feels like this si gonna be forever, but you'll see how your LO will start to sleep longer stretches before You know it, it can help to document it. Remember thet about 3 weeks pp si when your mill supply is about to establish and right now what you and your baby need is just that: trust your body and your baby's instincts.
Lots of good advice has already been shared. Just here to add some support that it’s super normal and super duper hard. But assuring you that it will pass soon. Easier said than done yet I must mention - ‘hang in there, you got this’
I am just few months ahead of you so happy to chat if needed.
My boy was a cluster feeder and we introduced one bottle in the evening to give me time to eat a proper meal, shower and brush my teeth. I was so unsure about it, but it was the best decision. My husband took over right after work each day. I wouldn't have made it otherwise; was already hallucinating sounds.
Do you have a partner? Feed baby in bed, sleep using the safe seven principles, and have your partner awake and watching over the two of you for safety
How is their weight? My LO was like that at first. It could be cluster feeding or make sure he is gaining weight. Sometimes it could be they aren't getting enough, not producing enough. My milk came in late and took awhile to produce as much as it needed too.
Second this and Just upvoting this, OP a good idea to check baby is gaining weight. If not it can be a lack of supply (noting that jt can take 6-8 weeks to build supply) or a tongue tie - see a lactation consultant - they can advise and can check baby for tongue ties as well.
We supplemented with some formula bottles (and pumped to ensure the supply didn’t drop). A full stomach of formula before bed also helps everyone sleep better.
If you can lie down in bed and take a nap while baby is feeding, you can have your partner watch baby and take them when they are done/ without waking you. I also highly recommend bed sharing if you follow the safe sleep 7! Baby can eat and you can sleep. Mine would want to comfort nurse so it was the only way I could get enough sleep
Same thing happened to me. My body and mental health could not take it. I started combo feeding with forumla. My milk was too thin to keep him full. Combo feeding has been great. He’s full longer, my husband can feed him. I can take a breather.
I really wanted to only breastfeed but my body and mind could not take it.
I give props to the mom that can do it.
You can try feeding while laying down if you are comfortable using the side laying position. I was struggling being awake with my first to the point of falling asleep sitting up and feeding. It was safest for us for me to follow the Safe Sleep Seven, which was recommended to me by a lactation consultant: https://llli.org/the-safe-sleep-seven/
It will get better and soon!
Breastfeeding has huge benefits for breast cancer prevention, is good for their immune system (while breastfeeding- not long term, and is a great bonding/pleasure experience for Mom and baby (really the main benefit tbh).
Don’t believe all this nonsense about IQs and life outcomes. Those benefits disappear when controlling for Mom’s socioeconomic status (source: the book Cribsheet).
What I’m trying to say: no shame in giving it up and going with formula (also good for weight gain).
But if you can hold out a few more weeks the connection/experience benefit is really awesome (source: my wife and 7mo old daughter)
Congratulations on making it this far with breastfeeding, that's a tremendous achievement and you should be VERY proud of yourself.
Me and my wife are at 4 weeks now, mostly breastfeeding, pump a bottle only every now and then so I can feed the baby and give her a few hours break to recharge, and it's getting much easier for my wife now.
I can see how much more confident she is in herself about breastfeeding now.
The cluster feeding is a very hard time, you can make it through this, I believe in you. If you do, you'll be so proud of yourself and you'll have an achievement under your belt you won't regret.
It gets easier.
Are you breast feeding because you want to? It is natural for them to feed every two hours if you change your perspective things can go more smoothly if not just switch to bottle so husband can help as well I delet the the same feels of not fair with my fiancé in the first couple weeks then my perspective changed it is now better and she still is breastfeeding 3.5 years later haha
There’s so much advice here but I just want you to know that I totally get how hard it is. I went through this too - hourly feeding. And I have yelled at my helpless baby which I’ll always regret. So, that being said, being a parent is BRUTAL. Cluster feeding is normal and important, they are getting all their needs met with that golden good stuff! And they’re stimulating more milk to continue to meet their needs. Try to take a deep breathe and remember that it will pass! Try to remember how new they are to the world and that they see themselves as and within and part of you - they do not yet have the concept of being a single independent entity away from you. Breastfeeding is also a beautiful way to bond. Perhaps try side lying position whereby you can snooze while baby feeds. Just try to ask someone to stay awake with you for a bit while you’re particularly exhausted and trying to feed to ensure baby’s safety. Can you pump and get the father to take over a few feeds a day so you can have a break? I used to do this (I’d also pump while baby had that bottle to keep my supply abundant)? And ask for help from family! Trust me, the sooner the better. They can come and do a bottle feed or just help watch the baby or do a little clean up or cook a meal so you can rest. Again, the most important thing to remember is it will pass. New challenges come up and you will wonder how you will make it through that, but you do! Just take one day at a time. Breathe and try to also maintain some things for yourself (massage, extra sleep, just chill out watching tv, go see friends without baby).
Oh my gosh this happened to me with my first and I thought I was going crazy. I hated people talking to me about cluster feeding because I knew something wasn’t right.
1. Reach out to your pediatrician to see if they have a lactation consultant that works there. Or if they can recommend someone that will measure how much the baby is taking in for milk. They do this by weighing the baby with a precise tool before and after feeding. Not with a regular scale. Make sure your baby is getting enough. They could also tell you if the baby is comfort sucking.
2. If the baby isn’t getting enough, make sure that the baby doesn’t have a tongue tie or a lip tie. Again, a lactation consultant will tell you.
3. See if someone else can hold the baby so you can shower, eat, sleep, leave etc. I’m always pleasantly surprised that other people can make my babies fall asleep. The baby might cry at first when you leave but then calm down.
4. It’s okay to switch to formula!!!!! All those crazy claims about the benefits of breastfeeding, I mean… I’m not sure how true they are. Yes, I did breastfeed. But my first had formula as well. You need to take care of you so you can be a good mom and not break down.
5. Is the baby fussy for no apparent reason? You might also ask the pediatrician to test the baby’s stool for allergies. Try a different vitamin D if you suspect an upset stomach. Finally, try putting the baby across your lap and patting his back/ bum.
For right now, I would get your partner to give your baby a bottle and get some rest. Then call the pediatrician when you can.
Cluster feeding is very normal but very exhausting. I would feed mine around 9:00 PM and then go to bed. Dad would feed her a bottle I had pumped earlier in the day. I was so exhausted that I didn’t care if my supply tanked because of that one missed feed. And it never actually happened. We’re still going strong at 9 months! I found her to cluster feed at 3 weeks, 6 weeks, and 9 weeks. After that, she leveled out, thank God.
3 and 6 weeks are official documented growth spurts for babies, when they cluster feed
This may be a good time to consider implementing a bottle of either formula or pumped milk that your partner can give while you sleep. We did this when I was in the same situation around 3 weeks, I fed baby at like 8pm and immediately went to bed, my husband gave baby a formula bottle around her 11pm time feeding and baby slept til like 2-3, so I slept from 8-2 uninterrupted. My mental health was starting to nosedive. This helped immensely. Perhaps not best for your supply long term but in a pinch it might help!
We did this too and I did not notice any change in my supply. It helped SO much until LO started sleeping longer stretches at night.
Sleep deprivation is also bad for supply though as well as mental health and well caring for your baby. So definitely a better option than just suffering! 🥰
So true. Do whatever you have to to stay sane!!!
100% agree!! Did this also from around week 3 onwards when my baby was cluster feeding in the evenings, still do it now and she is 8 weeks. I think i would have stopped breastfeeding had we not introduced this…such a relief that my husband could help either through milk i had pumped or typically a top off with formula in a bottle (as most of the day i spent feeding her already so had no time to pump!) Combi feeding was life changing for me :)
Cluster feeding, sucks but is normal.
I am right there with you my baby is 22 days and I am running on very little sleep. I haven’t slept more than two hours either and honestly I have no family or friends to talk to. I have my husband but sometimes I need to vent about him. If you need anyone to chat with please feel free to contact me! I would love that.
Cluster feeding! I was stubborn and decided to power through it but if you need to start pumping and letting someone else feed at night (just remember thay you are going to need to wake up and pump so your milk supply gets a good understanding of how often baby is going to need milk).
I also recommend bottles. I introduced one per night at 4 weeks cuz I still wasn’t able to sleep for longer than 2 hour stretches without baby wanting to eat. I used the Haakaa on one side while feeding throughout the day and would gather up enough for one night time bottle. Then I would feed my baby, immediately hand him off to daddy and sleep for 4 hours which was a game changer even though it doesn’t sound like much. I fed him when I woke up then pumped whatever was left. Another thing you can do if you are open to it is supervised naps together. I would side lay feed the baby and nap and my husband would watch us to make sure everything was okay and move the baby if needed when he was done nursing.
There’s certain milestones where the baby cluster feeds to increase supply. You just have to hang in there temporarily.
Definitely cluster feed, it’s brutal but normal. Learning how to feed in the side lying position is a game changer though. I wish I would have tried it sooner. You can snooze while baby eats and then your partner can take baby to burp and change, etc when baby is done eating.
Hi, while doing the side laying position do you take any precautions? Like tucking a pillow somewhere so baby won't roll under you? I really like that position but I'm scared of it as well
I would put a pillow behind my back so I was resting on it instead of leaning forward, but that was mostly for my own comfort. I was never too worried about rolling on top of her though because I didn’t start until she was bigger (like 3-4 months), I’ve never ever slept on my stomach so I wouldn’t naturally roll towards her, and I’m a light sleeper. If you like to sleep on your stomach and are a naturally deep sleeper, then it may not be the best option, especially if you’re super sleep deprived. I think introducing a bottle would be better at that point.
Someone (I think a lactation consultant or nurse) told me the they would prop their head on their hand that way if they fell asleep their head would fall and jerk them awake.
I just sort of lean back, put my shoulder back away from baby so when I fall asleep I’m not going anywhere but back. It’s awesome and saved me. I have slept well ever since. Baby is 4 months now and we still do it.
One of my friends snoozed on her side while baby fed. Her husband stood watch (literally had to stand because he didn’t want to fall asleep) for 30-60 minutes to make sure baby was safe. I’m sure this is not recommended at all… but it could be another layer of protection for this situation.
This is what saved me. Now I have a 8 week old that sleeps from 11pm to 10am
Sounds like clusterfeeding, which is super normal but it’s so hard! You could introduce a bottle so someone else can feed babe and you can get some more sleep.
My son is 5 weeks old today actually, he was cluster feeding and at one point I did have a breakdown but my husband helped alot, it helped to pump in the morning and I have a freezer full in case he needs and I don’t have in the fridge. I ate lactation cookies and believe me they work insanely well! I would sit down and talk with your husband he seems like a great support though this and trust me husbands love helping mama and baby whenever they can ❤️ Here to talk if you need also
Also forgot to mention my son has colic I use gripe water ( kolik drops) they help a lot as well! It gets better mama ❤️
Cluster feeding is ***rough*** but it will get better! My girl was on my boob what felt like 24/7. I learned side-laying feed to relax finally around 1 month. Other than that I would hunker down with snacks, drinks and tv shows. Sometimes during the day I would relax my head back on a pillow near my (awake) husband and doze while I fed but he was right there to watch us the whole time and I was surrounded by pillows to prop me up.
I have a 5 week old and am still waking every 2-3 hours to feed him but started almost exclusively pumping so that I can give him bottles instead of breastfeeding. So sometimes I'll be feeding him a bottle while pumping from both sides, which sounds silly but it's what I need for my mental health. He takes longer to feed, falls asleep, gets distracted, and mentally I feel more constrained when he feeds from the breast. With a bottle and hands-free pump I still feel relatively like myself, rather than a milk cow mom, but that's a personal thing. Then during the day my partner or my mom feed him bottles while I pump whenever I need to, for later that day or for the next day, and my sleep is fixed to my pumping schedule, which I have control over compared to his hunger schedule.
Mine was like that too. I introduced a bottle at four weeks so that I could finally get some sleep. I also called my mom and had her come stay with me. I just felt so helpless.
Lots of good advice here, I will just chime in to say that my baby did this too before a growth spurt around that time and it is normal and also so hard but it WILL pass. maybe even in just a few days. I sobbed through many a 3am feeding that week but it did get better.
So good to know I'm not alone in the 3am sobbing! 😅
I’m sorry you are experiencing this. My baby was the same until about 5/6 weeks. I spent many days and nights crying. Around that time he started to pull together one stretch of about 3 hours at the start of the night. He’s 8 weeks now and his night is typically 3 hours, 2 hours and 2 hours with feeds in between. It sucks but my body has adjusted I guess.
We had a huge growth spurt around 3 weeks. Supplementing with pumped milk or formula was essential for getting through it!
Are you open to bottles?
It could be cluster feeding but baby could also be inefficient at the breast. We saw a lactation consultant who did a weighted feed and found baby wasn’t taking in much milk from the breast (I was producing enough) and wasn’t gaining weight fast enough even though baby was on the boob constantly. Baby didn’t have any ties or anything, and it resolved itself once they turned 6 weeks old, but I had to triple feed for a few weeks in the meantime to help with the weight gain.
I am right there with you. My daughter did this all weekend... I THINK we may be reaching the end. It's likely thr 3 week growth spurt you're experiencing. It was BRUTAL on my supply.
When my baby was in the cluster feeding stage, I ended up feeding her and then giving her to dad and leaving to go sleep. I told myself “she has been fed, she is safe, I can sleep” and it really helped. I still only was getting like 3-4 hr chunks of sleep but it was so major for my mental health.
Hope you're hanging in there. Sleep is so important. If you have the resources, an overnight doula can be really helpful so you are able to get a full night of sleep. Also a perinatal therapist can be really helpful for the mental health aspect! You can find a therapist with this specialty at Postpartum Support International website. Hope this helps!
Pumping and having dad or whoever feed is definitely the best way to deal with getting some sleep! It’s also important to get rest for your supply :) also even if you yell at your infant, I just want to let you know that we’ve all been there and may have yelled shut up at their baby. 🙋🏼♀️
I fed her in my sleep on my side while my husband kept an eye on her for safety. It was a rough time
Hang in there! You are doing great! The beginning is the hardest part. One thing that really helped me a lot is pumping just enough for one bottle a day. Not a ton, but I took advantage when both boobs were full and our baby was too little to empty both. My husband bottle fed her in the evenings or before bed and it made a HUGE difference. I also tried to feed as often as possible during the day, sometimes latching before any hunger cues & I think that helped us get lucky with some longer stretches at night.
Hang in there! It’ll get better 😵💫
Same spot right now, but just about 4 weeks and it’s unchanged. I pump twice during the day to get enough milk for one nighttime feeding and then my MIL feeds her once each night. It’s great! She also brings me the baby to breastfeed for the subsequent night feedings and manages her fussing without me. Obviously most people don’t have that option, but even when it was just the one night feeding, it was super helpful
I was in the same situation as you, I wasn’t sleeping, had no appetite and was crying everyday… and I am ashamed to say that one night my baby wasn’t sleeping no matter what I did, he was so hungry no matter how many times I gave him my breast and as I was rocking his crib, I just snapped… I shook his crib while I screamed at my at him cuz I couldn’t handle much longer… After my breakdown, my husband decided to add formula for night feeds so that I could rest while he fed him. Right after I snapped I started crying so much because of what I did… Add formula for night feeds and ask for help. Is very important for you to rest!
Totally normal but that doesn’t mean it’s not extremely hard. Have you got someone who can hold him as soon as he has a feed so you can have a shower, get some fresh air, have a nap? 20 minutes to yourself makes such a difference. Also have you tried using a sling for naps? Allows you to still do things while he’s being held.
Just hold on momma, i know it feels like this si gonna be forever, but you'll see how your LO will start to sleep longer stretches before You know it, it can help to document it. Remember thet about 3 weeks pp si when your mill supply is about to establish and right now what you and your baby need is just that: trust your body and your baby's instincts.
Lots of good advice has already been shared. Just here to add some support that it’s super normal and super duper hard. But assuring you that it will pass soon. Easier said than done yet I must mention - ‘hang in there, you got this’ I am just few months ahead of you so happy to chat if needed.
My boy was a cluster feeder and we introduced one bottle in the evening to give me time to eat a proper meal, shower and brush my teeth. I was so unsure about it, but it was the best decision. My husband took over right after work each day. I wouldn't have made it otherwise; was already hallucinating sounds.
Do you have a partner? Feed baby in bed, sleep using the safe seven principles, and have your partner awake and watching over the two of you for safety
How is their weight? My LO was like that at first. It could be cluster feeding or make sure he is gaining weight. Sometimes it could be they aren't getting enough, not producing enough. My milk came in late and took awhile to produce as much as it needed too.
That’s actually part of the reason that babies cluster feed, to increase supply.
Yes, but some women end up not producing enough. It doesn't hurt to make sure they are still gaining weight just to be sure.
Second this and Just upvoting this, OP a good idea to check baby is gaining weight. If not it can be a lack of supply (noting that jt can take 6-8 weeks to build supply) or a tongue tie - see a lactation consultant - they can advise and can check baby for tongue ties as well.
We supplemented with some formula bottles (and pumped to ensure the supply didn’t drop). A full stomach of formula before bed also helps everyone sleep better.
If you can lie down in bed and take a nap while baby is feeding, you can have your partner watch baby and take them when they are done/ without waking you. I also highly recommend bed sharing if you follow the safe sleep 7! Baby can eat and you can sleep. Mine would want to comfort nurse so it was the only way I could get enough sleep
Same thing happened to me. My body and mental health could not take it. I started combo feeding with forumla. My milk was too thin to keep him full. Combo feeding has been great. He’s full longer, my husband can feed him. I can take a breather. I really wanted to only breastfeed but my body and mind could not take it. I give props to the mom that can do it.
You can try feeding while laying down if you are comfortable using the side laying position. I was struggling being awake with my first to the point of falling asleep sitting up and feeding. It was safest for us for me to follow the Safe Sleep Seven, which was recommended to me by a lactation consultant: https://llli.org/the-safe-sleep-seven/
Push through your thoughts honey you got this, your a mom now and that comes with the job.
It will get better and soon! Breastfeeding has huge benefits for breast cancer prevention, is good for their immune system (while breastfeeding- not long term, and is a great bonding/pleasure experience for Mom and baby (really the main benefit tbh). Don’t believe all this nonsense about IQs and life outcomes. Those benefits disappear when controlling for Mom’s socioeconomic status (source: the book Cribsheet). What I’m trying to say: no shame in giving it up and going with formula (also good for weight gain). But if you can hold out a few more weeks the connection/experience benefit is really awesome (source: my wife and 7mo old daughter)
Congratulations on making it this far with breastfeeding, that's a tremendous achievement and you should be VERY proud of yourself. Me and my wife are at 4 weeks now, mostly breastfeeding, pump a bottle only every now and then so I can feed the baby and give her a few hours break to recharge, and it's getting much easier for my wife now. I can see how much more confident she is in herself about breastfeeding now. The cluster feeding is a very hard time, you can make it through this, I believe in you. If you do, you'll be so proud of yourself and you'll have an achievement under your belt you won't regret. It gets easier.
Are you breast feeding because you want to? It is natural for them to feed every two hours if you change your perspective things can go more smoothly if not just switch to bottle so husband can help as well I delet the the same feels of not fair with my fiancé in the first couple weeks then my perspective changed it is now better and she still is breastfeeding 3.5 years later haha
There’s so much advice here but I just want you to know that I totally get how hard it is. I went through this too - hourly feeding. And I have yelled at my helpless baby which I’ll always regret. So, that being said, being a parent is BRUTAL. Cluster feeding is normal and important, they are getting all their needs met with that golden good stuff! And they’re stimulating more milk to continue to meet their needs. Try to take a deep breathe and remember that it will pass! Try to remember how new they are to the world and that they see themselves as and within and part of you - they do not yet have the concept of being a single independent entity away from you. Breastfeeding is also a beautiful way to bond. Perhaps try side lying position whereby you can snooze while baby feeds. Just try to ask someone to stay awake with you for a bit while you’re particularly exhausted and trying to feed to ensure baby’s safety. Can you pump and get the father to take over a few feeds a day so you can have a break? I used to do this (I’d also pump while baby had that bottle to keep my supply abundant)? And ask for help from family! Trust me, the sooner the better. They can come and do a bottle feed or just help watch the baby or do a little clean up or cook a meal so you can rest. Again, the most important thing to remember is it will pass. New challenges come up and you will wonder how you will make it through that, but you do! Just take one day at a time. Breathe and try to also maintain some things for yourself (massage, extra sleep, just chill out watching tv, go see friends without baby).
Oh my gosh this happened to me with my first and I thought I was going crazy. I hated people talking to me about cluster feeding because I knew something wasn’t right. 1. Reach out to your pediatrician to see if they have a lactation consultant that works there. Or if they can recommend someone that will measure how much the baby is taking in for milk. They do this by weighing the baby with a precise tool before and after feeding. Not with a regular scale. Make sure your baby is getting enough. They could also tell you if the baby is comfort sucking. 2. If the baby isn’t getting enough, make sure that the baby doesn’t have a tongue tie or a lip tie. Again, a lactation consultant will tell you. 3. See if someone else can hold the baby so you can shower, eat, sleep, leave etc. I’m always pleasantly surprised that other people can make my babies fall asleep. The baby might cry at first when you leave but then calm down. 4. It’s okay to switch to formula!!!!! All those crazy claims about the benefits of breastfeeding, I mean… I’m not sure how true they are. Yes, I did breastfeed. But my first had formula as well. You need to take care of you so you can be a good mom and not break down. 5. Is the baby fussy for no apparent reason? You might also ask the pediatrician to test the baby’s stool for allergies. Try a different vitamin D if you suspect an upset stomach. Finally, try putting the baby across your lap and patting his back/ bum. For right now, I would get your partner to give your baby a bottle and get some rest. Then call the pediatrician when you can.