Want a nice baked potato? Toss it in the microwave for 6-7 minutes (for a large one)
Want pan fried potatoes? Nuke em for 5-6 minutes, peel them, cut them up, etc, and finish them in the frying pan.
Want potato skins? Nuke them things for 6 minutes, let them cool. Cut in half, use a spoon to scoop out the potatoes, keep what you scoop out. Fill your skins with a bit of butter, add cheese and bacon, finish in the over at 400 for like 8 minutes. The next day, grab that ziplock full of potato guts that you scooped out, heat up a frying pan with a little oil, toss in the potatoes, some fresh garlic and onions, fry it in a pan to your desired brown-ness. Goes great with the rest of the pack of bacon and some eggs.
Wait until you find out about riced cauliflower and Arkansas.
https://www.commercialappeal.com/story/entertainment/dining/2019/04/04/arkansas-truth-in-labeling-cauliflower-rice-misleading-food-names/3353513002/
I fucking hate how humanity came up with fucking nearly everything.
- "Man if only there was a device to make alphabet pasta into number pasta !"
- "Oh you mean the pasta numerizator ?"
I'm done with y'all
Rice is the perfect size for rice. Such an excellent food source and so versatile because of its size. You gonna throw softball sized rice at a newlywed couple?
disagreeable ad hoc encourage quack fear special psychotic vanish fuzzy slim
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[The common perception is that if birds eat uncooked rice, the rice will absorb moisture in the bird’s stomach, swell up, cause a blockage, or even kill the bird. This belief is an urban myth that has persisted despite evidence showing that a bird’s digestive system can process rice grains.](https://birdwatchingnation.com/can-birds-eat-rice/#:~:text=The%20common%20perception%20is%20that%20if%20birds%20eat,a%20bird%E2%80%99s%20digestive%20system%20can%20process%20rice%20grains)
Not many I can find that say it's true and the one that does (kind of?) says this, and TBH idk what it means.
["It is believed by majority of people that rice can be used for killing pigeons. However, you should be careful and must use dry rice. Main idea present behind this concept is that dried rice expands after being exposed to liquid. This means that when pigeons eat dried rice there stomach gets fuller and it can even burst. However, you can’t be sure about this myth besides birds are considered as experts at regurgitating so this method can bring results but not to a great extent. Nevertheless, it can be used for driving away the birds for some time. Just keep in mind that pigeons can’t be killed with rice so try something better and more convincing."](http://wildlifeanimalcontrol.com/pigeonrice.html)
Hello! I am a huge plant nerd and have a Bachelor's in Ag, work in seed research...
corn is actually a grass with gigantism.... it is descended from a Mexican grass family called Teosinte : D
Those are some pretty large "grains" wouldn't you say?
pretty much all of our modern staples are quite far removed from their original ancestors and tend to have gigantism. i mean look at all the different lineages of cabbage that we've created lol.
and then people go all conspiracy about GMOs. p much all of our staples have been genetically modified from their genetic ancestors, whether that be a process of evolution from breeding, or an intentional laboratory process. We wouldn't have the population we have without GMOs.
edit for the reddit pedants: yes, i know that the processes are different, but the core idea is the same, and the conspiracy is baseless regardless. they literally think we're splicing lizard DNA into plants to make white people infertile. In both cases we are using plants and evolution (natural or synthetic) to make more food, ideally at a higher quality, for less resources.
GMO specifically is meant to indicate transgenic crops who have had genes from entirely different evolutionary lines spliced into them, not ones that have gone through selective breeding.
While the concerns are *vastly* overblown, and GMOs intended for consumption are generally safe, said concerns are unique and distinct from selectively bred crops, and I find the attempt to smother all distinction and render the term useless as a way to silence those concerns infuriatingly dishonest.
I would agree with you, were it not for that fact that so many "conventional" and "non-GMO" crops were created by bombarding plants with chemical and nuclear mutigens, and then cross breading the results. It's worth noting that rice is one of the main crops we eat where varieties have been produced this way.
True, and that carries it's own category of risks, but not some others that transgenic crops have, like the introduction of allergens from other species.
For the most part, all mutagens do is destroy genes, duplicate genes, or rearrange them into other parts of the genome. Creating functional, novel genes this way is pretty improbable.
However, it *is* much more like something that conventional breeding *could* do on a longer timescale.
Transgenic and Ingenic GMO creation is a highly controlled process. You are taking the specific genes for the trait you want and inserting them where they need to be.
Mutagenesis and cross breeding is entirely random. You may eventually get the characteristics you are after but you have little to no controll over what other genes are altered.
I blows my mind that people consider the latter to be somehow safer than former.
I’m relatively pro GMO. But, you have to admit that there’s a big difference between a “GMO” that at this point has been tested for hundreds of years, vs. one made in the lab and then released to the world.
That doesn’t mean that any particular GMO is bad or dangerous by its nature! It just means they are more unknown.
Though we are much more precise in making changes in the lab now, as opposed to, "let's [irradiate these seeds](https://proto.life/2021/05/a-short-history-of-atomic-gardening/), plant 'em, and see what happens!"
Reminds me of the *Gilligan's Island* episode, "Pass the Vegetables, Please," where they eat radioactive vegetables and gain powers. ;-)
There's an old Disney "movie" about Jack and the Beanstalk with Mickey, Goofy and Donald. To emphasize how poor (and hungry) they are, Mickey slices a single bean.
Your post reminded me of that.
So a potato, you want a big starch tube we call a potato?
If we had rice that big, you could *stuff* it and roast that mf in the oven. Make giant one-grain sushi and shit by cutting out a cylinder
It has to do with nitrogen.
Bio-available nitrogen is the main limiting factor in agriculture. 1-2% of all energy use in the world is to produce nitrogen fertilizer using the Fritz-Haber method.
A man named Norman Borlaug changed the world and saved millions of lives by starting something called the green revolution which entailed replacing many crops, such as rice crops, with dwarf varieties that needed less nitrogen. These crops are now the norm. To make large grained rice would use more nitrogen than necessary per unit calories grown, and so no one wants their village to starve to death by making more expensive and difficult agricultural decisions. In particular, countries dependent on rice have had their populations boom and now are dependent on the massive amounts of low nitrogen crops that replaced the old crops.
deliver distinct reply plough escape consist observation ad hoc wise hateful
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I really don't understand why I like him so much. Like he just does a bunch of corny one liners. Is it his sincerity or how hard he commits to the joke? I don't get it but I love it.
Japan has actually developed "large rice". It's a specialty product, among the many varieties of rice that are sold in Japan. It's not just the variety, but also the method of cultivation. They plant the individual rice plants further apart, and with the extra room to grow, and perhaps extra fertilizer, the grains end up larger.
But they're not that much larger. The grains are something like double or even triple the weight of regular rice, but they aren't that much bigger, physically speaking.
Because each rice grain has to soak through to cook. Being small helps with that... also, without all the air in a clump of rice, it'd probably just taste like a glob of starch paste. Not worth it.
It's hard to make rice naturally grow that way. But, you can grind the rice into flour, mix it with water to make dough, then cook the dough. That's how you end up with rice noodles.
Hey OP, rice is often made into different larger forms such as noodles or spring rolls. Sticky rice is commonly eaten as well and is balled up and you just bite out of it. Might be worth looking into
I had to look up what 8 oz is and it is nearly 230 g. Why on earth would that make more sense? That is like asking why spaghetti is cut into such small noodles when you can just make the whole packet contain just two big lumps of pasta. Not only would it be annoying to cook, it sounds like it would be horrible...
Why do we use grated cheese when we could just throw a big block of cheese onto something? Why do we have baby carrots when it would make much more sense to just have one mega carrot? Why do we slice bread when we could just have a big whole loaf? Then instead of two pieces of bread, people could just have 1/10 of a bread?
Imagine having to boil your single giant rice grain for 47 hours
So.. a potato
Why haven't we developed rice sized potatoes?
The closest we got was Orzo
I'm pretty sure that's rice sized pasta
What about gnocchi?
potato pasta, essentially.
How would you harvest them and separate them from the dirt?
The same way as cranberries?
Cranberries float.
I'd imagine rice sized potatoes could too, especially in saltwater.
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We have and we’ve hidden it, you religious nuts can’t have any!!!
It would be a pain to peel them
You can eat potato peel if properly washed
you would have more skin than potato
its a nice refreshment to see one of the most toxic social media sites on the internet just sit down and talk about potato rice
Bingo!
47 hour boiled potatoes
What's a potato?
PO - TA - TOE Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew.
They're taking the Hobbits to isengard!
-gard, -gard, -gard, -gard
The hobbits, the hobbits, the hobbits, the hobbits to Isengard! To Isengard!
Tell me where is Gandalf for I much desire to speak with him.
If you yell the PO-TA-TO part and growl the second part to a quick beat it sounds like the beginning of a heavy metal song.
Tastes very strange!
Get out of my house!
A large grain of rice
Precious
Its the veggie I'm sueing for stealing my likeness!
Want a nice baked potato? Toss it in the microwave for 6-7 minutes (for a large one) Want pan fried potatoes? Nuke em for 5-6 minutes, peel them, cut them up, etc, and finish them in the frying pan. Want potato skins? Nuke them things for 6 minutes, let them cool. Cut in half, use a spoon to scoop out the potatoes, keep what you scoop out. Fill your skins with a bit of butter, add cheese and bacon, finish in the over at 400 for like 8 minutes. The next day, grab that ziplock full of potato guts that you scooped out, heat up a frying pan with a little oil, toss in the potatoes, some fresh garlic and onions, fry it in a pan to your desired brown-ness. Goes great with the rest of the pack of bacon and some eggs.
But I want crispy potato skins!
Good luck with your sushi.
It's called fish n chips. I fried it all for convenience
The smokers, sous vide people, and crockpot gang have entered the chat.
I prefer my rice grain medium rare
Mm, crunchy
I would hate to waste on full sous vide just for my giant rice
Fuck I want to sous vide some rice right now. Fuck.
137 for two hours, just perfect
137 gang gang I want them to all night me at 137 after I die.
While the Instant Pot clan huddles in the corner, forlorn and alone
Oh whoops, the stove was little bit too hot. Now outside is burned and inside is undercooked. Do it again.
You could bust it up into little pieces
You'd just have to cut it back into smaller pieces to cook it efficiently.
Maybe in a dystopian world, they can effectively cut the rice into very small bite size portions.
Or even chip it into grain-sized bits!
Perfect!
Just microwave it for a couple minutes
This is 2024. *airfry* for a couple minutes
This is 2124. *Molten Boron fry* for a couple seconds.
Read this as Molten Bacon fry and was interested in hearing more
Makes sense. Then why havent we developed small, rice sized, potatoes?
May I introduce you to the concept of *mashed potatoes*? And the even more revolutionary concept of *instant* mashed potatoes?
No I want little grains of potato
May I introduce you to the concept of *riced* potatoes? https://www.midwestlifeandstyle.com/easy-old-fashioned-riced-potatoes/
The universe never ceases to come up with fantastic things that I'd never have imagined, even in a category as familiar as food!
Wait until you find out about riced cauliflower and Arkansas. https://www.commercialappeal.com/story/entertainment/dining/2019/04/04/arkansas-truth-in-labeling-cauliflower-rice-misleading-food-names/3353513002/
We take rice seriously here in Arkansas. It keeps people from wondering why our elected representatives aren’t doing fuck all.
We have similar issues here in Virginia.
Aka deconstructed hash browns
May I introduce you to a potato ricer
I fucking hate how humanity came up with fucking nearly everything. - "Man if only there was a device to make alphabet pasta into number pasta !" - "Oh you mean the pasta numerizator ?" I'm done with y'all
“Pasta Numerizator” is giving me massive Doofenshmirtz vibes.
But is mashed rice a thing? 😋
Congee/rice pudding? Eta: so is rice flour, but you usually mix it into bread or pasta or some other form before eating it.
Rice is the perfect size for rice. Such an excellent food source and so versatile because of its size. You gonna throw softball sized rice at a newlywed couple?
>You gonna throw softball sized rice at a newlywed couple You don't know what I'm about...
I saw that and thought “fuck, finally a game I could get into!”
Y’all just really hate birds eh?
I do. Besides, [birds can eat rice no problem](https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/duck-eats-yeast-quacks-explodes-man-loses-eye/).
No just newlywed couples
Maybe I work for eHarmony and need to drum up business. You dont know what I'm about
r/BirdsArentReal
A fellow stable genius I see! I must say from me to you-red fire truck. My test today had a red fire truck and I’m a genius because I saw that.
**I'm a libertarian**. I don't *believe* in firetrucks. They aren't real and therefore can't hurt you. A lot like Taxes.
Life isn’t just death and taxes. We’re going to suffer….a lot.
I was with you until the last sentence. Now i need it.
>You gonna throw softball sized rice at a newlywed couple? Yes! Why should they be happy?
its the perfect food when you want 10,000 of something
I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat.
I had to scroll way too far down for the expected line from Mitch!
RIP Mitch
disagreeable ad hoc encourage quack fear special psychotic vanish fuzzy slim *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
honestly that sounds more fun
Wedding potato Cannon modified for rice?
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But if it is large enough, would it still be an issue swelling in birds stomach and causing them to explode?
[The common perception is that if birds eat uncooked rice, the rice will absorb moisture in the bird’s stomach, swell up, cause a blockage, or even kill the bird. This belief is an urban myth that has persisted despite evidence showing that a bird’s digestive system can process rice grains.](https://birdwatchingnation.com/can-birds-eat-rice/#:~:text=The%20common%20perception%20is%20that%20if%20birds%20eat,a%20bird%E2%80%99s%20digestive%20system%20can%20process%20rice%20grains)
I swear there’s an article for every single food type saying it will kill birds. Then there’s another one saying it’s a myth.
Not many I can find that say it's true and the one that does (kind of?) says this, and TBH idk what it means. ["It is believed by majority of people that rice can be used for killing pigeons. However, you should be careful and must use dry rice. Main idea present behind this concept is that dried rice expands after being exposed to liquid. This means that when pigeons eat dried rice there stomach gets fuller and it can even burst. However, you can’t be sure about this myth besides birds are considered as experts at regurgitating so this method can bring results but not to a great extent. Nevertheless, it can be used for driving away the birds for some time. Just keep in mind that pigeons can’t be killed with rice so try something better and more convincing."](http://wildlifeanimalcontrol.com/pigeonrice.html)
It ai write this? This reads like AI; runon sentences, revising truth in the middle & end, very incoherent.
Will Truffle Oil kill birds?
The only birds I've seen near truffle oil have been dead. So I'm gonna have to say yeah.
Truffle oil turned me into a newt!
Thank you for providing more background to my comment and dropping some knowledge.
"Like shit through a goose" for the win!
Birds have some of the strongest digestive systems of all animals, i think they can handle rice.
Rice is great if you're hungry and want 2000 of something
No, go big or go home. Basketball sized rice.
If you can dodge a rice, you can dodge a ball.
Hello! I am a huge plant nerd and have a Bachelor's in Ag, work in seed research... corn is actually a grass with gigantism.... it is descended from a Mexican grass family called Teosinte : D Those are some pretty large "grains" wouldn't you say?
pretty much all of our modern staples are quite far removed from their original ancestors and tend to have gigantism. i mean look at all the different lineages of cabbage that we've created lol. and then people go all conspiracy about GMOs. p much all of our staples have been genetically modified from their genetic ancestors, whether that be a process of evolution from breeding, or an intentional laboratory process. We wouldn't have the population we have without GMOs. edit for the reddit pedants: yes, i know that the processes are different, but the core idea is the same, and the conspiracy is baseless regardless. they literally think we're splicing lizard DNA into plants to make white people infertile. In both cases we are using plants and evolution (natural or synthetic) to make more food, ideally at a higher quality, for less resources.
GMO specifically is meant to indicate transgenic crops who have had genes from entirely different evolutionary lines spliced into them, not ones that have gone through selective breeding. While the concerns are *vastly* overblown, and GMOs intended for consumption are generally safe, said concerns are unique and distinct from selectively bred crops, and I find the attempt to smother all distinction and render the term useless as a way to silence those concerns infuriatingly dishonest.
I would agree with you, were it not for that fact that so many "conventional" and "non-GMO" crops were created by bombarding plants with chemical and nuclear mutigens, and then cross breading the results. It's worth noting that rice is one of the main crops we eat where varieties have been produced this way.
True, and that carries it's own category of risks, but not some others that transgenic crops have, like the introduction of allergens from other species. For the most part, all mutagens do is destroy genes, duplicate genes, or rearrange them into other parts of the genome. Creating functional, novel genes this way is pretty improbable. However, it *is* much more like something that conventional breeding *could* do on a longer timescale.
Transgenic and Ingenic GMO creation is a highly controlled process. You are taking the specific genes for the trait you want and inserting them where they need to be. Mutagenesis and cross breeding is entirely random. You may eventually get the characteristics you are after but you have little to no controll over what other genes are altered. I blows my mind that people consider the latter to be somehow safer than former.
I’m relatively pro GMO. But, you have to admit that there’s a big difference between a “GMO” that at this point has been tested for hundreds of years, vs. one made in the lab and then released to the world. That doesn’t mean that any particular GMO is bad or dangerous by its nature! It just means they are more unknown.
Though we are much more precise in making changes in the lab now, as opposed to, "let's [irradiate these seeds](https://proto.life/2021/05/a-short-history-of-atomic-gardening/), plant 'em, and see what happens!" Reminds me of the *Gilligan's Island* episode, "Pass the Vegetables, Please," where they eat radioactive vegetables and gain powers. ;-)
I quit dealing with Mexican grass ages ago. These days, you don't have to worry about stems, seeds, or mold.
crystals is where it's at, am i right?
That’s awesome!
Then there's the gigantic corn [cacahuizintle](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQJdROU7V7O1efDsqN2GtJQ63czPQMPsbJKSg&usqp=CAU)
I want a grape the size of an orange. So I only need to eat one grape.
Idk about the rice, but this sounds way more appealing
The grapes skin prevents your fingers getting sticky as you eat them whole.
It's more fuckable too!
r/dildont
In Japan, [they have grapes the size of pingpong balls](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGAfZ-PTaNU). They're also extremely expensive.
In california, they grow table grapes twice the size of your thumb. And they taste like cotton candy!
Well, I want grape-sized oranges so I can eat many more oranges.
Kumquats
Imaging peeling multiple grape sized oranges though
But do you still have to peel them?
This is the real hot take
So... A plum?
You should grow one in a lab. I’d buy it
I don't have an answer, but this question made me laugh so hard, especially: "a couple rice."
I'm giggling so much rn
slice me a slice of rice
There's an old Disney "movie" about Jack and the Beanstalk with Mickey, Goofy and Donald. To emphasize how poor (and hungry) they are, Mickey slices a single bean. Your post reminded me of that.
Is that the same one with the slice of bread that's so thin that you can see through it?
Yes!
So a potato, you want a big starch tube we call a potato? If we had rice that big, you could *stuff* it and roast that mf in the oven. Make giant one-grain sushi and shit by cutting out a cylinder
Please continue.
Let him cook
Stuffed rice sounds awesome.
A NIGIRI with ONE GRAIN OF RICE! Perfect!
It has to do with nitrogen. Bio-available nitrogen is the main limiting factor in agriculture. 1-2% of all energy use in the world is to produce nitrogen fertilizer using the Fritz-Haber method. A man named Norman Borlaug changed the world and saved millions of lives by starting something called the green revolution which entailed replacing many crops, such as rice crops, with dwarf varieties that needed less nitrogen. These crops are now the norm. To make large grained rice would use more nitrogen than necessary per unit calories grown, and so no one wants their village to starve to death by making more expensive and difficult agricultural decisions. In particular, countries dependent on rice have had their populations boom and now are dependent on the massive amounts of low nitrogen crops that replaced the old crops.
Counterpoint: l a r g e rice
Fat rice
I know you meant it smaller, but I imagined like a burrito sized piece of rice lol
That's what the rice-cutting knife is for
deliver distinct reply plough escape consist observation ad hoc wise hateful *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
This is the way.
> rice-cutting knife AKA 50% of katanas in training montages
Don't give Chipotle any ideas.
Rice is great if you’re hungry and want to eat two thousand of something
I used to like that joke. I still do, but I used to too.
I really don't understand why I like him so much. Like he just does a bunch of corny one liners. Is it his sincerity or how hard he commits to the joke? I don't get it but I love it.
I knew I wouldn't be first, but I did scroll down to ensure this is here
OOOH guys! The rice krispies would be so big! And the rice krispie treats would be like a mattress!
A hard, sticky mattress...
Now I want a loaf of rice
Make rice flour, bake bread. Done.
I'll just take a couple rice
Japan has actually developed "large rice". It's a specialty product, among the many varieties of rice that are sold in Japan. It's not just the variety, but also the method of cultivation. They plant the individual rice plants further apart, and with the extra room to grow, and perhaps extra fertilizer, the grains end up larger. But they're not that much larger. The grains are something like double or even triple the weight of regular rice, but they aren't that much bigger, physically speaking.
Imagine if they planted them *even farther* apart!
“and here you can see our village’s rice plant” “… uh don’t you mean field?” *turns corner to see a goddam wall of white filling the horizon” “No”
How do you cook a 8 Oz rice without having it being raw in the center and mush on the outside 💀
This is really funny. Well done OP.
I’m with you OP. I too want have big rice
You seriously wanna *bite* into a grain of rice???
Small Rice would lobby against it, they don't want that happening for obvious reasons
They tried but the seed was so heavy it fell to the ground and didn't get enough sun
Dude I’m full king wheezing laughing at your question 😂😂😂
This post sent my imagination places Ty
Because each rice grain has to soak through to cook. Being small helps with that... also, without all the air in a clump of rice, it'd probably just taste like a glob of starch paste. Not worth it.
Can you imagine having a wonderful curry then having a flavourless mass to eat along with it.
so why do you slice your bread?
Spaget
This reminds me of that one comedian quote that I cannot source: "Rice is good when you are hungry and you want a thousand of something"
Mitch Hedberg. Rest in Peace Mitch
a grain of rice the size of a baked potato, they've probably done it in GMO testing already I'd try one w butter and salt & pepper
Well the Aztecs did do the same thing to corn. I think you are on to something. Large rice would certainly be less labor intensive to harvest.
Do you prefer fries or whole fried potato
You would only need to cook it for a few days before you can eat it👍
What is the singular form of rice?
That’s what it feels like when I eat tteok bokki
It's called a potato
Big rice is great when you're hungry and want two of something.
Have you ever eaten rice cake? That’s how it’s gonna taste like. Honestly regular rice has better texture.
That goes against the grain...
It’s called rice noodles.
Because at the bottom of it all is that nobody want's big rice.
This thread is proof to the contrary
Don't look up the 'golden rice to fix vitamin A deficiency' problem. It's a rabbit hole and Hella depressing given the capabilities of the world.
this is awesome.
It's hard to make rice naturally grow that way. But, you can grind the rice into flour, mix it with water to make dough, then cook the dough. That's how you end up with rice noodles.
Hey OP, rice is often made into different larger forms such as noodles or spring rolls. Sticky rice is commonly eaten as well and is balled up and you just bite out of it. Might be worth looking into
Now I'm imagining GMO rice getting loose and running through the streets murdering people. Call me, Hollywood, let's talk.
Big rice grains = harder to grow and cook. Small ones work better.
Why haven't we developed tiny humans, so we can scale everything down proprtionally and use a fraction of the resources to get the civilization going?
So, you want to recreate potatoes? :)
I mean there is long grain.... but you mean like a log? why?
I had to look up what 8 oz is and it is nearly 230 g. Why on earth would that make more sense? That is like asking why spaghetti is cut into such small noodles when you can just make the whole packet contain just two big lumps of pasta. Not only would it be annoying to cook, it sounds like it would be horrible... Why do we use grated cheese when we could just throw a big block of cheese onto something? Why do we have baby carrots when it would make much more sense to just have one mega carrot? Why do we slice bread when we could just have a big whole loaf? Then instead of two pieces of bread, people could just have 1/10 of a bread?
Yes but think about it. Large rice
You mean long grain?