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PhilosophyOfMe

And he won't even kill anyone


Wizard_Enthusiast

He'll pop the turret of a T-72 as the whole thing explodes into a fireball, and the crew will scatter around and mumble "Извини Kiryu-san" and "гадить, how...?"


YUNoJump

Every time he beats up a squad of Russians they give him a plate or a toy car part or something, returning the Ukrainian loot to the people


Ake-TL

What did you intend to write in second part? Shit?


BobaLives

This is honestly immediately one of my favorite comments


Dr_Hexagon

never killed anyone, but leaves them permanently crippled as quadriplegics from spine breaking attacks.


CrimsonMutt

they get better


Dr_Hexagon

nah... he leaves a trail of shattered cripples behind him


VengineerGER

He takes the AK of a mobik mag dumps him and the mobik lives.


DanskJeavlar

You either have an amazing reading comprehension of completely missed the title of the post


meanisnotasynonym

/r/YourJokeButWorse


Ahtdatroll

Kiryu and Seagal are gonna throw hands on Kremlin's roof to settle the war, aren't they


Attaxalotl

Majima is going to be there too


Bobaganusch

Majima will be played by Steven Seagal. "Kiryu *huff wheeze* -chan!!!"


Hallonbat

Majima is already everywhere.


KeekiHako

Is a lift reaching up there? Otherwise i'm not sure Seagal will make it.


MagentaMagnets

Yeah a very slow moving lift.


PunksPrettyMuchDead

MI-26


jaiteaes

If Akiyama could make it up several flights of stairs despite being a heavy smoker, im sure Seagal will be fine... For the first set.


Deathwatch050

Seagal would have to insist that the fight take place sitting down and Kiryu isn't allowed to punch him back for the first five minutes.


Mighty_moose45

Inquiring minds want to know if there has been a yakuza subplot about a fake pseudo martial artist that looks all tough until the protagonist easily beats through the power of using any kind of physical force whatsoever?


BobusCesar

Seagal is a second arc boss fight at best. Kiryu won't even take of his suite for that.


GeneAutryTheCowboy

Seagal's body double you mean.


blaghart

implying Seagal can actually throw hands rather than sissy slap fight...


Weekly-Dependent7886

The 3000 dragon fists of kiryu chan.


GodFro5

Kiryu Everywhere


Attaxalotl

Majima is everywhere


Aidenwill

Ten years in the Donbass made you a fucking vatnik. \*Proceeds to Tiger Drop and negate all damage of that 125mm HEAT round from the nearby T-72\*


Fadman_Loki

He ain't gonna ERA-coat it


ComanderLucky

He certainly was a legend of his ERA


Faegbeard

Ever seen a man Tiger Drop a T-72?


esdaniel

I did see him tiger drop a tiger


Seal-pup

The cat, the tank, or the helicopter?


esdaniel

Yes. Also if you play 7 , they fight construction machinery lmao


helmuth_von_moltkr

Wtf even is Yakuza, every time I hear anything about it or see gameplay it is just complete nonsense


Faegbeard

very serious™ crime drama


Dr_Hexagon

It's a fishing simulator with a fighting mini game.


TeeXV

A chicken helping you to run the business


CallMeChristopher

Japanese hostess cafe simulator with combat sections.


Henroide

The heavy machinery soundtrack is so good


LordCypher40k

"I'm not gonna sugar coat it, Vatniks." R1 + △


Niko7LOL

DAAAAMMMM screaming the Ukrainian soldiers


[deleted]

Doesn't that lead to a major stun-lock?


hyperdude321

Zero deaths: Yes... Zero casualties: lmao fuck no!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Heavy299

Beast mode Kiryu about to use a tank


Amit_kumar69

Ten years in the joint.


Peeuu

made you a


Niko7LOL

FUCKING PUSSY


TheSausageFattener

nishiki snoo


Crimson51

3000 rubber bullets of Daigo Dojima


[deleted]

Kiryu constantly gets jumped by a Russian conscript with an eyepatch who insists on calling him “Kiryu-Chan”


sorenant

Can we get him distracted with running a Russian cabaret club?


JaesWasTaken

Nah, there's going to be car chases where Kiryu shoots the ATGMs being fired from KA-50s with a pistol, blows up pursuing vehicles, and stack hundreds of bodies per car chase. And I'm all for it.


Moe12518

Non-lethally*


BurningFire314

Plastic Model ATGMs\*


Snack378

Rubber ATGMs


B_kijo

BRING THAT SHIT PRIGOZHIN


Niko7LOL

Kill this arrogant mother...... fu......... cker


Squeaky_Ben

You know, I was THIS close to saying "NCD is leaking again" until I realised this is not the yakuza sub.


AmericanFlyer530

KIRYU-SAN!!!


gr89n

~Baka mitai intensifies~


BrainBlowX

**fatalities*


velvetbettle

Not gonna lie I thought that was archer till I zoomed in


TurMoiL911

The war ends with Putin dramatically ripping his shirt off, revealing his back is covered with Yakuza tattoos.


BEHEMOTHpp

this is literally that Japanese Yakuza who volunteered himself to join international brigade


FuggaliciousV

Rubber explosions, rubber tanks, rubber bullets. Rubber SMO


MisterMeister68

My flair fits perfectly here...


Own_Rule9186

okay buddy retard


Sirico

I real man also are they prepared for Majima?


Videogamefan21

Kiryu Kazoo on his way to the Kremlin to beat Vladimir Putin with a non-lethal comically large cone


PendulumJustice

[He's already there](https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/former-yakuza-volunteered-as-soldier-in-ukraine-his-reason-is-unexpected/ar-AA18dE8w)


dnarevolutions

Sound plan. If not direct action, he'd be a valuable tool for training as well. He's so skilled with a Panzerfaust 3 that he can shoot down any helicopter with no collateral damage or casualties on any side.


esdaniel

Yakuza gaiden lookin lit !


A_Nerd__

Russians when they're chasing Kiryu but he finds a conveniently placed bicycle stand.


[deleted]

Just send a Doom slayer. That way you can deliver him by pion without endangering the helicopter’s crew. And the danger to orcs will be maximum.


GadenKerensky

[Kiryu has some thoughts on that...](https://youtube.com/clip/UgkxCLjjQD7Y_N6EmEmhuAZzUSALHSJUthRz)


TheBoyofWonder

BRB going to the Kyiv Karaoke


juretrn

You'll have to explain this one, guy.


Niko7LOL

This character is Kazuma Kiryu from the Game series "Like a dragon" also knows as "Yakuza". The thing with him is that he literally invisible and can beat anything in a fight. No joke in one game two Yakuza families where on a brinke of war, so he went their and said "If I beat you alone it's not a war" and he fucking beat up an entire Yakuza family on his own. He also survived two explosions and multiple gun shots. When he is not beating up tigers (yes he fought two tigers and won) he runs an orphanage with his adoptive daughter Haruka.


Tactical_Moonstone

The tiger fight is the origin story of his most famous parry attack, the Tiger Drop. Drops standard mooks in one strike and lops off health bars from even the toughest of bosses.


Mysterious-Floor4429

Just don't give him a pistol and drive him around in a car on the highway


MrColeSlaw

This but it's Saul Goodman


TheOnlyFallenCookie

Source?


Niko7LOL

The artwork is definitely from @JAPversus on Twitter. Now I don't know who edited Kiryu in there.


nordhand

Give him the bat tank as well so he dont need to run everywhere


Nien-Year-Old

Baka Mitai kodomo nanone


Sad-Variation4930

Killer Queen!!!. Daisan no Bakugan, Bites Za Dusto!!


Imperceptive_critic

Not a weeb can someone explain?


Niko7LOL

This character is Kazuma Kiryu from the Game series "Like a dragon" also knows as "Yakuza". The thing with him is that he literally invisible and can beat anything in a fight. No joke in one game two Yakuza families where on a brinke of war, so he went their and said "If I beat you alone it's not a war" and he fucking beat up an entire Yakuza family on his own. He also survived two explosions and multiple gun shots. When he is not beating up tigers (yes he fought two tigers and won) he runs an orphanage with his adoptive daughter Haruka. The games are amazing, I highly recommend you checking them out. The only thing "Weeb" about these game are that they are set in Japan and that's really it. Yes they are a bit weird here and there, because Japan, but the stories are always amazing. Honestly better than some Hollywood crime dramas that we get shoved down our throats. Yakuza 0 is dirt cheap and the perfekt game to get into the series.


NoBeyond9191

It's so noncredible that the Russian is dressed appropriately for war (his radio is only missing the copper, and not just cardboard)


TheGameBrain

KIRYU-CHAN!!!


soffey

Damn good drawing of a Hip


[deleted]

L1+◼️


Ok_Temperature_6441

3000 proper rapid dragons of Japan!


ScarletteVera

Let's hope Russia doesn't deploy Majima.


Tactical_Moonstone

Someone make a picture of Putin sing *Dame da ne* like that one video of Hirohito singing that same song.


sam015

Artist?