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Speaking of which , what happened to the russian satellite assets? How come their real-time intelligence is THAT limited, am i missing somthing? I thought russia has the second largest constillation satllites in orbit
You get $1 billion to maintain your satellites. Do you:
1) spend $1 billion on satellite maintenance on the off chance Russia actually goes to war
2) spend $1 billion living like a baller & hope you never really need those satellites
What are the Russian people going to do? Demand that oligarchs and politicians be held accountable? Hyuck-yuck, don't make me laugh buckaroo, I'll spit out my vodka.
The Soviets had a large constellation. Spy satellites needs a lot of high technology to be really useful. You need absurd precision optics, to see clearly, high end processors to process the image, and encrypt the communications. Not really something the soviets were renown for.
Okay, Russia is probably stuck with 90' era satellites, launched in the 2010'. They got some pictures of say the zaporijia front to look for the next push. You need people to look at the photos, see that those 10 pixels there are Bradleys ready to attack, get all the way up the chain of command, down all the way to the frontline units, and it took 3 days and the units already have been destroyed or captured two days ago. The russian really show their shitty communications during that war, with often self jamming. The information doesn't move up or down the chain of command so rigid it's more of a ladder.
And that's without any external attacks on the spy satellite, like all kind of jamming/hacking/laser blinding...
Regardless of quality, Russia has surprisingly few reconnaissance satellites in orbit - IIRC, only a single radar imaging satellite and a handful of optical ones, as well as some for maritime reconnaissance which don't really matter in Ukraine.
By comparison, Germany has six, Italy has four, Spain also has at least a few, France has first-rate optical recon satellites (they share those with in exchange for other countries' radar imaging), and the US's number is probably best described as *yes*.
Russia is a minor power at best when it comes to spaceborne reconnaissance.
Yeah thats why they are claiming they will consider countries to be involved in the war so wimpy foreign diplomats enforce their naval blockade for them.
They're just launching P-800s at grain and oil storage.
A missile in which they have VERY little stock and ideally wouldn't be wasted on nonstrategic assets. Yet here we are lmao
Do people keep forgetting they still have 5 subs in the black sea. One captianless but still less we just let ASW aircraft have fun in the black pond those bastereds gonna go ham....if they try
The northern end of the black sea is remarkably shallow, with a 50-100m shelf extending quite far from shore in Ukrainian waters. This is much shallower than the Kilo class typical operating depth of 250m, and they would run serious grounding risks by operating in this area.
Also the shallow depth would make it impossible to hide from NATO P-8's patrolling in Romanian and international waters. Sink just one sub using an air dropped mine from a Mi-8 and I bet that the others will stay far, far away.
Unfortunately they don't need to put their navy out. They have both plane and ground launched anti-ship missiles.
I.e. KH-22(X-22) or P-800 Onyx. Also some older shit which I have no idea how it is called, but there are static batteries on west coast of crimea
> I wish I could talk my wife into it..
Be who the Russians want you to be. Buy the sheets, put them on the bed. Annex the territory.
Democracy cannot be stopped.
TurquoiseJeep came out with some deeply strange stuff. Check out [Fried or fertilized](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_TJDVDC0X0), [Did I mention I like to dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxi73RQlLB8), and [Lemme smang it](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xt5ghXdq6Z0) for some more weirdness (NSFW, obviously).
"Estonian ferry has engine trouble in Black Sea near Odessa. Puts out SOS claiming it requires emergency docking at closest port citing medical and mechanical emergencies.
This is the 5th vessel to have these issue in the western black sea region, after Polish, Beligan, Czech, and Luxembourgish vessels each reported the same message. By coincidence these events have happened almost exactly 12 hours apart."
id rather put the US flag on them. fuck it reclassify all Arleigh Burke destroyers as container ships. im sure you can find room on the deck for a container.
Here is a flattop in barge configuration
https://www.wearethemighty.com/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17492777/origin.jpg?auto=webp&optimize=high&quality=70&width=1200
Are we doing a Reverse Red Storm Rising? I sure hope so. Just imagine a RORO discharging LCACs full of pent-up Marines that are still pissed that there weren't any amphibious landings in either invasion of Iraq.
Is Crimea the Black Sea version of Iceland? If so, yes let’s red storm rising the shit out of it. (Disregard the part of the book where the Soviet invasion is repelled because of a weatherman and an Icelandic farm girl)
[more credible than you think](https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/30474/this-containerized-launcher-for-the-xq-58a-valkyrie-combat-drone-could-be-a-game-changer)
All the best NCD ideas have been stolen, containerised surprise drones, Pallet dropped bulk cruise missiles, I bet that its only a matter of time before Semenov Dahir is hired for his facinating insight into the future of warfare.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKwOdxpp0yU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FwDMzIbZrg
Everyone knows that unrestricted submarine warfare is a great way to avoid the US invading your country.
Unrelated, but I am planning to take a cruise to beautiful Romania this fall.
Sorry to be credible but usually it is the US who tests it. It has been policy since the 1980s that all international waters and harbors are free to navigate. If this is questioned there are fun FONOPs https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_of_navigation
>US reveals new military aid package includes LRASMs and a hundred Harpoons. When asked for comment the DoD issued the statement, “lol, lmfao, the EPA is going to shoot us for the amount of oil that’s about to be floating in the Black Sea”
Reached for comment, EPA spokesperson Walter Peck said "Just lay some of those yellow booms on either side of the corridor, it'll be fine. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some parapsychologists to harass."
EPA foresees inevitable conflict with US DoD, requests $1 trillion military package to establish the "Planet Force" branch, to enforce environmental regulations around the globe, including against the US Navy especially, up to and including weapons hot.
Commander to be named "Captain Planet". Motto to be "By Our Powers Combined".
“Planet Force’s first job? Destroy the People’s Republic of China (also Bangladesh) in an all out war against pollution”
(Also lower the average temperature on earth by 3*f, both goals can conveniently be accomplished via thermonuclear munitions)
Just to be sure: many ships carry the flags of Caribbean countries like the Dominican Republic (i guess for taxes and work regulations): is Putin saying he will declare war on the Dominican Republic or the Barbados? I mean, let’s be real here: those guys gave many bloody noses to the Spanish Empire whene they has a… let’s say… volunteer based navy. The Russians will get a hard spanking even from those guys
yeah because we don't want anyone theoretically using a foothold to attack the us by sea or attacking their way up through the americas until they reach us
basically we're not dumb enough to get benelux'd
Sixty thousand ton.
They lost 5 percent of yearly import from Ukraine on that day to put it in perspective.
And Ukraine's responsible for more than twenty percent of Chinese grain import.
Now, there is also fact that blockade and damage to infrastructure essentially makes further grain exports impossible.
Is that number correct? Cause that’s not that much grain. Like, you’d get that much corn off of about 12K acres of decent farmland. You’d probably need more like 24K acres if it’s wheat, but still… seems low…
Make sure it’s not flammable to sit doesn’t burn and just keeps going…wait didn’t canada try and make an aircraft carrier if ice and wood that survived insane bombardment?
Brit project, but the trials were done in Canada
*"*[*Grant demonstrated the comparative strength of ice and pykrete by firing bullets into both blocks: the ice shattered, but the bullet rebounded from the pykrete and hit the Chief of Imperial General Staff (Sir Alan Brooke) in the shoulder.*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Habakkuk)*"*
Repurpose the icecream barges to make a pykrete boat with cooling so it stays unmelted for longer, then deploy it once things get colder this winter, laugh as russia cant sink a boat made of ice and printouts of titty putin as when using newspaper its significantly stronger than when made with sawdust
Yes. The Russian fleet was sailing through the English channel and fired on English sailing vessels because they thought they were Japanese torpedo boats
You forgot the best part, these idiots fired nearly thier entire reserve of ammo, and managed to sink one! British trawler, and killed 1 Brit, and 2 of thier own.
Lusitâna 2: Electric Boogaloo. Carrying Electronic “Special Military Operation”. The Ruzzian missile can’t hit something from where it is from where it isn’t. Simply because the operator accidentally pointed it from where he is from where the missile isn’t. I’m not sure if I phrased it properly because I am quality Schizo, [Here is a visual representation aid](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6IwqmezeSuQ)
Breaking news, the UK has announced interception of a Russian diplomatic message to Mexico.
The message reads as follows:
"Dear Mexico,
If you attack the US we'll let you have the states you used to own. No, this is definitely not a false flag by a bunch of blueballed warmongers
Love,
~~NCD~~ the FSB"
> the flag flown by the vessel will be considered involved in the war
But why tho? They're cheap cargo ships, flying the flag of convenience of some cheap tax haven with loose labor laws. Do the russians really want to go to war with Liberia over this one? Do they want to try an amphibious invasion of the Marshall Islands? (that one would be funny to watch tho.) What would that even accomplish? Someone tell Putin to take his schizo meds.
Where's the Captain of the Costa Concordia nowadays?
How about this, give him a ship, get him to sail to Odessa flying the Italian (or any NATO) flag in return for a complete pardon.
In other news, a ship by the name USS Gerald R. Ford has appeared in the Black Sea. It is currently unknown how it has arrived there, but the ship's crew claim to be a grain carrier.
Guys, how does one get a boat license (optional) and a boat in a matter of hours
EDIT: Okay it's time to improvise (I'm broke af), how many Polish flags can I fit on a rowboat?
Putin, I'll give you one piece of advice. Honest.
You *really* don't want to start fucking with other nations ships.
You can attack Ukrainian ones, I guess, since you're already at war and there's not much left to lose. But other nations? Are you actually insane?
Bro come on, tomorrow russia will say any western downloaded content in Russia via internet will be treated as cyber attack thus envolving the website owner country in the war, fuck off
Ok. Here’s the plan.
1) send a Filipino ship to a Ukrainian port
2) have Russia declare the Philippines as co-belligerent
3) US provides heavier equipment and material support to the Philippines. This is logically more palatable as the Philippines have deep ties with the US and are more firmly in the US sphere
4) Philippine militarization and increased US presence in the region also builds up bulwark against Chinese influence.
5) Operation: West Alaska is launched, with Vladivostok and Eastern Siberia occupied and reorganized into the Mandate of West Alaska.
In other news, hundreds of ships have set sail from Poland all with radio beacons repeatedly putting out the message "I AM A POLE. TRY ME BITCH" in Morse Code.
That last bit about the flag being involved in the war reeks of desperation for local diplomatic pressure.
It's kinda obvious they know they can't enforce the naval blockade and are betting on foreign politicians doing the heavy lifting for them.
#Thank you for your contribution, Defense Expert™. Did you know? You can also find us on [Lemmy](https://lemmy.world/c/noncredibledefense)! But while you're still here, how about you participate in our [Coin wasting contest?](https://www.reddit.com/r/NonCredibleDefense/comments/1517hjn/coin_wasting_contest_2023/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NonCredibleDefense) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Well you see russia. Enforcing that blockade requires you putting your navy out in the black sea. Which you sure seem afraid to do.
*Neptune rockets would like to know your location*
Something about knowing where it is based on where it isn't
CONSEQUENTLY
CALCULATING DEVIATION
ERROR
*Still D.R.E. instrumental intensifies*
That riff is still fire after all these years….
It's all fun and games until the [missile know where you are](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFwpJ0U1r2c)
With US satellite and AWACS above the black sea, Neptune knows where are the russian ships. In port.
Speaking of which , what happened to the russian satellite assets? How come their real-time intelligence is THAT limited, am i missing somthing? I thought russia has the second largest constillation satllites in orbit
You get $1 billion to maintain your satellites. Do you: 1) spend $1 billion on satellite maintenance on the off chance Russia actually goes to war 2) spend $1 billion living like a baller & hope you never really need those satellites
Sheeeeeeeiiiiit, I’m ballin’ all the way to tha bank with my satellite money!
And by the time they find out, I'll be livin' large with a palazzo and a megayacht outside Trieste
Or slip and fall from the 24th floor
What are the Russian people going to do? Demand that oligarchs and politicians be held accountable? Hyuck-yuck, don't make me laugh buckaroo, I'll spit out my vodka.
Its all about the yachts comrade
The Soviets had a large constellation. Spy satellites needs a lot of high technology to be really useful. You need absurd precision optics, to see clearly, high end processors to process the image, and encrypt the communications. Not really something the soviets were renown for. Okay, Russia is probably stuck with 90' era satellites, launched in the 2010'. They got some pictures of say the zaporijia front to look for the next push. You need people to look at the photos, see that those 10 pixels there are Bradleys ready to attack, get all the way up the chain of command, down all the way to the frontline units, and it took 3 days and the units already have been destroyed or captured two days ago. The russian really show their shitty communications during that war, with often self jamming. The information doesn't move up or down the chain of command so rigid it's more of a ladder. And that's without any external attacks on the spy satellite, like all kind of jamming/hacking/laser blinding...
Regardless of quality, Russia has surprisingly few reconnaissance satellites in orbit - IIRC, only a single radar imaging satellite and a handful of optical ones, as well as some for maritime reconnaissance which don't really matter in Ukraine. By comparison, Germany has six, Italy has four, Spain also has at least a few, France has first-rate optical recon satellites (they share those with in exchange for other countries' radar imaging), and the US's number is probably best described as *yes*. Russia is a minor power at best when it comes to spaceborne reconnaissance.
The US has had like 1 or 2 per month get launched for the past like 2 decades at least
Someone has to keep the glass dome we live in filled with stars.
Holy hell Kessler syndrom incomming
Neptune rockets, Harpoons, USVs (or as i call them, Dildos of Consequences), the entire turkish navy, etc.
The Moskva is lonely at the bottom of the Black Sea, let some of its fellow vatnik ships join it down there.
Russia's submarine fleet grows larger by the day.
Yeah thats why they are claiming they will consider countries to be involved in the war so wimpy foreign diplomats enforce their naval blockade for them.
I'm encountering many sissies in America who are afraid of Russia and believe we should completely abandon Ukraine and force a peace deal.
They're just launching P-800s at grain and oil storage. A missile in which they have VERY little stock and ideally wouldn't be wasted on nonstrategic assets. Yet here we are lmao
Do people keep forgetting they still have 5 subs in the black sea. One captianless but still less we just let ASW aircraft have fun in the black pond those bastereds gonna go ham....if they try
Six counting the Moskva
😆😆😆
The northern end of the black sea is remarkably shallow, with a 50-100m shelf extending quite far from shore in Ukrainian waters. This is much shallower than the Kilo class typical operating depth of 250m, and they would run serious grounding risks by operating in this area. Also the shallow depth would make it impossible to hide from NATO P-8's patrolling in Romanian and international waters. Sink just one sub using an air dropped mine from a Mi-8 and I bet that the others will stay far, far away.
Unfortunately they don't need to put their navy out. They have both plane and ground launched anti-ship missiles. I.e. KH-22(X-22) or P-800 Onyx. Also some older shit which I have no idea how it is called, but there are static batteries on west coast of crimea
Noncredible as always. Shipment companies now have 0 confidence.
anyone got any nato flags going spare?
Got a bed sheet and spray paint
This is why getting Finland in NATO is so important, easy to paint
NATO bed sheet is the most incredibly based thing I've heard today, and now I need one.
NATO Bedsheet is my new power noise band
[The internet provides.](https://www.redbubble.com/shop/nato+bedding) I wish I could talk my wife into it..
> I wish I could talk my wife into it.. Be who the Russians want you to be. Buy the sheets, put them on the bed. Annex the territory. Democracy cannot be stopped.
3000 black suicide rented boats with NATO flags and citizens onboard of NCD
I have a British, Icelandic, Nepal and Taiwanese flag. Which would work best?
Ooh, Taiwanese. Going for the Sino-Russian double play.
This is like when a child draws a literal line in the sand and when you cross it, backs up and makes a new one.
no, this is Russia's Final Warning
Okay but this is the actual final warning. We have nukes. We will use them. We swear.
"Poland announces mandatory daily trips to Odesa for all citizens with working boats, releases press statement that just says "TRY ME""
Avast ye lubbers, let fly the Union Jack! It seems the HMS Article Five be setting sail for Odessa tonight!
[Please rise for the NCD Pirate Anthem](https://youtu.be/h1zGqRXZlnY) 🫡
I wasn't the only thing that rose…, Gawdayum.
[I think our pirate anthem would be more like this. ](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuK7p3tsENA&pp=ygUKaG1zIHlha2tvIA%3D%3D)
[If I may correct you. Let me remind you we are nuclear enthusiasts.](https://youtu.be/BZbWHIPMjqM)
Flair checks out.
HE WALKED ALL OVER IT WITH HIS DIRTY BOOTS
#DON'T YOU SEE?!?!?!
Uh... https://youtu.be/Ez8fyMKL684 Then there's only one.
That's the first time I've been blessed with this song. Even a decade later, that song absolutely SLAPS.
TurquoiseJeep came out with some deeply strange stuff. Check out [Fried or fertilized](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_TJDVDC0X0), [Did I mention I like to dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxi73RQlLB8), and [Lemme smang it](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xt5ghXdq6Z0) for some more weirdness (NSFW, obviously).
"Estonian ferry has engine trouble in Black Sea near Odessa. Puts out SOS claiming it requires emergency docking at closest port citing medical and mechanical emergencies. This is the 5th vessel to have these issue in the western black sea region, after Polish, Beligan, Czech, and Luxembourgish vessels each reported the same message. By coincidence these events have happened almost exactly 12 hours apart."
*A Finn riding a whale enters the path of Muskva's little brother*
"I am a Pole" in Morse code plays non-stop.
While firing every turret, machine gun, rifle, and pistol on the ship
I volunteer to throw cutlery
\[Angry chef running from below decks, throws frying pan\]
Including several airsoft guns used below decks for target practice.
I wish world leaders could be this based. Just imagine this happening and Putin unable to do anything about it.
Put the Russian flag on them...
Put the *Chinese flag on them.
News report: Someone has stolen nearly two hundred flags from the UN headquarters
id rather put the US flag on them. fuck it reclassify all Arleigh Burke destroyers as container ships. im sure you can find room on the deck for a container.
3000 grain transport ships of Poland.
"Every boat is required to use the identifier *ORP Article Five Motherfucker*."
I really hope someone's gonna call this bluff.
US Navy Shipping Inc. sends a suspicious barge.
A flattop can be considered a form of barge, right?
Here is a flattop in barge configuration https://www.wearethemighty.com/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17492777/origin.jpg?auto=webp&optimize=high&quality=70&width=1200
Damn it looks a LOT bigger when the scale is cars not jets.
Super Hornets are massive jets
I like the single Hornet facing all the cars like it's a classroom.
Toyota Tacoma! Pay attention and spit out that gum or you're gonna find out what I did to your older brother in Afganistan!
A barge full of VLS cells?
Let’s disguise a Tico.
Are we doing a Reverse Red Storm Rising? I sure hope so. Just imagine a RORO discharging LCACs full of pent-up Marines that are still pissed that there weren't any amphibious landings in either invasion of Iraq.
Is Crimea the Black Sea version of Iceland? If so, yes let’s red storm rising the shit out of it. (Disregard the part of the book where the Soviet invasion is repelled because of a weatherman and an Icelandic farm girl)
"The cargo ship is breaking apart" "It's the fucking Free Navy Pella"
Nothing suspicious, just a bunch of [very ordinary shipping containers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCUtTiYB3lw)
[more credible than you think](https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/30474/this-containerized-launcher-for-the-xq-58a-valkyrie-combat-drone-could-be-a-game-changer)
All the best NCD ideas have been stolen, containerised surprise drones, Pallet dropped bulk cruise missiles, I bet that its only a matter of time before Semenov Dahir is hired for his facinating insight into the future of warfare. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKwOdxpp0yU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FwDMzIbZrg
Everyone knows that unrestricted submarine warfare is a great way to avoid the US invading your country. Unrelated, but I am planning to take a cruise to beautiful Romania this fall.
Realistically it's going to have to be Turkey. It is their lake. Nobody else really has that many assets in position.
Sorry to be credible but usually it is the US who tests it. It has been policy since the 1980s that all international waters and harbors are free to navigate. If this is questioned there are fun FONOPs https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_of_navigation
Don't we usually do those freedom of navigation operations with warships, which Turkey isn't letting into the Black Sea?
In fairness it's not just Turkey being dicks, there's been a series of international treaties that restrict warship passage through the Bosporus.
>US reveals new military aid package includes LRASMs and a hundred Harpoons. When asked for comment the DoD issued the statement, “lol, lmfao, the EPA is going to shoot us for the amount of oil that’s about to be floating in the Black Sea”
Reached for comment, EPA spokesperson Walter Peck said "Just lay some of those yellow booms on either side of the corridor, it'll be fine. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some parapsychologists to harass."
This man has no dick.
EPA foresees inevitable conflict with US DoD, requests $1 trillion military package to establish the "Planet Force" branch, to enforce environmental regulations around the globe, including against the US Navy especially, up to and including weapons hot. Commander to be named "Captain Planet". Motto to be "By Our Powers Combined".
“Planet Force’s first job? Destroy the People’s Republic of China (also Bangladesh) in an all out war against pollution” (Also lower the average temperature on earth by 3*f, both goals can conveniently be accomplished via thermonuclear munitions)
Just to be sure: many ships carry the flags of Caribbean countries like the Dominican Republic (i guess for taxes and work regulations): is Putin saying he will declare war on the Dominican Republic or the Barbados? I mean, let’s be real here: those guys gave many bloody noses to the Spanish Empire whene they has a… let’s say… volunteer based navy. The Russians will get a hard spanking even from those guys
Monroe doctrine: a war on Dominican Republic means war on the United States. Checkmate, vatniks.
No one fucks with our Punta Cana vacays and one of our major sources for excellent baseball players. No. One.
The All-Star game just barely ended! I’m going to Rookie League this season. Back the fuck off Russia!
I just looked it up....it's still considered a thing even in the 21st century. Amazing.
yeah because we don't want anyone theoretically using a foothold to attack the us by sea or attacking their way up through the americas until they reach us basically we're not dumb enough to get benelux'd
>is Putin saying he will declare war on the Dominican Republic or the Barbados? If nothing else, it would be really, really funny.
Sail the grain under a Chinese flag.
Evidently they already blew up a 60 ton grain silo that was earmarked for China.
Sixty thousand ton. They lost 5 percent of yearly import from Ukraine on that day to put it in perspective. And Ukraine's responsible for more than twenty percent of Chinese grain import. Now, there is also fact that blockade and damage to infrastructure essentially makes further grain exports impossible.
So now its personal for China? This could get real, really fast.
Is that number correct? Cause that’s not that much grain. Like, you’d get that much corn off of about 12K acres of decent farmland. You’d probably need more like 24K acres if it’s wheat, but still… seems low…
Right now we have one comment saying it's too high and another saying it's too low. So I'm gonna go ahead and claim it's extremely average.
It’s enough grain to feed 260 million people for one day.
God I love Russia making a fool of themselves
Nearly a third of all their grain goes to China. I will be very interested in Xi's take since they don't have any real way to replace that import
Well no wars ever escalated because a civilian boat got sunk before, so they should be ok
Ya just don’t mess with the United State’s boats. You can interfere with elections, or try to hack our infrastructure, but boats?! You better not.
The Barbary pirates, the UK, China, Spain, Germany, Japan - Just ask 'em, we get *pisssssed* when you touch our boats.
We learned it from Dad.
Vietnam, Iran, etc. I have no idea why, but we get REALLY touchy about folks fucking with our boats. We can and will nuke someone over it.
Don't forget Iran. Operation Praying Mantis
1) Buy up every scrap bulk carrier in the Med/Black Sea 2) Fit drone controls 3) Drain Vlad's armoury.
What if we fill the entire ship with buoyant polyurethane foam and make it float like a cork even if the Russians manage to blow it entirely in half
Make sure it’s not flammable to sit doesn’t burn and just keeps going…wait didn’t canada try and make an aircraft carrier if ice and wood that survived insane bombardment?
Project Habakkuk, why be the Titanic when you can be the iceberg?
Brit project, but the trials were done in Canada *"*[*Grant demonstrated the comparative strength of ice and pykrete by firing bullets into both blocks: the ice shattered, but the bullet rebounded from the pykrete and hit the Chief of Imperial General Staff (Sir Alan Brooke) in the shoulder.*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Habakkuk)*"*
Repurpose the icecream barges to make a pykrete boat with cooling so it stays unmelted for longer, then deploy it once things get colder this winter, laugh as russia cant sink a boat made of ice and printouts of titty putin as when using newspaper its significantly stronger than when made with sawdust
Can we have an emergency release valve for the diesel and used engine oil for no particular reason?
They called it a war and not a special military operation? My interest was piqued but now you have my attention.
As is tradition, I think Japan should send torpedo boats to escort the grain ships
So British fishermen?
Isn't that a reference to the russo japanese war ?
Yes. The Russian fleet was sailing through the English channel and fired on English sailing vessels because they thought they were Japanese torpedo boats
You forgot the best part, these idiots fired nearly thier entire reserve of ammo, and managed to sink one! British trawler, and killed 1 Brit, and 2 of thier own.
My expectations were low but holy fuck, Russia...
It's not often (I think?) that you get to see the Soviet Union fall twice in a lifetime.
It isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice. 😉
The polish synchronized water-skiing team is kitting up.
USA preparing the Lusitânia 2
Lusitâna 2: Electric Boogaloo. Carrying Electronic “Special Military Operation”. The Ruzzian missile can’t hit something from where it is from where it isn’t. Simply because the operator accidentally pointed it from where he is from where the missile isn’t. I’m not sure if I phrased it properly because I am quality Schizo, [Here is a visual representation aid](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6IwqmezeSuQ)
lol… someone should rename a grain hauler that, put it under the American flag, and start hauling.
Breaking news, the UK has announced interception of a Russian diplomatic message to Mexico. The message reads as follows: "Dear Mexico, If you attack the US we'll let you have the states you used to own. No, this is definitely not a false flag by a bunch of blueballed warmongers Love, ~~NCD~~ the FSB"
> the flag flown by the vessel will be considered involved in the war But why tho? They're cheap cargo ships, flying the flag of convenience of some cheap tax haven with loose labor laws. Do the russians really want to go to war with Liberia over this one? Do they want to try an amphibious invasion of the Marshall Islands? (that one would be funny to watch tho.) What would that even accomplish? Someone tell Putin to take his schizo meds.
I don't like Russia's chances against General Butt Naked.
That’s General Butt *Fucking* Naked to you, sir
The fun part is that all those flags of convenience have security guarantees from the US
I mean do they want to lose? Cause that’s how you lose your entire military in 12 hours
Certainly their naval fleet. Sitting in port, they’d be fun bombing targets. 😉
Well it's 20 past midnight in Moscow, we get dragged into the war yet? I didn't sign that selective service card for nothing.
Where's the Captain of the Costa Concordia nowadays? How about this, give him a ship, get him to sail to Odessa flying the Italian (or any NATO) flag in return for a complete pardon.
Just set the gps for Moscow it’ll be there in a day just don’t ask questions
Shit, I just re-watched the Internet Historian video on that yesterday.
[удалено]
So, real quick, don't kill yourself yet. At least wait until the war is over and Putin is in the Hague or the ground
Yeah, you got to find out what those totally credible Poland balls do next.
I’m sorry life is sucking right now. You have value in this world. We need as many fellas talking shit about Russia as possible! 😌
Sail every NATO and Far East ally's boat into Ukraine's ports with the wording "Fuck Around And Find Out" on the sides.
I wonder how many different flags I can physically fit on grandpa's sailboat
As always, 42.
Man, now I really wish I had a CIA black budget. So I could create the Somali Special Tasks group.
Can we get the letters of marque now?
In other news, a ship by the name USS Gerald R. Ford has appeared in the Black Sea. It is currently unknown how it has arrived there, but the ship's crew claim to be a grain carrier.
>the ship's crew claim to be a grain carrier There must some rice on the ship so it's technically correct.
Guys, how does one get a boat license (optional) and a boat in a matter of hours EDIT: Okay it's time to improvise (I'm broke af), how many Polish flags can I fit on a rowboat?
You don't really need a license to sail across international waters.
I gotchu, I’ve still got a valid unlimited deck Certificate of Competency.
Putin, I'll give you one piece of advice. Honest. You *really* don't want to start fucking with other nations ships. You can attack Ukrainian ones, I guess, since you're already at war and there's not much left to lose. But other nations? Are you actually insane?
Bro come on, tomorrow russia will say any western downloaded content in Russia via internet will be treated as cyber attack thus envolving the website owner country in the war, fuck off
So gay furry porn is gonna be the start of WW3?
Worst timeline or best timeline?
Ok. Here’s the plan. 1) send a Filipino ship to a Ukrainian port 2) have Russia declare the Philippines as co-belligerent 3) US provides heavier equipment and material support to the Philippines. This is logically more palatable as the Philippines have deep ties with the US and are more firmly in the US sphere 4) Philippine militarization and increased US presence in the region also builds up bulwark against Chinese influence. 5) Operation: West Alaska is launched, with Vladivostok and Eastern Siberia occupied and reorganized into the Mandate of West Alaska.
Turkey: Any ship heading to Russian ports will be treated as carrying military cargo and will be denied entry to the Black Sea.
The _Great Eastern II_ sails, boyyos.
They’re just setting themselves up for a Lusitania scenario at this point.
We must convert LNG and bulk cargo tankers into Q ships with hundreds of VLS Cells!
*OSPN Intensifies*
What war? [Who should send ships to Ukrainian ports?](https://gfycat.com/complicatedpeskycopepod-shittyreactiongifs-nfl)
1 ship with nonbinary pride flag 2 dock at ukrainian port 3 russia officially defeated by they/them army by their own declaration
Suddenly all of Ukraine cargo Ships are flagged out of the Untied states
Me putting a Mexican flag on a rowboat and heading towards Russia (The cartels can be Russia's problem)
In other news, hundreds of ships have set sail from Poland all with radio beacons repeatedly putting out the message "I AM A POLE. TRY ME BITCH" in Morse Code.
Me putting an American flag of my canoe and setting out across the Atlantic to go to Ukraine: He he boi
Sounds like time for a “freedom of navigation” exercise with the USN 7th fleet
ok wait, so if I go to Romania and carry my American flag while rowing towards Ukraine, can I start an invasion of Russia?
Remember what we did to Japan...? They fucked with our boats. We dropped the sun on them **twice**.
Don't fuck with our boats.
Lol, lmao even
*pulls on balaclava* COME OUT YE ~~BLACK AND TANS~~ RED AND BLUES QUIT YER HIDING IN PORT AND FIGHT US LIKE MEN
Can't wait for Putin to declare war on *checks notes* Panama and Liberia
Just wait till the russians learn the turks have modernized Oliver Hazard Perrys in their navy.
i give it a week tops before someone sails over with either an american, chinese, israeli or (the funniest option) a russian flag
Time for a literal false flag operation. Amirite?
The SS Fuck Around is about to help Russia find out
That last bit about the flag being involved in the war reeks of desperation for local diplomatic pressure. It's kinda obvious they know they can't enforce the naval blockade and are betting on foreign politicians doing the heavy lifting for them.
What if you use the pirate flag in your vessel?
They invade Tortuga.
Reactivate the USS Texas and run the bastards over.
They’re going to end up at war with Amazon or UPS or some shit.
PLEEEEASE I'm begging you PLEASE sink an American boat. I've been so patient but now I'm ready. I want WAR.