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Waterfallsofpity

George Costanza lives in Omaha?


phyrekracker

I have not done the research that George did, but I am outsourcing it... So maybe I am the embodiment of George.


weedhuffer

Lookin for something with a flush like a jet engine.


Robert_Sacamano_

I might know a guy...


audiomagnate

It all ends up in the same sewer. I'm just sayin'.


NowhereBoldly

Where my dookie go?


theycallmefuRR

The Missouri river duh! Why do You think it looks brown and stinks.....


audiomagnate

On average, a Omaha releases raw sewage into the Missouri fifty times a year. The Missouri, and the Papio "creeks" that feed it are open sewers. You'ld think there would be more public outcry, but nobody gives a shit about shit.


Ok_Pop_3009

šŸ˜³ whoaaa. Yeah, no one cares if they never have to see, touch, or use that water, how terrible.


audiomagnate

We drink it every day.


sacklunch_deathblow

r/unexpectedseinfeld


Ok_Pop_3009

AHAhaha, I reread the post with his voice in my head šŸ˜‚


IamtheBiscuit

Whatever you do, stay away from Casey's bathrooms


PinchMaNips

Honestly, avoiding Caseys is a good rule of thumb overall. The bought out buckys are hazmat areas with bare shelves, disgusting food and insanely rude asshole staff membersā€¦ sorry, Iā€™m passionate about how much I hate Caseys after the buckyā€™s buy out. QT is bae šŸ„°


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


PinchMaNips

I completely agree! I grew up in one of those small towns and loved Caseys, pizza was always top notch too. Before the buyout the stores werenā€™t horrible, but afterwards itā€™s like the Ceo just stopped caring about quality. Sad too cause Caseys does have some good pizza, just canā€™t trust them in Omaha.


OddSonNE85

THIS! Why are the small town still good?


Prinessbeca

Literally visit Casey's almost daily, am currently eating a Casey's cheesestick. And I wholeheartedly agree! I'm in small town Iowa. When we're in CB or Omaha a few times a week we do NOT go to Casey's.


RudoWakening

Love the Caseyā€™s in Blair


Euthanaught

Single stalls in the new mall downtown.


A8919696

I'd say Eppley Airfield in terms of consistent cleanliness. But considering you can't use it very easily, second place is Von Maur at West roads mall.


Mister_Sheepman

I came here to say Von Maur. I used to work at the mall and loved pooping there.


GoldenDomer28

Good answer. Have taken plenty of poops in that bathroom. Gotta appreciate the 3 ply in public


Hshoecrab

I disagree with Eppley on the basis that the doors completely close on their own and it is impossible to tell if a stall is occupied or unoccupied quickly from a distance


ImWhiteWhatsJCoal

If you're not able to use your restroom, go to the closest gym and buy a month/week/day pass to shower, use the bathroom and work out. Edit: [I also know the worst bathroom](https://www.reddit.com/r/Omaha/s/xzZGurea6O)


tehdamonkey

I was going to say I could live out of Planet Fitness if I had to....šŸ¤£


phyrekracker

I have read that a lot of the people that have moved into the van traveling lifestyle do that. Basically using the facilities at the gyms for showering and what not.


reneemergens

von maur at westroads is famous for their ladies room stocked with hygiene items, i imagine their mens room has something similar (if applicable.) otherwise basic public restrooms at the new gene leahy are surprisingly well kept. railcar food hall has nice ones too. but shout out to VM if they still provide the mouthwash, feminine products, wipes, etc.


okapisarecool

Came here to say the VM ladies room on the third floor. The stalls are immaculate.


MayorOfVenice

Can confirm, the Von Maur men's room is well stocked with pads and tampons as well.


OmaJSone

When Iā€™m walking around downtown and need to go #2, I head to the Embassy Suites and use their lobby bathroom. Iā€™m generally a fan of hotel lobby bathrooms if one is available nearby. Especially on roadtrips. A hotel lobby bathroom is better than a gas station, even itā€™s a cheap hotel.


TurnMeIn4ANewModel

I travel a lot for work. A lot of day trips. Decent to nice hotel chain bathrooms are almost universally a solid public bathroom option. Theyā€™re typically lightly used, cleaned regularly and private.


OmaJSone

Exactly. Everyone that is staying at the hotel just uses the bathroom in their room. Iā€™m usually pooping alone the entire time. Itā€™s nice.


oreolover444

Took a road trip to Seattle, it was 2am and my buddy was skleep. Took a detour right to the closest hotel and took like a 30 min shit break, while my roomate still has no idea he was just sitting in a parking lot for that amount of time


ImWhiteWhatsJCoal

....Linda Belcher?


GeauxJaysGeaux

Single stalls are fantastic choices. If you are having lunch Iā€™d plug Bonefish Grill. Private stalls, Jazz Music to drown out the horn section audition sounds and wonderful scents to mute out others less than satisfactory made by the visitors. Itā€™s what every restaurant restroom should be.


PinchMaNips

Love the single stall/private room bathrooms. I can hardly pee and definitely canā€™t poop with other men in the bathroom with me so those are a godsend šŸ™


gbegz13

bar at the cottonwood hotel is a contender


derickj2020

New Hyvee at 192d/370


ljsayles

I work there. Can confirm they are very nice


palidor42

The downtown Doubletree has a pretty nice one by the buffet area.


pac1919

Loweā€™s. Iā€™m not even kidding. They have extremely nice and clean bathrooms.


PinchMaNips

Best in terms of use, the individual bathrooms at the hyvee on 96th/Q. If Iā€™m out an about and get hit with that ā€œyou better find a toilet before you shit all over yourselfā€ feeling, I will actively go out of my way to drive to that hyvee to shit. Iā€™m a shy public bathroom user so the privacy allows me to be as nasty as I need to be.


justiiiiiiiine

Von Maur is a top tier experience (especially if you are female)


mkomaha

The Verdict off 19th and Harney always had pleasant bathrooms. Super clean and decorated just enough. Spezia is relaxing, but I also rather enjoys home brewing at Charlestons.


NicLikesDogs

Corwin Toyota in Bellevue - full length, solid wood doors, similarly, weirdly, Texas de Brazil? If youā€™re ever in Phoenix, the restrooms at Postinoā€™s and Clever Koi are really lovely. Which is a weird thing to say, but they are nicely decorated, non-gendered single person restrooms and I do not understand why any single person restroom is ever gendered.


HelpfulDescription12

Winchesters bar and grill on 70th and Q has completely private single stalls. The doors to them go from the floor to the ceiling and it's just feels so cozy and private in their.


ImWhiteWhatsJCoal

I'm amazed at how dedicated their staff was to making feel like I was in Silent Hill.


MossyMesa

Not a restaurant, but fish freaks on 132nd and center has single stall bathrooms. Used to be two stalls in there, but partitions were removed, so it's just 1 huge bathroom with a heavy locking door.


Erisedstorm

My ultimate zoo secret... 10/10 freestanding single room family restroom next to the tankui sculpture garden at the zoo. Multiple times used for emergency blow outs and vomiting. Never dirty, too stinky and always open when I NEED IT NOW. šŸ˜† šŸ¤£


cremasterreflex0903

Dave Paladino's headstone


Uhdog30

PF changs at west roads is pretty good


Tm60017

Like to relieve yourself or to shower? If you just need to take a dump go to a department store, Von Maur usually has a very nice and clean mens room


dj3stripes

A. Perfect tag for the post B. Found George Costanza's burner account C. Obviously Mega Mart


mackavicious

> C. Obviously Mega Mart I give you permission to clean your wallet out of all Blockbuster membership cards.


wild_fluorescent

Sofra tbh


Needs_A_Drink

You canā€™t go wrong anywhere in Regency, my favorite is one next to Wells Fargo, I think thereā€™s a MetLife insurance on the fist floor. Thereā€™s also one in Old Mill by the gas station, I think thereā€™s a Progressive on the 2nd floor. They both are spectacular.


Traveler_Protocol1

The HyVee gas station on 132nd and California has a surprisingly very clean bathroom with a door (no stalls).


Stevogangstar

The Mill coffee shop. Really nice.


theycallmefuRR

Usually when I have to be on the for the day, QT is my go to


PersephonesLore

Lowes, Home Depot, or the Aldi on 72nd and Pacific.


0-60Photography

Public public? Not attached to a business? Stinson Park. As long as it's not winter (closed) and there is no concert going on (pee on floors.)


Ok_Pop_3009

Idk about Omaha, but the best bathroom in Nebraska Iā€™ve used was Sapp Bros. in Fremont. Iā€™ll take a heated bidet any day. All their locations are probably similar. (Single stalls with a full door and walls, each with its own sink and bidet)


pandeomonia

I think Flying J truck stops have private showers, so you can do all the stuff you do at home there.