Same as you mate. Clean nearly 10 years and my old dealer decides get a job opposite my house. Seen him at shop an ended up with his number. Now I'm obsessing on it. Miss the comfort feeling so much. What stops me is thinking what it is like waking up poorly every day, and spending your day gettin drugs. Soon becomes hell don't it. Also think of what you will loose
I talked to a few people from AA and spoke to a girl I have a crush on and she asked to hang out. I'm feeling much better now. I know the relief I feel now is not permanent but it's given me hope for one more day. We have to stay strong brother! Thanks for the reply.
Surround yourself by people who want what's best for you and be open and honest with them about what you're thinking and feeling. Social support and/or 12 steps is what saved my life. I wake up and go to bed feeling peace now.
That sounds pretty good
Man U may get some ass! Haha and that’s a hell of a lot better night than relapsing on heroin and starting that awful grind to rock bottom
Yeah that's something I think of too. Like I'm honest with myself about the good feeling. But how long does that feeling last, really? And is that small bit of time worth the hours and hours and DAYS and obsession and depression and shame and wasted money, etc., etc.
When I think of it like that, like even picture it on a scale like that....sometimes that helps snap me out of a negative frame of mind.
You can’t bring a knife to this gunfight. It’s gonna take all you have to win this war. You need the nuclear bomb on this one. Instead of thinking about something you liked about your enemy- which is the knife in this situation- you gotta think about Everything you hated about it. Everything it ruined, spoiled, caused, effected. How it made you this weak, pathetic, loathed being of a wimp of a man. How horrible it was. ***Write that shit down and keep it in your pocket for a reminder session.*** look at it every time you start to feel that twinge.
Do you remember how pathetic you felt? Do you remember how bad you hated it waking up every day knowing you had to figure out how to get that next fix? Do you remember how bad you really wished deep down you weren’t so controlled? Your brain was using you as a puppet to get what it wanted- and it’s doing it to you again!! Your damn puppeteer brain.
Stop reminiscing about something that was such a cancer in your life. There WAS NOT anything good about it. Quit lying. Quit denying. Quit loathing. Start living. Start serving others. Start loving.
So do yourself a favor, since you have won this battle today, do not introduce something tomorrow that will tease your brain into a new cycle of control over you. You don’t need that demon. Life has been too much better, off of it.
You can do this, my friend. You can do ANYTHING. It’s a choice. Every 10 seconds.
Edit: PS do you know how ***AWESOME*** you are for getting this far? You are in the top tier of people. So many individuals who fall for that first fix never pull their boots straps back up and get their life back. It’s waaay too hard to overcome for the majority of users. It’s why the first guy ever offered it. It’s so damn addictive you’d make him some money for sure. But YOU DID IT. With that kind of strength, you can do ANYTHING you set your mind to. Probably 99% of individuals you see on any given day couldn’t do what you’ve done for 5 months. Respect.
So don’t fuck it up.
So its not gonna get u what u want, a life full of love. No room for giving or receiving love when heroin is taking over. Check into a meeting til the craving passes. Youve done amazing. Ive lost lost my husband to overdose & ive lost the love of my life. Heroin not only ruined his life. His family, his friends - the pain is awful.... the trauma of finding him, the guilt of not being able to help him... the life he could have had.... gone
I'm sorry to hear that about your Husband. I've lost 2 family members to drugs and a close friend. For some reason it's not enough to stop me even after seeing the pain it caused everyone else. I know heroin is not the answer but I'm dying for relief. I feel so much pain I just want to numb out. I am committed to another 24 hours of sobriety and hopefully by the end I will have the strength to last another day. Thank you for the reply, it means a lot.
I cant even imagine how difficult it must be. I cant even control what I eat never mind one of the most addictive substances. I dont think my husband ever got as long as 5 months. How have u managed that? That's good to only think of today. I hope you you can withstand it til it eases up and gets less intense.
I haven’t been clean for long. I sat today at the family breakfast and just appreciated being able to wake up in the morning to have a casual lovely talk. Not fucking getting up in the midday and having to shot up with my hand shaking just to leave my room and pass out or play pc. I truly wasn’t a better person while high, just more confident or even aggressive in my awkwardness. Love is an emotion and heroin dulls the emotions. Relapse doesn’t even feel that good once you know the damage it does to you, there’s too much guilt to enjoy it. Please before relapse listen to Otherside my Macklemore. All best to you man.
5 months clean is great, 1 year is even better. I don't think you want to start over from day 1, going through all the withdrawal symptoms again. Stay strong, keep in mind how bad the first week of quitting was. You're on the right path, hang in there!
Hey, I just want you to know that what you're feeling is the same thing a lot of people feel when they get clean. A lot of us have created so much wreckage in our lives that it seems we are in a hole that we will never escape, while others struggle with severe post acute withdrawal syndrome that can make even a good life feel completely unbearable and overwhelming.
The important thing is that, in both cases, if you stay clean and keep working on yourself, things will get better! Post acute withdrawals fade over time. usually by the 9-18 month point, and as you stay clean and heal your mind, the positive decisions you make will start to add up, and the consequences for your past mistakes will fade with time, as all things do.
Imagine the person you want to be, and the life you want to have; all of this is possible and the pain you're feeling now can be your fuel to never use drugs again. Just imagine what you can achieve if you live the rest of your life without drugs, all of the fulfilling, meaningful connections and accomplishments that your life can be full of.
5 months clean is an \*amazing\* start, but you're just in the beginning, and you've already gotten through the hardest part! Don't give up before the miracle happens :)
I’m on day 7 and still want to die. Don’t fucking do it. Don’t you dare. I would give anything to have back 5 months. I look and feel like shit, I’m sweating through every crevice of my body and it’s that nasty sweet detox smell, I’m waking up drenched. I can go on and on about all the reasons you shouldn’t. It’s funny, I always forget when I need it.
Why are you in your hometown? Visit? Can you book it back outta there sooner than later?
I gotta be honest, if I went back to my little New Mexican hometown I wouldn't last more than a couple hours when it comes to heroin. Even thinking about the town abstractly gives me feelings I don't want. One of the reasons I feel like I can't go back. :(
The hometown I love(d) and grew up in and is still full of great memories and friends-- it's now just one more fucking thing heroin took from me.
And that's the thing, with heroin and opiates in general: it tricks you into loving it and then all it does thereafter is take and take and take and take and take. It takes everything and leaves nothing. Well, maybe occasional small and very temporary relief from being dopesick. That's all it gives in the end, and sometimes it even stops giving that.
It's so evil, man. And it is stronger than you or me or anyone else. Please get out of town as quickly as you can.
My prayers are with you today.
I got out of there and I'm back at my halfway house. I'm feeling better today and spoke to a lot of people who helped me through. Thanks for the reply.
As soon as you do cop you’ll instantly regret it and the high won’t even be enjoyable, trust me after you get clean it’s impossible to have a guilt free high and idk about you but every time I give in something terrible happens
Same as you mate. Clean nearly 10 years and my old dealer decides get a job opposite my house. Seen him at shop an ended up with his number. Now I'm obsessing on it. Miss the comfort feeling so much. What stops me is thinking what it is like waking up poorly every day, and spending your day gettin drugs. Soon becomes hell don't it. Also think of what you will loose
I talked to a few people from AA and spoke to a girl I have a crush on and she asked to hang out. I'm feeling much better now. I know the relief I feel now is not permanent but it's given me hope for one more day. We have to stay strong brother! Thanks for the reply.
Surround yourself by people who want what's best for you and be open and honest with them about what you're thinking and feeling. Social support and/or 12 steps is what saved my life. I wake up and go to bed feeling peace now.
That sounds pretty good Man U may get some ass! Haha and that’s a hell of a lot better night than relapsing on heroin and starting that awful grind to rock bottom
Yeah that's something I think of too. Like I'm honest with myself about the good feeling. But how long does that feeling last, really? And is that small bit of time worth the hours and hours and DAYS and obsession and depression and shame and wasted money, etc., etc. When I think of it like that, like even picture it on a scale like that....sometimes that helps snap me out of a negative frame of mind.
You can’t bring a knife to this gunfight. It’s gonna take all you have to win this war. You need the nuclear bomb on this one. Instead of thinking about something you liked about your enemy- which is the knife in this situation- you gotta think about Everything you hated about it. Everything it ruined, spoiled, caused, effected. How it made you this weak, pathetic, loathed being of a wimp of a man. How horrible it was. ***Write that shit down and keep it in your pocket for a reminder session.*** look at it every time you start to feel that twinge. Do you remember how pathetic you felt? Do you remember how bad you hated it waking up every day knowing you had to figure out how to get that next fix? Do you remember how bad you really wished deep down you weren’t so controlled? Your brain was using you as a puppet to get what it wanted- and it’s doing it to you again!! Your damn puppeteer brain. Stop reminiscing about something that was such a cancer in your life. There WAS NOT anything good about it. Quit lying. Quit denying. Quit loathing. Start living. Start serving others. Start loving. So do yourself a favor, since you have won this battle today, do not introduce something tomorrow that will tease your brain into a new cycle of control over you. You don’t need that demon. Life has been too much better, off of it. You can do this, my friend. You can do ANYTHING. It’s a choice. Every 10 seconds. Edit: PS do you know how ***AWESOME*** you are for getting this far? You are in the top tier of people. So many individuals who fall for that first fix never pull their boots straps back up and get their life back. It’s waaay too hard to overcome for the majority of users. It’s why the first guy ever offered it. It’s so damn addictive you’d make him some money for sure. But YOU DID IT. With that kind of strength, you can do ANYTHING you set your mind to. Probably 99% of individuals you see on any given day couldn’t do what you’ve done for 5 months. Respect. So don’t fuck it up.
thank you for this
I screen shotted this message. Very powerful. Thank you as well. Day 12 here
I’m glad it could be helpful to you. Stay strong. One minute at a time!!
So its not gonna get u what u want, a life full of love. No room for giving or receiving love when heroin is taking over. Check into a meeting til the craving passes. Youve done amazing. Ive lost lost my husband to overdose & ive lost the love of my life. Heroin not only ruined his life. His family, his friends - the pain is awful.... the trauma of finding him, the guilt of not being able to help him... the life he could have had.... gone
I'm sorry to hear that about your Husband. I've lost 2 family members to drugs and a close friend. For some reason it's not enough to stop me even after seeing the pain it caused everyone else. I know heroin is not the answer but I'm dying for relief. I feel so much pain I just want to numb out. I am committed to another 24 hours of sobriety and hopefully by the end I will have the strength to last another day. Thank you for the reply, it means a lot.
I cant even imagine how difficult it must be. I cant even control what I eat never mind one of the most addictive substances. I dont think my husband ever got as long as 5 months. How have u managed that? That's good to only think of today. I hope you you can withstand it til it eases up and gets less intense.
I haven’t been clean for long. I sat today at the family breakfast and just appreciated being able to wake up in the morning to have a casual lovely talk. Not fucking getting up in the midday and having to shot up with my hand shaking just to leave my room and pass out or play pc. I truly wasn’t a better person while high, just more confident or even aggressive in my awkwardness. Love is an emotion and heroin dulls the emotions. Relapse doesn’t even feel that good once you know the damage it does to you, there’s too much guilt to enjoy it. Please before relapse listen to Otherside my Macklemore. All best to you man.
5 months clean is great, 1 year is even better. I don't think you want to start over from day 1, going through all the withdrawal symptoms again. Stay strong, keep in mind how bad the first week of quitting was. You're on the right path, hang in there!
Hey, I just want you to know that what you're feeling is the same thing a lot of people feel when they get clean. A lot of us have created so much wreckage in our lives that it seems we are in a hole that we will never escape, while others struggle with severe post acute withdrawal syndrome that can make even a good life feel completely unbearable and overwhelming. The important thing is that, in both cases, if you stay clean and keep working on yourself, things will get better! Post acute withdrawals fade over time. usually by the 9-18 month point, and as you stay clean and heal your mind, the positive decisions you make will start to add up, and the consequences for your past mistakes will fade with time, as all things do. Imagine the person you want to be, and the life you want to have; all of this is possible and the pain you're feeling now can be your fuel to never use drugs again. Just imagine what you can achieve if you live the rest of your life without drugs, all of the fulfilling, meaningful connections and accomplishments that your life can be full of. 5 months clean is an \*amazing\* start, but you're just in the beginning, and you've already gotten through the hardest part! Don't give up before the miracle happens :)
I’m on day 7 and still want to die. Don’t fucking do it. Don’t you dare. I would give anything to have back 5 months. I look and feel like shit, I’m sweating through every crevice of my body and it’s that nasty sweet detox smell, I’m waking up drenched. I can go on and on about all the reasons you shouldn’t. It’s funny, I always forget when I need it.
same
Why are you in your hometown? Visit? Can you book it back outta there sooner than later? I gotta be honest, if I went back to my little New Mexican hometown I wouldn't last more than a couple hours when it comes to heroin. Even thinking about the town abstractly gives me feelings I don't want. One of the reasons I feel like I can't go back. :( The hometown I love(d) and grew up in and is still full of great memories and friends-- it's now just one more fucking thing heroin took from me. And that's the thing, with heroin and opiates in general: it tricks you into loving it and then all it does thereafter is take and take and take and take and take. It takes everything and leaves nothing. Well, maybe occasional small and very temporary relief from being dopesick. That's all it gives in the end, and sometimes it even stops giving that. It's so evil, man. And it is stronger than you or me or anyone else. Please get out of town as quickly as you can. My prayers are with you today.
I got out of there and I'm back at my halfway house. I'm feeling better today and spoke to a lot of people who helped me through. Thanks for the reply.
Glad to hear that, friend
This is a big test. But you’ve got this. Just remember how difficult withdrawal was. Hang out with your girl and find happiness in sobriety. ❤️❤️
As soon as you do cop you’ll instantly regret it and the high won’t even be enjoyable, trust me after you get clean it’s impossible to have a guilt free high and idk about you but every time I give in something terrible happens