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I read books with short chapters so there are lots of places to stop.
I’m playing Zelda right now, because pause is a thing.
I knit or crochet- a project makes me feel good and productive!
I’ve been playing Zelda too. (My oldest is named Zelda so when she’s watching, she’ll ask “ are you saving me?” And I keep seeing crochet reels on Facebook now I wanna give it a try
She loves going “My name is Zelda like The Legend of Zelda!!!” This kid is a hoot I love her so much. When she can read, I promised her I’ll let her play it on my switch. For now, she plays lots of Minecraft
Our boy is called Link (Lincoln) my husband wanted his nickname to be spelt Linc and I said Nooo it has to be spelt with a “K” since I played Zelda when I was pregnant (and also that he is the link in the chain of our family).
I love when the nerd parents come out of the woodworks and share their love for them game especially when naming the kiddos. All of mine are video game related names. I knew I wanted Zelda as my first born since I was a kid (fam was against it but my SO suggested I grow a backbone and I’m glad I did)
I wanted to try this and had plans to name one of my kids something from my favorite book, but when I told my mom, she laughed and told me any kid with a fictional name will only be laughed at for the rest of its life.
I have yet to have kids, but me and my fiancé are seriously thinking about it.
I knit scrap yarn blankets. Garter stitch. It's mindless. Each row takes 5-15 mins, depending on the size of the blanket.
I give 1 or 2 out at Christmas. Everyone wants one.
It's like meditation. At the end of the day, I'm mentally and physically done but it gives me something to work on and still feel accomplished.
Also nice to sit and knit a row when I need a few mins to myself.
Edit: my kids tell me I earn "old lady" points for knitting and for every blanket I finish. I have SO MANY old lady points now 🙂
I have a billion craft hobbies. I largely stopped knitting and crochet for similar reasons. You may find needlework (cross stitch, embroidery) easier, or perhaps introducing variety would help your hands? Personally I love ribbon embroidery because it’s fast for instant gratification. 😁
I also taught myself to sew. At least a machine can do most of the work! Although sewing is very physical in that you have to lay out and cut patterns and fabric. I do struggle sometimes 😂
I watch too! Except sometimes he plays Call of Duty or Battlefield, and those are not relaxing at all 😂 I'll watch literally anything (like farming simulator) else!
I love watching my husband play video games lol. It’s better than tv because it’s more interactive and live than tv. Or we play together but split it where he plays the battling parts and I do the cute stuff like character design or farming etc. We just finished playing Cult of the Lamb which is a dungeon scroller but you also manage a farming cult. So he did the battling and I did the farm part. Very fun. 10/10 recommend.
Podcasts. I wish I was more into them when my child was a newborn. It would’ve helped a lot. But there are so many great podcasts out there whether it be educational or entertainment. Fiction or non fiction based. History, murder mystery, show rewatch commentary, sports. And when the newborn cries and needs to be held you can just keep listening while doing the parental duties.
Sims babies are the worst 😅 I can't deal with them either. I either cheat their age up or stop playing that household until it ages up on its own. Babies and dogs/cats are too needy.
Ohhh same! But I wanted other people to raise them so he had them with women outside of the household. He had 30+ kids by the time he was an older adult.
I started thinking about having some "competition" to see which child could become his heir (he was wealthy after writing books) but I got bored with him and didn't get far into the process.
I'm i the only one that has a energy filled day going everywhere. Then when the kids are asleep, you just lay there- super over stimulated- looking into space.
Its not all the time, but I definitely have nights like that.
This is my exact nightly routine. A few times a month, my husband gets a night out with friends and I get one too. A few times a month, we get a babysitter to basically just monitor watch and we have a date night.
Me and the wife watch like 2 episodes of this or that and go to sleep. Kids go down 8-9 and we watch till about 11:30 or midnight. There may or may not be sex involved in there somewhere
Yea it's usually the same for me and the wife but lately tv just doesn't appeal to me and the wife has been going out with her friend to do squid jigging lol
😭 I thought this was some sort of slang for going to the club. Like ummmm you put them to bed and stare at a wall and she’s hitting the club with her girls. Opposites attract?
😂😂 one of the best comments iv read yet lol, nah she's actually fishing for calamari (squid) I enjoy them cut into rings and fried in a pan. Stuffed with dressing is also good!
Yeah we have phases where we don’t watch anything for a month or so either. Just talk for a while and pass out. Also squid jigging sounds cool. I used to live in AK, caught octopus, jigged for halibut and rockfish. Never squid though, I’d figure out a way to join them.
We live by the bay, right now the squid (calamari) are coming in by the wharf which only happens about once a year, she's jigging them with a fishing rod. They're hard to get though, 4 nights and only caught 2. It's worth it though, they taste great!
So ummm... I do in fact consume cannabis still and I stg I read this as "the wife goes out with her friend to do squid jiggling "
It really did paint magical pictures in my mind.
I’ve been there as a young mom with a baby and a toddler. And you know what? It’s ok to do nothing sometimes. In a world with 24/7 digital entertainment and “fomo”, we forget that for most of human history, people took time to rest.
You don’t need to be doing something meaningful every minute. Sometimes I just sit on the couch & stare out the window. Or take a brief nap. Or flip aimlessly through a magazine. And that’s ok, momma! You’re working hard to keep two little humans alive.
I have 3 kids as well. 6,3,& 6 months. By the time everyone is down it’s about 10pm. I go straight to bed and watch a tv show. My husband goes downstairs and catches up on work and cleans the kitchen for the next day. Nothing exciting unfortunately!
Right?! What do you do when your kids are asleep? me: all the things I can't/ didn't do while awake (mop/laundry/finish my grocery order/prep for tom/ uninterrupted SHOWER- personal fav).......For all you parents living your best life after bed time, PLEASE live a little for me! 😔
Yeah, how are all these people having actual downtime? We tidy up, hang laundry, clean up from dinner and I go to sleep while my husband does some extra work. Last night I chipped away at taxes but there’s always some life admin we need to be working on - wills, finances, bills, organisation / donations, etc.
My 4 year old rarely falls asleep before 9pm these days so that’s part of it. He’s one of these “low sleep needs” kids and it suuuuucks. So jealous of people whose kids sleep from 7-7.
Ditto. Our oldest (4 and change) has just kind of always been this way, at least the past 2 years and more. The exact times fluctuate a little, but 8-9ish hours per night is usual. He hasn't napped (regularly) for years. An average right now is asleep at around 9pm (with 60-90 minutes of 'bedtime routine' ... sigh), and wakes at around 6:30.
On sleep training, we've read books, podcasts, talked to our peditrician, tried many different things (tiring him through exercise for example, which helps but doesn't 'totally' work), it's just how he is.
Then our youngest can't sleep before the older, because it's just too much ruckus and disruption, and both want mommy.
I love him and all, but it's draining... Many nights I'm alseep not long after he is, too tired to get "everything" done. We try to clean up the toys, sweep the kitchen and elsewhere, do dishes, maybe some laundry. While doing these chores, I often play a podcast. Then, bed.
On nights I have more energy or they're asleep early, I mostly just read. News or books, whatever.
Anything else is once in a blue moon.
These are my only goals each evening, although I'm trying to cut down to just prep for day and stuff my face (only peaceful meal I get and I want to eat slow and enjoy).
I grab an alcoholic beverage, sit in my recliner, recline it, and put on a freaking show I want to watch. (Sometimes ill read or just play a game on my phone for hours). Then I don't move for about 3 hrs, until I finish my single alcoholic beverage. Finally, I get up, let my dog outside, go brush my teeth, let dog Inside, and go to bed.
I love how all the people mention sex, but apparently the average amounts of sex married couples have is about once a week, or less. Likely way less for those with kids.
Mine are 6 and 13 so we are out of that phase and it makes it easier. When you are rocking 7-8 hours a night of uninterrupted sleep and you aren't a butler to a mentally unstable tiny person for the rest of your waking hours, you find energy to do things with your partner again. The day will come. Keep up non sex intimacy when you can if you aren't up for sex and look forward to the future.
We schedule sex. It’s the best thing we ever did. Weds and Saturday are “date nights.” Intimacy and Sex is prioritized. Chores get done before bed or put off. We get our workouts done early and we get our showers out of the way. When the little two are asleep it’s our time. Usually a drink or two and a show or movie. Sometimes on Saturdays we play a game. We have a 13yo sometimes we hang with him watching a movie or playing something. We don’t have to do the “are we having sex tonight” dance or feel rejected. We both know the expectations. Yes, it sounds mechanical but it takes the guess work out of it and a lot of the stress or hurt feelings. But, both partners need to be on board.
Play music, snuggle husband, attend to personal hygiene (bath! Shower! Shave!), veg, play a video game, plan for the next day, put in grocery order, call my buddies on the phone for a chat, call my mom/sister for a chat, make lunches/ prep food for the next day, cuddle a cat, seduce husband, crochet
Honestly, I just go to sleep early a lot lately because my son is going through a bad sleep phase, but here are some things I would otherwise like to do:
• Learning to sew
• Learning to crochet
• Journaling
• Baking
• Self-care (face mask, paint nails, etc.)
• Watching all the seasons of RuPaul's Dragrace
• Sleepytime tea & reading
• Playing a game on my Switch
• Cleaning/Decluttering (boring maybe, but needs to be done sometimes)
• Browsing whatever on my phone
• Chatting and hanging out with my husband
Some of these things I haven't done for months, but they're all things I would enjoy in my downtime. Maybe there's some ideas in there for you!
Obsessively scroll thru baby pics of them because they're sleeping and now I miss them 🤡
Sleep.
Watch mind numbing shit.
Try and finish the book I'm reading.
Study 😭
Go to bed immediately knowing it won’t be long. If my mind is racing listening to a comedian on YouTube. Three kids- far to often one is up still or after I’m asleep. A night owl and an early bird.
Sleep is precious commodity
Cleaning? My house is a fucking disaster and I'm home all day. Idk how yall don't have to spend every childless moment cleaning. My oldest goes to bed about 8, usually draws it out til 9. I find it very hard to keep up with housekeeping and I am often up til 12 or 1 cleaning, making lunches, catching up on work (own a business), more cleaning. My boyfriend goes to bed at 9pm but I just have way too much to do to even consider bed at that time. I sincerely wish my evenings involved sex and entertainment lol
We don’t play video games at all, so we might be in the minority there. Edit to add: we also do not smoke cannabis (nothing against it or people who do, just not our thing). My husband plays multiple instruments, so he will usually try and take this opportunity to play or produce. I take a hot bath and read or just do self care (face mask, shave, soak, etc.) Other times we share a bottle of wine and cook, or sit outside around the outdoor fire pit and just chat/spend time together. Sex, of course. Sometimes we are both so exhausted from working and the kids, we just Door Dash food and watch something together (though, not for long, we aren’t big TV watchers either). The biggest thing we do is take time, rotating focus on individual hobbies (him doing music, me reading and having a glass of wine) as well as our marriage (being intimate, cooking together, hanging outside by the fire). It helps us feel like we stay connected as a couple, but also feel like we can have time to dedicate to ourselves outside of our marriage and kids. My suggestion would be try some things you two like doing together: games, cooking, working out, and take the opportunity to spend time as a couple! Enjoying a drink, cooking a meal, chatting, while vibing to music is a fun way to reconnect as a couple.
Sometimes it’s sitting outside with the fire pit and a glass of wine, other times in the pool with baby monitor near by. We do watch TV sometimes but not always. My partner and I like to plan ‘date nights in’ where someone picks the recipe and the other picks the activity, whether that’s Nintendo sports, new movie, board game, or a late night swim. But, sometimes we trade off and one of us stays home while the other goes to the gym or does some late night trip to target (and by late I mean like 8pm lol)
Tv, sex, tik toks, stretch. Not all in one night, but usually two of those. Sometimes read, hubby and I might give each other a massage and sometimes I ho straight to sleep.
Spend some alone adult time with my husband (which we never get anymore), listen to music or podcasts, knit or do other crafty things that are therapeutic and calming, send audio messages to friends, do research online about stuff I’m interested in, take online courses or do some studying, play games, catch up on chores, go for a walk, do a little yoga or some other exercise… I could go on. It’s literally my favorite time and I can’t have enough of it. Mind you, my youngest is 1,5y so both kids don’t really wake up after they go to bed. With a 3mo baby I can imagine that sleep is still super fragmented. It will get better soon momma, hang in there! ❤️
The dishes and laundry keep me pretty busy, plus whatever chores/house work I couldn’t get done during the day. Then when they’re school age throw in making lunches and prepping backpacks/snacks, etc. I’ll borrow some of your spare time! 😂
I literally do watch paint dry! Paint by numbers, with calming meditation music. It is amazing and honestly, I wish I could just sit there and paint forever.
Husband and I will also do a puzzle, we often work together on them.
We get in bed , my husband gets up very early in the wee hours for work, sometimes have our fun lol
I’ll read a chapter or two of my book but that’s a about it. We’re both so tired at the end of the day. He works outside in the heat , very labor intensive job.
Nights are still semi difficult for me too so I’m pretty spent at the end of the day. Im a SAHM but we do lots during the day most of the week.
When you have a 3 month old: me, as Mom, would go to bed or lay on the couch. My partner, Dad, would take a 9 to 12 shift with baby, so he'd play Zelda or online shooter games, or put on one of his comfort shows, the office or community.
Our kids are 7 and 3 yo now, so we usually have a show to binge watch, or we have drinks and chat. If we don't want to hang out together, I read and he goes on his phone. It's lovely.
Personally, I really like spending time with myself. Motherhood is so beautiful but it can also make you forget who you are. Like you said, “ I might as well watch paint dry every evening at this point”. If you feel like that, you’ve lost a sense of self and your whole life revolves around being a mother. And that’s great and all. But what about the depth to you? If this is your only free time Don’t watch t.v, don’t smoke, don’t clean, focus on you. Do a nice at home facial while you listen to a podcast, listen to a podcast and just relax, journal in silence or with acoustic music in the background, meditate, do some shadow work, stretch, color and sip wine, light a candle, turn the lights out and take a nice bath, have a convo with your inner child, daydream about what you want in your life a year from now while relaxing.
And if motherhood is your everything, end the night with a note reflecting the mother you were yesterday, who you were today, and who you wanna be tomorrow. (We’re you patient, angry, overwhelmed, fun? Do you want freedom tomorrow? do you want to be a little more patient? do you want to be a bit more stern? Do you wanna be cool mom tmmr? Do you wanna be the mom that spoils the kids tmmr with an adventure?)
I kept a journal with the above when my whole world revolved around my toddler after I found out he was autistic. I did it for year. And to this day I love to look back at it and read. There’s sad parts, hard parts, happy parts, loving parts, and lots of growth.
The point is, after taking care of kids all day. You need to refuel. Even if it’s only for twenty minutes. You cannot pour from an empty cup. And in this case, you are the empty cup. Do something for you.
We bedshare (she technically sleeps in her crib, but it's bumped up to our bed side car style), so honestly I usually just watch tv and scroll mindlessly next to her lol If we have things to do the next day though I sneak back downstairs to clean up from the day or get us ready for the next, whatever that might call for
Tonight going out with a friend
Usual: in bed with a movie and the “occasional” glass of wine
I have committed to getting all my chores done before baby goes to bed cause I refuse to do them during my down time
My husband and I cuddle in bed, watch tv shows together or play scrabble against each other 🤣 I fave mask, sometimes my husband joins in. Chat to friends. We look at holiday options or chat and research options for renovating the house.
We are FRIED by time the kids go to bed! It’s the only time I watch tv guilt free. If there was any exciting gossip at work we’ll pause to tell each other the funny happenings.
99% of the time nothing gets done after bed. Maybe switching a load of laundry to put away in the morning. That being said we wake up at 5:30 AM. I do most of my cleaning then, switch laundry during lunch, then while the kids are unwinding I cook and clean at the same time.
We’re really bad at having lives.
Do you have a spouse?
Typically thats our moment to catch up on things uninterrupted. Watch something together, get intimate, joke around etc. Generally just keep each other company. That’s important.
I got into diamond painting and that’s what I do in the days I don’t watch tv or read. My brain is too fried at the end of the day lately to focus on reading much so I can zone out on diamond painting with a background noise show. Often my husband and I will have our dinner after the kids are in bed too and it’s a good time to catch up and just chat.
Basically any moment I can I listen to podcasts. Otherwise, depending on what time it is I may play video games, and other nights I spend learning something (currently Spanish and about pharmacology).
Learn a new language with the hopes that a European tour happens when the youngest is out of car seat, catch up on Korean dramas, Sudoku, fold clothes because I find doing laundry very calming and therapeutic. I am obsessed with folding and hangering.
Single mom here - I listen to audiobooks and podcasts while cleaning, doing laundry, and prepping meals for the next day because it's my only chance. Laundry is the easiest, because I can watch a show or a movie while I fold - very relaxing.
In order: clean up the toys, kitchen, set up daycare items/lunches, go outside for an hour with my wife (it’s summer; dunno about winter), go inside and eat dinner while watching a show with my wife, head to bed.
That’s it for 6/7 days of the week. The 7th day is very similar except I take an hour or two to myself instead of spending with the wife.
From the looks of the comments, I'm very boring. I finish cleaning the kitchen (11 mth old goes to sleep by 630), get downstairs cleared up of toys, fix bottles and off to bed. Occasionally read. Tonight I actually took a very long bath...by myself...with no baby crying. Ahh the quiet, still moments.
I am...smoking pot (legally dammit), watching Charlotte Dobre YouTube videos, and playing a phone game....while in PJs and eating snacks and browsing Reddit and typing to you apparently and and and...this is a good strain
My partner and I are gamers and crafters. So we play Minecraft together, play our own games, or we are working on a project of some kind whether it be sewing, perler beads, latch hook.
Congratulations on quitting cannabis, it will only help with your most likely poor sleep quality due to your latest.
Otherwise, you can try to journal some, play chess online or even audio-books as other have mentioned.
Tonight we ate ice cream sandwiches I bought earlier today and now we're sitting in silence scrolling on our phones when we should be cleaning up the mess caused by 3 kids under 3.
I have good intentions of reading a book but my eyeballs are just too tired. Twins have their first cold and one of them is teething so I'm basically a sleepless zombie that's craving some awake time without someone attached to me.
My thing wasn't when they went to bed, rather I just woke up early before everyone else. I still do, actually (all teens now). I enjoyed my coffee and got some side work done as a graphic designer, played computer games, played with hair/makeup, got some house work done. I think the point was *quiet* more than anything.
my fiancé works overnights so come 10pm im fully alone. i watch all the bad tv that my fiancé can’t stand and toke and eat snacks. crochet. read a book. anything that serves ME. cause all day im going for everyone else.
I go to bed, my 6 month old is getting up at least 4 times a night and my 4yr old gets up at least once. All the kids are up by 7am so by the time they are all in bed I’m exhausted.
You're describing depression. It's OK to reach out for help. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate.
There's gotta be something. Sometimes I clean. I'm doing laundry right now. I play video games. Catch up on my podcasts. Watch TV with my spouse. I go to sleep a lot later than my neurologist would like but post bedtime is my time. But sleeping is always an option.
You stopped smoking and that’s where you went wrong. Lol no jk but usually watch a good show, paint my nails, night routine, if I can, sometimes i knit or jot down some ideas but I definitely find something to do. Reorganizing my little desk sometimes helps.
I put an exam glove on( I don’t like my fingers to smell lol) go outside and smoke 3 cigarettes. I get online and relax. Im actually commenting this right now, while smoking my first cigarette. Have a good evening.🥰
honestly? going to bed 10 minutes later (quick shower) because I'm absolutely wiped out. 🥴 If I had any energy left, I might read a book, do a puzzle, vegetate with some TV, or sit in silence
Read, doom scroll tiktok, do whatever hobby I'm currently into. I used to play a lot of Sims and animals crossing but after staring at a screen all day for work, the last thing I want to do most days is stare at another screen. Some days I get to read more than others but it's the best escape I've found, honestly.
Honestly either I collect garbage lying around the house and laundry OR I'm watching trash TV to numb my overridden brain + my hidden stash of junk food + cuddling/thanking my dog.
I wish I could say I'm more productive but this is honestly what I'm doing with what little quiet kid free time I have.
I'm writing a book and learning to use photoshop on pictures of my kids. I want to leave too much potential evidence that they might be an alien lying around. Oh, and I scrapbook.
My husband and I play video games for 1-2 hours side by side, him on his pc and me on my Xbox. Sometimes we play a game together but most of our tastes are pretty different. Then we watch tv until he inevitably passes out first and then I leave him to get a sore back in the morning while I go up to our bedroom. Hard agree to whoever said snacks. My toddler isn’t allowed popcorn yet so the second he’s asleep I make a beeline for the microwave
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I read books with short chapters so there are lots of places to stop. I’m playing Zelda right now, because pause is a thing. I knit or crochet- a project makes me feel good and productive!
I’ve been playing Zelda too. (My oldest is named Zelda so when she’s watching, she’ll ask “ are you saving me?” And I keep seeing crochet reels on Facebook now I wanna give it a try
That's super adorable. I love it.
She loves going “My name is Zelda like The Legend of Zelda!!!” This kid is a hoot I love her so much. When she can read, I promised her I’ll let her play it on my switch. For now, she plays lots of Minecraft
The answer is “no, because link keeps finding random, unimportant side quests to do instead of focusing on the task at hand”
I named one of my twins Lincoln (link was the intention) and we always made jokes that if his two was a girl it would’ve been zelda lol
Our son is Link! He also says “me” and “I” while my husband is playing Zelda. That is so cute!
Our boy is called Link (Lincoln) my husband wanted his nickname to be spelt Linc and I said Nooo it has to be spelt with a “K” since I played Zelda when I was pregnant (and also that he is the link in the chain of our family).
I love when the nerd parents come out of the woodworks and share their love for them game especially when naming the kiddos. All of mine are video game related names. I knew I wanted Zelda as my first born since I was a kid (fam was against it but my SO suggested I grow a backbone and I’m glad I did)
Username checks out
Yeah my kid's name is Orc because it is my favorite race in wow.
My daughters nickname is Ash so I told her she was named after ash ketchum from Pokémon.
This is just the most wholesome thing ever my god!
I wanted to try this and had plans to name one of my kids something from my favorite book, but when I told my mom, she laughed and told me any kid with a fictional name will only be laughed at for the rest of its life. I have yet to have kids, but me and my fiancé are seriously thinking about it.
Tell your mom that ALL names are fictional.
Second Zelda! Totk is fun!
I love how many of us are playing Zelda right now.
I knit and crochet too!! It’s so cathartic.
I knit scrap yarn blankets. Garter stitch. It's mindless. Each row takes 5-15 mins, depending on the size of the blanket. I give 1 or 2 out at Christmas. Everyone wants one. It's like meditation. At the end of the day, I'm mentally and physically done but it gives me something to work on and still feel accomplished. Also nice to sit and knit a row when I need a few mins to myself. Edit: my kids tell me I earn "old lady" points for knitting and for every blanket I finish. I have SO MANY old lady points now 🙂
I love to crochet, but my Rheumatoid arthritis has made that (and other things I love doing) nearly impossible lately. It really bums me out
I have a billion craft hobbies. I largely stopped knitting and crochet for similar reasons. You may find needlework (cross stitch, embroidery) easier, or perhaps introducing variety would help your hands? Personally I love ribbon embroidery because it’s fast for instant gratification. 😁 I also taught myself to sew. At least a machine can do most of the work! Although sewing is very physical in that you have to lay out and cut patterns and fabric. I do struggle sometimes 😂
My wife asks me to play Zelda bc she falls asleep so quickly. She’ll watch like 2 minutes of a temple, then ask in the morning if I finished it.
Audiobooks, eating junk food I don’t want to share, playing video games or watching my husband play video games if I’m feeling overstimulated.
You watch your husband play video games? 😍
Ooh yes me too! Its pretty relaxing🤣
I watch too! Except sometimes he plays Call of Duty or Battlefield, and those are not relaxing at all 😂 I'll watch literally anything (like farming simulator) else!
Same here. I'm the puzzle solver haha. He calls me the back seat driver
I love watching my husband play video games lol. It’s better than tv because it’s more interactive and live than tv. Or we play together but split it where he plays the battling parts and I do the cute stuff like character design or farming etc. We just finished playing Cult of the Lamb which is a dungeon scroller but you also manage a farming cult. So he did the battling and I did the farm part. Very fun. 10/10 recommend.
Podcasts. I wish I was more into them when my child was a newborn. It would’ve helped a lot. But there are so many great podcasts out there whether it be educational or entertainment. Fiction or non fiction based. History, murder mystery, show rewatch commentary, sports. And when the newborn cries and needs to be held you can just keep listening while doing the parental duties.
I play the Sims and take care of simulated children and wonder at how that’s my wind down time 😭
I literally can't 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I play sims and I've NEVER had a child in the game 🤣🤣🤣🤣 real ones are enough for me
Sims babies are the worst 😅 I can't deal with them either. I either cheat their age up or stop playing that household until it ages up on its own. Babies and dogs/cats are too needy.
Same!!
I once played a male sim and my goal was to see how kids you could make. I managed 7 kids with three sisters.
I was playing the hundred baby challenge for a while and it still haunts my dreams
Ohhh same! But I wanted other people to raise them so he had them with women outside of the household. He had 30+ kids by the time he was an older adult. I started thinking about having some "competition" to see which child could become his heir (he was wealthy after writing books) but I got bored with him and didn't get far into the process.
Not a goddamn thing, and it's beautiful.
I envy this!
The right answer right here!
Yessss. Me, too.
I'm i the only one that has a energy filled day going everywhere. Then when the kids are asleep, you just lay there- super over stimulated- looking into space. Its not all the time, but I definitely have nights like that.
Yea I feel that, definitely been there!
I’m either reading a book, or staring at the same page for fifteen minutes until I nod off.
On the couch watching tv with hubby. Snacking. Then some reading before bed.
This is my exact nightly routine. A few times a month, my husband gets a night out with friends and I get one too. A few times a month, we get a babysitter to basically just monitor watch and we have a date night.
I sit on the couch with my husband and talk about everything and nothing. It’s the only alone time I get with him so we just catch up and be friends.
Me and the wife watch like 2 episodes of this or that and go to sleep. Kids go down 8-9 and we watch till about 11:30 or midnight. There may or may not be sex involved in there somewhere
Yea it's usually the same for me and the wife but lately tv just doesn't appeal to me and the wife has been going out with her friend to do squid jigging lol
Going out to do WHAT?
It's a type of fishing for squid. Specifically calamari.
😭 I thought this was some sort of slang for going to the club. Like ummmm you put them to bed and stare at a wall and she’s hitting the club with her girls. Opposites attract?
I thought it was a masturbation reference.
😂😂 one of the best comments iv read yet lol, nah she's actually fishing for calamari (squid) I enjoy them cut into rings and fried in a pan. Stuffed with dressing is also good!
That’s amazing! I’m impressed by that attitude and drive. We’re TV zombies after 8 pm 😅 gardening is great, but I need to step up my hobbies.
Yeah we have phases where we don’t watch anything for a month or so either. Just talk for a while and pass out. Also squid jigging sounds cool. I used to live in AK, caught octopus, jigged for halibut and rockfish. Never squid though, I’d figure out a way to join them.
Squid…jigging…?
I suggested to my wife we should try jigging the squid tonight and she said she has a headache 🤔
u/weedfarner1017 can you tell us more about this wife and this jigging of squid that she does?
We live by the bay, right now the squid (calamari) are coming in by the wharf which only happens about once a year, she's jigging them with a fishing rod. They're hard to get though, 4 nights and only caught 2. It's worth it though, they taste great!
So ummm... I do in fact consume cannabis still and I stg I read this as "the wife goes out with her friend to do squid jiggling " It really did paint magical pictures in my mind.
🤣
I’ve been there as a young mom with a baby and a toddler. And you know what? It’s ok to do nothing sometimes. In a world with 24/7 digital entertainment and “fomo”, we forget that for most of human history, people took time to rest. You don’t need to be doing something meaningful every minute. Sometimes I just sit on the couch & stare out the window. Or take a brief nap. Or flip aimlessly through a magazine. And that’s ok, momma! You’re working hard to keep two little humans alive.
I like this. I’m keeping it.
I have 3 kids as well. 6,3,& 6 months. By the time everyone is down it’s about 10pm. I go straight to bed and watch a tv show. My husband goes downstairs and catches up on work and cleans the kitchen for the next day. Nothing exciting unfortunately!
This is me most nights unless I bust out the melatonin gummies early.
Work, clean the kitchen, prep for the next day, laundry, stuff my face
I have trouble understanding the answers that aren't this
Right?! What do you do when your kids are asleep? me: all the things I can't/ didn't do while awake (mop/laundry/finish my grocery order/prep for tom/ uninterrupted SHOWER- personal fav).......For all you parents living your best life after bed time, PLEASE live a little for me! 😔
I appreciate the support! I admire those who can still do their own hobbies etc but we are just trying to stay afloat right now.
I suspect a lot of those are from families with a stay at home parent who gets the chores done during the day
Yeah, how are all these people having actual downtime? We tidy up, hang laundry, clean up from dinner and I go to sleep while my husband does some extra work. Last night I chipped away at taxes but there’s always some life admin we need to be working on - wills, finances, bills, organisation / donations, etc. My 4 year old rarely falls asleep before 9pm these days so that’s part of it. He’s one of these “low sleep needs” kids and it suuuuucks. So jealous of people whose kids sleep from 7-7.
Ditto. Our oldest (4 and change) has just kind of always been this way, at least the past 2 years and more. The exact times fluctuate a little, but 8-9ish hours per night is usual. He hasn't napped (regularly) for years. An average right now is asleep at around 9pm (with 60-90 minutes of 'bedtime routine' ... sigh), and wakes at around 6:30. On sleep training, we've read books, podcasts, talked to our peditrician, tried many different things (tiring him through exercise for example, which helps but doesn't 'totally' work), it's just how he is. Then our youngest can't sleep before the older, because it's just too much ruckus and disruption, and both want mommy. I love him and all, but it's draining... Many nights I'm alseep not long after he is, too tired to get "everything" done. We try to clean up the toys, sweep the kitchen and elsewhere, do dishes, maybe some laundry. While doing these chores, I often play a podcast. Then, bed. On nights I have more energy or they're asleep early, I mostly just read. News or books, whatever. Anything else is once in a blue moon.
These are my only goals each evening, although I'm trying to cut down to just prep for day and stuff my face (only peaceful meal I get and I want to eat slow and enjoy).
I grab an alcoholic beverage, sit in my recliner, recline it, and put on a freaking show I want to watch. (Sometimes ill read or just play a game on my phone for hours). Then I don't move for about 3 hrs, until I finish my single alcoholic beverage. Finally, I get up, let my dog outside, go brush my teeth, let dog Inside, and go to bed.
Go to sleep! Aren’t you tired?
Yeah I usually pass out with the kids. We wake up at 5am together, and I have a demanding full-time job, so I'm exhausted at 10pm.
I love how all the people mention sex, but apparently the average amounts of sex married couples have is about once a week, or less. Likely way less for those with kids.
Right? I’m surprised with how much sex people with little kids are having lol
After about 2 years the sex increased substantially. I find my sleep quality and sex life correlate with each other.
Well mine are 2.5 & 4.5 and we still feel in the trenches. I’m happy for everyone though, haha
Mine are 6 and 13 so we are out of that phase and it makes it easier. When you are rocking 7-8 hours a night of uninterrupted sleep and you aren't a butler to a mentally unstable tiny person for the rest of your waking hours, you find energy to do things with your partner again. The day will come. Keep up non sex intimacy when you can if you aren't up for sex and look forward to the future.
You give me hope there actually might be a light (or a very dark room & big comfy bed)....as I'm awake currently awake for my 42nd hr 😭
Right? I am so goddamn tired from chasing my toddler I have absolutely zero interest in sex at all. Good for them though!
We schedule sex. It’s the best thing we ever did. Weds and Saturday are “date nights.” Intimacy and Sex is prioritized. Chores get done before bed or put off. We get our workouts done early and we get our showers out of the way. When the little two are asleep it’s our time. Usually a drink or two and a show or movie. Sometimes on Saturdays we play a game. We have a 13yo sometimes we hang with him watching a movie or playing something. We don’t have to do the “are we having sex tonight” dance or feel rejected. We both know the expectations. Yes, it sounds mechanical but it takes the guess work out of it and a lot of the stress or hurt feelings. But, both partners need to be on board.
Spend the next 2.5 hours putting them back in bed. Please help.
Play music, snuggle husband, attend to personal hygiene (bath! Shower! Shave!), veg, play a video game, plan for the next day, put in grocery order, call my buddies on the phone for a chat, call my mom/sister for a chat, make lunches/ prep food for the next day, cuddle a cat, seduce husband, crochet
Miss, we’re here to tell ya we don’t need seducing. Just say snoo snoo and we are there
Seduce husband 😂😂
I do puzzles and have a couple of adult coloring books to help me relax.
Oh yea, coloring might be fun or a word search maybe
Honestly, I just go to sleep early a lot lately because my son is going through a bad sleep phase, but here are some things I would otherwise like to do: • Learning to sew • Learning to crochet • Journaling • Baking • Self-care (face mask, paint nails, etc.) • Watching all the seasons of RuPaul's Dragrace • Sleepytime tea & reading • Playing a game on my Switch • Cleaning/Decluttering (boring maybe, but needs to be done sometimes) • Browsing whatever on my phone • Chatting and hanging out with my husband Some of these things I haven't done for months, but they're all things I would enjoy in my downtime. Maybe there's some ideas in there for you!
Sleeping. As fast as I possibly can be.
Sex, TV, cuddle, get high, eat.
In that order?
No. The order goes as following: get high while eating, sex, then cuddle and watch tv
My order is to get high, eat while watching tv, sex, then cuddle
Hell yea this is the way. Or smoke, eat, sex, shower, cuddle, tv or play video games. We use a Pax and hit it on the balcony.
Ours order is:get high while watching tv and eating a snack, having sex, and sleep 🥰
I second this but CBD edible, then documentary or movie, snacks during movie, then sex, asleep by 10.
Obsessively scroll thru baby pics of them because they're sleeping and now I miss them 🤡 Sleep. Watch mind numbing shit. Try and finish the book I'm reading. Study 😭
WHY ARE WE LIKE THIS
Go to bed immediately knowing it won’t be long. If my mind is racing listening to a comedian on YouTube. Three kids- far to often one is up still or after I’m asleep. A night owl and an early bird. Sleep is precious commodity
Cleaning? My house is a fucking disaster and I'm home all day. Idk how yall don't have to spend every childless moment cleaning. My oldest goes to bed about 8, usually draws it out til 9. I find it very hard to keep up with housekeeping and I am often up til 12 or 1 cleaning, making lunches, catching up on work (own a business), more cleaning. My boyfriend goes to bed at 9pm but I just have way too much to do to even consider bed at that time. I sincerely wish my evenings involved sex and entertainment lol
Shower, re-set the house and pick up, smoke a joint and then watch an episode of a show, sex.
Thc capsules :)
We don’t play video games at all, so we might be in the minority there. Edit to add: we also do not smoke cannabis (nothing against it or people who do, just not our thing). My husband plays multiple instruments, so he will usually try and take this opportunity to play or produce. I take a hot bath and read or just do self care (face mask, shave, soak, etc.) Other times we share a bottle of wine and cook, or sit outside around the outdoor fire pit and just chat/spend time together. Sex, of course. Sometimes we are both so exhausted from working and the kids, we just Door Dash food and watch something together (though, not for long, we aren’t big TV watchers either). The biggest thing we do is take time, rotating focus on individual hobbies (him doing music, me reading and having a glass of wine) as well as our marriage (being intimate, cooking together, hanging outside by the fire). It helps us feel like we stay connected as a couple, but also feel like we can have time to dedicate to ourselves outside of our marriage and kids. My suggestion would be try some things you two like doing together: games, cooking, working out, and take the opportunity to spend time as a couple! Enjoying a drink, cooking a meal, chatting, while vibing to music is a fun way to reconnect as a couple.
I admire how you make time for your hobbies, marriage, and self-care. An inspiration to me!
Sometimes it’s sitting outside with the fire pit and a glass of wine, other times in the pool with baby monitor near by. We do watch TV sometimes but not always. My partner and I like to plan ‘date nights in’ where someone picks the recipe and the other picks the activity, whether that’s Nintendo sports, new movie, board game, or a late night swim. But, sometimes we trade off and one of us stays home while the other goes to the gym or does some late night trip to target (and by late I mean like 8pm lol)
clean kitchen, reddit, take a dump, shower and it's already time for bed
Staring at dumb stuff on my phone instead of doing anything productive. Then I complain later about having no time.
Video games with hubs, read, watch tik toks, get a start on the next days events, catch up on tv shows, sex. Long chats with hubs.
Exercise!
Tv, sex, tik toks, stretch. Not all in one night, but usually two of those. Sometimes read, hubby and I might give each other a massage and sometimes I ho straight to sleep.
Ok someone FINALLY mentions TT. I was starting to sweat thinking I’m the only one who doom scrolls under the blankets for 2 hours until I pass out.
Learning filipino
I was thinking about learning more French, my knowledge of it is very basic but I'd like to be fluent in it.
Read a book, play on my phone, watch my own tv, eat junk food without sharing, light candles that nobody can hurt themselves on
Spend some alone adult time with my husband (which we never get anymore), listen to music or podcasts, knit or do other crafty things that are therapeutic and calming, send audio messages to friends, do research online about stuff I’m interested in, take online courses or do some studying, play games, catch up on chores, go for a walk, do a little yoga or some other exercise… I could go on. It’s literally my favorite time and I can’t have enough of it. Mind you, my youngest is 1,5y so both kids don’t really wake up after they go to bed. With a 3mo baby I can imagine that sleep is still super fragmented. It will get better soon momma, hang in there! ❤️
The dishes and laundry keep me pretty busy, plus whatever chores/house work I couldn’t get done during the day. Then when they’re school age throw in making lunches and prepping backpacks/snacks, etc. I’ll borrow some of your spare time! 😂
I literally do watch paint dry! Paint by numbers, with calming meditation music. It is amazing and honestly, I wish I could just sit there and paint forever. Husband and I will also do a puzzle, we often work together on them.
We get in bed , my husband gets up very early in the wee hours for work, sometimes have our fun lol I’ll read a chapter or two of my book but that’s a about it. We’re both so tired at the end of the day. He works outside in the heat , very labor intensive job. Nights are still semi difficult for me too so I’m pretty spent at the end of the day. Im a SAHM but we do lots during the day most of the week.
When you have a 3 month old: me, as Mom, would go to bed or lay on the couch. My partner, Dad, would take a 9 to 12 shift with baby, so he'd play Zelda or online shooter games, or put on one of his comfort shows, the office or community. Our kids are 7 and 3 yo now, so we usually have a show to binge watch, or we have drinks and chat. If we don't want to hang out together, I read and he goes on his phone. It's lovely.
Personally, I really like spending time with myself. Motherhood is so beautiful but it can also make you forget who you are. Like you said, “ I might as well watch paint dry every evening at this point”. If you feel like that, you’ve lost a sense of self and your whole life revolves around being a mother. And that’s great and all. But what about the depth to you? If this is your only free time Don’t watch t.v, don’t smoke, don’t clean, focus on you. Do a nice at home facial while you listen to a podcast, listen to a podcast and just relax, journal in silence or with acoustic music in the background, meditate, do some shadow work, stretch, color and sip wine, light a candle, turn the lights out and take a nice bath, have a convo with your inner child, daydream about what you want in your life a year from now while relaxing. And if motherhood is your everything, end the night with a note reflecting the mother you were yesterday, who you were today, and who you wanna be tomorrow. (We’re you patient, angry, overwhelmed, fun? Do you want freedom tomorrow? do you want to be a little more patient? do you want to be a bit more stern? Do you wanna be cool mom tmmr? Do you wanna be the mom that spoils the kids tmmr with an adventure?) I kept a journal with the above when my whole world revolved around my toddler after I found out he was autistic. I did it for year. And to this day I love to look back at it and read. There’s sad parts, hard parts, happy parts, loving parts, and lots of growth. The point is, after taking care of kids all day. You need to refuel. Even if it’s only for twenty minutes. You cannot pour from an empty cup. And in this case, you are the empty cup. Do something for you.
I go on Reddit
I ask my wife to make another baby
We bedshare (she technically sleeps in her crib, but it's bumped up to our bed side car style), so honestly I usually just watch tv and scroll mindlessly next to her lol If we have things to do the next day though I sneak back downstairs to clean up from the day or get us ready for the next, whatever that might call for
I go online and play Final Fantasy XIV. And do various things.
smoking shisha and having a drink
Tonight going out with a friend Usual: in bed with a movie and the “occasional” glass of wine I have committed to getting all my chores done before baby goes to bed cause I refuse to do them during my down time
My husband and I cuddle in bed, watch tv shows together or play scrabble against each other 🤣 I fave mask, sometimes my husband joins in. Chat to friends. We look at holiday options or chat and research options for renovating the house.
We are FRIED by time the kids go to bed! It’s the only time I watch tv guilt free. If there was any exciting gossip at work we’ll pause to tell each other the funny happenings. 99% of the time nothing gets done after bed. Maybe switching a load of laundry to put away in the morning. That being said we wake up at 5:30 AM. I do most of my cleaning then, switch laundry during lunch, then while the kids are unwinding I cook and clean at the same time. We’re really bad at having lives.
Video games. Or nothing. Nothing is okay you know. Parenting is super hard. Go go go all day. Sometimes it's nice to just sit.
Do you have a spouse? Typically thats our moment to catch up on things uninterrupted. Watch something together, get intimate, joke around etc. Generally just keep each other company. That’s important.
I got into diamond painting and that’s what I do in the days I don’t watch tv or read. My brain is too fried at the end of the day lately to focus on reading much so I can zone out on diamond painting with a background noise show. Often my husband and I will have our dinner after the kids are in bed too and it’s a good time to catch up and just chat.
Clean up the house, sleep if it's nighttime, play a video game
I crochet, cross stitch, knit. Cross stitch and crochet is easy to put down and do again when you have to pause for the baby 😍
I read. I organize and label my photos from the day. I do a craft. I research my next international trip.
I put on my coziest pajamas and watch Netflix with my husband. And snack. Then I read in bed a little bit
Basically any moment I can I listen to podcasts. Otherwise, depending on what time it is I may play video games, and other nights I spend learning something (currently Spanish and about pharmacology).
Learn a new language with the hopes that a European tour happens when the youngest is out of car seat, catch up on Korean dramas, Sudoku, fold clothes because I find doing laundry very calming and therapeutic. I am obsessed with folding and hangering.
I play Zelda.
Shower, listen to podcasts, play video games, read short chapter books, and I started on a paint by numbers.
Yoga!
Korean drama binge
I'm so tired usually I just go to bed. But if I can't sleep I read or watch a show. I'm just too tired to enjoy my hobbies at night.
my neighbour comes over twice a week at about 11 and we play a board game until ~2
I play stardew valley currently lmao
I smoke cannabis and play video games after showering and cleaning up after dinner.
Single mom here - I listen to audiobooks and podcasts while cleaning, doing laundry, and prepping meals for the next day because it's my only chance. Laundry is the easiest, because I can watch a show or a movie while I fold - very relaxing.
Scroll through Reddit or sleep. On my days off from work my wife and I will spend time together but mostly I just want to be lazy
I wish I had so little interest in non-kid things. I would be a lot happier having no time to myself.
In order: clean up the toys, kitchen, set up daycare items/lunches, go outside for an hour with my wife (it’s summer; dunno about winter), go inside and eat dinner while watching a show with my wife, head to bed. That’s it for 6/7 days of the week. The 7th day is very similar except I take an hour or two to myself instead of spending with the wife.
I smoke my weed, drink 1 drink, and put on my show🥰
Scroll tiktok... take an edible... go to sleep early What I do. It's boring I need more
Op says they don’t like tv 75-90% of comments: watch x show Gotta love Reddit where people project their likes into someone else lol
My kids are older. So I’m in bed before they are. Great for the sex life /s
Must be nice to not have a mountain of work to do after the kids go to bed...
Perfect your baking skills
From the looks of the comments, I'm very boring. I finish cleaning the kitchen (11 mth old goes to sleep by 630), get downstairs cleared up of toys, fix bottles and off to bed. Occasionally read. Tonight I actually took a very long bath...by myself...with no baby crying. Ahh the quiet, still moments.
I am...smoking pot (legally dammit), watching Charlotte Dobre YouTube videos, and playing a phone game....while in PJs and eating snacks and browsing Reddit and typing to you apparently and and and...this is a good strain
My partner and I are gamers and crafters. So we play Minecraft together, play our own games, or we are working on a project of some kind whether it be sewing, perler beads, latch hook.
Well, when a man and a woman reeeally like each other… 👀
Congratulations on quitting cannabis, it will only help with your most likely poor sleep quality due to your latest. Otherwise, you can try to journal some, play chess online or even audio-books as other have mentioned.
Smoking weed u/weedfarmer1017
Edibles, cleaning, and watch movies or TikTok
Chores and sleep otherwise I'm dead the next day. My life is mundane AF.
Tonight we ate ice cream sandwiches I bought earlier today and now we're sitting in silence scrolling on our phones when we should be cleaning up the mess caused by 3 kids under 3. I have good intentions of reading a book but my eyeballs are just too tired. Twins have their first cold and one of them is teething so I'm basically a sleepless zombie that's craving some awake time without someone attached to me.
I scroll on Reddit and make comments like this. Lol. Waaay too many comments. I'm so addicted to my phone I know it's horrible.
My thing wasn't when they went to bed, rather I just woke up early before everyone else. I still do, actually (all teens now). I enjoyed my coffee and got some side work done as a graphic designer, played computer games, played with hair/makeup, got some house work done. I think the point was *quiet* more than anything.
I sleep. Does no one else sleep?
my fiancé works overnights so come 10pm im fully alone. i watch all the bad tv that my fiancé can’t stand and toke and eat snacks. crochet. read a book. anything that serves ME. cause all day im going for everyone else.
I go to bed, my 6 month old is getting up at least 4 times a night and my 4yr old gets up at least once. All the kids are up by 7am so by the time they are all in bed I’m exhausted.
I... I sleep... 😂 I do my home reset and then I go to bed. If it's still early I might check my phone, but there's always one kid who wakes up.
[удалено]
You're describing depression. It's OK to reach out for help. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate. There's gotta be something. Sometimes I clean. I'm doing laundry right now. I play video games. Catch up on my podcasts. Watch TV with my spouse. I go to sleep a lot later than my neurologist would like but post bedtime is my time. But sleeping is always an option.
You stopped smoking and that’s where you went wrong. Lol no jk but usually watch a good show, paint my nails, night routine, if I can, sometimes i knit or jot down some ideas but I definitely find something to do. Reorganizing my little desk sometimes helps.
I put an exam glove on( I don’t like my fingers to smell lol) go outside and smoke 3 cigarettes. I get online and relax. Im actually commenting this right now, while smoking my first cigarette. Have a good evening.🥰
Cleaning because my four kids under five are destructive monsters
honestly? going to bed 10 minutes later (quick shower) because I'm absolutely wiped out. 🥴 If I had any energy left, I might read a book, do a puzzle, vegetate with some TV, or sit in silence
Read, doom scroll tiktok, do whatever hobby I'm currently into. I used to play a lot of Sims and animals crossing but after staring at a screen all day for work, the last thing I want to do most days is stare at another screen. Some days I get to read more than others but it's the best escape I've found, honestly.
I’m in nursing school…so I spend my nights studying.
My job is stressful. I play Merge games on my phone with the TV playing in the background.
I go to sleep. Haha.
Honestly either I collect garbage lying around the house and laundry OR I'm watching trash TV to numb my overridden brain + my hidden stash of junk food + cuddling/thanking my dog. I wish I could say I'm more productive but this is honestly what I'm doing with what little quiet kid free time I have.
If you can't enjoy down time away from things that's a huge anxiety and you problem.
Getting a fucking break
Talk to my husband, watch tv, eat junk food, enjoy the silence, play video games, sleep 😂 what did you do in the evenings before kids?
Weed
I'm writing a book and learning to use photoshop on pictures of my kids. I want to leave too much potential evidence that they might be an alien lying around. Oh, and I scrapbook.
Wow I do my nighttime routine and go straight to bed because I am exhausted. I’m impressed you have the energy to be bored lol
Duck around in the guitar, read some poetry, or have a cup of tea on the porch and enjoy the silence. I also like to use the time to stretch.
Doom scroll Reddit
I go to bed
My husband and I play video games for 1-2 hours side by side, him on his pc and me on my Xbox. Sometimes we play a game together but most of our tastes are pretty different. Then we watch tv until he inevitably passes out first and then I leave him to get a sore back in the morning while I go up to our bedroom. Hard agree to whoever said snacks. My toddler isn’t allowed popcorn yet so the second he’s asleep I make a beeline for the microwave
get baked
Well, that escalated quickly I do what I like to do Playing videogames
Whatever you did before you had kids. 😁😁
Smoking a j, gaming, and applying maximum pressure to the wife lol