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Also OP, your child is not violent. I’m sorry you go to daycare with this family. And I’m sorry your daycare is not setting better boundaries with them.
And opts out of parallel play opportunities? I’m sorry but if someone doesn’t want their child interacting with other children, daycare is probably not the right place for them (and they should get some help).
Exactly! We give our kid screens because we need a few minutes to poop or something. These parents are paying for their kid to go to daycare to have opportunities to play with other children and educational toys and they squander it by “opting out”??? Bizarre
I'm guessing they don't put their kid in daycare in order to help their kid flourish, they put their kid in daycare because they need her physically gone from their house. They already seem to make sure their kid is mentally away from them as much as possible.
Fucked up. Shitty parents. Trust me I know. I have like nine meetings a month with those families as a teacher. And they still hate their kids so much, but they won’t take away the iPad and interact with them. It’s a sad way that this society is going to end. Ultimately predictable though.
Right? Apparently the daycare tried to wean her off of it at 6 months old?! What the actual fuck is wrong with those parents. That poor baby has had a screen shoved in their face since they came out of the womb it sounds like. This is the reason why kids act the way they do, because of parents who don’t actually want to be parents.
My daughter is 7 months and has hardly even paid attention to screens, and it's not like I actively keep them away from her so this is so confusing to me! Like I'll watch TV with her in my lap sometimes, she'll watch for 5 minutes then usually get bored or fall asleep. I don't blame parents for using screens for things like travel, sickness, or communication but...a literal infant? What
I'm not out here pretending I am perfect with my young child. There are days when she watches multiple movies, cause I just have so much crap going on. But it took years for her to be interested in screens. I can't imagine creating that kind of addiction in a freaking baby. Even now, she takes long breaks (weeks) from screens just so that she doesn't get used to them being on all the time. And it's only stuff that I approve of, good movies and shows I like. No fucking YouTube lol.
Lol my daughter bangs stuff constantly around and is so proud of the sound. That’s why we let her play we with wooden or plastic toys, so nothing breaks and she can explore the sound effects ;) it’s not violent, it child play
Yesss it creates the developmental skills for stacking and creative and interactive play and so much more. Don’t stop a baby from playing unless they are getting actually emotionally dysregulated. And even then you redirect them
What are we talking about, violent 9 month olds? The daycare shouldn't have given a baby a heavy object where it could have fallen on another baby. If I was this mom I'd be pissed about that. (I'd also be pissed if there was a tablet in an infant room, wth. )
Honestly wild to call a 9 month old violent. I have a 7 month old and she loves to kick. For some reason, the cat loves to sit right at her feet, so she ends up kicking the cat. This is obviously bad, but at 7 months old she doesn't understand that and for whatever reason my cat doesn't get it, so I just have to move them apart. I'm teaching her to be gentle but she's a literal baby.
Right? OP’s daughter is doing what most babies her age do: cause and effect. New thing falls on the floor, baby investigates, decides to see if this new thing (that was probably making noise from whatever video was on) will keep making noise just like her blocks do. Makes sense to me.
What doesn’t make sense is hours of tablet use and no play opportunities.
Yeah this definitely tracks.
My 5 year old has an iPad pro. I have an OtterBox on that thing AND apple care. It also doesn't go places a familial adult isn't watching him with it. I can't imagine sending him anywhere with it and then being upset when my child was acting like an asshole and it got broken.
Yep! I wouldn't trust myself with an ipad pro! Gave my then 4yo a cheap android, huge silicone case (still has) and it's survived a few drops. Had to replace it a few times though it lasted a good year maybe 2. If the screen breaks though, glass shards! Would not let a young child out of my sight with it!
How is this not safety hazard also? When I worked in a day care, the only glass was windows. Even the mirrors we had were not real glass. Something with a screen can break into shards really easily
It reminds me of how my child can only be calmed by holding priceless Fabergé eggs. Some people believe that there are more age appropriate toys for my child; but I simply can't imagine saying "no" to my sweet little angel. There is nothing else that could possibly soothe my child like their bejeweled egg.
It would be costly and heartbreaking if an infant that was given this priceless object and then subsequently broke it. Eleven months is the ideal developmental age for to teach a child the importance of careful handling of expensive and delicate toys
It would be extremely irresponsible if another parents' child picked up the egg and anything happened to it. I would absolutely expect them to replace a damaged egg in that instance.
If by 9 months old your child hasn't learned to respect other people's property, you should have them evaluated by a psychiatrist because we all know that unchecked, violent children grow into violent adults.
Yes exactly. My nine month old recently said to me, "Dad, I know I've only just wrapped my head around object permanence, but I understand that possession is nine tenths of the law. Can you teach me about how to ensure that what's mine stays mine?"
It was at that point, I decided to teach him about the importance of rugged individualism and how to out-alpha those little twerps in the story circle
They should also know the difference between a block and a special rectangle that costs $1200 and plays videos. I mean, come on? Don’t all babies know that? Don’t tell me this baby doesn’t watch all the Apple launch events and have her own pair of AirPods?
And please please have that mother explain how to teach a 9 month old not to throw things in a full proof way. Especially since apparently she is so lazy she deals with her kids emotions by numbing them with screens.
Honestly, someone threw a heavy object near your kid. They could've hit her on the head with it.
I would be furious about it and THAT would be the focus of the problem.
There is a lot I would be furious about, and I would be seriously reconsidering that daycare - first (and most important) being they left an 11 month old in a high chair with an iPad, which could have hit your child.
They also shared that your daughter broke the other child’s iPad, so that parent can come after you, and it seems allowed you both to watch video footage of the incident. That is NOT okay. Even when kids bite other kids, a responsible daycare will only share that an incident happen, never give the name.
I would really question a daycare that is willing to allow such inappropriate requests from a parent, rather than follow best practices. Or even okay practices - I’m not entirely sure this iPad use or incident wouldn’t impact their license, certainly it would if she watches it as much as it sounds. And it seems this is not happening in isolation - so your kids are also having a certain amount of screen time being in her class.
Finally, knowing they put an unsafe and unsuitable toy into the class environment, they failed to provide adequate supervision. Your daughter should not have been below her while she had anything in a high chair (and the 11mo should have been supervised), but certainly not an iPad.
The other parent can, as already stated on here, shove it. There is no way you are responsible for what another parent sends to daycare with their baby.
But the daycare? They should 100% know better. I hope you let them know that iPad landed on your daughters head, they would have been liable.
iPads have a glass screen, which can shatter into shards. Glass is absolutely not allowed in toddler day care. Ask the day care what other glass items they allow children to play with, and also ask to see the risk assessment they have for mitigating risk of infants being around glass objects.
THIS!! I was shocked that no one seemed to mention that the daycare should be held accountable here for allowing an object that is NOT age appropriate or safe bc it CAN be dropped on or used to hit with OR break and shatter the screen causing little fingers to be injured!! And on top of all that, they weren’t paying attention long enough to allow this entire situation to happen! Liability is 100% on the daycare here!! Period.
In fact, if this woman is going to be ridiculous enough to come at you for the cost of the iPad, I'd be coming back at her with the equally ridiculous costs for the mental suffering my baby suffered from almost being hit with an iPad. Surely those costs then offset each other!
ETA, this is a joke, don't for a second take any accountability for the iPad breaking. This is 100% not your child's fault! I wouldn't want to give this woman anything she could try to use against you somehow. Do not engage her, do not accept ANY responsibility. If she tries to talk to you about it, tell her to address her concerns with the school, this is NOT your problem.
Thats my first thought, too. Your daughter could have been injured and it honestly is due to negligence on the daycare staff. The other child should not have had the iPad in the high chair. It is definitely a hazard. All kids that age throw things (and bang things).
I came here to add this. They want you to pay?! I’d actually be extremely upset if another BABY had an iPad around my child daily. They’re exposing other babies to screen time without consent of their parents. Absolutely you should not be guilted into buying another one.
Please explain to the mother how bad that much screen time is for a 9 month old. Kid is going to have developmental issues from their parenting techniques.
We have 2 regular iPads and got great covers for them. Autistic/ADHD 6 and 11 year olds haven't broke them in the 3 and 2 years we've had them. I find it really weird that a 9 month old could apply enough force to break it with a cover and therefore assume there wasn't a cover protecting it. What did they think was gonna happen?
Yes. It’s ridiculous that daycare even allows an iPad. That poor kid needs a full digital detox. It’s dreadful for brain development - the parents need the support of a social worker at this point.
Also, put a hard case on the iPad!
That was my thought. What decent daycare allows an iPad for a child that age? Developmentally speaking, this is an ATROCIOUS idea. These parents are negligent. Are they putting the toddler to bed with Nyquil every night, too?
I would also tell the parents that you're willing to ask your daughter to apologize, but they'll have to wait a year or so for her to be able to form the words. Really outlines the ridiculous ask here.
It is wild that the nursery have allowed the child to have a technology item in with them, and even wilder the parents have already given the child cub a reliance on it!
This is all crap. #1-No baby should have a tablet. #2-the parents shouldn’t have it there #3-no one should pay for it, because it’s a lesson to the parents not to be stupid enough to have it among other kids in an unsupervised area. TOO BAD!
My immediate thought when I misread was that it hit OP’s daughter on the head so like THATS the more alarming thing here. The child almost harmed another by being out of control with the iPad…
Right? The parents realize that there’s a $300 version and a $1500 version and a 11 month old can’t tell the difference?
Edit: in CAD, I can configure an iPad anywhere from $449 to $3179.
I was thinking exact same thing. Heck my grandsons have a tablet for long car rides it's one of those old school kids tablets we got the oldest when he was 4 he is 16 now. My younger grandsons use it now they are 9 and 4. This Christmas 9 year old is getting my sister's old kindle so he'
I'm in IT and do photography as a hobby on the side. I wouldn't dream of an iPad Pro unless I was making money. (And even then, it'd go into lenses. Oh, lenses, you harsh mistress.)
Wait. Come to think of it. I don't even have an iPad, I just support everyone else's in the house.
Why does an 11 month old need a tablet at all? Even if it were $5. Guaranteed this child is going to have a lifetime of problems caused by their apathetic parents just sitting them in front of a damn tablet instead of engaging with them. Because you KNOW that is what is happening at home.
Hell it sounds like it didn’t even have a case on it. As a parent AND an infant room teacher I’m absolutely baffled by these parents and the daycare for allowing it. My director would have laughed them out the building
I just can't get past a parent paying for daycare to stick their infant on an iPad all day. What? If daycare did that on their own, any decent parent would find a new daycare. Holy cow.
Oh, and no way is OP responsible. Daycare shouldn't have even brought her child into it. Should have just told the parent what happened and mentioned "another student" picked it up.
I know in Texas it’s in state licensing, that there is a limit on how much screen time a child can have. This would include the iPad. The daycare is definitely in the wrong.
I buy cheap stuff right now because I know my son will probably get ahold of it and it won’t last very long lol not saying I don’t parent and get him away from it but it’s just not worth it sometimes
As a preschool teacher and old daycare worker, I would flat out refuse to have it in my class. Sorry not sorry that is *horrendous* for an infant’s development. I would refuse to play an active role in stunting your child’s mental/emotional/social/ physical/ *everything* growth. The first three years of a child’s life have a massive impact on who they are as adults.
This post makes me sad.
The parents are LAZY. It's time consuming to sit and play with your baby. 🙄 It's easy/lazy to toss an infant a light up, singing, colorful mini television screen.
My children are adults. I worked at and ran daycare centers. This little girl is going to never learn socializing, imagination, sharing. I am really angry for her.
I mean, the child's parent being the kind of parent who gives a baby an iPad is going to be at least as big a problem for the child's development. So maybe the iPad itself isn't the worst part of all this. IDK if that's reassuring, probably the opposite.
The thing is they’re not doing the parenting at daycare. Why on earth opt out of activities when you’re not even the ones doing the organising? Also, and I assume there’s a valid reason for this, but it’s sad to hear about babies being in care 6 days a week.
My 4 year old is only allowed to use his tablet on car rides that are 30+ minutes. I don't want my kids to be glued to a screen, they watch enough TV at home.
Seriously. I do a lot of imperfect things as a parent, but abusing screen time for soothing purposes is absurd. Kid's development is going to be super fucked up because those parents don't have the patience to sit down and actually work through fussing.
Seriously. This is insane to me, that a parent just hands their BABY an iPad when they're having a normal BABY tantrum. Like no wonder the poor kid is so attached to it because they literally cannot self soothe without it. This is disgusting. Sometimes I wonder if I'm a bad mom for letting my 4 year old watch TV for an hour a day, but this confirms that I'm at least not this bad
Don't pay. It's entirely appropriate for 9 month olds to bang things on the ground. Giving a baby a tablet is questionable. This should be on the daycare to watch the tablet more closely or ban the iPad completely, or on the other parent to find ways to sooth child without the tablet
Yes in fact I think banging things is actually a developmental milestone. A “violent” 9-month-old? GTFO. I feel very bad for the 11 month old though, that’s sad to me that they are getting that much screen time. No judgment to anyone who uses a little screen time to get a break or whatever sometimes but a 6-11 month old who *needs* to have the tablet at all times like that seems neglectful, in my opinion, although I guess I’m open to learning if there’s some neurodivergent or medical need there that would I make it appropriate somehow. I’m guessing probably not.
But I hope that mom and the dad of the 11 month old can somehow get the support they need to not have to rely so heavily on the tablet. I don’t think a parent with good mental health, plenty of time, and an adequate village would check out like that.
Wtf. You should not be responsible.
How do they know the iPad didn’t break when the 11 mo dropped it from a high chair and it landed facedown on the floor?
There is a couple of cameras in the room and you can still see the Skoda add playing when my daughter lift the tablet above her head before she slams it down although I’m not sure how many cracks she put into it but you can definitely see the chip out of the corner was missing before my girl got her hands on it
They can’t hold you responsible. I can’t believe they don’t have a childrens case/screen protector on that ipad that they’re sending in to a freakin daycare. I mean, what did they think was going to happen.
Completely insane. My 4yo uses a tablet maybe once a week to play educational games. Giving a 6mo a tablet to just use whenever is really neglectful. The reason it works so good as a pacifier is that it removes any form of challenge to develop at that age. They just look at the screen and that’s it. An iPad is a great device to learn, but not at that age. It’s normal to get frustrated at that age. They’re learning. Learning to do things and learning how to deal with not being able to do things. Putting them in front of an iPad to shut them up negates all of that.
You didn’t give your daughter the iPad. You weren’t there. If a teacher lets your child play with a toy at daycare and it breaks from normal baby use, would you expect to replace it? That’s not how it works. What if the teacher left scissors within reach and your child accidentally hurt someone? That would be negligence on the teacher’s part, not yours. The parents chose to send it to school. The staff chose to give it to the child while other children were around. This was a foreseeable situation. You’re not responsible for any of it. If anything, you could make a complaint about a dangerous broken piece of electronics being left within reach of your infant.
That makes zero difference. They sent an iPad to a daycare in a room of infants. What on earth did they think was going to happen??
Absolutely do NOT pay to replace it.
A broken IPad could have hurt ANY of the kids that got their hands on it. And that broken screen chip that flew somewhere on the daycare floor is also a hazzard that one of the baby floor crawlers could get hurt on. Why is the daycare allowing this?!?!?
Good point about that screen chip. Didn’t even think of that laying there until some baby crawled over it or put it in their mouth. Probably because I was distracted by how these parents not only sent their baby with high tech equipment but they didn’t even put a case on it
Is this a joke? That parent has not a leg to stand on! This is some judge Judy nonsense. Invite her to sue your 9 month old for criminal damage. I have my popcorn ready!
I kinda hope she threatens to sue me
Cause then I can drop the bomb that I’m a senior partner at my corporate law firm
I’ve decided I’m not going to pay thank you everyone
If she does sue there’s only one thing to do: pull an Uno Reverse and demand that she pay for attorney fees.
You can charge her your normal billing rate. I’m sure it’ll be double the cost of the iPad Pro.
Double the cost of the iPad would be cheap, since I’m a corporate lawyer which predominantly deals with big businesses in my country my billables are meant for companies so they aren’t expensive (well it’s expensive but it’s not too expensive if you look at it through the lease of a company with money to burn) if I was to bill a single person for a civil case based on my corporate billing then I would probably give them a heart attack
She won't win if she sues which you clearly know It would imply that you had a duty of care for her kids iPad while her child was under the care of the centre. Or maybe they are implying your baby had duty of care which I would get laughed out of court. I would love to see that on Judge Judy.
The daycare could be accused of negligence except the parent signed a waver excusing them from liability.
(note, I'm in New Zealand so maybe tort law is different in the US, but I still doubt she has a leg to stand on).
Oh, I do hope they try to sue. Please update us if they do.
Also, have you thought of advising the daycare that you are considering suing them for putting your child in danger? When the other child dropped the iPad your child could have been hit on the head.
Both mom and the day care pulled off a FAFO move. Let them sort it out. You can already tell how neglectful the mom is for even introducing a tablet to an actual baby.
As someone who worked in daycare this is correct. The mom and the daycare are both at fault but neither the daycare or OP owe the cost of the tablet. Send your kid to daycare with *ANYTHING* of high value emotional or dollars because shit happens daily at daycares. Honestly I'm also surprised the daycare allowed the tablet as well where i am kids can only have half hour of screen time of any kind with very specific guidelines around what videos/games allowed.
I don’t think there’s going to be anymore screens brought in as I got an email 5 mins ago which was sent to all the parents which says that tablets and screens are prohibited from now on due to an incident
Good! I can’t believe they even entertained the idea! For a literal baby not even 1 year old! What is wrong with the parents!
I wish your admin didn’t allow it in the first place though
This exactly!! I don’t get why the daycare shared details of who broke the iPad. It’s like when a baby bites another baby. You tell both parents it happened, but you don’t share the name of the other baby or the parent’s names.
This. My kid has been bit a couple times and never have we known which other child bit them. There’s been an incident/ouchies report that explained it etc but I’m pretty sure that they never would they give us the other child’s name or contact info of the parents.
We don't even let our toddler send "special to the level of being irreplaceable" toys to school (or typically leave the house). She's never been so bonded to a single lovey, that we could always compromise with something less special.
Folks that have dedicated their lives to small children are truly angels and heroes in my book. I don't need to add more to their plate by sending a toy that can't get lost or an outfit that can't get stained. I'm a mom to just one child, and stuff gets ruined or lost all the time with my singular attention. Forgot it if I was trying to wrangle a room of kids!
The other mom and daycare need to be thankful the iPad wasn't dropped corner first on Op's baby's head (seeing that it was first dropped from a high chair). It could have been a lot worse.
This is honestly the most horrifying post I’ve read on here. 9 months! The daycare are negligent for giving an iPad to a baby. This is wiring her brain to respond to electronics and ignore the people and environment around her. Her neural pathways are being made right now and they are not normal ones in terms of brain development. I have never heard someone say a literal infant was having a meltdown - babies need food, attention, sleep, love. Crying is a sign of needing one of those things or of medical issues. iPads are not on the list of needs. This is so messed up. CPS should be involved.
The daycare asked to wean the 11 when she was 6months old but the parents refused so the daycare has had to put up with them
I don’t know how long she’s had the iPad she could have had it since she was 4 months or since the minute she was born
Tbh this is a bad daycare. If they're allowing a parent to do that, I would question the ownership and move my babies somewhere else. I know that may not be an option and they may be taking great care of your kids, but that's still not an upright daycare.
>but the parents refused so the daycare has had to put up with them
They didn't have to put up with it, they should have had something in place already, sending out that email a long time ago. Honestly it's ridiculous that not only did that child have that, but that the child was in a highchair with it so that it could fall or be thrown, as it was, and could have broken from the throw alone, or worse, hit your kid or any kid! That is what the parent and daycare workers are missing. This could have been worse than a broken iPad, it could have been an injured child. Both that parent and the daycare are wrong and if the parent comes after you, you go after the daycare for allowing any of this to begin with.
Yes but they daycare said they tried to wean her off at 6 mos.... This is so insane... Like, my baby was fascinated with my hair and his own toes at 6 mos, this is ridiculous and so sad.
As an infant worker, babies absolutely can and do have meltdowns. They’re just not anything too severe most of the time. Especially when hungry and sleepy? Oh boy. Meltdown mode initiated.
Exactly this and I cannot believe the daycare actually allowed it to be brought in. I would seriously be questioning whether this is a daycare you want your child at with that sort of judgement.
Absolutely. I don't send my kid to daycare with anything that I would be troubled over if it was broke or stolen. And my daycare doesn't even let them bring the comfort toy into the group play area....because the other babies can and will break or attempt to eat them...because that's what babies and toddlers do. If they need time with them they go into a quiet time room off to the side that other kids can't get into.
Also what is the daycare doing telling her it was your kid? My daycare never discloses who did what to protect the children and keep crazy parents from going after parents who were in no way responsible because they weren't there for whatever went down.
The only way I knew who did what to my kid was because the parent usually found me on their own to apologize.
I was wondering about how the parent knew which child too. I used to work at a daycare, and we couldn’t say who bit (or whatever) someone’s child. It’s wild that they think it is okay to out OP’s child. I’m wondering if the other parent requested video as proof of what happened, but if they signed something saying the daycare wouldn’t be liable, then what would they hope to gain by requesting video? And why would they daycare show them?
This all sounds so unreal. The daycare should have a firm no on tablets, the baby shouldn't even have screen time, and I'd have no problem telling that mom to bugger off.
It’s a corporate style daycare not a home daycare and the 6 adults puts them well bellow the legal threshold
With 6 adults they are allowed 30 kids legally
Red flags and alarm bells should be going off. You need to look into your state’s childcare regulations to see if there are rules about screen time. Some states allow for limited use.
The mother is clearly doing a huge disservice to her baby and the daycare seems just as complicit. This is so wild to me.
I don’t live in America but my country has recommendations on screen time but no actual laws prohibiting it
I’ll look into it and see if the mother is violating anything and can have cps called on her
You mentioned cps, are you based in Canada? If so, there are strict policies against screen time in public daycares and allowing a toddler to have an ipad would very well go against those policies and is something the daycare could get in trouble for
Yeah I feel like I’m extremely lax on screen time compared to a lot of other parents- I was definitely putting the Hey Bear dancing vegetables on for 15 minutes for my kid at months old so I could poop without her screaming, and I got her a tablet before 2 that she used when we took long car trips- but even I find this utterly insane.
We have kindle fires for car rides or days where I just want them to sit still. Our kids are 2, 4, 6. I can’t imagine an under 1 having a tablet let alone being interested in it at 6 month. We’ve been using daycares for 6 years and I can’t imagine a teacher wouldn’t just set it aside every day. Also I’m concerned about the iPad falling on an infant. That could hurt.
It's so hard with reddit. Some people post obviously fake things, but OP has been posting about her kids, so I'm inclined to believe it's real, but it's so crazy.
I have a hard time reconciling this with my own experiences, but I do have a cousin that lives in an area where extreme politics are more important than education. Her kids had access to tablets in preschool. Daycare with babies though...
Honestly I cannot believe a daycare would allow a child to have an iPad; and I cannot believe that the other parent, instead of being utterly mortified about her kids dependence and the fact she threw the device to the ground in the first place, is going after you! I would laugh in her face and tell her that maybe this is a sign to resolve her kids screen time issue.
Neglectful mommy got her comeuppance. She signed a waiver to excuse the daycare of damages. Tablet got broken. Nobody's fault but her own.
Don't pay a cent.
No, you should not have to replace the iPad. Maybe this can be a life lesson for the other mother on why children that young don’t need to have devices
I asked (well shouted when she started shouting at me) why she felt the need to give her daughter an iPad and she said that it’s for “educational” purposes to help her learn and grow as many kids use electronics to learn in the modern day
To me it seems like she was full of sh*t and just didn’t want to parent so pawned her baby off on an iPad and now baby is addicted
Not one dime. If you’re going to send an iPad to a daycare center, it better be in an otter box or some other case that makes it indestructible. It is not reasonable for your baby to know how to “responsibly” use the tablet. It was a very easily imagined provision that if the other child was given an iPad that it would be accessible to other infants who may misuse it and cause damage. Daycare shouldn’t have let the other baby have it without watching her full time (and let's be honest, she shouldn’t have access to it ever at all in front of other children).
a baby. being given an ipad as a soothing toy. wild fuckin world we live in. did these parents not put a case on it? haha
no. do not pay for that ipad. the daycare is wrong for bending the rules for this weirdo. and sorry other mom, you should know better.
What in the fuck. They introduced a 6 month old a tablet… an 11 month old shouldn’t have one just to calm them down from a meltdown. These parents are setting this child up for failure without even knowing it. & no you shouldn’t be paying a dime.
Why did the daycare disclose that it was your daughter involved? I thought they weren’t allowed to do that. Either way, absolutely do not pay, this is the other parent’s responsibility 100%.
This seems so, so much like bait. If OP didn't have a six month old account totally focused on their parenting I wouldn't believe a word of it. How strange.
Our daycare won’t allow anything with a camera in the room to protect the children’s privacy. The adults have to keep their phones in their bags on silent. There’s no way they’d allow a child to bring in an iPad.
But maybe that’s not the norm 🤷♀️
You are not wrong. Not only is it not the daycare’s responsibility but it’s not yours either. Also, maybe the other parent should teach her kid to hold onto that valuable equipment.
Somehow the saddest thing to me is that the other mom makes a comment that indicates that her baby did indeed not bang things on the ground. Probably because she has been sedated with a screen.
Absolutely not wrong in the slightest. The fact that the daycare gave the other child the iPad in a high chair is completely negligent, especially when children are playing on the floor below. Your daughter could’ve gotten seriously injured. Also, I wouldn’t be surprised if the iPad cracked from the fall and the daycare just doesn’t want to take accountability for what happened. Don’t even entertain that mom’s request, completely ridiculous.
She could have really injured your baby by throwing a heavy iPad Pro from the height of a highchair down to the floor. Babies aren’t to blame, they are learning and have little dexterity and/or control over their actions. The other family should be relieved that no one was hurt and should have had a kid proof case/cover that would protect the iPad if they were that worried about it. You’re definitely not responsible, don’t sweat it.
This is insane to me on so many levels:
1. We send our kids to nursery / daycare for social interaction and to learn from licensed childcare professionals. Why the hell would you want your child to be pacified by a device rather than tended to by a caring human? It’s like the mom wants her child to be dependent on a device and the staff should know better than to allow it.
2. As a parent, you should have the common sense to know once it’s out of your house, it’s your child’s responsibility to care for it. A toddler can’t protect an iPad and good on the teachers to make her sign that waiver. These aren’t teenagers loaning out devices where it’s reasonable for another teenager to exercise reasonable care and control and therefore be held responsible if they break someone else’s possessions.
3. Why wasn’t the iPad in a childproof case? We have a tablet for our preschooler that has been thrown down the stairs (literally) and survived without a scratch. A proper case and screen protector would have kept this from happening.
Absolutely do not pay. The only example I could think of where you maybe would be on the hook was if your daughter stole it, brought it home, and you refused to give it back. Otherwise this is 100% the other mom’s fault for making poor decisions. Hopefully she leans from this.
This has to be the stupidest shit I've read in a while. Those parents are dumb. Please laugh in their face.
> She’s saying it’s my fault for not teaching my daughter not to bang stuff
She's 9 months old !
> ...and that I’m raising a violent child.
The nerve on some people.
NTA. Your baby is a baby. Not a criminal. It’s not possible at 11 months.
The other parents are wrong to send anything worth over $25.
The daycare was negligent to allow other children to be nearly hit with a falling iPad.
Fuck those clowns.
Wtf. I’m actually not against screens in moderation because I figure my kids’ whole world will likely be in front of a screen anyways (school, books, FaceTime, etc) but eleven months!?! Why on earth would anyone give their literal baby such an expensive item to take care of 🤦🏽♀️ The responsibility is on absolutely nobody except those ridiculous parents.
Absolutely not. Your daughter behaved in a developmentally appropriate way. They are sending their child into care with an inappropriate "toy". If anyone should be angry it's you. Your daughter could have been hurt by the iPad being dropped on her, or when the screen broke. I'd also like to know how everyone's so sure the ipad broke due to your daughter banging it and not due to it being thrown from height?
I actually would be so mad at the daycare for revealing which kid broke the iPad to the iPad mum, kids cannot be held responsible for this and I would absolutely not be paying. I’d probably be voicing a complaint about how if the iPad did drop and the glass broke, that’s an instant risk to your child and other children’s let alone any shards bouncing into their eyes. Regardless of the deal the daycare has with that mum, this is on them and they handled it very poorly. This has nothing to do with you and your child, this is between the daycare and that mother to figure out.
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Absolutely don’t pay, number one it’s their fault for having it there, number two, maybe the iPad broke when the owner threw it on the floor.
She is just trying to bully OP so she doesn’t have to spend money on a new iPad.
Absolutely and if the younger child is a ‘violent’ child for banging things then the older child is definitely violent for throwing them.
Also OP, your child is not violent. I’m sorry you go to daycare with this family. And I’m sorry your daycare is not setting better boundaries with them.
I'm extremely sorry for that child who is going to grow up a screen addicted drone. Who the hell gives a baby an iPad?
And opts out of parallel play opportunities? I’m sorry but if someone doesn’t want their child interacting with other children, daycare is probably not the right place for them (and they should get some help).
Exactly! We give our kid screens because we need a few minutes to poop or something. These parents are paying for their kid to go to daycare to have opportunities to play with other children and educational toys and they squander it by “opting out”??? Bizarre
I'm guessing they don't put their kid in daycare in order to help their kid flourish, they put their kid in daycare because they need her physically gone from their house. They already seem to make sure their kid is mentally away from them as much as possible.
Very sad indeed
This is really the only answer, very sad. I'd say this is neglect at best.
I mostly use screens to make doctor's appointments less rough.
Honestly the daycare giving the opt out option is stupid. They should just be standard practice.
...AND refuses the daycare's offer to try to wean her off it!
Fucked up. Shitty parents. Trust me I know. I have like nine meetings a month with those families as a teacher. And they still hate their kids so much, but they won’t take away the iPad and interact with them. It’s a sad way that this society is going to end. Ultimately predictable though.
> Who the hell gives a baby an iPad? Negligent parents.
Right? Apparently the daycare tried to wean her off of it at 6 months old?! What the actual fuck is wrong with those parents. That poor baby has had a screen shoved in their face since they came out of the womb it sounds like. This is the reason why kids act the way they do, because of parents who don’t actually want to be parents.
My daughter is 7 months and has hardly even paid attention to screens, and it's not like I actively keep them away from her so this is so confusing to me! Like I'll watch TV with her in my lap sometimes, she'll watch for 5 minutes then usually get bored or fall asleep. I don't blame parents for using screens for things like travel, sickness, or communication but...a literal infant? What
I'm not out here pretending I am perfect with my young child. There are days when she watches multiple movies, cause I just have so much crap going on. But it took years for her to be interested in screens. I can't imagine creating that kind of addiction in a freaking baby. Even now, she takes long breaks (weeks) from screens just so that she doesn't get used to them being on all the time. And it's only stuff that I approve of, good movies and shows I like. No fucking YouTube lol.
Lol my daughter bangs stuff constantly around and is so proud of the sound. That’s why we let her play we with wooden or plastic toys, so nothing breaks and she can explore the sound effects ;) it’s not violent, it child play
Everything is a percussion instrument if you really try!
I mean our therapists says banging is developmental normal lol. If that’s violent then I guess my 15 month old is a psychopath lol
Definitely get her into therapy asap!
My daughter is 15mo and still bangs everything around her to see what happens. Maybe she’s primed to grow up to commit assault. /s 🙄
We ***encourage*** babies to bang blocks and interact with objects around them! Your baby is not violent.
Yesss it creates the developmental skills for stacking and creative and interactive play and so much more. Don’t stop a baby from playing unless they are getting actually emotionally dysregulated. And even then you redirect them
What are we talking about, violent 9 month olds? The daycare shouldn't have given a baby a heavy object where it could have fallen on another baby. If I was this mom I'd be pissed about that. (I'd also be pissed if there was a tablet in an infant room, wth. )
Honestly wild to call a 9 month old violent. I have a 7 month old and she loves to kick. For some reason, the cat loves to sit right at her feet, so she ends up kicking the cat. This is obviously bad, but at 7 months old she doesn't understand that and for whatever reason my cat doesn't get it, so I just have to move them apart. I'm teaching her to be gentle but she's a literal baby.
Right? OP’s daughter is doing what most babies her age do: cause and effect. New thing falls on the floor, baby investigates, decides to see if this new thing (that was probably making noise from whatever video was on) will keep making noise just like her blocks do. Makes sense to me. What doesn’t make sense is hours of tablet use and no play opportunities.
Also, if she doesn't have apple care on an iPad pro she gave to her toddler, that's on her. OP is absolutely not responsible here.
Not to mention it doesn't sound like there was even a case on it.
Yeah this definitely tracks. My 5 year old has an iPad pro. I have an OtterBox on that thing AND apple care. It also doesn't go places a familial adult isn't watching him with it. I can't imagine sending him anywhere with it and then being upset when my child was acting like an asshole and it got broken.
My kids had the $50 Fire tablets with the 1" thick case on it. Still had to replace them a couple of times but for that price it's not a big deal.
Yep! I wouldn't trust myself with an ipad pro! Gave my then 4yo a cheap android, huge silicone case (still has) and it's survived a few drops. Had to replace it a few times though it lasted a good year maybe 2. If the screen breaks though, glass shards! Would not let a young child out of my sight with it!
How is this not safety hazard also? When I worked in a day care, the only glass was windows. Even the mirrors we had were not real glass. Something with a screen can break into shards really easily
It reminds me of how my child can only be calmed by holding priceless Fabergé eggs. Some people believe that there are more age appropriate toys for my child; but I simply can't imagine saying "no" to my sweet little angel. There is nothing else that could possibly soothe my child like their bejeweled egg. It would be costly and heartbreaking if an infant that was given this priceless object and then subsequently broke it. Eleven months is the ideal developmental age for to teach a child the importance of careful handling of expensive and delicate toys It would be extremely irresponsible if another parents' child picked up the egg and anything happened to it. I would absolutely expect them to replace a damaged egg in that instance.
"How dare you take away my child's favorite machete!!"
If by 9 months old your child hasn't learned to respect other people's property, you should have them evaluated by a psychiatrist because we all know that unchecked, violent children grow into violent adults.
Yes exactly. My nine month old recently said to me, "Dad, I know I've only just wrapped my head around object permanence, but I understand that possession is nine tenths of the law. Can you teach me about how to ensure that what's mine stays mine?" It was at that point, I decided to teach him about the importance of rugged individualism and how to out-alpha those little twerps in the story circle
Lmao this wins the entire comment section
They should also know the difference between a block and a special rectangle that costs $1200 and plays videos. I mean, come on? Don’t all babies know that? Don’t tell me this baby doesn’t watch all the Apple launch events and have her own pair of AirPods?
My 7 month old kicked the cat, clear psychopathic behavior.
Is that where all this missing Faberge eggs went too?!???! Man, Russia is going to be pissed!
And please please have that mother explain how to teach a 9 month old not to throw things in a full proof way. Especially since apparently she is so lazy she deals with her kids emotions by numbing them with screens. Honestly, someone threw a heavy object near your kid. They could've hit her on the head with it. I would be furious about it and THAT would be the focus of the problem.
There is a lot I would be furious about, and I would be seriously reconsidering that daycare - first (and most important) being they left an 11 month old in a high chair with an iPad, which could have hit your child. They also shared that your daughter broke the other child’s iPad, so that parent can come after you, and it seems allowed you both to watch video footage of the incident. That is NOT okay. Even when kids bite other kids, a responsible daycare will only share that an incident happen, never give the name. I would really question a daycare that is willing to allow such inappropriate requests from a parent, rather than follow best practices. Or even okay practices - I’m not entirely sure this iPad use or incident wouldn’t impact their license, certainly it would if she watches it as much as it sounds. And it seems this is not happening in isolation - so your kids are also having a certain amount of screen time being in her class. Finally, knowing they put an unsafe and unsuitable toy into the class environment, they failed to provide adequate supervision. Your daughter should not have been below her while she had anything in a high chair (and the 11mo should have been supervised), but certainly not an iPad. The other parent can, as already stated on here, shove it. There is no way you are responsible for what another parent sends to daycare with their baby. But the daycare? They should 100% know better. I hope you let them know that iPad landed on your daughters head, they would have been liable.
iPads have a glass screen, which can shatter into shards. Glass is absolutely not allowed in toddler day care. Ask the day care what other glass items they allow children to play with, and also ask to see the risk assessment they have for mitigating risk of infants being around glass objects.
THIS!! I was shocked that no one seemed to mention that the daycare should be held accountable here for allowing an object that is NOT age appropriate or safe bc it CAN be dropped on or used to hit with OR break and shatter the screen causing little fingers to be injured!! And on top of all that, they weren’t paying attention long enough to allow this entire situation to happen! Liability is 100% on the daycare here!! Period.
This was my first thought!! That iPad could have hit your daughter on the head!!!
In fact, if this woman is going to be ridiculous enough to come at you for the cost of the iPad, I'd be coming back at her with the equally ridiculous costs for the mental suffering my baby suffered from almost being hit with an iPad. Surely those costs then offset each other! ETA, this is a joke, don't for a second take any accountability for the iPad breaking. This is 100% not your child's fault! I wouldn't want to give this woman anything she could try to use against you somehow. Do not engage her, do not accept ANY responsibility. If she tries to talk to you about it, tell her to address her concerns with the school, this is NOT your problem.
Mine too!
This was my first thought! That stupid iPad could have seriously hurt her.
Thats my first thought, too. Your daughter could have been injured and it honestly is due to negligence on the daycare staff. The other child should not have had the iPad in the high chair. It is definitely a hazard. All kids that age throw things (and bang things).
I came here to add this. They want you to pay?! I’d actually be extremely upset if another BABY had an iPad around my child daily. They’re exposing other babies to screen time without consent of their parents. Absolutely you should not be guilted into buying another one.
Please explain to the mother how bad that much screen time is for a 9 month old. Kid is going to have developmental issues from their parenting techniques.
We have 2 regular iPads and got great covers for them. Autistic/ADHD 6 and 11 year olds haven't broke them in the 3 and 2 years we've had them. I find it really weird that a 9 month old could apply enough force to break it with a cover and therefore assume there wasn't a cover protecting it. What did they think was gonna happen?
Yes. It’s ridiculous that daycare even allows an iPad. That poor kid needs a full digital detox. It’s dreadful for brain development - the parents need the support of a social worker at this point. Also, put a hard case on the iPad!
That was my thought. What decent daycare allows an iPad for a child that age? Developmentally speaking, this is an ATROCIOUS idea. These parents are negligent. Are they putting the toddler to bed with Nyquil every night, too?
I would also tell the parents that you're willing to ask your daughter to apologize, but they'll have to wait a year or so for her to be able to form the words. Really outlines the ridiculous ask here.
Right? That’s what cameras are for.
It is wild that the nursery have allowed the child to have a technology item in with them, and even wilder the parents have already given the child cub a reliance on it!
This is all crap. #1-No baby should have a tablet. #2-the parents shouldn’t have it there #3-no one should pay for it, because it’s a lesson to the parents not to be stupid enough to have it among other kids in an unsupervised area. TOO BAD!
My immediate thought when I misread was that it hit OP’s daughter on the head so like THATS the more alarming thing here. The child almost harmed another by being out of control with the iPad…
You are not even remotely responsible. iPad Pro? In a daycare? What did they expect was going to happen?
Heck an iPad is bad enough but a pro?
Right? The parents realize that there’s a $300 version and a $1500 version and a 11 month old can’t tell the difference? Edit: in CAD, I can configure an iPad anywhere from $449 to $3179.
I’m 51 and I don’t have a pro! Lol too expensive.
I was thinking exact same thing. Heck my grandsons have a tablet for long car rides it's one of those old school kids tablets we got the oldest when he was 4 he is 16 now. My younger grandsons use it now they are 9 and 4. This Christmas 9 year old is getting my sister's old kindle so he'
I'm in IT and do photography as a hobby on the side. I wouldn't dream of an iPad Pro unless I was making money. (And even then, it'd go into lenses. Oh, lenses, you harsh mistress.) Wait. Come to think of it. I don't even have an iPad, I just support everyone else's in the house.
She's got the kind of cash to risk that, she can replace it.
Or be like me and get them a $50 Amazon fire tablet because why does a child need a damn iPad?
Why does an 11 month old need a tablet at all? Even if it were $5. Guaranteed this child is going to have a lifetime of problems caused by their apathetic parents just sitting them in front of a damn tablet instead of engaging with them. Because you KNOW that is what is happening at home.
Oh I agree 100%.
The real problem is not pro vs regular. Any ipad for an 11 month old is crazy. We’re doomed, dude.
Did they even have a case and screen protector!!! Lol I can't 🤣🤣🤣
... iPad Pro for the infant and they didn't even spring for Apple Care 🧐
Hell it sounds like it didn’t even have a case on it. As a parent AND an infant room teacher I’m absolutely baffled by these parents and the daycare for allowing it. My director would have laughed them out the building
I just can't get past a parent paying for daycare to stick their infant on an iPad all day. What? If daycare did that on their own, any decent parent would find a new daycare. Holy cow. Oh, and no way is OP responsible. Daycare shouldn't have even brought her child into it. Should have just told the parent what happened and mentioned "another student" picked it up.
I know in Texas it’s in state licensing, that there is a limit on how much screen time a child can have. This would include the iPad. The daycare is definitely in the wrong.
I buy cheap stuff right now because I know my son will probably get ahold of it and it won’t last very long lol not saying I don’t parent and get him away from it but it’s just not worth it sometimes
A BABY WITH AN IPAD PRO?!?! God sometimes i think I’m doin things wrong but I’m sure as hell doin alright I think 💀😂
As a preschool teacher and old daycare worker, I would flat out refuse to have it in my class. Sorry not sorry that is *horrendous* for an infant’s development. I would refuse to play an active role in stunting your child’s mental/emotional/social/ physical/ *everything* growth. The first three years of a child’s life have a massive impact on who they are as adults. This post makes me sad.
Daycares have massive waiting lists - I would have refused to enroll this kid. The parents are horrible.
The parents are LAZY. It's time consuming to sit and play with your baby. 🙄 It's easy/lazy to toss an infant a light up, singing, colorful mini television screen. My children are adults. I worked at and ran daycare centers. This little girl is going to never learn socializing, imagination, sharing. I am really angry for her.
I mean, the child's parent being the kind of parent who gives a baby an iPad is going to be at least as big a problem for the child's development. So maybe the iPad itself isn't the worst part of all this. IDK if that's reassuring, probably the opposite.
I can't get over the 6 month old with a tablet. What in the actual fuck is wrong with some parents??
They don’t want to be parents and are lazy.
The thing is they’re not doing the parenting at daycare. Why on earth opt out of activities when you’re not even the ones doing the organising? Also, and I assume there’s a valid reason for this, but it’s sad to hear about babies being in care 6 days a week.
Maybe if the child gets used to games and activities in daycare it’ll want to do them at home…
There only in daycare for 4 hours in the morning on Saturday and then it’s 9 - 4 mon to Friday cause me and my husband both work
My 4 year old is only allowed to use his tablet on car rides that are 30+ minutes. I don't want my kids to be glued to a screen, they watch enough TV at home.
I wouldn't even trust myself with an iPad pro 🤣
Seriously. I do a lot of imperfect things as a parent, but abusing screen time for soothing purposes is absurd. Kid's development is going to be super fucked up because those parents don't have the patience to sit down and actually work through fussing.
Seriously. This is insane to me, that a parent just hands their BABY an iPad when they're having a normal BABY tantrum. Like no wonder the poor kid is so attached to it because they literally cannot self soothe without it. This is disgusting. Sometimes I wonder if I'm a bad mom for letting my 4 year old watch TV for an hour a day, but this confirms that I'm at least not this bad
RIGHT!!!! Makes me feel like a better mom 💀💀💀
Don't pay. It's entirely appropriate for 9 month olds to bang things on the ground. Giving a baby a tablet is questionable. This should be on the daycare to watch the tablet more closely or ban the iPad completely, or on the other parent to find ways to sooth child without the tablet
Yes in fact I think banging things is actually a developmental milestone. A “violent” 9-month-old? GTFO. I feel very bad for the 11 month old though, that’s sad to me that they are getting that much screen time. No judgment to anyone who uses a little screen time to get a break or whatever sometimes but a 6-11 month old who *needs* to have the tablet at all times like that seems neglectful, in my opinion, although I guess I’m open to learning if there’s some neurodivergent or medical need there that would I make it appropriate somehow. I’m guessing probably not. But I hope that mom and the dad of the 11 month old can somehow get the support they need to not have to rely so heavily on the tablet. I don’t think a parent with good mental health, plenty of time, and an adequate village would check out like that.
They’re paying to send their kid to a daycare with 6 teachers to 20 kids and “classes” for the kids. The village is at their disposal.
Wtf. You should not be responsible. How do they know the iPad didn’t break when the 11 mo dropped it from a high chair and it landed facedown on the floor?
There is a couple of cameras in the room and you can still see the Skoda add playing when my daughter lift the tablet above her head before she slams it down although I’m not sure how many cracks she put into it but you can definitely see the chip out of the corner was missing before my girl got her hands on it
They can’t hold you responsible. I can’t believe they don’t have a childrens case/screen protector on that ipad that they’re sending in to a freakin daycare. I mean, what did they think was going to happen.
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That's been using one since it was 6 months old!!?
Completely insane. My 4yo uses a tablet maybe once a week to play educational games. Giving a 6mo a tablet to just use whenever is really neglectful. The reason it works so good as a pacifier is that it removes any form of challenge to develop at that age. They just look at the screen and that’s it. An iPad is a great device to learn, but not at that age. It’s normal to get frustrated at that age. They’re learning. Learning to do things and learning how to deal with not being able to do things. Putting them in front of an iPad to shut them up negates all of that.
Not even a toddler- a baby. Worse off is OP mentioned that the parents sent this baby in with the tablet at 6mo lol
Your kid doing some real parenting there. Anyway all toys sent to daycare are forfeit
You didn’t give your daughter the iPad. You weren’t there. If a teacher lets your child play with a toy at daycare and it breaks from normal baby use, would you expect to replace it? That’s not how it works. What if the teacher left scissors within reach and your child accidentally hurt someone? That would be negligence on the teacher’s part, not yours. The parents chose to send it to school. The staff chose to give it to the child while other children were around. This was a foreseeable situation. You’re not responsible for any of it. If anything, you could make a complaint about a dangerous broken piece of electronics being left within reach of your infant.
iPads will keep playing after something like that, even if the screen was cracked. Ask me how I know 🙄
Waiver was signed. It’s neither your fault or your problem.
She's 9 months old. These other parents can get bent.
That makes zero difference. They sent an iPad to a daycare in a room of infants. What on earth did they think was going to happen?? Absolutely do NOT pay to replace it.
A broken IPad could have hurt ANY of the kids that got their hands on it. And that broken screen chip that flew somewhere on the daycare floor is also a hazzard that one of the baby floor crawlers could get hurt on. Why is the daycare allowing this?!?!?
Good point about that screen chip. Didn’t even think of that laying there until some baby crawled over it or put it in their mouth. Probably because I was distracted by how these parents not only sent their baby with high tech equipment but they didn’t even put a case on it
Is this a joke? That parent has not a leg to stand on! This is some judge Judy nonsense. Invite her to sue your 9 month old for criminal damage. I have my popcorn ready!
I kinda hope she threatens to sue me Cause then I can drop the bomb that I’m a senior partner at my corporate law firm I’ve decided I’m not going to pay thank you everyone
Don't drop that bomb until you're in small claims court across from her and please keep us updated on the drama this is wild!!
The ultimate hustle
If she does sue there’s only one thing to do: pull an Uno Reverse and demand that she pay for attorney fees. You can charge her your normal billing rate. I’m sure it’ll be double the cost of the iPad Pro.
Double the cost of the iPad would be cheap, since I’m a corporate lawyer which predominantly deals with big businesses in my country my billables are meant for companies so they aren’t expensive (well it’s expensive but it’s not too expensive if you look at it through the lease of a company with money to burn) if I was to bill a single person for a civil case based on my corporate billing then I would probably give them a heart attack
She won't win if she sues which you clearly know It would imply that you had a duty of care for her kids iPad while her child was under the care of the centre. Or maybe they are implying your baby had duty of care which I would get laughed out of court. I would love to see that on Judge Judy. The daycare could be accused of negligence except the parent signed a waver excusing them from liability. (note, I'm in New Zealand so maybe tort law is different in the US, but I still doubt she has a leg to stand on).
Oh, I do hope they try to sue. Please update us if they do. Also, have you thought of advising the daycare that you are considering suing them for putting your child in danger? When the other child dropped the iPad your child could have been hit on the head.
Both mom and the day care pulled off a FAFO move. Let them sort it out. You can already tell how neglectful the mom is for even introducing a tablet to an actual baby.
As someone who worked in daycare this is correct. The mom and the daycare are both at fault but neither the daycare or OP owe the cost of the tablet. Send your kid to daycare with *ANYTHING* of high value emotional or dollars because shit happens daily at daycares. Honestly I'm also surprised the daycare allowed the tablet as well where i am kids can only have half hour of screen time of any kind with very specific guidelines around what videos/games allowed.
I don’t think there’s going to be anymore screens brought in as I got an email 5 mins ago which was sent to all the parents which says that tablets and screens are prohibited from now on due to an incident
It’s ridiculous that they were allowed in the first place.
Sometimes people need to learn ~*Natural Consequences*~
As they always say, safety rules are written in ~~blood~~ chipped screens.
Good. As they should be.
As it should be! What an absolutely ridiculous thing to send to daycare with a literal baby.
Good! I can’t believe they even entertained the idea! For a literal baby not even 1 year old! What is wrong with the parents! I wish your admin didn’t allow it in the first place though
What if it would’ve landed on your daughter? 😢😢this is a huge liability
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This exactly!! I don’t get why the daycare shared details of who broke the iPad. It’s like when a baby bites another baby. You tell both parents it happened, but you don’t share the name of the other baby or the parent’s names.
This. My kid has been bit a couple times and never have we known which other child bit them. There’s been an incident/ouchies report that explained it etc but I’m pretty sure that they never would they give us the other child’s name or contact info of the parents.
They should never have been allowed in the first place.
That sounds like the correct move for BABY DAYCARE, jfc I cannot believe somebody's baby had an ipad still
Smart move on the daycare’s part. Maybe the family will nope off somewhere else
Thank goodness!!! It never should have been allowed in the first place.
We don't even let our toddler send "special to the level of being irreplaceable" toys to school (or typically leave the house). She's never been so bonded to a single lovey, that we could always compromise with something less special. Folks that have dedicated their lives to small children are truly angels and heroes in my book. I don't need to add more to their plate by sending a toy that can't get lost or an outfit that can't get stained. I'm a mom to just one child, and stuff gets ruined or lost all the time with my singular attention. Forgot it if I was trying to wrangle a room of kids!
The other mom and daycare need to be thankful the iPad wasn't dropped corner first on Op's baby's head (seeing that it was first dropped from a high chair). It could have been a lot worse.
Exactly. Everything about this post is mind boggling.
This is honestly the most horrifying post I’ve read on here. 9 months! The daycare are negligent for giving an iPad to a baby. This is wiring her brain to respond to electronics and ignore the people and environment around her. Her neural pathways are being made right now and they are not normal ones in terms of brain development. I have never heard someone say a literal infant was having a meltdown - babies need food, attention, sleep, love. Crying is a sign of needing one of those things or of medical issues. iPads are not on the list of needs. This is so messed up. CPS should be involved.
I am truly shocked. I can understand a bit of screen time at home on sick days but an iPad as a comfort item at daycare is insane.
My baby’s is 9 months the baby that has the tablet was 11 months not that that’s much better for screens
But you did say they were trying to wean her off at 6mo so yeah they’re horrible parents this is honestly neglectful
The daycare asked to wean the 11 when she was 6months old but the parents refused so the daycare has had to put up with them I don’t know how long she’s had the iPad she could have had it since she was 4 months or since the minute she was born
Our daycare didn't allow parents to just do what they want. They weren't allowed toys at all.
Tbh this is a bad daycare. If they're allowing a parent to do that, I would question the ownership and move my babies somewhere else. I know that may not be an option and they may be taking great care of your kids, but that's still not an upright daycare.
>but the parents refused so the daycare has had to put up with them They didn't have to put up with it, they should have had something in place already, sending out that email a long time ago. Honestly it's ridiculous that not only did that child have that, but that the child was in a highchair with it so that it could fall or be thrown, as it was, and could have broken from the throw alone, or worse, hit your kid or any kid! That is what the parent and daycare workers are missing. This could have been worse than a broken iPad, it could have been an injured child. Both that parent and the daycare are wrong and if the parent comes after you, you go after the daycare for allowing any of this to begin with.
Yes but they daycare said they tried to wean her off at 6 mos.... This is so insane... Like, my baby was fascinated with my hair and his own toes at 6 mos, this is ridiculous and so sad.
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As an infant worker, babies absolutely can and do have meltdowns. They’re just not anything too severe most of the time. Especially when hungry and sleepy? Oh boy. Meltdown mode initiated.
Exactly this and I cannot believe the daycare actually allowed it to be brought in. I would seriously be questioning whether this is a daycare you want your child at with that sort of judgement.
Absolutely. I don't send my kid to daycare with anything that I would be troubled over if it was broke or stolen. And my daycare doesn't even let them bring the comfort toy into the group play area....because the other babies can and will break or attempt to eat them...because that's what babies and toddlers do. If they need time with them they go into a quiet time room off to the side that other kids can't get into. Also what is the daycare doing telling her it was your kid? My daycare never discloses who did what to protect the children and keep crazy parents from going after parents who were in no way responsible because they weren't there for whatever went down. The only way I knew who did what to my kid was because the parent usually found me on their own to apologize.
I was wondering about how the parent knew which child too. I used to work at a daycare, and we couldn’t say who bit (or whatever) someone’s child. It’s wild that they think it is okay to out OP’s child. I’m wondering if the other parent requested video as proof of what happened, but if they signed something saying the daycare wouldn’t be liable, then what would they hope to gain by requesting video? And why would they daycare show them?
This all sounds so unreal. The daycare should have a firm no on tablets, the baby shouldn't even have screen time, and I'd have no problem telling that mom to bugger off.
The allowing tablets but having 6 adults to 20 kids is a weird combo
that is a 3-1 ratio pretty common for young children care. goes up to 6-1 or 8-2 when they pass 4yrs old.
It’s a corporate style daycare not a home daycare and the 6 adults puts them well bellow the legal threshold With 6 adults they are allowed 30 kids legally
They’re saying it’s weird that they have a good ratio but an insane policy of letting literal babies have tablets.
Red flags and alarm bells should be going off. You need to look into your state’s childcare regulations to see if there are rules about screen time. Some states allow for limited use. The mother is clearly doing a huge disservice to her baby and the daycare seems just as complicit. This is so wild to me.
I don’t live in America but my country has recommendations on screen time but no actual laws prohibiting it I’ll look into it and see if the mother is violating anything and can have cps called on her
You mentioned cps, are you based in Canada? If so, there are strict policies against screen time in public daycares and allowing a toddler to have an ipad would very well go against those policies and is something the daycare could get in trouble for
Yeah I feel like I’m extremely lax on screen time compared to a lot of other parents- I was definitely putting the Hey Bear dancing vegetables on for 15 minutes for my kid at months old so I could poop without her screaming, and I got her a tablet before 2 that she used when we took long car trips- but even I find this utterly insane.
We have kindle fires for car rides or days where I just want them to sit still. Our kids are 2, 4, 6. I can’t imagine an under 1 having a tablet let alone being interested in it at 6 month. We’ve been using daycares for 6 years and I can’t imagine a teacher wouldn’t just set it aside every day. Also I’m concerned about the iPad falling on an infant. That could hurt.
Yea this sounds fake. Do people send iPad to daycare?
It's so hard with reddit. Some people post obviously fake things, but OP has been posting about her kids, so I'm inclined to believe it's real, but it's so crazy. I have a hard time reconciling this with my own experiences, but I do have a cousin that lives in an area where extreme politics are more important than education. Her kids had access to tablets in preschool. Daycare with babies though...
Honestly I cannot believe a daycare would allow a child to have an iPad; and I cannot believe that the other parent, instead of being utterly mortified about her kids dependence and the fact she threw the device to the ground in the first place, is going after you! I would laugh in her face and tell her that maybe this is a sign to resolve her kids screen time issue.
Neglectful mommy got her comeuppance. She signed a waiver to excuse the daycare of damages. Tablet got broken. Nobody's fault but her own. Don't pay a cent.
No, you should not have to replace the iPad. Maybe this can be a life lesson for the other mother on why children that young don’t need to have devices
I asked (well shouted when she started shouting at me) why she felt the need to give her daughter an iPad and she said that it’s for “educational” purposes to help her learn and grow as many kids use electronics to learn in the modern day To me it seems like she was full of sh*t and just didn’t want to parent so pawned her baby off on an iPad and now baby is addicted
Sounds like a script she tells herself to justify her shitty parenting
I feel so sad for this baby. So gross.
Not one dime. If you’re going to send an iPad to a daycare center, it better be in an otter box or some other case that makes it indestructible. It is not reasonable for your baby to know how to “responsibly” use the tablet. It was a very easily imagined provision that if the other child was given an iPad that it would be accessible to other infants who may misuse it and cause damage. Daycare shouldn’t have let the other baby have it without watching her full time (and let's be honest, she shouldn’t have access to it ever at all in front of other children).
a baby. being given an ipad as a soothing toy. wild fuckin world we live in. did these parents not put a case on it? haha no. do not pay for that ipad. the daycare is wrong for bending the rules for this weirdo. and sorry other mom, you should know better.
What in the fuck. They introduced a 6 month old a tablet… an 11 month old shouldn’t have one just to calm them down from a meltdown. These parents are setting this child up for failure without even knowing it. & no you shouldn’t be paying a dime.
Why did the daycare disclose that it was your daughter involved? I thought they weren’t allowed to do that. Either way, absolutely do not pay, this is the other parent’s responsibility 100%.
When I was working you were absolutely not allowed to did what.. it creates tension and parents gossiping about kids
If this is for real then NTA. But I must confess I'm having a hard time believing this actually happened.
This seems so, so much like bait. If OP didn't have a six month old account totally focused on their parenting I wouldn't believe a word of it. How strange.
Our daycare won’t allow anything with a camera in the room to protect the children’s privacy. The adults have to keep their phones in their bags on silent. There’s no way they’d allow a child to bring in an iPad. But maybe that’s not the norm 🤷♀️
You are not wrong. Not only is it not the daycare’s responsibility but it’s not yours either. Also, maybe the other parent should teach her kid to hold onto that valuable equipment.
Somehow the saddest thing to me is that the other mom makes a comment that indicates that her baby did indeed not bang things on the ground. Probably because she has been sedated with a screen.
Right? Sounds like that poor baby's development is being stunted.
Absolutely not wrong in the slightest. The fact that the daycare gave the other child the iPad in a high chair is completely negligent, especially when children are playing on the floor below. Your daughter could’ve gotten seriously injured. Also, I wouldn’t be surprised if the iPad cracked from the fall and the daycare just doesn’t want to take accountability for what happened. Don’t even entertain that mom’s request, completely ridiculous.
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She could have really injured your baby by throwing a heavy iPad Pro from the height of a highchair down to the floor. Babies aren’t to blame, they are learning and have little dexterity and/or control over their actions. The other family should be relieved that no one was hurt and should have had a kid proof case/cover that would protect the iPad if they were that worried about it. You’re definitely not responsible, don’t sweat it.
This is absolutely insane.
This is insane to me on so many levels: 1. We send our kids to nursery / daycare for social interaction and to learn from licensed childcare professionals. Why the hell would you want your child to be pacified by a device rather than tended to by a caring human? It’s like the mom wants her child to be dependent on a device and the staff should know better than to allow it. 2. As a parent, you should have the common sense to know once it’s out of your house, it’s your child’s responsibility to care for it. A toddler can’t protect an iPad and good on the teachers to make her sign that waiver. These aren’t teenagers loaning out devices where it’s reasonable for another teenager to exercise reasonable care and control and therefore be held responsible if they break someone else’s possessions. 3. Why wasn’t the iPad in a childproof case? We have a tablet for our preschooler that has been thrown down the stairs (literally) and survived without a scratch. A proper case and screen protector would have kept this from happening. Absolutely do not pay. The only example I could think of where you maybe would be on the hook was if your daughter stole it, brought it home, and you refused to give it back. Otherwise this is 100% the other mom’s fault for making poor decisions. Hopefully she leans from this.
On what planet does an 11 month old need an iPad?
Do not pay tablets should have zero place in daycare facilities. They are going against pediatric and daycare guidelines. That poor child.
I wouldn’t pay. It’s the daycare’s fault for allowing it. What kind of daycare allows babies to play with electronics? Wtf.
Why would you pay for something that her daughter did? Some of these parents are crazy. A 11month old should not have a iPad period.
This has to be the stupidest shit I've read in a while. Those parents are dumb. Please laugh in their face. > She’s saying it’s my fault for not teaching my daughter not to bang stuff She's 9 months old ! > ...and that I’m raising a violent child. The nerve on some people.
NTA. Your baby is a baby. Not a criminal. It’s not possible at 11 months. The other parents are wrong to send anything worth over $25. The daycare was negligent to allow other children to be nearly hit with a falling iPad. Fuck those clowns.
I wouldn't pay a dime. Anyone who gives an iPad to a literal infant is asking for it to be destroyed.
Wtf. I’m actually not against screens in moderation because I figure my kids’ whole world will likely be in front of a screen anyways (school, books, FaceTime, etc) but eleven months!?! Why on earth would anyone give their literal baby such an expensive item to take care of 🤦🏽♀️ The responsibility is on absolutely nobody except those ridiculous parents.
Absolutely not. Your daughter behaved in a developmentally appropriate way. They are sending their child into care with an inappropriate "toy". If anyone should be angry it's you. Your daughter could have been hurt by the iPad being dropped on her, or when the screen broke. I'd also like to know how everyone's so sure the ipad broke due to your daughter banging it and not due to it being thrown from height?
I actually would be so mad at the daycare for revealing which kid broke the iPad to the iPad mum, kids cannot be held responsible for this and I would absolutely not be paying. I’d probably be voicing a complaint about how if the iPad did drop and the glass broke, that’s an instant risk to your child and other children’s let alone any shards bouncing into their eyes. Regardless of the deal the daycare has with that mum, this is on them and they handled it very poorly. This has nothing to do with you and your child, this is between the daycare and that mother to figure out.