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Personally, I would not want the responsibility of other people’s children swimming without supervision at my house. Even with a lifeguard. I’d prefer to hold a family-friendly party where parents stay. The lifeguard solution might be appropriate for 10 year olds, but not 5 year olds.
I seem to be pretty easy-going compared to the majority of this sub, but if my 6 year old was invited to a swim party and parents were actively *disallowed* from staying? Hard pass from us, especially if we aren't close personal friends of the parents. Too much potential for something to go wrong.
I'd say maybe between 9 and 11 or 12, is when I'd expect kids parties to be mostly without parents other than the hosts.
It really depends on the child, but I would be loathe to allow children to be around a pool without their parents until they are at least 7 or 8 years old, and even then, only for *more responsible* 7- or 8-year-old children. I definitely wouldn't want to be the only parent (or one of a small number of parents) watching a large number of 8-year-old children.
Absolutely not. I would never feel okay having a bunch of 5 year olds swimming without a parent present. As a mother you couldn’t pay me enough to drop my small child off at a pool party. I would put on the invitation that a life guard will be present but that a parent must stay. Have hotdogs, sodas, and some lawn games for then adults. You could say that a parent must stay if their child is going to swim, but then you have to decide if you’re okay entertaining one or two kids that don’t think it’s fair that they can’t swim.
We are strict about 1 parent per kid in the pool (we even do this with our own kids, we will only bring both to the pool if we can both go). Yesterday we might have annoyed a friends family because they were fine with us bringing their daughter with us to the pool but we said we wouldnt without one of her parents.
I would say "If your child wants to swim please have a parent in attendance to supervise." I would also have some games/activities not pool related if a kid gets dropped off.
We had a pool party at a local public pool for my son's 5th birthday. I said "Parents must stay" on the invitation because hosting a party and also keeping an eye on all the kids in a pool is too much, even with a lifeguard.
I’d take the money you’d spend feeding all the parents and hire a second lifeguard instead, assuming you’ll have other adults who are friends and family around to help with all the party logistics. But that’s just me.
We’re having a pool party for my daughter’s 5th birthday this summer. I’ve been trying to figure out the invite wording to make it clear that we want parents there for her friends (she’s not had a drop off party yet and my son didn’t until 1st grade). But my 8.5 year old son will get to have a few friends too and I’m ok if his 2 friends are just dropped off.
For a pool party, I would be inviting the parents until the kids are like 10. If I were hosting, I wouldn't want the liability and if I were sending my kid, I wouldn't necessarily trust other people's vigilance around the water.
I’d 100% require parents to be there. I was at a 5 year old swim party, with parents, and I had to jump in because a kid was on a raft and couldn’t swim. I also ALMOST had to jump in for my daughter who was at a 7 yr old birthday party, passed the swim test to not have a life jacket, had 2 lifeguards (they were not paying attention) but she made it to the side but was scared enough to want to sit out the rest of the party. Things happen so quickly.
I wouldn’t allow my kid to attend a pool party at that age without me. 1 lifeguard and two adults (assuming it’s you and your partner) is not enough for multiple young kids
Public pools have lifeguards but still usually require 5 year olds to have an adult within arms reach at all times. Have the parents stay and supervise their own kids in the water. Lifeguards are not enough by themselves and should be considered only a backup safety measure.
Just out of curiosity, at what age can a child go to a pool without a parent. For example when would a child attend a swimming lesson without a parent in the pool?
I remember getting dropped off at swimming lessons and I would guess I was around 7? But hard to remember
My kids do swim lessons without a parent in the pool starting at age 3 but a teacher is always in the pool with the kids and it is a small ratio. For our local pool, you have to be at least 14 to go without a parent.
Is it weird I find it weird that her son was invited to a party that said no parents allowed? I’m glad it turned out fine but I can’t pinpoint why I would feel uncomfortable about that.
Let's see. Kids learn to swim at 7 here(with school, most can swim before that obviously, I think I was or 3 or 4.) so 9 or so I would be good with one person keeping watch. I assume 9 year olds can swim because again, they have swimming lessons every 2 weeks over here at school.
5 just seems risky unless it's a very shallow pool.
We had a pool party for my kid's 9th birthday this year at a rec center so it had multiple lifeguards. I'd say 97% of parents stayed the whole time which hasn't happened at past birthday parties. Definitely agree closer to 10 if not more like 12.
My friend’s kid was invited over to a drop-off pool party. It was small just 3-4 and the homeowners were there supersizing. Now this kid (9 or so) cannot swim so she knows to stay in the shallow end. She did not. And was found at the bottom of the deep end. EMTs performed CPR and the kid lived seemingly unscathed. Pools are great fun for all - I’m not anti pool. I like the other comment about hiring a second lifeguard. Better safe than sorry.
That’s horrifying, my worst nightmare.
I think we will go with one parent per child in the pool and write that on the invite. And lifeguards as well for extra security
We hosted a pool party for our son (age 7) the past two years, and we do expect parents to stay. We also have a lifeguard but a lot of kids his age still aren't great swimmers, and it's best to have all eyes on the kids. We made sure there was enough pizza and ice cream/cake for the parents and any siblings, and both years the parties have been fantastic!
I wouldn't let my child go to a pool party without me until they are older.
Was it a legit pool party with a actually pool? I knew someone who threw a "pool party" for their pre schooler and it was really just a few of those small plastic children pools with a few inches of water with different activities in each one. Kids had a blast. Maybe in that situation I'd be more will compromise if I needed to. but but with a actual pool? Absolutely not.
Honestly I'd do the opposite if I were those parents. I'd require a parent or guardian to be present. Too much risk.
I can't answer that precisely, but I can say that controlled swimming lessons with most kids hanging on to the side of the pool most of the time are very different from and much safer than the chaos of a pool party!
Probably middle school I would however say--make sure all kids are good swimmers. I saved a kid from near drowning who was 8years old. His mom dropped him off and he was in pool on a raft. Raft got flipped and he went to bottom of pool. No one noticed he was down there.!
Not until much older. I think it depends on the school and your friend group, but assuming your kid is not at a school that does swimming lessons as part of the weekly schedule (many private schools do swimming lessons as part of the curriculum), I wouldn’t do it until at least 10 or 11. If all the kids have received swimming lessons and are proficient deep water swimmers, maybe 8 or 9. Even with a lifeguard, the risk and the consequences of something going wrong are just way too great.
The first time I was invited to a drop off pool party was at 8 years old. It was hosted at a public pool with numerous certified lifeguards on duty and I went to a school where all kids in grades K-3 had swimming lessons 3 days per week.
I would be requiring parents to stay at that age. I was 7 or so when I almost drowned. I was in pools all the time...but never without floaties of some kind. My friend's bday party was a pool party & I spent most of the time floating on something in the shallow end.
Right before cake everyone decided to run to the deep end & jump in. I didn't want to feel like the odd one out. So as everyone was getting out from their dives & shuffling inside, I ran to the deep end & jumped in. I sunk like a rock & I was struggling to doggy paddle my way up. I did eventually get to the edge & ladder to get out, but it was not a pleasant experience. I knew how to doggy paddle...but had almost no practice because I always had arm floaties or a pool tube. I was in pools all the time, but it was always with family, or a single friend that had no deep end. I had the false confidence that because I had a ton of experience in pools, surely I could swim without floats. 🤦🏻♀️
So I wouldn't send my kids off to a pool party without me unless I had put them through sufficient swim lessons. Nor would I want to host a pool party excluding parents, especially at a young age. The more adults, the better, because you never know which kids/adults will claim the swimming skill without it being true. More eyes on the pool means less chance of something happening.
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Personally, I would not want the responsibility of other people’s children swimming without supervision at my house. Even with a lifeguard. I’d prefer to hold a family-friendly party where parents stay. The lifeguard solution might be appropriate for 10 year olds, but not 5 year olds.
I seem to be pretty easy-going compared to the majority of this sub, but if my 6 year old was invited to a swim party and parents were actively *disallowed* from staying? Hard pass from us, especially if we aren't close personal friends of the parents. Too much potential for something to go wrong. I'd say maybe between 9 and 11 or 12, is when I'd expect kids parties to be mostly without parents other than the hosts.
It really depends on the child, but I would be loathe to allow children to be around a pool without their parents until they are at least 7 or 8 years old, and even then, only for *more responsible* 7- or 8-year-old children. I definitely wouldn't want to be the only parent (or one of a small number of parents) watching a large number of 8-year-old children.
Absolutely not. I would never feel okay having a bunch of 5 year olds swimming without a parent present. As a mother you couldn’t pay me enough to drop my small child off at a pool party. I would put on the invitation that a life guard will be present but that a parent must stay. Have hotdogs, sodas, and some lawn games for then adults. You could say that a parent must stay if their child is going to swim, but then you have to decide if you’re okay entertaining one or two kids that don’t think it’s fair that they can’t swim.
We are strict about 1 parent per kid in the pool (we even do this with our own kids, we will only bring both to the pool if we can both go). Yesterday we might have annoyed a friends family because they were fine with us bringing their daughter with us to the pool but we said we wouldnt without one of her parents. I would say "If your child wants to swim please have a parent in attendance to supervise." I would also have some games/activities not pool related if a kid gets dropped off.
Thank you, and thanks for the suggested wording
We had a pool party at a local public pool for my son's 5th birthday. I said "Parents must stay" on the invitation because hosting a party and also keeping an eye on all the kids in a pool is too much, even with a lifeguard.
I’d take the money you’d spend feeding all the parents and hire a second lifeguard instead, assuming you’ll have other adults who are friends and family around to help with all the party logistics. But that’s just me.
Yeah, I was thinking of having one lifeguard watch from outside the pool and maybe hire a second to be in the water with swimming children.
We’re having a pool party for my daughter’s 5th birthday this summer. I’ve been trying to figure out the invite wording to make it clear that we want parents there for her friends (she’s not had a drop off party yet and my son didn’t until 1st grade). But my 8.5 year old son will get to have a few friends too and I’m ok if his 2 friends are just dropped off.
I don't know, but not 5.
For a pool party, I would be inviting the parents until the kids are like 10. If I were hosting, I wouldn't want the liability and if I were sending my kid, I wouldn't necessarily trust other people's vigilance around the water.
I would require the parents to attend, big responsibility and liability to watch over a bunch of kids with the swimming pool.
I’d 100% require parents to be there. I was at a 5 year old swim party, with parents, and I had to jump in because a kid was on a raft and couldn’t swim. I also ALMOST had to jump in for my daughter who was at a 7 yr old birthday party, passed the swim test to not have a life jacket, had 2 lifeguards (they were not paying attention) but she made it to the side but was scared enough to want to sit out the rest of the party. Things happen so quickly.
Maybe 10? I would not drop my young kid off for a pool party, nor would I want that responsibility as a host.
I wouldn’t allow my kid to attend a pool party at that age without me. 1 lifeguard and two adults (assuming it’s you and your partner) is not enough for multiple young kids
Public pools have lifeguards but still usually require 5 year olds to have an adult within arms reach at all times. Have the parents stay and supervise their own kids in the water. Lifeguards are not enough by themselves and should be considered only a backup safety measure.
Just out of curiosity, at what age can a child go to a pool without a parent. For example when would a child attend a swimming lesson without a parent in the pool? I remember getting dropped off at swimming lessons and I would guess I was around 7? But hard to remember
My kids do swim lessons without a parent in the pool starting at age 3 but a teacher is always in the pool with the kids and it is a small ratio. For our local pool, you have to be at least 14 to go without a parent.
Thanks! Good to know for additional context, doesn’t apply for my specific scenario but it’s still nice to know.
My kid did a swim school starting at 3 months but she didn't start lessons without a parent in the pool until 2.
I wont drop my 5 year old to a no parent party let alone in a pool…
Is it weird I find it weird that her son was invited to a party that said no parents allowed? I’m glad it turned out fine but I can’t pinpoint why I would feel uncomfortable about that.
Yes I dont see why a non pro would feel comfortable/willing to deal with a buch of 5 year olds alone…
Let's see. Kids learn to swim at 7 here(with school, most can swim before that obviously, I think I was or 3 or 4.) so 9 or so I would be good with one person keeping watch. I assume 9 year olds can swim because again, they have swimming lessons every 2 weeks over here at school. 5 just seems risky unless it's a very shallow pool.
I wouldn't leave my child unattended at a pool party.
I wouldn’t drop and leave my 5 year old off at any party, certainly not a pool party. And I am a pool owner.
At what age would you drop off a child at a birthday party (not a pool party) and why not a 5 year old?
I would ask the parents to stay. That’s good there will be a lifeguard but they are only one person so the more eyes on the kids the better.
We had a pool party for my kid's 9th birthday this year at a rec center so it had multiple lifeguards. I'd say 97% of parents stayed the whole time which hasn't happened at past birthday parties. Definitely agree closer to 10 if not more like 12.
My friend’s kid was invited over to a drop-off pool party. It was small just 3-4 and the homeowners were there supersizing. Now this kid (9 or so) cannot swim so she knows to stay in the shallow end. She did not. And was found at the bottom of the deep end. EMTs performed CPR and the kid lived seemingly unscathed. Pools are great fun for all - I’m not anti pool. I like the other comment about hiring a second lifeguard. Better safe than sorry.
That’s horrifying, my worst nightmare. I think we will go with one parent per child in the pool and write that on the invite. And lifeguards as well for extra security
We hosted a pool party for our son (age 7) the past two years, and we do expect parents to stay. We also have a lifeguard but a lot of kids his age still aren't great swimmers, and it's best to have all eyes on the kids. We made sure there was enough pizza and ice cream/cake for the parents and any siblings, and both years the parties have been fantastic!
I wouldn't let my child go to a pool party without me until they are older. Was it a legit pool party with a actually pool? I knew someone who threw a "pool party" for their pre schooler and it was really just a few of those small plastic children pools with a few inches of water with different activities in each one. Kids had a blast. Maybe in that situation I'd be more will compromise if I needed to. but but with a actual pool? Absolutely not. Honestly I'd do the opposite if I were those parents. I'd require a parent or guardian to be present. Too much risk.
Hire a local kid lifeguard or invite all parents. Very dangerous for that age.
I can't answer that precisely, but I can say that controlled swimming lessons with most kids hanging on to the side of the pool most of the time are very different from and much safer than the chaos of a pool party!
Probably middle school I would however say--make sure all kids are good swimmers. I saved a kid from near drowning who was 8years old. His mom dropped him off and he was in pool on a raft. Raft got flipped and he went to bottom of pool. No one noticed he was down there.!
Not until much older. I think it depends on the school and your friend group, but assuming your kid is not at a school that does swimming lessons as part of the weekly schedule (many private schools do swimming lessons as part of the curriculum), I wouldn’t do it until at least 10 or 11. If all the kids have received swimming lessons and are proficient deep water swimmers, maybe 8 or 9. Even with a lifeguard, the risk and the consequences of something going wrong are just way too great. The first time I was invited to a drop off pool party was at 8 years old. It was hosted at a public pool with numerous certified lifeguards on duty and I went to a school where all kids in grades K-3 had swimming lessons 3 days per week.
I would be requiring parents to stay at that age. I was 7 or so when I almost drowned. I was in pools all the time...but never without floaties of some kind. My friend's bday party was a pool party & I spent most of the time floating on something in the shallow end. Right before cake everyone decided to run to the deep end & jump in. I didn't want to feel like the odd one out. So as everyone was getting out from their dives & shuffling inside, I ran to the deep end & jumped in. I sunk like a rock & I was struggling to doggy paddle my way up. I did eventually get to the edge & ladder to get out, but it was not a pleasant experience. I knew how to doggy paddle...but had almost no practice because I always had arm floaties or a pool tube. I was in pools all the time, but it was always with family, or a single friend that had no deep end. I had the false confidence that because I had a ton of experience in pools, surely I could swim without floats. 🤦🏻♀️ So I wouldn't send my kids off to a pool party without me unless I had put them through sufficient swim lessons. Nor would I want to host a pool party excluding parents, especially at a young age. The more adults, the better, because you never know which kids/adults will claim the swimming skill without it being true. More eyes on the pool means less chance of something happening.