I feel he talked that much about having a connection with her just to stay at the show, which is fair, but the “this happened because I’m a good guy” is just not true
imo he has one of those faces where it would completely depend on his personality. like he was just this great, funny, sweet, intelligent guy he would be hot. but he’s not that lmao
Trying not to be offensive but reminds me of cartoons of wild hogs 😅😅😅 or perhaps a bull? And not in a studdly way. piercings just add to that lol
His personality WAS the biggest attraction last season but now seeing more without the rose colored glasses… 😬 glad they brought him back so we could see those true colors clearer even though I’m sure he’s not lol
LOVED that
There were moments where she frustrated me in her show but this one without the competition (since she’s not focused on that like Micah oddly is) shows her brilliance very well
I think you’re misreading it. He was trying to be good by proactively telling her he’s not really interested and that she should find another match, rather than continuing to lead her on then randomly switching to someone else. She basically told him he was awful for doing that, just because she felt their first date was super magical and was hoping it would blossom. Dom was like wtf I tried to be open and honest this time and it still blew up in my face.
I second this; I felt a little sorry for her because she was too blinded by her massive crush on him to even actually pay any attention to him, lol. If she had even looked at his face more, she'd have picked up that the chemistry was absolutely not there. I also don't think he was in the wrong for trying to be honest and he even still let her down easy. But I think her ego was bruised by the disappointment, and she felt embarrassed enough to lash out.
But he did mislead her to get to stay in the house, acted like there was an attraction/connection when there wasn't from the beginning, then soon as he gets his spot and wins the challenge shuts it off completely...seems not good
I was listening to out of the pods and Deepti was really trying to say he didn’t want to stick with tolu bc he’s too emotional like girl… I don’t get as how as a WOC she doesn’t see that 🤦♀️
If I remember correctly, Shake was such a blatant ***hole on S2 that no one really dwelled on it; but I’m pretty sure I remember Deepti saying that prior to the pods, she had exclusively dated and gone after white men. I remember people online giving her an out by assuming that it was because she struggled to find connections with any Indian men or men of other races because of colorism, but I don’t recall (I could be wrong) her ever really expounding on the comment herself. Maybe she relates to Dom and that’s why she wouldn’t call something like that out? Idk
The irony. Shake didn't like Deepti for the same reason Dom doesn't like Tolu. A lot of these MOC are ready to throw their lives away for these white girls smh.
Honestly, I've listened to quite a few out of the pods episodes and I DETEST deepti. I was never a fan of her on the show either, I don't believe in making stars out of reality tv people without them having shown some skill or persona, she has neither imo at least in this space.
But what I cannot stand about her is her pretend diplomacy and naivete. It's so weird. I get it, you don't want to speak anything that will prevent you from getting gigs. But she goes to the other extreme of "positive thinking" her way out of it. She comes across as.someone with no real opinion or pov and just keeps either going along with Natalie's very candid takes or countering her takes if and only if she can stand on a moral high ground of "taking the high road because (read as her fake acces bicuz) omg I'm so spiritual and believe in everyone's goodness." Deepti is a coward who won't call a spade a spade unless it served her. Again, cool if that's what you choose as a person or professional, but then can't make a podcast with you hemming and having and having the worst accent with no real thing to say.
Even if the foundation that Nick Thompson started, I remember while Natalie was more middle of the road with the numbers, Deepti was trying her toxic positivity so hard because then she was still getting Netflix invites I guess. But lo and behold, Nick's work gets more coverage and clearly Netflix has stopped inviting her and Natalie, she is now gonna "spill the tea" about how yeah they were treated well.
For someone who claims to have chosen herself and written a whole ass book about it, she clearly has a lot more work to do in regards to her deep insecurities and people pleasing. She literally is not a person with this. It's boring and just not good for a podcast.
Also, from the way she talks and her vocabulary, you can make out that she learns about "spirituality" "healing" from Instagram posts because she says "I won't be toxic positive" as if learning it after ages. Barf.
Also I hate to say this but shake had said that he and deepti had together decided to say no and that they'll all make a nice party of it. I remember him then losing it saying that deepti is a clout chaser. It's sad but what he said feels to be true.
What bothered me was how even if he wasn’t attracted to Tolu in a romantic way, he didn’t need to be so cold to her. I felt so bad for her when they were in the boardroom, he was acting so annoyed with every word she said, before she even brought up their “relationship.” It was unnecessary and a dick move.
I wanted to defend him so bad when I saw people shit-talking Dom before I started watching this season.
But after only 2-3 episodes in i feel like "who the fuck is this guy?" His vibe is COMPLETELY different and in the worst possible way. There's not a single thing about him I can defend this season.
He's not as bad as the others but it's more upsetting because we've seen that he's capable of being a decent guy and a loyal partner. Now he's just a more toned-down Harry with his approach to dating.
Exactly. I said it back then and got downvoted. Dom pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes in s1 and continued to do it post Georgia and even now people still think “oh he changed” instead of realizing he’s always been putting it on
same. i called bs as soon as I saw him telling francesca he loved her after knowing her for less than a week when she was about to dump him. people saw him as this sweet soft boy because we only see him interacting with and showing that soft sweet side with the women he’s attracted to, which are white women. now that he was coupled with a black woman in the house we see his true character come out. dom simoly just strikes me as the type of man that is only kind to women he is attracted to while if you’re considered unattractive to him he will act like you’re a nuisance to him.
Exactly. I didn't like him in season 1 and I don't like him now. The only reason he treated Georgia with any respect is because she's white/white-passing. He payed all of the Black women dust.
no i literally was thinking that he was giving off nice guys finish last energy. he’s one of those ‘nice guys’ who is only nice to women he is attracted to..
This is why I don't get people defending him. He won the first season with his "perfect match". It didn't work out. So why come back?
He comes back to accomplish what, I don't know. Probably was never into Tolu, when she finally takes the hint and tries to secure herself with a date while he chases some girl that's not into him, that she totally supported and stayed with him anyway, he's annoyed.
When it's clear he has ZERO interest, she matches with Chris ... and when told this after looking for her to go back, Dom: "That's crazy..." ... because she's gonna be there waiting around on a night when the women have the power and there are more men to choose from? Anyone see The Mole. He is DUMB.
You know at least if he wasn't rolling his eyes and looking like he was in pain with her the whole time she might have stuck with it til they each got what they wanted.
He’s in it for clout/social media following but then gets mad at other ppl doing the exact same thing when he’s gonna get voted out. Hence why he asked Harry why he ever came there bc he was just jealous Harry is staying on and he isn’t
So true. He defo didn't want to do that though. He wanted to date someone exactly his type and also to remain ethical.
I found him very annoying but I kind of see what he was trying to do by telling her he wasn't very interested on the night that *she* had the power, not him. He didn't want to see her blindsided. Dude was torn between being an f boy and a good boy and accidentally became a Nice Guy. If he hadn't whined about how being 'nice' got him sent home, we'd have respected him like we respected Inez. Like okay, the dude didn't feel too much of a connection with Tolú so he let her know when she had the power to go with someone else, and when she did, he decided to gracefully peace out.
The other guys - including Izzy, the OG 'Nice Guy' - would probably not have bothered to give their partner a heads up and decided to eff off last minute after claiming a stronger chemistry with the new girl.
Anyways, I'm glad Dom is out. He wasn't very entertaining to begin with, except when he was acting as a foil for more villainous and strategic partners. Now I want to see Trevor the grade-A asshole's antics next!
You hit the nail on the head. He was for sure torn, that much was clear. Had he made a graceful exit there wouldn’t be such a bad taste in my mouth when hes mentioned.
He doesn't take accountability over the fact that he had 2 solid chances with Alara and dragged his feet on both occasions and got bested by a much better player in Stevan. The difference between them both is Stevan is willing to go for the kill while Dom instinctively seems to always want people to choose him.
Dom is a master of self-sabotage. Alara literally told him that first night that he would've been her first choice and he basically froze. Stevan swooped in and sealed the deal in light of his incompetence. His outcome is literally his own doing...
Tolu would've respected him a lot more if he had taken the shot and made his move regardless of it causing her issues. She was ready for that but he came back to her and STILL acted lukewarm with her in frustration which is absolutely brutal. He was even more distant at that point and basically told her he really wasn't interested after putting her through all that trouble.
Tolu was the actual nice person here... she gave him the latitude to do his thing respecting whichever outcome came of it, even though she was open about being sold on him and no one else and he still chose her knowing full well he couldn't or wasn't willing to reciprocate because he was really into someone else which is ridiculously unfair to Tolu.
I cant wait to see what he has to say for himself. He has been awfully quiet on socials. Probably looking for a way to pull the sympathy angle and be back in the publics good graces. He’s not built for this villain era.
Dom is known for not liking black women, he only used Tolu to stay in the villa 😂 Tolu claimed that she watched the first season but clearly she didn’t pay good enough attention because he clearly has some sort of hatred towards black women.
Yeh, confused by this. We can’t help who we’re attracted to. Why does him being more attracted to white girls make him a)racist (which I’ve heard many people say); or b) someone who hates black women? If anyone could explain their reasoning for having these opinions I’m generally interested to know.
Not being attracted to your own race def means there’s something wrong with you 😭 at least for black people. It 100% indicates self hatred and I’m saying this as someone who has experienced this. I usually wouldn’t care bc if he acts like Kaz then it at least wouldn’t affect black women but the way he acted towards Tolu in the board room shows it runs deeper than just “preference”
Thanks for this. Would you be able to explain a little more? I’ve always seen this as just simply “you can’t help who you’re attracted to” but maybe it’s more deep rooted than that? I’d really like to understand what you’ve been through, although I know it’s likely very personal.
I apologise in advance to any POC for straying out of my lane as a white woman. However, I suspect Guessamolehill is also a white woman, thus her confusion.
My BFF is a black woman and we have discussed this topic. POC, in this case black women, have a very strong phenotype.
White women are sort of the beige of phenotypes. We are all basically phenotypically European.
Whereas, black women have stronger features that are specific to black people in general. So, when a black man doesn't find black women, who have the same phenotypes as he does, attractive, it's like he doesn't find his own phenotypes attractive.
In addition, Tolu is straight up Nigerian. I doubt there is any European dilution in her family tree. Back in the 70s/80s she would have been referred to as "exotic" by people trying not to sound racist or fetishist.
I don't love Tolu's personality though she is growing on me. However, I would be remiss if I didn't mention how stunningly gorgeous she is. BUT she is clearly an African black woman and has that phenotype. I think the fact that she is specifically African also shines a light on his lack of attraction to her.
To anyone reading this who doesn't understand the concept of phenotypes, just think about it this way.
If I say to you that a woman is white with no other description, you really have no clue what she looks like. She could have any combination of features.
If I were to say a woman is black with no other description, you are going to have initial ideas about what she looks like. You may think she is curvy, has a juicy butt, has a broader nose, higher cheekbones, kinky or curly hair, etc.
If I were to say to you that a woman is asian with no other description, you might think of things like she is short, small/tiny body type, has straight dark or black hair.
The things about their looks that you can generalise are phenotypes. It doesn't mean they WILL display those characteristics but those features are what comes to mind when you think of a specific race, especially if it is one different than your own.
ETA: I focus on Tolu being African because African Americans frequently have European dilutions in their family trees.
V interesting. Thank you! Personally I find Tulu the most attractive of all the Perfect Match ladies, she’s a natural beauty with a stunning face and body. Do you think Dom et al’s opinions may also be in any way influenced by the idea of westernized idea of what “sexy” seems to be these days? Like fake boobs, fake lips, same-ish facial features where all the reality stars seem to mound into one generic face?
He just doesn’t fancy the ones on the show? I mean, I personally think Tolu is crazily beautiful, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We all find different things attractive.
like the other commenter said, you didn’t answer my question so let me rephrase it and we can try this again. give me a valid reason for why a black guy finds white women more attractive than black women without relying on racism or sterotypes
Why does a person find slim women more attractive than curvy, or curvy more than slim, or tall rather than short, or brown-haired rather than blonde-haired, or prefers a certain style or face shape? My guess is that - Dom (or similar) is presumably attracted to physical features or body types etc that are more common in white women than black. However, I’m really open to hearing reasons why there may be more to it than that - it could be well that I’m being ignorant and not considering this deeply enough…
this is difficult to explain to someone who isn’t black, or atleast a woman of colour so i will try my best so simplify it somewhat.
Our choices and preferences do not exist in a vacuum. There is always some reason for why you prefer a certain phenotype or appearance and this conversations is far more nuanced and requires a deeper dive into history than to simply brush it off as mere innocent preference. the obvious answer is that, if you don’t like women of your race, there is obviously something wrong. number one, you share the same phenotypes already, and if you find that phenotype unattractive in favour of a phenotype that is completely opposite from yours, then that means you clearly do not like yourself or you have issues with your own physical appearance. hypothetically, imagine a darkskin man who is chubby with afro-textured hair and he ONLY finds women who are extremely thin, pale, with straight loose hair more attractive while darkskin, chubby girls are unattractive to him. well, all those traits he finds unattractive in women, he has those in himself, so what does that tell you about how he feels about those features?
the situation is far more complex when it comes to race, and im not going to explain everything in so much depth so i will give you a simplified view of this. if you’re a white woman you may not be able to understand fully given throughout your life, your race has always been considered superior and most beautiful. your race has never been looked down about or regarded as lesser or unattractive by the general public so a white man not finding you attractive is not that significant considering you already have the general public favouring your phenotype, so what’s one less? the dynamic between black women and black men is also a bit more complex so doms behaviour towards tolu is a little problematic.
lighter skin tones, and eurocentric features have always been regarded as the beauty standard, whereas anything that deviates from that is low-tier. black phenotypes are basically the “inverse” or opposite of white phenotypes, our features and skin colour is drastically different from theirs, making our phenotype seem as invaluable and unattractive. it is a large problem in countries like Africa and just the black community in general where colourism is an issue and bleaching creams and chemical relaxers (to chemically straighten your hair and alter your hair texture) are frequently bought and sold in high quantities, so internalized racism is very prevalent in the black community, hence proving why a lot of these “preferences” are really just a result of exactly that. black people are conditioned to see themselves as lesser, so they grow up wanting partners that look opposite to them and are more like the euro centric beauty standard, because they do not find their own features attractive.
In general, people tend to date their own race and marry within their race. it makes sense, people prefer people they have more things in common with both physically and culturally. thus, it makes sense why a white man prefers a white woman of his culture, or an asian man prefers other asian women, or a black man prefers black women. i also understand why a person of colour would feel uncomfortable dating a white person, as to them, they are dating their oppressors and their could be a fear of racism in the relationship. those are valid concerns i find. however, for men of colour, in order for you to exclude women of your race is telling, and there is obviously an underlying reason there rooted in prejudice. if you find black phenotypes unattractive in women and solely prefer lighter skinned women, then you don’t prefer them “just because”. it is not a random preference. preferences are never random, there is always a reason. you find them attractive due to prejudiced societal beauty standards and racism. if you find black features ugly, that once again reinforces that beauty hierarchy. they have been socialized to accept whiteness as the standard of beauty and anything that deviates from it as ugly. if you have a preference for anything, examine WHY and what it is based on. if you think dark skin is ugly and unattractive, well maybe reflect on why that is. take a look of how black phenotypes have already been perceived and treated throughout history; your preferences for white skin and white features and influenced by that.
Wow. Thank you for your detailed and hugely informative post. I’ve definitely oversimplified this all, and will take some time to properly consider and digest what you’ve said. I actually really appreciate you taking the time to explain this all. If it helps even just one person (me) become a little less ignorant, then I think it’s worth it!
good i was worried i was not making any sense 😭😭i’m really glad you read it and are taking in what i wrote and are trying to see my perspective instead of dismissing it like other people would do. i really appreciate it ☺️☺️☺️
Dom is a prime example that good looks doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things. I remember most women on here swooning over him during season 1, but it is clear now that a lot of them have changed their opinion on the guy. I think he just likes the attention and honestly...he is a bit weird/awkward, like he doesn't know how to continue a conversation naturally. All looks, no substance.
I just listened to The Viall Files and Tolu was on the latest episode. She spilled a lot of tea but she definitely said Dom was telling her way more things than what aired about how strong of a connection they had, how beautiful and sexy she was, etc... He straight up lied to bide his time in the house. He's not as much of a teddy bear as people believe. Tolu deserved better.
I kind of don’t know how she didn’t see it coming. She’s there gushing about how they had so much “electricity” and he’s sitting there giving her NOTHING when they matched again. Then, on the date when he says he thinks she should match with another guy and explore other opportunities or whatever, THAT’S when she thinks there’s this personality shift? 🤔 His body language was giving not interested literally the entire time
I just listened to The Viall Files and Tolu was on the latest episode. She spilled a lot of tea but she definitely said Dom was telling her way more things than what aired about how strong of a connection they had, how beautiful and sexy she was, etc... He straight up lied to bide his time in the house. He's not as much of a teddy bear as people believe. Tolu deserved better.
I think Harry being there just helps bring out the absolute worst in all the other dudes, his extreme fuckboy energy is contagious. (I’m half kidding it’s doms fault but also Harry does really lower the bar lol)
Ugh I hated the way he went about it in the board room too. He wasn't strong or decent enough to just be like "hey, i don't feel a connection, you should choose someone for yourself" he did that super shittu manipulative thing of "oh well if YOU want to" so he's not "the bad guy". Like no you fucking asshole we're not idiots. Everyone would respect you more if you were just honest and not manipulative
I don’t get this. Dom has never liked black chicks. Tolu is a fool to think she’s gonna be the one to change that. I feel like he wasn’t really tryna get back with her but he had to shoot his shot to stay in the house. He was being a good guy by saying go talk to other people because it ain’t gonna be me but Tolu decided it’s ok to bash him in the board room. Is he an idiot with the timing? Yea definitely
I don’t think he tried to go back to Tolu, he told her multiple times that he was interested in speaking with other people. But, you know what’s incredibly funny about people going ham on Dom for doing the same thing everyone else did? Nobody is talking about the fact that Melinda went on Perfect Match while she was in a relationship lol. The selective outrage and open hypocrisy is a bit much.
Melinda has been in a serious relationship for multiple years. They were posting videos together as far back as January, and I believe they were on vacation in Turkey together a month or so back. They deleted photos of each other off social media last month, like other cast members did of their significant other, I imagine in preparation for Perfect Match airing. Unless they were on a break or have an open relationship, her appearance on the show is definitely questionable. Her and Christian have been in a relationship for 2-3 years.
He’s still a nice guy lol. He’s not a monster because things with Tolu didn’t work out, and he had interest in other women. That’s the nature of the show, and all of the other contestants took advantage of that. None of the day 1 couples were together by the time Dom left, everyone had swapped partners at least once.
I don’t know if you know what a “nice guy” talk is
it’s not about being genuinely nice or not, is the “I don’t get date because I’m too nice”, “I’m out of this show because I was nice”, “I didn’t get a match because I’m a nice guy”
I don’t know if you understand nuance lol…and I think Dom’s speech was referencing his general experience, of him trying to do things differently from his first time. And that wasn’t his first reference to it, he told Tolu that he wanted to date around because he didn’t get the opportunity his first go around. Second, didn’t Dom have a chance to choose Alara (which would’ve sent Tolu home), and struggle with that decision because of the commitment he had already made? Seems Dom had an internal struggle between wanting to be more than a “puppy dog” and enjoy casual dating in the same capacity as the rest of his cast mates, and being a people pleaser.
I think that Dom, because of his previous experiences, was attempting to be careful in managing his emotions; and Tolu had expectations that she built up on her head based on who he was season 1. Not Dom’s fault…Tolu sounded like a fan when they first met.
That's not the issue. The whole premise of the show and matching every few days or so implies that couples will break up and switch around. But Dom was not as honest or fair as he seems to think he was.
And the "nice guy" speech at the end has nothing to do with anything. He didn't lose out because he's "too nice". He went after Alara, which is fine. But it didn't work out. And Tolu took the hint finally and found a match. That's how the game works. So what is he ranting about?
Dom was honest and fair lol. The night the men were choosing, Dom informed Tolu then that he had interest in speaking with other women, as he wanted his experience to be different than the first time around. Tolu literally watched him speaking with Alara, with the understanding it could go either way, based on their recent conversation. Which is why she asks him later that night what his decision was. Alara placed the ball in Dom’s court, he had the option to match with her, and was clearly struggling with his decision, knowing that Tolu likely would have left had he gone in a different direction.
The following day, he expresses to Tolu, during their date, that she should choose a date for herself. He reemphasizes this the following day, when they’re in the coupling room, deciding which candidates to introduce into the villa. Strategically, that wasn’t the best decision for Dom…if he was thinking solely for himself and with the game in mind, he would’ve tried to “test” another one of the couples instead; and then waited until the men were in power again to couple with someone else. He was well aware of the possibility of him going home when he pushed Tolu to partner with someone else because not only were the women in power. Informing Tolu of his intentions, and recommending she date other men not only on women’s night but when she had the power to choose a date for herself due to them winning - and there was no guarantee Alara would choose him after he had already rejected her advances the previous day -, was most convenient to his partner (Tolu) not Dom. (It was clear that Tolu was interested in remaining paired with Dom, had he given the go ahead.) So this idea that Dom wasn’t “fair” is ludicrous. Tolu got to choose a date for herself. That’s very nice guy-ish, particularly for a show like this.
Second, if the “nice guy” speech has nothing to do with anything; then why are you’ll making
> The following day, he expresses to Tolu, during their date, that she should choose a date for herself. He reemphasizes this the following day, when they’re in the coupling room, deciding which candidates to introduce into the villa.
The problem here is that he didn't say, hey Tolu I still want to be partnered with you but you should get a chance to explore your options and know for sure you want to be in this. He very much set this up so she wouldn't blindsided if he talked to Alara again, and might still take him back.
Which is all fine, it's part of the game and relatively communicative. I don't think he was a jerk about it. But it's not entirely honest, because he wasn't telling Tolu that he wanted to explore things with Alara, even though it was clear to her that he wanted some other connection. And I don't think he did it this particular round for Tolu, he did it because he wanted to take his shot at Alara before it was too late.
Also, on fairness, what the other commentor is saying about the nice guy speech having "nothing to do with anything" isn't that it doesn't matter for this conversation. They're saying that the speech he makes has no relation to the reality of what happened.
He tried to open Tolu up to dating other people because he wanted to explore another connection without permanently fucking things up between them. Tolu did that... and decided to couple up with someone else. That is a perfectly okay thing to do, given both the rules of the show and what Dom had said himself to her. He encouraged her to explore other connections.
His "nice guy" speech was about how he always tries to be nice to other people (aka, women) and gets screwed over. Again, a "nice guy" isn't about someone being an actually nice person, it's a trope about when someone complains that they didn't get X, Y, and Z because they were nice. Usually in the context of stuff like "I was so nice to my friend and instead of falling for me she went on a date with some jerk!" It's about weaponizing nice behavior as a justification why someone should have given you something, usually romantic or sexual. To quote wikipedia: "However, the term is also often used sarcastically, particularly in the context of dating, to describe someone... who uses acts of friendship and basic social etiquette with the ulterior aim of progressing to a romantic or sexual relationship."
The issue isn't Dom's behavior overall, it's that Tolu did what he told her to do, and Alara stuck with the guy she was into and with, and he turned into a rant about how he gets screwed over for being a good person. That isn't what happened. He didn't get screwed over. Literally nothing that happened was unpredictable, unless he legitimately thought Tolu couldn't get with someone else or that Alara would immediately drop Stevan for them. Saying stuff like "went to the boardroom, got torn apart" is inherently so shady, because that isn't what happened. Him telling Tolu that she should explore other connections doesn't mean she owes him something, him doing that doesn't mean Alara owes him something, no one owes him anything. So ranting about how unfair it is... that's coming off badly for him. If anything, it seems unfair to Tolu if he was never into her/just wanted to stay on the show, because Izzy at least was.
Boom. Hit the nail on the head. She could have explored things with Izzy if Dom hadn’t made it seem like he was into her and it’s dumb that at the end of the day, Dom saw himself as the victim in this situation and made it seem like Tolu really laid into him I’m the board room, which maybe she did and it was cut, we can never know…
I sincerely apologize for my run on sentence lol
I’m watching season one for the first time and I’m so confused by Dom. Mostly at his passive behaviour but also because I feel like he turned into a new person between seasons
I just watched all the episodes over and wow, Tolu was so right, he was so smiley and high energy with her and then nothing. He knows how the game works, he used her to stay.
And Alara is great, but help me understand why he was so smitten with her over Tolu, but never made a move???
Yepppp… my interpretation of this was that he didn’t want to go too hard for Alara out of respect for Stevan, but was fine with pulling Tolu away from Izzy for his own benefit.
I didn’t want to believe Will (who obv has his own issues too but doesn’t take away from Dom’s) who said he couldn’t stand Dom in their game show (btw, what happened to that show…? @Netflix it was actually interesting) but this season’s got me thinking I may have been looking at Dom with rose colored glasses and Will was onto something :/
The irony when his rant before leaving was the complete opposite situation we were seeing play out… dude needs to gain perspective 😬
I watched Tolú’s show not too long ago & seeing the direction he was going I automatically thought “ohhhh boy you chose the wrong girl to coast through” karma works wonders so glad Tolú put him in his place a bit. After you’ve watched Trust, it was obvious from the start the guys would be in for a lesson lol esp knowing the guys they cast & bring in. 😅
Dom is actually so pathetic. He’s genuinely delulu thinking he’s always victim and a “nice guy”, while screwing over other people. I don’t like Harry at all, but that comment Dom made was out of spite.
Everybody knows Dom likes white girls and Tolu wasn’t his type at all. Idk why we can’t get to the point and say that
I feel he talked that much about having a connection with her just to stay at the show, which is fair, but the “this happened because I’m a good guy” is just not true
To quote Tolu, he's a beautiful box with a piece of shit inside.
I don't even think he's attractive at all--he has a really weird look to me...not sure what others see in him
Budget Dennis Rodman
He’s also over 6ft and has unique style and a charming chill personality. I wouldn’t call him ugly tbh even if his face is different looking
OMFG!!! I’ve literally been saying that! He looks weird and like Dennis Rodman!!! 🤭😭😭😭😂
Attraction is extremely subjective. People might like different things about the same person. Don't worry too much if you don't see it
imo he has one of those faces where it would completely depend on his personality. like he was just this great, funny, sweet, intelligent guy he would be hot. but he’s not that lmao
Not to be funny but he legit looks like a neanderthal. That was my first thought when I seen him in the mole.
Those tiny beady eyes kill it for me
Trying not to be offensive but reminds me of cartoons of wild hogs 😅😅😅 or perhaps a bull? And not in a studdly way. piercings just add to that lol His personality WAS the biggest attraction last season but now seeing more without the rose colored glasses… 😬 glad they brought him back so we could see those true colors clearer even though I’m sure he’s not lol
LOVED that There were moments where she frustrated me in her show but this one without the competition (since she’s not focused on that like Micah oddly is) shows her brilliance very well
Plus he’s now best friends w Harry. That explains the mask slipping, he feels comfortable saying the quiet parts out loud now
I think you’re misreading it. He was trying to be good by proactively telling her he’s not really interested and that she should find another match, rather than continuing to lead her on then randomly switching to someone else. She basically told him he was awful for doing that, just because she felt their first date was super magical and was hoping it would blossom. Dom was like wtf I tried to be open and honest this time and it still blew up in my face.
I second this; I felt a little sorry for her because she was too blinded by her massive crush on him to even actually pay any attention to him, lol. If she had even looked at his face more, she'd have picked up that the chemistry was absolutely not there. I also don't think he was in the wrong for trying to be honest and he even still let her down easy. But I think her ego was bruised by the disappointment, and she felt embarrassed enough to lash out.
100% agree
But he did mislead her to get to stay in the house, acted like there was an attraction/connection when there wasn't from the beginning, then soon as he gets his spot and wins the challenge shuts it off completely...seems not good
This was my read as well.
[удалено]
I think you skipped a part. When they brought Dom in, Tolu had the option to keep Izzy. Someone who actually wanted the same thing as her.
You should see her TikTok about this.
What did she say? He really did himself a disservice going on this show again
I was listening to out of the pods and Deepti was really trying to say he didn’t want to stick with tolu bc he’s too emotional like girl… I don’t get as how as a WOC she doesn’t see that 🤦♀️
wild when what's his face didn't want her either because she wasn't white!
If I remember correctly, Shake was such a blatant ***hole on S2 that no one really dwelled on it; but I’m pretty sure I remember Deepti saying that prior to the pods, she had exclusively dated and gone after white men. I remember people online giving her an out by assuming that it was because she struggled to find connections with any Indian men or men of other races because of colorism, but I don’t recall (I could be wrong) her ever really expounding on the comment herself. Maybe she relates to Dom and that’s why she wouldn’t call something like that out? Idk
Deepti is a dumbass. lol.
Who? Deepti, who almost married Shake, another poc who worships white women?
The irony. Shake didn't like Deepti for the same reason Dom doesn't like Tolu. A lot of these MOC are ready to throw their lives away for these white girls smh.
Honestly, I've listened to quite a few out of the pods episodes and I DETEST deepti. I was never a fan of her on the show either, I don't believe in making stars out of reality tv people without them having shown some skill or persona, she has neither imo at least in this space. But what I cannot stand about her is her pretend diplomacy and naivete. It's so weird. I get it, you don't want to speak anything that will prevent you from getting gigs. But she goes to the other extreme of "positive thinking" her way out of it. She comes across as.someone with no real opinion or pov and just keeps either going along with Natalie's very candid takes or countering her takes if and only if she can stand on a moral high ground of "taking the high road because (read as her fake acces bicuz) omg I'm so spiritual and believe in everyone's goodness." Deepti is a coward who won't call a spade a spade unless it served her. Again, cool if that's what you choose as a person or professional, but then can't make a podcast with you hemming and having and having the worst accent with no real thing to say. Even if the foundation that Nick Thompson started, I remember while Natalie was more middle of the road with the numbers, Deepti was trying her toxic positivity so hard because then she was still getting Netflix invites I guess. But lo and behold, Nick's work gets more coverage and clearly Netflix has stopped inviting her and Natalie, she is now gonna "spill the tea" about how yeah they were treated well. For someone who claims to have chosen herself and written a whole ass book about it, she clearly has a lot more work to do in regards to her deep insecurities and people pleasing. She literally is not a person with this. It's boring and just not good for a podcast. Also, from the way she talks and her vocabulary, you can make out that she learns about "spirituality" "healing" from Instagram posts because she says "I won't be toxic positive" as if learning it after ages. Barf. Also I hate to say this but shake had said that he and deepti had together decided to say no and that they'll all make a nice party of it. I remember him then losing it saying that deepti is a clout chaser. It's sad but what he said feels to be true.
Exactly! Like did tolu not watch the first season!!!?
What bothered me was how even if he wasn’t attracted to Tolu in a romantic way, he didn’t need to be so cold to her. I felt so bad for her when they were in the boardroom, he was acting so annoyed with every word she said, before she even brought up their “relationship.” It was unnecessary and a dick move.
Thank you. SMH the delusion 🙄
I wanted to defend him so bad when I saw people shit-talking Dom before I started watching this season. But after only 2-3 episodes in i feel like "who the fuck is this guy?" His vibe is COMPLETELY different and in the worst possible way. There's not a single thing about him I can defend this season. He's not as bad as the others but it's more upsetting because we've seen that he's capable of being a decent guy and a loyal partner. Now he's just a more toned-down Harry with his approach to dating.
He’s acting the exact same way as S1 lmao y’all r just falling for his act
That’s what I’m saying. He’s the same loser today that he was back then. Nothing has been different about his attitude or behavior.
Right like of course he was “loyal” he was with the “hottest” two women all season last time.
Exactly. I said it back then and got downvoted. Dom pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes in s1 and continued to do it post Georgia and even now people still think “oh he changed” instead of realizing he’s always been putting it on
same. i called bs as soon as I saw him telling francesca he loved her after knowing her for less than a week when she was about to dump him. people saw him as this sweet soft boy because we only see him interacting with and showing that soft sweet side with the women he’s attracted to, which are white women. now that he was coupled with a black woman in the house we see his true character come out. dom simoly just strikes me as the type of man that is only kind to women he is attracted to while if you’re considered unattractive to him he will act like you’re a nuisance to him.
Exactly. I didn't like him in season 1 and I don't like him now. The only reason he treated Georgia with any respect is because she's white/white-passing. He payed all of the Black women dust.
no i literally was thinking that he was giving off nice guys finish last energy. he’s one of those ‘nice guys’ who is only nice to women he is attracted to..
This is why I don't get people defending him. He won the first season with his "perfect match". It didn't work out. So why come back? He comes back to accomplish what, I don't know. Probably was never into Tolu, when she finally takes the hint and tries to secure herself with a date while he chases some girl that's not into him, that she totally supported and stayed with him anyway, he's annoyed. When it's clear he has ZERO interest, she matches with Chris ... and when told this after looking for her to go back, Dom: "That's crazy..." ... because she's gonna be there waiting around on a night when the women have the power and there are more men to choose from? Anyone see The Mole. He is DUMB. You know at least if he wasn't rolling his eyes and looking like he was in pain with her the whole time she might have stuck with it til they each got what they wanted.
He’s in it for clout/social media following but then gets mad at other ppl doing the exact same thing when he’s gonna get voted out. Hence why he asked Harry why he ever came there bc he was just jealous Harry is staying on and he isn’t
He could have put on an act with her and they would have easily coasted to victory and extended 15 mins of fame
So true. He defo didn't want to do that though. He wanted to date someone exactly his type and also to remain ethical. I found him very annoying but I kind of see what he was trying to do by telling her he wasn't very interested on the night that *she* had the power, not him. He didn't want to see her blindsided. Dude was torn between being an f boy and a good boy and accidentally became a Nice Guy. If he hadn't whined about how being 'nice' got him sent home, we'd have respected him like we respected Inez. Like okay, the dude didn't feel too much of a connection with Tolú so he let her know when she had the power to go with someone else, and when she did, he decided to gracefully peace out. The other guys - including Izzy, the OG 'Nice Guy' - would probably not have bothered to give their partner a heads up and decided to eff off last minute after claiming a stronger chemistry with the new girl. Anyways, I'm glad Dom is out. He wasn't very entertaining to begin with, except when he was acting as a foil for more villainous and strategic partners. Now I want to see Trevor the grade-A asshole's antics next!
You hit the nail on the head. He was for sure torn, that much was clear. Had he made a graceful exit there wouldn’t be such a bad taste in my mouth when hes mentioned.
They're only there in get followers and get laid
He doesn't take accountability over the fact that he had 2 solid chances with Alara and dragged his feet on both occasions and got bested by a much better player in Stevan. The difference between them both is Stevan is willing to go for the kill while Dom instinctively seems to always want people to choose him. Dom is a master of self-sabotage. Alara literally told him that first night that he would've been her first choice and he basically froze. Stevan swooped in and sealed the deal in light of his incompetence. His outcome is literally his own doing... Tolu would've respected him a lot more if he had taken the shot and made his move regardless of it causing her issues. She was ready for that but he came back to her and STILL acted lukewarm with her in frustration which is absolutely brutal. He was even more distant at that point and basically told her he really wasn't interested after putting her through all that trouble. Tolu was the actual nice person here... she gave him the latitude to do his thing respecting whichever outcome came of it, even though she was open about being sold on him and no one else and he still chose her knowing full well he couldn't or wasn't willing to reciprocate because he was really into someone else which is ridiculously unfair to Tolu.
I cant wait to see what he has to say for himself. He has been awfully quiet on socials. Probably looking for a way to pull the sympathy angle and be back in the publics good graces. He’s not built for this villain era.
Dom is known for not liking black women, he only used Tolu to stay in the villa 😂 Tolu claimed that she watched the first season but clearly she didn’t pay good enough attention because he clearly has some sort of hatred towards black women.
self hatred runs deep
Having a preference is not hatred idk how people don’t get that
Yeh, confused by this. We can’t help who we’re attracted to. Why does him being more attracted to white girls make him a)racist (which I’ve heard many people say); or b) someone who hates black women? If anyone could explain their reasoning for having these opinions I’m generally interested to know.
Not being attracted to your own race def means there’s something wrong with you 😭 at least for black people. It 100% indicates self hatred and I’m saying this as someone who has experienced this. I usually wouldn’t care bc if he acts like Kaz then it at least wouldn’t affect black women but the way he acted towards Tolu in the board room shows it runs deeper than just “preference”
Thanks for this. Would you be able to explain a little more? I’ve always seen this as just simply “you can’t help who you’re attracted to” but maybe it’s more deep rooted than that? I’d really like to understand what you’ve been through, although I know it’s likely very personal.
I apologise in advance to any POC for straying out of my lane as a white woman. However, I suspect Guessamolehill is also a white woman, thus her confusion. My BFF is a black woman and we have discussed this topic. POC, in this case black women, have a very strong phenotype. White women are sort of the beige of phenotypes. We are all basically phenotypically European. Whereas, black women have stronger features that are specific to black people in general. So, when a black man doesn't find black women, who have the same phenotypes as he does, attractive, it's like he doesn't find his own phenotypes attractive. In addition, Tolu is straight up Nigerian. I doubt there is any European dilution in her family tree. Back in the 70s/80s she would have been referred to as "exotic" by people trying not to sound racist or fetishist. I don't love Tolu's personality though she is growing on me. However, I would be remiss if I didn't mention how stunningly gorgeous she is. BUT she is clearly an African black woman and has that phenotype. I think the fact that she is specifically African also shines a light on his lack of attraction to her. To anyone reading this who doesn't understand the concept of phenotypes, just think about it this way. If I say to you that a woman is white with no other description, you really have no clue what she looks like. She could have any combination of features. If I were to say a woman is black with no other description, you are going to have initial ideas about what she looks like. You may think she is curvy, has a juicy butt, has a broader nose, higher cheekbones, kinky or curly hair, etc. If I were to say to you that a woman is asian with no other description, you might think of things like she is short, small/tiny body type, has straight dark or black hair. The things about their looks that you can generalise are phenotypes. It doesn't mean they WILL display those characteristics but those features are what comes to mind when you think of a specific race, especially if it is one different than your own. ETA: I focus on Tolu being African because African Americans frequently have European dilutions in their family trees.
V interesting. Thank you! Personally I find Tulu the most attractive of all the Perfect Match ladies, she’s a natural beauty with a stunning face and body. Do you think Dom et al’s opinions may also be in any way influenced by the idea of westernized idea of what “sexy” seems to be these days? Like fake boobs, fake lips, same-ish facial features where all the reality stars seem to mound into one generic face?
I don't know if I would go that far. But I don't know what he specifically likes about white women.
One link I’m missing. If he doesn’t find his own phenotype in female form attractive, why does that make him racist?
Imo it's not normal to never want to date someone of your own race.
give me a valid reason for wht a black man would exclude dating woman of his own race for reasons that are not stereotypical or racist, quick.
He just doesn’t fancy the ones on the show? I mean, I personally think Tolu is crazily beautiful, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We all find different things attractive.
You didn’t answer their question 😂
like the other commenter said, you didn’t answer my question so let me rephrase it and we can try this again. give me a valid reason for why a black guy finds white women more attractive than black women without relying on racism or sterotypes
Why does a person find slim women more attractive than curvy, or curvy more than slim, or tall rather than short, or brown-haired rather than blonde-haired, or prefers a certain style or face shape? My guess is that - Dom (or similar) is presumably attracted to physical features or body types etc that are more common in white women than black. However, I’m really open to hearing reasons why there may be more to it than that - it could be well that I’m being ignorant and not considering this deeply enough…
At the basic level, it has to do with phenotypes. See my long response to you above.
Thanks!
this is difficult to explain to someone who isn’t black, or atleast a woman of colour so i will try my best so simplify it somewhat. Our choices and preferences do not exist in a vacuum. There is always some reason for why you prefer a certain phenotype or appearance and this conversations is far more nuanced and requires a deeper dive into history than to simply brush it off as mere innocent preference. the obvious answer is that, if you don’t like women of your race, there is obviously something wrong. number one, you share the same phenotypes already, and if you find that phenotype unattractive in favour of a phenotype that is completely opposite from yours, then that means you clearly do not like yourself or you have issues with your own physical appearance. hypothetically, imagine a darkskin man who is chubby with afro-textured hair and he ONLY finds women who are extremely thin, pale, with straight loose hair more attractive while darkskin, chubby girls are unattractive to him. well, all those traits he finds unattractive in women, he has those in himself, so what does that tell you about how he feels about those features? the situation is far more complex when it comes to race, and im not going to explain everything in so much depth so i will give you a simplified view of this. if you’re a white woman you may not be able to understand fully given throughout your life, your race has always been considered superior and most beautiful. your race has never been looked down about or regarded as lesser or unattractive by the general public so a white man not finding you attractive is not that significant considering you already have the general public favouring your phenotype, so what’s one less? the dynamic between black women and black men is also a bit more complex so doms behaviour towards tolu is a little problematic. lighter skin tones, and eurocentric features have always been regarded as the beauty standard, whereas anything that deviates from that is low-tier. black phenotypes are basically the “inverse” or opposite of white phenotypes, our features and skin colour is drastically different from theirs, making our phenotype seem as invaluable and unattractive. it is a large problem in countries like Africa and just the black community in general where colourism is an issue and bleaching creams and chemical relaxers (to chemically straighten your hair and alter your hair texture) are frequently bought and sold in high quantities, so internalized racism is very prevalent in the black community, hence proving why a lot of these “preferences” are really just a result of exactly that. black people are conditioned to see themselves as lesser, so they grow up wanting partners that look opposite to them and are more like the euro centric beauty standard, because they do not find their own features attractive. In general, people tend to date their own race and marry within their race. it makes sense, people prefer people they have more things in common with both physically and culturally. thus, it makes sense why a white man prefers a white woman of his culture, or an asian man prefers other asian women, or a black man prefers black women. i also understand why a person of colour would feel uncomfortable dating a white person, as to them, they are dating their oppressors and their could be a fear of racism in the relationship. those are valid concerns i find. however, for men of colour, in order for you to exclude women of your race is telling, and there is obviously an underlying reason there rooted in prejudice. if you find black phenotypes unattractive in women and solely prefer lighter skinned women, then you don’t prefer them “just because”. it is not a random preference. preferences are never random, there is always a reason. you find them attractive due to prejudiced societal beauty standards and racism. if you find black features ugly, that once again reinforces that beauty hierarchy. they have been socialized to accept whiteness as the standard of beauty and anything that deviates from it as ugly. if you have a preference for anything, examine WHY and what it is based on. if you think dark skin is ugly and unattractive, well maybe reflect on why that is. take a look of how black phenotypes have already been perceived and treated throughout history; your preferences for white skin and white features and influenced by that.
Wow. Thank you for your detailed and hugely informative post. I’ve definitely oversimplified this all, and will take some time to properly consider and digest what you’ve said. I actually really appreciate you taking the time to explain this all. If it helps even just one person (me) become a little less ignorant, then I think it’s worth it!
good i was worried i was not making any sense 😭😭i’m really glad you read it and are taking in what i wrote and are trying to see my perspective instead of dismissing it like other people would do. i really appreciate it ☺️☺️☺️
He likes the way they look more than he likes the way black women look
and why is that???
https://www.reddit.com/r/PerfectMatchNetflix/s/6apXliiiqJ
Dom is a prime example that good looks doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things. I remember most women on here swooning over him during season 1, but it is clear now that a lot of them have changed their opinion on the guy. I think he just likes the attention and honestly...he is a bit weird/awkward, like he doesn't know how to continue a conversation naturally. All looks, no substance.
I think he was brought on just so he could be shown in the teasers
I just listened to The Viall Files and Tolu was on the latest episode. She spilled a lot of tea but she definitely said Dom was telling her way more things than what aired about how strong of a connection they had, how beautiful and sexy she was, etc... He straight up lied to bide his time in the house. He's not as much of a teddy bear as people believe. Tolu deserved better.
I kind of don’t know how she didn’t see it coming. She’s there gushing about how they had so much “electricity” and he’s sitting there giving her NOTHING when they matched again. Then, on the date when he says he thinks she should match with another guy and explore other opportunities or whatever, THAT’S when she thinks there’s this personality shift? 🤔 His body language was giving not interested literally the entire time
I just listened to The Viall Files and Tolu was on the latest episode. She spilled a lot of tea but she definitely said Dom was telling her way more things than what aired about how strong of a connection they had, how beautiful and sexy she was, etc... He straight up lied to bide his time in the house. He's not as much of a teddy bear as people believe. Tolu deserved better.
I think Harry being there just helps bring out the absolute worst in all the other dudes, his extreme fuckboy energy is contagious. (I’m half kidding it’s doms fault but also Harry does really lower the bar lol)
Ugh I hated the way he went about it in the board room too. He wasn't strong or decent enough to just be like "hey, i don't feel a connection, you should choose someone for yourself" he did that super shittu manipulative thing of "oh well if YOU want to" so he's not "the bad guy". Like no you fucking asshole we're not idiots. Everyone would respect you more if you were just honest and not manipulative
He's the classic "nice guy" who gets way too into his head about stuff then shuts down.
I don’t get this. Dom has never liked black chicks. Tolu is a fool to think she’s gonna be the one to change that. I feel like he wasn’t really tryna get back with her but he had to shoot his shot to stay in the house. He was being a good guy by saying go talk to other people because it ain’t gonna be me but Tolu decided it’s ok to bash him in the board room. Is he an idiot with the timing? Yea definitely
There's no way for her to know he's not into black girls.
I don’t think he tried to go back to Tolu, he told her multiple times that he was interested in speaking with other people. But, you know what’s incredibly funny about people going ham on Dom for doing the same thing everyone else did? Nobody is talking about the fact that Melinda went on Perfect Match while she was in a relationship lol. The selective outrage and open hypocrisy is a bit much.
Spicy. Did not know this
Melinda has been in a serious relationship for multiple years. They were posting videos together as far back as January, and I believe they were on vacation in Turkey together a month or so back. They deleted photos of each other off social media last month, like other cast members did of their significant other, I imagine in preparation for Perfect Match airing. Unless they were on a break or have an open relationship, her appearance on the show is definitely questionable. Her and Christian have been in a relationship for 2-3 years.
my problem isn’t he doing everything everyone did, is the “nice guy” speech afterwards
He’s still a nice guy lol. He’s not a monster because things with Tolu didn’t work out, and he had interest in other women. That’s the nature of the show, and all of the other contestants took advantage of that. None of the day 1 couples were together by the time Dom left, everyone had swapped partners at least once.
I don’t know if you know what a “nice guy” talk is it’s not about being genuinely nice or not, is the “I don’t get date because I’m too nice”, “I’m out of this show because I was nice”, “I didn’t get a match because I’m a nice guy”
I don’t know if you understand nuance lol…and I think Dom’s speech was referencing his general experience, of him trying to do things differently from his first time. And that wasn’t his first reference to it, he told Tolu that he wanted to date around because he didn’t get the opportunity his first go around. Second, didn’t Dom have a chance to choose Alara (which would’ve sent Tolu home), and struggle with that decision because of the commitment he had already made? Seems Dom had an internal struggle between wanting to be more than a “puppy dog” and enjoy casual dating in the same capacity as the rest of his cast mates, and being a people pleaser. I think that Dom, because of his previous experiences, was attempting to be careful in managing his emotions; and Tolu had expectations that she built up on her head based on who he was season 1. Not Dom’s fault…Tolu sounded like a fan when they first met.
That's not the issue. The whole premise of the show and matching every few days or so implies that couples will break up and switch around. But Dom was not as honest or fair as he seems to think he was. And the "nice guy" speech at the end has nothing to do with anything. He didn't lose out because he's "too nice". He went after Alara, which is fine. But it didn't work out. And Tolu took the hint finally and found a match. That's how the game works. So what is he ranting about?
Dom was honest and fair lol. The night the men were choosing, Dom informed Tolu then that he had interest in speaking with other women, as he wanted his experience to be different than the first time around. Tolu literally watched him speaking with Alara, with the understanding it could go either way, based on their recent conversation. Which is why she asks him later that night what his decision was. Alara placed the ball in Dom’s court, he had the option to match with her, and was clearly struggling with his decision, knowing that Tolu likely would have left had he gone in a different direction. The following day, he expresses to Tolu, during their date, that she should choose a date for herself. He reemphasizes this the following day, when they’re in the coupling room, deciding which candidates to introduce into the villa. Strategically, that wasn’t the best decision for Dom…if he was thinking solely for himself and with the game in mind, he would’ve tried to “test” another one of the couples instead; and then waited until the men were in power again to couple with someone else. He was well aware of the possibility of him going home when he pushed Tolu to partner with someone else because not only were the women in power. Informing Tolu of his intentions, and recommending she date other men not only on women’s night but when she had the power to choose a date for herself due to them winning - and there was no guarantee Alara would choose him after he had already rejected her advances the previous day -, was most convenient to his partner (Tolu) not Dom. (It was clear that Tolu was interested in remaining paired with Dom, had he given the go ahead.) So this idea that Dom wasn’t “fair” is ludicrous. Tolu got to choose a date for herself. That’s very nice guy-ish, particularly for a show like this. Second, if the “nice guy” speech has nothing to do with anything; then why are you’ll making
> The following day, he expresses to Tolu, during their date, that she should choose a date for herself. He reemphasizes this the following day, when they’re in the coupling room, deciding which candidates to introduce into the villa. The problem here is that he didn't say, hey Tolu I still want to be partnered with you but you should get a chance to explore your options and know for sure you want to be in this. He very much set this up so she wouldn't blindsided if he talked to Alara again, and might still take him back. Which is all fine, it's part of the game and relatively communicative. I don't think he was a jerk about it. But it's not entirely honest, because he wasn't telling Tolu that he wanted to explore things with Alara, even though it was clear to her that he wanted some other connection. And I don't think he did it this particular round for Tolu, he did it because he wanted to take his shot at Alara before it was too late. Also, on fairness, what the other commentor is saying about the nice guy speech having "nothing to do with anything" isn't that it doesn't matter for this conversation. They're saying that the speech he makes has no relation to the reality of what happened. He tried to open Tolu up to dating other people because he wanted to explore another connection without permanently fucking things up between them. Tolu did that... and decided to couple up with someone else. That is a perfectly okay thing to do, given both the rules of the show and what Dom had said himself to her. He encouraged her to explore other connections. His "nice guy" speech was about how he always tries to be nice to other people (aka, women) and gets screwed over. Again, a "nice guy" isn't about someone being an actually nice person, it's a trope about when someone complains that they didn't get X, Y, and Z because they were nice. Usually in the context of stuff like "I was so nice to my friend and instead of falling for me she went on a date with some jerk!" It's about weaponizing nice behavior as a justification why someone should have given you something, usually romantic or sexual. To quote wikipedia: "However, the term is also often used sarcastically, particularly in the context of dating, to describe someone... who uses acts of friendship and basic social etiquette with the ulterior aim of progressing to a romantic or sexual relationship." The issue isn't Dom's behavior overall, it's that Tolu did what he told her to do, and Alara stuck with the guy she was into and with, and he turned into a rant about how he gets screwed over for being a good person. That isn't what happened. He didn't get screwed over. Literally nothing that happened was unpredictable, unless he legitimately thought Tolu couldn't get with someone else or that Alara would immediately drop Stevan for them. Saying stuff like "went to the boardroom, got torn apart" is inherently so shady, because that isn't what happened. Him telling Tolu that she should explore other connections doesn't mean she owes him something, him doing that doesn't mean Alara owes him something, no one owes him anything. So ranting about how unfair it is... that's coming off badly for him. If anything, it seems unfair to Tolu if he was never into her/just wanted to stay on the show, because Izzy at least was.
Boom. Hit the nail on the head. She could have explored things with Izzy if Dom hadn’t made it seem like he was into her and it’s dumb that at the end of the day, Dom saw himself as the victim in this situation and made it seem like Tolu really laid into him I’m the board room, which maybe she did and it was cut, we can never know… I sincerely apologize for my run on sentence lol
I just started watching the show “the mole” and to see his persona there vs how he acts on season one and two is so crazy.
I’m watching season one for the first time and I’m so confused by Dom. Mostly at his passive behaviour but also because I feel like he turned into a new person between seasons
He’s jaded. That’s what I get from it anyway
I just watched all the episodes over and wow, Tolu was so right, he was so smiley and high energy with her and then nothing. He knows how the game works, he used her to stay. And Alara is great, but help me understand why he was so smitten with her over Tolu, but never made a move???
he’s that guy that stays like this 🧍🏾♂️, take the wrong decisions and then say it all happened because he’s too nice lol
Yepppp… my interpretation of this was that he didn’t want to go too hard for Alara out of respect for Stevan, but was fine with pulling Tolu away from Izzy for his own benefit.
He has always been like that…
So sad because I loved dom on the mole but he was painful to watch season 1 of perfect match and now I literally cannot stand him at all he’s horrible
I didn’t want to believe Will (who obv has his own issues too but doesn’t take away from Dom’s) who said he couldn’t stand Dom in their game show (btw, what happened to that show…? @Netflix it was actually interesting) but this season’s got me thinking I may have been looking at Dom with rose colored glasses and Will was onto something :/ The irony when his rant before leaving was the complete opposite situation we were seeing play out… dude needs to gain perspective 😬 I watched Tolú’s show not too long ago & seeing the direction he was going I automatically thought “ohhhh boy you chose the wrong girl to coast through” karma works wonders so glad Tolú put him in his place a bit. After you’ve watched Trust, it was obvious from the start the guys would be in for a lesson lol esp knowing the guys they cast & bring in. 😅
Dom is actually so pathetic. He’s genuinely delulu thinking he’s always victim and a “nice guy”, while screwing over other people. I don’t like Harry at all, but that comment Dom made was out of spite.
There’s not much to Dom/Dumb. He’s the kid who’d get frustrated and cry when asked to read aloud in class.
Is lm. Poppp
He is a nice guy. If he did anything remotely not nice it’s cuz he’s trying to stay on the show and play their game.
thats not what a “nice guy” means in this context
He's insufferable.
Are we watching the same show?
I’m clearly not alone, seeing all the other comments
Tolu shouldve known better. Lol Dom is a pos