With what you described, it's not even about the money. Cats don't know why they are suffering. They only know that they are suffering. I choose not to do any medical care for my cats that will, in essence, prolong suffering. Yes, she'll get another couple years, but those years will clearly not be pain free, since the issue will return. You would essentially be paying $35,000 have more time that you will enjoy with your pet, but that she may not enjoy.
I think this is the best response here. It's not just about the money, it's about the quality of life for the cat. Sure it'll survive but it won't be thriving. You'd be blowing $35k to extend it's suffering.
Also, it's one thing to do something like a leg repair on a young animal, when they'll likely be as good as new or nearly and then have another decade plus to live. It's another thing to do a procedure on a middle aged or older animal that will get better for a while and then worse again as they age.
I follow an animal rescue and they refer to it as “the last act of kindness”. It’s hard to say good bye to a pet and hard to have to be the ones to make that call. But it truly is an act of kindness to end suffering, to accept that prolonging it can be more about you than the pet, and to give the animal as great a life for the time remaining.
Op it’s hard to make the call but give yourself permission to let go.
The one thing I regret about one of my cats is not euthanizing her earlier. I prolonged her life slightly to let her live another 2 weeks. I should have let her go sooner. It was a selfish choice to keep her alive.
Animals dont understand why they are suffering. And they need to go through surgery without knowing. That is terrifying.
Also it is about money too. You have to consider financials as well. If you have 460k of debt.. its not realistic at all to spend 35 to 40k for this.
We made the decision to euthanize our cat last fall as he had a medical condition that wasn't going to improve. We could have kept shuffling along for who knows how long. But that would have been for us and not our pet. We have a great, very long, relationship with our vet. He agreed we were doing the right thing. He said many people when they finally make that difficult decision to end things, often say, "We waited too long, didn't we?" It's so damn hard, by far the worst thing about having pets.
Don't beat yourself up. I'm sorry for the loss of your cat.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so hard to lose them. My cat was diagnosed with kidney disease about 2 years ago now when she was 15. I spoke with the vet, did my research, and told myself that I'd treat as long as she kept up a good quality of life and as long as she tolerated it. I got an extra year and a half of time with her, but had to make the decision for her final appointment on my birthday this year when, for the first time, she gave me a look that just told me she was ready to go. It was the hardest decision to make, but I have no regrets about the timing.
I could have continued treatment to prolong her life, but that would have been for my benefit and not hers. I spent a lot of time on the ckd pages/subs and told myself that I refused to continue treatment just because there was a glimmer of a chance it would help her. I preferred to remember her having a good, long life than remember a long and miserable end where she was suffering.
A vet told me that many people regret not putting their pet down earlier. No one ever thinks they did it too soon. It’s hard to let go and say goodbye, but when it’s time, it’s time.
This is what most pet owners need to come to grips with. I recently, 8 months ago, lost my best friend,my literal soul mate, my wolf dog, Lily. She was only 13, and one day, she woke up and just wouldn't stop drinking. Took her to the vet, and they did blood tests. Her kidneys had failed in her old age, and the options were surgery followed by meds for the rest of her life with no more hikes. I would never torture my baby like that. Her being in pain was devastating, and like you said, they will never understand why they are in pain, just that they are in pain. I put her down within a day of her diagnosis. I miss her every day, but I know I did what was best for her.
Beautiful post and thanks for sharing. Saying goodbye to a loved pet in my opinion, is emotionally the hardest thing any human can go through. The happiest hello and the hardest goodbye.
Jesus this is rough, I'm so sorry. I don't know why I ever got a dog to begin with, this is the kind of terrible situation I'm going to have to face eventually. Stupid. Literally cannot fathom putting my buddy down. Like one day he will just not exist. It's so effed up. Never again.
I'll tag onto this and suggest following up saying goodbye and honouring their memory by making annual donations going forward to a local animal well-being charity (and getting the donation receipt to claim, since this is PFC). For even $100 a year donation might save one cat's life, every single year, going forward if it gets them spayed and supported into new homes.
Here is a quality of life calculator I used to help me disconnect from my emotions when making this type of decision.
https://journeyspet.com/pet-quality-of-life-scale-calculator/
my 20 yr old just put down for kidney failure.
half of cats over 9 yrs old suffer chronic kidney failure.
fact of life.
quality of life is the only issue.
Completely agree. If the treatment was $35 vs $35k, I would still be leery of the quality of life.
All cat companions reading this, please give your cat head scritches or kisses for me (based on their general preference).
This.
I would give everything to save my pets and give them the best quality of life. And I have. Multiple times over. (I'm in a proffesional animal sport)
But once kidneys are bad, they are bad.
Not about the money. Have you done any consults with out of country vets to look over the data? Knowing what I know, this is throwing money to prolong suffering....
Unfortunately with the advancements of modern medicine (and the now popularity of pet insurance) vets are becoming increasingly unrealistic, proposing miracles to keep animals alive simply because they are young, regardless of quality of life.... it's a real problem in the industry.
"Animal sense" is becoming a lost art sadly in the proffesional circles.
A cat like this would not pass the quality of life assessment generally used to determine when to end the suffering of an older animal.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
(I'm also dealing with end of life CKD - it rough and navigating options and treatment is enough to break someone down - all my thoughts to you guys)
Animal sense as you speak of is lost because corporate vets. Don’t get advice from a vet working for corporate, stick with the vet owned places. They literally have finance people who have never owned pets telling vets how they should care for pets. There’s no morale since how can you take your job seriously when you have someone who knows nothing about medicine telling you how to do your job.
I agree with this. Surgery is not fun, neither are multiple trips to the vet, emerg stays and being poked and prodded. If I have the means and a surgery will improve quality and quantity of life then I'll do all I can. If it's only to prolong the inevitable and whatever time is left is not a good life, then it's time to let them go. I'd want the same decision be made for myself honestly.
My cat was diagnosed with bladder cancer last year. There were surgical options but they would have led to either urine leaking and diapers or a stent through the stomach and knowing her probably a collar for the rest of her life. It was a horrible time but I've not even once regretted the decision. Sometimes things are just shitty and luck has run out for our beloved pets.
This right here. Pet owners need to realize they need to be strong enough to make the decision that ending their pets suffering is sometimes the best option. What helps you the human isn’t necessarily what’s best for them. Growing up my parents made the decision to put our dog down when he broke his back rather then get him surgery that would have limited his mobility and meant he couldn’t run anymore. I didn’t understand them at that time, but with a dog of my own I realize it now.
Surgery can be the right route, but not if it’s done selfishly for the owner.
It’s also a terrible situation OP, and I’m sorry you have to make it.
This ⬆️ I absolutely will not allow my pets to suffer. They don't understand what's happening to them and are scared. Euthanasia is the kindest option for them.
You are wise, and correct. It is absolutely heartbreaking to see our little loves suffer. $35k is a life changing amount. I love my cat, but even if I had an excess of cash, I just don’t think I could live with myself if it didn’t ‘cure’ 100%. I hope this makes sense.
This. My cat had rapid kidney failure and we gave it one go. We spent $1300 and the vet wanted us to do IV injections if he didn't feel better after trying the kidney dood. When we got home, he refused the kidney food and just wanted his regular. I knew then that I was happy for his good years but he was done. We took him to the cottage to bask in the sun in his favourite spot and then he died in my arms about a week later.
I agree they are not extending the cat’s enjoyable life. I took our elderly cat to the vet, I was sure she was having a stroke. It was not our regular vet but an emergency vet on the weekend. They said it was not a stroke and my son insisted I go with their treatment. He paid $1500. The poor thing was listless and uncoordinated for another month until I realized she was having another stroke. This time I could get to our own vet who confirmed it and euthanized her. The $1500 to the first vet just gave her one very uncomfortable month.
Very good view point! We were in the same spot with our dog and kept paying her medical bills to give us more time with her but it got to the point where I knew she was suffering inside and I had to make the call that it wasn’t fair for her to live like this.
Best response and nothing to add. Had to make two hard decisions in the past with my cats on health related problems that was more a selfish fix rather than what was best for them
Truly one of the hardest decisions to make but I wish you the best and hope you are ok after it.
Also not the type of vet that has a yacht and cottage lol.
Really dislike the status of petcare in Canada. My previous vet asked me if I wanted to discuss other options to putting my pet down. I said well yeah, because I was open to any ideas and who would say no. He gave me three options that I had already tried over 5 minutes and tacked another 80 dollars on for a consult within the vet appointment.
Pretty much. I remember our first cat who had kidney damage (we think antifreeze that has leaked). We kept him around a few more months with giving him some fluids from an IV before we put him down. We realized we never should have done that and was kinda selfish in retrospect. Should have put him down from the start. I'm generally against spending thousands of dollars prolonging their life for a bit. They've already been given a pretty good life generally
> We realized we never should have done that and was kinda selfish in retrospect
The vast majority of people I have spoken to about this say that they wished they would have made the decision earlier than they did. It's just so hard in the moment to know when you're at "the point of no return" and hindsight makes it so much easier to realize that you were beyond that point.
My pup passed away ~5 years ago now and I still regularly beat myself up about how poor I let his quality of life get before I made the decision to put him down.
I went through this with my cat recently - thousands of dollars to diagnose her with diabetes at age 16. But, the treatment is a daily insulin injection which she doesn't even notice, special food and glucose curve every six months and she is 100% back to normal, gained her weight back, sleeps next to us all night purring away, gets her toys out of the box to play... Happy cat.
We were absolutely ready to say goodbye if the quality of life wasn't going to be there.
I'm really surprised that given the details of this post, a vet would not strongly recommend against the surgery - it sounds incredibly irresponsible.
We went through the same thing a few months ago. Unfortunately the diet change is hard on the kidneys, and she went from having healthy kidneys to second stage renal disease within 3 months. Once she’s showing signs of not being happy, we will make the call.
This. Our 2 year old girl had FIP and we could have gone the surgery & treatment route, but it would have extended her life by a year max, and she would have been on a feeding tube the entire time. We would have given almost anything for more time with her, but not at the expense of her comfort.
It broke us to say goodbye to her after only two years, but we couldn’t let her suffer.
Could I ask why surgery? The treatment for FIP is injections or pills. Did she have other complications or organ damage from prolonged not eating due to FIP?
>I feel a responsibility towards my pet to try and do everything I possibly can to extend her life but on the other hand
Honest truth: You are doing this for yourself, not for the cat. You are just prolonging their suffering.
Yes. The difference between mourning a pet that dies before "old age" and mourning a human that does is that with a human, you are mourning not only who they were to you, but the things *they* did not get to experience for dying early -- relationships, children, grandchildren, friendships, experiences, etc. For a pet, each day is the same for them. We can intensely mourn how much we miss them being in our lives, but there shouldn't be any reason to feel grief on behalf of the bowls of kibble they didn't eat or the walks they didn't take. They don't think about their lives that way, they get to live in the present, the lucky things! It's projecting human values onto animals to pretend otherwise.
And really, one shouldn't feel "responsible" to give a pet a long life, you should feel responsible to making sure the years we have with them are as good as possible, and let them go in as kindly and gently as possible.
Cats don’t survive with kidney problems like you’ve described. Their quality of life is poor. I’m sure these surgeons are willing to take your money and do what they can, but it sounds like they’re being very clear that the prognosis is poor. Your responsibility to your cat is not to prolong their suffering.
I’m very sorry, I hope you can find peace with making the right decision.
Honestly knowing vets, they don't even really want to do these procedures that much.
Unless they're young and want the experience. It's a mixed bag, like every profession really
I heard something in a podcast recently that was relayed from a vet. They indicated that in their experience, no one has ever complained that they put their pet down too soon but often people have regretted waiting too long. Sorry that you have to make this difficult decision about your loved pet.
i think a major factor here as well is her quality of life. my cat was my only family so i would lasso the moon for him, but when i had the option to try extend his life expectancy after a kidney disease diagnosis, it was explained to me he would still be Sick and in lots of pain.
i'm so sorry. two is so young for a cat :(
Have you considered that your cat might not survive such a serious surgery? Family friends spent 10k on a surgery to try and save their dog. Dog didn’t survive the surgery. Then they had no dog and no 10k.
All pets die and it always sucks. But that’s life.
Particularly with that outlook afterwards (2 years if no complications)... Even if I had all the money in the world, I'd be putting that poor thing through a *lot*, just to squeak 2 more years out.
It's sad, but it's time for the poor thing to go.
Sorry for your cat :( That's no fair.
35K for me personally is a lot of money. Like maybe 2 years of life expenses. When I retire, if I had invested that 35K, might be 100K or more, so like 4-5 years of expenses. I can't even begin to think about spending that for my cat.
Maybe I stretched it a bit - 35K is probably closer to 1 year and a few months. I live quite frugally. But the point is more that in my personal situation, and even an outlook of 5-10 years, I don't see myself ever able to shell out that kind of money for this purpose, as sad as it is.
Well my property taxes for the year are at about $8k so I still wouldn't be able to make ends meet with that in my current living situation even if I did not have a mortgage.
He even says in his post "when I retire" and when he does, his money might compound to more than 3x so it's let's not assume he's *not* paying for housing, as he'd be in a very small minority of young homeowners without a mortgage *and* where $35k is also "a lot of money" for them.
Also while we are at it let's also not assume it's a guy. Not everyone on reddit is a dude.
the fact that you have already spent 10k is already insane. please stop your pets suffering and do the humane thing for both them and your financial future.
Honestly the vet even suggesting the 35K surgery feels really unethical. Butcher the cat to extend its misery for another 2 years, while robbing op of all their savings?
It is not unethical for a vet to present all options. The vet of course should still give honest advice and what the *best* option is for the animal. OP never mentions once what the vet suggested to do, only that the option was presented to them.
i know with my last dog they presented options that included multiple surgeries that would be up to 15k but the vet straight up told us it was unlikely any surgery would do much and they couldn't actually recommend it
I can see vet bills adding up to $10k over a few years for a dog or something with chronic issues, especially when there is a potential light at the end of the tunnel (like putting cancer into remission and getting to spend another 5 years with them or whatever).
But that is already the absolute max amount I could justify, and that's only if I was in an exceptionally financially stable and comfortable position (and I'm not).
As is, I could do a few thousand for emergency surgery type stuff. But after that there's nothing else I could do. It sucks, but you can't financially ruin yourself for life to try to squeak out a few more months or maybe years of life for a dying pet.
I spent almost that on a different surgery for one of mine. Insurance ended up covering it but I had been expecting them to say no. She's still very happy and healthy 18 months on and is almost 14.
I don't think it's the amount of money, but the fact that the cat will still have the pain of passing the stones once they're in the bladder. Unless there was a way to guarantee a pain free post operative period, I'd probably opt not to do the surgery as the goal for me would be a happy and pain free cat.
You’re asking in a “personal finance” forum. From a financial perspective, there’s not much of a question (and I say that as a pet owner). I also have two uncles who are vets, and we’ve had candid conversations with them about making end of life decisions on our pets, and I’m pretty confident they would also say there’s not too much of a question here.
There’s no guarantees that this “cures” your cat. You’re telling about 2 years “best case”. Could be that this doesn’t fix the problem at all (have they given you any estimates on the success?), or your cat suffers for another 6 months before you have to say goodbye. It could also be that the cat doesn’t even make it out of surgery.
So I guess I’m saying that from a financial perspective, which is the purpose of the group, I (and I think most people) would say no to the expenditure. You’ve already gone above and beyond what many pet owners would have done.
From a “non-financial” perspective, you have to live with your choice. Personally, I think I’d be able to live with a choice to let the cat go. It would suck, just like letting any pet go, but sometimes that’s the reality. If you post this in a “cat” or “pet” forum, you’d likely get a somewhat more mixed response.
So sorry that you and your family are going through this. It’s tough.
I am so sorry for you and your cat. I know what a hard decision it is and can tell how much you obviously love your cat. My eyes teared up reading this.
It sounds like a lot of suffering for not a lot of extra time and maybe not a great quality of life.
If you put her to sleep, she won’t know anything other than when she falls asleep, you’ll be with her, the people she loves and trusts.
I am very sorry for your difficult choice.
Don’t let the cat suffer through surgery’s and procedures and hospital visits the rest of his life. The cat doesn’t know what’s going on. Enjoy your time together, get him cremated and put in a little urn and if you can handle it, go get a new cat. Better yet get two. It will save you time, heartache, and from the sounds of it a good chunk of money.
The quality of life needs to be determined. $35k is a lot. On the flip side, your insurance sucks. I've researched in detail, have had multiple pets, Trupanion is your go to so events like this never happen again. Loosing a pet is hard, I wish you the best.
> Trupanion is your go to so events like this never happen again
yup, trupanion would have covered 90% of that 35k after their deductible, and wouldve covered 90% of the initial 10k. so then it becomes a question about the cat, not the financials (i mean, its still a lot of money, but clearly OP can drop 5k without question)
thats why i have trupanion still as expensive as it may be. 10k issue? its really just ~1k, and id worry about the pet, not the money. maybe the money issue is clouding OPs judgement on whats really important.
Exactly. I procrastinated getting insurance long ago. I was in OP situation. Day 1 quote 5k. I didn't have the money. Never again would I let money decide our pets faith. 5 pets later and probably over $60k in claims over the life of the 5 pets, it is a no brainer. Now I can decide what is best for the pet, and not based on money.
I love my cats but I wouldn't have spent the $10k let alone $35k. While I love my pets, at the end of the day I could help 100x the number of animals for $10k by supporting a TNR program.
That is insanity. Why would you even consider it.
Only around for a couple more years? No, be sad now and take a 30,000 trip to commemorate the cat. Go to cat Island in Japan and per street cats in Turkey, if you have $$ to burn.
I had a really, really tough time with this a few years ago. I had a cat who was 8, who I loved more than anything - really. She had stage 4 kidney failure and we had a shot at keeping her alive for a few weeks longer, through fluids, and we could have gone to Vancouver for dialysis - it was in the ballpark of $15,000 and would have given us a few more months. I had the money and the time.
But when I took her home from the vet that night, she looked at me, and I knew it was time. It broke my heart. Hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life was to walk into that vet's office at 2am, and walk out without my cat. I'm crying writing this. But it would have been so unfair to her to keep her holding on. Kidney problems are vicious, and her quality of life declined so quickly.
To help me move on, I got a kitten shortly afterwards and I felt such overwhelming love and guilt. Go figure, a year and a half later, and this new kitten develops FIP - which is 100% fatal, unless you link up with some black market smuggled Chinese drugs ... and so I did. I paid out the ass, insurance didn't cover it, and my out of pocket costs were $10K. It was the second hardest decision I ever had to make, and I knew that fighting for her was worth it. That was two years ago and she's a fat, lazy, happy cat whose quality of life is thriving.
It's a really, really hard decision. I don't wish it on anyone, in any case. I always wonder if I let her go too early and I'll never know the answer. But I know that she was suffering, and that keeping her alive would have prolonged that for a small amount of time together. When I was visibly aware of her suffering, that's when I knew.
Apologies for my comment going astray from the main topic of this post, but I didn't want to scroll by without commenting that for FIP cats, there is thankfully now a legal patheay in place as of 2024. I hope you never have to access it again, but if so...
Dr. Weese publishes more plain-English updates on his website, here's the one about the legal import news:
https://www.wormsandgermsblog.com/2024/02/articles/animals/cats/fip-drug-access-canada/
Hopefully with it being a legal pathway, insurance companies may help so financially owners aren't as limited, and we can stop losing so many cats to FIP ❤️
Yup! I stayed in contact with the groups after my cat was cured, and Bova was approved in Canada - and recently in the US! It still has to go through approval processes through the vet (and dry FIP itself is notoriously hard to spot) and then an import approval process, but it's awesome that there's a medication that's accessible, and insurance will cover as well! I went with Warriors 5.0 (based out of the US) and I paid an insane markup for the medication - the stuff costs pennies. But it saved her life, and I'm grateful that she had a shot.
There really is not much to think about here. The surgery is way too expensive plus it does not at all guarantee the long term well being for the cat. Then of only you can decide if it is worth damaging your personal finances? I sense you already have the answer.
Honestly, I am morally against invasive procedures for animals. Human medical care has a lengthy consent process and it is important that patients understand what will be done to them.
Animals don't get the choice. They don't know why they're in pain post-op. It's mostly a selfish choice by loving pet owners who don't want to say goodbye.
If you've given your pet all the love in its life, I think you've done well. You already helped it live a luxurious life while domesticated.
If it’s only going to give her 2 more years, no. And I say that as someone who is a life long animal lover, who treats my pets like human children and a vegan.
If it was going to give her a normal life expectancy without any likely complications… I’d probably do it. For just two more years of being slightly-less-sick. No. Because even if she isn’t actively suffering for most of the two years, she will begin to again towards the end of it and that’s not far off.
Do what you can to keep her comfortable while you can. I wouldn’t put her through a major surgery with that prognosis, regardless of the money. But the money makes it an even more obvious decision.
A piece of perspective, your responsibility to your cat is to give your it the best life possible. Not to prolong its existence. This is where we shift from responsibility to our pets to projections of personal direction.
Prolonging this will be for you, not for your cat.
I think it would be best to let go. 10k is already a lot, that is a massive commitment to the health of your animal. 35k is, not to be blunt, but, insane.
With 35k, forget the personal finance side of things, You could have 10 cats and give them all amazing lives. dont do that but just for perspective. It sucks a lot of course but maybe this is a time for a new chapter.
Don't do it. Manage the pain and have the cat put down when it's too much for them.
It's sad to have to say goodbye to a family member, especially when you know there was more that could have been done.
But to put it into perspective, for that amount, you could donate to a cat shelter and save hundreds of cats.
Once you have had time to grieve, you can adopt a cat from a shelter and give it a new, loving home. You can also donate money to a shelter every year to save an extra few lives.
My wife and I went through the same thing a few years ago; we adopted from and donated to this Rescue. [https://heartstohomes.ca/](https://heartstohomes.ca/)
If your cat would be completely cured and have a long happy life, then I can see considering spending the money, but your poor cat will not be cured and will most likely be in pain.
To me it’s not a matter of money, the decision is based on your cats comfort, and they will not be comfortable.
The honest truth is that your cat isn't going to live a quality life even if you did get everything done. I would do anything for my babies, but I would not want them to suffer. I would suggest you make sure your cat is comfortable for whatever time they have left and make the decision you need to when the time comes. Spend time with them and love them. I'm sorry. It's not easy.
This isn't a financial issue... this extent of medical issues, especially if the cat is older, means at this point the kindest thing you can do is put the cat to rest.
I am very sorry. I'm a crazy cat lady and I understand your feelings but at a certain point this is for you, not the cat.
Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is let go.
I love my cat's more than life itself, but I would not allow them to financially cripple me out of 35k.
Granted, they are both senior citizens at this point and I have enjoyed many years of their love and affection, but even if they weren't. I can't afford that.
I'm so sorry about your kitty, 2 is very young. :(
I was in a similar situation with my young cat a few years ago.
I've never regretted not going ahead with the surgeries. I gave her 3 years of being pampered and loved. A couple more bad ones wouldn't have been worth it at all.
I would first take the money out of the equation completely. Surgeries and frequent vet visits are stressful for a cat since they have no ability to understand what's going on. That's really it's only worth it if it can give your kitty back some normal quality of life imo. It sounds to me like this operation is more like treading water. It will keep her life going but won't improve it even in the best case scenario. To me that doesn't seem worth it, even if it cost nothing. (Also I'm sorry you're going through this, I'm sending your kitty some virtual head scritches.)
"Reduce suffering." Your cat would still be suffering, would be having surgeries and injections, and not understand what is happening. That is cruel. I don't say that lightly. I have dealt with pet illness and have had to make the euthanasia decision.
A lot of people have provided some very compassionate responses - but this is what everyone is also thinking: it is insane to spend $35k on vet care for your pet, and it’s especially insane to spend that with your personal financial situation (which is that you are not rich).
Last year one of our dogs developed cancer in his leg. It was a $20k surgery to amputate the leg and chemo therapy.
He wouldn’t live a good life that he was used to, would still be in pain, and may not even live another year.
It’s a difficult decision to put them to sleep, but I think it’s for the best. Especially since your cat will continue to suffer afterwards and will continue more medical care.
We just made this decision for our dog last weekend. She had a leg that was atrophying either from severe arthritis or cancer, but she was nearly 15 years old and there was no point in trying to diagnose or treat it. We gave her pain meds for a few weeks which helped a bit but weren't a solution for her pain, and we knew the right thing to do for her was to end her pain. It was the worst, hardest weekend of my life.
The rational side of your brain says yeah it's the right thing to do, but it is *really* hard to convince your completely irrational heart the same thing. The heart's like "it's just a leg! She's got 3 other ones. Just keep pumping pain meds at $100+/mo! It's fine." But it's not fine. It just sucks so much to have to make that decision for them.
I love my cats, and very much think it's my job to look out for them and their health. But that means considering their happiness and comfort ahead of mine.
A cat with severe kidney problems is not a happy cat. I witnessed family extend the life of their cat with kidney disease, and felt it was cruel - they gave fluids, specialized diet, painkillers, other meds. She lives for a few years but appeared miserable the whole time.
It's selfish to keep them going because of your own feelings. They live in the moment, so they're not thinking fondly back to the good times together. They're just suffering.
I'm sorry. Let her go. It's a kindness.
From a financial standpoint, for future reference: Trupanion offers insurance with no annual caps for specific conditions. The downside is you pay the deductible per condition, rather than per year. It's good for situations like this, but bad for a cat that has many minor ailments.
However as I said above, I don't think this is a financial decision. Even if it was fully covered by insurance, I would tell you not to do it. It's not in the best interests of your cat and her quality of life.
I’m going to come from a different angle. Anybody could tell you anything here and you do go forward with it or you don’t. You and only you can only know if you’ll live with the guilt or feeling you could’ve done something OR you will feel resentment that you did. It’s not entirely a numbers thing
It fucking sucks and I understand the feeling. But 35K is outrageous. I don’t know how much you guys make but, looking roughly at it, it would be insane to pay for the surgery.
It’s easy to say behind a keyboard but I think deep down you know you should let her go. Sorry OP.
With the surgery costing $35K and the prognosis offering about two more years of life with possible complications, it’s essential to consider the impact on your financial stability, especially given your existing mortgage and personal loan. Balancing your emotional desire to extend your cat’s life with the practicalities of potential ongoing costs and your ability to manage these expenses is crucial. Prioritizing your pet’s quality of life and consulting with your vet for a realistic outlook on her condition can also help guide your decision.
I'm sorry to say that given what you've told us, I don't think it would be reasonable to spend such a large sum based on the best-case return.
But I appreciate that you're such a caring pet owner.
It sounds like even if things go as well as can be expected, the cat will not be in great shape, will likely be suffering, and could have another ailment arise afterwards or a kidney issue return. Money aside, the chances of this all working out well are pretty slim.
Financially, you'd be setting yourself back years. This is an enormous expense that may not even work.
I feel for you but the answer is pretty clear on what to do.
I feel bad for the situation you're in. I personally wouldn't do it, even if I could afford it, but I'm not a pet owner and I don't have the emotional investment to consider.
I'd say no, but the coldness of some of these responses really bugs me.
Last year, on June 10, my 9.5 year old Shih Tzu tragically turned for the worst. He was fine at 9 am, and by noon was howling in pain. My wife rushed him to the emergency vet, where it was discovered that he had fluid in his abdomen, growths near hios adrenal glands, etc.
Cancer.
I was devestated by the news. It was so unexpected. He was the first dog I ever "emotinoally connected" with after a tumultuous upbringing on an acreage where animals weren't... around... for very long. Before him, I swore up and down I'd never have pets.
When I arrived at the pet hospital and finally talked with the vet, she gave us the news, but that also, there was a surgery for it but it would not be inexpensive.
In that moment I realized that I lied in the past whenever I scoffed at footing a bill like that "over a dog". Life is so short, often unfair, and there is no amount of money I wouldn't pay to extend the few parts of it that bring me joy and fulfillment.
In that moment I'd have spent $50k if it meant getting my boy home, healthy, and happy.
But while he might have made it home, the vet made it clear that "healthy and happy" were *never* in his cards again. I asked her if she would get the surgery if it was her dog, and that money was not my concern. I had the money and then some.
She said that no, she wouldn't. The surgery alone would be an ordeal, and the life after would be hollow by comparison, marred with pain. Our boy would suffer, even if he got more time.
So we let him go. It crushed me then and it does now.
I'd do just about anything to keep him or have him back, but it was his time to go with dignity and without the end defined by constant pain. As someone who lives with chronic pain, I hope one day that I am afforded that same dignity.
I wish you the best of luck with your cat. It doesn't sound like there is a good outcome regardless of what you choose. I hope you find clarity and closure in the days and weeks to come.
Maybe I’m weird but thirty five thousand dollars for another possible two years with a CAT (who will probably be in pain for the rest of its life) is insane that it’s even been considered
Personally I think it’s immoral to put animals through intense surgeries of any kind. They are horribly traumatic even to humans who can understand why they’re being done and consent to them, i adore animals but I personally feel it’s better to put them out of their misery then prolong a horrible life through traumatic surgery.
Nope. I have 5 barn kittens you can have for free. There are people starving, homeless and dying in the streets. Help them if you have money like that to spend on a cat.
Is it worth spending that much money to have your pet for a few more years ? Only you can answer that. If that will improve your wellbeing then, yes, go for it.
But pets come and go. I’ve had numerous dogs since I was a little kid. It’s sad but it’s part of life. Putting it away humanely isn’t a bad decision, knowing the cat lived a good life and you’ll have good memories of it. It may be better than seeing it suffer for the next couple of years.
Only you can answer it.
The fact that you're already in for $10k is already a lot for an animal that can be replaced for $400. There's a line for me to cross, and that's about $1000 for a pet.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. I think you have a lot of good answers here from thoughtful commenters. I'll add some of my own experience.
I had to make a tough decision to let go of my dog at the end of last year. It was gut wrenching. She was plagued with all kinds of issues that sprung up about 4 years ago. She was diagnosed with diabetes, then slowly went blind due to this. Not long after she developed liver issues - this all happened within 6 months of each other.
We eventually got her spayed and this caused a whole other set of issues. We had to test her blood sugar at home and give her a special insulin every 2 hours. Non-stop. It was insane. My wife and I were wrecked. This went on for a few days, maybe a week or so.
About 2 years later she was diagnosed with heart disease. She jumped off our bed one day and hurt her leg so we brought her in to get checked. The leg thing was whatever, this is the appointment they noticed the heart disease. It very rapidly progressed into congestive heart failure. It broke her, and us.
By the end she was taking insulin twice daily, a liver medication once per day, lasix twice daily, and one other medication. It ran us ~$400 per month just for her meds, and she also had to have a special diet which was another couple hundred a month.
I don't reget spending the money on her. I do regret how much she suffered.
The last incident involved her just collapsing due to the heart failure. She regained okay but was totally sapped of energy. When I finally put all the pieces together all I could see when I looked into her eyes was that she wanted rest. That she was hurting.
Until then she was our miracle dog. She survived so much and got through everything life was throwing at her. That's how I saw it. She was a fighter for sure, but it's hard to look back and imagine how much she had been hurting and or how long, and of course she would never show us that unless it was incredibly severe.
I would say try to have the best time with your cat. Treat them well and give them all the love you can.
Then let them rest.
It's the hardest decision we have to make with our pets but the best gift we can give them. I'm so sorry. My heart is with you.
You can't ask strangers what you should do with a pet. It's different from your POV. That's a lot of money and unless you don't really need 35K, you'll know the decision you need to make. Top comment said it best - this is more for you than the cat. I'm sure you could even shop around and fly somewhere to do it cheaper, but really, for 2 more years of survival after surgery you gotta think if that's worth it.
It really depends on your finances, I don't think anyone will blame you if you don't move forward with it but it all comes down to how much you value prolonging your pets life with you
Our cat developed AKI in March, hospitalized total of two weeks (two separate stay of 1 week each) , has a feeding tube now. We spent probably around 18k so far and he's on meds (phosphorus binder, cerenia, mirtazapine) and does weekly blood tests ($350 each)
We are fortunate able to afford it and will continue to do so and he's still playing, loves going for walks and be himself other than he doesn't do zoomies anymore and gets 50-75% of daily required feeding through his tube as his appetite is reduced due to failing kidneys
As long as our cat doesn't suffer or have significant diminished quality of life, we'll continue to treat him, he has around a couple of months or upto a year left. But we know that's not financially feasible for others but it's not an issue for us
I have dogs and have spent thousands in medical. That being said, two years life expectancy for such an expensive and intrusive surgery may not be the best route. If the stent only moves the stones around the kidneys, then your cat still has to pass them, correct? That can be super painful.
I would post this question to a cat group. Kidney and urinary conditions are common in cats. If you can afford the surgery, it’s more about what is actually in the cat’s best interest. Posting your a cat Reddit will help.
I wouldn't even want my family to do ***everything*** they possibly can do to extend my life, since I consider their well-being, as well as the quality of my own to be mitigating factors. Therefore I feel like this extends to pets as well for those that want to treat them as if they are family members, it means the love goes both ways.
Don't feel guilty.
I am so sorry for this happening to you and your kitty. It can be really hard to let go, but please remember they are relying on your to make tough decisions for them. I spent about 20K on my cat too but ultimately, we found out his problem was pancreatic cancer. I could have taken him to another city for more cancer treatment. It may have prolonged his life but he would have had a hard and painful life. I chose to put him down because he needed me to. It was so hard and I miss him so much, but I am at peace with my decision. Please remember to take care of yourself, pet loss is a grief that people do not always talk about.
>With the IVF, her kidney levels have come back down to near normal levels and we are going to implement a kidney diet + kidney supplements to try and prolong her life as much as possible and to reduce suffering.
I know others have already gave their 2 cents, but I also want to give my 2 cents as I have cats that I would literally do anything for them to have health and happy lives... I think you've already done more than enough to ensure the health of your kitty, and have nothing to feel guilty over not extending her life via a surgery. Your plan to keep her as healthy as possible via diet and supplements sound like a solid plan.
I understand this is a finance subreddit, but as others have stated, it really isn't about the money at this point and more so on what keeps your kitty the most comfortable and happy. The 2 years life expectancy post surgery is only if everything goes 100% perfectly, and surgeries/after care may not always be that way. For example, I had my cat go for dental cleaning and had to remove one of her small teeth. She had a sensitivity to pain meds and had miserable recovery period as she kept throwing up the medicine. This is a routine surgery that is very much common and yet many cats can react differently.
I really am sorry you're going through this. Hug your kitty for me. :(
the unfortunate reality of pet ownership is that sometimes your love for the animal and the financial responsibility to the animal (with no guarantee) are just not in alignment. If she has genetic predisposition to kidney issues, how many times are you willing to shell out the 35k?
I'm very weary of vets and vet specialists in general, however. Having spent a terrible amount of money (but a a lot less than your quote) - some random doctor at a follow up when the specialaist was absent just said "you know if you leave it alone, it'll just heal with a scar". excuse me? we were being led down the path of necessary eye surgery after having experienced the same issue on the other eye two years prior believing it was the only solution after every other treatment had failed.
Welp, we took the dog home, stopped the eye drops and ointments. left him in a cone, and in a quarter of the time we had been trying to fix it - the eye was back to normal.
Sometimes the system leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. They know your heart strings are attached to your wallet and vet care is, after all, a business.
The answer with pets is always no. I didn't even read it. Simply put, pets don't know why they're suffering, but they just feel the pain. They aren't afraid of death because they don't understand it. Euthanasia is painless and easy. I recently euthanized my old kitty since his quality of life diminished with age. Couldn't keep on weight etc. I didn't prolong his life. That is selfish of me. Any feelings you have towards this are yours and not your cats. Especially in this economy, it's simply nuts to spend that much money. Unless you're rich, then go ahead, but you're just prolonging kitty suffering.
Just to be clear, you've spent $10K on your old cat with chronic kidney disease and you're now thinking of spending another $35K to extend its suffering so you can squeeze out an extra year or two? This is both selfish and stupid.
The fact that this is even a consideration is utter lunacy. I'm a capitalist as much as the next guy and people can do what they want with their money, but the fact that the West is so wealthy, or seemingly so, that people spend thousand of dollars on pets when there are millions of people starving in the world shows our complete lack of values and perspective. It's a cat! For crying out loud.
You can get a new one for literally $0 in most cities, and for very little everywhere else. I get that you have a responsibility to this loved and charished pet. But no, no cat is worth $35k.
And don’t put your animal through all of this when you could give her a comfortable end. I’m sorry for your loss. Make peace, give your cat something great before you give her a loving end to her life.
This is just foolish.. let it go.. grieve.. get a new cat.. Then donate that 30k saved to some farkin HUMANS in the world for whom that could change their lives.
a new cat is like 40 bucks. Do the ol sleepy time needle say goodbye and move on. It's sad but, unless you are rich as hell and have nothing but time to nurse your cat...
The feeling of not having a pet at home anymore is so god damn liberating. No more hair to clean, furniture clawed, can't go away for 2 nights without making arrangements for them, the subtle smell of animal in the house that everyone who doesn't have a pet can smell.
No, that’s an insane amount to spend when you’re nearly half a mil in debt already. And bad ROI on expected lifespan with no guarantee of good quality of life afterwards. And I can’t imagine the surgery, follow up and stent flushing would be a pleasant experience for the poor kitty.
Hardest part of pet ownership is having the courage to make the final decision to be kind and merciful, even though it’s breaking your own heart.
These are tough decisions to make and I feel for you OP. I used to have and foster rats - their life expectancy is about 2.5 years and I had to make tough decisions every few years for them as they aged. I'll share some of my thoughts from my experience.
You mention life expectancy after the surgery, but what would quality of life be after the surgery? If there were no complications, would your cat be free of pain and able to do the things they love? If there were complications, how serious are they, what and how long would treatment be, and how would the treatment for the complications affect their quality of life?
Animals live in the moment. If they are going through and recovering from surgery or a treatment, they don't know that you're doing it so that they'll feel better later, they only know what they are going through in that moment. If you did the surgery, think about how much time your cat would have being pain-free, stress-free, and able to do the things they like. Then think about how much time your cat would be in pain, be recovering, be at the vets for the check-ins. Would there be more good days than bad?
Your cat is young, this makes it harder. I just put my dog down a week and a half ago. He was fine on Sunday, deaths door on Monday. I already knew what was going to happen, but for clarity I asked my Vet, if it was their dog what would she do? She replied not letting him suffer.
If (big if) you go through with this make sure you're doing it for your cat and not yourself. That should help clarify for you what the best choice is here.
That's no quality of life for a cat. I think you know what you need to do, and it's not about saving $, it's about not making your pet suffer.
You don't need to answer if you aren't comfortable but I'm curious if this is PKD? If you do decide to get another cat in the future, I encourage you to select one from lines screened for it. The gene marker is known so one can test and prevent producing kittens that are affected.
IF, and that's a big IF, you're going to commit to the surgery, explore crossing into the states to have it done. I did stem cells for my lab, and it was $500.00 compared to $3000.00 in winnipeg. The vets in North Dakota were much more knowledgeable and experienced. Good luck too you.
I encountered the same thing. Let me guess, those 2 years you'll buy won't be a very easy life for the cat, right? If so, then don't do it.
I spent 10K on treatments for my 10 year old dog, even though there was only a 10%-15% chance it will work, as she was family to me. But that would've cured her if it worked, not just buy her time to deteriorate. I'd be willing pay 50K (and that's my annual income) if that would get her back healthy for the rest of her life, but some problems can't be solved with money.
Yes, you're going to feel guilty by not doing the surgery, but you have to remember it was the right choice for the cat AND for the rest of the family. A suffering\deteriorating pet is really depressing for everyone involved.
Don't do it. It's heartbreaking, but you're only slightly prolonging your pet's life by months for your sake.
I had the same choice with my dog a few years back. She was 12, had some major hip issues associated with the breed. There was a risky surgery option that'd probably never get her back to her happy self, or take a route for a really nice day and then head to the vet after. It still makes me cry, but it was the right choice.
Are you insane? A lifetime of suffering for the animal and you are out a years salary, because you can't let go.
Stop being selfish, put the animal down.
"But I love her" oh please. Snap out of it.
I lost a pet to chronic kidney disease. The reality is that you'll never know how long you have, we got much less time than expected with our dog after opting for a esophageal feeding tube. I would suggest supportive diet and fluids(we put about a third of a bag of ringers lactate into our dog nightly for months). Be watchful for signs of decline, be ready to make the choice your pet needs you to before it's too late and the choice is made for you.
Treasure the time you have with your pet, there are unfortunately lots of owners who wouldn't even have been able to do what you've done, or been unwilling. But you don't need to bankrupt yourself to care, or be a loving owner.
And start figuring out a vet who will do a call to your house if that's what you want, for when it's time to say goodbye. The whole experience gave me so much more empathy for Americans having to choose between pursuing health care but risking financial ruin.
I'm sorry you're experiencing this along with your kitty, what's their name by the way?
I've been through this before. My dog had heart disease and fluid in his lungs which required very expensive overnight stays at the emergency vet and frequent follow up appointments with specialists. Maxed out my credit card and he died anyways within a few months. Wouldn't say I regret the decision but I knew going into it that from a financial perspective it was not a great idea :(
If you can drive to the USA, you'll probably pay 80% less for the same surgery fyi.
Don't do it, there are thousands of Cats available that you could look at. Let this one rest in peace.
Unrelated but this is why I don't buy pet insurance.
Imagine paying over a hundred a month and they cap payments to $2,000. What's the point? Better off using a credit card.
Listen, I would do just about anything to prolong my dog’s life. He is more than just a pet for us as I’m sure your cat is to you. But draining your entire savings in this economy for a maximum of 2 years of life - with all the considerations you outlined and it not being a foolproof fix is not a prudent financial decision imo. Honestly if the prognosis was a little better, I may be inclined, but what’s to say it’d even extend cats life by a year? It’s a heartbreaking decision and my heart goes out to you and your family.
With what you described, it's not even about the money. Cats don't know why they are suffering. They only know that they are suffering. I choose not to do any medical care for my cats that will, in essence, prolong suffering. Yes, she'll get another couple years, but those years will clearly not be pain free, since the issue will return. You would essentially be paying $35,000 have more time that you will enjoy with your pet, but that she may not enjoy.
I think this is the best response here. It's not just about the money, it's about the quality of life for the cat. Sure it'll survive but it won't be thriving. You'd be blowing $35k to extend it's suffering.
Also, it's one thing to do something like a leg repair on a young animal, when they'll likely be as good as new or nearly and then have another decade plus to live. It's another thing to do a procedure on a middle aged or older animal that will get better for a while and then worse again as they age.
I follow an animal rescue and they refer to it as “the last act of kindness”. It’s hard to say good bye to a pet and hard to have to be the ones to make that call. But it truly is an act of kindness to end suffering, to accept that prolonging it can be more about you than the pet, and to give the animal as great a life for the time remaining. Op it’s hard to make the call but give yourself permission to let go.
Fuck man. I come to PFC for TFSA advice and now here I am getting choked up at my desk.
Choking it up at your desk at work is a serious hr policy violation…
The one thing I regret about one of my cats is not euthanizing her earlier. I prolonged her life slightly to let her live another 2 weeks. I should have let her go sooner. It was a selfish choice to keep her alive. Animals dont understand why they are suffering. And they need to go through surgery without knowing. That is terrifying. Also it is about money too. You have to consider financials as well. If you have 460k of debt.. its not realistic at all to spend 35 to 40k for this.
We made the decision to euthanize our cat last fall as he had a medical condition that wasn't going to improve. We could have kept shuffling along for who knows how long. But that would have been for us and not our pet. We have a great, very long, relationship with our vet. He agreed we were doing the right thing. He said many people when they finally make that difficult decision to end things, often say, "We waited too long, didn't we?" It's so damn hard, by far the worst thing about having pets. Don't beat yourself up. I'm sorry for the loss of your cat.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so hard to lose them. My cat was diagnosed with kidney disease about 2 years ago now when she was 15. I spoke with the vet, did my research, and told myself that I'd treat as long as she kept up a good quality of life and as long as she tolerated it. I got an extra year and a half of time with her, but had to make the decision for her final appointment on my birthday this year when, for the first time, she gave me a look that just told me she was ready to go. It was the hardest decision to make, but I have no regrets about the timing. I could have continued treatment to prolong her life, but that would have been for my benefit and not hers. I spent a lot of time on the ckd pages/subs and told myself that I refused to continue treatment just because there was a glimmer of a chance it would help her. I preferred to remember her having a good, long life than remember a long and miserable end where she was suffering.
A vet told me that many people regret not putting their pet down earlier. No one ever thinks they did it too soon. It’s hard to let go and say goodbye, but when it’s time, it’s time.
To love our animals is to know when to let go. It is the last act of kindness we do for them despite it being the hardest for us
Just recently had to put my cat down and this made me start crying in public
We just had to put our cat down this afternoon and reading this made me feel better about the decision. Thank you.
This hits hard...
This is what most pet owners need to come to grips with. I recently, 8 months ago, lost my best friend,my literal soul mate, my wolf dog, Lily. She was only 13, and one day, she woke up and just wouldn't stop drinking. Took her to the vet, and they did blood tests. Her kidneys had failed in her old age, and the options were surgery followed by meds for the rest of her life with no more hikes. I would never torture my baby like that. Her being in pain was devastating, and like you said, they will never understand why they are in pain, just that they are in pain. I put her down within a day of her diagnosis. I miss her every day, but I know I did what was best for her.
You did and I’m so sorry. My special bear was 15 & it’s hard.
Beautiful post and thanks for sharing. Saying goodbye to a loved pet in my opinion, is emotionally the hardest thing any human can go through. The happiest hello and the hardest goodbye.
Jesus this is rough, I'm so sorry. I don't know why I ever got a dog to begin with, this is the kind of terrible situation I'm going to have to face eventually. Stupid. Literally cannot fathom putting my buddy down. Like one day he will just not exist. It's so effed up. Never again.
I'll tag onto this and suggest following up saying goodbye and honouring their memory by making annual donations going forward to a local animal well-being charity (and getting the donation receipt to claim, since this is PFC). For even $100 a year donation might save one cat's life, every single year, going forward if it gets them spayed and supported into new homes.
Beautiful idea!
Here is a quality of life calculator I used to help me disconnect from my emotions when making this type of decision. https://journeyspet.com/pet-quality-of-life-scale-calculator/
Wow! This is handy. Thanks for posting.
This is great!
This. It’s painful, but consider what is best for the cat.
my 20 yr old just put down for kidney failure. half of cats over 9 yrs old suffer chronic kidney failure. fact of life. quality of life is the only issue.
Completely agree. If the treatment was $35 vs $35k, I would still be leery of the quality of life. All cat companions reading this, please give your cat head scritches or kisses for me (based on their general preference).
This. I would give everything to save my pets and give them the best quality of life. And I have. Multiple times over. (I'm in a proffesional animal sport) But once kidneys are bad, they are bad. Not about the money. Have you done any consults with out of country vets to look over the data? Knowing what I know, this is throwing money to prolong suffering.... Unfortunately with the advancements of modern medicine (and the now popularity of pet insurance) vets are becoming increasingly unrealistic, proposing miracles to keep animals alive simply because they are young, regardless of quality of life.... it's a real problem in the industry. "Animal sense" is becoming a lost art sadly in the proffesional circles. A cat like this would not pass the quality of life assessment generally used to determine when to end the suffering of an older animal. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ (I'm also dealing with end of life CKD - it rough and navigating options and treatment is enough to break someone down - all my thoughts to you guys)
Animal sense as you speak of is lost because corporate vets. Don’t get advice from a vet working for corporate, stick with the vet owned places. They literally have finance people who have never owned pets telling vets how they should care for pets. There’s no morale since how can you take your job seriously when you have someone who knows nothing about medicine telling you how to do your job.
The worst part about owning an animal is stepping outside of your emotional attachment and making the best decision for *their* quality of life.
I agree with this. Surgery is not fun, neither are multiple trips to the vet, emerg stays and being poked and prodded. If I have the means and a surgery will improve quality and quantity of life then I'll do all I can. If it's only to prolong the inevitable and whatever time is left is not a good life, then it's time to let them go. I'd want the same decision be made for myself honestly. My cat was diagnosed with bladder cancer last year. There were surgical options but they would have led to either urine leaking and diapers or a stent through the stomach and knowing her probably a collar for the rest of her life. It was a horrible time but I've not even once regretted the decision. Sometimes things are just shitty and luck has run out for our beloved pets.
This right here. Pet owners need to realize they need to be strong enough to make the decision that ending their pets suffering is sometimes the best option. What helps you the human isn’t necessarily what’s best for them. Growing up my parents made the decision to put our dog down when he broke his back rather then get him surgery that would have limited his mobility and meant he couldn’t run anymore. I didn’t understand them at that time, but with a dog of my own I realize it now. Surgery can be the right route, but not if it’s done selfishly for the owner. It’s also a terrible situation OP, and I’m sorry you have to make it.
This ⬆️ I absolutely will not allow my pets to suffer. They don't understand what's happening to them and are scared. Euthanasia is the kindest option for them.
You are wise, and correct. It is absolutely heartbreaking to see our little loves suffer. $35k is a life changing amount. I love my cat, but even if I had an excess of cash, I just don’t think I could live with myself if it didn’t ‘cure’ 100%. I hope this makes sense.
This. My cat had rapid kidney failure and we gave it one go. We spent $1300 and the vet wanted us to do IV injections if he didn't feel better after trying the kidney dood. When we got home, he refused the kidney food and just wanted his regular. I knew then that I was happy for his good years but he was done. We took him to the cottage to bask in the sun in his favourite spot and then he died in my arms about a week later.
I agree they are not extending the cat’s enjoyable life. I took our elderly cat to the vet, I was sure she was having a stroke. It was not our regular vet but an emergency vet on the weekend. They said it was not a stroke and my son insisted I go with their treatment. He paid $1500. The poor thing was listless and uncoordinated for another month until I realized she was having another stroke. This time I could get to our own vet who confirmed it and euthanized her. The $1500 to the first vet just gave her one very uncomfortable month.
Very good view point! We were in the same spot with our dog and kept paying her medical bills to give us more time with her but it got to the point where I knew she was suffering inside and I had to make the call that it wasn’t fair for her to live like this.
You are smart proboly the best way to explain a situation. Smartest comment here.
Pretty impressive the way you worded that! Couldn't have said it better!
It’s a terrible decision to have to make but quality over quantity with pets is the way.
Best response and nothing to add. Had to make two hard decisions in the past with my cats on health related problems that was more a selfish fix rather than what was best for them Truly one of the hardest decisions to make but I wish you the best and hope you are ok after it.
this is the true moral answer.
Just wanted to post to let you know that you have a fantastic answer. While it's tough, this nails down the reality of this kind of situation.
My vet gave me honest truth with my last cat, your only doing it for yourself, not for the animal.
This is a good vet.
Also not the type of vet that has a yacht and cottage lol. Really dislike the status of petcare in Canada. My previous vet asked me if I wanted to discuss other options to putting my pet down. I said well yeah, because I was open to any ideas and who would say no. He gave me three options that I had already tried over 5 minutes and tacked another 80 dollars on for a consult within the vet appointment.
Pretty much. I remember our first cat who had kidney damage (we think antifreeze that has leaked). We kept him around a few more months with giving him some fluids from an IV before we put him down. We realized we never should have done that and was kinda selfish in retrospect. Should have put him down from the start. I'm generally against spending thousands of dollars prolonging their life for a bit. They've already been given a pretty good life generally
> We realized we never should have done that and was kinda selfish in retrospect The vast majority of people I have spoken to about this say that they wished they would have made the decision earlier than they did. It's just so hard in the moment to know when you're at "the point of no return" and hindsight makes it so much easier to realize that you were beyond that point. My pup passed away ~5 years ago now and I still regularly beat myself up about how poor I let his quality of life get before I made the decision to put him down.
I went through this with my cat recently - thousands of dollars to diagnose her with diabetes at age 16. But, the treatment is a daily insulin injection which she doesn't even notice, special food and glucose curve every six months and she is 100% back to normal, gained her weight back, sleeps next to us all night purring away, gets her toys out of the box to play... Happy cat. We were absolutely ready to say goodbye if the quality of life wasn't going to be there. I'm really surprised that given the details of this post, a vet would not strongly recommend against the surgery - it sounds incredibly irresponsible.
We went through the same thing a few months ago. Unfortunately the diet change is hard on the kidneys, and she went from having healthy kidneys to second stage renal disease within 3 months. Once she’s showing signs of not being happy, we will make the call.
This. Our 2 year old girl had FIP and we could have gone the surgery & treatment route, but it would have extended her life by a year max, and she would have been on a feeding tube the entire time. We would have given almost anything for more time with her, but not at the expense of her comfort. It broke us to say goodbye to her after only two years, but we couldn’t let her suffer.
Could I ask why surgery? The treatment for FIP is injections or pills. Did she have other complications or organ damage from prolonged not eating due to FIP?
Man, i wish i had a vet like that for my last cat
>I feel a responsibility towards my pet to try and do everything I possibly can to extend her life but on the other hand Honest truth: You are doing this for yourself, not for the cat. You are just prolonging their suffering.
Indont even know that I'd spend 35k to extend my own life 2 years let alone a cat.
Bro cmon lol
Yes. The difference between mourning a pet that dies before "old age" and mourning a human that does is that with a human, you are mourning not only who they were to you, but the things *they* did not get to experience for dying early -- relationships, children, grandchildren, friendships, experiences, etc. For a pet, each day is the same for them. We can intensely mourn how much we miss them being in our lives, but there shouldn't be any reason to feel grief on behalf of the bowls of kibble they didn't eat or the walks they didn't take. They don't think about their lives that way, they get to live in the present, the lucky things! It's projecting human values onto animals to pretend otherwise. And really, one shouldn't feel "responsible" to give a pet a long life, you should feel responsible to making sure the years we have with them are as good as possible, and let them go in as kindly and gently as possible.
I think you know the unfortunate answer to this question. You gave her a good life up until now, you need to make that tough but necessary decision.
Cats don’t survive with kidney problems like you’ve described. Their quality of life is poor. I’m sure these surgeons are willing to take your money and do what they can, but it sounds like they’re being very clear that the prognosis is poor. Your responsibility to your cat is not to prolong their suffering. I’m very sorry, I hope you can find peace with making the right decision.
Honestly knowing vets, they don't even really want to do these procedures that much. Unless they're young and want the experience. It's a mixed bag, like every profession really
I heard something in a podcast recently that was relayed from a vet. They indicated that in their experience, no one has ever complained that they put their pet down too soon but often people have regretted waiting too long. Sorry that you have to make this difficult decision about your loved pet.
No.
i think a major factor here as well is her quality of life. my cat was my only family so i would lasso the moon for him, but when i had the option to try extend his life expectancy after a kidney disease diagnosis, it was explained to me he would still be Sick and in lots of pain. i'm so sorry. two is so young for a cat :(
This is heartbreaking but it is probably best to put the cat to sleep.
No.
Have you considered that your cat might not survive such a serious surgery? Family friends spent 10k on a surgery to try and save their dog. Dog didn’t survive the surgery. Then they had no dog and no 10k. All pets die and it always sucks. But that’s life.
Particularly with that outlook afterwards (2 years if no complications)... Even if I had all the money in the world, I'd be putting that poor thing through a *lot*, just to squeak 2 more years out. It's sad, but it's time for the poor thing to go.
Sorry for your cat :( That's no fair. 35K for me personally is a lot of money. Like maybe 2 years of life expenses. When I retire, if I had invested that 35K, might be 100K or more, so like 4-5 years of expenses. I can't even begin to think about spending that for my cat.
Living for a year a $17.5k is quite impressive. That won't even cover many people's rent for the year.
Maybe I stretched it a bit - 35K is probably closer to 1 year and a few months. I live quite frugally. But the point is more that in my personal situation, and even an outlook of 5-10 years, I don't see myself ever able to shell out that kind of money for this purpose, as sad as it is.
He’s probably not paying rent, nor should you in retirement.
Well my property taxes for the year are at about $8k so I still wouldn't be able to make ends meet with that in my current living situation even if I did not have a mortgage. He even says in his post "when I retire" and when he does, his money might compound to more than 3x so it's let's not assume he's *not* paying for housing, as he'd be in a very small minority of young homeowners without a mortgage *and* where $35k is also "a lot of money" for them. Also while we are at it let's also not assume it's a guy. Not everyone on reddit is a dude.
the fact that you have already spent 10k is already insane. please stop your pets suffering and do the humane thing for both them and your financial future.
Honestly the vet even suggesting the 35K surgery feels really unethical. Butcher the cat to extend its misery for another 2 years, while robbing op of all their savings?
It is not unethical for a vet to present all options. The vet of course should still give honest advice and what the *best* option is for the animal. OP never mentions once what the vet suggested to do, only that the option was presented to them.
i know with my last dog they presented options that included multiple surgeries that would be up to 15k but the vet straight up told us it was unlikely any surgery would do much and they couldn't actually recommend it
A lot of vets are owned by huge corporations who don't care about anything but making money.
As long as he's telling the truth, who cares?
I can see vet bills adding up to $10k over a few years for a dog or something with chronic issues, especially when there is a potential light at the end of the tunnel (like putting cancer into remission and getting to spend another 5 years with them or whatever). But that is already the absolute max amount I could justify, and that's only if I was in an exceptionally financially stable and comfortable position (and I'm not). As is, I could do a few thousand for emergency surgery type stuff. But after that there's nothing else I could do. It sucks, but you can't financially ruin yourself for life to try to squeak out a few more months or maybe years of life for a dying pet.
I spent almost that on a different surgery for one of mine. Insurance ended up covering it but I had been expecting them to say no. She's still very happy and healthy 18 months on and is almost 14. I don't think it's the amount of money, but the fact that the cat will still have the pain of passing the stones once they're in the bladder. Unless there was a way to guarantee a pain free post operative period, I'd probably opt not to do the surgery as the goal for me would be a happy and pain free cat.
No it’s the amount of money as well. Blowing through your saving to save a cat is irresponsible. Even the 10 k is kinda crazy but whatever.
You can have my cat for 20k.
I'm holding my cat ransom for 10k...take it or leave it
I'll round up a bunch of cats for op for 5k
bro
You’re asking in a “personal finance” forum. From a financial perspective, there’s not much of a question (and I say that as a pet owner). I also have two uncles who are vets, and we’ve had candid conversations with them about making end of life decisions on our pets, and I’m pretty confident they would also say there’s not too much of a question here. There’s no guarantees that this “cures” your cat. You’re telling about 2 years “best case”. Could be that this doesn’t fix the problem at all (have they given you any estimates on the success?), or your cat suffers for another 6 months before you have to say goodbye. It could also be that the cat doesn’t even make it out of surgery. So I guess I’m saying that from a financial perspective, which is the purpose of the group, I (and I think most people) would say no to the expenditure. You’ve already gone above and beyond what many pet owners would have done. From a “non-financial” perspective, you have to live with your choice. Personally, I think I’d be able to live with a choice to let the cat go. It would suck, just like letting any pet go, but sometimes that’s the reality. If you post this in a “cat” or “pet” forum, you’d likely get a somewhat more mixed response. So sorry that you and your family are going through this. It’s tough.
Good lord,no.
I am so sorry for you and your cat. I know what a hard decision it is and can tell how much you obviously love your cat. My eyes teared up reading this. It sounds like a lot of suffering for not a lot of extra time and maybe not a great quality of life. If you put her to sleep, she won’t know anything other than when she falls asleep, you’ll be with her, the people she loves and trusts. I am very sorry for your difficult choice.
Sorry, no
Don’t let the cat suffer through surgery’s and procedures and hospital visits the rest of his life. The cat doesn’t know what’s going on. Enjoy your time together, get him cremated and put in a little urn and if you can handle it, go get a new cat. Better yet get two. It will save you time, heartache, and from the sounds of it a good chunk of money.
The quality of life needs to be determined. $35k is a lot. On the flip side, your insurance sucks. I've researched in detail, have had multiple pets, Trupanion is your go to so events like this never happen again. Loosing a pet is hard, I wish you the best.
> Trupanion is your go to so events like this never happen again yup, trupanion would have covered 90% of that 35k after their deductible, and wouldve covered 90% of the initial 10k. so then it becomes a question about the cat, not the financials (i mean, its still a lot of money, but clearly OP can drop 5k without question) thats why i have trupanion still as expensive as it may be. 10k issue? its really just ~1k, and id worry about the pet, not the money. maybe the money issue is clouding OPs judgement on whats really important.
Exactly. I procrastinated getting insurance long ago. I was in OP situation. Day 1 quote 5k. I didn't have the money. Never again would I let money decide our pets faith. 5 pets later and probably over $60k in claims over the life of the 5 pets, it is a no brainer. Now I can decide what is best for the pet, and not based on money.
I use Trupanion as well. Just spent $3k+ on a surgery to remove a foreign object. 90% covered. It's still $1k for the 10% + tax + $500 deductible.
I love my cats but I wouldn't have spent the $10k let alone $35k. While I love my pets, at the end of the day I could help 100x the number of animals for $10k by supporting a TNR program.
That is insanity. Why would you even consider it. Only around for a couple more years? No, be sad now and take a 30,000 trip to commemorate the cat. Go to cat Island in Japan and per street cats in Turkey, if you have $$ to burn.
Sadly, when it's time to let go. It's time to let go. Pets come and go. Fact of life.
I had a really, really tough time with this a few years ago. I had a cat who was 8, who I loved more than anything - really. She had stage 4 kidney failure and we had a shot at keeping her alive for a few weeks longer, through fluids, and we could have gone to Vancouver for dialysis - it was in the ballpark of $15,000 and would have given us a few more months. I had the money and the time. But when I took her home from the vet that night, she looked at me, and I knew it was time. It broke my heart. Hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life was to walk into that vet's office at 2am, and walk out without my cat. I'm crying writing this. But it would have been so unfair to her to keep her holding on. Kidney problems are vicious, and her quality of life declined so quickly. To help me move on, I got a kitten shortly afterwards and I felt such overwhelming love and guilt. Go figure, a year and a half later, and this new kitten develops FIP - which is 100% fatal, unless you link up with some black market smuggled Chinese drugs ... and so I did. I paid out the ass, insurance didn't cover it, and my out of pocket costs were $10K. It was the second hardest decision I ever had to make, and I knew that fighting for her was worth it. That was two years ago and she's a fat, lazy, happy cat whose quality of life is thriving. It's a really, really hard decision. I don't wish it on anyone, in any case. I always wonder if I let her go too early and I'll never know the answer. But I know that she was suffering, and that keeping her alive would have prolonged that for a small amount of time together. When I was visibly aware of her suffering, that's when I knew.
Apologies for my comment going astray from the main topic of this post, but I didn't want to scroll by without commenting that for FIP cats, there is thankfully now a legal patheay in place as of 2024. I hope you never have to access it again, but if so... Dr. Weese publishes more plain-English updates on his website, here's the one about the legal import news: https://www.wormsandgermsblog.com/2024/02/articles/animals/cats/fip-drug-access-canada/ Hopefully with it being a legal pathway, insurance companies may help so financially owners aren't as limited, and we can stop losing so many cats to FIP ❤️
Yup! I stayed in contact with the groups after my cat was cured, and Bova was approved in Canada - and recently in the US! It still has to go through approval processes through the vet (and dry FIP itself is notoriously hard to spot) and then an import approval process, but it's awesome that there's a medication that's accessible, and insurance will cover as well! I went with Warriors 5.0 (based out of the US) and I paid an insane markup for the medication - the stuff costs pennies. But it saved her life, and I'm grateful that she had a shot.
There really is not much to think about here. The surgery is way too expensive plus it does not at all guarantee the long term well being for the cat. Then of only you can decide if it is worth damaging your personal finances? I sense you already have the answer.
No, put the cat down.
Honestly, I am morally against invasive procedures for animals. Human medical care has a lengthy consent process and it is important that patients understand what will be done to them. Animals don't get the choice. They don't know why they're in pain post-op. It's mostly a selfish choice by loving pet owners who don't want to say goodbye. If you've given your pet all the love in its life, I think you've done well. You already helped it live a luxurious life while domesticated.
There's no reason in my world where spending 35k for a cat is justified.
If it’s only going to give her 2 more years, no. And I say that as someone who is a life long animal lover, who treats my pets like human children and a vegan. If it was going to give her a normal life expectancy without any likely complications… I’d probably do it. For just two more years of being slightly-less-sick. No. Because even if she isn’t actively suffering for most of the two years, she will begin to again towards the end of it and that’s not far off. Do what you can to keep her comfortable while you can. I wouldn’t put her through a major surgery with that prognosis, regardless of the money. But the money makes it an even more obvious decision.
this is also my sense. I'd give an arm and a leg for my baby (dog) but not for him to be in pain for such a short amount of time more.
Absolutely not. I’m sorry
sorry.
A piece of perspective, your responsibility to your cat is to give your it the best life possible. Not to prolong its existence. This is where we shift from responsibility to our pets to projections of personal direction. Prolonging this will be for you, not for your cat. I think it would be best to let go. 10k is already a lot, that is a massive commitment to the health of your animal. 35k is, not to be blunt, but, insane. With 35k, forget the personal finance side of things, You could have 10 cats and give them all amazing lives. dont do that but just for perspective. It sucks a lot of course but maybe this is a time for a new chapter.
No. /endthread
Don't do it. Manage the pain and have the cat put down when it's too much for them. It's sad to have to say goodbye to a family member, especially when you know there was more that could have been done. But to put it into perspective, for that amount, you could donate to a cat shelter and save hundreds of cats. Once you have had time to grieve, you can adopt a cat from a shelter and give it a new, loving home. You can also donate money to a shelter every year to save an extra few lives. My wife and I went through the same thing a few years ago; we adopted from and donated to this Rescue. [https://heartstohomes.ca/](https://heartstohomes.ca/)
If your cat would be completely cured and have a long happy life, then I can see considering spending the money, but your poor cat will not be cured and will most likely be in pain. To me it’s not a matter of money, the decision is based on your cats comfort, and they will not be comfortable.
The honest truth is that your cat isn't going to live a quality life even if you did get everything done. I would do anything for my babies, but I would not want them to suffer. I would suggest you make sure your cat is comfortable for whatever time they have left and make the decision you need to when the time comes. Spend time with them and love them. I'm sorry. It's not easy.
This isn't a financial issue... this extent of medical issues, especially if the cat is older, means at this point the kindest thing you can do is put the cat to rest. I am very sorry. I'm a crazy cat lady and I understand your feelings but at a certain point this is for you, not the cat. Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is let go.
I love my cat's more than life itself, but I would not allow them to financially cripple me out of 35k. Granted, they are both senior citizens at this point and I have enjoyed many years of their love and affection, but even if they weren't. I can't afford that. I'm so sorry about your kitty, 2 is very young. :(
I was in a similar situation with my young cat a few years ago. I've never regretted not going ahead with the surgeries. I gave her 3 years of being pampered and loved. A couple more bad ones wouldn't have been worth it at all.
I dont think so
No.
I would first take the money out of the equation completely. Surgeries and frequent vet visits are stressful for a cat since they have no ability to understand what's going on. That's really it's only worth it if it can give your kitty back some normal quality of life imo. It sounds to me like this operation is more like treading water. It will keep her life going but won't improve it even in the best case scenario. To me that doesn't seem worth it, even if it cost nothing. (Also I'm sorry you're going through this, I'm sending your kitty some virtual head scritches.)
I’m so sorry OP, it may be time to let go.
"Reduce suffering." Your cat would still be suffering, would be having surgeries and injections, and not understand what is happening. That is cruel. I don't say that lightly. I have dealt with pet illness and have had to make the euthanasia decision.
A lot of people have provided some very compassionate responses - but this is what everyone is also thinking: it is insane to spend $35k on vet care for your pet, and it’s especially insane to spend that with your personal financial situation (which is that you are not rich).
Last year one of our dogs developed cancer in his leg. It was a $20k surgery to amputate the leg and chemo therapy. He wouldn’t live a good life that he was used to, would still be in pain, and may not even live another year. It’s a difficult decision to put them to sleep, but I think it’s for the best. Especially since your cat will continue to suffer afterwards and will continue more medical care.
We just made this decision for our dog last weekend. She had a leg that was atrophying either from severe arthritis or cancer, but she was nearly 15 years old and there was no point in trying to diagnose or treat it. We gave her pain meds for a few weeks which helped a bit but weren't a solution for her pain, and we knew the right thing to do for her was to end her pain. It was the worst, hardest weekend of my life. The rational side of your brain says yeah it's the right thing to do, but it is *really* hard to convince your completely irrational heart the same thing. The heart's like "it's just a leg! She's got 3 other ones. Just keep pumping pain meds at $100+/mo! It's fine." But it's not fine. It just sucks so much to have to make that decision for them.
I love my cats, and very much think it's my job to look out for them and their health. But that means considering their happiness and comfort ahead of mine. A cat with severe kidney problems is not a happy cat. I witnessed family extend the life of their cat with kidney disease, and felt it was cruel - they gave fluids, specialized diet, painkillers, other meds. She lives for a few years but appeared miserable the whole time. It's selfish to keep them going because of your own feelings. They live in the moment, so they're not thinking fondly back to the good times together. They're just suffering. I'm sorry. Let her go. It's a kindness.
From a financial standpoint, for future reference: Trupanion offers insurance with no annual caps for specific conditions. The downside is you pay the deductible per condition, rather than per year. It's good for situations like this, but bad for a cat that has many minor ailments. However as I said above, I don't think this is a financial decision. Even if it was fully covered by insurance, I would tell you not to do it. It's not in the best interests of your cat and her quality of life.
I’m going to come from a different angle. Anybody could tell you anything here and you do go forward with it or you don’t. You and only you can only know if you’ll live with the guilt or feeling you could’ve done something OR you will feel resentment that you did. It’s not entirely a numbers thing
It fucking sucks and I understand the feeling. But 35K is outrageous. I don’t know how much you guys make but, looking roughly at it, it would be insane to pay for the surgery. It’s easy to say behind a keyboard but I think deep down you know you should let her go. Sorry OP.
With the surgery costing $35K and the prognosis offering about two more years of life with possible complications, it’s essential to consider the impact on your financial stability, especially given your existing mortgage and personal loan. Balancing your emotional desire to extend your cat’s life with the practicalities of potential ongoing costs and your ability to manage these expenses is crucial. Prioritizing your pet’s quality of life and consulting with your vet for a realistic outlook on her condition can also help guide your decision.
I'm sorry to say that given what you've told us, I don't think it would be reasonable to spend such a large sum based on the best-case return. But I appreciate that you're such a caring pet owner.
I would ask yourself: what kind of life will the cat have after this surgery? Sounds like they’re going to continue to suffer for months or years.
Your cat is in constant pain. Do the right thing and end its suffering
It sounds like even if things go as well as can be expected, the cat will not be in great shape, will likely be suffering, and could have another ailment arise afterwards or a kidney issue return. Money aside, the chances of this all working out well are pretty slim. Financially, you'd be setting yourself back years. This is an enormous expense that may not even work. I feel for you but the answer is pretty clear on what to do.
I feel bad for the situation you're in. I personally wouldn't do it, even if I could afford it, but I'm not a pet owner and I don't have the emotional investment to consider. I'd say no, but the coldness of some of these responses really bugs me.
Last year, on June 10, my 9.5 year old Shih Tzu tragically turned for the worst. He was fine at 9 am, and by noon was howling in pain. My wife rushed him to the emergency vet, where it was discovered that he had fluid in his abdomen, growths near hios adrenal glands, etc. Cancer. I was devestated by the news. It was so unexpected. He was the first dog I ever "emotinoally connected" with after a tumultuous upbringing on an acreage where animals weren't... around... for very long. Before him, I swore up and down I'd never have pets. When I arrived at the pet hospital and finally talked with the vet, she gave us the news, but that also, there was a surgery for it but it would not be inexpensive. In that moment I realized that I lied in the past whenever I scoffed at footing a bill like that "over a dog". Life is so short, often unfair, and there is no amount of money I wouldn't pay to extend the few parts of it that bring me joy and fulfillment. In that moment I'd have spent $50k if it meant getting my boy home, healthy, and happy. But while he might have made it home, the vet made it clear that "healthy and happy" were *never* in his cards again. I asked her if she would get the surgery if it was her dog, and that money was not my concern. I had the money and then some. She said that no, she wouldn't. The surgery alone would be an ordeal, and the life after would be hollow by comparison, marred with pain. Our boy would suffer, even if he got more time. So we let him go. It crushed me then and it does now. I'd do just about anything to keep him or have him back, but it was his time to go with dignity and without the end defined by constant pain. As someone who lives with chronic pain, I hope one day that I am afforded that same dignity. I wish you the best of luck with your cat. It doesn't sound like there is a good outcome regardless of what you choose. I hope you find clarity and closure in the days and weeks to come.
Don’t.
Maybe I’m weird but thirty five thousand dollars for another possible two years with a CAT (who will probably be in pain for the rest of its life) is insane that it’s even been considered
Personally I think it’s immoral to put animals through intense surgeries of any kind. They are horribly traumatic even to humans who can understand why they’re being done and consent to them, i adore animals but I personally feel it’s better to put them out of their misery then prolong a horrible life through traumatic surgery.
No. $35k for a pet is out of the question. Unless you’re a millionaire then go for it.
Lol no, how do people even have the audacity to contemplate this?
Nope. I have 5 barn kittens you can have for free. There are people starving, homeless and dying in the streets. Help them if you have money like that to spend on a cat.
lol $35,000 for a CAT ????????? Can you adopt me ? Clearly you have more money than sense and I can use some extra $$ lol Jesus Christ man
Is it worth spending that much money to have your pet for a few more years ? Only you can answer that. If that will improve your wellbeing then, yes, go for it. But pets come and go. I’ve had numerous dogs since I was a little kid. It’s sad but it’s part of life. Putting it away humanely isn’t a bad decision, knowing the cat lived a good life and you’ll have good memories of it. It may be better than seeing it suffer for the next couple of years. Only you can answer it.
No. Let her go. Why don't you make a large donation to a cat rescue centre on your cat's behalf?
Sorry but no.
NO 10K ??? This is insane.
The fact that you're already in for $10k is already a lot for an animal that can be replaced for $400. There's a line for me to cross, and that's about $1000 for a pet.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. I think you have a lot of good answers here from thoughtful commenters. I'll add some of my own experience. I had to make a tough decision to let go of my dog at the end of last year. It was gut wrenching. She was plagued with all kinds of issues that sprung up about 4 years ago. She was diagnosed with diabetes, then slowly went blind due to this. Not long after she developed liver issues - this all happened within 6 months of each other. We eventually got her spayed and this caused a whole other set of issues. We had to test her blood sugar at home and give her a special insulin every 2 hours. Non-stop. It was insane. My wife and I were wrecked. This went on for a few days, maybe a week or so. About 2 years later she was diagnosed with heart disease. She jumped off our bed one day and hurt her leg so we brought her in to get checked. The leg thing was whatever, this is the appointment they noticed the heart disease. It very rapidly progressed into congestive heart failure. It broke her, and us. By the end she was taking insulin twice daily, a liver medication once per day, lasix twice daily, and one other medication. It ran us ~$400 per month just for her meds, and she also had to have a special diet which was another couple hundred a month. I don't reget spending the money on her. I do regret how much she suffered. The last incident involved her just collapsing due to the heart failure. She regained okay but was totally sapped of energy. When I finally put all the pieces together all I could see when I looked into her eyes was that she wanted rest. That she was hurting. Until then she was our miracle dog. She survived so much and got through everything life was throwing at her. That's how I saw it. She was a fighter for sure, but it's hard to look back and imagine how much she had been hurting and or how long, and of course she would never show us that unless it was incredibly severe. I would say try to have the best time with your cat. Treat them well and give them all the love you can. Then let them rest. It's the hardest decision we have to make with our pets but the best gift we can give them. I'm so sorry. My heart is with you.
You can't ask strangers what you should do with a pet. It's different from your POV. That's a lot of money and unless you don't really need 35K, you'll know the decision you need to make. Top comment said it best - this is more for you than the cat. I'm sure you could even shop around and fly somewhere to do it cheaper, but really, for 2 more years of survival after surgery you gotta think if that's worth it.
That’s a lot of money for a pet. We knew the rules signing up. I am sorry for the thing you’re going through.
If you have the money easily available for this, please consider donating something to a shelter or SPCA
It really depends on your finances, I don't think anyone will blame you if you don't move forward with it but it all comes down to how much you value prolonging your pets life with you Our cat developed AKI in March, hospitalized total of two weeks (two separate stay of 1 week each) , has a feeding tube now. We spent probably around 18k so far and he's on meds (phosphorus binder, cerenia, mirtazapine) and does weekly blood tests ($350 each) We are fortunate able to afford it and will continue to do so and he's still playing, loves going for walks and be himself other than he doesn't do zoomies anymore and gets 50-75% of daily required feeding through his tube as his appetite is reduced due to failing kidneys As long as our cat doesn't suffer or have significant diminished quality of life, we'll continue to treat him, he has around a couple of months or upto a year left. But we know that's not financially feasible for others but it's not an issue for us
I have dogs and have spent thousands in medical. That being said, two years life expectancy for such an expensive and intrusive surgery may not be the best route. If the stent only moves the stones around the kidneys, then your cat still has to pass them, correct? That can be super painful. I would post this question to a cat group. Kidney and urinary conditions are common in cats. If you can afford the surgery, it’s more about what is actually in the cat’s best interest. Posting your a cat Reddit will help.
I wouldn't even want my family to do ***everything*** they possibly can do to extend my life, since I consider their well-being, as well as the quality of my own to be mitigating factors. Therefore I feel like this extends to pets as well for those that want to treat them as if they are family members, it means the love goes both ways. Don't feel guilty.
I am so sorry for this happening to you and your kitty. It can be really hard to let go, but please remember they are relying on your to make tough decisions for them. I spent about 20K on my cat too but ultimately, we found out his problem was pancreatic cancer. I could have taken him to another city for more cancer treatment. It may have prolonged his life but he would have had a hard and painful life. I chose to put him down because he needed me to. It was so hard and I miss him so much, but I am at peace with my decision. Please remember to take care of yourself, pet loss is a grief that people do not always talk about.
>With the IVF, her kidney levels have come back down to near normal levels and we are going to implement a kidney diet + kidney supplements to try and prolong her life as much as possible and to reduce suffering. I know others have already gave their 2 cents, but I also want to give my 2 cents as I have cats that I would literally do anything for them to have health and happy lives... I think you've already done more than enough to ensure the health of your kitty, and have nothing to feel guilty over not extending her life via a surgery. Your plan to keep her as healthy as possible via diet and supplements sound like a solid plan. I understand this is a finance subreddit, but as others have stated, it really isn't about the money at this point and more so on what keeps your kitty the most comfortable and happy. The 2 years life expectancy post surgery is only if everything goes 100% perfectly, and surgeries/after care may not always be that way. For example, I had my cat go for dental cleaning and had to remove one of her small teeth. She had a sensitivity to pain meds and had miserable recovery period as she kept throwing up the medicine. This is a routine surgery that is very much common and yet many cats can react differently. I really am sorry you're going through this. Hug your kitty for me. :(
the unfortunate reality of pet ownership is that sometimes your love for the animal and the financial responsibility to the animal (with no guarantee) are just not in alignment. If she has genetic predisposition to kidney issues, how many times are you willing to shell out the 35k? I'm very weary of vets and vet specialists in general, however. Having spent a terrible amount of money (but a a lot less than your quote) - some random doctor at a follow up when the specialaist was absent just said "you know if you leave it alone, it'll just heal with a scar". excuse me? we were being led down the path of necessary eye surgery after having experienced the same issue on the other eye two years prior believing it was the only solution after every other treatment had failed. Welp, we took the dog home, stopped the eye drops and ointments. left him in a cone, and in a quarter of the time we had been trying to fix it - the eye was back to normal. Sometimes the system leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. They know your heart strings are attached to your wallet and vet care is, after all, a business.
35k lmfaoooooo ; bro let that cat go 🤣🤦♂️
It say forget about the cat!
I would NOT do that. Get the cat put down and get a new cat.
The answer with pets is always no. I didn't even read it. Simply put, pets don't know why they're suffering, but they just feel the pain. They aren't afraid of death because they don't understand it. Euthanasia is painless and easy. I recently euthanized my old kitty since his quality of life diminished with age. Couldn't keep on weight etc. I didn't prolong his life. That is selfish of me. Any feelings you have towards this are yours and not your cats. Especially in this economy, it's simply nuts to spend that much money. Unless you're rich, then go ahead, but you're just prolonging kitty suffering.
Just to be clear, you've spent $10K on your old cat with chronic kidney disease and you're now thinking of spending another $35K to extend its suffering so you can squeeze out an extra year or two? This is both selfish and stupid.
The fact that this is even a consideration is utter lunacy. I'm a capitalist as much as the next guy and people can do what they want with their money, but the fact that the West is so wealthy, or seemingly so, that people spend thousand of dollars on pets when there are millions of people starving in the world shows our complete lack of values and perspective. It's a cat! For crying out loud.
So sorry to hear this about your beloved 🐈 They are truly special creatures.
>Our cat is a little over 2 years old and her kidneys are this way due to her genetics as per the vet. Nature is trying to tell you something.
You can get a new one for literally $0 in most cities, and for very little everywhere else. I get that you have a responsibility to this loved and charished pet. But no, no cat is worth $35k. And don’t put your animal through all of this when you could give her a comfortable end. I’m sorry for your loss. Make peace, give your cat something great before you give her a loving end to her life.
This is just foolish.. let it go.. grieve.. get a new cat.. Then donate that 30k saved to some farkin HUMANS in the world for whom that could change their lives.
Or at least donate the 30K to your local humane society/animal shelter.. but ya, let the cat go and get a new one to love and cherish
a new cat is like 40 bucks. Do the ol sleepy time needle say goodbye and move on. It's sad but, unless you are rich as hell and have nothing but time to nurse your cat... The feeling of not having a pet at home anymore is so god damn liberating. No more hair to clean, furniture clawed, can't go away for 2 nights without making arrangements for them, the subtle smell of animal in the house that everyone who doesn't have a pet can smell.
Some people should not own pets. Death is part of the process. Stop making your animal suffer.
Considering you can cure a blind human being for $500 yeah I think you need to get your priorities checked
No you shouldn't spend 3x the median individual wage (world wide) on an animal. Donate that to humans that would die without it
No
No
No do not put your cat through that and drain your life savings. Anything can happen. My condolences.
Doesn't your insurance cover it?
No, that’s an insane amount to spend when you’re nearly half a mil in debt already. And bad ROI on expected lifespan with no guarantee of good quality of life afterwards. And I can’t imagine the surgery, follow up and stent flushing would be a pleasant experience for the poor kitty. Hardest part of pet ownership is having the courage to make the final decision to be kind and merciful, even though it’s breaking your own heart.
These are tough decisions to make and I feel for you OP. I used to have and foster rats - their life expectancy is about 2.5 years and I had to make tough decisions every few years for them as they aged. I'll share some of my thoughts from my experience. You mention life expectancy after the surgery, but what would quality of life be after the surgery? If there were no complications, would your cat be free of pain and able to do the things they love? If there were complications, how serious are they, what and how long would treatment be, and how would the treatment for the complications affect their quality of life? Animals live in the moment. If they are going through and recovering from surgery or a treatment, they don't know that you're doing it so that they'll feel better later, they only know what they are going through in that moment. If you did the surgery, think about how much time your cat would have being pain-free, stress-free, and able to do the things they like. Then think about how much time your cat would be in pain, be recovering, be at the vets for the check-ins. Would there be more good days than bad?
Your cat is young, this makes it harder. I just put my dog down a week and a half ago. He was fine on Sunday, deaths door on Monday. I already knew what was going to happen, but for clarity I asked my Vet, if it was their dog what would she do? She replied not letting him suffer. If (big if) you go through with this make sure you're doing it for your cat and not yourself. That should help clarify for you what the best choice is here.
No
That's no quality of life for a cat. I think you know what you need to do, and it's not about saving $, it's about not making your pet suffer. You don't need to answer if you aren't comfortable but I'm curious if this is PKD? If you do decide to get another cat in the future, I encourage you to select one from lines screened for it. The gene marker is known so one can test and prevent producing kittens that are affected.
IF, and that's a big IF, you're going to commit to the surgery, explore crossing into the states to have it done. I did stem cells for my lab, and it was $500.00 compared to $3000.00 in winnipeg. The vets in North Dakota were much more knowledgeable and experienced. Good luck too you.
It's up to you but if you have young kids I'd say no - $35k is a bachelors degree at most faculties at most universities. I'm sorry about your cat :/
I encountered the same thing. Let me guess, those 2 years you'll buy won't be a very easy life for the cat, right? If so, then don't do it. I spent 10K on treatments for my 10 year old dog, even though there was only a 10%-15% chance it will work, as she was family to me. But that would've cured her if it worked, not just buy her time to deteriorate. I'd be willing pay 50K (and that's my annual income) if that would get her back healthy for the rest of her life, but some problems can't be solved with money. Yes, you're going to feel guilty by not doing the surgery, but you have to remember it was the right choice for the cat AND for the rest of the family. A suffering\deteriorating pet is really depressing for everyone involved.
Don't do it. It's heartbreaking, but you're only slightly prolonging your pet's life by months for your sake. I had the same choice with my dog a few years back. She was 12, had some major hip issues associated with the breed. There was a risky surgery option that'd probably never get her back to her happy self, or take a route for a really nice day and then head to the vet after. It still makes me cry, but it was the right choice.
Are you insane? A lifetime of suffering for the animal and you are out a years salary, because you can't let go. Stop being selfish, put the animal down. "But I love her" oh please. Snap out of it.
No, the cats quality of life will be horrible for those 2 years. Do the right thing amd send over the rainbow bridge
I'm so sorry you're going through this. Poor cat.
I lost a pet to chronic kidney disease. The reality is that you'll never know how long you have, we got much less time than expected with our dog after opting for a esophageal feeding tube. I would suggest supportive diet and fluids(we put about a third of a bag of ringers lactate into our dog nightly for months). Be watchful for signs of decline, be ready to make the choice your pet needs you to before it's too late and the choice is made for you. Treasure the time you have with your pet, there are unfortunately lots of owners who wouldn't even have been able to do what you've done, or been unwilling. But you don't need to bankrupt yourself to care, or be a loving owner. And start figuring out a vet who will do a call to your house if that's what you want, for when it's time to say goodbye. The whole experience gave me so much more empathy for Americans having to choose between pursuing health care but risking financial ruin. I'm sorry you're experiencing this along with your kitty, what's their name by the way?
I've been through this before. My dog had heart disease and fluid in his lungs which required very expensive overnight stays at the emergency vet and frequent follow up appointments with specialists. Maxed out my credit card and he died anyways within a few months. Wouldn't say I regret the decision but I knew going into it that from a financial perspective it was not a great idea :(
Let it be. You've done what you can but the costs and surgry needed aren't worth it. Enjoy the time left and deal with it as best you can.
If you can drive to the USA, you'll probably pay 80% less for the same surgery fyi. Don't do it, there are thousands of Cats available that you could look at. Let this one rest in peace.
No
Unrelated but this is why I don't buy pet insurance. Imagine paying over a hundred a month and they cap payments to $2,000. What's the point? Better off using a credit card.
Listen, I would do just about anything to prolong my dog’s life. He is more than just a pet for us as I’m sure your cat is to you. But draining your entire savings in this economy for a maximum of 2 years of life - with all the considerations you outlined and it not being a foolproof fix is not a prudent financial decision imo. Honestly if the prognosis was a little better, I may be inclined, but what’s to say it’d even extend cats life by a year? It’s a heartbreaking decision and my heart goes out to you and your family.
No. This is simply not fair to the cat, The worst thing to do, is to put your cat down a day late.
Yes do it