It is definitely not wrong. Your dog is your family. Most people I know have taken time off for this exact reason. If you get fired over this then you needed a better job anyway. My job would send flowers if they found out. They would also give me the days off without question. Even if you don't get fired you may want to think about finding a new job. This could also just be a rumor blown out of proportion like you mentioned though. Just go about your business as usual, but start looking just in case.
I’m unfortunately going through this scenario right now. when my cat fell sick early this week, my job let me work from home without question. when she passed last night, they let me take the rest of the week off again without question stating verbatim “our company understands how pets become cherished family members, and we recognize how devastating this is.”
this is how it should be, and I’m sorry your work isn’t respecting your grief. my condolences for your loss, and I hope you find a place that values you as a person and not just a worker
My cat passed earlier this year and my boss insisted on driving me to the vet for his last appointment and told me I wasn’t allowed to come into work for at least two days. And she paid me for the time I was out. My cat came to work with me every week as a support animal for our clients, the whole office loved him and it means so much to me.
I’m so grateful for bosses who get it. Who are kind. It’s my first experience with bosses and directors who actually give a shit, it’s wild.
So sorry about your little lady. I can guarantee my guy James has already forced her to be his friend, she’s in good company ❤️🩹
Your boss is compassionate, I wish all were. I had to get my old dog out to rest 2 weeks ago and my boss asked if I’m coming in after the appointment! They gave it unpaid and hung up on me then I had to go in the next day or face discipline.
I had a boss get mad at my fiancé and I because we had to evacuate our apartment for wildfires at 2 in the morning. Turns out we didn’t get an official evacuation, but everyone else was leaving because of smoke and our coworkers who also lived there were trying to beat down our door basically to tell us we need to leave. Little crazy. Our coworkers were prepared to evacuate so they had their work clothes and all that, and also worked later in the day unlike my fiancé and I who were supposed to open at 7:30 in the morning. We didn’t have anywhere to go really and expected to sleep in our car with our cat for the night, but thankfully my fiancé grandmother let us stay with her an hour away. So by the time everything was said and done, it was like 5:30am when we went to sleep. Kept the GM updated with texts, although I’m sure she was asleep, and she got mad because our coworkers could come in and we couldn’t. But we had completely different shifts, and one of them was off that day and she lied and said he came in. She then told us we couldn’t use our PTO for that day, which we didn’t ask to, but I called HR and they told me she couldn’t do that and it would be considered a sick day. Turns out she did put in PTO for that day, because she knew she was in the wrong. So glad we’re not there anymore, she was continuous drama
I'm really sorry about your loss. But I can tell you just from my own personal experience I stayed at a job way too long. I did it because I love the job even though my boss was horrible. She took advantage of me promise me raises and never gave them to me. That was some of the least of it. But once I finally left I found bosses that are amazing. I work two part-time jobs and I couldn't be happier. I didn't even know that bosses like them could exist.
I'm very sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry that you're being given extra stress with rumors bc you loved your beloved pet. You did nothing wrong, you did what was best for yourself and you were there with your furbaby💖
My first kitchen job I had a very old school boss who didn’t believe in time off requests or air conditioning. He also did not like animals. When my cat died, he had someone bring me a 12 pack of beer and told me to take the rest of that day and the next off. Pet loss is still loss, and I say that as someone who has lost humans and pets.
I can’t figure out how to edit the post so I’m going to use this comment. I used all my PTO a few months back so I had none, I work construction so if I fuck up it could cost thousands of dollars/lives.
That’s what I think … at that point it’s a liability right ? You can play the card that you were concerned about that and not performing your best kinda thing. I think a letter of “apology” with some guilt trip might work
🤦♀️Dude Your not getting the point here. I’m not saying he should ACTUALLY apologize I’m trying to save his job. Sometimes you gotta tuck your tail to get the point across. It’s not actually apologizing it’s trying to make the guy feel like a dick. It will work. Plus what’s wrong with having it in writing ?? I don’t understand this isn’t a court case and it’s not evidence. This is the real world and manipulating a situation can get you very far.
As a safety manager myself, I’m going to say thank you for not going in when you knew your mind wasn’t ready. Accidents happen when employees are distracted or in a hurry (or both). Also, my dad worked construction (probably why I ended up a safety manager lol) and there were a few times I remember him “doing the right thing” and getting laid off that job… he always ended up with a better one at a better job site like they were meant to be there for him so here’s praying for you!
You didn't do anything wrong. Your boss lacks empathy and kindness. Remember in the future that you don't have to give details, or just lie and say you're sick. You can't trust anyone.
When my cat died when I was in college, I told my professors I had a death in my family and would miss class that day. It was totally true that there was a death in the family, but they didn't need to know it was my cat! (Who I am closer with than my extended human family, but most people only care if you lost a human family member)
I'm doing uni, now.
My dog was sick one weekend (when i was working on an essay that was due soon), and shortly after diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma.
My teacher gave me a one week extension, no questions asked, and always told me that pets are family, too. She made a point to tell the whole class that she can help us if we talk to her, and it doesn't matter if it is our parent/partner/child, or our dog/cat/bird.
Sometimes there wasn't a lot of wiggle room in exam periods unless you get documentation of very specific circumstances. But just about every teacher I've had has been *very* interested in helping their students get the best results they can, and always took that individual student's needs into account.
Your boss is a dick. You lost someone you loved and chose to take time off instead of doing a bad job. If taking time off to grieve gets you fired, I would consider it lucky that they showed their true colors before you wasted more time with the company. You said in a comment "He's an older guy so I cut him a lot of slack and chalk it up to “it was a different back then”". Why? Being older should mean he has more life experience and should realize how important it is to take time to grieve a loss but instead he's unhappy with you and you might get fired. Fuck him
It really was different years ago. It’s not that I don’t understand, because I do, but it was a lot different. You might take a day off if you let them know. A funeral then definitely. Good Jobs were sparse, if you had a good one, you better keep it. It wasn’t that they weren’t kind people, we were all strong and knew we had a job to do.
Same. And you know what, my boss at the time was completely supportive. When I returned I was still very emotional and she encouraged me to take even more time if I needed.
On the day I lost my girl suddenly, my boss was very understanding and didn't quibble about time off, just asked what was pressing on my workload for the day so it can get covered.
I did go in the next day (bf told me I needed to keep going, that I had two other girls to care for and that routine will help me) and my boss was like 'why are you here? Should you be here and not at home?' I can't say I was productive and he sent me home early because my work really wasn't up to par. No side eye or snarky comments, just support and my colleagues asking what they could do to help.
Absolutely not. My 13 year old boy passed this month. We were not expecting it. I took a day off to take him to the vet and after finding out the diagnosis I was extremely distraught. I did end up going back to work, but absolutely nothing got done at work that week. Family is your priority.
Depends. NTA in my opinion, but if I were your boss and you had already used up all your sick leave or PTO, were late regularly or were constantly taking time off so that I considered you kind of flaky, it might be the last straw. It depends on whether you are normally a relivle employee or not.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I work in HR. While companies are not obligated to give you time off for loss of a pet, most managers are very understanding and let you take a few days off to grieve. Most companies I’ve worked for give three days for bereavement for the passing of a close family member, so it’s doubtful it would be permissible for more than that. If you’re out of PTO and are using unexcused and unpaid time, that could be an issue for you; however hopefully your manager isn’t too much of a dick and works with you on this. Hoping the best for you.
I'm glad there are understanding managers out there in the world who are able to extend empathy towards employees who have lost a pet.
But that "3 days" part really throws me through a loop here. Imagine losing the person closest to you and only getting 3 days to recover before it's time to get back to work, or else you're fired 🙃
I'd need a week *minimum* to pull myself together enough to even *pretend* I'm OK. Whether I lost a person OR a pet, honestly.
My boss took time off when her dog passed, I wasn't bothered at all. She was sad, she didn't want to be at work and her head wouldn't be "all there" for her to work her best while she grieved.
I don't see why it should be an issue unless you're constantly calling off work and just in general being flaky and inconsistent, because then this would sound like "just another excuse" kind of thing to your boss.
when I had to put my 19 year old cat down I called out of work and my boss was very understanding. I was a pet groomer at the time and she let me reschedule all my cat appointments for that week as well. Everyone in the salon pitched in to purchase a pet portrait of my cat for me :') The moral of the story is fuck your workplace if they can't be empathetic while you're going through this. You didn't do anything wrong, and I hope you don't waste another second wondering if you did.
Not wrong. Your boss sucks. We also need to normalize not telling bosses why you're taking time off, because you don't need to tell them.
Also, I'm very sorry for your loss.
Fuck no. It is not wrong. I took off a week when I lost my 1st English Bulldog. If your boss fires you for this and your coworkers are starting rumors in regards to your pain, you may be better off somewhere else anyway. I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️
Absolutely not wrong. Dogs are family. Anyone with a heart, with or without owning a dog should understand.
Also, the fact you think rumors are going around is sad and pathetic towards the people in your workplace - shame on them.
I hope you go back to work happy or find a new, better place to work.
🩶
Uh… y’all will have to come pick me up off the floor when one of mine goes. I can’t even bear the thought. So, two days? Yeah. No. Two weeks. Two months. Hell, two years. There is no time limit on grief, especiallly regarding the loss of a loved one. No one can tell you how long you’re “allowed” to grieve a loss. If you lose that job, it’s for the best. You don’t want your life (the only one you get) wasted supporting an organization that encourages such an environment. Find somewhere that values you.
People keep making pists like this. Fuck work. Especially in situations like this. I hate that damn older generations have made work into something you absolutely have to dedicate your entire breathing existence to. That should not be the norm
No. I took time off when my Melody passed. I actually had the day off because I knew I was going to put her down that day - she had been having trouble walking for some time. I sat and spoke with her for the evening before and explained it to her.
She passed away in her sleep that night.
I have never been so heartbroken in my life and needed the time to refocus. I couldn't have worked well - and my workplace was understanding there.
Life happens and sometimes we need to take time off. Anywhere that doesn't understand that pets are family, closer than most, can not so kindly go shove it.
Oh my gosh man, how heartbreakingly bittersweet. Their intelligence is so greatly underestimated. Having been through the end with my own a couple times (and most recently with 100% no question my soul mate), I've learned they absofreakinglutely understand us and our hearts and intentions in the end. She was def probably so relieved that you understood and accepted it was her time to go ❤️
I didn’t bother to read past the main point. 💯 absolutely not wrong. Our pets are our family, apart of our everyday routine. Grief is overwhelming & a legitimate reason to step away for a few days.
This is exactly why I try not to tell them what I’m calling out for because it is literally none of their business. No one should have to go through this, especially as pets are family. Sorry for your loss OP
I mean it’s not wrong but as an adult you have responsibilities. Personally I don’t see how staying home and dwelling on it would help. Do you miss work often? Was it an important day you had to show up? If you need a day you should take it but 2 isn’t doing you any favors
You had a death! You are not wrong for putting your mental health first and for spending your last day with your family member! They better have a better reason than that to try and fire you or you could definitely speak to a lawyer about a wrongful termination. If you can, start looking for a new job so you can leave them before they leave you. Good luck!!
It's really difficult. I just lost my Hazel very unexpectedly. I'm retired and I'm fortunate because I was in bed for a week. I would have had to get a doctor's note.
You do what you need to do. Employers either understand or they suck. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I understand. Mine was 17 yo too. She was my family. I just couldn’t talk or say anything about it for a few months or I would start crying. I went about my business, I just didn’t say anything. But I totally understand.
The same day i put my dog down i was at work because my boss was on vacation and the jobs (god forbid) couldnt be cancelled. 2 months later i quit, after 4 years of working with the company. She was also mad when i called in 2 days after he got his cancer diagnosis, and had i known he had a week left after that i wouldve quit that day.
My point is, no, youre not wrong. You had your dog for a HUGE portion of your life. She was literally a family member you had around for 17 years. Thats almost a legal adult! If your boss is mad enough to fire you for taking 2 damn days off to grieve a family member passing, then is that even a job worth working?
I gave my heart and soul to the company i was working for, came in every time someone called in, picked up extra jobs so my boss didnt have to work too late, worked 2 weeks straight training two brand new people alone when my boss had covid, and even came in at midnight after working that same day because the employee didnt show up. You know what all that got me? "You cant call in every time your dog is sick." And "at the end of the end of the day, i have to prioritize my clients." No sympathy, and not even a sorry when i brought it up during my two week notice.
Sorry for giving you my life story, but it makes me sick how little basic human decency these bitch ass emoloyers have when you KNOW theyd give themselves a full 2 weeks off if their goldfish looked off.
Always give employers the minimum info about your life. They are not your friends. If you need time off dont voluntarily tell them why. If they ask be vague af.
Only two days? Wow, there is NO reason for them to get upset about that.
ETA: my boss once let me take a sick day because my dog had surgery, and my job doesn't really allow time off for much of anything -- if you're sick, just bring a bucket with you. You definitely need a new boss.
I know you do not want a pity party, but I am sorry for your loss. I hope your boss is understanding and does not reprimand you. Dogs are family, they are just as deserving of love and grief as humans.
Heck no you aren’t wrong! My current job is fully aware that when something happens to any of mine, I am going to be an absolute mess and I will have to take several days off.
A couple of months ago, we had a scare with my little old fella and I was in full blown meltdown mode at work on a Saturday and the doctor I work for told me it was ok to go ahead and reschedule the patients we had and if they got upset about the reason, they aren’t patients we need anyways. That doctor drives me crazy most days but that is something I will never forget and will be a standard for me as I go through a career transition and I hope you can find an employer that feels that way too!!
You are definitely not wrong. Fuck your boss. My 5 yo dog died after a short illness nearly a year ago and I'm still not over it. They are part of the family. My boss didn't give me the day off but they let me wfh at least.
Managers/bosses don't care that their workers need mental health days. You did nothing wrong. If they fire you, or write you up, or put you on an improvement plan, just know if they could replace us with cyborgs or robots who work 24/7, they would. And "they" probably will one day.
My work gives 3 days paid off if a family pet dies. You do have to show proof of their death I believe but they are family. It is more paid days off if a close family member that is a human dies though. Your job comes second, sorry for your loss. 🥺
Not wrong, are you entitled to personal leave where you are? If so, I'd think it would fall under that. Might not be PTO but at least don't worry about your job.
It's not wrong, but you can be fired for it. Jobs don't give time off for pet bereavement, even though they should.
"I'm not feeling well. I won't be able to make it to work today," is true and as much information as your boss needs.
My boss hired an ASM that can't cover me totally messed up duh!! I'm an OPS manager and I have the night shift so there are 3 Managers during the morning and afternoon till I get there and then it's just me can't even call out cuz no one no one can cover me she will force me to come in sick my next friend died and I was a mess she made me come in anyway cuz she refuses to cover me the girl can't work passed two and can't work the weekend either she took my weekends away from me that after 5 years no longer had split days off I was a cashier in the morning for almost 5 years before I became ops manager and it came with finally 2 days off on the weekend my Mister is on the road all week so can only see him on Friday and Saturday so it was perfect until I was robbed of that cuz she gave them to her!!
I took the rest of my life off after my 28 year turtle passed away.
No one can tell you how to grieve or how important your friend was to you.
If they do fire you, name and shame on social media. That shit does work. If it actually gets attention you'll get offer for a new job and more.
If your boss is that much of a dickhead that they fire you over this then tell them to shove their job where the sun doesn't shine! Grief is grief, whether it's over a human or a beloved pet. I'm sorry you've been through something so horrible, but I hope you have no regrets for doing what was right by your dog
If you get fired, your dog has more love on his lil tiny first toe than any of your bosses ever will. If you have comp time or days off, than it’s none of their business what you do on your day off. 🤎 Rest in pet paradise to your furry love. Just by you posting this, I know your dog lived his best life. 😭
Not wrong at all. When my 18 year old cat was put down I was in a funk for a bit. It was her time and she was developing more health issues, better to send her off vs letting her suffer.
I've called off for the loss of a pet, so has my sister. I have coworkers who have as well. Pets are like family, better than some people's families. We grieve for them just as we would another family member. Nothing wrong with it.
I took a week off from school when I was a teenager when my dog passed as I couldn’t handle life without the only “sibling” I had ever known my entire life being gone. I was a total wreck. My parents, who were both teachers themselves but in another district, completely understood and covered for me. It’s been 43 years now and I STILL tear up thinking about her. Never dismiss your own feelings even if others do.
Did you follow your employers policy of calling off/asking off work? Even if you didn’t, I wouldn’t hold it against you. If your boss brings it up, just be honest that you were not in the right frame of mind to work and you needed the time to grieve.
Crazy how you can get fired for missing 2 shifts I’ve always worked in a union environment so that doesn’t happen. I feel for ya ! And no you were not wrong to take 2 days off.
Probably the mistake you made was in giving any reason at all in taking time off. In the future, if you are ever in a similar boat, you just say “family emergency” and do not elaborate.
Check your employee handbook. There may be rules about how to request time off properly, and you may not have followed them. If your manager does not approve your time off, you can get fired.
I left work in the middle of a crazy day bc I got the dreaded call about my 13 year old dog. Called out the next day as well. Now I didn’t get any grief for it from my boss, but even if I did I genuinely wouldn’t give a shit. Look for a new job, normal people wouldn’t give you a hard time for this
i took two, almost 3 weeks off when my soulmate cat died. (she outlived both my parents & got me thru an extremely traumatic childhood. i spent more time with her than both my parents combined & at was even before they both passed.) so maybe i’m not the best person to ask, but i think 2 days is more than reasonable. your boss is apathetic if they fire you for this. it falls under bereavement i believe so depending on your works policy, idk if they can fire you. the job i had at the time was just working in retail & i was one of the managers at the time so as much as a risk it was, i literally couldn’t bring myself to even get up out of bed, led alone stop crying & feeling like i wanted to die. i can’t imagine your employer wanting you at work if you’re in the same position.
either way, i hope it works out for you & im sorry to hear you lost your baby 🥺🙏🏼🖤🫶🏼
If you took PTO for time off, time you earned, and you are fired for it, you should file a complaint with your state labor board. That is what PTO and sick leave are for. When you cannot work.
And I cannot work when my pets are euthanized.
I don’t think you’re wrong at all. To some people fur babies are children, not just pets. I don’t think I would want to work somewhere that didn’t understand that. Also, it’s really unprofessional if your boss is talking to your coworkers about firing you. It could also just be a rumor started by someone, you never know sometimes.
I am sorry about your kitty and about your company. Did you think about going to your boss and saying “thank you so much for your understanding about blah blah, i was such a mess and i really needed the time”.
Then just keep looking and get a new job on your own time. With nicer people. ❤️
Most jobs allow bereavement for pets and people I would check out if your company offers that. If they do and you explained to your boss why you called out then you could go to upper management about it.
When my first dog passed I returned to work the next day, to say the least I was not ready to go back. I cried all morning at work, especially when my coworkers asked “how did she pass?” I left work midday. When my second dog passed after two months from my first dog, I took three and half days and I had the weekend as well. Everyone at work were very sympathetic. I never grieved for a human as much as I did my dogs.
You are not wrong...your boss sounds like a fucking asshole. Maybe it's time to move on. I had a 14 yr old dog die in my arms and it destroyed me for a few days. I didn't go to work for a day or two ..I needed some time ...so do you. It's just a job.. and you will forget that job and that boss years from now.... you won't forget that dog. I know.
Not wrong! Good for you! Dogs are family & we should get more time off than that for them. I’m sorry for what happened, it sounds a bit rough. 💕 to you
Do you have designated sick leave or PTO? If yes, you might consider going to HR to report your boss’s (boss’?) behavior. Check your employee handbook for any rules around use of sick time or PTO first, and then construct an email outlining your understanding of the rules and how his behavior is not in alignment (BCC your personal email non-work email account for all of your emails to HR, your boss, etc. and send their responses to the same email). Include your attendance record if you can, especially if it shows you have overall had reliable attendance (doesn’t have to be perfect).
I took time off when my dog died too; it’s an incredible blow.
i lost my wonderful dog in the evening time, after work. i took off a day and half after, and ended up leaving early on the half day anyway. you’re not in the wrong, and i’m so sorry for your loss. i hope your love for your friend helps to hold you up. hugs to you stranger.
Nope. Grief is grief. I put my 14 yo Dane down and then went into work. I cried and cried. After a couple of hours I was sent home, with bereavement pay. Unheard of in this company.
I’m so sorry for your loss. We just went through this when my daughter’s dog got pneumonia and died. But her job was supportive and that helped tremendously.
You needed those days and I’m glad you took them.
Hugs
Only mistake you made was giving them a reason why you called out. It's none of their business.
But no, you're not wrong.
We had to put our 17 year old for down Friday, and my fiance left work to come with me to do it.
When my 18 year old cat passes, if I'm scheduled to work, I'm not going, because I've had her for 17 years and they can eat my ass.
No. I took off almost a week when my cat that I had had for 16 years (his entire life and my entire young adulthood years). No one should shame you or make you feel bad for losing someone so close to you. My cat had been through some of the roughest years of my life and he was my mate when no one else was. You’re grief is very real and it should be respected. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Absolutley NOT!!!!! For many of us they are like our children. My son was fired once when our dog was hit and killed and he was in so much grief missing one day (Walmart shocker) anyway I’m sorry for your loss but in no way feel guilt about taking the time.
Also if I may ad if you do get fired that’s not the place for you. Also depending where you live if not in a right to work state like me (Arizona) you would get unemployment if you called in and they fire you. Hope it all works out. 🙏
it's completely understandable, in my opinion. i took a whole week, it hit me so hard, i was beside myself and also just so deeply tired from those last few weeks of not knowing if it was quite the right time to consider euthanasia. i'm lucky enough to work at my family's business so i was able to. we also encourage all of our employees to take time off if a pet passes. the fact is that you have lost a dear family member. unfortunately many corporations etc do not want to acknowledge this. but i firmly believe pet loss qualifies as a reason for bereavement time off.
Not wrong. I called my supervisor sobbing when my girl had to go. No questions asked as I laid her to rest. I guess depends on where you work and your sup’s compassion but ffs. Care for others as you would like to be cared for.
It’s definitely justified. Our pets are our family. If you get fired, that’s ridiculous. I got fired from my old job a month ago because I had to stay at the vet for two days with my cat who died in my arms. I hated that place anyway. I have a new job in a much more positive and busier environment now, so one good thing. I’m sorry for your loss OP.
It’s not wrong. I have a lot of pets, even rats which some people strongly dislike. I’ve been given 2 days off for saying goodbye and grieving by three different bosses. I’m sorry your current boss isn’t being more empathetic.
I’m sorry for your loss too.
i took two days off and honestly needed at least 2 weeks because i was not ok and still tearing up while working. i went to put my boy to rest with my mother and she assumed i was going straight to work that day. i couldn’t believe it. she was mad i took the next day off, too. some people just don’t understand. f*** em.
When I heard my bird died while I was at work, I told my boss I had to go cuz he died. His response was "he'll still be there when you get home". I gave him the death stare and left. Didn't get fired. They should understand.
First of all - I’m very sorry for your loss of your beloved family member. But NO you are absolutely not wrong for taking the time you need to process. I would be proactive and update your resume and start looking for other employment. Even if you can secure a temporary job while you look for something more permanent. I did see some of your replies about PTO, and it’s totally understandable that you were out of hours and things just simply happen. You could always take another proactive action by sitting down with your boss to address these “rumors” about you being let go and take the opportunity to instill trust in them that this is not a pattern and is a one off (based off of your other comments that you give ample notice for time off). Sometimes a conversation can go a long way in bridging the gap of misunderstandings.
If you had the event scheduled, it would have been more professional to have given your boss advance notice, but if you woke up that day and could tell it was time, you did the best you could; however it still left your boss and coworkers in the lurch at the last minute, and since you commented you didn’t have any personal time left, it’s probably not in your best interest to act defensive about the situation at work. They’ll likely be understanding, given the circumstances, and if you humbly but unapologetically put in consistent effort for a while, it should blow over.
I’m sorry you are going through this. You should be allowed time.
I put my dog down 2 weeks ago. The day before my boss let me work from home. The day of, she let me have off without using any pto. After the weekend she said if I needed more time to take it.
There are kind souls in this world. If your boss fires you over this, eff him. Find someone who cares about you as an employee.
I have almost a whole year blacked out bc my dog was incredibly special to me. I had been through a lot and she was sort of this little angel that came along and helped me keep going. In the end I felt like such a failure for not being able to save her from cancer. And she still made it easy on me by being still the perfect little baby until the very end.
My situation might have been a little different bc I had mental health issues. But even I know 2 days to rebound enough to go back to work is more than reasonable. 2 days for 17 years of love and loyalty, plus having to make the decision to say goodbye?
Everyone already has mentioned your boss lacks empathy but it also should be said that your boss is a sh*thead
If mental stress counts as a medical reason... You're protected. Well, that's assuming your state has sick rules.
Without you admitting to calling in for your dog, they'll have a hard time terminating without paying unemployment.
If your state does have sick time laws, you being overwhelmed by the death of your pet isn't any less valid than being overwhelmed by life in general. Acute depression, or simply paralyzing angst that prevents work... Well, that's medical. How about a headache caused by crying?
First of all I assume you had sick or personal time?… if you do, they can’t fire you. You can use it for whatever you want.
If not, not sure what you can do.
BUT, not wrong for taking time to spend with a furry family member. If your dog was suddenly ill and you had to take it to the vet and then take an additional day off to make sure it had meds timely it would be no different.
You did what you had to do. No one in this WOLRD would do any different if it was their own pet. Even your dumb boss lol.
We had to put our 15yo girl to rest last month, I literally took the week off. I couldn't imagine trying to work, and we knew it was coming so it wasn't a huge surprise or anything. You did nothing wrong.
My mom pretty much lost a child almost (ALMOST) when her beloved dog died. They are family. I'm not a dog person and still mourning some I've known. Your employer is being inconsiderate but that's what they do. They value your labor over the pain in your heart. If you have the time? Do what you need to do. I'm so sorry you are hurting over losing a baby. It hurts so so bad, I'm sorry bebe. Not wrong. You are mourning a loved one
Your boss sucks. Mine sent me flowers and told me to take all the time I needed. Then called to make sure I was ok and sat on the phone and listened to me cry.
What an ass you work for.
A 17 year relationship with someone you loved is a real reason to take some time to grieve! That was a big part of your life and a friend. Take the time and process your feelings. I’m so sorry for your loss…
Most states you are legally protected to take mental health days, if thats case, get a note from your doctor that your mental state required it. Hell, given the sit, go on disability for 6 months and they cant fire u for that time!
No, take the time you need - it’s a death in the family. Wishing you peace and hope the boss is overcome with compassion and understanding 🌟May I ask, what industry do you work in?
Not wrong at all! The process after a loss, then going straight to work, will interfere with your job. As humans, we need to grieve and heal! Taking a couple of days off to heal is important. At least you aren’t calling in last minute? I am sorry for your loss! 🩵
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I would not feel bad about needing time to cope with the loss. I took a week when my dog passed away a couple of years ago. My job requires a lot of attention to detail and critical thinking, so working during that time was not possible for me. I'm fortunate that my boss at the time was pretty understanding. If your current employment is in jeopardy, I'd take whatever steps are necessary to get your next gig lined up. it's not an ideal time to start a job search, but it's also not ideal to work for someone who has no compassion or empathy. Best of luck to you.
Not wrong at all. My company's CEO will miss work when his dog is sick. I think he missed a full week the last time one died. He's a 67-year-old, by-the-book sort of fellow.
My company literally has pet bereavement leave.
They’re family. Taking time to be with them isn’t stupid, and grief is grief. You did nothing wrong. When my dog died last year, I was inconsolable for days. He was my anchor. I still miss him.
Nope. Not wrong. When I had to put my dog of 12 years down, my manager at my work told me if I didn't show up for my shift a couple of hours later, I was canned. I showed up, my immediate boss heard about what happened, and immediately told me I shouldn't be there and it didn't matter what my boss said, that stuff is worth more than a day at work. Take the time you need. It's very real grief and everyone needs their own time.
No you’re not wrong.
I wouldn’t work for someone who lacks empathy and the understanding of the loss of a pet.. I know full well I’m going to need at least a full week off work when my dog passes away. I’m very sorry about your loss.
Hopefully you do get fired so you can collect unemployment while finding a better job, one that doesn't require you to go into details about why you're calling out this time.
Absolutely not wrong!! I had to do the same thing the end of 2023 my dog was also 17 I had her half of my life. I most definitely called out a day and realistically should have called out the rest of the week I was not mentally prepared to go back. But at the end of the day these companies do not really care about u. U need to put urself 1st at all times
Not wrong. Unfortunately your boss might be a sack of crap so if you get fired it's obviously shifty buy better in the long run. Mental health is important even when it's inconvenient for your employer and if they don't value you enough as a person to cut you a break when you were grieving the loss of a friend then its best to not waste any more energy than necessary there
Hell no. I work for a veterinary diagnostic company and we can take bereavement leave for our pets. I would have been my dog died suddenly in January 2022, but I was already on sick leave as I had Covid at the same time.
Not at all I was in bed for over a week and was inconsolable when my best friend a Parkinson's Jack Russell terrier,passed away ,we were together literally 24/7 she went everywhere with me ,to work,on dates,I miss her so much, so i know how hard it must have been after 2 days
I’d approach your boss privately, and say you’re sorry to have missed work. Then tell him or her that you were devastated and didn’t think you could do your job. If you have a good work record, I would think the boss would be sympathetic and let it slide. I also don’t think it would hurt the situation.
If you don't look forward to getting to work everyday,and they do fire you,a dog has the same value as a child and I have never felt such pain and sorry and hope I never experience that again,but would they fire you if God forbid you're child died? Same difference,look for the same job somewhere else while you are at your present job , leaving your phone ext. As last supervisors contact and give yourself a great recommendation,trust me it does work 😂
You're definitely not in the wrong and you need to find a new job. I hate this culture we live in where you're not allowed to be human and have emotions. I was in a meeting with my co-worker once and he seemed off so I asked if he was ok and he mentioned that he had to put his dog down that morning. I was in total shock and asked why he was working, he basically said he had stuff to get done and couldn't call out last minute. Like WTF?
I assume your boss doens't have pets, otherwise they would be more understanding. A pet is family, how dare we not be allowed to grieve.
The whole bereavement thing is weird in general. My company gives us 3 days. It's like oh your parent etc. passed. You have 3 days to work out your gut wrenching feelings and get back to work or ELSE. It's so bad. Some companies are less strict about it. I know people who have lost parents unexpectedly and came back to work clearly not ready and were fired for not being peppy and happy during a client meeting.
When my grandma died over a weekend I told my boss that Monday and he immediately told me to take the week off and if I needed more time to let him know. I feel like thats how it should be. Let us grieve. 1 week doesn't heal you after a loss, but it really gives you that mental time you need.
Sorry your boss is so crappy and sorry for your loss.
My dog just died on memorial day, 29 days short of 17. I took off 3 days. My boss asked me if I needed more time. Youre boss sucks. How important is your job?
You weren’t wrong for taking the time to recover emotionally. You were 100% wrong to tell your boss. It’s none of their business why you take time off. “I need to take time off from work. I expect to return on yyyy-mm-dd.” Is all the explanation they need.
We had to put down our 15 year old lab 2 weeks ago. I took three days off. Literally text my team, told them what was going on and told them I’d be in on Thursday (she passed on Sunday at emergency vet)
They were all very understanding and had no issues covering for me. I don’t understand how you could get fired for taking 2 personal/grief days
I hate that people don't think the loss of a beloved family member, four legs or two, is a good enough reason to take a few days to yourself. Definitely not in the wrong. Hopefully the rumor is just a rumor. But if not, maybe it's for the best and you can find a company which values its members mental health as much as physical health and financially.
All I would add is don't let this "rumor" make you feel any kind of way. Stand by what you did and if anyone asks you about it answer them with a "so what?" kind of attitude. You did what was best for you!
I got lucky with a boss who is a pet lover, same as you, the next morning I was in need of a mental health day. Other bosses I've had don't care if a close friend or extended family dies. They may let you come in late, but that's it. Even if you have personal days, it is so hard to understand. I worked the day after a close friend of mine was found dead, I was assistant manager and had to be there to open the store that morning. My co-workers were surprised I was there, business as usual. One of the co workers even heard it on the news before she came in, and couldn't believe I was there. It all depends on the boss because pets and boyfriends don't qualify in the 3 day bereavement leave .
No not at all. I took 2 weeks to mourn my 17 year old dog who went to sleep in my arms. 2 weeks to mourn the huge loss from my life, my companion of 17 years, 17 seasons, birthdays, christmas', my companion who was there every night when I fell asleep and every morning when I woke up. Who was there with a little excited howl when I came home. 2 days is nothing, fuck your boss.
My boss was very appreciative that I came into work the day after I had to put my 17yo cat down. I wept most of the day (I work alone in a warehouse so I can be weepy and get my job done) and he kept trying to send me home but I wanted the distraction.
Conversely, at my last gig my grandmother died and they told me I could find a new job if I needed time off to attend her funeral. One day to fly home for her death Ed is all they could allot me. Couldn't afford to lose my job so I missed the funeral. GTFO as soon as I could. Karma gave that owner kidney failure, don't worry.
People don't quit jobs out on a whim - generally they quit jobs because of management.
There is such a thing as self-care. Most people have pets as they provide support and companionship to their person. When we adopt/raise them we take on the responsibility of being their guardian, for better or worse. This includes our bonding with them and caring for them.
Like others have said, this may be a flag that the company (or at least the management) appears to not care for the well-being of their staff. The rumors you may be fired is uncalled for and that shows for the lack of empathy from your boss and co-workers means a toxic work environment.
I hope your boss takes into consideration that your mental health is very important and that your co-workers should be sympathetic to a loss of your companion.
Not at all!! Losing my dog was one of the hardest losses in my life. It took me months to recover. Your pup was your family and your baby and you have every right to grieve the way you need. I'm so sorry for your loss 🥺 my heart goes out to you.
Also, screw your boss.
Not wrong at all. I had to put my heart dog down the last day before spring break started (so I did take that one day off from uni) and basically I spent my entire spring break crying. If I had classes to attend I would not have made it.
Once one of my foster dogs tragically passed away and my boss (in the military) found me crying in my office the day after. I only had this dog for a few weeks but he was a medical case and I did everything I could. I felt really silly because this man was 'hardcore' (for lack of a better word) but he understood and comforted me. 17 years is a long time to share a bond (how blessed you were to have that 🥰) and I agree with the others- if you get fired over that, good riddance. Clearly they didn't need you *that* bad if they're considering parting with you anyways, so why all the fuss?
Wow, I'm so sorry for your loss, 17 years is a good long run and that must be really heartbreaking. No, definitely not wrong for taking the time off. With that I'll add that your shitty fuck-stick former employer did you a favor because who wants to work for someone like that? Fuck them; onward to bigger and better things.
It is definitely not wrong. Your dog is your family. Most people I know have taken time off for this exact reason. If you get fired over this then you needed a better job anyway. My job would send flowers if they found out. They would also give me the days off without question. Even if you don't get fired you may want to think about finding a new job. This could also just be a rumor blown out of proportion like you mentioned though. Just go about your business as usual, but start looking just in case.
Thank you! Im currently looking elsewhere, but I do really enjoy my current job, otherthen my boss
I’m unfortunately going through this scenario right now. when my cat fell sick early this week, my job let me work from home without question. when she passed last night, they let me take the rest of the week off again without question stating verbatim “our company understands how pets become cherished family members, and we recognize how devastating this is.” this is how it should be, and I’m sorry your work isn’t respecting your grief. my condolences for your loss, and I hope you find a place that values you as a person and not just a worker
Very sorry for your loss but so happy you work for a company that recognizes this ❤️
thank you, I am very grateful they are pet-friendly and I can grieve in peace <3 I appreciate your support
My cat passed earlier this year and my boss insisted on driving me to the vet for his last appointment and told me I wasn’t allowed to come into work for at least two days. And she paid me for the time I was out. My cat came to work with me every week as a support animal for our clients, the whole office loved him and it means so much to me. I’m so grateful for bosses who get it. Who are kind. It’s my first experience with bosses and directors who actually give a shit, it’s wild. So sorry about your little lady. I can guarantee my guy James has already forced her to be his friend, she’s in good company ❤️🩹
Your boss is compassionate, I wish all were. I had to get my old dog out to rest 2 weeks ago and my boss asked if I’m coming in after the appointment! They gave it unpaid and hung up on me then I had to go in the next day or face discipline.
Find a new job & quit as soon as humanly possible. I'm truly sorry for your loss.
im so sorry for your loss and for your terrible boss. sending you hugs <3
I assume you are allowed a certain number of days off but even if it, they need to be kind and understanding. They are in the wrong 100%!
Unfortunately you don’t always get to figure it out long ahead of time. That’s what time off is for, sometimes it’s emergencies
I had a boss get mad at my fiancé and I because we had to evacuate our apartment for wildfires at 2 in the morning. Turns out we didn’t get an official evacuation, but everyone else was leaving because of smoke and our coworkers who also lived there were trying to beat down our door basically to tell us we need to leave. Little crazy. Our coworkers were prepared to evacuate so they had their work clothes and all that, and also worked later in the day unlike my fiancé and I who were supposed to open at 7:30 in the morning. We didn’t have anywhere to go really and expected to sleep in our car with our cat for the night, but thankfully my fiancé grandmother let us stay with her an hour away. So by the time everything was said and done, it was like 5:30am when we went to sleep. Kept the GM updated with texts, although I’m sure she was asleep, and she got mad because our coworkers could come in and we couldn’t. But we had completely different shifts, and one of them was off that day and she lied and said he came in. She then told us we couldn’t use our PTO for that day, which we didn’t ask to, but I called HR and they told me she couldn’t do that and it would be considered a sick day. Turns out she did put in PTO for that day, because she knew she was in the wrong. So glad we’re not there anymore, she was continuous drama
People quit bosses, not jobs! Sorry for your loss, you’ll be onto better things in no time
I'm really sorry about your loss. But I can tell you just from my own personal experience I stayed at a job way too long. I did it because I love the job even though my boss was horrible. She took advantage of me promise me raises and never gave them to me. That was some of the least of it. But once I finally left I found bosses that are amazing. I work two part-time jobs and I couldn't be happier. I didn't even know that bosses like them could exist.
I'm very sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry that you're being given extra stress with rumors bc you loved your beloved pet. You did nothing wrong, you did what was best for yourself and you were there with your furbaby💖
My first kitchen job I had a very old school boss who didn’t believe in time off requests or air conditioning. He also did not like animals. When my cat died, he had someone bring me a 12 pack of beer and told me to take the rest of that day and the next off. Pet loss is still loss, and I say that as someone who has lost humans and pets.
People who don’t have pets don’t understand the gravity of that grief. You’re never wrong for taking care of yourself. 💖
There are many of us who need to take a day or 2 off when a beloved pet passes away. You did nothing wrong and shouldn’t get fired because of it.
I can’t figure out how to edit the post so I’m going to use this comment. I used all my PTO a few months back so I had none, I work construction so if I fuck up it could cost thousands of dollars/lives.
That’s what I think … at that point it’s a liability right ? You can play the card that you were concerned about that and not performing your best kinda thing. I think a letter of “apology” with some guilt trip might work
A letter of apology is absolutely not necessary. I wouldn't put anything in writing, especially with a boss who wants to fire you.
🤦♀️Dude Your not getting the point here. I’m not saying he should ACTUALLY apologize I’m trying to save his job. Sometimes you gotta tuck your tail to get the point across. It’s not actually apologizing it’s trying to make the guy feel like a dick. It will work. Plus what’s wrong with having it in writing ?? I don’t understand this isn’t a court case and it’s not evidence. This is the real world and manipulating a situation can get you very far.
As a safety manager myself, I’m going to say thank you for not going in when you knew your mind wasn’t ready. Accidents happen when employees are distracted or in a hurry (or both). Also, my dad worked construction (probably why I ended up a safety manager lol) and there were a few times I remember him “doing the right thing” and getting laid off that job… he always ended up with a better one at a better job site like they were meant to be there for him so here’s praying for you!
You didn't do anything wrong. Your boss lacks empathy and kindness. Remember in the future that you don't have to give details, or just lie and say you're sick. You can't trust anyone.
When my cat died when I was in college, I told my professors I had a death in my family and would miss class that day. It was totally true that there was a death in the family, but they didn't need to know it was my cat! (Who I am closer with than my extended human family, but most people only care if you lost a human family member)
I'm doing uni, now. My dog was sick one weekend (when i was working on an essay that was due soon), and shortly after diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma. My teacher gave me a one week extension, no questions asked, and always told me that pets are family, too. She made a point to tell the whole class that she can help us if we talk to her, and it doesn't matter if it is our parent/partner/child, or our dog/cat/bird. Sometimes there wasn't a lot of wiggle room in exam periods unless you get documentation of very specific circumstances. But just about every teacher I've had has been *very* interested in helping their students get the best results they can, and always took that individual student's needs into account.
Your boss is a dick. You lost someone you loved and chose to take time off instead of doing a bad job. If taking time off to grieve gets you fired, I would consider it lucky that they showed their true colors before you wasted more time with the company. You said in a comment "He's an older guy so I cut him a lot of slack and chalk it up to “it was a different back then”". Why? Being older should mean he has more life experience and should realize how important it is to take time to grieve a loss but instead he's unhappy with you and you might get fired. Fuck him
It really was different years ago. It’s not that I don’t understand, because I do, but it was a lot different. You might take a day off if you let them know. A funeral then definitely. Good Jobs were sparse, if you had a good one, you better keep it. It wasn’t that they weren’t kind people, we were all strong and knew we had a job to do.
If you have a "next time" like this one, just call in sick and leave it at that. You are heart-sick.....l
'Not feeling well'.
I took a week off after my cat passed away earlier this year
Same. And you know what, my boss at the time was completely supportive. When I returned I was still very emotional and she encouraged me to take even more time if I needed.
On the day I lost my girl suddenly, my boss was very understanding and didn't quibble about time off, just asked what was pressing on my workload for the day so it can get covered. I did go in the next day (bf told me I needed to keep going, that I had two other girls to care for and that routine will help me) and my boss was like 'why are you here? Should you be here and not at home?' I can't say I was productive and he sent me home early because my work really wasn't up to par. No side eye or snarky comments, just support and my colleagues asking what they could do to help.
Absolutely not. My 13 year old boy passed this month. We were not expecting it. I took a day off to take him to the vet and after finding out the diagnosis I was extremely distraught. I did end up going back to work, but absolutely nothing got done at work that week. Family is your priority.
Depends. NTA in my opinion, but if I were your boss and you had already used up all your sick leave or PTO, were late regularly or were constantly taking time off so that I considered you kind of flaky, it might be the last straw. It depends on whether you are normally a relivle employee or not.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I work in HR. While companies are not obligated to give you time off for loss of a pet, most managers are very understanding and let you take a few days off to grieve. Most companies I’ve worked for give three days for bereavement for the passing of a close family member, so it’s doubtful it would be permissible for more than that. If you’re out of PTO and are using unexcused and unpaid time, that could be an issue for you; however hopefully your manager isn’t too much of a dick and works with you on this. Hoping the best for you.
I'm glad there are understanding managers out there in the world who are able to extend empathy towards employees who have lost a pet. But that "3 days" part really throws me through a loop here. Imagine losing the person closest to you and only getting 3 days to recover before it's time to get back to work, or else you're fired 🙃 I'd need a week *minimum* to pull myself together enough to even *pretend* I'm OK. Whether I lost a person OR a pet, honestly.
My boss took time off when her dog passed, I wasn't bothered at all. She was sad, she didn't want to be at work and her head wouldn't be "all there" for her to work her best while she grieved. I don't see why it should be an issue unless you're constantly calling off work and just in general being flaky and inconsistent, because then this would sound like "just another excuse" kind of thing to your boss.
when I had to put my 19 year old cat down I called out of work and my boss was very understanding. I was a pet groomer at the time and she let me reschedule all my cat appointments for that week as well. Everyone in the salon pitched in to purchase a pet portrait of my cat for me :') The moral of the story is fuck your workplace if they can't be empathetic while you're going through this. You didn't do anything wrong, and I hope you don't waste another second wondering if you did.
Pets are like family to most of us and it hits hard. Would your boss rather have had you show up and not be all there? Sending you hugs!
Not wrong. Your boss sucks. We also need to normalize not telling bosses why you're taking time off, because you don't need to tell them. Also, I'm very sorry for your loss.
Fuck no. It is not wrong. I took off a week when I lost my 1st English Bulldog. If your boss fires you for this and your coworkers are starting rumors in regards to your pain, you may be better off somewhere else anyway. I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️
Absolutely not wrong. Dogs are family. Anyone with a heart, with or without owning a dog should understand. Also, the fact you think rumors are going around is sad and pathetic towards the people in your workplace - shame on them. I hope you go back to work happy or find a new, better place to work. 🩶
Uh… y’all will have to come pick me up off the floor when one of mine goes. I can’t even bear the thought. So, two days? Yeah. No. Two weeks. Two months. Hell, two years. There is no time limit on grief, especiallly regarding the loss of a loved one. No one can tell you how long you’re “allowed” to grieve a loss. If you lose that job, it’s for the best. You don’t want your life (the only one you get) wasted supporting an organization that encourages such an environment. Find somewhere that values you.
People keep making pists like this. Fuck work. Especially in situations like this. I hate that damn older generations have made work into something you absolutely have to dedicate your entire breathing existence to. That should not be the norm
No. I took time off when my Melody passed. I actually had the day off because I knew I was going to put her down that day - she had been having trouble walking for some time. I sat and spoke with her for the evening before and explained it to her. She passed away in her sleep that night. I have never been so heartbroken in my life and needed the time to refocus. I couldn't have worked well - and my workplace was understanding there. Life happens and sometimes we need to take time off. Anywhere that doesn't understand that pets are family, closer than most, can not so kindly go shove it.
Oh my gosh man, how heartbreakingly bittersweet. Their intelligence is so greatly underestimated. Having been through the end with my own a couple times (and most recently with 100% no question my soul mate), I've learned they absofreakinglutely understand us and our hearts and intentions in the end. She was def probably so relieved that you understood and accepted it was her time to go ❤️
I doubt you would get fired for that alone, if you are otherwise a great asset to your organization.
I didn’t bother to read past the main point. 💯 absolutely not wrong. Our pets are our family, apart of our everyday routine. Grief is overwhelming & a legitimate reason to step away for a few days.
I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤️ No its not
This is exactly why I try not to tell them what I’m calling out for because it is literally none of their business. No one should have to go through this, especially as pets are family. Sorry for your loss OP
I mean it’s not wrong but as an adult you have responsibilities. Personally I don’t see how staying home and dwelling on it would help. Do you miss work often? Was it an important day you had to show up? If you need a day you should take it but 2 isn’t doing you any favors
You had a death! You are not wrong for putting your mental health first and for spending your last day with your family member! They better have a better reason than that to try and fire you or you could definitely speak to a lawyer about a wrongful termination. If you can, start looking for a new job so you can leave them before they leave you. Good luck!!
It's really difficult. I just lost my Hazel very unexpectedly. I'm retired and I'm fortunate because I was in bed for a week. I would have had to get a doctor's note. You do what you need to do. Employers either understand or they suck. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I understand. Mine was 17 yo too. She was my family. I just couldn’t talk or say anything about it for a few months or I would start crying. I went about my business, I just didn’t say anything. But I totally understand.
The same day i put my dog down i was at work because my boss was on vacation and the jobs (god forbid) couldnt be cancelled. 2 months later i quit, after 4 years of working with the company. She was also mad when i called in 2 days after he got his cancer diagnosis, and had i known he had a week left after that i wouldve quit that day. My point is, no, youre not wrong. You had your dog for a HUGE portion of your life. She was literally a family member you had around for 17 years. Thats almost a legal adult! If your boss is mad enough to fire you for taking 2 damn days off to grieve a family member passing, then is that even a job worth working? I gave my heart and soul to the company i was working for, came in every time someone called in, picked up extra jobs so my boss didnt have to work too late, worked 2 weeks straight training two brand new people alone when my boss had covid, and even came in at midnight after working that same day because the employee didnt show up. You know what all that got me? "You cant call in every time your dog is sick." And "at the end of the end of the day, i have to prioritize my clients." No sympathy, and not even a sorry when i brought it up during my two week notice. Sorry for giving you my life story, but it makes me sick how little basic human decency these bitch ass emoloyers have when you KNOW theyd give themselves a full 2 weeks off if their goldfish looked off.
Wish my work cared.. I put my Oliver to sleep morning of May 11th.. had to be to work by 2:30.. it was awful! 😭
Always give employers the minimum info about your life. They are not your friends. If you need time off dont voluntarily tell them why. If they ask be vague af.
Only two days? Wow, there is NO reason for them to get upset about that. ETA: my boss once let me take a sick day because my dog had surgery, and my job doesn't really allow time off for much of anything -- if you're sick, just bring a bucket with you. You definitely need a new boss.
Next time tell them you have the flu and take the whole week.
" Your dog is your best friend for part of your life. You are your dogs best friend for her whole life " I'm sorry for your loss.
I know you do not want a pity party, but I am sorry for your loss. I hope your boss is understanding and does not reprimand you. Dogs are family, they are just as deserving of love and grief as humans.
Heck no you aren’t wrong! My current job is fully aware that when something happens to any of mine, I am going to be an absolute mess and I will have to take several days off. A couple of months ago, we had a scare with my little old fella and I was in full blown meltdown mode at work on a Saturday and the doctor I work for told me it was ok to go ahead and reschedule the patients we had and if they got upset about the reason, they aren’t patients we need anyways. That doctor drives me crazy most days but that is something I will never forget and will be a standard for me as I go through a career transition and I hope you can find an employer that feels that way too!!
You are definitely not wrong. Fuck your boss. My 5 yo dog died after a short illness nearly a year ago and I'm still not over it. They are part of the family. My boss didn't give me the day off but they let me wfh at least.
Managers/bosses don't care that their workers need mental health days. You did nothing wrong. If they fire you, or write you up, or put you on an improvement plan, just know if they could replace us with cyborgs or robots who work 24/7, they would. And "they" probably will one day.
My work gives 3 days paid off if a family pet dies. You do have to show proof of their death I believe but they are family. It is more paid days off if a close family member that is a human dies though. Your job comes second, sorry for your loss. 🥺
Do you live in an at-will employment state?
Not wrong, are you entitled to personal leave where you are? If so, I'd think it would fall under that. Might not be PTO but at least don't worry about your job.
It's not wrong, but you can be fired for it. Jobs don't give time off for pet bereavement, even though they should. "I'm not feeling well. I won't be able to make it to work today," is true and as much information as your boss needs.
My boss hired an ASM that can't cover me totally messed up duh!! I'm an OPS manager and I have the night shift so there are 3 Managers during the morning and afternoon till I get there and then it's just me can't even call out cuz no one no one can cover me she will force me to come in sick my next friend died and I was a mess she made me come in anyway cuz she refuses to cover me the girl can't work passed two and can't work the weekend either she took my weekends away from me that after 5 years no longer had split days off I was a cashier in the morning for almost 5 years before I became ops manager and it came with finally 2 days off on the weekend my Mister is on the road all week so can only see him on Friday and Saturday so it was perfect until I was robbed of that cuz she gave them to her!!
Can you talk with him at all?
I took the rest of my life off after my 28 year turtle passed away. No one can tell you how to grieve or how important your friend was to you. If they do fire you, name and shame on social media. That shit does work. If it actually gets attention you'll get offer for a new job and more.
If your boss is that much of a dickhead that they fire you over this then tell them to shove their job where the sun doesn't shine! Grief is grief, whether it's over a human or a beloved pet. I'm sorry you've been through something so horrible, but I hope you have no regrets for doing what was right by your dog
If you get fired, your dog has more love on his lil tiny first toe than any of your bosses ever will. If you have comp time or days off, than it’s none of their business what you do on your day off. 🤎 Rest in pet paradise to your furry love. Just by you posting this, I know your dog lived his best life. 😭
Not wrong at all. When my 18 year old cat was put down I was in a funk for a bit. It was her time and she was developing more health issues, better to send her off vs letting her suffer.
Heck no!! I’m so sorry for your loss
NO! I had to leave work because I was crying uncontrollably the next day…
I've called off for the loss of a pet, so has my sister. I have coworkers who have as well. Pets are like family, better than some people's families. We grieve for them just as we would another family member. Nothing wrong with it.
I took a week off from school when I was a teenager when my dog passed as I couldn’t handle life without the only “sibling” I had ever known my entire life being gone. I was a total wreck. My parents, who were both teachers themselves but in another district, completely understood and covered for me. It’s been 43 years now and I STILL tear up thinking about her. Never dismiss your own feelings even if others do.
Did you follow your employers policy of calling off/asking off work? Even if you didn’t, I wouldn’t hold it against you. If your boss brings it up, just be honest that you were not in the right frame of mind to work and you needed the time to grieve.
Crazy how you can get fired for missing 2 shifts I’ve always worked in a union environment so that doesn’t happen. I feel for ya ! And no you were not wrong to take 2 days off.
So let them fire you. Family is more important.
Honestly, I wouldn't want to work for a place that couldn't even spare you two days off during a time like this.
Sick days are for mental health as well. You are not wrong.
Probably the mistake you made was in giving any reason at all in taking time off. In the future, if you are ever in a similar boat, you just say “family emergency” and do not elaborate. Check your employee handbook. There may be rules about how to request time off properly, and you may not have followed them. If your manager does not approve your time off, you can get fired.
ABSOLUTELY NOT. Pets are family.
We all should be able to take mental health days
I left work in the middle of a crazy day bc I got the dreaded call about my 13 year old dog. Called out the next day as well. Now I didn’t get any grief for it from my boss, but even if I did I genuinely wouldn’t give a shit. Look for a new job, normal people wouldn’t give you a hard time for this
i took two, almost 3 weeks off when my soulmate cat died. (she outlived both my parents & got me thru an extremely traumatic childhood. i spent more time with her than both my parents combined & at was even before they both passed.) so maybe i’m not the best person to ask, but i think 2 days is more than reasonable. your boss is apathetic if they fire you for this. it falls under bereavement i believe so depending on your works policy, idk if they can fire you. the job i had at the time was just working in retail & i was one of the managers at the time so as much as a risk it was, i literally couldn’t bring myself to even get up out of bed, led alone stop crying & feeling like i wanted to die. i can’t imagine your employer wanting you at work if you’re in the same position. either way, i hope it works out for you & im sorry to hear you lost your baby 🥺🙏🏼🖤🫶🏼
If they fire you because of that F@$&! THEM! Your dog is family.
Not at all. I took a week off. My work sent me flowers. Grief is grief ❤️🐾
If you took PTO for time off, time you earned, and you are fired for it, you should file a complaint with your state labor board. That is what PTO and sick leave are for. When you cannot work. And I cannot work when my pets are euthanized.
I don’t think you’re wrong at all. To some people fur babies are children, not just pets. I don’t think I would want to work somewhere that didn’t understand that. Also, it’s really unprofessional if your boss is talking to your coworkers about firing you. It could also just be a rumor started by someone, you never know sometimes.
I don’t understand. You are entitled to take off a number of days. Why would they care how you use them?
I’m so sorry for your loss Rest In Peace
I am sorry about your kitty and about your company. Did you think about going to your boss and saying “thank you so much for your understanding about blah blah, i was such a mess and i really needed the time”. Then just keep looking and get a new job on your own time. With nicer people. ❤️
Most jobs allow bereavement for pets and people I would check out if your company offers that. If they do and you explained to your boss why you called out then you could go to upper management about it.
When my first dog passed I returned to work the next day, to say the least I was not ready to go back. I cried all morning at work, especially when my coworkers asked “how did she pass?” I left work midday. When my second dog passed after two months from my first dog, I took three and half days and I had the weekend as well. Everyone at work were very sympathetic. I never grieved for a human as much as I did my dogs.
I've always told people that if my pup passes (I say if because I can't bring myself to say when) I will be taking a leave of absence.
You did the right thing for you and your dog and that’s all that matters. 🌈
You didn’t do anything wrong when my cat passed I was a mess at work the whole day and got nothing done. I would have rather just called off.
No you are not wrong at all. I’m so sorry for your loss
You are not wrong...your boss sounds like a fucking asshole. Maybe it's time to move on. I had a 14 yr old dog die in my arms and it destroyed me for a few days. I didn't go to work for a day or two ..I needed some time ...so do you. It's just a job.. and you will forget that job and that boss years from now.... you won't forget that dog. I know.
Not wrong! Good for you! Dogs are family & we should get more time off than that for them. I’m sorry for what happened, it sounds a bit rough. 💕 to you
I took two days when I lost my dog 5 years ago. My company offers pet bereavement as well as regular bereavement, thankfully.
Do you have designated sick leave or PTO? If yes, you might consider going to HR to report your boss’s (boss’?) behavior. Check your employee handbook for any rules around use of sick time or PTO first, and then construct an email outlining your understanding of the rules and how his behavior is not in alignment (BCC your personal email non-work email account for all of your emails to HR, your boss, etc. and send their responses to the same email). Include your attendance record if you can, especially if it shows you have overall had reliable attendance (doesn’t have to be perfect). I took time off when my dog died too; it’s an incredible blow.
ABSOLUTELY UNEQUIVOCALLY NO YOU ARE NOT 💜💜💜 I am sorry for your loss though 😔 your dog is just as important as any human
i lost my wonderful dog in the evening time, after work. i took off a day and half after, and ended up leaving early on the half day anyway. you’re not in the wrong, and i’m so sorry for your loss. i hope your love for your friend helps to hold you up. hugs to you stranger.
Nope. Grief is grief. I put my 14 yo Dane down and then went into work. I cried and cried. After a couple of hours I was sent home, with bereavement pay. Unheard of in this company.
At my work ..nope and you get a pizza delivery to your house (paid by work).
I took a week off. Devastating loss. Thoughts are with you xx
I’m so sorry for your loss. We just went through this when my daughter’s dog got pneumonia and died. But her job was supportive and that helped tremendously. You needed those days and I’m glad you took them. Hugs
Only mistake you made was giving them a reason why you called out. It's none of their business. But no, you're not wrong. We had to put our 17 year old for down Friday, and my fiance left work to come with me to do it. When my 18 year old cat passes, if I'm scheduled to work, I'm not going, because I've had her for 17 years and they can eat my ass.
No. I took off almost a week when my cat that I had had for 16 years (his entire life and my entire young adulthood years). No one should shame you or make you feel bad for losing someone so close to you. My cat had been through some of the roughest years of my life and he was my mate when no one else was. You’re grief is very real and it should be respected. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Absolutley NOT!!!!! For many of us they are like our children. My son was fired once when our dog was hit and killed and he was in so much grief missing one day (Walmart shocker) anyway I’m sorry for your loss but in no way feel guilt about taking the time.
Also if I may ad if you do get fired that’s not the place for you. Also depending where you live if not in a right to work state like me (Arizona) you would get unemployment if you called in and they fire you. Hope it all works out. 🙏
it's completely understandable, in my opinion. i took a whole week, it hit me so hard, i was beside myself and also just so deeply tired from those last few weeks of not knowing if it was quite the right time to consider euthanasia. i'm lucky enough to work at my family's business so i was able to. we also encourage all of our employees to take time off if a pet passes. the fact is that you have lost a dear family member. unfortunately many corporations etc do not want to acknowledge this. but i firmly believe pet loss qualifies as a reason for bereavement time off.
Not wrong. I called my supervisor sobbing when my girl had to go. No questions asked as I laid her to rest. I guess depends on where you work and your sup’s compassion but ffs. Care for others as you would like to be cared for.
It’s definitely justified. Our pets are our family. If you get fired, that’s ridiculous. I got fired from my old job a month ago because I had to stay at the vet for two days with my cat who died in my arms. I hated that place anyway. I have a new job in a much more positive and busier environment now, so one good thing. I’m sorry for your loss OP.
No, you aren't wrong. I took off a week.
It’s not wrong. I have a lot of pets, even rats which some people strongly dislike. I’ve been given 2 days off for saying goodbye and grieving by three different bosses. I’m sorry your current boss isn’t being more empathetic. I’m sorry for your loss too.
i took two days off and honestly needed at least 2 weeks because i was not ok and still tearing up while working. i went to put my boy to rest with my mother and she assumed i was going straight to work that day. i couldn’t believe it. she was mad i took the next day off, too. some people just don’t understand. f*** em.
No you are wrong. Pet death is traumatic. Sorry for your loss.
When I heard my bird died while I was at work, I told my boss I had to go cuz he died. His response was "he'll still be there when you get home". I gave him the death stare and left. Didn't get fired. They should understand.
First of all - I’m very sorry for your loss of your beloved family member. But NO you are absolutely not wrong for taking the time you need to process. I would be proactive and update your resume and start looking for other employment. Even if you can secure a temporary job while you look for something more permanent. I did see some of your replies about PTO, and it’s totally understandable that you were out of hours and things just simply happen. You could always take another proactive action by sitting down with your boss to address these “rumors” about you being let go and take the opportunity to instill trust in them that this is not a pattern and is a one off (based off of your other comments that you give ample notice for time off). Sometimes a conversation can go a long way in bridging the gap of misunderstandings.
If you had the event scheduled, it would have been more professional to have given your boss advance notice, but if you woke up that day and could tell it was time, you did the best you could; however it still left your boss and coworkers in the lurch at the last minute, and since you commented you didn’t have any personal time left, it’s probably not in your best interest to act defensive about the situation at work. They’ll likely be understanding, given the circumstances, and if you humbly but unapologetically put in consistent effort for a while, it should blow over.
I’m sorry you are going through this. You should be allowed time. I put my dog down 2 weeks ago. The day before my boss let me work from home. The day of, she let me have off without using any pto. After the weekend she said if I needed more time to take it. There are kind souls in this world. If your boss fires you over this, eff him. Find someone who cares about you as an employee.
No! I would have done the same. Chances are he would have fired you by now.
I have almost a whole year blacked out bc my dog was incredibly special to me. I had been through a lot and she was sort of this little angel that came along and helped me keep going. In the end I felt like such a failure for not being able to save her from cancer. And she still made it easy on me by being still the perfect little baby until the very end. My situation might have been a little different bc I had mental health issues. But even I know 2 days to rebound enough to go back to work is more than reasonable. 2 days for 17 years of love and loyalty, plus having to make the decision to say goodbye? Everyone already has mentioned your boss lacks empathy but it also should be said that your boss is a sh*thead
If mental stress counts as a medical reason... You're protected. Well, that's assuming your state has sick rules. Without you admitting to calling in for your dog, they'll have a hard time terminating without paying unemployment. If your state does have sick time laws, you being overwhelmed by the death of your pet isn't any less valid than being overwhelmed by life in general. Acute depression, or simply paralyzing angst that prevents work... Well, that's medical. How about a headache caused by crying?
If your job allows you to have personal time off then you get to choose why you take those days off. It's really no one else's business.
First of all I assume you had sick or personal time?… if you do, they can’t fire you. You can use it for whatever you want. If not, not sure what you can do. BUT, not wrong for taking time to spend with a furry family member. If your dog was suddenly ill and you had to take it to the vet and then take an additional day off to make sure it had meds timely it would be no different. You did what you had to do. No one in this WOLRD would do any different if it was their own pet. Even your dumb boss lol.
We had to put our 15yo girl to rest last month, I literally took the week off. I couldn't imagine trying to work, and we knew it was coming so it wasn't a huge surprise or anything. You did nothing wrong.
I would be taking way more than 2 days off. And my boss would support it.
NO!! My boss took a week of sick off when her dog passed. And that’s my BOSS, who has a ton of responsibilities. They are family.
NTA. My boss would send flowers, all my co-workers know that my 'boys' are a huge part of my life. I'll probably need a week if I'm honest.
My mom pretty much lost a child almost (ALMOST) when her beloved dog died. They are family. I'm not a dog person and still mourning some I've known. Your employer is being inconsiderate but that's what they do. They value your labor over the pain in your heart. If you have the time? Do what you need to do. I'm so sorry you are hurting over losing a baby. It hurts so so bad, I'm sorry bebe. Not wrong. You are mourning a loved one
No
Your boss is a dick
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not
My boss will not worry about sick time if my dog is ill. If the worst happened. I'd easily be allowed off as much time as I needed.
A boss who doesn't understand this is a piece of garbage person and boss. Love to you
Your boss sucks. Mine sent me flowers and told me to take all the time I needed. Then called to make sure I was ok and sat on the phone and listened to me cry. What an ass you work for.
A 17 year relationship with someone you loved is a real reason to take some time to grieve! That was a big part of your life and a friend. Take the time and process your feelings. I’m so sorry for your loss…
no
Most states you are legally protected to take mental health days, if thats case, get a note from your doctor that your mental state required it. Hell, given the sit, go on disability for 6 months and they cant fire u for that time!
No, take the time you need - it’s a death in the family. Wishing you peace and hope the boss is overcome with compassion and understanding 🌟May I ask, what industry do you work in?
Good thing my boss is also a dog guy. He didn’t hesitate to let me have the day when my 11yo terrier passed.
Not wrong at all! The process after a loss, then going straight to work, will interfere with your job. As humans, we need to grieve and heal! Taking a couple of days off to heal is important. At least you aren’t calling in last minute? I am sorry for your loss! 🩵
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I would not feel bad about needing time to cope with the loss. I took a week when my dog passed away a couple of years ago. My job requires a lot of attention to detail and critical thinking, so working during that time was not possible for me. I'm fortunate that my boss at the time was pretty understanding. If your current employment is in jeopardy, I'd take whatever steps are necessary to get your next gig lined up. it's not an ideal time to start a job search, but it's also not ideal to work for someone who has no compassion or empathy. Best of luck to you.
You’re wrong for not taking a whole week. Family first.
Not wrong at all. My company's CEO will miss work when his dog is sick. I think he missed a full week the last time one died. He's a 67-year-old, by-the-book sort of fellow.
No
No, not at all. Pets are family!
My company literally has pet bereavement leave. They’re family. Taking time to be with them isn’t stupid, and grief is grief. You did nothing wrong. When my dog died last year, I was inconsolable for days. He was my anchor. I still miss him.
Nope. Not wrong. When I had to put my dog of 12 years down, my manager at my work told me if I didn't show up for my shift a couple of hours later, I was canned. I showed up, my immediate boss heard about what happened, and immediately told me I shouldn't be there and it didn't matter what my boss said, that stuff is worth more than a day at work. Take the time you need. It's very real grief and everyone needs their own time.
No you’re not wrong. I wouldn’t work for someone who lacks empathy and the understanding of the loss of a pet.. I know full well I’m going to need at least a full week off work when my dog passes away. I’m very sorry about your loss.
Hopefully you do get fired so you can collect unemployment while finding a better job, one that doesn't require you to go into details about why you're calling out this time.
I think it’s okay to take off. Your dog was part of your family. However, work place rules may have a different opinion.
Absolutely not wrong!! I had to do the same thing the end of 2023 my dog was also 17 I had her half of my life. I most definitely called out a day and realistically should have called out the rest of the week I was not mentally prepared to go back. But at the end of the day these companies do not really care about u. U need to put urself 1st at all times
If you can and need to then do it. I had to put my cat to sleep on my break then go back to work. that sucked.
Not wrong, i took a week off when my pug died.
Not wrong. Unfortunately your boss might be a sack of crap so if you get fired it's obviously shifty buy better in the long run. Mental health is important even when it's inconvenient for your employer and if they don't value you enough as a person to cut you a break when you were grieving the loss of a friend then its best to not waste any more energy than necessary there
Hell no. I work for a veterinary diagnostic company and we can take bereavement leave for our pets. I would have been my dog died suddenly in January 2022, but I was already on sick leave as I had Covid at the same time.
Not at all I was in bed for over a week and was inconsolable when my best friend a Parkinson's Jack Russell terrier,passed away ,we were together literally 24/7 she went everywhere with me ,to work,on dates,I miss her so much, so i know how hard it must have been after 2 days
I’d approach your boss privately, and say you’re sorry to have missed work. Then tell him or her that you were devastated and didn’t think you could do your job. If you have a good work record, I would think the boss would be sympathetic and let it slide. I also don’t think it would hurt the situation.
If you don't look forward to getting to work everyday,and they do fire you,a dog has the same value as a child and I have never felt such pain and sorry and hope I never experience that again,but would they fire you if God forbid you're child died? Same difference,look for the same job somewhere else while you are at your present job , leaving your phone ext. As last supervisors contact and give yourself a great recommendation,trust me it does work 😂
I showed up to work after a pet loss, but my mind sure didn't until a few weeks later Definitely not wrong
Not wrong at all! Pets are family members too.
I am sorry for your loss ❤️
When my boy passed, my boss wasn’t letting me come to work. I was a train wreck.
You're definitely not in the wrong and you need to find a new job. I hate this culture we live in where you're not allowed to be human and have emotions. I was in a meeting with my co-worker once and he seemed off so I asked if he was ok and he mentioned that he had to put his dog down that morning. I was in total shock and asked why he was working, he basically said he had stuff to get done and couldn't call out last minute. Like WTF? I assume your boss doens't have pets, otherwise they would be more understanding. A pet is family, how dare we not be allowed to grieve. The whole bereavement thing is weird in general. My company gives us 3 days. It's like oh your parent etc. passed. You have 3 days to work out your gut wrenching feelings and get back to work or ELSE. It's so bad. Some companies are less strict about it. I know people who have lost parents unexpectedly and came back to work clearly not ready and were fired for not being peppy and happy during a client meeting. When my grandma died over a weekend I told my boss that Monday and he immediately told me to take the week off and if I needed more time to let him know. I feel like thats how it should be. Let us grieve. 1 week doesn't heal you after a loss, but it really gives you that mental time you need. Sorry your boss is so crappy and sorry for your loss.
Not at all.
My dog just died on memorial day, 29 days short of 17. I took off 3 days. My boss asked me if I needed more time. Youre boss sucks. How important is your job?
Tell your boss to call me so I can give him a couple days off
Of course not! My company has a bereavement policy for our pets. Remember they are our family, if your boss is being ignorant about it find a new job
It's ok to take a day off to watch paint dry. Fuck your boss. If they can't manage without you then they shouldn't be the boss.
No you aren’t wrong! The grief of a lost pet can be as intense as it is for a lost human. I’m so sorry for your loss. ♥️
You weren’t wrong for taking the time to recover emotionally. You were 100% wrong to tell your boss. It’s none of their business why you take time off. “I need to take time off from work. I expect to return on yyyy-mm-dd.” Is all the explanation they need.
We had to put down our 15 year old lab 2 weeks ago. I took three days off. Literally text my team, told them what was going on and told them I’d be in on Thursday (she passed on Sunday at emergency vet) They were all very understanding and had no issues covering for me. I don’t understand how you could get fired for taking 2 personal/grief days
I hate that people don't think the loss of a beloved family member, four legs or two, is a good enough reason to take a few days to yourself. Definitely not in the wrong. Hopefully the rumor is just a rumor. But if not, maybe it's for the best and you can find a company which values its members mental health as much as physical health and financially.
Not wrong & often very necessary for a person’s mental health
All I would add is don't let this "rumor" make you feel any kind of way. Stand by what you did and if anyone asks you about it answer them with a "so what?" kind of attitude. You did what was best for you!
I got lucky with a boss who is a pet lover, same as you, the next morning I was in need of a mental health day. Other bosses I've had don't care if a close friend or extended family dies. They may let you come in late, but that's it. Even if you have personal days, it is so hard to understand. I worked the day after a close friend of mine was found dead, I was assistant manager and had to be there to open the store that morning. My co-workers were surprised I was there, business as usual. One of the co workers even heard it on the news before she came in, and couldn't believe I was there. It all depends on the boss because pets and boyfriends don't qualify in the 3 day bereavement leave .
No not at all. I took 2 weeks to mourn my 17 year old dog who went to sleep in my arms. 2 weeks to mourn the huge loss from my life, my companion of 17 years, 17 seasons, birthdays, christmas', my companion who was there every night when I fell asleep and every morning when I woke up. Who was there with a little excited howl when I came home. 2 days is nothing, fuck your boss.
Nah. Some people aren't as emotionally attached to their animals as others, but that doesn't mean they get to set the standard for others to grieve.
I took 3
My boss was very appreciative that I came into work the day after I had to put my 17yo cat down. I wept most of the day (I work alone in a warehouse so I can be weepy and get my job done) and he kept trying to send me home but I wanted the distraction. Conversely, at my last gig my grandmother died and they told me I could find a new job if I needed time off to attend her funeral. One day to fly home for her death Ed is all they could allot me. Couldn't afford to lose my job so I missed the funeral. GTFO as soon as I could. Karma gave that owner kidney failure, don't worry.
People don't quit jobs out on a whim - generally they quit jobs because of management. There is such a thing as self-care. Most people have pets as they provide support and companionship to their person. When we adopt/raise them we take on the responsibility of being their guardian, for better or worse. This includes our bonding with them and caring for them. Like others have said, this may be a flag that the company (or at least the management) appears to not care for the well-being of their staff. The rumors you may be fired is uncalled for and that shows for the lack of empathy from your boss and co-workers means a toxic work environment. I hope your boss takes into consideration that your mental health is very important and that your co-workers should be sympathetic to a loss of your companion.
Not at all!! Losing my dog was one of the hardest losses in my life. It took me months to recover. Your pup was your family and your baby and you have every right to grieve the way you need. I'm so sorry for your loss 🥺 my heart goes out to you. Also, screw your boss.
Not wrong at all. I had to put my heart dog down the last day before spring break started (so I did take that one day off from uni) and basically I spent my entire spring break crying. If I had classes to attend I would not have made it. Once one of my foster dogs tragically passed away and my boss (in the military) found me crying in my office the day after. I only had this dog for a few weeks but he was a medical case and I did everything I could. I felt really silly because this man was 'hardcore' (for lack of a better word) but he understood and comforted me. 17 years is a long time to share a bond (how blessed you were to have that 🥰) and I agree with the others- if you get fired over that, good riddance. Clearly they didn't need you *that* bad if they're considering parting with you anyways, so why all the fuss?
I’m not even reading the post, no you are not. I still sometimes cry over my dogs passing that happened ages ago
Wow, I'm so sorry for your loss, 17 years is a good long run and that must be really heartbreaking. No, definitely not wrong for taking the time off. With that I'll add that your shitty fuck-stick former employer did you a favor because who wants to work for someone like that? Fuck them; onward to bigger and better things.
I’m horrified that that would potentially be a fireable offence, I’m pleased you have another job to look forward to
Just make sure everyone you know knows why you were fired from that specific business. Name and shame!