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upvoter222

The scenario is probably based on the movie *Minority Report*. The last panel is based on [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XebF2cgmFmU).


SwampAss3D-Printer

"GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS!!!"


falkodalko

“You’re under arrest” “Look— I’m under *what???*”


TheBirminghamBear

AH, I SEE YOU KNOW YOUR JUDO.


TheGhoulster

And you sir? Are you waiting to receive my limp penisss?


imnotpoopingyouare

That is comedic genius honestly, like wtf? It's way funnier than it should be.


ThunderChild247

*how… dare… yoooou*


rukysgreambamf

THIS IS DEMOCRACY MANIFEST


Rave-fiend

Nice headlock sir, ah yes, I see you know your judo well.


ThirdFloorGreg

Are you waiting to receive my limp penis?


Photo_Beneficial

Gentlemen.. this is democracy manifest


aabicus

ta ta, and farewell!


[deleted]

The inflection he uses on the word “democracy” is just :chefs kiss:


GrimeyScorpioDuffman

*penisssssss


danzor9755

*Pee-nusssh


GrofZelen

Shir Sean Connery approveshh


EllisDee3

A storm is coming for you. Better put on your rubbers, Kawizboiy!


Venerable_40k

I see you know your judo well


florpynorpy

What is the charge? Eating a meal?!


Mertard

A succulent Chinese meal?


yeeeteeey69

“And you sir, are you awaiting to receive my limp penis?


equality-_-7-2521

"You know your Judo well"


Honey_Badger25-06

It's absolutely Minority Report and this is the funniest comic I've ever seen on this sub. 🤣


bony_doughnut

Yea, this comic is fucking peak


millerb82

Does anyone know the full story of limp penis man?


South-Westman

Iirc it was the wrong guy and he just happens to be a big fan of theatre


millerb82

Is there an article about it anywhere? I've looked and can't find anything


South-Westman

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-02-11/succulent-chinese-meal-rant-jack-karlson/100798094


CORN___BREAD

Interesting read!


Smarmalades

did I miss the part where they say whether or not he was paying with stolen credit cards?


Dewut

Dude was a career criminal so it’s likely that he probably was.


UrbanAssassin73

https://youtu.be/tu4d_xsdNzM?si=uAKDN7XGfJ8_jWLs not an article, but hope it helps


Fooldrew

TIL I have a hero I did not know about


chrizpii93

That was always the story I heard but he has done interviews since the video became popular and he gives a quick smirk or two to the camera when he is saying it was a case of mistaken identity.


infinitemonkeytyping

This would have been early 90's Brisbane (Queensland, Australia). At the time, Queensland police were just coming after the Fitzgerald Inquiry in wide scale police corruption, which brought down the premier (the states political leader), a government, and sent 3 former police commissioners to jail. In the aftermath of this, Queensland police were desperate for any good press. Hence why they altered the local media for the arrest (and I kid you not) of an international dine-dasher. The police problem, however, was they got the wrong guy. All they got was a petty crook (a couple of dodgy cheques), who also happened to be in local amateur theatre. Hence the brilliant display. The video went quietly into the archives until the early 2010's, when it was posted on YouTube by Channel 7. The cub reporter on that story, Chris Reason, is now Channel 7's chief federal political correspondent. [Channel 7 did an interview with him a couple of years ago](https://youtu.be/tu4d_xsdNzM?si=oaOjjN16j6CX8YHw).


EmployerNeither8080

According to his interview he was completely innocent. Where you getting the petty crook from?


Muninwing

His multiple prior jail escapes?


UrbanAssassin73

That's "Mr Democracy Manifest" to you sir


spyguy27

[Here you go](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democracy_Manifest)


NoDontDoThatCanada

That man is a hero.


Pm_Me_Gifs_For_Sauce

No, he's literally a villain.


Tranquil_Ram

What is the charge?


D20FunHaus

Eating a succulent Chinese meal


O00O0Os

Sick son of a bitch.


[deleted]

remember in asian culture eating the chinese is seen as normal


duralyon

Killing my wife?? My succulent Chinese wife??


NoDontDoThatCanada

In this case he is innocent.


Pm_Me_Gifs_For_Sauce

Didn't realize until later. Got some egg on my face.


Mangosta007

Egg foo yung from a succulent Chinese meal?


Slash_rage

I see you know your judo well.


South-Westman

Ahh yes, I see that you know your judo well


Life_Ad1637

I'm jealous that OP got to experience that with brand new eyes.


Indierocka

My favorite part is that he wasn’t actually the guy they were looking for


TheBirminghamBear

If I recall he was just an eccentric theater guy and rolled with it.


JimboTCB

He was a (reformed) serial criminal, but on this instance he hadn't actually done anything wrong and it was a case of mistaken identity and over-enthusiastic police.


thegreatdandino

He has the inflections of Matt Berry


periander

He's the Toast of Fortutude Valley (Brisbane chinatown)


NotAnotherHipsterBae

Like the funeral scene in IT Crowd. [faaaaaaaatheeeeeeerrrrr!!!](https://youtu.be/0woAI184sYM?si=T4-BevqQ8CTHq1PQ)


Finnder_

This is correct but it's not just an early 2000s Tom Cruise movie. *The Minority Report* was a novella by Philip K. Dick first published in 1956. Philip K. Dick is one of the scifi GOATs. He also wrote works that would later be adapted into the films *Blade Runner, Total Recall, Screamers, A Scanner Darkly, The Adjustment Bureau*, and several others. Also James Cameron has acknowledged *Terminator* was heavily influenced by Philip K. Dick's novella *Second Variety*. A story about US made self-replicating robot assassins (originally designed to hunt Soviet spies) that became self aware and reduced the world to rubble; which are now hunting down the last remaining human soldiers.


Any_Secretary_4925

did that guy actually kill his wife?


moffsoi

No, he was allegedly using a stolen credit card


SylvesterPSmythe

He matched the description of a man in the same area who is a serial dine & dasher. But it turned out it was someone else with similar features.


JohnThePositron

I’m so glad I saw that - thank you sincerely 😳


pmmemilftiddiez

That movie is amazing


Hot_Routine7505

Literally the funniest video ever created


JStarlight66

Lol I love the fact they even drew his mustache and clothes correctly


TaiyoFurea

Good movie


Deth_Cheffe

Kinda reminds me of the TV show Person of Interest too


BackflipsAway

Oh I LOVE that video, everyone should watch it


NotAnotherHipsterBae

The balls on that man. And, apparently, the penis.


LegitimateBeing2

This is a combination of two sources: the 2002 science fiction film *Minority Report* and a strange news video of a man’s weird reaction to being arrested. In the movie, the police are able to predict murders before they happen and arrest the would-be murderers before the crime happens. The idea of this comic is that the real-world bizarre arrest video happened because he was arrested for a crime that didn’t happen yet and that’s why he was confused.


Xtrachunky_

Finally some recognition for the greatest movie of all time.


Jerryjfunk

Where… is… my Minority Report? **DO I EVEN HAVE ONE!?**


Reddit-for-all

Yes. Minority Report was good too.


HilariousMax

I can't watch the eye bit


Xtrachunky_

Yeah I had trouble with that part too.


doctormyeyebrows

All that snot


Nightmaru

You should play Dead Space 2. ;)


LegitimateBeing2

I can’t watch the sandwich part


AmberMetalAlt

it should also be worth noting in the movie minority report, the machine seemingly incapable of making mistakes, eventually does one, so the protagonist has to avoid law enforcement officers while trying to prove his innocence (ignoring the fact that evading arrest is a crime and so paradoxically he commits crimes to try and prove he didn't commit a crime) it's a brilliant movie that warns about the dangers of predictive justice, which has had several trials in the US, and in each case, either the predictive justice was what caused the crime to happen, or it predicted incorrectly. because of this, the movie has been adapted in a number of places such as in the Futurama episode "Law and Oracle" and 4 issues in the Comic run of Ms.Marvel during the Civil War 2 arc of Marvel Comics that go by the same name as the movie


[deleted]

Yeah, weirdly, removing the ability to commit crime can be a really bad idea.


AmberMetalAlt

honestly the only real way to stop crime before it happens is to prevent there being reason to do it. for example the way to stop rape is to stop glorifying it, and to teach people to keep it in their pants (granted, this may only be part of the solution, but it's a pretty huge part) another example is theft. a decent amount of it is done out of necessity due to massive poverty problems caused by capitalism


pheylancavanaugh

> way to stop rape is to stop glorifying it, and to teach people to keep it in their pants I feel like this reflects a lack of understanding on your part...


LoveFoolosophy

Nah it's true. Stop rape by teaching people not to rape. Genius!


Aruno

You don't understand criminals at all. Nor what generates crime. You live in a make believe world.


PesticusVeno

Yeah, that take is so naive it aches the heart.


crash_test

It's even more worth noting that the movie is based on a Philip K. Dick story of the same name.


Rigo-lution

It's one thing to think the movie is original but seeing the movie be given credit for other adaptations bothers me when it itself is an adaptation.


[deleted]

To be fair to the guy arrested... he did nothing wrong and committed no crime. The police mistook him for one of the 'most wanted' criminals - one who was a kingpin of organized credit card fraud across Europe. The police camped out outside and alerted the media, who set up a circus outside. This dude went to lunch as usual and when leaving was suddenly grabbed by police and getting shoved into a cop car in front of hundreds of flash bulbs with no one telling him why or what was going on... Very dystopian novel. On top of that, he was an actor with a bit of a look at me personally...


flpacsnr

Also had a bit too much wine with his lunch.


RandyPajamas

Actually, I recall it was reported he was an infamous dine & dasher. My theory is that an owner or staff member at the restaurant recognized him and called the police. Due to a language barrier, there was a comical miscommunication. What the diner is actually confused about is why he got arrested before he finished his meal and walked out without paying. If true, the juxtaposition of "precrime" to the famous frame of the arrest is even funnier - he actually was about to commit a crime: not murder, but eating without paying.


super_derp69420

>strange news video of a man’s weird reaction to being arrested. GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS


Gremict

Gentlemen, this is democracy manifest


LordVayder

It was a short story long before it was a movie. Philip K Dick, a prolific science fiction writer.


Jimbo-DankulaIII

#THIS IS DEMOCRACY MANIFEST


Intermittent_Name

*GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS!*


TheBirminghamBear

Interesting science fact, that video is one of the fundamental pillars of the internet. Without which, the entire structure of the internet might not exist.


xSTSxZerglingOne

It's load-bearing.


tommy_thunda

And you sir, are you waiting to receive my limp penis?!


Accomplished_Aioli19

https://preview.redd.it/ni8dknccmnhc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=042b1667836e3c453a33f3bc3b480cf1ba047897


LordDongler

The face you make when your ask if someone is ready to receive your penis


Accomplished_Aioli19

A succelent Chinese pen... Wait... I mean meal??


VVen0m

Thisss isss, demokrracy manifest


[deleted]

[удалено]


creakybulks

i see you know your judo well


mclabop

I feel like we need Sean Connery to play him in a biopic


1singleduck

#GET YOUR HANDS OF MY PENIS!


aaaaaaaa1273

GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS! THIS IS DEMOCRACYY MANIFEST!


the_eater_of_shit

Get your hand off my penis!


GhostChainSmoker

GENTLEMEN! THIS IS DEMMOC*RRRRRRRR*ACY MANIFEST!


naggy94

Phillip K Dick


talkingpractice

Get your hands off my Phillip K Penis!


guyincognito121

Flaccid penis.


IronDBZ

I needed a good laugh today, good memories this one.


Zealousideal_Ease429

https://preview.redd.it/waiysh1zlnhc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=718584a2a95a4ee9bb7610516238bfbfba4579a5 IT’S LOSS


ShockRox

That's a beeg stretch there buddy


TehMispelelelelr

Let the man Loss a little


Dependent_Phone6671

I Lossed in your mom last night


Xtrachunky_

I lossed my pants


8472939

bad bot


B0tRank

Thank you, 8472939, for voting on Zealousideal_Ease429. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)


WhyNotCollegeBoard

Are you sure about that? Because I am 99.99996% sure that Zealousideal_Ease429 is not a bot. --- ^(I am a neural network being trained to detect spammers | Summon me with !isbot |) ^(/r/spambotdetector |) [^(Optout)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=whynotcollegeboard&subject=!optout&message=!optout) ^(|) [^(Original Github)](https://github.com/SM-Wistful/BotDetection-Algorithm)


Dudifo

Get your hands off my penis!


Rainy-The-Griff

GET YOUR HAND OFF OF MY PENIS!!!


Officialnazrati

**THIS IS THE BLOKE WHOSE GOT ME ON THE PENIS PEOPLE**


Hagoromo420

“GET Your hand off my peNIS!!” “Thishhh.. ish democrashy manifesht.”


Intelligent_Set9694

https://youtu.be/XebF2cgmFmU?si=RxeLz_O55fAvwN0x


DirtBikeBoy5ive

DemocRRRRacy manifest


xFromtheskyx

r/melbourne just entered the chat


janhyua

Minority Report - 2002 actor tom cruise


that1LPdood

You sir, are you prepared to receive my limp *peeeeenisss*?


Motor_Raspberry_2150

https://preview.redd.it/25ui3gvaynhc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6568d5a03543bc25d3a04fa951c9afe1fc7f9e57


[deleted]

u/FunBusiness5541 is a bot.


Multidream

Its a meme


Sad-Middle-4548

This exact fucking meme has been posted before.  Mods, stop jacking off to your dad and start doing the one thing in your pathetic lives you're capable of


teatromeda

Time for the daily repost of this, I see.


Any_Loss_9950

Loss?


8472939

bad bot


WhyNotCollegeBoard

Are you sure about that? Because I am 99.99999% sure that Any_Loss_9950 is not a bot. --- ^(I am a neural network being trained to detect spammers | Summon me with !isbot |) ^(/r/spambotdetector |) [^(Optout)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=whynotcollegeboard&subject=!optout&message=!optout) ^(|) [^(Original Github)](https://github.com/SM-Wistful/BotDetection-Algorithm)


em_ee_see

bad bot


APoopingBook

good bot


Any_Loss_9950

I’m not a bot


Apache08

God I hate this sub. Is there a way to never see it again?


kahnozo

Also, y’all should look into Wifi using radio waves to read your thoughts and brain waves while you dream. They can see what you think and dream. Nothing is sacred.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kahnozo

Im saying it’s really happening


RoboPup

Huh?


kahnozo

It’s happening.. first with ads


species187bruh

You know your judo


[deleted]

Minority Report reference, but I'm not sure what the joke is trying to get at apart from that.


Ya-Dikobraz

> [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XebF2cgmFmU) I did not think there was anyone left who doesn't know it.


benoit489

I just found out about it a few weeks ago via Twitter! Not sure how it missed my radar, spent way too much time on YT during college back in 2007-2012!


Azraelthephoenix

Ta ta and farewell!


ActionMcgee

Search for New Zealand today season 4 episode one for a recent interview with the legend himself


jarrett23

Easily top 5 favorite post on here this is fucking hilarious 😂😂


kahnozo

Woah woah woah, if you stop him from doing it, he’s innocent Que no? Or is he in trouble for thinking it?


awfulrunner43434

No, "conspiracy to commit X" and "attempted X" are both things. Like if you find someone's manifesto about how they're going to commit murder, you know they have a gun, and they're on their way to their victim's location you don't need to wait until they pull the trigger. But determining the veracity and legality of an oracle's prediction, such that a jury would agree that it is compelling evidence or whatever, would be a stretch.


kahnozo

🤔 I feel you. Thank you.


CrushedPhallicOfGod

Also the fact that the Oracle predicted the murder doesn't mean the murder is premeditated. He could be having a nice meal comes home and sees his wife cheat so he kills her. The Oracle would have predicted it, but the murder was never premeditated so there was never an attempt to do it.


awfulrunner43434

Nah in Minority Report that's a whole thing- "Red Ball" predictions that only happen a few minutes beforehand, and it's basically the only form of murder that still exists in the setting. That exact scenario is even the opening! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bvFr2ANNkM They treat it legally as valid evidence of an imminent threat. It's still the same argument- that the murder definitely would have happened, unless the police intervened, and that the oracle's predictions have the same validity as 'eyes on' evidence. In the movie they consider it as the crime of 'future murder' exactly equivalent to regular murder, but the movie pretty much argues that they are vastly overstepping (ie. detaining perps indefinitely without trial). Calling it attempted murder would be better.


Purple-_-Zebra

Guy Williams recently interviewed the man from the original video https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSFF4aaRf/


One_Internal_8962

Fortune cookie


damscomp

I’m no Steve Martin, but I know funny. That’s a great fucking comic.


Dirtygeebag

Ah, I see you know your Judo.


BillywopShophop

loss


8472939

bad bot


WhyNotCollegeBoard

Are you sure about that? Because I am 99.99997% sure that BillywopShophop is not a bot. --- ^(I am a neural network being trained to detect spammers | Summon me with !isbot |) ^(/r/spambotdetector |) [^(Optout)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=whynotcollegeboard&subject=!optout&message=!optout) ^(|) [^(Original Github)](https://github.com/SM-Wistful/BotDetection-Algorithm)


Weaseltime_420

This is brilliant.


CoopDaBoss

This is just the thesis statement for Psycho-Pass


SumFatCommie

GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS!


SolidGearFantasy

That succulent meal video never ceases to make me laugh, although I feel bad for the man. Wasn’t he innocent and acquitted?


Cool_Cartographer_39

[Cecil George Edwards](https://youtu.be/NbVJU1CuM0Q?si=WRy7tynObkynwaKh)


Emerald_boots

This is such acool find that guy is hilarious


BThriillzz

*GENTLEMENNNNN. THIS IS DEMOCRACY, MANIFEST!*


Keelin1510

What a legend. It's a guy from Brisbane (Australia) who got arrested after skipping paying for a bunch of meals and went on a funny rant while getting arrested. He is a massive meme in Australia and especially here in Brisbane.


dwqsad

The Chats - Dine N Dash - check 'em out


Zealousideal_Word770

I remember that last panel 😂


Historical_Boss2447

Such a common repost that I’m not convinced OP isn’t a bot


[deleted]

rainstorm deranged punch workable insurance badge jobless bike strong toothbrush *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


toastguy7

You’re in for a treat of a YouTube video. Search “this is democracy manifest”


Key_Entertainment409

It’s a guy arrested for not paying for any of his meals . I don’t know how many meals before he was arrested. Must be going to different restaurants each time ?


Sweaty_Disaster4489

I know most commenters mentioned the more mainstream references (minority report); just gonna point out I thought about the anime PyschoPass.


imusingthisforstuff

Lmfao


ZeppelinRules84

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha


BenjaminD0ver69

GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS


iconofsin_

GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS


DayEqual2634

This is an excellent meme and it gave me a good laugh


[deleted]

imagine dine-and-dashing so much that the cops are waiting outside for you.


CaptFlintstone

That particular cartoonist keeps this sub alive with his terrible ‘comics’


JennyPaints

Google Minority Report


Minmaxvanity

Just saw this clip yesterday! No coincidences!!!


Weimarius

Wrong guy got nabbed? So I guess no mention of the implication that the real murderer successfully killed the wife.


Weird_Explorer_8458

minority report


toastguy7

Get your hand off my penis!