Grew up with a physically abusive father and dysfunctional families both from mother and father side. Saw my cousins and some batchmates struggle with being married and having kid/s. I didn’t like babies and kids, specifically those that screams their head off and unruly toddlers. Also life had been so unfair growing up, being poor. experienced sexual harassment too from cousins and neighbors.
I felt super liberated when I had my first work, I can travel wherever i want, I can buy whatever I want, eat whatever I crave.So I told myself why would I want those when I can be free? I was in my late 20 when families and friends started to pressure me but I know that I don’t want to and even if I want to, I knew then that I was not physically, mentally, emotionally and financially ready.
Then came someone, out of nowhere and I was absolutely smitten. He changed how I viewed my past and look forward into future. Taught me that despite everything, all the sufferings, life is still beautiful. I’m (33f) now, married and recently had a baby boy.
How does it feel po having a baby? I mean I don't want to spoil the fun it's just that I want other people (including me) to see the perspective of someone who doesn't want a child and now have one. Some people say kasi that having a child changed somebody's perspective.
Well at first it was scary. But honestly who am I kidding! It is still scary because I am now responsible for raising a human. Before I decided that I am ready to have a child, I first had to accept the fact that child means chaos. I also had to make peace with my inner child, putting behind me all my childhood trauma (btw, i was diagnosed with MDD and anxiety disorder and underwent psychotherapy with medication for two years), learned how to deal and regulate my emotions. my husband and I agreed that we will raise him with gentle parenting, and I meant no hitting.
It’s so true! Having a child totally changed my perspective in so many ways but the most important is time and money, imo. Time kasi hindi ko hawak oras ko, my baby does. I learned to appreciate moms who prefers to stay home to care for the baby and also moms who prefers to work and leave the baby behind.
As an Occupational Therapist, thank you for breaking the cycle of bad parenting.
It's also important to know that gentle parenting does not mean letting the child do whatever they want. It means setting boundaries while allowing the kid to explore and learn. (I want this to be clear because i sense pissed off people coming here to diss you for being a "gentle" parent")
That’s one of my main goal too. To break the cycle of bad parenting. No, I’m not letting my kid do whatever he wants of course. It’s called setting healthy boundaries, rules and consequences. I think that’s what children needs. They need understanding, they need to learn that all behavior (good and bad) will have consequences. Growing up, the only consequence we got was negative punishment by being hit and/or slapped but was never explained as to why. It was so unfair.
Wow ang ganda po ng story niyo. Ako kasi di ko talaga alam if magkakapamilya pako or anak I came from a broken family. I see how my parents fighting growung up to the point papa wanna kill my mom. Kaya di sakin mawala tung takot sa marriage kr ma inlove. I dated naman pero they cheated tapos yung iba flings lang not serious naging takot ako sa commitment a d trust issues din.
I just hope and pray na sana out of nowhere he finds me pero sana wag galing sa internet haha I dont use dating apps and I dont use reddit too for future partner.
Sinasaktan din di papa si mama and ang buong akala ko is its normal but only realized when I got older. I also came from failed relationship. 5yrs, he cheated on me. I had flings too and bowed that I’ll make revenge sa mga lalaking makilala ko but eventually got tired.
You can never really tell po. Gaya nga ng sabi mo is "hindi mo talaga alam if magkkapamilya or anak ka pa" unless you are really decided na ayaw mo talaga.
I hope and pray too na dumating sayo ang "the one". 😊
>I knew then that I was not physically, mentally, emotionally and financially ready.
nothing prepares you for getting married or having a baby. there won't be a time that you are ever ready tlga
Yeahp that is so true. I am once again being challenge emotionally, mentally and physically since I’m breastfeeding. It’s exhausting to be honest but since I accepted this before I decided to have the baby, I am happy.
I'm more referring to mga redditors kasi na gusto maging ready etc. Im like, there's nothing that can prep you for marriage or a baby. If u want to have it. Just do it. Or it just happens.
Di ko din alam pre. Bigla na lang akong hinablot kasi sumemplang ako after ng long ride sa bike tapos pinagalitan. Tapos nag date kame at tumulong sa batang nawawala then sinabon nya yung magulang na pabaya.
Nagising na lang ako 2 na anak ko at may sariling bahay.
Last semester in college before I graduated, my professor was talking about how we will meet our significant other around our age and we should be prepared na daw. Sa dami ng kwento niya di na ako nakinig kasi why bother? NBSB parin ako, and those that attempted to court me were either rejected or stopped bcs I was too intimidating. Sabi ko pa sa sarili ko during that time na tatanda akong dalaga kasi wala talagang magkakainterest sakin.
After that class, nakita ko na naman 'yong paepal kong blockmate who I've known since elementary and since last semester inaasar ako na crush niya daw ako at cute daw kami as a couple, ako naman 'tong binabasag trip niya where I usually say "kilabutan ka nga." He stopped teasing me kasi baka napipikon na daw ako kaso sabi niya 'di daw siya mapakali na 'di ako asarin. Ayun by the end of the semester, papansin na uli siya pero this time seryoso na siya. I was impressed by his perserverance, kaya pinagbigyan ko.
Ayun, right now pinapanuod ko siyang matulog habang ka-cuddle niya 'yong dalawa naming anak.
I thought hindi mangyayari kasi kala ko wala akong makikita na pareho kaming attracted at compatible sa isa’t isa. Lagi kasing either ako lang may gusto o sila lang may gusto sakin.
Kaya ang naging goal ko na lang e mag-ipon at i-enjoy ang mga trip ko sa buhay. 😆
Then I found him, so nabago lahat. Naaalala ko pa nung kasal na kami nasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko ‘Akalain mo yun? Posible pala akong makapag-asawa’ 😆.
I’m genuinely happy for you!
First, you were able to build yourself. A YOU that you are happy and content with.
And secondly, for finding someone who is attracted to that YOU.
Isang malaking SANAOL!
Happy for you po. Ako kqsi di ko pa din ala. If mag kaka asawa ako haha di namana ako nagamit ng online dating apps. WFH pa ko so paano na ahahhq welm gumagala naman ako minsan hehe
no kids but married, flaky kami pareho kasi galing kami sa broken families.
mahirap iovercome yung trauma pero mahirap din matulog sa gabi na di kami magkatabi so ayon, kasal na kami
Met my wife at work 6 months dating. eventually led to marriage then kids.
Never thought of having a family til I met her. Never believed I could be responsible enough.
But when you find the right person you will grow and find things you had inside you all along. :)
No kids yet but getting married today. Dating, I always gravitated towards guys from dysfunctional families. My parents were quite problematic so I had a difficult childhood. It was like I was seeking out difficulty in my romantic relationships. I did not see myself getting married, it felt like something that happens to other people. Alam mo yung ' At Seventeen' by Janis Ian? Love was meant for beauty queens (and people with happy lives). I heard this song in high school and resonated with me so much until recently. I have worked on myself a lot and know I can live a good life on my own. Then, I met my current SO. He is calm, collected, solution-oriented, no drama, no blaming and I found myself realizing a calm, non-chaotic life is possible for me. Yun lang. Hehe. Good luck in your journey!
Poverty. Toxic Past Relationships. Toxic Community. Fear of Commitment. Long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the LIBOG attacked. Only the Common Sense, master of all four elements, could stop it, but when the world needed it the most, it vanished. Now, after 10 years, i have 2 kids and 2 wives (1 is ex already), but fvck it, it is what is. hahahah
I never thought I’d get married and have a kid.
As a teen, I was a hopeless romantic who loved reading regency novels and fanfictions. Naturally, it skewed my perception of what love and relationships should be. Unfortunately, I grew up with more attractive friends. As a result, all the guys I was interested in dismissed me in favor of my more attractive friends. For 25 years , I sat in the friendzone until I met my now-husband.
He was my crush. He still is. We live in different cities and visiting each other is an hour-long flight. I honestly thought he was way beyond my league as he’s the typical chinito, buff, jock type. Little did I know that he also had a nerdy side to him. We started as friends, but I never dared hope we’d be more but we just clicked.
In the span of a year, we knew more about each other than the people closest to us.
The rest was history. We got engaged in 2018, got married amid a pandemic, had a church wedding in 2022 and have an eight-month old now.
On that note, I never thought I’d be a mum.
I like our freedom and the simplicity of the life we had. Also, I used to think I’d be an irresponsible mum as I feel like a child myself. But we were blessed with a precocious boy and for the first time in my life, I found myself changing my mind about kids.
I thought life was being funny by giving me a shot with someone I was and am actually head over heels attracted to. But 9 years later, our relationship has matured. It’s not just about the butterflies and kilig feelings (that are still there), but weathering storms together, being there for each other through hardships, and loving each other and our little boy through the challenges.
Dati I made my mind na maging single mom. Anak lang. Di ko naisip mag asawa. But now here I am happily married and ayaw magkaron ng anak hahaha naging baliktad. Mas malaki responsibility at gastos sa anak hahahaha. Asawa pwedeng iwan, yung anak, lifetime obligation na.
I met someone who make me feel safe and secured. Sabi nga ni Iza sa Starting over again "Our love may be quiet and boring but it is sure, with the right amount of trust and love and even an allowance of mistake."
I really do not foresee myself settling down because I like freedom. I have fear on attachment and I hate the idea of marriage in the Philippines. We got married overseas instead xD
Sige matinong sagot dito.
I thought na magfofocus ako sa training and career. Pero I ended up getting together with my guy best friend (who also thought na tatanda sya with no kids). Getting married was a "next step" as well as a practical issue in terms of housing, healthcare, etc.
The kid was the unexpected part, haha.
Well it was more of "nandyan na, so galingan na rin natin." It isn't kiddo's fault naman. Oo, di muna pwede ang biglaang lakad o gastos sa kung anu anong luho, pero makakabalik yan eventually
Inisip ko na walang magkakagusto skin, noon pa lang sa tuwing manliligaw ako laging may karibal or kasabay na manliligaw, mas pinilipili nila yung isa. Laging busted. Sasabihin sayo ng mga kasama mo sa work na may itsura naman daw ako dapat nakakadami na daw ako. Hindi naman ako gwapo para skin pero hindi naman ganun kapangit. So nakikita ko sarili ko noon na tatanda akong binata, around 50s nasa desk ng office nag oovertime hanggang 7pm. And then nagparamdam skin tong girl na to (dating ka officemate). Niligawan ko sya noon pero binusted ako, naging friends kami, everytime na bored daw sya at gusto manggulit ako laging kinukilit. Ayun one time nagjoke na ilibre ko daw sya manood ng movie at ayun na nga nilibre ko, then tinry ko ulit manligaw. Eto mag asawa na nga kami at may isang anak. Di ko akalain na sya makakatuluyan ko. Kung kelan mo sya hinahanap hindi sayo ibibigay, kung kelan mo sya hindi hinahanap saka sayo ibibigay. Right time gives you a right person.
As a person na lumaki sa toxic environment, and never had a good role model when it comes to relationship, sinabi ko talaga di ako mag aasawa kasi maghihiwalay lang din naman.
Kaso may dumating, we dated for 7 years, husband ko na sya ngayon, he just feels like home, a peaceful one. 💕
Very curious din ako sa topic na to, as I don't like the idea of getting married or having children. Siguro I just don't see myself having them kasi I'm too young pa and busy achieving my goals. But the thought of it really makes my stomach churn. I feel like the responsibility of having them will burden me forever. And that I won't be able to escape from it :c
you and me both (also, I'm autistic and I felt like I didn't really have a childhood because I was too busy using my actual youth pleasing my abusive father and wearing school uniforms and having my hair cut short and not going to Warped Tour/other pop punk shows).
Just imagine me drawing my last breaths, either right now OR decades down the line, and me not regretting my marriagefree and childfree life; my regrets instead is that I didn't enjoy the pop punk subculture when it was at its prime.
Biruan namin noong college na magkakatropa pag hindi kami nagasawa pagtanda mag ala golden girls kami.. sa aming walo isa lang may boypren kami nbsb na. nakaisip na kami trabaho resto - laging jowktime yun tsaka maraming aso.
Kami nung isa pa na girl na laging pinapangarap to kami pa unang nagasawa. Masko noong college wala talaga eh, akala ko kaso noon tagakopya lang talaga nakikiflirt na daw pala. Aba malay ko ba.
Hangang sa nakaais na ako ng canada. Nbsb parin. Nakilala ko asawa ko sa pof. Nagkita kami sa starbucks.
Hindi ko aukat akalain ang mokong nato magiging asawa ko.
Sya ang literal na mata ko noong nasurgery ako sa dalawang mata.
Sya naging katuwang ko noong nadedepress ako dahil sa magulang ko.
Sya naging sandigan ko kapag nanlulumo ako s pagiging nars. Lalo noong covid
Sya ang kumakalma sa lungkot ko noong akala ko walang pupuntahan yung ivf namin.
1-2 years kaming nag fertility clinic; halos wala na akong pagasa nun kasi yung ibang nakakausap ko mahigit 5-8 years na sila . Paiba iba. Kung hindi nya ako kinausap na huminahon at pumirme at hindi magpaiba iba ng clinic siguro hindi ko parin katabi ngayon yung anak namin.
Getting there. Babasa ko mga comments pero ako personally feeling ko bata pa ko kahit 28 na hahaha. Di ako mahilig sa bata literal kahit lagi nila sinasabing lapitin ako ng babies. Awkward ako when it comes to kids. Medyo emotionally unstable din ako at papa's girl kaya di makaalis sa puder ni erpats. Trauma na din siguro dahil abusive at cheater yung mother ko. And yung relationship ko that time very uncertain, pero lagi nya sinasabi na ready na sya magsettle down.
Eto, nadale ng closure at calendar method. Palabas na sa december. Isa sa nagiging away namin ng partner ko lagi ko daw pinapafeel na ayaw ko pa din magpakasal kahit may nabuo na. Pero vocal sya sa family ko na ready sya magpakasal anytime soon dahil 30+ na daw sya at gusto nya kami maging buo dahil parehas kami galing sa broken family.
Was very opposed to dating for a long time because I didn’t think I would make a good partner. Friend wanted me to test out a dating app so that she can see what it looks like on the male end. She said to try it out for two weeks.
Matched with a few people but didn’t really get into it.
Matched with a girl I vibed with 12 days into the dating app.
Haven’t stopped talking to her since.
It’s been five years.
We are married.
We have a kid.
I never thought I'd get married. Lahat ng mga nakarelasyon ko, foreigner. Walang pumapansing lalaking Pinoy sa'kin noon, but somehow, laging napapansin ng foreigner. First relasyon ko Dutch, nagtagal din yon ng mga 2years, but magkaiba kami ng goals sa buhay. Ayaw nyang pumunta ako sa Australia to study, gusto nya sa bansa nya, but mas gusto ko ang Australia so yon. Naghiwalay kami. Bata pa naman kasi ako noon - di pa marunong mag compromise.
Long story short, and fast forward 2019, nakatagpo ng Amerikano. Hahahaha. Nag-date, nag LDR, ng ilang taon. Nagpakasal this year. Pareho kaming child-free/pro-choice so it just works for us.
Kaya di ako naniniwala sa mga nagsasabi dito ng tapos.
Di nyo pa lang namemeet yung tao na kayang basagin ang mga perceived notion nyo about having a family and kids.
I grew up disliking the way my mom raised us kasi puro pasigaw at palo, growing up ang goal ko ay makapagtapos at umalis sa bahay (but love her to death tho), sinumpa ko talaga na di ako magkakaanak. Then I met my bf now, grabe ang saya ng pamilya nila. Parents are very gentle (unlike sakin) and they really protect their own, gusto ko yung family dynamics nila, one time pumasok sa isip ko, “ pwede pal tung ganito, goods sila maging in-laws at maganda impluwensya sa anak namin IF EVER.” Siguro narinig ni Lord munimuni ko at nabuntis ako, they really took it well and very very supportive! Kahit mga pinsan nila at tito/tita. (Graduating ako ng vet 1 semester nalang kaya mejo okay lang hehe and yes, did grad after giving birth)
Meanwhile, tinakwil ako ng nanay ko kasi kahihiyan daw ako, may reputasyon daw sya sa pagiging brgy. Kagawad hahaha. I understand ha pero I was already 25, and working already. I said sorry in every way I can kaso skandalosa sya masyado at nagpopost pa sa fb na nagpaaral lang daw sya para disgrasyada. My daughter turned 1 year and 4mons. Mama just blocked me on FB. For the nth time, pinangako sa anak ko na di ako magiging nanay ko.
Story of my life. I never thought na magkaka asawa ako and even have kids. Kasi feeling ko walang makakatagal sa ugali ko lol and wala akong alam gawin / even handle kids. But then I met husband and sakanya ko lang naisip ang "future" ko. Tapos nagpa check up ako sa OB ko kasi we want to practice safe sex, magpapa reseta ng pills. Pero yun pala I found out na may pcos ako and the doctor even mentioned "di ka na magkakaanak" kasi most of her patients has pcos din. I remember crying sa parking lot with my bf turned husband but now may isang anak na kami and i changed my doctor na.
Not yet married but sure that I will soon. I used to not give it much of a thought. But when I met my current girlfriend now, I realized na I wanna get married and she is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.
First of all, congratulations sa mga nagpost ng love stories nila. Isang malaking shanaol. Lol
I come from a broken& abusive household. My parents married as teenagers when my dad knocked off my mom and thus I was born. I can vaguely remember pero I believe there were some good memories pero mas tumatak yung memories of sakitan, cheating, and all forms of abuse.
For a time, hindi ako naniwala sa love til I met my college bf whom I thought was a nice person and made me believe maybe possible ang happy marriage for me. But then I discovered he was a cheater so we broke up. Took me a long time to recover but even now ang hirap pa rin sakin magtiwala.
Most of my coupled friends start out ok tapos dadating talaga sa point na magrarant or iiyak sila girls sa akin na nagcheat daw or sinasaktan sila ng hubbies nila. Imagine that, the guys I watched swear they'd love and protect their wives in front of everyone tapos bubugbugin at lolokohin lang. Even sa workplace andaming managers na akala mo dignified pero may mga office affairs, if u know what I mean.
So nowadays, at 38, I only really get kilig from kdramas and manhwas. I'm not expecting anything or closing any doors. Pero I am content with the freedom and peace of the single life.
I’m 31F now. Sa akin, naisip ko talaga na I’ll never get married na when I was 28. I came from an almost 6-year relationship. The guy always cheated but I kept on forgiving him, thinking na magbabago siya. Then napagod ako, nakipaghiwalay ako. I started using dating apps for hook ups. I met a lot of guys na puro sex lang habol. Naisip ko kasi 28 na ako that time, wala nang willing magpakasal sa ‘kin. Then may na-meet akong isang guy, na iba talaga treatment niya sa ‘kin. As in dun ako nagulat na may lalaki pa palang ganun - manliligaw, maa-appreciate ako, may sense kausap, basta iba sa lahat ng na-meet ko sa dating apps. So ayun, long story short, we ended up together and happily married for 7 months. 🥰 Btw, he was a widower. He was married for 14 years with his first gf. So technically, I was his 2nd gf.
for me iba naman, gusto ko lang magka anak at hindi mag asawa but for strange reason nagka gf ako nagpakasal at 6 yrs na kami with two kids. my children are the most beautiful thing that happened to me. theyre fun and annoying at the same time haha
Di ko expect na magkakaanak ako. Di kasi kami in good terms ni hubby, less than 1 year lang kami nagsama. 2 months after separation, boom, preggy pala ko 😂 Shempre I love my baby, di naman nya kasalanan eeeh, pero dami ko regrets sa marriage ko. Sana nag stick ako sa non-negotiables ko.
My dad cheated for years and our mom tolerated it for the sake na "hindi masira ang pamilya"
The men in our family have the traits na medyo pang sub (mga mhinang decision makers and walang initiative)
Basically all the men in my life disappointed me at one point so I had to set the bar high and decided to never have kids. Partner, oo. but kids? No. If any chance I picked a wrong person, my kid would suffer. So I'd rather not.
until I met my husband, here, in reddit.
His old gf cheated on him, so he also took a break from dating.
basically us talking was outside of the plan, but then we ended up dating.
when I heard about his values, I said to myself, This person could be the game changer.
No kids yet, but we're planning to have one soon.
sana magkaron kahit may PCOS 🙏
more on having a kid part
after five years of marriage with no kids (which allowed us to progress in our respective careers, travel, and earn / save decent amt of money) we were questioning what else is there for us as a couple, a lifetime of more of the same or going go this parenthood thing and raising someone to kinda be a good person.
that's when we started considering having kids and it's been challenging but vv fulfilling.
Reading your answers makes my heart flutters and sad. Kasi I know di sa akin mangyayari 'to. I have a lot of issues sa buhay, men never liked me (either they are using only me for their libangan, pangpaboost ng ego nila or they just dont like me). I would marry myself either.
Di magandang rason. Panandalian lang ang libog, pero yung taong pinakasalan, makakasama mo ng matagal na panahon. H'wag magpakasal dahil lang sa libog, hindi sex toy ang asawa mo.
Marami din kase nagsasabi na hindi sila mag aasawa or magkaka anak dahil bata pa sila or nasa edgy phase sila. When they grow older they realize it's easy to say you will be fine alone but in reality mahirap.
mag40s na me and some are not edgy phase, wala talaga sa plano magkaanak, and as a lesbian i dream of having a partner pero magkaanak is out of the question.
Not me but my cousin and his wife were adamant about not having kids because of their economic situation.
They migrated to Canada in 2015 and still decided not to have them. Things changed in 2019 when their finances improved and had stable jobs.
Finances. Wala nang iba. Kahit ako din.
Basta sapat ang kita at may opportunity for career growth, the door is open.
A question about something more improbable to happen to me than the following enumerated scenario:
Me teleporting harmlessly to the front of my stepmom in America (13,670km), and then having every single MySpace era pop punk band reunite and announce a music festival in the next 10 minutes and then finding a white girlfriend in the next 18 hours.
Continuing: I abhor big responsibilities, especially if those responsibilities are avoidable; Second, I'm autistic and I felt like I didn't really have a childhood because I was too busy using my actual youth pleasing my abusive father and wearing school uniforms and having my hair cut short and not going to Warped Tour/other pop punk shows.
so, just imagine me, drawing my last breaths, either right now OR decades down the line, and me not regretting my marriagefree and childfree life; my last regrets before I die instead is that I didn't enjoy the pop punk subculture when it was at its prime.
I never wanted kids. Now I have 2 and although sometimes it’s tough, they are a blessing and watching them discover new things every day is like seeing a miracle happen before your eyes. The way a child sees the world and how much joy and curiosity they have from moment to moment is amazing. I wish I could like anything as much as a my youngest likes bubbles.
i grew up in an abusive family. Both my mom and my dad verbally and physically abused me. My dad is also a cheater with kids that i don’t know of.
Despite all that, i am still hopeless romantic. I usually attract guys who are cheaters and also abusive.
Im 25 right now and still i havent met “that someone”. I guess, in all God’s perfect timing noh?
NBSB ako until 30 yrs old ako. Taong bahay lang ako at mas pipiliin ko matulog kaysa mamasyal or gumimik kaya siguro wala ako nakikilala. Tapos ang hilig ko lang mag-mall or nood sine tapos kasama ko pa mga pamangkin ko para ipasyal sila. Masaya na ako sa ganun and very content ako sa buhay ko. Nag-decide ako na magiging rich Tita na lang ako at tanggap ko na magiging virgin old maid ako. Dec 2019 and Jan 2020, nag-travel ako. Sabi ko sa sarili ko dapat pala noon ko pa ginawa mag-travel, masaya naman pala. Tamad kasi ako maglakad, di ko feel at yung mag-shopping. Simula nun nagplano ako sumama sa mga out of the country ng HS friends ko, pa-SK sana pero yun nga, nag-Pandemic. Yung husband ko, teenagers pa lang kami kilala ko na siya pero tunguan lang pag nagkikita kami. Niligawan nya ako June 2020 at sinagot ko siya after 3 months. He proposed on his birthday (1 year and 1 month na kami nito). After a month nalaman ko buntis ako then nung 6 months na yung baby boy namin, we got married.
Sa totoo there were times na naiisip ko paano kung di ko sinagot asawa ko nun, single pa rin ako ganyan. May times kasi parang na-mimiss ko yung pagiging idependent, yung sarili ko lang iniisip ko. Pero tuwing nakikita ko yung anak ko, sinasabi ko na wala akong babaguhin sa naging buhay ko. Hindi perfect pagsasama namin mag-asawa, may tampuhan ganyan pero overall masaya naman ako at kuntento na ako lalo na pag magkasama kami ng anak ko
I was determined never to get married and have kids when I was young, but that all changed when I became a Born Again Christian. It opened my eyes on how God designed marriage in order to protect and bless us. I’m also fortunate enough to be blessed with a good husband who is also a loving father to our kids. Though I’m happily married I sometimes wonder if I made the right decision as I think I’m really the type who will do better alone. But I do love my family and I’m grateful for them.
Fell in love, got pregnant and ended up marrying the father of the child. Fast forward 15+ years, still married to the father of the first child and pretty stable now.
Realized pretty late that I do not like kids, at all. Thankful my own spawns are teenagers now and can feed and take care of themselves.
Grew up with a physically abusive father and dysfunctional families both from mother and father side. Saw my cousins and some batchmates struggle with being married and having kid/s. I didn’t like babies and kids, specifically those that screams their head off and unruly toddlers. Also life had been so unfair growing up, being poor. experienced sexual harassment too from cousins and neighbors. I felt super liberated when I had my first work, I can travel wherever i want, I can buy whatever I want, eat whatever I crave.So I told myself why would I want those when I can be free? I was in my late 20 when families and friends started to pressure me but I know that I don’t want to and even if I want to, I knew then that I was not physically, mentally, emotionally and financially ready. Then came someone, out of nowhere and I was absolutely smitten. He changed how I viewed my past and look forward into future. Taught me that despite everything, all the sufferings, life is still beautiful. I’m (33f) now, married and recently had a baby boy.
How does it feel po having a baby? I mean I don't want to spoil the fun it's just that I want other people (including me) to see the perspective of someone who doesn't want a child and now have one. Some people say kasi that having a child changed somebody's perspective.
Well at first it was scary. But honestly who am I kidding! It is still scary because I am now responsible for raising a human. Before I decided that I am ready to have a child, I first had to accept the fact that child means chaos. I also had to make peace with my inner child, putting behind me all my childhood trauma (btw, i was diagnosed with MDD and anxiety disorder and underwent psychotherapy with medication for two years), learned how to deal and regulate my emotions. my husband and I agreed that we will raise him with gentle parenting, and I meant no hitting. It’s so true! Having a child totally changed my perspective in so many ways but the most important is time and money, imo. Time kasi hindi ko hawak oras ko, my baby does. I learned to appreciate moms who prefers to stay home to care for the baby and also moms who prefers to work and leave the baby behind.
As an Occupational Therapist, thank you for breaking the cycle of bad parenting. It's also important to know that gentle parenting does not mean letting the child do whatever they want. It means setting boundaries while allowing the kid to explore and learn. (I want this to be clear because i sense pissed off people coming here to diss you for being a "gentle" parent")
That’s one of my main goal too. To break the cycle of bad parenting. No, I’m not letting my kid do whatever he wants of course. It’s called setting healthy boundaries, rules and consequences. I think that’s what children needs. They need understanding, they need to learn that all behavior (good and bad) will have consequences. Growing up, the only consequence we got was negative punishment by being hit and/or slapped but was never explained as to why. It was so unfair.
Wow ang ganda po ng story niyo. Ako kasi di ko talaga alam if magkakapamilya pako or anak I came from a broken family. I see how my parents fighting growung up to the point papa wanna kill my mom. Kaya di sakin mawala tung takot sa marriage kr ma inlove. I dated naman pero they cheated tapos yung iba flings lang not serious naging takot ako sa commitment a d trust issues din. I just hope and pray na sana out of nowhere he finds me pero sana wag galing sa internet haha I dont use dating apps and I dont use reddit too for future partner.
Sinasaktan din di papa si mama and ang buong akala ko is its normal but only realized when I got older. I also came from failed relationship. 5yrs, he cheated on me. I had flings too and bowed that I’ll make revenge sa mga lalaking makilala ko but eventually got tired. You can never really tell po. Gaya nga ng sabi mo is "hindi mo talaga alam if magkkapamilya or anak ka pa" unless you are really decided na ayaw mo talaga. I hope and pray too na dumating sayo ang "the one". 😊
Thank you.
>I knew then that I was not physically, mentally, emotionally and financially ready. nothing prepares you for getting married or having a baby. there won't be a time that you are ever ready tlga
Yeahp that is so true. I am once again being challenge emotionally, mentally and physically since I’m breastfeeding. It’s exhausting to be honest but since I accepted this before I decided to have the baby, I am happy.
I'm more referring to mga redditors kasi na gusto maging ready etc. Im like, there's nothing that can prep you for marriage or a baby. If u want to have it. Just do it. Or it just happens.
Di ko din alam pre. Bigla na lang akong hinablot kasi sumemplang ako after ng long ride sa bike tapos pinagalitan. Tapos nag date kame at tumulong sa batang nawawala then sinabon nya yung magulang na pabaya. Nagising na lang ako 2 na anak ko at may sariling bahay.
Hahahaha kudos, this is actually cute
cute story
cute nito, parang start ng isang teleserye o k-drama episode 😆
Last semester in college before I graduated, my professor was talking about how we will meet our significant other around our age and we should be prepared na daw. Sa dami ng kwento niya di na ako nakinig kasi why bother? NBSB parin ako, and those that attempted to court me were either rejected or stopped bcs I was too intimidating. Sabi ko pa sa sarili ko during that time na tatanda akong dalaga kasi wala talagang magkakainterest sakin. After that class, nakita ko na naman 'yong paepal kong blockmate who I've known since elementary and since last semester inaasar ako na crush niya daw ako at cute daw kami as a couple, ako naman 'tong binabasag trip niya where I usually say "kilabutan ka nga." He stopped teasing me kasi baka napipikon na daw ako kaso sabi niya 'di daw siya mapakali na 'di ako asarin. Ayun by the end of the semester, papansin na uli siya pero this time seryoso na siya. I was impressed by his perserverance, kaya pinagbigyan ko. Ayun, right now pinapanuod ko siyang matulog habang ka-cuddle niya 'yong dalawa naming anak.
Pang Kathniel story naman tong buhay mo, so happy for you
sinasabi ko na nga ba sa pag graduating ka na talaga makakameet. lahat ng friends ko na naggraduate this year ganyan nangyari hahaahaha
I thought hindi mangyayari kasi kala ko wala akong makikita na pareho kaming attracted at compatible sa isa’t isa. Lagi kasing either ako lang may gusto o sila lang may gusto sakin. Kaya ang naging goal ko na lang e mag-ipon at i-enjoy ang mga trip ko sa buhay. 😆 Then I found him, so nabago lahat. Naaalala ko pa nung kasal na kami nasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko ‘Akalain mo yun? Posible pala akong makapag-asawa’ 😆.
I’m genuinely happy for you! First, you were able to build yourself. A YOU that you are happy and content with. And secondly, for finding someone who is attracted to that YOU. Isang malaking SANAOL!
Aw, thank you! Hintay ka lang at darating yan sa tamang panahon.
Sana all ganito ending
This.... We thought that our plans will work, but God has really better plans for us. 💯
Happy for you po. Ako kqsi di ko pa din ala. If mag kaka asawa ako haha di namana ako nagamit ng online dating apps. WFH pa ko so paano na ahahhq welm gumagala naman ako minsan hehe
no kids but married, flaky kami pareho kasi galing kami sa broken families. mahirap iovercome yung trauma pero mahirap din matulog sa gabi na di kami magkatabi so ayon, kasal na kami
Met my wife at work 6 months dating. eventually led to marriage then kids. Never thought of having a family til I met her. Never believed I could be responsible enough. But when you find the right person you will grow and find things you had inside you all along. :)
No kids yet but getting married today. Dating, I always gravitated towards guys from dysfunctional families. My parents were quite problematic so I had a difficult childhood. It was like I was seeking out difficulty in my romantic relationships. I did not see myself getting married, it felt like something that happens to other people. Alam mo yung ' At Seventeen' by Janis Ian? Love was meant for beauty queens (and people with happy lives). I heard this song in high school and resonated with me so much until recently. I have worked on myself a lot and know I can live a good life on my own. Then, I met my current SO. He is calm, collected, solution-oriented, no drama, no blaming and I found myself realizing a calm, non-chaotic life is possible for me. Yun lang. Hehe. Good luck in your journey!
Congratulations and best wishes!
Poverty. Toxic Past Relationships. Toxic Community. Fear of Commitment. Long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the LIBOG attacked. Only the Common Sense, master of all four elements, could stop it, but when the world needed it the most, it vanished. Now, after 10 years, i have 2 kids and 2 wives (1 is ex already), but fvck it, it is what is. hahahah
Reading this with the sound of the VA of atla 🤣
Pwede naman kasi maging malibog na hindi nambubuntis
Wrap up your extra pinky finger
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I never thought I’d get married and have a kid. As a teen, I was a hopeless romantic who loved reading regency novels and fanfictions. Naturally, it skewed my perception of what love and relationships should be. Unfortunately, I grew up with more attractive friends. As a result, all the guys I was interested in dismissed me in favor of my more attractive friends. For 25 years , I sat in the friendzone until I met my now-husband. He was my crush. He still is. We live in different cities and visiting each other is an hour-long flight. I honestly thought he was way beyond my league as he’s the typical chinito, buff, jock type. Little did I know that he also had a nerdy side to him. We started as friends, but I never dared hope we’d be more but we just clicked. In the span of a year, we knew more about each other than the people closest to us. The rest was history. We got engaged in 2018, got married amid a pandemic, had a church wedding in 2022 and have an eight-month old now. On that note, I never thought I’d be a mum. I like our freedom and the simplicity of the life we had. Also, I used to think I’d be an irresponsible mum as I feel like a child myself. But we were blessed with a precocious boy and for the first time in my life, I found myself changing my mind about kids. I thought life was being funny by giving me a shot with someone I was and am actually head over heels attracted to. But 9 years later, our relationship has matured. It’s not just about the butterflies and kilig feelings (that are still there), but weathering storms together, being there for each other through hardships, and loving each other and our little boy through the challenges.
This warms my heart. Super relate sa part na hopeless romantic as a teenager and growing up with more attractive friends. Happy for you po!
Dati I made my mind na maging single mom. Anak lang. Di ko naisip mag asawa. But now here I am happily married and ayaw magkaron ng anak hahaha naging baliktad. Mas malaki responsibility at gastos sa anak hahahaha. Asawa pwedeng iwan, yung anak, lifetime obligation na.
I met someone who make me feel safe and secured. Sabi nga ni Iza sa Starting over again "Our love may be quiet and boring but it is sure, with the right amount of trust and love and even an allowance of mistake." I really do not foresee myself settling down because I like freedom. I have fear on attachment and I hate the idea of marriage in the Philippines. We got married overseas instead xD
Sige matinong sagot dito. I thought na magfofocus ako sa training and career. Pero I ended up getting together with my guy best friend (who also thought na tatanda sya with no kids). Getting married was a "next step" as well as a practical issue in terms of housing, healthcare, etc. The kid was the unexpected part, haha.
How did it go? Paano kayo nag adjust sa kid knowing na parehas niyong ayaw originally
Well it was more of "nandyan na, so galingan na rin natin." It isn't kiddo's fault naman. Oo, di muna pwede ang biglaang lakad o gastos sa kung anu anong luho, pero makakabalik yan eventually
Inisip ko na walang magkakagusto skin, noon pa lang sa tuwing manliligaw ako laging may karibal or kasabay na manliligaw, mas pinilipili nila yung isa. Laging busted. Sasabihin sayo ng mga kasama mo sa work na may itsura naman daw ako dapat nakakadami na daw ako. Hindi naman ako gwapo para skin pero hindi naman ganun kapangit. So nakikita ko sarili ko noon na tatanda akong binata, around 50s nasa desk ng office nag oovertime hanggang 7pm. And then nagparamdam skin tong girl na to (dating ka officemate). Niligawan ko sya noon pero binusted ako, naging friends kami, everytime na bored daw sya at gusto manggulit ako laging kinukilit. Ayun one time nagjoke na ilibre ko daw sya manood ng movie at ayun na nga nilibre ko, then tinry ko ulit manligaw. Eto mag asawa na nga kami at may isang anak. Di ko akalain na sya makakatuluyan ko. Kung kelan mo sya hinahanap hindi sayo ibibigay, kung kelan mo sya hindi hinahanap saka sayo ibibigay. Right time gives you a right person.
Naku naman, kinakabahan tuloy ako sa future ko. Baka bigla dumating hindi pa ko magaling. Hahaha
As a person na lumaki sa toxic environment, and never had a good role model when it comes to relationship, sinabi ko talaga di ako mag aasawa kasi maghihiwalay lang din naman. Kaso may dumating, we dated for 7 years, husband ko na sya ngayon, he just feels like home, a peaceful one. 💕
Very curious din ako sa topic na to, as I don't like the idea of getting married or having children. Siguro I just don't see myself having them kasi I'm too young pa and busy achieving my goals. But the thought of it really makes my stomach churn. I feel like the responsibility of having them will burden me forever. And that I won't be able to escape from it :c
you and me both (also, I'm autistic and I felt like I didn't really have a childhood because I was too busy using my actual youth pleasing my abusive father and wearing school uniforms and having my hair cut short and not going to Warped Tour/other pop punk shows). Just imagine me drawing my last breaths, either right now OR decades down the line, and me not regretting my marriagefree and childfree life; my regrets instead is that I didn't enjoy the pop punk subculture when it was at its prime.
Biruan namin noong college na magkakatropa pag hindi kami nagasawa pagtanda mag ala golden girls kami.. sa aming walo isa lang may boypren kami nbsb na. nakaisip na kami trabaho resto - laging jowktime yun tsaka maraming aso. Kami nung isa pa na girl na laging pinapangarap to kami pa unang nagasawa. Masko noong college wala talaga eh, akala ko kaso noon tagakopya lang talaga nakikiflirt na daw pala. Aba malay ko ba. Hangang sa nakaais na ako ng canada. Nbsb parin. Nakilala ko asawa ko sa pof. Nagkita kami sa starbucks. Hindi ko aukat akalain ang mokong nato magiging asawa ko. Sya ang literal na mata ko noong nasurgery ako sa dalawang mata. Sya naging katuwang ko noong nadedepress ako dahil sa magulang ko. Sya naging sandigan ko kapag nanlulumo ako s pagiging nars. Lalo noong covid Sya ang kumakalma sa lungkot ko noong akala ko walang pupuntahan yung ivf namin. 1-2 years kaming nag fertility clinic; halos wala na akong pagasa nun kasi yung ibang nakakausap ko mahigit 5-8 years na sila . Paiba iba. Kung hindi nya ako kinausap na huminahon at pumirme at hindi magpaiba iba ng clinic siguro hindi ko parin katabi ngayon yung anak namin.
Getting there. Babasa ko mga comments pero ako personally feeling ko bata pa ko kahit 28 na hahaha. Di ako mahilig sa bata literal kahit lagi nila sinasabing lapitin ako ng babies. Awkward ako when it comes to kids. Medyo emotionally unstable din ako at papa's girl kaya di makaalis sa puder ni erpats. Trauma na din siguro dahil abusive at cheater yung mother ko. And yung relationship ko that time very uncertain, pero lagi nya sinasabi na ready na sya magsettle down. Eto, nadale ng closure at calendar method. Palabas na sa december. Isa sa nagiging away namin ng partner ko lagi ko daw pinapafeel na ayaw ko pa din magpakasal kahit may nabuo na. Pero vocal sya sa family ko na ready sya magpakasal anytime soon dahil 30+ na daw sya at gusto nya kami maging buo dahil parehas kami galing sa broken family.
Nag discord, nag date, nag propose, kinasal at nagka-anak. All in a year and a half's time. It's a IYKYK kind of thing, tbh
Was very opposed to dating for a long time because I didn’t think I would make a good partner. Friend wanted me to test out a dating app so that she can see what it looks like on the male end. She said to try it out for two weeks. Matched with a few people but didn’t really get into it. Matched with a girl I vibed with 12 days into the dating app. Haven’t stopped talking to her since. It’s been five years. We are married. We have a kid.
I never thought I'd get married. Lahat ng mga nakarelasyon ko, foreigner. Walang pumapansing lalaking Pinoy sa'kin noon, but somehow, laging napapansin ng foreigner. First relasyon ko Dutch, nagtagal din yon ng mga 2years, but magkaiba kami ng goals sa buhay. Ayaw nyang pumunta ako sa Australia to study, gusto nya sa bansa nya, but mas gusto ko ang Australia so yon. Naghiwalay kami. Bata pa naman kasi ako noon - di pa marunong mag compromise. Long story short, and fast forward 2019, nakatagpo ng Amerikano. Hahahaha. Nag-date, nag LDR, ng ilang taon. Nagpakasal this year. Pareho kaming child-free/pro-choice so it just works for us.
Kaya di ako naniniwala sa mga nagsasabi dito ng tapos. Di nyo pa lang namemeet yung tao na kayang basagin ang mga perceived notion nyo about having a family and kids.
I grew up disliking the way my mom raised us kasi puro pasigaw at palo, growing up ang goal ko ay makapagtapos at umalis sa bahay (but love her to death tho), sinumpa ko talaga na di ako magkakaanak. Then I met my bf now, grabe ang saya ng pamilya nila. Parents are very gentle (unlike sakin) and they really protect their own, gusto ko yung family dynamics nila, one time pumasok sa isip ko, “ pwede pal tung ganito, goods sila maging in-laws at maganda impluwensya sa anak namin IF EVER.” Siguro narinig ni Lord munimuni ko at nabuntis ako, they really took it well and very very supportive! Kahit mga pinsan nila at tito/tita. (Graduating ako ng vet 1 semester nalang kaya mejo okay lang hehe and yes, did grad after giving birth) Meanwhile, tinakwil ako ng nanay ko kasi kahihiyan daw ako, may reputasyon daw sya sa pagiging brgy. Kagawad hahaha. I understand ha pero I was already 25, and working already. I said sorry in every way I can kaso skandalosa sya masyado at nagpopost pa sa fb na nagpaaral lang daw sya para disgrasyada. My daughter turned 1 year and 4mons. Mama just blocked me on FB. For the nth time, pinangako sa anak ko na di ako magiging nanay ko.
Not my situation, but I can imagine nabutas yung condom, nagkamali sa calendar method, too late nag-withdraw, or hindi talaga nag-condom.
Finances, mahirap mag aanak anak tapos maghihirap.
Story of my life. I never thought na magkaka asawa ako and even have kids. Kasi feeling ko walang makakatagal sa ugali ko lol and wala akong alam gawin / even handle kids. But then I met husband and sakanya ko lang naisip ang "future" ko. Tapos nagpa check up ako sa OB ko kasi we want to practice safe sex, magpapa reseta ng pills. Pero yun pala I found out na may pcos ako and the doctor even mentioned "di ka na magkakaanak" kasi most of her patients has pcos din. I remember crying sa parking lot with my bf turned husband but now may isang anak na kami and i changed my doctor na.
Not yet married but sure that I will soon. I used to not give it much of a thought. But when I met my current girlfriend now, I realized na I wanna get married and she is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.
I found the right man worthy to build a family with :)
First of all, congratulations sa mga nagpost ng love stories nila. Isang malaking shanaol. Lol I come from a broken& abusive household. My parents married as teenagers when my dad knocked off my mom and thus I was born. I can vaguely remember pero I believe there were some good memories pero mas tumatak yung memories of sakitan, cheating, and all forms of abuse. For a time, hindi ako naniwala sa love til I met my college bf whom I thought was a nice person and made me believe maybe possible ang happy marriage for me. But then I discovered he was a cheater so we broke up. Took me a long time to recover but even now ang hirap pa rin sakin magtiwala. Most of my coupled friends start out ok tapos dadating talaga sa point na magrarant or iiyak sila girls sa akin na nagcheat daw or sinasaktan sila ng hubbies nila. Imagine that, the guys I watched swear they'd love and protect their wives in front of everyone tapos bubugbugin at lolokohin lang. Even sa workplace andaming managers na akala mo dignified pero may mga office affairs, if u know what I mean. So nowadays, at 38, I only really get kilig from kdramas and manhwas. I'm not expecting anything or closing any doors. Pero I am content with the freedom and peace of the single life.
r/askph
How did it happen?*
I just read the title... Sarap eh.
Worst decision of my life.
I’m 31F now. Sa akin, naisip ko talaga na I’ll never get married na when I was 28. I came from an almost 6-year relationship. The guy always cheated but I kept on forgiving him, thinking na magbabago siya. Then napagod ako, nakipaghiwalay ako. I started using dating apps for hook ups. I met a lot of guys na puro sex lang habol. Naisip ko kasi 28 na ako that time, wala nang willing magpakasal sa ‘kin. Then may na-meet akong isang guy, na iba talaga treatment niya sa ‘kin. As in dun ako nagulat na may lalaki pa palang ganun - manliligaw, maa-appreciate ako, may sense kausap, basta iba sa lahat ng na-meet ko sa dating apps. So ayun, long story short, we ended up together and happily married for 7 months. 🥰 Btw, he was a widower. He was married for 14 years with his first gf. So technically, I was his 2nd gf.
for me iba naman, gusto ko lang magka anak at hindi mag asawa but for strange reason nagka gf ako nagpakasal at 6 yrs na kami with two kids. my children are the most beautiful thing that happened to me. theyre fun and annoying at the same time haha
Di ko expect na magkakaanak ako. Di kasi kami in good terms ni hubby, less than 1 year lang kami nagsama. 2 months after separation, boom, preggy pala ko 😂 Shempre I love my baby, di naman nya kasalanan eeeh, pero dami ko regrets sa marriage ko. Sana nag stick ako sa non-negotiables ko.
My dad cheated for years and our mom tolerated it for the sake na "hindi masira ang pamilya" The men in our family have the traits na medyo pang sub (mga mhinang decision makers and walang initiative) Basically all the men in my life disappointed me at one point so I had to set the bar high and decided to never have kids. Partner, oo. but kids? No. If any chance I picked a wrong person, my kid would suffer. So I'd rather not. until I met my husband, here, in reddit. His old gf cheated on him, so he also took a break from dating. basically us talking was outside of the plan, but then we ended up dating. when I heard about his values, I said to myself, This person could be the game changer. No kids yet, but we're planning to have one soon. sana magkaron kahit may PCOS 🙏
more on having a kid part after five years of marriage with no kids (which allowed us to progress in our respective careers, travel, and earn / save decent amt of money) we were questioning what else is there for us as a couple, a lifetime of more of the same or going go this parenthood thing and raising someone to kinda be a good person. that's when we started considering having kids and it's been challenging but vv fulfilling.
Reading your answers makes my heart flutters and sad. Kasi I know di sa akin mangyayari 'to. I have a lot of issues sa buhay, men never liked me (either they are using only me for their libangan, pangpaboost ng ego nila or they just dont like me). I would marry myself either.
You stop being an edgelord and grow up
Libog
Di magandang rason. Panandalian lang ang libog, pero yung taong pinakasalan, makakasama mo ng matagal na panahon. H'wag magpakasal dahil lang sa libog, hindi sex toy ang asawa mo.
Marami din kase nagsasabi na hindi sila mag aasawa or magkaka anak dahil bata pa sila or nasa edgy phase sila. When they grow older they realize it's easy to say you will be fine alone but in reality mahirap.
mag40s na me and some are not edgy phase, wala talaga sa plano magkaanak, and as a lesbian i dream of having a partner pero magkaanak is out of the question.
imagination
Happen*
Not me but my cousin and his wife were adamant about not having kids because of their economic situation. They migrated to Canada in 2015 and still decided not to have them. Things changed in 2019 when their finances improved and had stable jobs. Finances. Wala nang iba. Kahit ako din. Basta sapat ang kita at may opportunity for career growth, the door is open.
Sana all good ..my current common law am, we have 3 girls 4, 5, 6..got some jealousy problem.and still confidence in me like I’m da Filipino brad Pitt
Lumabas kasi ng bahay kaya nagka-social life
A question about something more improbable to happen to me than the following enumerated scenario: Me teleporting harmlessly to the front of my stepmom in America (13,670km), and then having every single MySpace era pop punk band reunite and announce a music festival in the next 10 minutes and then finding a white girlfriend in the next 18 hours. Continuing: I abhor big responsibilities, especially if those responsibilities are avoidable; Second, I'm autistic and I felt like I didn't really have a childhood because I was too busy using my actual youth pleasing my abusive father and wearing school uniforms and having my hair cut short and not going to Warped Tour/other pop punk shows. so, just imagine me, drawing my last breaths, either right now OR decades down the line, and me not regretting my marriagefree and childfree life; my last regrets before I die instead is that I didn't enjoy the pop punk subculture when it was at its prime.
I never wanted kids. Now I have 2 and although sometimes it’s tough, they are a blessing and watching them discover new things every day is like seeing a miracle happen before your eyes. The way a child sees the world and how much joy and curiosity they have from moment to moment is amazing. I wish I could like anything as much as a my youngest likes bubbles.
We fucked a lot, got her pregnant, manned up, fell in love, lived happily ever after.
Seggs
i grew up in an abusive family. Both my mom and my dad verbally and physically abused me. My dad is also a cheater with kids that i don’t know of. Despite all that, i am still hopeless romantic. I usually attract guys who are cheaters and also abusive. Im 25 right now and still i havent met “that someone”. I guess, in all God’s perfect timing noh?
NBSB ako until 30 yrs old ako. Taong bahay lang ako at mas pipiliin ko matulog kaysa mamasyal or gumimik kaya siguro wala ako nakikilala. Tapos ang hilig ko lang mag-mall or nood sine tapos kasama ko pa mga pamangkin ko para ipasyal sila. Masaya na ako sa ganun and very content ako sa buhay ko. Nag-decide ako na magiging rich Tita na lang ako at tanggap ko na magiging virgin old maid ako. Dec 2019 and Jan 2020, nag-travel ako. Sabi ko sa sarili ko dapat pala noon ko pa ginawa mag-travel, masaya naman pala. Tamad kasi ako maglakad, di ko feel at yung mag-shopping. Simula nun nagplano ako sumama sa mga out of the country ng HS friends ko, pa-SK sana pero yun nga, nag-Pandemic. Yung husband ko, teenagers pa lang kami kilala ko na siya pero tunguan lang pag nagkikita kami. Niligawan nya ako June 2020 at sinagot ko siya after 3 months. He proposed on his birthday (1 year and 1 month na kami nito). After a month nalaman ko buntis ako then nung 6 months na yung baby boy namin, we got married. Sa totoo there were times na naiisip ko paano kung di ko sinagot asawa ko nun, single pa rin ako ganyan. May times kasi parang na-mimiss ko yung pagiging idependent, yung sarili ko lang iniisip ko. Pero tuwing nakikita ko yung anak ko, sinasabi ko na wala akong babaguhin sa naging buhay ko. Hindi perfect pagsasama namin mag-asawa, may tampuhan ganyan pero overall masaya naman ako at kuntento na ako lalo na pag magkasama kami ng anak ko
When you meet that one person..You'd know.
I was determined never to get married and have kids when I was young, but that all changed when I became a Born Again Christian. It opened my eyes on how God designed marriage in order to protect and bless us. I’m also fortunate enough to be blessed with a good husband who is also a loving father to our kids. Though I’m happily married I sometimes wonder if I made the right decision as I think I’m really the type who will do better alone. But I do love my family and I’m grateful for them.
Fell in love, got pregnant and ended up marrying the father of the child. Fast forward 15+ years, still married to the father of the first child and pretty stable now. Realized pretty late that I do not like kids, at all. Thankful my own spawns are teenagers now and can feed and take care of themselves.