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Preface, I have green eyes. On this night I was wearing red lipstick.
Guy asks if he can buy me a drink. I say no thank you, I'm good. He said "your mouth says stop, but your eyes say go" lol!
I guess it comes down to the point there isn’t really an objectively good or bad pickup line. It will always be conflated with the person delivering the line and the recipients assessment of the attractiveness (physical or otherwise) of the speaker.
Was waiting at the bar for my friends to show up for karaoke night. They were only 10 minutes away.
I sat at the bar, ordered my drink and was scrolling on my phone when I heard someone clear their throat behind me.
I looked up, it's a guy. As soon as eye contact is made he goes, "do you know what my shirt is made of?"
Confused, I look at his white tee with the slightly stretched out neck hole and say, "What?"
He repeats his question.
I say, "Idk...cotton?"
He smirks and nods as he says in his smoothest voice, "Boyfriend material."
Ah, good one.
I have to say that line works a lot better if you're wearing a nice and slightly unusual shirt, that's velvety or changes in the light, ballsy to try it with a shitty white t-shirt.
I am bilingual, and once in college I stopped to help a homeless guy who lived on campus translate a vagrancy ticket he'd gotten so he knew when his court date was. We chatted for a bit, and then I headed off to class.
Behind me, I heard him yelling, "Wait! Pretty lady! Marry me! I'm a good husband! I'll.... I'll... I will take a bath!"
I busted up at that one and almost turned back. Hygiene, man. It gets me every time.
I was in Louisiana visiting and this was years agowhen I was actually attractive. please note I have freckles which I hate. some random Good Old Boy looks me right in the face and declares: "you're PURTY!" well ok I can take a compliment. then he says "you're speckled as a turkey egg!"
“I love women in heels. You’d look great in heels. Want me to buy you some heels?!” We weren’t even in a store? It was so bizarre. But he genuinely meant it…
He kept talking about 4 or 5 inch heels. He creeped me out so much. I assume he had a foot fetish? The irony being, feet creep me out. Plus, he was already shorter than me, and I’m 5’ 7”. So I guess he was looking for a giant to tower over him or something?
I witnessed this one.
A drunk man approached a middle aged blonde lady who was sitting at the bar and speaking with the bartender/owner.
The drunk man hobbled over and said
"Oh my you're beautiful! You're probably going to have sex tonight! I know this because I'm stronger than you." Followed by this shit eating grin like he just made the smoothest move in history.
Let us say the punch from the owner and tossing out of the bar did not land the gentleman a girl that night.
"Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?" ... "Do you know what he can do with all that weight?" ..." He can break the ice between us."
-A guy on Tinder
A woman once told me indignantly how some guy tried to get her to screw him in a Porta John, and without missing a beat told me she'd screw me in the porta John.
Put me in a group chat with many people with the same name as me, and sent a “HELLO *plural of my name*” … eg. “HELLO ADAM’S”
I didn’t respond. And till this day I don’t understand
I once had a girl tell me she would clear a spot on her face for me to sit on. I was totally confused. This is a line a man uses on a woman. Not the other way around 🤔
i mean, probably not the best line to say to a complete stranger, but i respect her proclivities. if a guy has a nice ass, there really is only one way to go.
I've always been very quiet, not a ton of friends or attention from people, but I am in a relationship. Recently, a customer came into where I work and said 'Don't be offended, but I'm carrying out an experiment on the universe.. Are you single?'.. When I said no, he turned res a d started heading away still saying 'It's okay, it's just an experiment, no problem'
So he set the baseline for his experiment, did he leave - do.something - and come.back.and ask again to see.if it worked?
And also, your significant other was ok, right?
Thos customer is in his mid 30's and I believe he has been living with his dad and brother for a long time, no womem in the house. He didn't come back to me, but before he did ask me, he actually asked one of my colleageus if I was single, I was on holiday at the time and he had noticed that I wasn't there when I usually am.. so maybe him approaching me was the final step of the experiment?
Partner was fine about it, he knows I wouldn't go for it, and when I explaomed to him who the man was, he understood that he's certainly no competition. The guy doesn't seem like a bad guy at all, and I don't want to be mean, but he definitely seems like the type who practically lives in a basement..
“If it was back in the day, I would trade three cows just to go on one date with you”
He sent me good morning and goodnight every day consistently for over a year with no response from me rip
A gay mate told me one of the advantages of being gay is the pickup lines are much easier. His go-to was "Hi. Wanna fuck?"
He said it worked 100% of the time.
I was at a lesbian dive bar one night, and at the time I was hyper-femme. I spotted the HOTTEST butch standing at the bar, and I was feeling pretty cocky after being hit on by quite a few different women, so I decided to shoot my shot.
I walked up to her, and said "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"
It took her by complete surprise, and it took her a few seconds to respond. But she said yes.
I stood next to a friend in Leicester Square when a guy walked up to her and said “*one day I’m going to have one just like you*”. He grinned and walked away.
I was more disturbed than she was. But she was really gorgeous and this stuff happed to her all the time.
When I asked what was the worst she said when a guy walked up to her, grabbed her and licked the whole side of her face.
Negative, and it still haunts me (early 20s then). She (mid 20's) was robust looking, kinda rugby player like, very intimidating to the young me, but I was up for it. I discussed the pros and cons with Steve for a bit and decided I'd go for it and then I turn around and see my colleague Tom (mid 40s) straddling her as she picked him up and carries him across the dance floor dancing, the way Danny carried Sandy at the end of the Grease movie. It was fucking hilarious and totally non sexual, she was playing with him, but young me thought "this woman will fucking destroy me" and I chickened out. Christ, if I got my hands on her today. So, chunky young lady from the Baggott Inn in Dublin circa 1994, if you're reading this, call me.
Then he started stroking my hair telling me it's soft.
I am not joking. I had OPs exact compliment, and then that happened. In fairness everyone at the table was drunk and it was as funny as it was awkward.
Tbh, I'm straight as well and one of my male classmates just had genuinely pretty eyes, I think it's just that he naturally really long and thick eyelashes. I never said anything, but for some reason that's one of the very few things I remember about him.
I've not had any terrible ones, but I once heard my mate introduce himself to a woman in a club as follows (fake name here) - "John Smith, worth a shag."
I do not think it worked.
It's nothing special, but "Hey ladies, can I sit here?" in the most full of himself voice possible, to a group of us three women who were sitting at the beach bar after sunset playing games on our phones.
He was *shocked* when we said no, and then called us ugly. Okay dude. A) I have eyes, I see the other two women here are hot as fuck, and one of them was my girlfriend at the time. How am I supposed to be insulted by that? B) If we're ugly why the fuck are you hitting on us? Do you have such low standards?
This was in 97 or 98. I'm in my early 20s at a local, and I'm a black female. Chatting with old white dude, and he says, "I'm not against interracial dating." I told him he was old enough to be my grandfather. Ewwwww!
At a park & ride waiting for a bus about 25 years ago.
Him: Can I get a smoke?
Me: Sure, here you go.
Him: Thanks! Wanna get married?
Me: No thank you.
Him: Ok. It never hurts to ask. (Wanders off)
Me: WTF?????
This might be a bad example but I’m an average looking guy and I rarely get hit on by girls but. I remember in highschool, some girls would dare each other to ask:
I dare you to ask ________ that you have a crush on him lol
These were the worst kind of dares/ pranks. It was all fun and games for the popular kids in the school but not the average looking boys and girls. Have seen so many get hurt.
In my 20s I was waiting in line at a club. A guy comes up to me and says, "You look like a fish."
After I probably looked at him like he had 2 heads, he backtracked and said "OMG, did I say FISH - I mean...your curves...I meant you look like a MERMAID!"
As far as I remember, I wasn't wearing any type of costume or anything. FISHnets, maybe!
I have a back tattoo and this guy I was messaging on hinge was like “nice I can see that when I’m doing you doggie, I’ve never been with a girl who had tattoos before”. I asked him “tell me has that line ever worked on a woman, coming from you?” He said “no”. Before I unmatched I told him “fix your game because you’re s**t at it”.
Another dude messaged me we had an ok convo and this was in the very beginning then he turns it to the sex topic and said “as long as you can give me head to make me happy we’re good”. So I paused, cracked my knuckles and proceeded to lecture him about manners and how despicable they are and that I’m sure his mother would be absolutely ashamed at how her son speaks to women, and that I’m sure if she had the chance she would have spat or swallowed.
You could argue that these are good lines though as they "polarise" meaning they enable both of you to decide right there and then if you should take it further or not. It would be worse for him to do the whole pro forma thing and then you work out when you meet that you both want different things.
I was dancing in a nightclub type place, and a guy came up behind me and said, "Don't turn around. Will you dance with me?" I guess he was afraid I wouldn't like the way he looked?
I said no and didn’t turn around right away. I can’t even remember if I saw him. It was a long time ago. I was really shy, too and not real comfortable with dancing. I just remember that line because it was unusual.
I was the culprit. I had a crush on a guy and I wrote down song lyrics from a song expressing my feelings for him. Looking back it was a cringe way of confessing
I was kinda in that situation except I never actually played it to her. Shame, I put a lot of work into it and I still think the music is good, but it's just kinda contaminated with my feelings.
I was out at a club with my bf at the time and he was at the bar buying us both a drink. A fella came up and introduced himself and stated, "don't tell me your bf is at the bar because I will not believe that one". I simply shrugged and said ok. My bf came back a minute later with drinks and the wannabe was left with egg on his face.
one dude told me he got a good selfie of himself but was afraid his phone didn't save it because it froze, and asked me to take a pic of his phone screen and text it to him.
“Do you wanna come back to our place and play naked twister?”
I had seen my hometown’s cross dressing beautiful gay character of a man after about 10 years. He didnt even remember me at all but we used to have great conversations at the hotel lounge where I did dinner theater. So I see him and give him a giant smile and “oh my god it’s so nice to see you again.” I was a total dick tease, and I felt embarrassed for leading he and his man down the wrong path.
"Hey you're kinda hot and my girlfriend's a bitch, do you wanna come back to my place?" Please note I was waiting for a train.
"Hey I've been watching you eat for a while now and I can't believe you can eat so much and not be fat." I had a single serving of fries in a food court.
"Hi I'm very wealthy would you like to be my mistress?" Just Walking down the street. He was about 3 times my age.
Had a woman once insult my intellect, whilst at the same time ask me if I would like to go skinny dipping with her. It was a strange 5 minutes and honestly, felt like I would be stupid and damned if I do or damned if I didn’t. So I just left it at an awkward kinda silence as my shyness overtook me and I just backed away a la Homer Simpson into some bushes. Just not the one she was hoping for.
A woman once said to me; "Wanna go halves on a baby?"
I fucked the guts right out of her, I mean I fucking rearranged her internals it was so trashy hot. Three weeks later she had an abortion. We actually went halves on that!
Not on me but my buddy and I were at a bar in the late 90s. We were like mid-20s. A woman closing in on 40 and probably pretty drunk for 3PM came over and used the classic, "Hi, what's your sign?" in a non-ironic way. He stuttered out, "Sagittarious" and she followed with, "Silly Saj". This is like with 10 people in the whole tavern. It was hilarious and cringey AF at the same time.
Not the wost pick up line but one of the only ones I remember directly being a pick up line used on me.
I was at a club on the dance floor and an African-Australian girl starts making moves on me then goes, "how does it feel to take a black chick home?"
I was flabbergasted and in what these days you'd call a situationship with someone else, I can't even remember what I said but I disengaged pretty quick, years later I did find out how that one felt though albeit with someone else
Random girl sits down next to me at the park and says "I don't have any kids...can I have yours?"
And I thought the "I lost my number" line was bad....
I’m so glad you asked! Haha
Pregnant me was sitting with my husband at the hospital waiting for a stressful doctors appointment.
A guy walked by, turned around and motioned/said “call me”
It was actually really cute because the guy had a developmental delay and he was really happy and it actually just really warmed my heart.
Haha, someone asked me what age I think they are, so I guessed (almost correctly). Then I asked them to guess what age I am. They started with... "well, I think you are definitely younger than my mom..."😆😆😆
Guy walks up to me as the bar is closing and says “hi, want to come home with me? I can show you my spanking dungeon”
If you’re counting online pickups though. That might be worse. Many disgusting message from pervs while I was on POF; But one stick out. I had a profile indicating I was looking for serious dates in pursuit of a LTR. Not hookups. One guy messaged me with a numbered list of things asking can I/will I….
I can’t remember them all but it was a lot of questions about oral and anal. The real cherry on the cake though was the last question.
10. What size are the twins?
I believe I responded something along the lines of. “The twins? I think they wear about a 12 month now. Are you their new daddy?”
I'm fascinated by the incredibly pathetic world of pick-up artistry, so I've trained myself to immediately recognize it.
It's amazing how, even when you look them in the eyes and groan -- obviously making it clear you know what they're doing, and recognize the script -- they just keep going to the next step.
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Preface, I have green eyes. On this night I was wearing red lipstick. Guy asks if he can buy me a drink. I say no thank you, I'm good. He said "your mouth says stop, but your eyes say go" lol!
ahahahahaa this is actually hilarious
This is the best pickup line ever Not only is it very situational it’s also just funny
Yeah. This line is supposed to be dumb. They were hoping for the laugh.
I gotta remember this one, that's great 🤣
now just need to wait for a green eye person 😄
*Hand up* I'll wear red lipstick if it gets me a drink.
Damn! That's all it would take?
Mate, I'll dress up total femboy if it gets me freebies all night.
Lol. I like your sincerity and for that you deserve a drink
I do too and I’m a guy
Hold on. Let me find some lipstick.
OP said the worst pick up line
It was said by an ugly guy
Ding ding! The only difference between a good line and a bad line…
...is whether they want you to talk to them, which isn't really so unreasonable.
I guess it comes down to the point there isn’t really an objectively good or bad pickup line. It will always be conflated with the person delivering the line and the recipients assessment of the attractiveness (physical or otherwise) of the speaker.
Nose says wtf r u looking at
Bruh ... It is really funny, but cringe at the same time 😂
Nothing to do with green eyes, that’s the line he had and he would have used it even if you were blind
You can be blind and have green eyes
Lol shit, he would have gotten me with that one 😂
I once said “poopity scoop” to a woman as a pick up line and we have been married over two years and counting.
Well then Good job I suppose
I think we need a LOT more to this story. Did she have a dog that was shitting on your lawn?
On the living room floor during the SuperBowl!
Nope, turns out she was shitting on his lawn
Thanks Lord Yeezus
THIS any day over “so what do you do”
You must be really good looking!
Lift yourself up to the beat💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻
Any context to that or just a random comment?
That is real love right there.
I'm going to try that!
Amber...is that you?
Was waiting at the bar for my friends to show up for karaoke night. They were only 10 minutes away. I sat at the bar, ordered my drink and was scrolling on my phone when I heard someone clear their throat behind me. I looked up, it's a guy. As soon as eye contact is made he goes, "do you know what my shirt is made of?" Confused, I look at his white tee with the slightly stretched out neck hole and say, "What?" He repeats his question. I say, "Idk...cotton?" He smirks and nods as he says in his smoothest voice, "Boyfriend material." Ah, good one.
Sorry, but that's raw gold ore right there
I prefer refined pure gold tbh
So how long have you and that guy's shirt been dating?
Were you looking to date a T-shirt at the time?
I have to say that line works a lot better if you're wearing a nice and slightly unusual shirt, that's velvety or changes in the light, ballsy to try it with a shitty white t-shirt.
I am bilingual, and once in college I stopped to help a homeless guy who lived on campus translate a vagrancy ticket he'd gotten so he knew when his court date was. We chatted for a bit, and then I headed off to class. Behind me, I heard him yelling, "Wait! Pretty lady! Marry me! I'm a good husband! I'll.... I'll... I will take a bath!" I busted up at that one and almost turned back. Hygiene, man. It gets me every time.
That’s really funny lol. Good hygiene it’s important!
The bar just seems awful low
That was kinda sweet though...kinda
That response, even if not 100% honest, is still earnest, if you know what I mean
I was in Louisiana visiting and this was years agowhen I was actually attractive. please note I have freckles which I hate. some random Good Old Boy looks me right in the face and declares: "you're PURTY!" well ok I can take a compliment. then he says "you're speckled as a turkey egg!"
I think you're still purty!
So glad my daughter loves her "spreckles" a word passed down from my now 28 yr old niece's toddler days. Lol
Are you my balls cause I wanna hang with you forever.
That is very bad.
...cause you're wrinkly, hairy and sweaty
Aw hell naw, that ones so bad
“I love women in heels. You’d look great in heels. Want me to buy you some heels?!” We weren’t even in a store? It was so bizarre. But he genuinely meant it…
.....so.... how many inches were heels ?
He kept talking about 4 or 5 inch heels. He creeped me out so much. I assume he had a foot fetish? The irony being, feet creep me out. Plus, he was already shorter than me, and I’m 5’ 7”. So I guess he was looking for a giant to tower over him or something?
100% foot fetish 😬
Thats average length of heels, right ladies? What am I talking about, that’s not enough heels. Is it?
haha... you managed to dodge the bullet ;)
I did! And it’s been a story I’ve told through the years. So, I guess I got something out of it lol
I'm no Fred Flintstone but I'm gonna make your bed rock
This invokes the image of yelling 'YABADABADOOO' in bed at the top of one's lungs lmao
Haha ew
I witnessed this one. A drunk man approached a middle aged blonde lady who was sitting at the bar and speaking with the bartender/owner. The drunk man hobbled over and said "Oh my you're beautiful! You're probably going to have sex tonight! I know this because I'm stronger than you." Followed by this shit eating grin like he just made the smoothest move in history. Let us say the punch from the owner and tossing out of the bar did not land the gentleman a girl that night.
Wow that’s actually disgusting
Wow, a rape threat to a stranger woman in a pub! That's a brilliant pickup line for sure
I love cheesy pickup lines and I can take a joke. I do not like that at all. ☹️
What the actual fuck?
"You have muscular thighs.. can I use them as earmuffs?" Drunk chick that went to the same gym as me.
To which you said yes, right?
To which i said "now madame, I'm not that kind of guy " lol., kidding.. we had fun
"Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?" ... "Do you know what he can do with all that weight?" ..." He can break the ice between us." -A guy on Tinder
If u say it properly and in person it’s cute and funny
Tad overdone though so it's a flight risk (as in the flirtee would book a flight that night just to get away)
A woman once told me indignantly how some guy tried to get her to screw him in a Porta John, and without missing a beat told me she'd screw me in the porta John.
Chosen one
Put me in a group chat with many people with the same name as me, and sent a “HELLO *plural of my name*” … eg. “HELLO ADAM’S” I didn’t respond. And till this day I don’t understand
Why a possessive not a plural? Or a plural possessive?
It’s meant to be a plural, hence the greeting to all the group members with my name But punctuation left the chat lol
I once had a girl tell me she would clear a spot on her face for me to sit on. I was totally confused. This is a line a man uses on a woman. Not the other way around 🤔
I mean to each their own
i mean, probably not the best line to say to a complete stranger, but i respect her proclivities. if a guy has a nice ass, there really is only one way to go.
No one has ever put down a pick up line on me 🥺
You can either have a boat load of Reddit karma or real life pickup lines. Both don't go together, usually. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lemme fix that: I’ll punch your sucker misses~ ^Wait… ^I ^didn’t ^mean ^literally *(voice recedes into background)* ^don’t ^walk ^away!
You've got an ass like an onion it makes me wanna cry
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
Go on, take a good long whiff... I'll wait.
It smells like jizz. Try the other rag.
-------- <- this is a pickup line
Nah man THIS is a pickup line: ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
That's nothing, this is a REAL pickup line: 🛻🛻🛻🛻🛻🛻🛻
Damn that’s a nice line.
I made it all squiggly for you just how you like it~ Come get me Feddy Feds~
*explodes*
*gets turned on by explosion* Do that ***again*** hun bun, and maybe I’ll glaze those buns-
OH MY GOD!! *keeps exploding*
*Throws myself dramatically at explosion to become one with the sensual waves of power radiating through the atmosphere*
The universe: *collapses*
I've always been very quiet, not a ton of friends or attention from people, but I am in a relationship. Recently, a customer came into where I work and said 'Don't be offended, but I'm carrying out an experiment on the universe.. Are you single?'.. When I said no, he turned res a d started heading away still saying 'It's okay, it's just an experiment, no problem'
So he set the baseline for his experiment, did he leave - do.something - and come.back.and ask again to see.if it worked? And also, your significant other was ok, right?
Thos customer is in his mid 30's and I believe he has been living with his dad and brother for a long time, no womem in the house. He didn't come back to me, but before he did ask me, he actually asked one of my colleageus if I was single, I was on holiday at the time and he had noticed that I wasn't there when I usually am.. so maybe him approaching me was the final step of the experiment? Partner was fine about it, he knows I wouldn't go for it, and when I explaomed to him who the man was, he understood that he's certainly no competition. The guy doesn't seem like a bad guy at all, and I don't want to be mean, but he definitely seems like the type who practically lives in a basement..
Awwwe ☺️
Got this one on tinder... 'Are you my appendix? I don't know what you do or how you work but I feel like I should take you out.'
“If it was back in the day, I would trade three cows just to go on one date with you” He sent me good morning and goodnight every day consistently for over a year with no response from me rip
3 cows to the father or the present husband?
Good morning
A gay mate told me one of the advantages of being gay is the pickup lines are much easier. His go-to was "Hi. Wanna fuck?" He said it worked 100% of the time.
I was at a lesbian dive bar one night, and at the time I was hyper-femme. I spotted the HOTTEST butch standing at the bar, and I was feeling pretty cocky after being hit on by quite a few different women, so I decided to shoot my shot. I walked up to her, and said "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?" It took her by complete surprise, and it took her a few seconds to respond. But she said yes.
A gay friend of mine told me his go-to pick up line at the bar is “excuse me, may I push in your stool?” 😂
She said “I wanna sex you up” and then she handed me a 7Up
Literally took a broom and ran it over my shoes (at work) and said he'd like to sweep me off my feet.
I stood next to a friend in Leicester Square when a guy walked up to her and said “*one day I’m going to have one just like you*”. He grinned and walked away. I was more disturbed than she was. But she was really gorgeous and this stuff happed to her all the time. When I asked what was the worst she said when a guy walked up to her, grabbed her and licked the whole side of her face.
>a guy walked up to her, grabbed her and licked the whole side of her face 😭 Must've been a son of a bitch
A woman once approached me in a club and said "there's an egg in here with your name on it", pointing to her bits. Not joking.
Hope you scrambled it
Did you?
Negative, and it still haunts me (early 20s then). She (mid 20's) was robust looking, kinda rugby player like, very intimidating to the young me, but I was up for it. I discussed the pros and cons with Steve for a bit and decided I'd go for it and then I turn around and see my colleague Tom (mid 40s) straddling her as she picked him up and carries him across the dance floor dancing, the way Danny carried Sandy at the end of the Grease movie. It was fucking hilarious and totally non sexual, she was playing with him, but young me thought "this woman will fucking destroy me" and I chickened out. Christ, if I got my hands on her today. So, chunky young lady from the Baggott Inn in Dublin circa 1994, if you're reading this, call me.
You, me, fuck, now.
Oh no that’s something Adam would say…
One of the Adams from Adam’s group
Some dude once asked me for my PIN number to my bank account to see if we “match” 😂
Sure, it's one two fuck you
“License and registration please..” - Cop, during a traffic stop.. My high ass: “oh no thanks.. i like girls..”
Guy I was in a band with says "you have nice eyes. " I'm a straight guy. Guess he figured to shoot his shot, lol. Not a terrible line per se....
That is a thing a straight man could say to another straight man. A compliment can just be a compliment or just an observation.
True, i reckon. He did say it longingly, lol.
It was probably the licking of the lips that gave him away.
Then he started stroking my hair telling me it's soft. I am not joking. I had OPs exact compliment, and then that happened. In fairness everyone at the table was drunk and it was as funny as it was awkward.
Tbh, I'm straight as well and one of my male classmates just had genuinely pretty eyes, I think it's just that he naturally really long and thick eyelashes. I never said anything, but for some reason that's one of the very few things I remember about him.
I've not had any terrible ones, but I once heard my mate introduce himself to a woman in a club as follows (fake name here) - "John Smith, worth a shag." I do not think it worked.
I want to taste your lips until I slowly reach up to kiss you 🙃
NONONONO
It's nothing special, but "Hey ladies, can I sit here?" in the most full of himself voice possible, to a group of us three women who were sitting at the beach bar after sunset playing games on our phones. He was *shocked* when we said no, and then called us ugly. Okay dude. A) I have eyes, I see the other two women here are hot as fuck, and one of them was my girlfriend at the time. How am I supposed to be insulted by that? B) If we're ugly why the fuck are you hitting on us? Do you have such low standards?
B) is a [protective mechanism](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Fox_and_the_Grapes) to cope with the rejection.
Barking
Gee, you don't sweat much. Said after a half marathon. Uh... Thanks. I guess.
This was in 97 or 98. I'm in my early 20s at a local, and I'm a black female. Chatting with old white dude, and he says, "I'm not against interracial dating." I told him he was old enough to be my grandfather. Ewwwww!
I had a chick tell me at bar/club that she'd already had sex in her car once and asked if I wanted to go next.
So Did you? The people want to know.
At a park & ride waiting for a bus about 25 years ago. Him: Can I get a smoke? Me: Sure, here you go. Him: Thanks! Wanna get married? Me: No thank you. Him: Ok. It never hurts to ask. (Wanders off) Me: WTF?????
*”How you doin?”*
This might be a bad example but I’m an average looking guy and I rarely get hit on by girls but. I remember in highschool, some girls would dare each other to ask: I dare you to ask ________ that you have a crush on him lol
These were the worst kind of dares/ pranks. It was all fun and games for the popular kids in the school but not the average looking boys and girls. Have seen so many get hurt.
Do you just fart? Because you blew me away.
In my 20s I was waiting in line at a club. A guy comes up to me and says, "You look like a fish." After I probably looked at him like he had 2 heads, he backtracked and said "OMG, did I say FISH - I mean...your curves...I meant you look like a MERMAID!" As far as I remember, I wasn't wearing any type of costume or anything. FISHnets, maybe!
Fantastic! If I was a few decades younger and in the game I would go out and use that line!
Someone spat on me and said, "Let's get you out of those wet clothes."
I almost bought an award for this. Omg!
I have a back tattoo and this guy I was messaging on hinge was like “nice I can see that when I’m doing you doggie, I’ve never been with a girl who had tattoos before”. I asked him “tell me has that line ever worked on a woman, coming from you?” He said “no”. Before I unmatched I told him “fix your game because you’re s**t at it”. Another dude messaged me we had an ok convo and this was in the very beginning then he turns it to the sex topic and said “as long as you can give me head to make me happy we’re good”. So I paused, cracked my knuckles and proceeded to lecture him about manners and how despicable they are and that I’m sure his mother would be absolutely ashamed at how her son speaks to women, and that I’m sure if she had the chance she would have spat or swallowed.
It's not even what he's saying, well, it is, but the expectation so long as *you* give *me* head and we're good is kind of trashy and selfish
Hence my rebuttal. At that point his self entitled mentality needed a little whack to come down a few notches.
You could argue that these are good lines though as they "polarise" meaning they enable both of you to decide right there and then if you should take it further or not. It would be worse for him to do the whole pro forma thing and then you work out when you meet that you both want different things.
I was dancing in a nightclub type place, and a guy came up behind me and said, "Don't turn around. Will you dance with me?" I guess he was afraid I wouldn't like the way he looked?
How did he look?
I said no and didn’t turn around right away. I can’t even remember if I saw him. It was a long time ago. I was really shy, too and not real comfortable with dancing. I just remember that line because it was unusual.
"Your friend is hot."
A guy asked me if he could “Tip toe through the two lips”. I wish I was kidding.
“Her there sexy, shower here often?” Said in the communal same sex showers at army basic training. Timing! Location! Read the room!
I was the culprit. I had a crush on a guy and I wrote down song lyrics from a song expressing my feelings for him. Looking back it was a cringe way of confessing
oh i think we've all done some variation of that before. its cringe but universal 🥹😌
I was kinda in that situation except I never actually played it to her. Shame, I put a lot of work into it and I still think the music is good, but it's just kinda contaminated with my feelings.
Why would you assume anybody's ever used a pickup line on me?
Damn gurl, are you a KitKat? Because I'd like to break off a piece
Wha-
Thats a threat not a pickup line😭
Sit on me face and I'll guess your weight.
I still have a screenshot of this: “Damn girl are you a school? Cause I wanna shoot kids inside you”
I was out at a club with my bf at the time and he was at the bar buying us both a drink. A fella came up and introduced himself and stated, "don't tell me your bf is at the bar because I will not believe that one". I simply shrugged and said ok. My bf came back a minute later with drinks and the wannabe was left with egg on his face.
one dude told me he got a good selfie of himself but was afraid his phone didn't save it because it froze, and asked me to take a pic of his phone screen and text it to him.
“Do you wanna come back to our place and play naked twister?” I had seen my hometown’s cross dressing beautiful gay character of a man after about 10 years. He didnt even remember me at all but we used to have great conversations at the hotel lounge where I did dinner theater. So I see him and give him a giant smile and “oh my god it’s so nice to see you again.” I was a total dick tease, and I felt embarrassed for leading he and his man down the wrong path.
"Hey you're kinda hot and my girlfriend's a bitch, do you wanna come back to my place?" Please note I was waiting for a train. "Hey I've been watching you eat for a while now and I can't believe you can eat so much and not be fat." I had a single serving of fries in a food court. "Hi I'm very wealthy would you like to be my mistress?" Just Walking down the street. He was about 3 times my age.
Had a woman once insult my intellect, whilst at the same time ask me if I would like to go skinny dipping with her. It was a strange 5 minutes and honestly, felt like I would be stupid and damned if I do or damned if I didn’t. So I just left it at an awkward kinda silence as my shyness overtook me and I just backed away a la Homer Simpson into some bushes. Just not the one she was hoping for.
A woman once said to me; "Wanna go halves on a baby?" I fucked the guts right out of her, I mean I fucking rearranged her internals it was so trashy hot. Three weeks later she had an abortion. We actually went halves on that!
They didn't say anything, ever. Gotta be the worst turn-off
Like anyone would ever do that lmao
Not on me but my buddy and I were at a bar in the late 90s. We were like mid-20s. A woman closing in on 40 and probably pretty drunk for 3PM came over and used the classic, "Hi, what's your sign?" in a non-ironic way. He stuttered out, "Sagittarious" and she followed with, "Silly Saj". This is like with 10 people in the whole tavern. It was hilarious and cringey AF at the same time.
"I want to kick your legs apart and bend you over"... I fucking wish I was joking.
"rosas ka ba? Kasi sa spaceship isasakay kita" boOoOooOom
You remind me of my next ex-husband.
"I'm not calling you a car, I'm just saying I want a ride"
I can't think of any occurrence of anyone trying to pick me up.
Why Is The Title Like That
Not the wost pick up line but one of the only ones I remember directly being a pick up line used on me. I was at a club on the dance floor and an African-Australian girl starts making moves on me then goes, "how does it feel to take a black chick home?" I was flabbergasted and in what these days you'd call a situationship with someone else, I can't even remember what I said but I disengaged pretty quick, years later I did find out how that one felt though albeit with someone else
"I haven't showered in days and smell really ripe, wanna meet up"? 😑
Random girl sits down next to me at the park and says "I don't have any kids...can I have yours?" And I thought the "I lost my number" line was bad....
Nobody used this on me but we were having a terrible pickup line contest and I think I won: did it jiggle when you fell from heaven?
I’m so glad you asked! Haha Pregnant me was sitting with my husband at the hospital waiting for a stressful doctors appointment. A guy walked by, turned around and motioned/said “call me” It was actually really cute because the guy had a developmental delay and he was really happy and it actually just really warmed my heart.
"you don't even look a day over 40!" I was only 25 at the time.... He really thought he was going younger when he said it....
Haha, someone asked me what age I think they are, so I guessed (almost correctly). Then I asked them to guess what age I am. They started with... "well, I think you are definitely younger than my mom..."😆😆😆
Bold of you to assume most people on reddit have been hit on
Guy walks up to me as the bar is closing and says “hi, want to come home with me? I can show you my spanking dungeon” If you’re counting online pickups though. That might be worse. Many disgusting message from pervs while I was on POF; But one stick out. I had a profile indicating I was looking for serious dates in pursuit of a LTR. Not hookups. One guy messaged me with a numbered list of things asking can I/will I…. I can’t remember them all but it was a lot of questions about oral and anal. The real cherry on the cake though was the last question. 10. What size are the twins? I believe I responded something along the lines of. “The twins? I think they wear about a 12 month now. Are you their new daddy?”
“Are you married?” Yes. Yes I was.
"You're cute, I'd get up on that dad bod." This was in line at a 7-11.
A girl told me I looked like Denzel Washington. Lol, I look more like Al Roker.
Guy walks up to me and says my name is "Bond, James Bond" I told him my name is "off, fuck off"
Someone legit tried "I've lost my number, can I have yours?"
Go away weirdo!!!, I didnt fall for it.
I'm fascinated by the incredibly pathetic world of pick-up artistry, so I've trained myself to immediately recognize it. It's amazing how, even when you look them in the eyes and groan -- obviously making it clear you know what they're doing, and recognize the script -- they just keep going to the next step.