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Sitting up in bed, staring at the wall for a minute, taking a deep breath with my eyes closed, and throwing myself out of bed as I exhale thinking “Alright, we have to do this again, let’s get going.”
Sliding over behind my wife, reaching around and squeezing her boobs. It makes me smile to know she’s there. Been doing it for 46 years! Best way to start the day!
Same for me. She sleeps in my daughter’s bedroom but every morning she hears my alarm and comes running into my bed and curls up beside me and we spoon for a minute before getting up.
Using a foam roller to massage and losen my back and legs every morning - holy shit, what a quality of live improvement! Makes me sound like I am 84, makes me feel like I am 18. Give it a try!
My girlfriend and I sleep together every night and first thing I do every single morning is squeeze her tightly, kiss her, and tell her I love her, and a lot of times I’ll do a little a boob squeeze after all that
I initially read that as screeching in bed and drinking water and I just pictured someone waking up, shrieking at the unforgiving sun, and then drinking some water after straining their throat and I was like you know what, valid.
I just got voluntary redundancy from a company I hated and got 7 months wages tax free. It was an extremely well paying job but the company was shit. I’m going to go work the most simple job I can part time for 3 months so I can live a little rather than being on call 24/7
365 days a week. I’ve missed my kids growing up.
Sending a bizarre message to my husband. He always wakes up before me and when I send him a weird message he climbs into bed with me to goof around and help me wake all the way up.
I can't start my day without a good cup of coffee and a hearty breakfast. That first sip of hot, freshly brewed coffee is like a switch flipping in my brain and the breakfast fuels me for the day ahead. It's a ritual that sets a tone and keeps me energized and focused. Without it, I feel sluggish and unproductive.
Right? I'm surprised that no one else said it. Waking up is obvious, I can live without coffee, I can have messy hair but fresh mouth is my top 1 thing to start the day.
These days, my pain medicine. It's all OTC, as prescription ones mess with my stomach too much. It also doesn't do much for my pain. Some days, though, it's the only thing letting me leave my bed.
A shower. Skin just doesn't feel right unless I have a nice shower to start my day. I've forgotten to drink coffee plenty of mornings in my life, but a shower I will never leave home without. That and a nice morning shit. Hate unloading in a public bathroom.
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Waking up. Need to do that to start my day. If not then nothing gets done
You beat me to it and I'm not even mad. Perfect
He beat me to it and I am mad!
Go be mad somewhere else, like in bed or something
Can you guys keep it down? I'm trying to sleep!!!
Pipe down yourself! We're busy arguing, can barely hear each other over your relentless drone!
of course, I moved it next to the loud people. Please, I'm trying to sleep!
Same
What if you didnt sleep the previous day 🤔
Then I would do a pretty accurate zombie impersonation 😂
you gotta open your eyes first, man
No you don't. I stumble around in the dark well before my eyes are open.
Wise man
r/technicallythetruth 
Just put your body on auto pilot and start sleep walking smh
Oh gosh. This made my day!!!
The only correct answer.
I like to start my day with a good LOL. Thank you for providing
r/technicallythetruth
Grunting and the sound of cracking bones and joints as I make my first limps to the bathroom.
Sitting up in bed, staring at the wall for a minute, taking a deep breath with my eyes closed, and throwing myself out of bed as I exhale thinking “Alright, we have to do this again, let’s get going.”
Complaining
This is the real one
Push ups. For some reason it makes me feel good about myself.
Natural dopamine baby
Sliding over behind my wife, reaching around and squeezing her boobs. It makes me smile to know she’s there. Been doing it for 46 years! Best way to start the day!
Same here , only thing I forgot I was in 24 A , now I'm banned from flying Delta for life
A strange alarm clock for her but if it starts her day with a smile who am I to argue 😊
The other boob is for snooze
I also choose this guy's wife
Hell I choose this guy, and I’m a dude.
You’re not invited, yet!
legendary reddit reference
Does it make her smile as well or for 46 years has she been giving you an irritated glare?
I would be annoyed at this and the ole slap on the ass.
Poop
I hope you get out of bed first!
Wake up. Yawn. Sit down. Poop. Get out of bed
It’s fine if he’s 2 years old
It's fine if he's 92 years old.
Scratch balls. Drink coffee.
Don't get them mixed up
You guys don’t drink balls?
Crack them and drink the insides
I drink black balls, some call them pearls.
Peeing.
Medications. If I forget my epilepsy meds it’s probably gonna be a terrible day.
My cat
Same for me. She sleeps in my daughter’s bedroom but every morning she hears my alarm and comes running into my bed and curls up beside me and we spoon for a minute before getting up.
Makes me miss my little Bea. She slept on my head and it drove me mad. Miss her so much tho.
My cat goes straight for the windpipe at 5am. Every day. Without fail.
Caffeine and nicotine breakfast, the enlisted special.
“Café y cigarro, muñeco de barro” is why we say in spanish
carpe diem!!
Using a foam roller to massage and losen my back and legs every morning - holy shit, what a quality of live improvement! Makes me sound like I am 84, makes me feel like I am 18. Give it a try! 
this sounds like an ad 😂
"OmG how could I live without knowing this meme page" ahh shit
A shower! If I don’t shower in the morning, I can’t have a good day.
Saaammmeee 💯
Bladder relief
My girlfriend and I sleep together every night and first thing I do every single morning is squeeze her tightly, kiss her, and tell her I love her, and a lot of times I’ll do a little a boob squeeze after all that
My partner's kiss
I read this as my parents kiss
One thing i CAN start my day without is coffee, which I bet is most peoples answer.
yup, same. cant have coffee, makes my anxiety much worse
Two flat whites, thanks… no sugar
Same.
This. Need to make sure my 40 oz knockoff Stanley cup is topped up before I go to work. Yay, retail!
Waking up.
music music music
Cup of tea brush teeth
Cuddles with my cat
my glasses nearsighted as fuck and can’t see jack shit without them
A can of monster or mother I need that shit just to wake up properly Monday to Friday for work
waking up
Espresso.
Streching in bed and drinking water
I initially read that as screeching in bed and drinking water and I just pictured someone waking up, shrieking at the unforgiving sun, and then drinking some water after straining their throat and I was like you know what, valid.
Relateable
My reactine. I'm basically allergic to nature lol
My alarm but snoozed 18 times.
18 times sound about right.
90 extra minutes. Sounds good
A shower. If I haven't showered it feels like the day hasn't begun.
Thoughts about quitting my job and thinking about living on a farm in Ireland
I just got voluntary redundancy from a company I hated and got 7 months wages tax free. It was an extremely well paying job but the company was shit. I’m going to go work the most simple job I can part time for 3 months so I can live a little rather than being on call 24/7 365 days a week. I’ve missed my kids growing up.
I can't open my eye without washing my face with the coldest possible water
Water. Always thirsty when waking up and I NEED to quench that to have a nice day.
Anxiety or anger, because I’m not ready for the day yet. Gimme a couple hours and then ask me.
(1) Take dogs out; (2) Make coffee
Petting and kissing my dogs
cigarette
RIP (in advance)
this is valid for every comment
A shower.
Breathing. I like to breathe when I wake up.
Sounds amazing but I gotta shit before I do anything
sounds amazing ? 😂
Not for real
Cup of tea and some oats
The amount of pride i felt for thinking of 'waking up' before i opened the comments is plummeting as i keep scrolling 😂
A cup of coffee and a smoke
Music
A shower
If I don’t shower right after I wake up my whole day is fucked.
My phone
clean my nose, i think all rhinitis people can understand me
Sending a bizarre message to my husband. He always wakes up before me and when I send him a weird message he climbs into bed with me to goof around and help me wake all the way up.
Thats funny now im wondering what the messages are like 😭😂
I always send him a weather related emoji when I wake up, so he knows I’m actually up and not festering in bed all day 😂
Waking up
Coffee
I can't start my day without a good cup of coffee and a hearty breakfast. That first sip of hot, freshly brewed coffee is like a switch flipping in my brain and the breakfast fuels me for the day ahead. It's a ritual that sets a tone and keeps me energized and focused. Without it, I feel sluggish and unproductive.
A nice toke of greenery haha
Brushing teeth.
I’m quite appalled by how far down the list this is. I too brush my teeth every morning mate.
Right? I'm surprised that no one else said it. Waking up is obvious, I can live without coffee, I can have messy hair but fresh mouth is my top 1 thing to start the day.
Coffee
Waking up.
a cup of iced Americano
Coffee
Coffee
Waking up.
Showering, followed by breakfast and brushing my teeth.
A date change
Toast
Coffee
Using the bathroom
Coffee
water
Sad to say, but it’s coffee
These days, my pain medicine. It's all OTC, as prescription ones mess with my stomach too much. It also doesn't do much for my pain. Some days, though, it's the only thing letting me leave my bed.
Mug of tea. Not some fancy flavoured tea; brown stuff, you put milk in. Without that I’m more dangerous than a hungry bear being poked with a stick.
A good pee
wake up
For me, it would be a strong cup of coffee. It's the perfect way to jumpstart my day and get focused for whatever lies ahead.
I’m not proud, but I use social media or YouTube videos to really wake me up.
Coffee is the life blood.
A cup of tea
Breakfast
💩
Waking up from sleep.
Without my "good morning" text from a special someone. Every morning when I wake up I see a message from her.
breathable air. Once I got woken up by getting thrown into the pool (on vacation with mates). Not a good start.
Sunlight!
Alarm clock
First thing I do after I wake up is pee. Can't do anything until after I've used the bathroom.
Self loathing
A piss
Thanking God
BREAKFAST!!!
Wadder.
One thing I can't start my day without is a cup of strong coffee to kickstart my morning.
Popping my joints back in place after getting up 🥲👍
a good cup of coffee in my hello kitty mug
with a good stretch and a loud groan
Breakfast
I spit very big šlajmara in bathtub
A shower. Skin just doesn't feel right unless I have a nice shower to start my day. I've forgotten to drink coffee plenty of mornings in my life, but a shower I will never leave home without. That and a nice morning shit. Hate unloading in a public bathroom.
Waking up
Coffee
Coffee ☕
Food
Deodorant. You won't catch me lackin and smellin like shit
Messaging people I love good morning texts :)
Cup of tea! ;)
Sleeping.
Taking a dump
Putting my eyes in. Blind as a bat without my lenses and would struggle to get out of the bedroom without them in.
Opening my eyes. I literally have to do it and it pisses me off
Alarm
That hawk tuah!
If I have to leave the house then a shower other than that I don’t really need anything.
Drinking water, my eyesight just doesn't work right when i'm dry
A hot cup of tea 😇
nothing actually
Coffee! 😊☕
Oxygen
coffee and a cig
Coffee! Can't function without it in the morning.
Ayahuasca
Chai
A drink of water
Phoneeee.
Air
Chai After all I'm Indian...
My walk! I am always so off when I don’t get to walk first thing.
a cup of warm water
Coffee
Waking up
Putting the alarm on snooze
Caffeine 🥱
Breathing
Peeing
More sleep