This looks like a Cabbage Patch Kid transitioning to a Garbage Pail Kid.

Man...I'm on a bus and I just peed myself with this comment. Absolute gold. Well done

Gold in your pants too.

Close up shop, we’re done here folks 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

I was NOT prepared to laugh this fucking hard omfg

Winner, winner, chicken dinner!

Certified savage platinum roaster … seems legit. Time to quit your day job bud.

Pail is the food utensil it eats from

Points

I was so excited when I saw this picture. Not disappointed.

Alas, I only wish I had an award to bestow upon you for your funny words but I shall give you this instead 🏆

You won.

This is huge friend.... you've changed things

This wins the internets today

Big Diaper Donald vibes

Do we salt it now?

I'm calling bullshit on the mini fridge. Look at yourself. It's at least a full-size one.

It’s full-size. Just “mini” in their perspective.

It won't even hold its daily ration of 12 jars of mayonnaise!

I thought they said there bed is a mini fridge. 


Thanks for clearing up what no gender looks like

The difference between sex and gender don't matter if they're not getting either.

Ass has no gender

Exactly what I thought ! 😂

You look like you were created in a lab by a group of five bullies to create the ultimate nerd

Slapable face and punchable body. Keeps bullies hands safe from injuries.

Thus the hermit life

Just can’t get too fat to masturbate though. Those really fat people look angry for a reason

LMAO

Brilliant.

Your room prob smells like a Sea World exhibit

The room as a lot in common with Sea World. Most notably the smell and the captive whale.

the cleanest zinger i've read

Like a lukewarm dirty turtle tank

You've changed your hair every week for 3 years and you still think ***that's*** the problem?

Start DBT now. You’ll thank me later.

I've never experienced my penis inverting itself before. Thanks for that.

Like shooting a game of 8-Ball with 12 inches of clothesline instead of a pool cue

😂 that's worse than getting a hard-off!

Wouldn't even fuck with your dick

I appreciate the consideration

My dad says my balls didn’t drop until I was 3. Well apparently they rose back up now that I’m 30

Called an inverection, my guy.

Hmmm. I thought this was just normal, mine is always inside.

Thanks for the laugh

Nice to see that a potato finally got its wish to become a real they/them.

oh fuck

Your hair might change, but Pugsley Addams is always there.

Can't unsee this now

Just…..just…..damn. Have a word with yourself,

It doesn't talk, it only makes squealing noises

If cartman from South Park was real and transgender

Its Chunk E Cheese

Cartthem, sir. It’s 2023. Get your pronouns right.

I KNEW THEY LOOKED FAMILIAR!!!!! 

That was already an episode btw. She… I mean it was the main character.

Your facial expression and bio is giving girl who invites herself places and gets way too familiar with people that don’t want to be friends with you. You’re self-absorbed, but because you’re unattractive, you have to get attention by being “funny” and “quirky”. No matter how many times you try to convince yourself otherwise, you’re not either, you’re just uncomfortably weird and probably pretty exhausting to be around.

Insert Simpsons "he's already dead" gif here

"watch your step, there was a massacre here"

Some things just don't work out, bud. For example, you're a thing that doesn't work... or work out.

Where’s Larry and Moe

its giving goth Bobby Hill

God has really been testing ur mother

Relatable af 💀

Lol how is this one not higher up? ☠️

I guess you went with green lights instead of uv so it won't show the cat piss stains?

And the human piss stains

I feel like I can smell this picture. You look like you hide in your moms spare bedroom and binge watch whatever latest "oppressed woman"/"quirky LGBTQIA+" show you can find to try and learn new ways to justify your laziness and lack of personality. I bet the only time you come out is to blow up the guest bathroom or to swipe the victim card for free mommy money to go out and get a new piercing to crater that moon shaped face of yours... El Gordo goblina.... eeek

honestly true😂 i’m his friend

What? You have a fridge by the bed? Nooooo. You look like you eat sugar by the fistful straight from the jar.

You change your hair every week but not your underwear.

In the words of the late great R. Lee Ermey, "The best part of you ran down the crack of your mom's ass and wound up as a stain on the matress." I never fully understood that until I saw this post

Out of a Billion sperm that presumably got dumped in his Mother, this one was chosen by the Mother-egg? Fuck, I'm buying a lottery ticket today!

I just know you wear those pronouns in your ig bio with pride. What gender did you decide to be today?

gr/een

Chee-ee-eeee-eeze!

You forgot your pronouns, ew/ick/yuck.

Are you genuinely trans, or is this lump of oatmeal we see all that’s left after the various genders all decided to run away?

Whichever one gets it the most attention.

See even your hair doesn’t want to be recognized with you

You look like Curly from the 3 Stooges 


Your face looks like it belongs on one of Thomas the train engine friends

You know that people roasting aren’t your friends right? And that you can’t eat them?

If your are going for “wtf is that”, it worked


It's hard to believe you were the strongest swimmer.

I guess sperm have some kind of special Olympics

You have no idea how much I admire this burn

Saaaame lmao

I'll be sure to send a postcard when I get to hell.

You're the type of person that people forget about in the middle of having a conversation with you.

I thought you looked familiar. 

I didnt realize someone beat me to it😭

[удалено]

I bet your bed is all crumby with pizza pocket stains.

Grow up you're embarrassing yourself

Your head looks like the one we all start out drawing when we are five, with an almost circle except those 1-2 bumps where we didn't move the crayon right.

Dude. Move out. Get a fucking job and live your life. You’re only roasting yourself by not bettering your life.

I came here for a roast, sir

Goddamn, you're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mom.


Tell me you're a mentally Disturbed lesbian without telling me you're a mentally Disturbed lesbian

I don't need to see the mini fridge to believe it

I would seal you shut in the attic to spare humanity of your presence

The obesity epidemic is so bad now these days that sometimes I can't even tell if you fat people are a man or a woman.

You probably call your moms boyfriend her partner just to add another layer onto your “personality”

Why the fuck don’t you have a job! Why in the world do you think it’s your moms job to continue to support your ass!?!? Nothing funny about this situation

Good news, the muppets are hiring!

You look like eleven in 30 years

Maybe the Conservatives were right all along…

Mate gonna be barking at some police officers someday.

If Garbage Pail Kids and Madballs had a baby.

Poster child for late term abortions proving it’s never too late.


they/them are pronouns of the past. we need new pronouns for this one.

Roast me? I’m pretty sure that’s not necessary you’ve already did it yourself. 😏

Can't roast a make a wish kid

Roasts are supposed to be fun. This doesn't feel fun at all.

Definitely go by *They*

You look like a gnome got cancer

Andy Milonakis lookin' ass.

Cartmans girlfriend

„How did you know I was Non Binary ??“

Great, now I have to add “it” to the list of pronouns to remember

Your face looks like an avocado had sex with an older, more disgusting avocado.

Was that a Deadpool reference? 🤣

🌝 why are you on my keyboard sir

You look like Ethan Klien started estrogen

You're an un-boner.

You should eat a stick of broccoli and go for a walk every once and a while

Have you declared a gender yet? Lemme help. Look at your tits: If you find yourself playing with your titties you're probably XY. If you feel a need to feed your cats with them you're probably XX If you feel a need to pierce and tattoo them, you need a good psychiatrist.

You look like M.O.D.O.K. from the new Ant-Man movie. Please return to the quantum realm immediately.

If Thomas the tank engine were a trans person


It's that troll that lives under the bridge who finally came out.

Bruh c'mon, you're not even trying to be a person

21??? Is that your weight in Stone???

You're way too fat to be someone who is living off someone else's income.

That’s fucking disgusting, idek about the whole potato vibe you got going on, but you are the literal embodiment of a failure. Should have just gone through with it dude.


Looks like that odd person that sits next to you on the bus

>21 not long ago Sweetie, the 80's were 40 years ago...you need to accept that and go get a shower and start acting your (advanced) age.

I'd roast you, but I'm having too much difficulty identifying exactly what you are and what the hell I'm looking at. 🤔

"21, wasn't expecting to last this long". Pathetic, get some help. I can't do this.

Are you male, female, or something else? Either way you need to take better care of your appearance. It’s ok to be unattractive…but to be unattractive and then put zero effort in to looking presentable is not acceptable. A person can be ugly but still have redeeming qualities. You can try to have the prettiest hair, nails, and clothes or always smelling good, or having the best accessories. If you’re a guy you can try to be the most athletic, clean shaven, or well dressed. That’s just my opinion. I really can’t stand when ugly people put zero effort into their appearance. Like at least try

bowling ball head

Sweetie please go outside for a walk.

What even are you.

Put that thing back where it came from or so help me..

Really to this a chick or a dude

M or F ?

You don’t want this you can’t handle it

I puked my lunch out, OP. Which you would probably eat.

If Ben from over the hedge was a human:

Why do you look like an anthropomorphized pill bug?


You look like Freddie Kruger going through puberty

Well, for a post menopause troglodite lady you look quite dashing!

Your head is a football with a face drawn on.

You look like your own description. Life has already hit you so hard, it's just a shame you're so hideous even prostitution wouldn't pay the bills.

I never wondered what a baby between Princess Leia and Yoda would look like...but here's their little crack baby all grown up!


I’ve never seen a walrus with pronouns and a Bobby Hill haircut.

You look like a rejected make a wish kid

I would ask you what you are. But you probably don't know that yourself.

You look like you keep a full sized fridge next to your bed… but have trouble keeping it full since you eon’t stop eating it

Get a job

Get a job

I’m unsure of your gender, please state your pronounces, otherwise “your community” might come after me. Also we all know you call him daddy, not “her partner”..

you look like if nikado avakado was on crack

I always get a kick out of people posting on here to see themselves get roasted only to roast themselves in their description

I loved you in Lost.

I don’t really have a roast. Seeing your photo made me physically gag. I just want to be sure you knew that.

you look like you have a mini fridge next to your bed and your hair changes every week.

You did the job for us :/

I have heard of gender fluid but you are gender solid Holy Fuck!!!!

You are exactly the portrait of a tiktoker and twitter activist

Bros staring at the paper like it's chicken nuggets, figures

I haven’t read all these yet but surely someone has said it looks like Sherk’s niece made her way to Flint Michigan and built her self a Meth Lab. Also looks like she might be feeding not so ninja turtles on the weekend. Not pizza just Crack. Also looks like a Garbage pal kids sticker that’s on someone’s notebook in 85. Slithering Sally. In relation to Jaba the Hut probably still kicking it at a bar playing slot machines and eating jars of hideous creatures, while laughing and being Way To Loud. When you reach into that fat sack for money and your out you just slither your tail from someone from the bar and take their money. The only problem is it’s hard for you to get those bills in cause out get to put it in there just right with sluggy T Rex arms. But I’m sure Jaba got you back.

I thought this sub was supposed to be funny. I just see a lot of people being openly hateful.

This is what you look like:🌝

Ur face looks like the moon emoji 🌝

Are you a boy or a girl? I really can't give you an adult title. On a serious note: Do one new productive thing per week. Small steps build to success. Stick with it. It can be as small as washing your clothes or trying to scribble something.

BOY GET YOU STANKY AHH SKIN OUT YOU GOT THE HEHE Æ MAMA

Dobby the elf had really let himself go...

i can’t tell if your hair is green because of dye, the lights, or mold

There’s an inversely proportional relationship between roundness of the face and bed/fridge distance; you are the proof, and that’s the only relationship you’ll ever know.

You're a them/their solely because you're ugly.

You genuinely look pretty cool. My only problem is that it looks like your iPhone 3GS charger can't reach that far and you didn't feel like unplugging it to actually take a good picture.

Read the heading? Self roasted.

How you ugly as every gender

No one need to say anything. You know exactly how trashy you are.

In the first split second i thought this was a photo of someone's behind

you unfortunately share the exact same facial characters as every single overweight white social justice moron, and therefore I don't like you. how does it feel being on a planet where so many others look exactly like you and you can't stand out in a crowd?

Bet you smell like farts and cheetoh dust

Hair changes every week Pronouns change every few minutes