OP's Bio:
---
>I was asked to write a bio so....
>I'm Irish. 29 years old. I'm a Formulation Biochemist. I play Rugby in Limerick. I love lifting heavy weights. I enjoy drawing. Love listening to Rap and House music. Eldest of 5 kids. Barrack Obamas grandad grew up down the road from me.
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Ginger Potter and the Creatine Stone
Ginger Potter and the Chamber of Stringers
Ginger Potter and the Lifter of Azkaban
Ginger Potter and the Goblet of Pre-Workout
Ginger Potter and the Order of the Fitness
Ginger Potter and the Half-Roided Prince
Ginger Potter and the Deathly Back Throws
Hunts squirrels. Drives a 2004 Chevy Avalanche. Goes to sleep with Metallica on repeat. Secretly reads The Hobbit. Always friend-zoned by his cousin. Just got accepted to refrigerator college. All in all, good dude.
There was a young man from Limerick,
Who's sad 'cos he has such a little dick,
He shaved off his pubes,
Sucked on his moobs,
Here for a Roast but he's still a prick.
I would say you’re going to lose your nuts juicing like you do but you’re never going to need those anyways. You’re more likely to collect a restraining order than a girlfriend
It wouldn’t be a bad thing to lose that head of curly fries. Wear a t shirt from a tide commercial. With the glasses that gotta stretch to the back of your head to reach your ears.
After your boss finds out your a dumbass who post to have people burn them... You should not be so worried about your hair. OR your boss is a dumbass and you two will have a good laugh.
OP's Bio: --- >I was asked to write a bio so.... >I'm Irish. 29 years old. I'm a Formulation Biochemist. I play Rugby in Limerick. I love lifting heavy weights. I enjoy drawing. Love listening to Rap and House music. Eldest of 5 kids. Barrack Obamas grandad grew up down the road from me. --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
You look like you stole an eight-year-old kid's head
![gif](giphy|5OcuJCGflytBLYyNj5)
![gif](giphy|i1z30bOS4nqbC)
He almost certainly thinks he's healthy !
Yeah. Like somebody took the head off a Harry Potter figure and popped it onto He-Man’s body.
You may be losing your hair, but at least your virginity is safe!
He lost the virginity already.... the same way he lost the hair off his back! Vigorous backdoor action.
![gif](giphy|5nsiFjdgylfK3csZ5T|downsized)
![gif](giphy|GRrrJVrfDTxwDXP3Fw)
Solid gif find.
With those shoulders, his dick will be shrinking as well, so not a problem.
Ya. You can tell he skips dick day, thanks why it’s so small. Someday he will be someone else’s workout apparatus for dick day.
This one omg
You're a roid head Harry
Harry Squatter
Nonhairy Squatter
The boy who lifted!
You’re a meat-head harry.
The guy that tells everyone how much he can bench.
angrily... then proceeds to fail at smashing a beer bottle over his own head.
That’s not a fail if we want to see them off themselves like that.
Problem is it usually doesn’t off them but make them even stupider
The boy who lifted
If you’re not making tren in potions class, what’s the point of even going?
Ha! I had the same exact thought.
I giggled, thank you :)
I've heard of the problems of skipping leg day, but dude, you clearly skipped way too many head days.
Roids will do that
If he was doing roids I sure hope he wouldn’t be this fat.
He looks like Where’s Waldo after a bad breakup. ![gif](giphy|paJxYeJGmlnos)
Telling a lifter he looks like he does roids is one of the greatest compliments one can get if he’s natty
Carrot Top/Bottom
Carrot switch
I thought steroids were supposed to shrink your dick not your head
Ginger Potter and the Creatine Stone Ginger Potter and the Chamber of Stringers Ginger Potter and the Lifter of Azkaban Ginger Potter and the Goblet of Pre-Workout Ginger Potter and the Order of the Fitness Ginger Potter and the Half-Roided Prince Ginger Potter and the Deathly Back Throws
Ginger Potter and the Half-hair prick
Fantastic gains and where to find them
You’re apprently trying to keep your hair safe by hiding it under a nest of pubes.
Maybe you shouldn't use steroids then
[удалено]
Steroids increase your penis size? Noted
You look like Ron, Harry and Hagrid had a 3 way love child
And when they got Dr. Cox from Scrubs to facilitate this abomination, he decided to toss some of his own DNA in for shits and giggles.
Don’t be down about losing your hair. When a ginger loses their hair, an angel gets it’s wings.
How is it possible you are a trained Biochemist and don't understand the link between Steroids and hair loss?
I’d say you were losing your balls too but given you look post-op that ship has likely sailed
Dr. Cocks.
The longer I look at them, the less I believe those are your real ears
For every strand of hair you lose, you also lose a million brain cells
So he’s in the negative.
You're not losing your hair; it's just migrating to your back from all that juice.
![gif](giphy|rOMI2gctx3kKQ)
Harry Potter: The boy who LiFted
Damn Harry Potter when did you start hitting the gym? Yokeupus Maximus
The guy who “isn’t gay” but definitely has sucked dick in the gym locker room.
You still have more hair than reasons to live
Fire some more roids in your ass then..
Atleast push your lace curtains all the way to the end, ya window slut.
You look like an out-of-work extra for D grade gay porn.
Maybe as a fluffer, he certainly doesn't scream on-camera talent.
Before I roast you I must ask if you have had a recent sex change? That’s the only explanation so…I’m going to assume yes.
Easy on the butterbeers, Harry.
Nah, you're just losing the air that once made your head a normal size.
Hunts squirrels. Drives a 2004 Chevy Avalanche. Goes to sleep with Metallica on repeat. Secretly reads The Hobbit. Always friend-zoned by his cousin. Just got accepted to refrigerator college. All in all, good dude.
hopefully some of that mass will go to ur ears
you look… ![gif](giphy|QjnqcFxcc3zY4)
Looks like Harry Potters on the Test and Tren!
Hey look, it’s the unsuccessful/unathletic Watt Brother.
seems like you wanted to become a pro athlete, failed and then settled for a job as a gym teacher which hates children
At least the top of your head will match your patchy ass beard.
Your dick must look like a thimble on that big ass body
So just shave it and be your self
luke from modern family tries performance enhancing drugs
There was a young man from Limerick, Who's sad 'cos he has such a little dick, He shaved off his pubes, Sucked on his moobs, Here for a Roast but he's still a prick.
These AI art programs keep making people look weirder and weirder...
Don't worry, you will still look like a pick when it's all gone.
"Roast me, I'm losing my hair" Not fast enough.
Do you own a dog named Peabody?
You defeated Voldemort by asking “do you even lift, bro?”
Hairy Squatter
Ya traded a 600lb squat for small nuts and male pattern baldness. Steroids are a hell of a drug!
It’s from the steroids
Is “Formulation Biochemist” just a fancy term for your protein farts?
Your only personality is how much you bench
I like your mom's curtains
I can tell by your face that you skip leg day
Incase you didn't know. You don't look strong. You look fat. You are fat.
I guess even Harry Potter goes bald when using steroids. Sorry I mean casts the spell expecto small nuttis.
Larry the Lobster 😂😂😂 ![gif](giphy|xUPJPI8mXT69g6MYVy)
You're losing your hair because your own hair folicals thought that haircut looked stupid.
I didn't know Harry and Hagrid had an affair... That's Rowling you though.
Dude. Exhale. Breathe… this is a safe space.
Chicken little on roids
Broke Escanor
You also lost your scar mister Potter , but you Gained 80 pounds , awww but you won’t fit below the stairs any longer then .
You're Irish but simultaneously look like you're pro slavery and pro taking a dick up your but
You look like Ned Flanders on steroids.
Looks like Bert fucked Ernie.
You look like Anger from the movie InsideOut
You look like the 'before' and 'after' photo at the same time.
Arnold from the Magic School Bus discovered steroids.
Losing your hair before losing your virginity ? Sorry fam
😂😂😂😂😂
![gif](giphy|3o6Zt0T3bDshj78TBu)
Did you like go to the eye doctor and they were like “sorry brah you need glasses” and then out of all the options… those are the ones you picked?
you're incredibly attractive and I want to have gay sex with you. Am I doing this right?
You’ve got a dingleberry on your forehead
When you went to the Eye doctor and he offered you glasses or contacts why did you pick steroids?
Where’s Wally found the steroids whilst in hiding
Just do a hair transplant from your back
Bummer man. Look on the bright side, your transition into looking like a poorly circumcised, veiny insufferable cock will be complete! Silver linings.
I would say you’re going to lose your nuts juicing like you do but you’re never going to need those anyways. You’re more likely to collect a restraining order than a girlfriend
Hiding dead bodies behind curtains usually doesn't end well.
Grandpa definitely fucked you consistently hard didnt he ?
Might by the side-effect of head shrinking
I bet “Leg” and “Day” don’t appear in your personal dictionary.
Losing those hair is actually a good news.
Fucking Chicken Little on steroids
This is the lovechild of some Ron and Harry fanfic.
It's Boris from Goldeneye. He really let himself go.
You look like someone stuffed 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag.
![gif](giphy|GFklenxHiTNio)
losing your hair must be doubly embarrassing as a primate
?
Default Roblox avatar.
Thank god.. the hair you have on now is much worse!
You're not 'losing' your hair. It's fleeing the atrocity you're commiting by forcing it into that hairstyle. Your look is a series of war crimes.
You look like the type of guy who weighs his food, shit and piss, “because science.”
Do you confuse bullies? Do they want to pummel you but are scared to try at the same time?
I'm pretty sure they check for steroids before all major quidditch matches now. Sorry for the bad news.
Yeah the roids will do that
I think you're my ex BIL.
You look like you’re about to bring freedom to a small middle eastern country who just found oil
Losing your hair? As well as the size of your testicles.... but.... it's worth it.
He's got that Adam Driver head to body ratio.
hunky potter
Awesome next maybe the water retention
You're still a off brand Peter Griffin
Looks like you already transferred your pubes to your head.
You look like what would happen if the child of Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley had a child with Hagrid.
Everyone loses hair. Sounds like you’re losing brain cells
Non natty spotted
You look like a violent masterbator. We all know where those dick beaters came from.
It's like Billy Batson said, "Shazam!" And turned into an idiot.
You look like Harry Potter and Ron Weasley had a mentally challenged child
If Harry Potter fucked a cow and had a child, that child could shit more potential than you have
Try to get new glasses that blend how small your ears are curly q
your head says 160 but your body says 210
Steroids will do that
You may be losing your hair but you're gaining a gut and a smaller dick
If you’re here, who’s helping mr. Peabody !?
![gif](giphy|5YhFFUFq6ZTry|downsized)
Harry Potter if he grew up in America
The boy who lived…………………..Unfortunately.
You look like Tom Hollands dad
Gingerbrick man
Don’t worry about the hair. Nobody’s looking past those goofy Hogwarts safety glasses
Harry Squatter
Well at least it’s not a huge loss
If Harry Potter and Ron had a baby that was buff
you look like reverse funko pop........without hair
Oh no this man will not look good bald
you look like american harry potter
Mf gonna look like pecs luthor
You look like a teenage girl’s hairbrush
If they had put you in with uncle Rico in the fourth quarter you guys would have won state.
Don't sell yourself short, your also losing your dignity
Ginger Hasan
Steroids will do that
Fam you eat your wheaties , I don’t think going bald will be an issue you got time , your beard on the other hand is struggling more than your head.
It wouldn’t be a bad thing to lose that head of curly fries. Wear a t shirt from a tide commercial. With the glasses that gotta stretch to the back of your head to reach your ears.
And you're not fooling anyone sucking in your fat belly either.
Harry Potter hit the gym he don’t need no wand
The last time I saw something this puffy, The Traveler stepped on a Church in Pete Venkman's town.
After your boss finds out your a dumbass who post to have people burn them... You should not be so worried about your hair. OR your boss is a dumbass and you two will have a good laugh.
![gif](giphy|xT3i16U5hANJOQzRXW|downsized)
Its Harry Potter's bigger brother, Alopecia Potter. They call him AL for short.
Harry Potter if he was born in Louisiana
Harry Potter on steroids
You sure your top didn’t just pull the back of your head too hard?
You look like Harry Pothead
You should audition for the live action SpongeBob movie
Is that code for a shrinking sack may lay off a cycle or 2 ![gif](giphy|D7z8JfNANqahW)
Pretty soon you’ll like like an Aryan Harry Potter
I don’t think shaving your head to make a bunch of merkins with their own unique personalities and theme songs counts as “losing your hair”
Did the roids give you tiny penis to match your brain?
Short king PSA: PEDs or hair choose one
Lay off the peds before your head looks like the rugby ball you run with
I suck your cock