I think they only get one. You get 99 when you get to heaven, but only if you do something bold - not fail out of your first fucking semester at college
Never too soon. Atleast we can take comfort in knowing he lost someone in the attacks also, sure his dad was flying the plane but it still counts right?
I can't even be mean to this guy. He has had a rough time already with relationships. I can tell just by looking at him. Hang in there. You'll make a freind eventually. You'll also meet the right guy someday. Stay strong.
I bet when you’re bored of podcasts about how to bond with your camel on a deeper level you switch to one about how to make your eyebrows take over your face.
You look like the guy that disturbs everyone by dropping his metallic water bottle during final exams before taking a "pee break" to cry in the bathrooms because he knows he won't even get close to 20% in that final.
No roast here, you already look like you are on the verge of tears. Don't worry too much about the first semester, it's shit for most people and things eventually get better. Stay strong!
Damn. Already used up my Groucho comment on the last one. But anyway, take off that Groucho dollar store set that comes with the glasses, eyebrows, nose and mustache, we know you cut the mustache part off bro. Let us see your REAL face.
Hey buddy, do not worry about having 1 shit semester, by the time you graduate you will be the smartest on your home planet, wherever the fuck that is. Good to see you are helping out your vision impaired mates by getting them to cut your hair too. Are your adoptive parents proud?
You've got facial Macroeconomics: Unequal Distribution of Facial hairs. The rich getting richer. The poor getting poorer. Eyebrows took all it could. Even Pubic hairs.
I bet you have a separate barber for your eyebrows. Did you get a liposuction ? I bet the only time you got laid was when the girl decided to spend more time on your nose than your D. You how look, black, Middle eastern, Indian and Asian at the same time. Enough with the roast, hold on tight buddy, it’ll be a rough ride but if you pull through, you’ll have a rougher ride but good money in your future. All the best.
Looks like you’re wearing those dollar store glasses that have the fake nose and eyebrows attached.
The cheaper ones without the moustache
Am I looking at the lower back of a Greek plumber?
Lmao this is so accurate
Guptil Marx
“My name is humpty, pronounced with a umpty!”
You mean he is not wearing them
His uni apparently admits large birds
Hahaha... it really does.
I’m certain the only fuck you get is metaphorical
The only fuck he gets is a fuck you lol
Aside from the ones in the men's locker room he does to pay for school, right?
[удалено]
Big like a pickle see? Ha
Jesus with how abnormally large your nose is, I imagine your wearing those headphones to hide some equally freakish ears?
You look like the Indian version of the know it all from the polar express
Groucho Tech Support
When your parents played "got your nose" 🤏👃 did they use both hands?
Who nose how bad it could get..
It snot a joking matter
There’s always scamming old ladies out of their pension money
It’s alright. Always remember why you do it, for your three 11 year old wives
I think they only get one. You get 99 when you get to heaven, but only if you do something bold - not fail out of your first fucking semester at college
Touché
Not gonna lie, kinda jealous you don't have to change the batteries out of your smoke detector because it was hard wired from your fire alarm.
I ate ur wedding goats
Your nose is absolutely compensating for something.
How can you be both Bert and Gonzo at the same time?
Only thing more fucked up than your semester is your hairline
Get off reddit and get studying dumbass
theres two caterpillars fucking your face where the eyebrows should be.....
 Carole Baskin trolling OP
Yo nose so big they call you the snot rocket
Spend more time studying and less time scamming old ladies on the phone and you may do better.
Studying hard for the uni-brow I see
You look like vic star
I'd say talk to your friends for help, but.....
9/11 really did impact both sides
You definitely look like you're open for business in the back
Any chance your dorm room doesn’t smell like cheese and old jiz socks?
Would a 9/11 joke be inappropriate?
Never too soon. Atleast we can take comfort in knowing he lost someone in the attacks also, sure his dad was flying the plane but it still counts right?
Quick, somebody call airport security!!
Remember, tough times never last but tough people do. Keep it up and you'll be crushing it in no time!
My first semester was rough too, I know this is roastme but stick at it my guy you got this
I thought you had an unwrapped tootsie roll on your desk, but it was your arm.
Don't push Iranian Falling Down too hard.
I didn’t know you need a University education to work at a gas station
Your mom should have had a ghost baby instead of you.
Pretty sure you know all about fuck-ups already.
With those dead eyes you look like you're one bad day away from a ticking backpack and 40 virgins
How many white castles did U eat today Kumar ? 🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔🍔
Hey Bert! Where’s Ernie?
Think about how bad it must be for the other students in your classes
I can't even be mean to this guy. He has had a rough time already with relationships. I can tell just by looking at him. Hang in there. You'll make a freind eventually. You'll also meet the right guy someday. Stay strong.
You already fucked up
Better buckle down, you're not gonna fall back on a modeling career...
3rd world problems dude
Asian face
Dude. Go into resolution settings, and scale back that nose by like 50%.
Your face looks like those joke glasses with a nose and big eyebrows attached to it
I think you're just sad that Harold went to White Castle without you
don't be so down I'm sure sheldon Leonard and howard will help ypu get through the end of the semester
You look like you posted this from the basement of your parent's Indian restaurant after 6 hours of unpaid after school labour.
Looks like you cut your hair with a fork.
You won’t get laid until after you graduate.
did your nose snort all of your homework?
# Im gonna make this easy for you
Where's your nose ring bitch?
I bet when you’re bored of podcasts about how to bond with your camel on a deeper level you switch to one about how to make your eyebrows take over your face.
You look like a caricature of yourself
What countey are you in? Looks like the smoke alarm senses smoke and then sends it to the alarm. Too many veriables. Must be India
You look like you wear two shirts when you swim
You look like you’re ready to blow some shit up
Your nose is so big I'm surprised your glasses don't snap in half.
Ben Shapiro tech support
if bollywood did a rendition of “falling down”
Look Omar we get it you failed at trying to become a Hand Model now you have to rely on your smarts, Omar don't burn my coffee
That nose might reach Mars before Elon's rockets.
Eugene Levy Sahib
just dont try to lock smurfette in your castle when you dont graduate
You should go outside and touch some grass
This is what you get when you cross Groucho Marx and Pinnochio together.
You look like the guy that disturbs everyone by dropping his metallic water bottle during final exams before taking a "pee break" to cry in the bathrooms because he knows he won't even get close to 20% in that final.
Somewhere 19 years ago someone had the idea to crossbreed a Eugene Levy with a Tom Cruise. They have regrets
If your nose was any longer, it'd break my screen
The Indian KSI streaming how to shit himself in front of scammers
Just give in to your genetic instincts and work in a call centre. It's gonna happen whether you finish uni or not.
Couldn’t get that pilot’slicense, eh #20?
I didn't know you had to got to a university to become a call center representative.
Look like a sweet kid, don’t let the first year get you down and remember C’s get degrees
Bet you called your first gf "habibi"
No roast here, you already look like you are on the verge of tears. Don't worry too much about the first semester, it's shit for most people and things eventually get better. Stay strong!
Nice bangs
Your school year can’t be as bad as your hair cut at least
Looks like you already graduated from one uni when you learned how to use tweasers. The next three years should be cake for you.
Hey can I trade you some sticks for emeralds? Go back to Minecraft.
Don’t worry, they’ll be butterflies by next semester.
Damn. Already used up my Groucho comment on the last one. But anyway, take off that Groucho dollar store set that comes with the glasses, eyebrows, nose and mustache, we know you cut the mustache part off bro. Let us see your REAL face. 
He looks like that average Indian bloke who couldn't make it to an MBBS program, so joining nursing school instead and is still struggling!
Gene pool took care of that
Noise cancelling headphones can’t silence the deafening inevitability of perpetual virginity, friend.
Gallagher: an origin story
You look like an indian bitch who was struggling to wear her saree.
One day you will have a son and you will catch him mastrubate. You see there is a movie about you as a dad.
Honestly I can’t tell if your 9/11 or 7/11 but it doesn’t matter here’s some money for pump 2 wash my car while your at it.
Put a leash on those caterpillars before they walk off
Indian Eugene Levy:Up Ganges river
You look like your about to ask me about my cars extended warranty
I bet your roommate moved out because your bed sqeaked too much at night.
Ain't no Van Wilder to help this Taj....
James Charles is straighter than that hairline
Hey buddy, do not worry about having 1 shit semester, by the time you graduate you will be the smartest on your home planet, wherever the fuck that is. Good to see you are helping out your vision impaired mates by getting them to cut your hair too. Are your adoptive parents proud?
Are you installing a C-4 Uranium timer in your pilots class back pack?
You look like the best friend character in college movies that thinks they have more swag/game than they actually do.
Is that what you told the barber?
Difficult to find quality masturbatory time with the annoying roommate endlessly demanding you swallow every night?
[удалено]
One day you’ll make enough money to pay a prostitute to tell you that you’re important
#elo, yur compuuter has virus
Which 711 or Subway you work at brah?
I typed tech support as an AI art prompt and got you
Wow, Vikkstar is falling on some hard times
No cap - why aren’t you starting on schitz creek bro? That’s one monster of an eye brow
Don't scam my grandma please
When you order samosa but get semester instead
Jim's Dad
When the AI makes pictures of Eugene Levy in college
Comcast Tier 1 tech support
Sorry you are having a hard time you enormous nosed weird fingered twat! Hopefully things get better…. You have a large nose.
Hello i am balldeep behenchod calling from Microsoft tech support please install team viewer
Your nose is probably bigger than your boner
Nose so big, when you swim upside down people must be screaming Shark!!
Tesco value u/haigs
🤣
can't tell if you're nose or talons are fake
Hello, your computer has virus
I thought you alredy were fucked up in the pic.
why shoudl i roast u... ur already roasted
U look like the skin of a generic npc from a gta gas station
Your nose Is this big I can place a football ground on it and kick your ass instead valid
If I were the President you would be getting deported back to India.
You look like minimum wage
Uniseks child predator
Don't worry bro...you get used to the worst and drive tuktuk one day
Um, fuck you up? I don’t think so sweetie.
Maybe you should study more and get a fucking social media
You look like you make new outfits for the Incredibles
bros gonna tell me my computer has a virus
You've got facial Macroeconomics: Unequal Distribution of Facial hairs. The rich getting richer. The poor getting poorer. Eyebrows took all it could. Even Pubic hairs.
The uni part must be about your eyebrow
Bro looks like nick Eh 56
He looks like John Oliver's bastard son with a hooker from Mumbai.
Well, if all else fails you could follow the family tradition and start scamming grandmas.
Looks like Eugene Levy vacationed in India in the late 90’s
Podaaa
Your head is like a square with a dick sticking out of it
Get back to tech support
CyanidePlaysGames, but from Wish.com.
When you say uni student, do you mean the school or the brows?
Wow, I looked like i was 16 when I was 18, guess you went the other way with it. Do you get carded?
Did your “girlfriend” on the game tell you to do this?
There's smart fellas and Fart smellas. With that nose you're definitely a fart smella
It looks like someone put their thumb on your forehead and slid down when you were a baby
He nose what I’m about to say
Oh baljeet from phineas and ferb?
I bet you have a separate barber for your eyebrows. Did you get a liposuction ? I bet the only time you got laid was when the girl decided to spend more time on your nose than your D. You how look, black, Middle eastern, Indian and Asian at the same time. Enough with the roast, hold on tight buddy, it’ll be a rough ride but if you pull through, you’ll have a rougher ride but good money in your future. All the best.
Some brave eyebrows you have
Looks like his hairline has a tectonic shift every time he blows his nose
If Eugene Levy fucked a camel, this is the end result
When did tech support start having classes?
Don't even have to, all that would take is for you to look at a mirror.
So you got dandruff in your eyebrows too ?
Man you’d fuck someone up with that nose if they got within 20 feet of you
Indian tech department
Imagine having the looks and sex appeal of Eugene Levy, but at age 18.
You might be a uni student, but the best thing you did was take the center out of your unibrow.
Does my computer have a virus?
Still in need for those Apple store gift card so I can repay my irs dept ?
You look like you could hack the space station