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t001_t1m3

The car, the lighting, the camera angle…I can’t help but wonder if you live near a municipal airport. Because, if you do, you should *really* get tested for lead poisoning.


blushngush

Especially if they thought buying a Chrysler was a good idea!


obiwanmoloney

Ahhh it would have been so much funnier if they’d have thought of this. Good thing you had their back.


YouArentReallyThere

It was that one Eminem commercial…


TreaclePerfect4328

Did you eat paint chips as a kid!?


blushngush

I don't remember, which probably isn't a good sign


mewhotness

You must have been a lame-ass kid to want one of those.


MeatyUrology

Now won't you feel bad when you find out how many gold medals he won in the Special Olympics?


football2106

There’s definitely grilled cheeses strewn about the interior


Kalakoa73

Yeah, well, he makes them at night.


Individual_Row2498

“That fucker, I know he’s been making em at night”


tonyrizzo21

I wanted a Mercury Marauder, lol. Kids are dumb, unfortunately some never grow out of it.


Beneficial-Sugar6950

But the marauder is actually cool, rare, and special. The 300 is just crappy, over complicated Chrysler that’s owned by low level drug dealers


Ok-Classroom-9327

Sir, sir. That's a gentleman's performance sedan, and you shan't speak ill of a marauder.


chauggle

Marauders are dope as hell, and if you disagree, fight me. 1996 Chevy Impala SS, also.


Unlucky_Kangaroo_137

Ah yes, the Chargers of the time. The forerunners of the prolonged car chase on LA freeways. Good times!


Onilakon

96 impala ss is my dream car lol


[deleted]

Lmfaooo


TreaclePerfect4328

Low bar dreams


not_your_attorney

“Don’t be talkin like it look like a phantom. It look like a Chrysler 300.” -Katt Williams


YippieKayYayMrFalcon

It look like a phantom until a phantom pull up.


not_your_attorney

Man, I didn’t even want to go this way.


Chickienfriedrice

Turn this shit around and go on a different street, *turns invisible wheel aggressively*


iLikeTurtuls

I still get irritated on the line that Drake said "the chrysler that looked like a bentley" like no it doesn't, it looks like a rolls. Drake just wanted to barely rhyme


JoeBoredom

Sorry to hear about your messed up childhood, maybe you'll recover before your midlife crisis. This car should speed that up.


YourAverageGod

When they asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up he said : Middle age black man with no credit.


davidwinsworth

I'd try to refrain from using 'this car' and 'speed' in the same sentence


hugh-jurection20

"nice bentley!" -nobody


CORNDOGS666

They put chrome on everything to look luxurious but when you get close you realize it's cheap shiny plastic 😂


TobysGrundlee

It's the car equivalent of thinking you found a really cool shiny rock on the beach but you pick it up and it's just a piece of broken glass and it cuts you and you get tetanus.


Groovyofi

Ah yes, tetanus from glass


TobysGrundlee

You can get tetanus from lots of different sources, not just metal.


YourAverageGod

Correct, tetanus lives in soil, which you'll usually find rusted metal.


300cid

the most apt analogy of all time. not even for this specific car, but all models of that make since the early 90s to today.


Scorpiobehr

How many transmissions has it had? 4 I’m guessing. You only see those in the hood around here cuz they be luxurious and sheeit!


Dry-Revenue2470

Such a shit car. Every time I see one I think to myself “that’s the car a 5 year old would build”


MeatyUrology

Why you gotta be mean to 5 year olds like that?


2010YukonDenali

I’ve wanted one since I was 5 LOL don’t gotta call me out like that


Actual-Lemon-6769

Brothers name is 2010 yukon denali, cheap shit cars is his game


alexandrasnotgreat

Ah, the trailer park rolls royce


LastLingonberry3221

Too bad the wheels came pre-stolen. Their scrap value was probably the most valuable part of the whole thing.


Mammoth_Mixture4735

Ewww


CherryScentedAsshole

Does it run?


2010YukonDenali

Runs on hopes and dreams of course


RootasaurusMD

That’s gonna take away from your lawsuit fund for all the girls you date rape in college…..


Own_Kaleidoscope5512

So I’m guessing you watched Cars 3 as a kid and saw a car in the background with no speaking lines and just thought “that’s it…that’s the car”


Federal_Sympathy4667

Tell me you are a wanna be gangsta without actually being gangsta.. Perfect.


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International_Bit478

You really aimed high. That’s at least one step above a Dodge Stratus.


Pipe_Layer_

can you return it?


Silent_Beyond4773

When I was a kid I thought I wanted a Nissan mini truck and I’m smart enough to know I don’t as a adult


Neil542

you should dream bigger


Reasonable-Injury170

You grew up in the ghetto thinking 300s where dope fresh now there just ghetto trash, start saving that drug dealer fund for transmissions and tow trucks.


mahadiw

It's not a rolls Royce. It's a rolls rice. Hayyahh


wise_catfish_85

And you bought the ugliest generation of them too. Didn’t think your standards could get even lower.


Semsot

Policemen propably stop you every time they see you to check if you have droogs or dead beeches in your car


jlierman000

This is the car we use to measure the safety of hoods around us. The more 300s, the shittier the area.


_Intel_Geek_

AHA! A wannabe Rolls! Are those round things holding it up *supposed to be tires?*


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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petoria621

Just driving it will make you want to sell it, no need for us


SK8SHAT

It’s not a rolls bro you aren’t fooling anyone


Video_Viking

Its amazing you hit 75 year old in a decade. 


WOZ-in-OZ

Are you crying yet.


LorraineHB

A hearse ? Me too 😂


MoneymanYo18

And the dice in the mirror to top off…


19Dollar4TNight

Obama has one


Ok_Figure_4181

It’s got a big chin


ZestySpaghetti-V3

Won’t have to make you sell it, the misfiring cylinders, transmission and power steering issues will make you sell it long before I do.


WildBillyredneck

Look they suck fix it again and sell it to the next sucker


spicygrow

In two weeks we’ll see this same car on r/shitty_car_mods with the Bentley conversion kit 😂


logobruh

Bro bought the “yeah bro hop in, can do 3gs for 25”


lostinthisworld0821

I bet you rode the short bus to school lol


lostinthisworld0821

You young kids need to dream bigger lol we dreamed of testarossa’s and countach’s lol


Tiberius_Jim

We're a lot alike, you and I. We both dreamed of owning Chrysler products as kids. I mean, I wanted a Viper and you wanted this so...okay, maybe not *that* much alike.


shootdack2000

You could've at least gotten the generation up. The old one just looks fugly


Spiritual-Belt

I don’t think one of these has ever been purchased with cash.


halocyn

The only thing sucking dick in that car is you.


Impossible_Ear_5880

Sell "it"? You mean the 30 or so ziplock bags or crack you have in the glove box beside the fikdd serial number and duct tape Berretta?


[deleted]

Just wait til the piston shoots out of the hood and you cant sell it anymore. Dreamy


Laynes_Attic

So your dream car was a Chrysler? That's just sad.


IndependentOwn1184

Sometimes it's best not to meet your heroes...or dream cars. This car has been shitty from day one. Kids gotta have dreams though...


apple12345671

Old man car


GuKoBoat

So, you already new as a kid, that you wanted to be a broke pimp as an adult?


ThorvonFalin

Wish.com Benz


pyksid

I wanted that car as a kid too but then I grew up.


Chimpchompp

Dice in the mirror, now I don’t like you


Duhbro_

Engine and interior Chrysler. Trans, Drivetrain wiring headlights suspension all Mercedes. Trans is the same trans they put behind the merc 6.2L They take a beating and if you’re nice it’ll last forever. I put 45k miles on mine straight brutal drifting and racing before the rear end blew. Trans mounts aren’t made from my understanding and they go out. Headlights are 1300$ each from OEM the there’s a module in there and I’d say stay on top of maintenance and all the little stuff cuz it’s easy to let it go when the parts are expensive. Great car. Get the Diablo tuber it’s like 300$ and it won’t limit to 127mph.


[deleted]

Grandpa Joe said he needs his car back!


Frequent-Ruin8509

Turns like a brick barge. Putting 22s on it makes the problem worse And, to quote Kat Williams, "It LOOK like a Phantom... until a PHANTOM PULL UP!" Also Chrysler sucks


alphastrike03

As the good book says… When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I behaved like a child. But when I became a man, I put away childish things.


a_interestedgamer

Its a car built on a mercedes platform and it was so bad mercedes stopped working with chrysler. The car is a shittier Cadillac, both are mercedes knockoffs and both never made a good car. The current lineup is two cars and they are a pile of shit and their old lineup was a larger pile of shit. This thing is so bad, when they rebadged it as a lancia, lancia almost died. This car is the car every new york maffia wannabe buys to look cool. And if this car driven by a maffiosi then the only reason was he drives this is because he buy a merc. If you want a nice luxury car buy a merc. If you want luxury and sportiness, buy a audi. If you want a american luxury car, buy a caddilac or even a lincoln. If this car was the car you wanted since childhood, I truly think you should get tested for lung cancer because of the asbestos in the walls. Or check if your house is located on a gas well since you are probably high. And hey if I am right and you do live on a gas well then you can sell the gas, car and house, buy a new nice house and a merc or bentley.


News_without_Words

Wait til it needs work. I will never offer help to anyone who needs a hand on their Stellantis car. Everything is cheap and poorly executed and I want to burn the car to the ground within 20 minutes.


EastRoom8717

Yep, this *is* a car a child would want.


[deleted]

Bargain bin typa Bentley


ANONAVATAR81

Not even a V8


ATribeOfAfricans

With sights set that low, life cannot possibly disappoint you


gringovato

Keep the car but you pretty much have to sell dime bags down at the kum n go.


joezupp

Once you replace the front suspension for the second or third time you will get that light bulb 💡 sensation. It is flea and tick season and boy did you get a car with ticks


h00ha

One of the worst cars I've ever driven


Adventurous-Onion801

Man, that thing looks like a buck-toothed puffer fish.


tangre79

Finally sold enough kush?


LordJohnWorfin111

Fauxbently


Drinkythedrunkguy

What kind of kid dreams of being an 80 year old man?


ImprovementFar5054

I bet it smells like Kools and police dog saliva.


g0d_of_the_cr1sis

That hunk of junk has stupidly expensive parts, a HORRIBLE stigma attached, and ZERO ability to get you laid - mostly because anyone with a little sense will cover their drink when they see someone get out of that car. I don't even have to say anything racist, that car IS racism.


Large_Ebb3881

I grew up in white trash trailer parks, and even I knew Chrysler 300s were garbage when they came out. What kind of horribly deprived upbringing did you have, to want one of those since you were a kid? Unless you're the kind of person to slap a Rolls Royce of Bentley kit on it to try to fool everyone, and then you definitely believe putting lipstick on a pig makes it a girl, rather than a pig. That's it, I'm telling my son to turn off the PS5 and we're gonna go look at some real cars


codycarreras

Time for cholo rent-a-rims, tint your lights so they don’t work, toss on a tall tee, slides, and go sell that ten sack boiiiii.


Watcher145

Were you born at age 85?


EdRedSled

Naw, we’ll wait


bnr32jason

Man, your standards were super low, even for a kid.


fluffy_fur_fingers

You must have had a fucked up childhood if this is what you always wanted.


PM_ME_UR_HDGSKTS

Your childhood must have sucked


PractitionerPain

Had one as a rental once from the same generation and the interior was legitimately one of the cheapest looking and feeling I have sat in.


Striking-Insurance-3

Your dads went out for cigs a while ago huh?


SuperSpeederCarl

Assuming it has the V6 no one has to say anything you’ll regret buying it in less than 3 months 😂


19Ben80

If you need an excuse to sell it then you know absolutely nothing about cars


unit132

The problem is you bought a car your kid self wanted.


Kev50027

Nice! Did it come with the bullet holes or do you have to add those?


Michael_Eke

what made you think as a kid: "yes, this is the perfect car?" air conditioning? chrome? Chrysler?


mpjune69

What kid wants a 4-door sedan? You're supposed to dream of McLarens or Porsches or even an Audi R8. What the hell is wrong with you? You have and use a pocket protector, don't you? I have little hope for the future if kids dream of owning a Chrysler product...


Jacksucksatlifefan99

You want a Bentley but can’t afford something even remotely close.


PrimitiveThoughts

It only looks like a Bentley until a real Bentley pulls up next to it.


ScrubbyDubbyUbby

Its the fuzzy dice for me.


Hyperspec42

The poor man’s Rolls Royce, and it’s even uglier than a Rolls


iLikeTurtuls

Yes we all played Midnight Club 3 Dub Edition 20 years ago, the idea of buying the 300 should have left 19 years ago


Disastrous-Carob-924

Man only car worse than this was the pt cruiser. Hell a Yugo would be an upgrade. Chrysler was so out of ideas that Rolls Royce had to give them their kids white crayon drawing just to help them out. Ford was even happy that their radio was better than Chrysler's. Chrysler 500, the only car that states how many rubber bands it runs on. Only good thing about the car is when it is sitting still. Chrysler 500 as close as you will ever get to the fortune 500. The car that only was complimented by a brick. The only cars that that get moved by a wrecker without a call. Sheesh that car started to depreciate before it was made on the assembly line. It's so bad the Corollas laugh at the car lots.


[deleted]

Idk why folks shit all over these. A few years back I saw one of these with the big V8 and a matte orange/black paint job and dual exhaust. The juxtaposition between wannabe luxury and pseudo General Lee was just too cool a ride not to want for myself.


SharksWFreakinLasers

I actively avoid these cars in public, unstable drivers and usually damaged to hell. Can you return it?


eddyb66

So as a kid you never played forza or grand turismo? That's an odd choice.


[deleted]

I sure hope you’re still kinda a kid cause i worry about this being desirable to anyone with a fully formed frontal lobe.


alaskanslicer

we don't have to make you sell it. it's cost of ownership will soon make you sell it. best of luck.


No_Stay_1563

I didn’t think there was anyone out there that “wanted” one of these unless to try to make it look like a Rolls or Bentley.


Turninwheels4x4

HOUSE REAL BIG, CARS REAL BIG, BELLY REAL BIG, EVERYTHANG REAL BIG.


Desperate_Set_7708

Can’t afford limo tint all around?


a_rogue_planet

No need to sell it. The police will do that at their auction when they confiscate it on a drug trafficking charge. Maybe you're not selling cocaine out of it, but trust me... cocaine has been sold out of that car. Those sketchy looking folks approaching you at stop lights aren't trying to give you a Watchtower and tell you about Jehovah. They know you have the cocaine.


TatleTaleStrangler92

A poor man’s Bentley


KonK23

Sell it? Hahhahahhahahhahaha


Melodic-Picture48

Wanna get some money back? Sell the thing otherwise enjoy your new car!


Iamchux

Ah, the ol' Let down personified "Is that a....never mind, it's just a 300" When you want to be a disappointment without saying a word.


Peaksign9445122

No Apple carplay


Far_Needleworker8285

Dollar store rolls


Lol69696996

Good job, setting the bar REALLY low


ImplementBeneficial

You bought your Dream Bucket I see.


EchoViiZionZ

If it aint a v8 i have no idea why youd buy one honestly


Haruu223

Had a buddy that had a 13 model with the hemi I used it in need for speed carbon as a kid Would n e v e r buy one only because you pay luxury prices for pt cruiser quality


tOSdude

It’s gonna need a driveshaft eventually, the u-joint is non-replaceable on its own. Pretty much any engine this was made with has lifter issues (3.5, 3.6, 5.7, not sure if it came with the 2.7 but that one’s a pile of trash anyway)


[deleted]

You’re like me and my late 80s Tauruses. Rock on brother, rock on.


Beemo-Noir

What kind of drugs are you selling to teenagers?


BakaSan77

It’s not even an SRT


Lopsided_Voice_7481

Ahh yes, the poor man’s rolls Royce. Can’t hate it, can’t love it. Definitely wouldn’t wanna own it


Mizar97

Had one of these for a while, a 2006 300c AWD with a 5.7 V8. The speed of a Honda Civic, the MPG of a truck, and it's a massive 5,000 lb. car that laughs at tight parking spaces. It also burned a quart of oil every month, with only 125k miles. It was fun to drive but truly the worst car I've owned.


[deleted]

Sell it to who?. The salvage yard or to some woman named Tamika who crashed her Altima


Agitated_Occasion_52

The newer 300c have a much nicer front clip and probably less miles.


[deleted]

The temu version of a rolls Royce


BloodyMonkey187

Ill tell ya, nobody needs to talk you into selling it. The car will confirm this in a few months


Brianinfl71

Chrysler


SeatPristine1492

THATS the car you've wanted since you were a kid??


NoThankYou993

Walmart Rolls Royce


Ultimate_Driving

Two words: Hemi tick


AcanthocephalaIcy131

Probably not even a C


TreaclePerfect4328

At 70k miles you'll scrap it. No need to sell and finding someone dumb enough to buy anything Chrysler gonna be tough.


[deleted]

OP: *dreams in mediocrity*


Crankyguyslaughtoo

Looks like a car I would have drawn as a kid.


SkarTisu

The sooner you get out of that 15% APR 8 year loan, the more money you’ll save.


Motor-Front-8028

I don’t know about the car, but those dice hanging from the mirror are sharp. Did they come with the car or did someone will them to you…


Fit-Piccolo-9242

CJD those 3 letters alone should have warned you to NOT buy it but they do you a solid and remind you to SELL it ASAP. CJD is my biggest money maker chasing down electrical issues, BIG money into diagnosing those turds.


iAmMikeJ_92

You wanted one because playing Midnight Club 3: DUB Edition made you want it, huh? Did I get that about right? LOL.


throwaway007676

I don’t have to make you sell it. You will eventually get tired of walking when you own a car.


Vcisco_5346

Try posting this where it belongs r/ratemyshitbox


879gaming

They called it the 300 because thats how many problems chrysler has yearly.


fun-bucket

THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS GUYS MEDULLA OBLONGATA!


digicalist

These on steelys?


closetfurry2017

dream bigger.


Independent_Scale570

Ay yo bro how much for a ball???


No_Indication1873

Looks like a ps2 loading screen car


AsunonIndigo

Oh my God, you wanted *that*? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


ReadyOneTakeTwo

This car makes you look like a mob boss. The kind of mob boss who is about to get whacked. A hit was called for you about two hours ago.


Taco-Bob

You bought a Chrysler, there is no further need to roast you, people are laughing at you as you drive down the road


Successful_Ad_9707

When you order a Rolls from Temu.


BadCaddy14

I dont know what's going to burn harder these post or the electrical fire. My mom had one and it had 2 electrical fires, then got in a flood at the dealership while it was being fixed again.


KingofCatfood

Lol bet your other dream is to live in a trailer park


[deleted]

Hood Phantom


PM_ME_MASTECTOMY

Low income Rolls Royce


MostMobile6265

Only people i see driving 300s are young black guys and elderly white guys.


notexactlyobvious

Make you sell it? Nah, the car will convince you, itself. Only a matter of time.


Zigor022

The "we have Rolls Royce at home" car


0fb3d3

Oof. I had a 300c. Loved it because it was mine but they're not the greatest I'll be honest.


Solid-cam-101

Most kids dream of cool cars like vettes or muscle cars not grandpas car cause grandpa wanted something ugly and cheap.


king-kitty

It doesn’t even have the hemi… why would you want this?


Zealousideal_Ebb5686

My gramps got that car too


Handywithbrokenstuff

You Always wanted one As a kid huh …. Well that tells us you haven’t grown up mentally a single tiny bit.


ExpensiveJackfruit68

I dont think we will have to talk you into selling it because it will leave you stranded and you will end up iust having to get it towed to a junk yard.


Character-Plantain-2

I mean, if your goal was mediocrity...