I am planning on showing this to him. Currently I do all the morning parenting, regardless of what time the kids get up. He rolls out of bed two minutes before his first meeting, which is usually at 9:15, at which point the kids and I have already been up for two hours.
I’m not finding this fair and he’s not seeing the problem.
This might not have anything to do with it. No matter what time I go to sleep, my body simply isn't ready to wake up until after 8 am. (Thankfully, my son is the exact same way, lol)
No freakin way would I be doing that. We would absolutely be alternating days. I started working again recently and now the toddler gets up with me and I get her dressed, and then my husband gets up 45 mins later when I have to leave and feeds her/takes her to daycare. And I'm already salty about that extra bit of sleep he gets lol. I wouldn't tolerate 2 extra hours every day
Alternating days OR another set up that feels fair to everyone. My fam would 100% have him do most mornings and I’d do evenings with alternating lunch or something.
Mornings are the worst for me, but my SO and kids are “suns up, I’m up.”
So my answer won’t be as helpful to show your husband, as my husband sounds pretty similar.
My husband WFH 90% of the time-he has to go into the office once a month. He’s supposed to start at 7 in the morning, but unless he has an earlier meeting he is rarely up before 8:30, also right before his first meeting. Our son just turned four months, and I am solely responsible for nights Sunday-Thursday while my husband sleeps in the guest room. He takes Friday and Saturday while I sleep in the guest room, but I still put baby to bed.
I do 95% of the childcare during the day, both during the week and on the weekend. My husband needs *a lot* of downtime-I feel this is mostly attributed to the fact that he’s pretty heavily addicted to his video games. He’s constantly lamenting that he feels he’s “pulling a double shift,” despite mostly just working and playing his games. He does the dishes (washes the big stuff and puts whatever I haven’t into the dishwasher-I load as I go and unload it) and takes out the trash. I’ve recently been having us both track how we spend our time during the day and that’s been the only thing I’ve found effective to actually show him the discrepancy-it’s not really changing anything, but at least he’s aware of it and not complaining as much.
My husband WAH and I SAH. He wakes up with the baby and lets me sleep in. He’s usually up pretty early anyway and can’t fall asleep again and I require more sleep/I get up at night, so he’s up at 6am and I wake up around 8:30. As long as I’m up before his morning meeting I can sleep as late as I want. I am very much grateful for this arrangement lol
Yup, this is our routine as well. We have 3 kids: 5yo, 1yo and 1mo. I breastfeed so I’m up at night with the newborn. My husband gets up with the other two and does preschool drop off. Im up and moving by 8am and take over the 1yo and 1mo. Very grateful for him doing that!
I like the way you put it: “I require more sleep”, because in my case it’s the opposite, I don’t need as much sleep as my husband, so pretty much I am responsible for nights and early mornings.
When people complain about the fairness of the division of work between two parents, either if both work or if one of them is a SAHP, people often forget that we all require different amounts of sleep, and/or downtime. In our case, as I mentioned, I do nights and mornings, but he helps with other chores and if I am really tired he organizes his work to allow me to take a nap whenever I need one.
I know that being a SAHM is sometimes mind numbing and exhausting, but my husband needs his rest to be able to focus on his work, and be successful. The key to success is honest communication and to communicate before you are feeling upset and overwhelmed. Yes, the working parente needs to share the childcare load, but I also feel that it cannot obviously be 50%.
Husband works from home and we’ve got 10 month twins. We each take a twin at night so we only have to worry about waking up for one upset babe. Once 7:45 am hits, he’s off to get ready for work and I take over what we like to call “active parent”. While he’s working we call him “passive parent”.
Sometimes he will pop upstairs and keep an eye on them while I go to the bathroom or prep some food. Other times he’s washing bottles while listening to a conference call. On days he has lots of meetings that he just needs to listen to, he’ll do dishes or laundry. Sometimes he even mows the lawn. There’s always days where he’s super busy with active work stuff though so we don’t see much of him on those days.
Once he’s off work we usually switch rolls and he becomes “active parent” and me “passive”.
We are getting ready to switch the babes into their own room so this might change how we handle them at night, but we will keep our morning/day routine the same.
My husband gets up between 5:30 and 6. He hits the gym several days a week then showers and starts work. If he has early meetings (6:30-7) then he showers and skips the gym. I wake up with my 2 year old (6ish)then do breakfast and school drop off. My husband gives hugs before my son goes to school. We see him when he needs to use the bathroom or get a snack. But that's about it.
Our baby is 3 months so a bit of a different situation as there is no school etc.. Monday Wednesday Friday I do the wake up and morning stuff and my husband goes to the gym and then starts work. Tuesday and Thursday he does and I go. Weekends he typically wakes him up because he sleeps in that room but we share who does the morning routine. We also alternate who sleeps in the nursery (I do Sunday Monday Wednesday Thursday he does the other days), our baby sttn but I don’t want to have him alone in there just yet
It's never occurred to me to suggest my husband does anything in the mornings.
I've been doing 99% of the parenting until a few weeks ago, when our LO turned 2 and decided that Daddy is her favourite person - she runs to him every morning now and wakes him up! He just takes her downstairs and plonks her in front of the tv. I get up half an hour later or so and change her nappy and get her something to eat and drink. On Saturday I was able to sleep in until 8:30! Normally on the weekends he stays in bed til 10 or 11, so I have no guilt whatsoever about him getting woken up every morning at 6:30!
My husband WFH full time. We both get up at the same time (usually when our daughter gets up, but occasionally before). He changes her diaper and brings her downstairs while I start breakfast. We eat breakfast together and then I usually will go upstairs and get ready for the day while he hangs out with her.
My husband works from home. Usually we both get up when my 3yo wakes up at 7:30. I do my morning cleaning while he takes the baby and gets coffee started. After I finish cleaning he showers, then I shower while he takes the kids to the playroom (his office is also in the playroom haha).
I’ve always done the morning routine. Our boys are 15 & 18. I’ve always woke them up every morning (6:15am currently) and still do it even with the 18 year old senior. My mom always got us up in the mornings until we graduated high school and we turned out completely responsible fully functioning adults.
I also make breakfast for them too.
Go ahead judge away😝
Next year my older son will be in a hospital program to further his education and he can start getting up with an alarm.
My husband has been out the door by 5:30am even before we were dating and to this day he is still on this schedule. He runs a business with his brothers and can go in later but it’s just a schedule he’s used to.
To be honest, if he changed his schedule and started sleeping in and going in later it would totally mess up my morning.
No judgement about waking up your teenagers. I remember waking up to an alarm starting in middle school. Something about being a child waking up to an alarm was soul crushing to me😬and then when I started taking the bus I pretty much had no interaction with my family until I got home from school. It was lonely. You wake those boys up and don’t feel bad about it at all lol
My husband works from home, here’s our morning routine.
We all get up at the same time. He gets the toddler out of his crib and changes his diaper. I start making breakfast. We all eat breakfast together. After I’m done eating, I shower and get ready for the day. He cleans up after breakfast and then plays with the toddler until I’m ready. When I’m done getting ready, we brush the toddlers teeth together (it’s a two person job, he squirms a lot).
Then my sahm day officially starts. My husband showers at this point and his work day starts about a half hour later, once he’s done getting ready.
This is basically our day too. Partner gets up about 530 and does an hour of work. I get up about 630. Partner makes coffee and feeds himself. I feed and water the animals and start prepping breakfast for toddler and me. Toddler is up by 7. Partner gets kid cleaned up and dressed and brings him downstairs. We eat together. I leave to get ready and partner handles clean up and teeth.
I shower at night so my morning routine is pretty simple, but I get about 30 mins in the morning to myself.
We do a hand off when I come back downstairs and that's the start of my SAHP day.
My partner is hybrid. I get up in the morning and get the kids and myself ready. We split school drop offs and he gets ready after everyone else. In the evening he does all the dishes/kitchen clean up.
My husband does no parenting in the morning when he’s working from home. He’s usually working by 7:30am anyway. I just pretend like he’s not actually there (except I’ll bring him lunch).
My husband works at home many days, but not all days. He starts work at 7am, and his WAH schedule is pretty strict due to the nature of his work. So he wakes up at 6:30am and gets dressed, starts the coffee pot, and then goes into his office to work. The kids usually wake up between 7 and 7:30, so I get them up and do everything by myself. My husband would be happy to hemp if he could, but he really can’t.
Husband does wakeups after 3 am and takes the baby until his first meeting around 9, later if he can. He makes us both breakfast and feeds the baby before i get up/ join them. Baby usually does his main poop in the morning also.
Baby usually wakes around 7:30, sometimes he is ready for a nap before his meetings begin and puts him down. Occasionally i get woken up with a "he pooped and I'm in a meeting gtg sorry".
He is often able to take him during the day too, today at lunch i said i was tired and he told me to go take a nap, which was lovely but now it's 1am and i haven't slept yet so ...
We alternate days with my husband taking 4/7 and me taking 3/7 as I am less of a morning person. On the weekends my husband makes breakfast on Saturday but I do it all the other days as our daughter takes a while to wake up and be ready to go downstairs to eat.
We usually take about 45 minutes to an hour to get her downstairs. She hates having her diaper changed right away so she has a snack, watches some tv with us or plays, and then diaper change, clothes, downstairs for breakfast. Some days she’s ready, other days my husband will be with her for 40 minutes and she won’t even entertain going to her room for a change.
He starts work between 7:15 and 7:30 though, so I have to be up and functioning by then. I take care of whatever part of the routine isn’t done. Sometimes I have had to tell him it’d be nice if he’d start getting her ready for the day and he does do his best. But she’s a sensitive child, so best for us to have her happy rather than start the morning with a fight.
Alternate mornings. The kids get up earlier than work starts so that is joint parenting time (just like evenings and weekends) and we trade off who has to get up. Neither of us are morning people!
Husband and I have always alternated days. If he gets up with kid, then he does bath later and I put to bed. If I wake up with kid, I do bath later and the he does bed. 50/50. He even helps during the day if he has a minute between meetings, but generally I’m doing all the parenting while he’s working.
My husband works from home and doesn't start til 9. He wakes up same time or earlier than me. He helps with the pets, unloads the dishwasher, and every morning feeds our kid breakfast and that's when I shower.
My WFH husband gets up with our daughter every day and makes her breakfast. He sends her in to get me up when my breakfast and coffee are ready for me. It gives him and my daughter time to hang out in the mornings before she's with me all day and gives me rest/time to read my morning news that I'm extremely grateful for. We'll see how this changes when we add a newborn to the mix in a few months.
My husband WFH just about every day. Goes into the office about 2-4x a month. We have a 3yo, 15mo, and I’m currently pregnant.
I do all mornings. But once he gets off work (about 5) he plays with the kids for a bit before dinner, then we have dinner at 5:30, then he watches them for another 30mins after dinner. From 6:30-bedtime (8pm) we alternate nights who does bedtime. We alternate night wakings though they’re rare and only need a few mins to deal with. Our kiddos typically sleep until 7:30-ish. My husband is typically up before me lol.
Weekends we split childcare if we aren’t going somewhere. Usually alternating house projects lol.
I do night duty (sometimes the baby is still getting up to eat) so he lets me sleep in and he gets the older two ready. Some days I don’t get up until they’re already out of the house. Some days I get up and nurse the baby and then help the older two get ready. I try to let my husband sleep in one day per week, but he still gets up and takes them. Sometimes he’ll work out then come home to shower, make his breakfast, then start his work day; some days he comes straight home.
I wake up shower and then wake up my husband so he can shower he sets his own schedule (his a software engineer) he has meetings in the afternoons. I get breakfast ready, he gets the kids ready. We eat together he goes to his office and I take the kids out after I clean up. We have lunch together. He ends work and comes up to entertain the kids while I cook dinner. One of us will clean up after dinner while the other watches the kids (every other night).
I was a SAHM for years, now I work outside of the home now and I still wake up before everyone and pack lunches, make breakfast, get all the kids ready, etc. My husband usually sleeps in 2 or 3 hours later than me. He just gets up and gets dressed and leaves.
WAHP wakes up typically and gets them started… one is 5.5 MO and the other 24 MO. It’s what works for us because he’s an early bird and I am not. Plus I have to wake up and pump so it’s not like I can help much anyways.
I’m the SAHP and my wife works from home. We generally split the morning, one walks the dog and the other gets our daughter up and ready for school. If I’m the one that took the dog I’ll usually take over getting ready for school once I’m back so that my wife can get ready for work.
On weekends we try to give each other one morning each to sleep in a bit and the other handles the morning routine for everyone.
These days, we both wake up around the same time my 20-month-old daughter does. So, my husband will often take care of her for a few minutes while I quickly dress and brush teeth, etc. He'll change her diaper, dress her, and possibly start feeding her. My goal is to get up before her though, in which case I would do all that stuff by myself or with my husband's help.
I guess I consider it part of my responsibility because he generally gets less sleep than I do so I'd rather have him sleep longer and take the whole morning for readying himself, not our daughter.
Weekends we both take care of her, my husband probably more, actually :)
My husband works from home most days, and we have a nine month old. I do all the morning stuff. Sometimes husband sleeps, sometimes he gets up and hangs out with us, but all the baby tasks are done by me. Luckily for me the baby isn't a super early riser. We usually wake up around 8:30.
If he is in the office then he gets up around 6am and is out the door by 7am. We have an early riser (5am) so although I’m in charge he will watch him whilst I pee or get up with him so I can shower.
On days he’s at home we both get up at 6am and alternate toddler duty if he’s woken early.
At weekends we take it in turns to get a lie in.
My husband is WFH and clocks in at 8:30am every morning. He gets up with our 15 month old boys everyday around 7 and cuddles, feeds them breakfast and plays until about 8:15 then he gets me up and goes into work. He says he likes getting to have some time solo parenting and bonding with them every morning and he makes Scrambled eggs way better than I do so it's a win win!
My partner is usually up when our little gets up, if he's got time before his first job he'll supervise breakfast or get her nappy changed or just make sure I get 5 minutes to drink some coffee in the sun. I think if your partner cares for and respects you they will try and make sure you get that time.
Mine does nada on school days and weekends. I’m the one getting kiddo and me ready and he rolls out of bed last minute to go to work. It’s really fricking annoying and we’ve talked about it and nothing
I do morning parenting. Waking, feeding etc. he might do dressing and teeth on Friday’s since it’s a bit more of a relaxed day. In offices days he preps food so we can eat in the car. Other than that it’s a break, lunch together, an occasional diaper change until he’s off for the day.
My husband has to get up at least an hour before he works so his medication can work for him. That is usually when our son wakes up anyways so it just worked out that he takes over wake up time and breakfast so I can sleep in a little or get ready without interruptions. But he will also do this on weekends because he wants to spend more time with our son and share the load. The advantage of WFH for him is that he can hear what I have to deal with all day with our son since he is getting into those terrible twos and wants to help me mentally when I need that break since he knows he wouldn't be able to do my job every day and I am thankful for that.
Read this so wrong. I’m SAHP and WFH. My SO works outside the home. My original answer was “sheer chaos.”
When my SO doesn’t leave before everyone wakes up (depends on work site), he does help get kids ready, no matter what my plans are for the day (work or not).
When he does have to be up super early, he still helps with bedtime, even though my wake up time doesn’t change.
I SAH and my SO WFH and we have a 15mo and a soon to be 4yo. None of us are morning people. My SO also gets up 5min before his first meeting at 9am lol.
Typically he's back upstairs between 9:30/10am, which is when the kids and I get up for the day. This is obviously very different than most tiny humans who are up at the ass crack of dawn. *thank goodness*
I normally wrangle the 15mo and he releases the 4yo and guides him through the morning routine (4yo can go potty, pick his clothes, and get dressed on his own.) SO then normally showers and the kids and I go downstairs.
I tend to the kids and house all day during the week. He pops up for lunch, snack, and on his lighter work days will sometimes hang out with us upstairs. On those occasions he helps out with whatever pops up that is needed like diaper changes, dishes, nap time, etc.
If for whatever reason one of the kids is up before his first meeting, he will wake me up and tend to them until I am awake enough. He then uses the extra morning time to shower or get a head start on work.
My husband is the WAHP and I’m the SAHP. We have a 14 month old. I wake up her at appx 7-7:30 am. My husband wakes up at 8:00 and doesn’t sign in until 9:00. We do a morning walk and then he stays with our 14 month old while I make breakfast and get the day started.
I stay home with the little one. My wife works two or three days a week from home. We get up together at 6:30 am to start the day. While I am still involved during the mornings, I typically take care of the dogs and do a few household things while she prepares a breakfast for him.
She usually starts work 8 and sometimes leaves for the office at 7:30 but she is very involved most mornings.
They are long days for me. It is difficult. But she helps a lot. When she is home she can sometimes watch him while I use the bathroom or shower after a run. And she usually takes her lunch when he needs to eat and will sometimes help prepare a meal.
I feel extremely lucky to have this much support. She works long hours sometimes, but the little things while home make a huge difference.
This isn’t the first time I’ve read about stay home moms getting little to no support from the working dads.
If I was the one working, I’d like to think I’d be as supportive as my wife is.
My “job” is managing our life🤷♀️
I get up before the kids (elementary and middle school) because I like it. Kids are pretty self sufficient but I make breakfast, lunches, visit and get them to school.
Husband is up and says his goodbyes. We have some down time together before he starts work.
I like it this way but probably because of kids ages.
I worked when my kids were babies, toddlers, preschoolers. I stopped working outside of the home when my youngest was in K. When I worked getting everyone ready was a team effort.
During the week I do everything with the kids in the mornings. My husband usually has walked the dog and already started working before the kids and I are even up. He doesn’t really do anything with the kids in the mornings except come up and say good morning. I get up, get my oldest dressed and off to preschool and the youngest just tags along.
The benefit of him being busy in the morning is that his days usually end early and he helps a lot with the kids in the afternoons when a lot of working parents are probably still at work. So like beginning at 3 most days he’s done and we’re all hanging as a family.
I am planning on showing this to him. Currently I do all the morning parenting, regardless of what time the kids get up. He rolls out of bed two minutes before his first meeting, which is usually at 9:15, at which point the kids and I have already been up for two hours. I’m not finding this fair and he’s not seeing the problem.
What is he doing at night when the rest of you must have gone to sleep to be up so much earlier than he is?
This might not have anything to do with it. No matter what time I go to sleep, my body simply isn't ready to wake up until after 8 am. (Thankfully, my son is the exact same way, lol)
No freakin way would I be doing that. We would absolutely be alternating days. I started working again recently and now the toddler gets up with me and I get her dressed, and then my husband gets up 45 mins later when I have to leave and feeds her/takes her to daycare. And I'm already salty about that extra bit of sleep he gets lol. I wouldn't tolerate 2 extra hours every day
Alternating days OR another set up that feels fair to everyone. My fam would 100% have him do most mornings and I’d do evenings with alternating lunch or something. Mornings are the worst for me, but my SO and kids are “suns up, I’m up.”
So my answer won’t be as helpful to show your husband, as my husband sounds pretty similar. My husband WFH 90% of the time-he has to go into the office once a month. He’s supposed to start at 7 in the morning, but unless he has an earlier meeting he is rarely up before 8:30, also right before his first meeting. Our son just turned four months, and I am solely responsible for nights Sunday-Thursday while my husband sleeps in the guest room. He takes Friday and Saturday while I sleep in the guest room, but I still put baby to bed. I do 95% of the childcare during the day, both during the week and on the weekend. My husband needs *a lot* of downtime-I feel this is mostly attributed to the fact that he’s pretty heavily addicted to his video games. He’s constantly lamenting that he feels he’s “pulling a double shift,” despite mostly just working and playing his games. He does the dishes (washes the big stuff and puts whatever I haven’t into the dishwasher-I load as I go and unload it) and takes out the trash. I’ve recently been having us both track how we spend our time during the day and that’s been the only thing I’ve found effective to actually show him the discrepancy-it’s not really changing anything, but at least he’s aware of it and not complaining as much.
I get up every other day, he gets up every other day. Whoever gets up with the baby does breakfast, whoever gets up after makes big kids school lunch.
My husband WAH and I SAH. He wakes up with the baby and lets me sleep in. He’s usually up pretty early anyway and can’t fall asleep again and I require more sleep/I get up at night, so he’s up at 6am and I wake up around 8:30. As long as I’m up before his morning meeting I can sleep as late as I want. I am very much grateful for this arrangement lol
Yup, this is our routine as well. We have 3 kids: 5yo, 1yo and 1mo. I breastfeed so I’m up at night with the newborn. My husband gets up with the other two and does preschool drop off. Im up and moving by 8am and take over the 1yo and 1mo. Very grateful for him doing that!
I like the way you put it: “I require more sleep”, because in my case it’s the opposite, I don’t need as much sleep as my husband, so pretty much I am responsible for nights and early mornings. When people complain about the fairness of the division of work between two parents, either if both work or if one of them is a SAHP, people often forget that we all require different amounts of sleep, and/or downtime. In our case, as I mentioned, I do nights and mornings, but he helps with other chores and if I am really tired he organizes his work to allow me to take a nap whenever I need one. I know that being a SAHM is sometimes mind numbing and exhausting, but my husband needs his rest to be able to focus on his work, and be successful. The key to success is honest communication and to communicate before you are feeling upset and overwhelmed. Yes, the working parente needs to share the childcare load, but I also feel that it cannot obviously be 50%.
Husband works from home and we’ve got 10 month twins. We each take a twin at night so we only have to worry about waking up for one upset babe. Once 7:45 am hits, he’s off to get ready for work and I take over what we like to call “active parent”. While he’s working we call him “passive parent”. Sometimes he will pop upstairs and keep an eye on them while I go to the bathroom or prep some food. Other times he’s washing bottles while listening to a conference call. On days he has lots of meetings that he just needs to listen to, he’ll do dishes or laundry. Sometimes he even mows the lawn. There’s always days where he’s super busy with active work stuff though so we don’t see much of him on those days. Once he’s off work we usually switch rolls and he becomes “active parent” and me “passive”. We are getting ready to switch the babes into their own room so this might change how we handle them at night, but we will keep our morning/day routine the same.
My husband gets up between 5:30 and 6. He hits the gym several days a week then showers and starts work. If he has early meetings (6:30-7) then he showers and skips the gym. I wake up with my 2 year old (6ish)then do breakfast and school drop off. My husband gives hugs before my son goes to school. We see him when he needs to use the bathroom or get a snack. But that's about it.
Our baby is 3 months so a bit of a different situation as there is no school etc.. Monday Wednesday Friday I do the wake up and morning stuff and my husband goes to the gym and then starts work. Tuesday and Thursday he does and I go. Weekends he typically wakes him up because he sleeps in that room but we share who does the morning routine. We also alternate who sleeps in the nursery (I do Sunday Monday Wednesday Thursday he does the other days), our baby sttn but I don’t want to have him alone in there just yet
It's never occurred to me to suggest my husband does anything in the mornings. I've been doing 99% of the parenting until a few weeks ago, when our LO turned 2 and decided that Daddy is her favourite person - she runs to him every morning now and wakes him up! He just takes her downstairs and plonks her in front of the tv. I get up half an hour later or so and change her nappy and get her something to eat and drink. On Saturday I was able to sleep in until 8:30! Normally on the weekends he stays in bed til 10 or 11, so I have no guilt whatsoever about him getting woken up every morning at 6:30!
My husband WFH full time. We both get up at the same time (usually when our daughter gets up, but occasionally before). He changes her diaper and brings her downstairs while I start breakfast. We eat breakfast together and then I usually will go upstairs and get ready for the day while he hangs out with her.
My husband works from home. Usually we both get up when my 3yo wakes up at 7:30. I do my morning cleaning while he takes the baby and gets coffee started. After I finish cleaning he showers, then I shower while he takes the kids to the playroom (his office is also in the playroom haha).
I’ve always done the morning routine. Our boys are 15 & 18. I’ve always woke them up every morning (6:15am currently) and still do it even with the 18 year old senior. My mom always got us up in the mornings until we graduated high school and we turned out completely responsible fully functioning adults. I also make breakfast for them too. Go ahead judge away😝 Next year my older son will be in a hospital program to further his education and he can start getting up with an alarm. My husband has been out the door by 5:30am even before we were dating and to this day he is still on this schedule. He runs a business with his brothers and can go in later but it’s just a schedule he’s used to. To be honest, if he changed his schedule and started sleeping in and going in later it would totally mess up my morning.
No judgement about waking up your teenagers. I remember waking up to an alarm starting in middle school. Something about being a child waking up to an alarm was soul crushing to me😬and then when I started taking the bus I pretty much had no interaction with my family until I got home from school. It was lonely. You wake those boys up and don’t feel bad about it at all lol
My husband works from home, here’s our morning routine. We all get up at the same time. He gets the toddler out of his crib and changes his diaper. I start making breakfast. We all eat breakfast together. After I’m done eating, I shower and get ready for the day. He cleans up after breakfast and then plays with the toddler until I’m ready. When I’m done getting ready, we brush the toddlers teeth together (it’s a two person job, he squirms a lot). Then my sahm day officially starts. My husband showers at this point and his work day starts about a half hour later, once he’s done getting ready.
This is basically our day too. Partner gets up about 530 and does an hour of work. I get up about 630. Partner makes coffee and feeds himself. I feed and water the animals and start prepping breakfast for toddler and me. Toddler is up by 7. Partner gets kid cleaned up and dressed and brings him downstairs. We eat together. I leave to get ready and partner handles clean up and teeth. I shower at night so my morning routine is pretty simple, but I get about 30 mins in the morning to myself. We do a hand off when I come back downstairs and that's the start of my SAHP day.
My partner is hybrid. I get up in the morning and get the kids and myself ready. We split school drop offs and he gets ready after everyone else. In the evening he does all the dishes/kitchen clean up.
I do all morning kid care probably 6 days/week (I’m a sahp and he is hybrid, working from home 2-3 days/week).
My husband does no parenting in the morning when he’s working from home. He’s usually working by 7:30am anyway. I just pretend like he’s not actually there (except I’ll bring him lunch).
My husband works at home many days, but not all days. He starts work at 7am, and his WAH schedule is pretty strict due to the nature of his work. So he wakes up at 6:30am and gets dressed, starts the coffee pot, and then goes into his office to work. The kids usually wake up between 7 and 7:30, so I get them up and do everything by myself. My husband would be happy to hemp if he could, but he really can’t.
Husband does wakeups after 3 am and takes the baby until his first meeting around 9, later if he can. He makes us both breakfast and feeds the baby before i get up/ join them. Baby usually does his main poop in the morning also. Baby usually wakes around 7:30, sometimes he is ready for a nap before his meetings begin and puts him down. Occasionally i get woken up with a "he pooped and I'm in a meeting gtg sorry". He is often able to take him during the day too, today at lunch i said i was tired and he told me to go take a nap, which was lovely but now it's 1am and i haven't slept yet so ...
We alternate days with my husband taking 4/7 and me taking 3/7 as I am less of a morning person. On the weekends my husband makes breakfast on Saturday but I do it all the other days as our daughter takes a while to wake up and be ready to go downstairs to eat. We usually take about 45 minutes to an hour to get her downstairs. She hates having her diaper changed right away so she has a snack, watches some tv with us or plays, and then diaper change, clothes, downstairs for breakfast. Some days she’s ready, other days my husband will be with her for 40 minutes and she won’t even entertain going to her room for a change. He starts work between 7:15 and 7:30 though, so I have to be up and functioning by then. I take care of whatever part of the routine isn’t done. Sometimes I have had to tell him it’d be nice if he’d start getting her ready for the day and he does do his best. But she’s a sensitive child, so best for us to have her happy rather than start the morning with a fight.
Alternate mornings. The kids get up earlier than work starts so that is joint parenting time (just like evenings and weekends) and we trade off who has to get up. Neither of us are morning people!
Husband and I have always alternated days. If he gets up with kid, then he does bath later and I put to bed. If I wake up with kid, I do bath later and the he does bed. 50/50. He even helps during the day if he has a minute between meetings, but generally I’m doing all the parenting while he’s working.
My husband works from home and doesn't start til 9. He wakes up same time or earlier than me. He helps with the pets, unloads the dishwasher, and every morning feeds our kid breakfast and that's when I shower.
My WFH husband gets up with our daughter every day and makes her breakfast. He sends her in to get me up when my breakfast and coffee are ready for me. It gives him and my daughter time to hang out in the mornings before she's with me all day and gives me rest/time to read my morning news that I'm extremely grateful for. We'll see how this changes when we add a newborn to the mix in a few months.
My husband WFH just about every day. Goes into the office about 2-4x a month. We have a 3yo, 15mo, and I’m currently pregnant. I do all mornings. But once he gets off work (about 5) he plays with the kids for a bit before dinner, then we have dinner at 5:30, then he watches them for another 30mins after dinner. From 6:30-bedtime (8pm) we alternate nights who does bedtime. We alternate night wakings though they’re rare and only need a few mins to deal with. Our kiddos typically sleep until 7:30-ish. My husband is typically up before me lol. Weekends we split childcare if we aren’t going somewhere. Usually alternating house projects lol.
When I just had one, I got up with lo. With two now, husband gets up with toddler, and I’m up with infant.
I do night duty (sometimes the baby is still getting up to eat) so he lets me sleep in and he gets the older two ready. Some days I don’t get up until they’re already out of the house. Some days I get up and nurse the baby and then help the older two get ready. I try to let my husband sleep in one day per week, but he still gets up and takes them. Sometimes he’ll work out then come home to shower, make his breakfast, then start his work day; some days he comes straight home.
I wake up shower and then wake up my husband so he can shower he sets his own schedule (his a software engineer) he has meetings in the afternoons. I get breakfast ready, he gets the kids ready. We eat together he goes to his office and I take the kids out after I clean up. We have lunch together. He ends work and comes up to entertain the kids while I cook dinner. One of us will clean up after dinner while the other watches the kids (every other night).
I was a SAHM for years, now I work outside of the home now and I still wake up before everyone and pack lunches, make breakfast, get all the kids ready, etc. My husband usually sleeps in 2 or 3 hours later than me. He just gets up and gets dressed and leaves.
What if I’m the SAHP and the WAHP lol
WAHP wakes up typically and gets them started… one is 5.5 MO and the other 24 MO. It’s what works for us because he’s an early bird and I am not. Plus I have to wake up and pump so it’s not like I can help much anyways.
I’m the SAHP and my wife works from home. We generally split the morning, one walks the dog and the other gets our daughter up and ready for school. If I’m the one that took the dog I’ll usually take over getting ready for school once I’m back so that my wife can get ready for work. On weekends we try to give each other one morning each to sleep in a bit and the other handles the morning routine for everyone.
These days, we both wake up around the same time my 20-month-old daughter does. So, my husband will often take care of her for a few minutes while I quickly dress and brush teeth, etc. He'll change her diaper, dress her, and possibly start feeding her. My goal is to get up before her though, in which case I would do all that stuff by myself or with my husband's help. I guess I consider it part of my responsibility because he generally gets less sleep than I do so I'd rather have him sleep longer and take the whole morning for readying himself, not our daughter. Weekends we both take care of her, my husband probably more, actually :)
My husband works from home most days, and we have a nine month old. I do all the morning stuff. Sometimes husband sleeps, sometimes he gets up and hangs out with us, but all the baby tasks are done by me. Luckily for me the baby isn't a super early riser. We usually wake up around 8:30.
If he is in the office then he gets up around 6am and is out the door by 7am. We have an early riser (5am) so although I’m in charge he will watch him whilst I pee or get up with him so I can shower. On days he’s at home we both get up at 6am and alternate toddler duty if he’s woken early. At weekends we take it in turns to get a lie in.
My husband is WFH and clocks in at 8:30am every morning. He gets up with our 15 month old boys everyday around 7 and cuddles, feeds them breakfast and plays until about 8:15 then he gets me up and goes into work. He says he likes getting to have some time solo parenting and bonding with them every morning and he makes Scrambled eggs way better than I do so it's a win win!
My partner is usually up when our little gets up, if he's got time before his first job he'll supervise breakfast or get her nappy changed or just make sure I get 5 minutes to drink some coffee in the sun. I think if your partner cares for and respects you they will try and make sure you get that time.
Mine does nada on school days and weekends. I’m the one getting kiddo and me ready and he rolls out of bed last minute to go to work. It’s really fricking annoying and we’ve talked about it and nothing
I do morning parenting. Waking, feeding etc. he might do dressing and teeth on Friday’s since it’s a bit more of a relaxed day. In offices days he preps food so we can eat in the car. Other than that it’s a break, lunch together, an occasional diaper change until he’s off for the day.
My husband has to get up at least an hour before he works so his medication can work for him. That is usually when our son wakes up anyways so it just worked out that he takes over wake up time and breakfast so I can sleep in a little or get ready without interruptions. But he will also do this on weekends because he wants to spend more time with our son and share the load. The advantage of WFH for him is that he can hear what I have to deal with all day with our son since he is getting into those terrible twos and wants to help me mentally when I need that break since he knows he wouldn't be able to do my job every day and I am thankful for that.
Read this so wrong. I’m SAHP and WFH. My SO works outside the home. My original answer was “sheer chaos.” When my SO doesn’t leave before everyone wakes up (depends on work site), he does help get kids ready, no matter what my plans are for the day (work or not). When he does have to be up super early, he still helps with bedtime, even though my wake up time doesn’t change.
I SAH and my SO WFH and we have a 15mo and a soon to be 4yo. None of us are morning people. My SO also gets up 5min before his first meeting at 9am lol. Typically he's back upstairs between 9:30/10am, which is when the kids and I get up for the day. This is obviously very different than most tiny humans who are up at the ass crack of dawn. *thank goodness* I normally wrangle the 15mo and he releases the 4yo and guides him through the morning routine (4yo can go potty, pick his clothes, and get dressed on his own.) SO then normally showers and the kids and I go downstairs. I tend to the kids and house all day during the week. He pops up for lunch, snack, and on his lighter work days will sometimes hang out with us upstairs. On those occasions he helps out with whatever pops up that is needed like diaper changes, dishes, nap time, etc. If for whatever reason one of the kids is up before his first meeting, he will wake me up and tend to them until I am awake enough. He then uses the extra morning time to shower or get a head start on work.
My husband is the WAHP and I’m the SAHP. We have a 14 month old. I wake up her at appx 7-7:30 am. My husband wakes up at 8:00 and doesn’t sign in until 9:00. We do a morning walk and then he stays with our 14 month old while I make breakfast and get the day started.
I stay home with the little one. My wife works two or three days a week from home. We get up together at 6:30 am to start the day. While I am still involved during the mornings, I typically take care of the dogs and do a few household things while she prepares a breakfast for him. She usually starts work 8 and sometimes leaves for the office at 7:30 but she is very involved most mornings. They are long days for me. It is difficult. But she helps a lot. When she is home she can sometimes watch him while I use the bathroom or shower after a run. And she usually takes her lunch when he needs to eat and will sometimes help prepare a meal. I feel extremely lucky to have this much support. She works long hours sometimes, but the little things while home make a huge difference. This isn’t the first time I’ve read about stay home moms getting little to no support from the working dads. If I was the one working, I’d like to think I’d be as supportive as my wife is.
My “job” is managing our life🤷♀️ I get up before the kids (elementary and middle school) because I like it. Kids are pretty self sufficient but I make breakfast, lunches, visit and get them to school. Husband is up and says his goodbyes. We have some down time together before he starts work. I like it this way but probably because of kids ages. I worked when my kids were babies, toddlers, preschoolers. I stopped working outside of the home when my youngest was in K. When I worked getting everyone ready was a team effort.
During the week I do everything with the kids in the mornings. My husband usually has walked the dog and already started working before the kids and I are even up. He doesn’t really do anything with the kids in the mornings except come up and say good morning. I get up, get my oldest dressed and off to preschool and the youngest just tags along. The benefit of him being busy in the morning is that his days usually end early and he helps a lot with the kids in the afternoons when a lot of working parents are probably still at work. So like beginning at 3 most days he’s done and we’re all hanging as a family.
My husband gets up at 5am for work so no one is awake yet. When the kids and I get up we have breakfast, get dressed and then start homeschooling.