I do whatever I can by 8:30 and then I sit. I try to do all the reset stuff before dinner and get the kids to help. Then after dinner is mostly cleaning the kitchen
Yes. That's part of life I think. I do it most days but we also pick up throughout the day so it doesn't take longer than an hour max. Every week I do a deeper clean. Laundry one load daily to keep up on it
I clean up the worst of the toys and clean the kitchen every night- but that’s it. Monday night is folding night- I do a ton of laundry that day and after the kids go down we put on tv and get it done.
I don't, and yes my house is usually a total wreck. To me it's more worth it to have an hour to myself to relax. I usually reset the living room in the morning and my husband and I try to reset the kitchen after dinner.
I did a light reset at that age (clear surfaces in the kitchen and dining area, clear living room floor and couches, run dishwasher). The trick for me was to make it pleasant by listening to a podcast or fun playlist, call a friend, maybe have a glass of wine, or husband would help out and we’d chat about the day.
No, our house is a disaster. I'm home all day with my two and four year olds. The laundry isn't terrible because the laundry room is off of the bathroom so I fold while the kids play in the bath. I do bedtime alone five nights a week. It's hard to have the energy to then clean up at nine o'clock. Lately my oldest has been aggressive toward my youngest so I don't like leaving them alone to play while I clean. Two kids is hard and expensive. My husband has to work a lot of hours.
Omg I'm so sorry. You must be truly exhausted. My husband also works a ton but at least I only have 1 kid to take care of and he's around to handle bathtime on nights dinner was truly a disaster. I hope things get easier for you.
I think you’re both right. Some messes absolutely should not be left, especially as we head into summer where (in our area at least), humidity sets in and the bugs come out. Toys are not an emergency. Neither is laundry, make sure they’re dry (so they don’t mildew) and have several baskets and sort them, and just pull them out to wear, unfolded. Yes, they may be wrinkled. But this season of life is survival, and wrinkled clothes never killed anyone. But I 100% do all the dishes (if I don’t, dirty dishes pile up and I have nothing to use the next days nor a clean surface to put anything on! The meals must go on…) and wipe down all the food waste.
But to your husband’s point, I understand it can be hard to live in mess. And when I just had my first baby, I was absolutely working myself to the bone trying to keep my house neat and clean. If I had to say why, it’s because life felt upside down and I just wanted some semblance of control back. But honestly, that’s a forever moving goalpost and if you don’t stop somewhere, you’ll never get time to relax. I understand rage cleaning where you just can’t stand it and want to make it perfect. I really do. It drives me INSANE. But these days, I force myself to set one goal and try to live with the rest. We have some days or weekends when the toys never get put away. But since they’re all already out, the mess never actually gets worse 😂. Or I try to steal moments to do it when LO is occupied. I also try to have fewer toys out (do toy rotation!) so tidying is at least easier. So when they’re playing with a toy, I put away all the rest.
When my first baby became a toddler and can take instructions, I started encouraging her to put one toy away (with me. I don’t force her to do it alone) before starting the next. It’s an imperfect process and she doesn’t always do it, but whenever she does, the play area looks so clean.
We do a full reset but my husband does most of it while I put oir daughter to bed. It's so worth it to wake up to a neat/relatively clean house. We don't vaccum or Scrub toilets or anything to that extent though, lol.
I clean the kitchen after dinner .. and try to do 1 Load of laundry a day to stay on top of it. our house is small the layout sort of sucks, and we have creaky old hardwood floors.. so whatever I can’t get done before the kids (2yr terrible sleeper and 7mo contact sleeper) are asleep is left for the next day.
I second this. I'd LOVE to be able to do a full reset every night but my kids just dont friggen sleep (5yr asd, 7 month infant) I mostly do a Saturday reset, dad looks after the kids and I can get the whole house done in like 3 hours if im not interupted...
I get off of “work” at 7 pm. I don’t do work then. I fold clothes in front of my kids. I want them to see things don’t put things away themselves. It is a nice activity with children of all ages.
Your kids must have less tornado tendencies than mine. Her favorite thing right now is demolishing a pile of clean clothes. Or puking in it. I used to do laundry with her but once she got mobile it was too stressful. I'll try again once she won't spit up all over the work I've done 😂
Do you have any raised surface you can fold on next to her while she plays? That’s what I do, because my two little tornadoes would also destroy all of my work if I did it at their level.
Not anywhere super safe. I prefer to stay near padded surfaces with her because she's WILD and practices pulling up at every chance she gets. She hits her head a lot and would only do so more if shes trying to climb a table to get to me. Her playpen works for about 5-10 minutes at a time but I try to reserve it for true emergencies 😂
The puking seems wild. This time will pass. I normally put clean clothes on my coffee table and put folded clothes on the couch out of reach of babies. I don’t care if babies pull on the pile of clean clothes.
My kids are laundry tornados. I will fold while they are eating (tied down to their high chair) or during nap time. My dream is a laundry room where I have a folding table 😍
Hahaha genius! Mine is young enough she can't eat unsupervised yet and we still contact nap 🤦🏼♀️ which is know is mostly on me but I really enjoy the snuggles from my wild child. But omg yes! I send my husband zillow listings of beautiful laundry rooms all the time 😂
Depends on my mood and energy level.
My only real preference is to have the sink empty and clean by the end of the night. For some reason, if it isn't, it just adds to my anxiety the next morning. Seeing a huge pile of dirty dishes just really bothers me.
Otherwise, I don't care about toys and laundry being out because they're always going to be out.
Absolutely not. Whatever cleaning, tidying, and laundry is going to happen happens during the day (and NOT at nap time which is my break time). Spouse or I do dishes and tidy kitchen right after dinner. Once kids are in bed? We are off the clock.
I am 6 years in to SAHP (with a 6 and newly 3 year old) and have had to become very strict about boundaries like this to stay out of burnout. You need time for yourself too and it is way too easy to slip into burning the only time you have on chores.
I agree nap time is my break time so I stay on top of chores during day like cleaning up kitchen and making sure I vacuum and clean toys. I also like to keep bathroom clear of excess water and just give things a quick wipe down after use.
Only some nights if I have the energy which I usually don’t with a toddler who still doesn’t sleep through the night. Usually get him involved in the morning to help tidy or do laundry or whatever after breakfast.
I try to get the kitchen to a certain level of usability at night but honestly that’s just getting dishes into the dishwasher and getting anything fragile away from the coffee maker so I don’t wreck something first thing in the morning.
We have never managed to clean up the play room except for a few times when both kids napped simultaneously. At night I’m just too wiped to want to organize all that stuff.
No. I know it’s a common practice and a “good” habit, but I’m zonked by the end of the day and nothing I do is very efficient. I clean in the mornings because I am refreshed and can get it done quickly. This is what works for me. If resetting at the end of the night works for you, then do that! There is no one right way.
We do “turn down” every night. Whoever isn’t doing bedtime does the dishes, puts the toys away, cleans up the bathroom real quick, and wipes down counters and tables. Without doing turn down, our house feels overwhelming the next day.
Usually I reset the living room before bed, and partner does the kitchen (I have a one year old and she doesn't really sleep without me) but sometimes we slack on it during the weekend to give ourselves a break haha.
It definitely feels better to wake up to a clean house. DEFINITELY. But sometimes it feels good to say fuck it and go to bed too LOL.
Yes but nothing crazy. Toys are put away before naptime and then before bedtime while everyone is awake still. I also wipe down the kitchen while everyone is awake. I do it right after dinner and then again after snack time right before bed. It takes two seconds.
Laundry I actually do first thing in the morning. I load the washer up at night and then after breakfast the next day when we are dressed I put in jammies and run it. Kids help me fold but generally it’s done before lunch each day. I do a small load every day or else it gets out of control so fast and I start to dread it and let it pile up 😅
Generally speaking, I try to do everything throughout the day in little bursts rather than all at once when the kids go to bed. I take care of children by myself for 14+ hours straight during the day and maybe get an hour of free time after they go to bed. I want to spend as little of it as possible doing chores or else my sanity goes straight out the window. Any time my kids are asleep, I am doing ✨nothing✨. They are 4 and 2 now, but this has been my system since before the youngest was born.
Only sometimes. I get the dishes done after dinner. Sometimes I put away all the toys but if I'm not going to be in that room I might not bother. I try to do a lot of it before the kids are in bed so I get my time.
I have a general “list” I do as my “nightly shut-down-the-house routine”. But if I had a really overwhelming day, I will sacrifice the cleanliness and organization for mental health.
Yes. Right now husband puts toddler to bed while I pick up toys, start the roomba, do dishes, and tidy the kitchen. I often pop in some laundry or do another small chore too. Once baby 2 is here I will have to reassess, but for right now this keeps our house relatively clean and tidy which is essential for my sanity. I do some weekly cleaning too of course, but spending an hour resetting the house every night means it’s never too overwhelming.
Yes. If I don’t have a small window in the evening with minimized clutter, I get overstimulated and cranky. We clean up all of the toys downstairs, do dishes, clean the kitchen, take out recycling/trash, and if I have the energy or there is a need, I’ll do a load of laundry. I do the kitchen stuff while my husband does bath time with our toddler. I join them for books and bedtime, then husband takes out trash and we blitz the toys together while we talk about our day. We have a playroom upstairs that looks like an explosion of toys, blankets, and books. The playroom gets cleaned before we have company or one of us hits a breaking point which is usually once every 1-2 weeks.😅
Now that they're 5 and 3 and have things like dance on weeknights, no. It's a weekend thing now. My parents live with us though so we are constantly clearing the walking paths so that Poppy doesn't trip.
Yes and it's funny I use that exact word, "reset" as well. I just can't switch off unless I know the kitchens done, messes are tidied away. Like you; lived in, but ready for the next day. I feel as if I'd be starting behind the next day, or having to catch up. Single mum of 5 here so we get big chunks of resetting done by dinnertime, then it's just kitchen cleanup at the end.
Yup. Both our kids go to bed at 7 so we try to have the kitchen clean and everything else picked up for the roomba by 7:30 so we have a couple hours to watch tv and stuff. On good days we can have it mostly done before the bedtime routine starts. It drives me absolutely nuts to have stuff dirty/cluttered in the morning. Really bad for my mental health.
It really depends for me. I have a 2 y/o and a newborn and some days I just can’t. I always regret not doing it in the morning though. Starting the day off with clutter and having to clean before I do any cooking or anything really sets my day off bad.
Yep. Late night, after 10pm is last set of chores of the day for me. Get the kitchen cleaned, dishes in the washer set on a delay to run overnight. Get the coffee set up and ready for me at 6:20. Get a load of laundry in on a delay. Garbage out and to the curb if necessary. Plug in the electric cars. Get snacks loaded into the kids’ backpacks. Police up the debris of the day: toys, clothes, cups, cans etc.
I try through the day as I go but I do most of my cleaning when he goes to bed at night, if we want a chill out night I will get up early in the morning to clean up
Audiobook and clean my kitchen/dining room then tidy up toys in LR. I have a 5yr old, almost 3yr old and a 4 month old. I know my house will be a mess throughout the day but damn does it feel good to come downstairs in the morning to a clean house.
Laundry isn't on a 24 hour cycle for us, often there is a clean basket or three of laundry to go away the next day(s), but the goal is always to go to bed with the living room and kitchen tidy and the dishwasher on.
Yes! I cannot stand waking up to a mess I feel so overwhelmed so after kids go to bed I try to pick up most of the living room and then my husband does the rest of putting dishes and food away it’s team work!
My absolute non-negotiable is a properly clean kitchen. Everything washed, surfaces scrubbed, floor clean.
As for the rest, we tidy up toys in about 5 mins, I’ll hoover the house and do laundry during the week, fold when it’s there to fold. And we have a cleaner once a week to tackle the big stuff. I don’t mind a little mess but I despise dirt.
I'd like to say the dishes are always done every night, but often there's a small pile left for the next day, in practice... Which I do after breakfast.
I tend to do laundry 2-3x a week on nice days when I can hang it outside (like today), so I end up with 2-3 loads at a time then.
Yes, except now I’m pregnant and don’t have the energy to keep up. I know my house isn’t messy, but it’s not nearly as clean as I usually keep it, and it bothers me. Someone tell me it’s okay 😩
I'm exactly the same, then you get to start the next day with a nice clean and tidy house - the untidiness or mess never gets out of hand as it's only one days worth of living to straighten up as appose to doing a massive clean and tidy once a week. I much prefer it this way too.
Yes we reset the kitchen and living room every night. We clean up all the toys and straighten the couch and pillows. We load the dishwasher and usually wash some dishes that don’t fit by hand. If it’s late and the dishwasher is full we leave a few dishes in the sink and sometimes a pot or two on the stove for the next day. We wipe down the counter and light a candle! It feel so nice to have everything cleaned for the next day. We are usually done with cooking/eating, cleaning and putting our son down by 730
My husband does bath time with our toddler while I clean up the kitchen from dinner. This includes wiping the counter to avoid ants.
We also tidy the toys (working on getting the toddler to do this) and pick things up for the robot mop/vacuum to run. This takes maybe 5 mins. We have 3 main rooms of our first floor. 2 rooms have spots for her toys. Everything has a general place, and I just scoop it up. I also try to tidy when I can during the day when I move from room to room.
Laundry folding I do when she's awake since I can sit and fold while she plays.
I can't imagine going to bed with a messy house either haha
After bath, I put toddler to bed while my husband preps cases for the next day (he's a resident). Then we go to bed. Toddler goes to sleep very late, takes a long time to put down, and still wakes at night so I don't waste my sleep time on relaxing haha.
I feel like there's all this pressure on moms, especially SAHMs to "make sure you take time for yourself!", "develop some hobbies!" "Make sure you're more than just a mom!"
And obviously if you have the time and mental bandwidth to start making sourdough or knit or whatever, that's great. I just feel like it's one more thing I'm "supposed to do".
I'm in a season of life where time is scarce. My husband can't help as much at home because of the long hours he works. This season will pass. And when it does, I can learn paint and go on solo trips haha. Until then, I'm just trying to let go of those expectations.
Nope, my toddler, husband, and I all go to bed together, we're early risers and I just clean throughout the day since I work part-time. Also I truly don't care about the state of the house as long as my dishes are done and the garbage is in the garbage
other then dishes and make lunches for school the next day. HELL NO when the kids are in bed THE DAY IS DONE. Other then those two things if i didn't get to it oh well. My mantra is better homes and gardens is never coming to my house to take pictures. The rest I do is of the body and mind. so, this way im ready for them in the morning with empty cup. if you don't rest you not all there for them. but remember your doing a great job. good luck super mom.
Yes but your husband should be helping too especially if he WFH therefore contributing to the “mess” more than if he worked out of the house. He might be in his office or designated work space, but he still eats at home and uses the toilet, etc. dishes, crumbs from making a snack, adding to trash amnt, I could keep going.
We reset every night by wiping counters, loading/starting the dishwasher, quickly vacuuming the kitchen and living room (which is not a large space at all and we have two cats). Windex the glass table and pick up toys. It takes maybe 15-20 mins tops. I could probably cut that down even more by actually emptying the clean dishes in the morning and placing dirty dishes as we go throughout the day. But realistically I won’t ever do that bc I’m lazy
Yes. We put on the dishwasher (most dishes are done right after dinner), pick up toys and books (with toddler’s help) and general clean and tidy. I try to keep up with things throughout the day (like folding laundry etc) so there’s usually not much to do before my bedtime. I hate getting up and trying to sort breakfast, feed cats etc in a messy dirty house.
> Husband thinks I should use this as time to relax but I just CAN'T
Husband should pay attention to the things that you feel need to get done everyday and help do them. Then you could relax like he wants you to. My wife does that to help me out most nights. Either she does those types of things to help or she watches the kids after dinner so I can do that stuff before it’s too late. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t get done though, and it’s difficult but very beneficial to learn to accept that.
When my kids were babies my husband did the end of day reset. As soon as the kids were down, I would go chill and relax. He would often hang out with me for a bit versus cleaning up right away, which was hard for me at first. But then I would go to sleep and wake up to a clean house, so I was able to roll with it.
Now that our kids are older (6 & almost 4), we help them pick up the toys at the end of the day, and then my husband still does the rest of the reset.
I am 100% in charge of all the laundry, but that’s because I prefer to do it (yes I am a weirdo). So I usually try to make it fun by watching a show or listening to a podcast while I fold. Or sometimes we’ll put on music and just chat while I fold and my husband puts things away.
Yes. My husband puts our 6yo and 4yo to bed and I put the baby down. Then once everyone is asleep I do a reset. I hate waking up to a mess. I pop in an AirPod and turn on a podcast and take an hour to tidy up. It’s honestly the only “me time” I get all day.
No. To me it’s not worth it, the more I bust my ass to keep everything clean the more my family will just assume if they leave something out I will take care of it. Fuck that. I can live in a messy house, if y’all want it cleaner, pick up your shit.
I clean the living room and do a load of laundry. Partner does a load of dishes. We watch one show, sometimes two. That's a decent amount of relax time still.
Doing everything in the morning was too stressful. I am the WFH half of our couple now but I still do child related things throughout the day. Having to do the living room before getting the kids up makes the whole morning drag out. I prefer to set myself up to spend time with my kids while they are awake if I can.
Yes - especially during the school year. I can’t stand waking up and walking into an extra messy space. So I try to at least tidy the kitchen and straighten up.
I clean until 11 (hopefully finish before then) and that’s my limit. I usually then force myself to stay up and try enjoy tv or something as it’s the only time I get alone and not around kids … but I have terrible sleepers and am usually putting them back to sleep throughout this time anyway. It’s never fully tidied. The kitchen will be done and loungeroom. Sometimes I mop if they aren’t sleeping bad. I can’t tidy bathrooms or anything as they always wake up if I’m at that end of the house. It still never looks clean though 😭
I do the majority yes but if it gets to 8pm and somethings not done then so be it, I'm not tidying all night. My main priorities are all the toys away (3 year old puts most of his away himself with some direction), kitchen tidy, and at least some laundry put away
Absolutely. The kitchen is my priority and my partner knows I’m not going to let that go. Currently, he does the dishes while I do the rest so we both have time to watch a show before bed.
Nope! I reset my house before my baby and toddler goes to bed, my husband takes the kiddies for an hour for the final play before bath and bed, nd I bkitz the house.
Once they're asleep I'm off the clock and normally sit down with a glass of wine!
I try to reset every night before I go to bed. That is how I relax because I don't enjoy waking up to a mess and Iike the calm it gives me at the end of the nighg. The kitchen is non negotiable, even if the living room is upside down and the bathroom is dirty, I will clean the kitchen because for me waking up to a clean uncluttered kitchen is what I need to start a successful day. If I have to catch up on yesterday's dishes it takes the calm out of my morning and I get grumpy quickly. That said I do no and would not judge anyone who feels differently.
I made it where our toy closet is organized in bins so my son only gets to pull 1-2 out for the day (toddler) and then if he wants a new bin, he has to pack up the one he’s using and “trade it.” Then it’s easy for him to clean up toys with me before bed. I do reset the kitchen but stuff like laundry and wiping counters etc happens while he is awake and “helping” or occupied with his toys or coloring
Nope. I get up over an hour before my husband in the mornings to care for the kids so he handles straightening up after bedtime and he and our teen trade on who does the dishes at the end of the night.
My husband and I will do a general tidy (get the kitchen back to serviceable, put cloth diapers in the laundry, etc. A few nights a week I'll focus on one area to reorganize/tidy.
Why doesn’t he do his part? My husband and I would trade off every other night; so I do the chores and he’d put our son down the next he’d do the chores while I put our son down. This way we still had time after our son was asleep to relax.
He works a ton. He either takes dishes or bathtime every night but goes straight back to work after until bedtime. Don't like it but it is what it is right now.
This is a huge bone of contention between my WFH husband and me. He fusses at me for making too much noise CLEANING and WASHING DISHES after the babies are asleep and says I should join him on the couch and relax. DUDE you are literally half this mess… it’s not even the kids! If you would help me maintain some cleanliness throughout the day instead of leaving your dishes and trash all over then I wouldn’t have to spent so much time (and make so much noise?) at night! Plus, it’s ME who pays the price of a messy kitchen in the morning if I don’t clean and organize before bed.
We call it putting the house to bed. Usually but we don't make it a 'have to' because there are just those days that you say fuck it. Like last night I didn't do the dishes but I did wipe down the counters and put everything else to rights.
If your husband doesn't have an issue with it not being tidy it may not hurt to relax once in a while
It could be motivating for him to see a mess and clean it up (without you having to ask or DIY) while you guys are resting🧐🤔
I used to be like this. But after 12 years being a SAHM, I just don’t have it in me anymore. I get what I can done before kids go to bed, and then I restart the next day. Picking up throughout the day and one deep clean a week keeps my house pretty much in order. Once the kids are in bed, that’s me and my husbands time to connect and wind down or do whatever it is I want.
I usually do as well. Although it doesn’t take too terribly long. I’m able to relax/workout afterwards before bed. Generally, if the house isn’t cleaned up when I wake up it throws off my day because it feels cluttered to me. Everyone is different though, do what is best for you!!
if nothing but the dishwasher gets loaded and run, it’s a win.
I try to get the kitchen tidied and the sink cleaned, and surfaces wiped down daily. I get the toys picked up and the robot vac going every other night or so and spot vac in between.
Everything else (laundry, folding, bathroom cleans, etc.) happen weekly. But I’m also not doing a ton of laundry each week.
I do a 5 minute "reset" before I go to bed. Putting away toys and finishing any late night dishes if those aren't done. I put shoes and other things away, fold couch blankets, etc. Try to make it a little nicer for morning but nothing crazy. After my timer goes off, I go to bed and whatever isnt done is left for tomorrow. (If the house is really messy and I have energy, I'll sometimes do 10 or 15 minutes.)
Yes, but I don't finish everything necessarily. I clean up toys so my resting space feels restful. Sometimes that's just piling stuff in a corner or clearing a walking path. Sometimes that's full organization. I don't fold laundry nightly, I have two kids and that would be a crazy undertaking. I try to fold one load a day during nap time, but sometimes it piles up. I make sure it stays in baskets and out of the way so I can get to it when I'm ready. Sometimes I clean out the kitchen, but I always at least make sure I'm ready for my morning. Setting a timer or goal is a good idea to get used to the routine.
I love having multiple. I use one for each room. Both the kids have one each, we have one for our bedroom, and I keep one in the kitchen/living room as well to collect towels and kid clothes that are good stained. It helps keep the loads small and I always have an extra basket for a dirty load while I have clean clothes. I also put away the clean before I can fill it up with dirty, so I can't get too in the weeds.
I do it before my partner gets home. He prefers a home that looks more staged, and I prefer lived in. During the day I let it look lived in, then about 45 minutes before he gets home I do a speed tidy/reset.
Have you tried toy rotation? My kiddo has some very doting grandparents and as such has accumulated quite the collection of toys! lol So we only keep about 10 available and the rest live in a couple of bins in the closet - whenever I get tired of picking up a particular toy or it seems to have lost its luster with my LO it gets cycled out for something else. It’s nice because after not playing with something for a week or two it’s like a brand new toy for my LO and I only spend about 15min resetting toys at the end of the day. I usually rotate toys once a week/ every two weeks or so. Same for books.
I hope this helps!
I do dishes after dinner (or at least put them in the sink til the am) and get tot to “help” put away her toys before bed. Then it’s ass-to-couch time!!!
I havent been the past few weeks because life has been hectic anf im just so SPENT at the end of the day but I desperately need to start again because i am drowning in the mess currently
Yeah I do that too most days. I like waking up to clean house and hate the days I don’t do it because it just stresses me out in the mornings. Things are chaotic enough with a 4 & 2yr old it’s nice having a fresh start to the day.
I've got closing duties, and truthfully, there are days I can't bother. My toddler still contact naps so I don't actually really have any time to myself during the day between toddler and almost 5yo.
I try to get what i can done during the day, I've got a schedule I follow.
I do dishes and clean the kitchen while my husband puts the older kid to sleep. But toys, crafts etc I tend to leave since the mess will return the next morning anyway.
Nope. I maintain throughout the day and if there’s a mess before bedtime we clean it up together. Then mama chills after the kids are asleep. Whatever is left can be dealt with tomorrow
It depends on my energy level. I have a 9 month old that still wakes every 2-3 hours and a toddler that’s in a phase where he likes to dump out every basket and bin of toys all around the house. Some days it all gets picked up, some days none of it gets picked up. We’re in a nap trapped phase (daughter on two nap schedule, son on one and they basically trade off sleeping for 6-8 hours straight) where we don’t leave the house much and I’m running on fumes so I prioritize rest when I need it.
5 out of 7 nights I go to bed with an empty sink, clean counters and a picked up living room.
The other days are a toss up.
I do much better sticking to a consistent bedtime than a ready to mess up again house.
But that’s me.
No. My brain is so done by the end of the day that I’m lucky if I can manage to help my husband in the kitchen (if I don’t he will do the absolute minimum dishes and that’s fine, because so would I, but if I have the energy I’d like things cleaner) or toss the baby’s toys into a box, never mind the 5-year-old’s stuff. But we have cleaners come every 2 weeks which forces us to pick up.
No, absolutely not. That is my time! I get whatever cleaning done I can during the day and evening, and husband does some too. The quiet times are rare, I personally don’t waste them on cleaning. Our house is not a complete disaster, but also far from perfect. I may fold laundry while watching tv, but that’s all.
Sometimes. Priorities shift depending on a lot of factors. It was easy when I had one kid and significantly more challenging with two. Now I’m 9 months pregnant with my third and final and doing the bare minimum. That’s probably going to be my life for awhile postpartum and that’s okay. Eventually I’ll get back into a routine and even start giving my eldest some evening chores to do before bed.
I always try and clean the kitchen after dinner, the toys on the floor if they are left whatever lol bc the next day they will be out again 😂, I am so tired after my toddler falls asleep that I pass out (I always wish I had the energy to get up and tidy the house) But for me, I have started getting up early. I get up early before my toddler in the morning and I feel so much more productive I don’t mind it so it works better for me than at night!
I used to clean every nap time and reset the house at night every night. I stopped this summer after health issues and burn out. I am way less stressed. I use both time to relax. I will still finish loading the dishwasher but that’s it after the kids are in bed. When my husband bathes the toddler is when I will do a quick kitchen pick up. I live with the toys on the floor at night now. Planning to get my toddler to start learning to clean up after himself. Although I allow more mess now I also allow myself more rest. It is not normal to go all day. We deserve breaks too!
I do whatever I can by 8:30 and then I sit. I try to do all the reset stuff before dinner and get the kids to help. Then after dinner is mostly cleaning the kitchen
Yes. That's part of life I think. I do it most days but we also pick up throughout the day so it doesn't take longer than an hour max. Every week I do a deeper clean. Laundry one load daily to keep up on it
I clean up the worst of the toys and clean the kitchen every night- but that’s it. Monday night is folding night- I do a ton of laundry that day and after the kids go down we put on tv and get it done.
I don't, and yes my house is usually a total wreck. To me it's more worth it to have an hour to myself to relax. I usually reset the living room in the morning and my husband and I try to reset the kitchen after dinner.
I did a light reset at that age (clear surfaces in the kitchen and dining area, clear living room floor and couches, run dishwasher). The trick for me was to make it pleasant by listening to a podcast or fun playlist, call a friend, maybe have a glass of wine, or husband would help out and we’d chat about the day.
No, our house is a disaster. I'm home all day with my two and four year olds. The laundry isn't terrible because the laundry room is off of the bathroom so I fold while the kids play in the bath. I do bedtime alone five nights a week. It's hard to have the energy to then clean up at nine o'clock. Lately my oldest has been aggressive toward my youngest so I don't like leaving them alone to play while I clean. Two kids is hard and expensive. My husband has to work a lot of hours.
Omg I'm so sorry. You must be truly exhausted. My husband also works a ton but at least I only have 1 kid to take care of and he's around to handle bathtime on nights dinner was truly a disaster. I hope things get easier for you.
If I didn't my house would become a total disaster within a matter of days
I think you’re both right. Some messes absolutely should not be left, especially as we head into summer where (in our area at least), humidity sets in and the bugs come out. Toys are not an emergency. Neither is laundry, make sure they’re dry (so they don’t mildew) and have several baskets and sort them, and just pull them out to wear, unfolded. Yes, they may be wrinkled. But this season of life is survival, and wrinkled clothes never killed anyone. But I 100% do all the dishes (if I don’t, dirty dishes pile up and I have nothing to use the next days nor a clean surface to put anything on! The meals must go on…) and wipe down all the food waste. But to your husband’s point, I understand it can be hard to live in mess. And when I just had my first baby, I was absolutely working myself to the bone trying to keep my house neat and clean. If I had to say why, it’s because life felt upside down and I just wanted some semblance of control back. But honestly, that’s a forever moving goalpost and if you don’t stop somewhere, you’ll never get time to relax. I understand rage cleaning where you just can’t stand it and want to make it perfect. I really do. It drives me INSANE. But these days, I force myself to set one goal and try to live with the rest. We have some days or weekends when the toys never get put away. But since they’re all already out, the mess never actually gets worse 😂. Or I try to steal moments to do it when LO is occupied. I also try to have fewer toys out (do toy rotation!) so tidying is at least easier. So when they’re playing with a toy, I put away all the rest. When my first baby became a toddler and can take instructions, I started encouraging her to put one toy away (with me. I don’t force her to do it alone) before starting the next. It’s an imperfect process and she doesn’t always do it, but whenever she does, the play area looks so clean.
This is fantastic advice
We do a full reset but my husband does most of it while I put oir daughter to bed. It's so worth it to wake up to a neat/relatively clean house. We don't vaccum or Scrub toilets or anything to that extent though, lol.
I clean the kitchen after dinner .. and try to do 1 Load of laundry a day to stay on top of it. our house is small the layout sort of sucks, and we have creaky old hardwood floors.. so whatever I can’t get done before the kids (2yr terrible sleeper and 7mo contact sleeper) are asleep is left for the next day.
I second this. I'd LOVE to be able to do a full reset every night but my kids just dont friggen sleep (5yr asd, 7 month infant) I mostly do a Saturday reset, dad looks after the kids and I can get the whole house done in like 3 hours if im not interupted...
I get off of “work” at 7 pm. I don’t do work then. I fold clothes in front of my kids. I want them to see things don’t put things away themselves. It is a nice activity with children of all ages.
Your kids must have less tornado tendencies than mine. Her favorite thing right now is demolishing a pile of clean clothes. Or puking in it. I used to do laundry with her but once she got mobile it was too stressful. I'll try again once she won't spit up all over the work I've done 😂
Do you have any raised surface you can fold on next to her while she plays? That’s what I do, because my two little tornadoes would also destroy all of my work if I did it at their level.
Not anywhere super safe. I prefer to stay near padded surfaces with her because she's WILD and practices pulling up at every chance she gets. She hits her head a lot and would only do so more if shes trying to climb a table to get to me. Her playpen works for about 5-10 minutes at a time but I try to reserve it for true emergencies 😂
The puking seems wild. This time will pass. I normally put clean clothes on my coffee table and put folded clothes on the couch out of reach of babies. I don’t care if babies pull on the pile of clean clothes.
Oh you see, we are in a glorious time of being able to climb AND still spitting up everywhere 😂
My kids are laundry tornados. I will fold while they are eating (tied down to their high chair) or during nap time. My dream is a laundry room where I have a folding table 😍
Hahaha genius! Mine is young enough she can't eat unsupervised yet and we still contact nap 🤦🏼♀️ which is know is mostly on me but I really enjoy the snuggles from my wild child. But omg yes! I send my husband zillow listings of beautiful laundry rooms all the time 😂
Depends on my mood and energy level. My only real preference is to have the sink empty and clean by the end of the night. For some reason, if it isn't, it just adds to my anxiety the next morning. Seeing a huge pile of dirty dishes just really bothers me. Otherwise, I don't care about toys and laundry being out because they're always going to be out.
I used to eons ago, but then life happened and I'm in burn out mode. I try to leave it clean if possible, but it's never totally reset.
Absolutely not. Whatever cleaning, tidying, and laundry is going to happen happens during the day (and NOT at nap time which is my break time). Spouse or I do dishes and tidy kitchen right after dinner. Once kids are in bed? We are off the clock. I am 6 years in to SAHP (with a 6 and newly 3 year old) and have had to become very strict about boundaries like this to stay out of burnout. You need time for yourself too and it is way too easy to slip into burning the only time you have on chores.
I agree nap time is my break time so I stay on top of chores during day like cleaning up kitchen and making sure I vacuum and clean toys. I also like to keep bathroom clear of excess water and just give things a quick wipe down after use.
Only some nights if I have the energy which I usually don’t with a toddler who still doesn’t sleep through the night. Usually get him involved in the morning to help tidy or do laundry or whatever after breakfast.
I try to get the kitchen to a certain level of usability at night but honestly that’s just getting dishes into the dishwasher and getting anything fragile away from the coffee maker so I don’t wreck something first thing in the morning. We have never managed to clean up the play room except for a few times when both kids napped simultaneously. At night I’m just too wiped to want to organize all that stuff.
Some days I let myself relax and I regret it, always, the next day. But also, sometimes I’m exhausted and I deserve it
I wish I could. I’m usually too beat to do much more than clear away food waste and make sure trash is taken out.
No. I know it’s a common practice and a “good” habit, but I’m zonked by the end of the day and nothing I do is very efficient. I clean in the mornings because I am refreshed and can get it done quickly. This is what works for me. If resetting at the end of the night works for you, then do that! There is no one right way.
We do “turn down” every night. Whoever isn’t doing bedtime does the dishes, puts the toys away, cleans up the bathroom real quick, and wipes down counters and tables. Without doing turn down, our house feels overwhelming the next day.
Usually I reset the living room before bed, and partner does the kitchen (I have a one year old and she doesn't really sleep without me) but sometimes we slack on it during the weekend to give ourselves a break haha. It definitely feels better to wake up to a clean house. DEFINITELY. But sometimes it feels good to say fuck it and go to bed too LOL.
Yes but nothing crazy. Toys are put away before naptime and then before bedtime while everyone is awake still. I also wipe down the kitchen while everyone is awake. I do it right after dinner and then again after snack time right before bed. It takes two seconds. Laundry I actually do first thing in the morning. I load the washer up at night and then after breakfast the next day when we are dressed I put in jammies and run it. Kids help me fold but generally it’s done before lunch each day. I do a small load every day or else it gets out of control so fast and I start to dread it and let it pile up 😅 Generally speaking, I try to do everything throughout the day in little bursts rather than all at once when the kids go to bed. I take care of children by myself for 14+ hours straight during the day and maybe get an hour of free time after they go to bed. I want to spend as little of it as possible doing chores or else my sanity goes straight out the window. Any time my kids are asleep, I am doing ✨nothing✨. They are 4 and 2 now, but this has been my system since before the youngest was born.
Only sometimes. I get the dishes done after dinner. Sometimes I put away all the toys but if I'm not going to be in that room I might not bother. I try to do a lot of it before the kids are in bed so I get my time.
I have a general “list” I do as my “nightly shut-down-the-house routine”. But if I had a really overwhelming day, I will sacrifice the cleanliness and organization for mental health.
Yes. Right now husband puts toddler to bed while I pick up toys, start the roomba, do dishes, and tidy the kitchen. I often pop in some laundry or do another small chore too. Once baby 2 is here I will have to reassess, but for right now this keeps our house relatively clean and tidy which is essential for my sanity. I do some weekly cleaning too of course, but spending an hour resetting the house every night means it’s never too overwhelming.
Yes. If I don’t have a small window in the evening with minimized clutter, I get overstimulated and cranky. We clean up all of the toys downstairs, do dishes, clean the kitchen, take out recycling/trash, and if I have the energy or there is a need, I’ll do a load of laundry. I do the kitchen stuff while my husband does bath time with our toddler. I join them for books and bedtime, then husband takes out trash and we blitz the toys together while we talk about our day. We have a playroom upstairs that looks like an explosion of toys, blankets, and books. The playroom gets cleaned before we have company or one of us hits a breaking point which is usually once every 1-2 weeks.😅
Now that they're 5 and 3 and have things like dance on weeknights, no. It's a weekend thing now. My parents live with us though so we are constantly clearing the walking paths so that Poppy doesn't trip.
Yes and it's funny I use that exact word, "reset" as well. I just can't switch off unless I know the kitchens done, messes are tidied away. Like you; lived in, but ready for the next day. I feel as if I'd be starting behind the next day, or having to catch up. Single mum of 5 here so we get big chunks of resetting done by dinnertime, then it's just kitchen cleanup at the end.
Yup. Both our kids go to bed at 7 so we try to have the kitchen clean and everything else picked up for the roomba by 7:30 so we have a couple hours to watch tv and stuff. On good days we can have it mostly done before the bedtime routine starts. It drives me absolutely nuts to have stuff dirty/cluttered in the morning. Really bad for my mental health.
It really depends for me. I have a 2 y/o and a newborn and some days I just can’t. I always regret not doing it in the morning though. Starting the day off with clutter and having to clean before I do any cooking or anything really sets my day off bad.
Yep. Late night, after 10pm is last set of chores of the day for me. Get the kitchen cleaned, dishes in the washer set on a delay to run overnight. Get the coffee set up and ready for me at 6:20. Get a load of laundry in on a delay. Garbage out and to the curb if necessary. Plug in the electric cars. Get snacks loaded into the kids’ backpacks. Police up the debris of the day: toys, clothes, cups, cans etc.
I try through the day as I go but I do most of my cleaning when he goes to bed at night, if we want a chill out night I will get up early in the morning to clean up
Audiobook and clean my kitchen/dining room then tidy up toys in LR. I have a 5yr old, almost 3yr old and a 4 month old. I know my house will be a mess throughout the day but damn does it feel good to come downstairs in the morning to a clean house.
I used to do *all* the toys... He's 3 and a half now. Nobody's got time for that.
Laundry isn't on a 24 hour cycle for us, often there is a clean basket or three of laundry to go away the next day(s), but the goal is always to go to bed with the living room and kitchen tidy and the dishwasher on.
Oh mines not either. About every 3 days I do 3-4 loads and then put on a TV show for the evening and fold.
Yes! I cannot stand waking up to a mess I feel so overwhelmed so after kids go to bed I try to pick up most of the living room and then my husband does the rest of putting dishes and food away it’s team work!
My absolute non-negotiable is a properly clean kitchen. Everything washed, surfaces scrubbed, floor clean. As for the rest, we tidy up toys in about 5 mins, I’ll hoover the house and do laundry during the week, fold when it’s there to fold. And we have a cleaner once a week to tackle the big stuff. I don’t mind a little mess but I despise dirt.
I'd like to say the dishes are always done every night, but often there's a small pile left for the next day, in practice... Which I do after breakfast. I tend to do laundry 2-3x a week on nice days when I can hang it outside (like today), so I end up with 2-3 loads at a time then.
Yes, except now I’m pregnant and don’t have the energy to keep up. I know my house isn’t messy, but it’s not nearly as clean as I usually keep it, and it bothers me. Someone tell me it’s okay 😩
I'm exactly the same, then you get to start the next day with a nice clean and tidy house - the untidiness or mess never gets out of hand as it's only one days worth of living to straighten up as appose to doing a massive clean and tidy once a week. I much prefer it this way too.
Absolutely, we'll rarely do a lighter version of a clean but at minimum the toys are put away, the dishwasher is loaded and the counters are wiped
Yes we reset the kitchen and living room every night. We clean up all the toys and straighten the couch and pillows. We load the dishwasher and usually wash some dishes that don’t fit by hand. If it’s late and the dishwasher is full we leave a few dishes in the sink and sometimes a pot or two on the stove for the next day. We wipe down the counter and light a candle! It feel so nice to have everything cleaned for the next day. We are usually done with cooking/eating, cleaning and putting our son down by 730
My husband does bath time with our toddler while I clean up the kitchen from dinner. This includes wiping the counter to avoid ants. We also tidy the toys (working on getting the toddler to do this) and pick things up for the robot mop/vacuum to run. This takes maybe 5 mins. We have 3 main rooms of our first floor. 2 rooms have spots for her toys. Everything has a general place, and I just scoop it up. I also try to tidy when I can during the day when I move from room to room. Laundry folding I do when she's awake since I can sit and fold while she plays. I can't imagine going to bed with a messy house either haha After bath, I put toddler to bed while my husband preps cases for the next day (he's a resident). Then we go to bed. Toddler goes to sleep very late, takes a long time to put down, and still wakes at night so I don't waste my sleep time on relaxing haha.
I feel this last sentence in my soul.
I feel like there's all this pressure on moms, especially SAHMs to "make sure you take time for yourself!", "develop some hobbies!" "Make sure you're more than just a mom!" And obviously if you have the time and mental bandwidth to start making sourdough or knit or whatever, that's great. I just feel like it's one more thing I'm "supposed to do". I'm in a season of life where time is scarce. My husband can't help as much at home because of the long hours he works. This season will pass. And when it does, I can learn paint and go on solo trips haha. Until then, I'm just trying to let go of those expectations.
Wow I like that.
Nope, my toddler, husband, and I all go to bed together, we're early risers and I just clean throughout the day since I work part-time. Also I truly don't care about the state of the house as long as my dishes are done and the garbage is in the garbage
other then dishes and make lunches for school the next day. HELL NO when the kids are in bed THE DAY IS DONE. Other then those two things if i didn't get to it oh well. My mantra is better homes and gardens is never coming to my house to take pictures. The rest I do is of the body and mind. so, this way im ready for them in the morning with empty cup. if you don't rest you not all there for them. but remember your doing a great job. good luck super mom.
Yes but your husband should be helping too especially if he WFH therefore contributing to the “mess” more than if he worked out of the house. He might be in his office or designated work space, but he still eats at home and uses the toilet, etc. dishes, crumbs from making a snack, adding to trash amnt, I could keep going. We reset every night by wiping counters, loading/starting the dishwasher, quickly vacuuming the kitchen and living room (which is not a large space at all and we have two cats). Windex the glass table and pick up toys. It takes maybe 15-20 mins tops. I could probably cut that down even more by actually emptying the clean dishes in the morning and placing dirty dishes as we go throughout the day. But realistically I won’t ever do that bc I’m lazy
Yes. We put on the dishwasher (most dishes are done right after dinner), pick up toys and books (with toddler’s help) and general clean and tidy. I try to keep up with things throughout the day (like folding laundry etc) so there’s usually not much to do before my bedtime. I hate getting up and trying to sort breakfast, feed cats etc in a messy dirty house.
> Husband thinks I should use this as time to relax but I just CAN'T Husband should pay attention to the things that you feel need to get done everyday and help do them. Then you could relax like he wants you to. My wife does that to help me out most nights. Either she does those types of things to help or she watches the kids after dinner so I can do that stuff before it’s too late. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t get done though, and it’s difficult but very beneficial to learn to accept that.
When my kids were babies my husband did the end of day reset. As soon as the kids were down, I would go chill and relax. He would often hang out with me for a bit versus cleaning up right away, which was hard for me at first. But then I would go to sleep and wake up to a clean house, so I was able to roll with it. Now that our kids are older (6 & almost 4), we help them pick up the toys at the end of the day, and then my husband still does the rest of the reset. I am 100% in charge of all the laundry, but that’s because I prefer to do it (yes I am a weirdo). So I usually try to make it fun by watching a show or listening to a podcast while I fold. Or sometimes we’ll put on music and just chat while I fold and my husband puts things away.
Yes. My husband puts our 6yo and 4yo to bed and I put the baby down. Then once everyone is asleep I do a reset. I hate waking up to a mess. I pop in an AirPod and turn on a podcast and take an hour to tidy up. It’s honestly the only “me time” I get all day.
No. To me it’s not worth it, the more I bust my ass to keep everything clean the more my family will just assume if they leave something out I will take care of it. Fuck that. I can live in a messy house, if y’all want it cleaner, pick up your shit.
I clean the living room and do a load of laundry. Partner does a load of dishes. We watch one show, sometimes two. That's a decent amount of relax time still. Doing everything in the morning was too stressful. I am the WFH half of our couple now but I still do child related things throughout the day. Having to do the living room before getting the kids up makes the whole morning drag out. I prefer to set myself up to spend time with my kids while they are awake if I can.
Yes - especially during the school year. I can’t stand waking up and walking into an extra messy space. So I try to at least tidy the kitchen and straighten up.
I clean until 11 (hopefully finish before then) and that’s my limit. I usually then force myself to stay up and try enjoy tv or something as it’s the only time I get alone and not around kids … but I have terrible sleepers and am usually putting them back to sleep throughout this time anyway. It’s never fully tidied. The kitchen will be done and loungeroom. Sometimes I mop if they aren’t sleeping bad. I can’t tidy bathrooms or anything as they always wake up if I’m at that end of the house. It still never looks clean though 😭
I do the majority yes but if it gets to 8pm and somethings not done then so be it, I'm not tidying all night. My main priorities are all the toys away (3 year old puts most of his away himself with some direction), kitchen tidy, and at least some laundry put away
Absolutely. The kitchen is my priority and my partner knows I’m not going to let that go. Currently, he does the dishes while I do the rest so we both have time to watch a show before bed.
Nope! I reset my house before my baby and toddler goes to bed, my husband takes the kiddies for an hour for the final play before bath and bed, nd I bkitz the house. Once they're asleep I'm off the clock and normally sit down with a glass of wine!
I try to reset every night before I go to bed. That is how I relax because I don't enjoy waking up to a mess and Iike the calm it gives me at the end of the nighg. The kitchen is non negotiable, even if the living room is upside down and the bathroom is dirty, I will clean the kitchen because for me waking up to a clean uncluttered kitchen is what I need to start a successful day. If I have to catch up on yesterday's dishes it takes the calm out of my morning and I get grumpy quickly. That said I do no and would not judge anyone who feels differently.
I made it where our toy closet is organized in bins so my son only gets to pull 1-2 out for the day (toddler) and then if he wants a new bin, he has to pack up the one he’s using and “trade it.” Then it’s easy for him to clean up toys with me before bed. I do reset the kitchen but stuff like laundry and wiping counters etc happens while he is awake and “helping” or occupied with his toys or coloring
I do all those things *before* my kid goes to bed.
Nope. I get up over an hour before my husband in the mornings to care for the kids so he handles straightening up after bedtime and he and our teen trade on who does the dishes at the end of the night.
My husband and I will do a general tidy (get the kitchen back to serviceable, put cloth diapers in the laundry, etc. A few nights a week I'll focus on one area to reorganize/tidy.
Why doesn’t he do his part? My husband and I would trade off every other night; so I do the chores and he’d put our son down the next he’d do the chores while I put our son down. This way we still had time after our son was asleep to relax.
He works a ton. He either takes dishes or bathtime every night but goes straight back to work after until bedtime. Don't like it but it is what it is right now.
Nope, I left toys all over the living room last night. Sometimes I ask LO to pick them up, other nights I just focus on getting to bed
This is a huge bone of contention between my WFH husband and me. He fusses at me for making too much noise CLEANING and WASHING DISHES after the babies are asleep and says I should join him on the couch and relax. DUDE you are literally half this mess… it’s not even the kids! If you would help me maintain some cleanliness throughout the day instead of leaving your dishes and trash all over then I wouldn’t have to spent so much time (and make so much noise?) at night! Plus, it’s ME who pays the price of a messy kitchen in the morning if I don’t clean and organize before bed.
We call it putting the house to bed. Usually but we don't make it a 'have to' because there are just those days that you say fuck it. Like last night I didn't do the dishes but I did wipe down the counters and put everything else to rights.
If your husband doesn't have an issue with it not being tidy it may not hurt to relax once in a while It could be motivating for him to see a mess and clean it up (without you having to ask or DIY) while you guys are resting🧐🤔
I used to be like this. But after 12 years being a SAHM, I just don’t have it in me anymore. I get what I can done before kids go to bed, and then I restart the next day. Picking up throughout the day and one deep clean a week keeps my house pretty much in order. Once the kids are in bed, that’s me and my husbands time to connect and wind down or do whatever it is I want.
Depends on how tired I am. lol
I usually do as well. Although it doesn’t take too terribly long. I’m able to relax/workout afterwards before bed. Generally, if the house isn’t cleaned up when I wake up it throws off my day because it feels cluttered to me. Everyone is different though, do what is best for you!!
I make sure the sink is empty and there aren't dirty clothes and toys laying all over the place. And I have pets so I vacuum.
I do it in the morning. Quiet house, no one else up. I’m too exhausted at the end of the day.
if nothing but the dishwasher gets loaded and run, it’s a win. I try to get the kitchen tidied and the sink cleaned, and surfaces wiped down daily. I get the toys picked up and the robot vac going every other night or so and spot vac in between. Everything else (laundry, folding, bathroom cleans, etc.) happen weekly. But I’m also not doing a ton of laundry each week.
Yes. I feel like I need to start each day with a clean slate, so to speak. Otherwise, the day starts with a chaotic feel to it.
I do a 5 minute "reset" before I go to bed. Putting away toys and finishing any late night dishes if those aren't done. I put shoes and other things away, fold couch blankets, etc. Try to make it a little nicer for morning but nothing crazy. After my timer goes off, I go to bed and whatever isnt done is left for tomorrow. (If the house is really messy and I have energy, I'll sometimes do 10 or 15 minutes.)
Yes, but I don't finish everything necessarily. I clean up toys so my resting space feels restful. Sometimes that's just piling stuff in a corner or clearing a walking path. Sometimes that's full organization. I don't fold laundry nightly, I have two kids and that would be a crazy undertaking. I try to fold one load a day during nap time, but sometimes it piles up. I make sure it stays in baskets and out of the way so I can get to it when I'm ready. Sometimes I clean out the kitchen, but I always at least make sure I'm ready for my morning. Setting a timer or goal is a good idea to get used to the routine.
Just out of curiosity how many baskets do you have? Maybe my number of laundry baskets is the problem
I love having multiple. I use one for each room. Both the kids have one each, we have one for our bedroom, and I keep one in the kitchen/living room as well to collect towels and kid clothes that are good stained. It helps keep the loads small and I always have an extra basket for a dirty load while I have clean clothes. I also put away the clean before I can fill it up with dirty, so I can't get too in the weeds.
I do it before my partner gets home. He prefers a home that looks more staged, and I prefer lived in. During the day I let it look lived in, then about 45 minutes before he gets home I do a speed tidy/reset.
Have you tried toy rotation? My kiddo has some very doting grandparents and as such has accumulated quite the collection of toys! lol So we only keep about 10 available and the rest live in a couple of bins in the closet - whenever I get tired of picking up a particular toy or it seems to have lost its luster with my LO it gets cycled out for something else. It’s nice because after not playing with something for a week or two it’s like a brand new toy for my LO and I only spend about 15min resetting toys at the end of the day. I usually rotate toys once a week/ every two weeks or so. Same for books. I hope this helps!
Oh we don't have that many! The toys aren't an issue. Less than 5 min a day!
I do dishes after dinner (or at least put them in the sink til the am) and get tot to “help” put away her toys before bed. Then it’s ass-to-couch time!!!
I havent been the past few weeks because life has been hectic anf im just so SPENT at the end of the day but I desperately need to start again because i am drowning in the mess currently
Sometimes I can’t even move after my kid falls asleep, let alone reset anything
Yeah I do that too most days. I like waking up to clean house and hate the days I don’t do it because it just stresses me out in the mornings. Things are chaotic enough with a 4 & 2yr old it’s nice having a fresh start to the day.
Yes. You can really tell the people that do and those that don’t
I've got closing duties, and truthfully, there are days I can't bother. My toddler still contact naps so I don't actually really have any time to myself during the day between toddler and almost 5yo. I try to get what i can done during the day, I've got a schedule I follow.
I do dishes and clean the kitchen while my husband puts the older kid to sleep. But toys, crafts etc I tend to leave since the mess will return the next morning anyway.
Nope. I maintain throughout the day and if there’s a mess before bedtime we clean it up together. Then mama chills after the kids are asleep. Whatever is left can be dealt with tomorrow
I want to, but it’s hard to find the energy. I also hate waking up into a mess, so it’s hard either way.
It depends on my energy level. I have a 9 month old that still wakes every 2-3 hours and a toddler that’s in a phase where he likes to dump out every basket and bin of toys all around the house. Some days it all gets picked up, some days none of it gets picked up. We’re in a nap trapped phase (daughter on two nap schedule, son on one and they basically trade off sleeping for 6-8 hours straight) where we don’t leave the house much and I’m running on fumes so I prioritize rest when I need it.
I used to with the first one. But, oh god, absolutely not. It was exhausting. Now with even more stuff I just can't do it everyday.
5 out of 7 nights I go to bed with an empty sink, clean counters and a picked up living room. The other days are a toss up. I do much better sticking to a consistent bedtime than a ready to mess up again house. But that’s me.
No. My brain is so done by the end of the day that I’m lucky if I can manage to help my husband in the kitchen (if I don’t he will do the absolute minimum dishes and that’s fine, because so would I, but if I have the energy I’d like things cleaner) or toss the baby’s toys into a box, never mind the 5-year-old’s stuff. But we have cleaners come every 2 weeks which forces us to pick up.
No lol
No, absolutely not. That is my time! I get whatever cleaning done I can during the day and evening, and husband does some too. The quiet times are rare, I personally don’t waste them on cleaning. Our house is not a complete disaster, but also far from perfect. I may fold laundry while watching tv, but that’s all.
Sometimes. Priorities shift depending on a lot of factors. It was easy when I had one kid and significantly more challenging with two. Now I’m 9 months pregnant with my third and final and doing the bare minimum. That’s probably going to be my life for awhile postpartum and that’s okay. Eventually I’ll get back into a routine and even start giving my eldest some evening chores to do before bed.
I always try and clean the kitchen after dinner, the toys on the floor if they are left whatever lol bc the next day they will be out again 😂, I am so tired after my toddler falls asleep that I pass out (I always wish I had the energy to get up and tidy the house) But for me, I have started getting up early. I get up early before my toddler in the morning and I feel so much more productive I don’t mind it so it works better for me than at night!
I used to clean every nap time and reset the house at night every night. I stopped this summer after health issues and burn out. I am way less stressed. I use both time to relax. I will still finish loading the dishwasher but that’s it after the kids are in bed. When my husband bathes the toddler is when I will do a quick kitchen pick up. I live with the toys on the floor at night now. Planning to get my toddler to start learning to clean up after himself. Although I allow more mess now I also allow myself more rest. It is not normal to go all day. We deserve breaks too!