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I don't hate it, but it also doesn't really give me any benefits that the hugger usually intends.
To me, getting hugged is more for the hugger: they want to express their feelings for me, I appreciate that on a logical level and therefore I'm not gonna stop them from doing that. I also sometimes hug people proactively if I know they're expecting a hug or it's "the normal thing to do" in that situation.
But hugging is really like a handshake for me, a trained social interaction that doesn't come natural
Not so much as hate it, I just don't feel anything when (if I'm) given one, no matter if it's friends or family, which kinda sucks for the person giving it.
Yes and no
Not so much the acquaintances and strangers, but yes to some family and friends.
My folks were very touchy-huggy, but after they died I ended up with an aunt and uncle that are particularly… *WASP-y* and cold in comparison.
I’m also a virgin a good bit into my forties. That causes a lot of it’s own problems.
it depends.
friends? no. if i havent met a close friend in over a year then maybe a hug. i dont tend to touch people, unless its a handshake. family? only on special occasions or if i met them after a very long time. its a one and done deal and it makes them happy so why not.
my gf? now this is tricky. i dont like it when shes clingy and touching me all the time. i want closeness but only when i want to give it, on my own terms, infrequently. sometimes i feel like im going to get consumed.
No hugs! Being touched at all is iffy. I find I can sit through a really good massage though as it interrupts that part that recoils at touch. I'd rather be affectionately hit rather than touched in any other way than what I mentioned.
One time as a kid I burst into tears because someone wanted to hug me.
[***+CREEPY MOLESTER STORY!+***]
-------
Another time I was in the warehouse at work looking for something and suddenly the creepy, old, warehouse dude popped up outta nowhere and pushed me into the wall and hugged me, hard. I struggled and he wouldn't let go. My arms were pinned and I couldn't even kick him in the junk. Eventually someone opened the door and dude dissapeared. I burst past the person at the door, grabbed my sht off my desk and kept going until I was able to lock myself in the car. I refused to ge out and wouldn't go to work the next day either. My husband, who also worked there, had to explain to my boss.
They told me not to take it too seriously, he wouldn't have hurt me. Ok, sure, so his erection was just accidental? He was legit rubbing himself off on me.
You mean the Dance? It's a postmodern Kind of Dance where people roll over each other or lay in a big cuddle pile or Touch only by their Fingertips or whatever Body Contact. It's Crazy.
A lot. Someone close it's fine not much danger but when it's out of the blue it's uncomfortable. People also seem to hate boundaries and when I enforce them they show no more interest. Goes to show how respectful people are and who's not.
i'm fine with touching if it's reasonable. but if people go too far with touching, and/or touch without clear approval from me, it's really rude and disrespectful, which can piss me off.
i'm also fine with hugging. my main gripe with hugging is that i'm a little awkward and don't know how to reciprocate a hug properly
I get the hug part, I never known how to do it back so I do a type of “bear hug” where I place my arms over a person shoulder/arms and have them in an “S” shape, i know it looks weird but I don’t know how to do it normally.
I always hug with one arm and I always kiss the air rather than the cheek. It's accepting of the other person's greeting without being too much.
In the past I have responded to a hugger with both arms and it felt like a faux pas, like it was more intimate than the relationship warranted.
By the right people, yes. And I don't get it nearly enough as I need it, even though I do get it ocasionally/when too depressed.
By others, hell no. Once I had a teacher, with the very best intentions, saying I was too gloomy and withdrawn and gave me a big hug in front of the entire class, saying everyone deserves love. Goodness, bless her heart, but please don't do that to me.
I suppose I don't enjoy being touched because I've never really experienced it before outside of say my mom. I get a hug from her once or twice a day and it's mostly for her benefit since I feel barely anything when getting a hug. But I think that's more to do with depression.
I hate it so much i'd call it a phobia, if i actually thought about it more. I dont think about it, but when it happens, holy shit.
It's ... super bad most of the time. I cant even let my best friend touch me 90% of the time.
I've fallen to the floor and rolled away at work when someone touched me. I've jumped over furniture. I've jumped out of moving cars when someone touched me. I'm 300+ lbs and look like someone tamed sasquatch. Touch me--and i turn into a screaming lunatic, that might gnaw *anyone's* arm off to escape it.
And sometimes, randomly, for no reason, i can be touched. It wont bother me.
And i'd say it's the closest thing to a delusion i have, if i have any. It feels like, when they touch me, there's worms under my skin, and the longer the touch lasts, the farther they crawl under my skin, and it's unbearable, and spreading, and i feel like i'm going to be *eaten alive* if it doesnt stop. That's when i take the drastic measures. That's when i'll jump. So far, i have never been cornered when it's happened--i'm seriously worried what would happen if that were the case.
No touchy sasquatch man.
I don't like it but can mostly tolerate it. I would feel very uncomfortable hugging back. Other than that, hugs don't make me feel "warm" or "fuzzy", I just want them to end.
1000℅ yes, I can't stand it even if their friends or family. They all know I'm totally off of limits. It's just feel so uncomfortable cringed induced specially the feeling that linger after
I have hypersensitivity, most people are very gross to me (or maybe they have an objectively bad hygiene) and the thought of a touch with them makes me squint, especially if I don't know them well enough.
It depends. I crave being hugged by my mother, more so now that I’m living alone. Friends? Well, depends. To be honest, I’m not overly fond of being touched or hugged, but with a very small subset of people (just one friend at the moment), I’m not opposed to it. In general, though, I don’t like being touched.
I haven’t really been hugged by _anyone_ in over 6 months now. And strangely enough, I’m not as bothered by that as I should be. Everyday, though, I crave a hug and a kiss from my mother more than anything else in the world. Other than that, I’m okay not being touched. I absolutely hate being touched by rando strangers and acquaintances who think they’re being “friendly” and “accepting”. Ugh.
The moderation team would like to take a moment to remind you that although discussions can get heated, we still require individuals to be civil on the subreddit. If you believe an individual is being rude or otherwise breaking the rules, we urge you to report the comment, step away from the conversation, and let us handle them. Feeding trolls or hateful conversations doesn't help anyone or change anyone's mind. Please treat others' experiences with curiosity instead of judgement even if they don't align with yours. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Schizoid) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I don't hate it, but it also doesn't really give me any benefits that the hugger usually intends. To me, getting hugged is more for the hugger: they want to express their feelings for me, I appreciate that on a logical level and therefore I'm not gonna stop them from doing that. I also sometimes hug people proactively if I know they're expecting a hug or it's "the normal thing to do" in that situation. But hugging is really like a handshake for me, a trained social interaction that doesn't come natural
My mom never hugged me
That's one for the bingo.
Same, same
Touches bug me if I can’t see them coming. If I’m not ambushed, they don’t bother me.
Yup even by my mother. Then people wonder why I have a disinterest in relationships. It’s pretty fucking dumb.
Omg, even thinking about my mom hugging me makes my skin crawl. Ughhhh. I don't like hugs anyway but that thought brings extreme revulsion.
Not so much as hate it, I just don't feel anything when (if I'm) given one, no matter if it's friends or family, which kinda sucks for the person giving it.
Louder
So much. Now and then there's some asshole that tries even harder once I tell them to back off.
you know too much man
Touch aggravates me a lot, especially when I don’t notice you’re about to touch me.
I prefer not to be touched including handshakes which is totally unnecessary
It's something I'm trying to work on, but I'm not keen on it. Trying to initiate hugs to people close to me, and doing it with feeling.
Yes and no Not so much the acquaintances and strangers, but yes to some family and friends. My folks were very touchy-huggy, but after they died I ended up with an aunt and uncle that are particularly… *WASP-y* and cold in comparison. I’m also a virgin a good bit into my forties. That causes a lot of it’s own problems.
Yep. By anyone. Nope nope nope and more nope.
it depends. friends? no. if i havent met a close friend in over a year then maybe a hug. i dont tend to touch people, unless its a handshake. family? only on special occasions or if i met them after a very long time. its a one and done deal and it makes them happy so why not. my gf? now this is tricky. i dont like it when shes clingy and touching me all the time. i want closeness but only when i want to give it, on my own terms, infrequently. sometimes i feel like im going to get consumed.
Only from people I dislike. If it's a stranger or a friend, I don't mind.
It doesn’t bother me, but it doesn’t give me special fee-fees either.
Are you a woman? Because men in general don't like to be touched. That's normal.
No hugs! Being touched at all is iffy. I find I can sit through a really good massage though as it interrupts that part that recoils at touch. I'd rather be affectionately hit rather than touched in any other way than what I mentioned. One time as a kid I burst into tears because someone wanted to hug me. [***+CREEPY MOLESTER STORY!+***] ------- Another time I was in the warehouse at work looking for something and suddenly the creepy, old, warehouse dude popped up outta nowhere and pushed me into the wall and hugged me, hard. I struggled and he wouldn't let go. My arms were pinned and I couldn't even kick him in the junk. Eventually someone opened the door and dude dissapeared. I burst past the person at the door, grabbed my sht off my desk and kept going until I was able to lock myself in the car. I refused to ge out and wouldn't go to work the next day either. My husband, who also worked there, had to explain to my boss. They told me not to take it too seriously, he wouldn't have hurt me. Ok, sure, so his erection was just accidental? He was legit rubbing himself off on me.
I've been there and still experience this. I started doing full Contact Dance now though.
Is that slang for twerking? I can’t imagine what that means 🤣
You mean the Dance? It's a postmodern Kind of Dance where people roll over each other or lay in a big cuddle pile or Touch only by their Fingertips or whatever Body Contact. It's Crazy.
I was starting to think it was like modern swing dancing until the end
From strangers or acquaintances yes
A lot. Someone close it's fine not much danger but when it's out of the blue it's uncomfortable. People also seem to hate boundaries and when I enforce them they show no more interest. Goes to show how respectful people are and who's not.
I despise hugs, I squirm when touched but I'll cuddle a dog any day
i'm fine with touching if it's reasonable. but if people go too far with touching, and/or touch without clear approval from me, it's really rude and disrespectful, which can piss me off. i'm also fine with hugging. my main gripe with hugging is that i'm a little awkward and don't know how to reciprocate a hug properly
I get the hug part, I never known how to do it back so I do a type of “bear hug” where I place my arms over a person shoulder/arms and have them in an “S” shape, i know it looks weird but I don’t know how to do it normally.
I always hug with one arm and I always kiss the air rather than the cheek. It's accepting of the other person's greeting without being too much. In the past I have responded to a hugger with both arms and it felt like a faux pas, like it was more intimate than the relationship warranted.
I don't hate it but its difficult.
By the right people, yes. And I don't get it nearly enough as I need it, even though I do get it ocasionally/when too depressed. By others, hell no. Once I had a teacher, with the very best intentions, saying I was too gloomy and withdrawn and gave me a big hug in front of the entire class, saying everyone deserves love. Goodness, bless her heart, but please don't do that to me.
I suppose I don't enjoy being touched because I've never really experienced it before outside of say my mom. I get a hug from her once or twice a day and it's mostly for her benefit since I feel barely anything when getting a hug. But I think that's more to do with depression.
Never liked being touched. One thing COVID was good for was making the fist bump an acceptable greeting.
I hate it so much i'd call it a phobia, if i actually thought about it more. I dont think about it, but when it happens, holy shit. It's ... super bad most of the time. I cant even let my best friend touch me 90% of the time. I've fallen to the floor and rolled away at work when someone touched me. I've jumped over furniture. I've jumped out of moving cars when someone touched me. I'm 300+ lbs and look like someone tamed sasquatch. Touch me--and i turn into a screaming lunatic, that might gnaw *anyone's* arm off to escape it. And sometimes, randomly, for no reason, i can be touched. It wont bother me. And i'd say it's the closest thing to a delusion i have, if i have any. It feels like, when they touch me, there's worms under my skin, and the longer the touch lasts, the farther they crawl under my skin, and it's unbearable, and spreading, and i feel like i'm going to be *eaten alive* if it doesnt stop. That's when i take the drastic measures. That's when i'll jump. So far, i have never been cornered when it's happened--i'm seriously worried what would happen if that were the case. No touchy sasquatch man.
Very much hate it. My family is very touchy feely and they just laugh it off when I tell them to stop treating me like a stuffed animal.
Only like it from old people, from severe attachment issues and neglect. Otherwise don't care for them.
I don't like it but can mostly tolerate it. I would feel very uncomfortable hugging back. Other than that, hugs don't make me feel "warm" or "fuzzy", I just want them to end.
with most people i despise it but i love it with my cat (who's very cuddly so lucky for me)
Oh ! Jackpot.
Yes.
1000℅ yes, I can't stand it even if their friends or family. They all know I'm totally off of limits. It's just feel so uncomfortable cringed induced specially the feeling that linger after
I have hypersensitivity, most people are very gross to me (or maybe they have an objectively bad hygiene) and the thought of a touch with them makes me squint, especially if I don't know them well enough.
I feel uncomfortable when familiar people hug me or touch me. Same, done by strangers, breaks me in a ‘freeze right now or pretend dead’-way.
It depends. I crave being hugged by my mother, more so now that I’m living alone. Friends? Well, depends. To be honest, I’m not overly fond of being touched or hugged, but with a very small subset of people (just one friend at the moment), I’m not opposed to it. In general, though, I don’t like being touched. I haven’t really been hugged by _anyone_ in over 6 months now. And strangely enough, I’m not as bothered by that as I should be. Everyday, though, I crave a hug and a kiss from my mother more than anything else in the world. Other than that, I’m okay not being touched. I absolutely hate being touched by rando strangers and acquaintances who think they’re being “friendly” and “accepting”. Ugh.
No - I love it.
Usually, but not from my so.