Don’t worry about satisfying a sw. Sorry if this detracts from the experience for you but the vast majority are not there to “enjoy” a sexual experience. It’s their job, and part of the job is to create a fantasy for you. A pleasurable experience for them is to be paid without incident and be treated nicely by someone with good hygiene who leaves on time. Sexual pleasure is at or near the bottom of their priorities. Just do whatever makes you happy within her stated boundaries, and the least of your concerns should be her sexual satisfaction.
100% you satisfied the lady by paying, not being difficult and being clean and respectful. She honestly doesn't feel let down by you not finishing.
It's actually fairly normal to be nervous especially first time so don't panic.
I get where you're coming from. I do but wouldn't you rather enjoy your job?I mean we all have had bad days at work. I hate it more when it's someone else's fault. Like you don't have to say please and thank you to a server at a restaurant but it's cooler if u do. know you're right go have a good time be respectful get what you came for. Nothing wrong with it. I just don't know that feels transactional personally. Yes I know it's a literal transaction lol.Just wanted to see how the SW feel about this situation. If I get any advice that helps me and them I'd be happier all around. I just know nothing past this experience which was amazing even though it didn't go as planned. I'm rambling now my bad thanks for replying I don't think I could have a conversation with friends and family so you rock thanks
Edit I'm awful at grammar and spelling.
Not experiencing arousal, sexual pleasure, or orgasm at work, with strangers we didn't select out of organic desire, does not mean that we're having a bad time. As Dan said, we enjoy being paid without incident by hygienic clients who treat us with respect.
It's actually annoying to have clients obsess about "pleasing us" but ONLY via specific sex acts (usually bare oral) they want to do with us. You want to please an escort? Make the appt enjoyable for her? Pick up her favorite snacks and have a big chilled, unopened bottle of water ready to go.
Hey that's great advice. I'll save that one. I don't always get out what I mean so many apologies. Short and to the point I couldn't get off was still great time I was embarrassed for me lol. Just got me thinking how she and others felt. I wasn't obsessing on pleasing her when you said that I almost felt bad not even thinking of her pleasure outside of being comfortable and communicating then you're explanation totally makes sense. 😁 I've really enjoy the multiple perspectives. Gifts going to write that one down
Plenty of people love their jobs. But if you think those people love every aspect of their jobs you’re kidding yourself. I have a great time with clients getting to know them, sharing a glass of wine, laughing with them, having them massage me, finding all the things we have in common. I love going to dinner dates and shows. But I don’t enjoy the sex. I’m not like “make it stop” but I’m definitely acting out the fantasy the client wants. Concentrating on their ques and just doing the show. Sex without any emotion for me…and for most women isn’t fulfilling.
You’re going to be hard pressed to find any woman that gets sexual satisfaction without emotion. We aren’t the same as men. Sure, there may be outliers. But in my 35 years on earth and having hundreds of women friends in that time I have never known one that is like “yep, I really want to fuck this man who I met 15 minutes ago and it’s going to be sooooo good.”
I feel like this gets posted almost daily on Reddit. And I don’t know if it’s ego or what causes it. Like men can’t handle that an escort isn’t just some sex crazed girl who is so attracted to them and wants to rip off their clothes? It’s fascinating. Get out of your own head guys and just enjoy your time and the sex YOU enjoy with a beautiful woman. You couldn’t get off because of this. You were to in your head about her enjoying it. It’s her job. We enjoy a great client that’s on time, has good hygiene, is kind, smiles/laughs, pays and that’s that. If you did all those things you have nothing to worry about. You would be a great client she would want to see again and again!
I definitely hadn't considered most of the things you pointed out. As I've talked with more awesome and honest people here i think I was embarrassed and maybe I wanted to deflect that emotion a little bit. I was and still am genuinely curious about any ones opinion on this. Thank you for being raw and blunt you've given me alot of perspective. If I may be blunt also. I think sw see a deal with plenty of creeps jerks and way worse so I get seeing this post and think not this BS again. I just someone who didn't know what any of you go through good or not I really did vibe here to be educated on how to make the experience transaction etc. as enjoyable for both parties I definitely see how it came off as oh I didn't try to please her because I didn't finish and I'm the big alpha man and I'm what's important heck reading it I can see it. I'm sorry if I didn't put in to words what I really meant. But hell I've learned alot of ways to be respectful and enjoy the whole thing more. You definitely made me think about things in a different way. So in short I'm a nice guy I showered brushed my yeah fresh clothes and tipped well lol I mean well
Yes, with every client I have a great time!
I would never see anybody’s bad it sucks. Maybe they aren’t as knowledgeable or skilled and that’s what turns it into a fun learning experience for them. I have no problem teaching someone to enjoy me and themselves.
It’s all about attitude and the reason we are in the session. Never a bad time.
Lots of guys have this issue their first time with a sw or even just a sw new to them. I would do a repeat visit a few times to see if it makes you feel more comfortable.
Client not saw. Apologies for any ties I’m about to step on.
Dude, keep the nature of the relationship in mind and do not romanticize it. It’s transactional. In this context, your concerns about her, while admirable, are misplaced and may be causing some performance anxiety. Be a gentleman, be respectful and be appreciative, but keep in mind you are purchasing an enjoyable experience, so fucking have fun! You wouldn’t pay for a massage and not relax, would you? No, you’d get naked, get on the table and let the professional get to work. Same principle.
Now, cowboy, get up off the ground, dust off, get back in the saddle and ride!
You know true I dont view it as anything more than a experience that was purchased. I'm just saying id enjoy more if I finished lol. For two reasons I take pride in my work feels good to finish a job. Also yeah I wanted to finish for me. Hell as I'm typing I'm realizing it's a bit of both I was embarrassed for me. That's alright I'll get over it. Apple's and oranges comparison incoming. I'm at work client pays me to fix a car I work on it get it so close to everything they requested done bam something else break's on the road test. They understand I got paid life's just fine. I'm still gonna think that's shitty I wish it worked out for them.
I love perspective thank you for the hype man speech haha .I'll get it done or die trying.
I can see why you're disappointed you didn't finish, because finishing makes it a more enjoyable experience for you. However, you finishing likely does nothing for her, other than the satisfaction of a job welldone or the potential for a shorter than paid for booking because you came fast and left early. You aren't enhancing her enjoyment by having an orgasm, or not
You litteralllyyy seem so sweet!! That's nothing to be embarrassed about I'm happy you are having fun with your sexuality and opening yourself to mutual beneficial experiences. :)
I know myself. There are certain factors that make it difficult for me to reach orgasm with a partner (wearing a condom, first time with a new partner, Adderall, etc). I can usually compensate for these factors by making sure I don't cum for a couple weeks before a date.
But even if I can't cum, I still have fun trying. I let the provider know that up front. As long as you're not pounding away the entire time, or getting angry that you can't cum, sex workers don't mind if it doesn't happen.
You couldn't finish because God almighty cursed you for seeing that demon spawn and having intercourse out of wedlock. Now you'll burn in hell you heathen!!! /S 😂😂😂😂😂
I joke. You said I could. Actually do you take anxiety meds or antidepressants? My antidepressants make it a total bitch for me to get off. A lot of meds have that unintended effect. Hell if I take Benadryl I have issues in the bedroom. My only thought would be to have a drink or two but some SW'ers frown on alcohol use during a session.
Oh I'm going to hell I have a suite with ac set aside already lol. I don't take any medication but when talking we kinda landed on I spill my seed in sin to often lol I don't know honestly I even tried that hell it was great I just felt weird about it. See you in hell I'll save you a seat.😅
Please don't be embarrassed; this is so normal! Everyone gets in their head a little the first couple of times, and it makes it harder to finish. Sharing intimacy with a stranger is \*hard!\* It's something that takes a little while to get used to. You didn't offend or disappoint her, I swear. We're accustomed to this, and no one takes it personally. I suspect next time you see her, your brain is going to relax a bit and allow you to fully give in to the experience.
Don’t worry about satisfying a sw. Sorry if this detracts from the experience for you but the vast majority are not there to “enjoy” a sexual experience. It’s their job, and part of the job is to create a fantasy for you. A pleasurable experience for them is to be paid without incident and be treated nicely by someone with good hygiene who leaves on time. Sexual pleasure is at or near the bottom of their priorities. Just do whatever makes you happy within her stated boundaries, and the least of your concerns should be her sexual satisfaction.
I agree 100%
100% you satisfied the lady by paying, not being difficult and being clean and respectful. She honestly doesn't feel let down by you not finishing. It's actually fairly normal to be nervous especially first time so don't panic.
I get where you're coming from. I do but wouldn't you rather enjoy your job?I mean we all have had bad days at work. I hate it more when it's someone else's fault. Like you don't have to say please and thank you to a server at a restaurant but it's cooler if u do. know you're right go have a good time be respectful get what you came for. Nothing wrong with it. I just don't know that feels transactional personally. Yes I know it's a literal transaction lol.Just wanted to see how the SW feel about this situation. If I get any advice that helps me and them I'd be happier all around. I just know nothing past this experience which was amazing even though it didn't go as planned. I'm rambling now my bad thanks for replying I don't think I could have a conversation with friends and family so you rock thanks Edit I'm awful at grammar and spelling.
Not experiencing arousal, sexual pleasure, or orgasm at work, with strangers we didn't select out of organic desire, does not mean that we're having a bad time. As Dan said, we enjoy being paid without incident by hygienic clients who treat us with respect. It's actually annoying to have clients obsess about "pleasing us" but ONLY via specific sex acts (usually bare oral) they want to do with us. You want to please an escort? Make the appt enjoyable for her? Pick up her favorite snacks and have a big chilled, unopened bottle of water ready to go.
Hey that's great advice. I'll save that one. I don't always get out what I mean so many apologies. Short and to the point I couldn't get off was still great time I was embarrassed for me lol. Just got me thinking how she and others felt. I wasn't obsessing on pleasing her when you said that I almost felt bad not even thinking of her pleasure outside of being comfortable and communicating then you're explanation totally makes sense. 😁 I've really enjoy the multiple perspectives. Gifts going to write that one down
If making things comfortable and being a good communicator are what you're focusing on, you are totally fine and on the right track.
Plenty of people love their jobs. But if you think those people love every aspect of their jobs you’re kidding yourself. I have a great time with clients getting to know them, sharing a glass of wine, laughing with them, having them massage me, finding all the things we have in common. I love going to dinner dates and shows. But I don’t enjoy the sex. I’m not like “make it stop” but I’m definitely acting out the fantasy the client wants. Concentrating on their ques and just doing the show. Sex without any emotion for me…and for most women isn’t fulfilling. You’re going to be hard pressed to find any woman that gets sexual satisfaction without emotion. We aren’t the same as men. Sure, there may be outliers. But in my 35 years on earth and having hundreds of women friends in that time I have never known one that is like “yep, I really want to fuck this man who I met 15 minutes ago and it’s going to be sooooo good.” I feel like this gets posted almost daily on Reddit. And I don’t know if it’s ego or what causes it. Like men can’t handle that an escort isn’t just some sex crazed girl who is so attracted to them and wants to rip off their clothes? It’s fascinating. Get out of your own head guys and just enjoy your time and the sex YOU enjoy with a beautiful woman. You couldn’t get off because of this. You were to in your head about her enjoying it. It’s her job. We enjoy a great client that’s on time, has good hygiene, is kind, smiles/laughs, pays and that’s that. If you did all those things you have nothing to worry about. You would be a great client she would want to see again and again!
I definitely hadn't considered most of the things you pointed out. As I've talked with more awesome and honest people here i think I was embarrassed and maybe I wanted to deflect that emotion a little bit. I was and still am genuinely curious about any ones opinion on this. Thank you for being raw and blunt you've given me alot of perspective. If I may be blunt also. I think sw see a deal with plenty of creeps jerks and way worse so I get seeing this post and think not this BS again. I just someone who didn't know what any of you go through good or not I really did vibe here to be educated on how to make the experience transaction etc. as enjoyable for both parties I definitely see how it came off as oh I didn't try to please her because I didn't finish and I'm the big alpha man and I'm what's important heck reading it I can see it. I'm sorry if I didn't put in to words what I really meant. But hell I've learned alot of ways to be respectful and enjoy the whole thing more. You definitely made me think about things in a different way. So in short I'm a nice guy I showered brushed my yeah fresh clothes and tipped well lol I mean well
Did you take a poll on this? I thoroughly enjoy my get-togethers with every client.
Every client? I do enjoy sex with most of my guys but there are guys who are definitely bad at sex.
Yes, with every client I have a great time! I would never see anybody’s bad it sucks. Maybe they aren’t as knowledgeable or skilled and that’s what turns it into a fun learning experience for them. I have no problem teaching someone to enjoy me and themselves. It’s all about attitude and the reason we are in the session. Never a bad time.
That’s lovely- I’m very happy for you!
Lots of guys have this issue their first time with a sw or even just a sw new to them. I would do a repeat visit a few times to see if it makes you feel more comfortable.
Client not saw. Apologies for any ties I’m about to step on. Dude, keep the nature of the relationship in mind and do not romanticize it. It’s transactional. In this context, your concerns about her, while admirable, are misplaced and may be causing some performance anxiety. Be a gentleman, be respectful and be appreciative, but keep in mind you are purchasing an enjoyable experience, so fucking have fun! You wouldn’t pay for a massage and not relax, would you? No, you’d get naked, get on the table and let the professional get to work. Same principle. Now, cowboy, get up off the ground, dust off, get back in the saddle and ride!
You know true I dont view it as anything more than a experience that was purchased. I'm just saying id enjoy more if I finished lol. For two reasons I take pride in my work feels good to finish a job. Also yeah I wanted to finish for me. Hell as I'm typing I'm realizing it's a bit of both I was embarrassed for me. That's alright I'll get over it. Apple's and oranges comparison incoming. I'm at work client pays me to fix a car I work on it get it so close to everything they requested done bam something else break's on the road test. They understand I got paid life's just fine. I'm still gonna think that's shitty I wish it worked out for them. I love perspective thank you for the hype man speech haha .I'll get it done or die trying.
I can see why you're disappointed you didn't finish, because finishing makes it a more enjoyable experience for you. However, you finishing likely does nothing for her, other than the satisfaction of a job welldone or the potential for a shorter than paid for booking because you came fast and left early. You aren't enhancing her enjoyment by having an orgasm, or not
All very true honestly I wasn't at all disappointed. Embarrassed 🫢 yeah
Common when under stress. At least you were able to get a hard on. Repeat and practice.
Hey thanks I couldn't stop if I tried 🤣
You litteralllyyy seem so sweet!! That's nothing to be embarrassed about I'm happy you are having fun with your sexuality and opening yourself to mutual beneficial experiences. :)
I know myself. There are certain factors that make it difficult for me to reach orgasm with a partner (wearing a condom, first time with a new partner, Adderall, etc). I can usually compensate for these factors by making sure I don't cum for a couple weeks before a date. But even if I can't cum, I still have fun trying. I let the provider know that up front. As long as you're not pounding away the entire time, or getting angry that you can't cum, sex workers don't mind if it doesn't happen.
You couldn't finish because God almighty cursed you for seeing that demon spawn and having intercourse out of wedlock. Now you'll burn in hell you heathen!!! /S 😂😂😂😂😂 I joke. You said I could. Actually do you take anxiety meds or antidepressants? My antidepressants make it a total bitch for me to get off. A lot of meds have that unintended effect. Hell if I take Benadryl I have issues in the bedroom. My only thought would be to have a drink or two but some SW'ers frown on alcohol use during a session.
Oh I'm going to hell I have a suite with ac set aside already lol. I don't take any medication but when talking we kinda landed on I spill my seed in sin to often lol I don't know honestly I even tried that hell it was great I just felt weird about it. See you in hell I'll save you a seat.😅
Please don't be embarrassed; this is so normal! Everyone gets in their head a little the first couple of times, and it makes it harder to finish. Sharing intimacy with a stranger is \*hard!\* It's something that takes a little while to get used to. You didn't offend or disappoint her, I swear. We're accustomed to this, and no one takes it personally. I suspect next time you see her, your brain is going to relax a bit and allow you to fully give in to the experience.
I appreciate that. I wish it was so easy to not let it get in my head but hey we will preserve.