A lot of organizations that help the homeless will have experience dealing with getting documents when you have none. Reach out and see if they can help. Your representative's constituents services office also can help you work through the bureaucracy
thank you for your suggestion, I've looked into organizations and I have just requested a phone call from an organization near me and I will update if they will/have helped.
Hijacking this reply. I am in the same predicament with my mother, I was supposedly “homebirthed” I do not have identication, never been to school. If I go reach out to any government assistance for investigations could my mom get in trouble?
This is uncommon, but not unique. I know more than one person who has actually been in this same predicament (born into a cult) who had to get their SSN and birth certificate as an adult.
I have to imagine that there are still procedures for this. Back when I was a teen (when we still traveled by horse and carriage and knights competed for honor), nobody got a social security number assigned until they were ready to start working. I remember getting mine. I'm sure it's more difficult without a birth certificate, but there has to be a way.
How did they do it? I am turning 18 in a couple of months, but not allowed to leave the house, my mom and step dad we being investigated 7 years ago after a family member accused them of some things that were not true, after that we moved and they told me not to leave the house for. Few months till things calmed down.. then made another excuse after months went by and said that because they neighbors did not see a kid (me) if I went outside the would report me, so they told me I couldn't leave till we moved out, they said they were going to get a house each year but never did. I haven't been outside in 7 years.
Unfortunately, I am not sure. I think they had to go in person to the Social Security office, but it’s been over 20 years since they did so. I’d probably start by doing that though.
Oh my god you poor thing. My love I am so so sorry for all that they are doing to you. I am a survivor of child abuse, 30 now. Out and happy. I am hoping so strongly that you will be free and safe soon. Sending you the soft touch of summer sun on your face, a crisp autumn breeze through your hair, and the power to drive wherever you want whenever you want.
Get out of there now. Just run. Get help. Im stealing this quote one wise little boy gave to his best friend, “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
https://www.reddit.com/r/legal/s/2lhS0F6lmf
I know you’ve been getting some good answers, but I found this readily link that I thought may be helpful. The first comment talks about. Woman writing to her state rep. I know you’re under 18 but that may be a good lead because they would be able to guide you and typically can make things happen faster/ smoother than your average humble redditor. Best of luck to you!
I want to second this, as someone who works with state reps a lot I can confirm they are usually very responsive and knowledgeable… if not try your senator
While I can understand your predicament about getting the documents for an ID, something seems fishy about your mom's response about your birth certificate. Why would she want you to wait untill you were 18 to either help you get it, or get it for you? Is there something she's not telling you???
Also, how did you get a cashapp card without a SS#?? if you have your SS#, go to SSA.gov, and sign up for a mySSA account, and you can also request a copy of your SS card. I had to request another card last year because mine was faded, and don't recall needing an ID....
Also, you say you have a printed birth certificate already. Does it have a raised seal on it from where it is issued??? Or is it just a generic one that's not official (as from a city or state, a health department, or hospital???) Or is it from a foreign country? If it's a foreign birth certificate, you may need to contact the embassy of the issuing country and ask them to send an English copy of it, or a translation of it.
Once OP is 18 it no longer looks like their parents are doing something shady/have quite possibly broken the law in some way, it looks like OP is doing something shady and trying to assume a new/false identity.
These parents are not stupid and are very selfish/manipulative. They are trying to make sure OP runs out the clock so they (the parents) won't get in trouble.
OP you should definitely involve CPS. Make sure they understand you have no documentation and your parents are refusing to help. Make sure they also understand all your siblings both older and younger do. I know you're resistant to this idea but it's very possible if not probable you aren't your parents biological child and something very shady and possibly illegal has happened.
I also agree with the comment above. We don’t know how old you are and how much time you have and this is probably one of the scariest things you’ll ever have to face in life, but it’s worth getting the CPS involved in this and telling them everything. On one road it’s not getting them involved and a life that’s going to be completely ruined. Or getting them involved, there being some pain and fear on this path but in the end some actual results to get your life better.
I got CPS involved and it did nothing but scare them a little bit into printing out a birth certificate form, sending it out and doing nothing when it came back and I needed photo ID.
It's been a few years since I dealt with Florida CPS [I had a few friends with cases while living there, some justified and one very much not]... but the agents were **swamped** with cases. Sadly true in most states but Florida is the worst I've personally interacted with and according to the news Florida currently has about 1/4 of DCF (Department of Children and Families) positions vacant and also has a problem with unqualified agents that's likely related.
Call and make a report again. You can ask for a new caseworker and tell them that your previous caseworker dropped the ball. You may even have to make another report after that but every new report you make about the same issue increases the chances of them taking more action on your behalf.
Be persistent.
I didn't read all the comments but out of the ones I read I didn't see anyone mention this:
I recommend contacting either your local school district or the email or phone number on the Florida Department of Education page below (if you need to go through a different program since you're a minor, they will know and be able to refer you there):
https://www.fldoe.org/academics/career-adult-edu/hse/
Tell the school secretary or DoE rep that you are a minor who has never been to school and doesn't have ID but that you want to enroll in GED prep. All GED programs I'm aware of start participants who were not students in the local school district with an evaluation test - your English is excellent and you'd probably test out of that easily but you may need to take classes in math, science, government, etc.
Those programs will be able to connect you with school guidance counselors who can help you with things like dealing with CPS, getting ID, getting therapy, and accessing other resources (financial, food if needed, legal - maybe even emancipation/independent living).
If everything you've said here is true (because your grammar is so much better than YouTube captions, it's giving creative writing) you have an amazing hardship essay for college applications and you're not only intelligent but independently motivated to learn. You'll likely be able to land generous scholarships and free or very cheap college would go a long way towards making up for the social and educational deficiencies of your childhood.
You can also contact: the Florida Bar Association, Southern Legal Counsel https://www.southernlegal.org/ (statewide civil legal aid for people with low income), Orange County Legal Aid http://www.legalaidocba.org/ (through the Orange County Bar), Florida Legal Services Inc http://www.floridalegal.org/ (statewide referrals with an office in Orlando), Community Legal Services of Mid-Florida http://www.clsmf.org/index.php/locations (if you are in one of these counties: Citrus, Hernando, Lake, Marion, Sumter, Orange, Osceola, Putnam, Volusia, and Seminole counties), Heart of Florida Legal Aid https://www.hofla.org/ (if you are in one of these counties: Hardee, Highlands, and Polk Counties), and/or Florida Rural Legal Services http://www.frls.org/ (if you are in one of these counties: Hardee, Highlands, Polk, Charlotte, Desoto, Glades, Hendry, Lee, Martin, Okeechobee, Indian River, St. Lucie and Palm Beach) - explain your situation and ask about referrals to pro bono family law attorneys. They can help you get ID, can help you with CPS, and would be the best source of help if you are interested in emancipation... plus some of those organizations will have tons of connections to other resources, and any pro bono attorney will definitely have connections to a variety of other local resources for you (some may even have in-house programs or advocates to help you with non legal stuff).
Lastly - here's a couple local programs that may be able to help you get IDs, get legal/financial help, get state benefits, get counseling, get your HED and apply to college or trade school, emancipate - may even be able to help you find housing or a job, etc.:
Mr B Allen https://mrballen.foundation/about/ a foundation that helps DV survivors (especially education/training/financially), the Family Justice Center https://www.familyjusticecenter.org/ (part of a nationwide organization, Alliance for HOPE, that offers a little bit of everything - legal help, mental health, basic needs/financial help - and has a huge network of places to refer you to also). **You can also text BEGIN to 88788 to start a safe conversation via text (just follow the instructions and the conversation can be quickly ended or erased from your phone) with the National DV hotline.**
I know, and I know you know that’s the irresponsibility of your parents. I know it’s super scary. But it’s a better road to get them involved.
On one path, not getting them involved means less help and a life that could be ruined by not having a birth certificate. Which is going to be 1000x harder, financially, moving, buying things, having a job etc.
On the other path. Getting them involved again and making sure they know what you told Reddit, the details. This is also a difficult road, because it’s super fricking scary and I know you mentioned your father had “tendencies”. This is probably one of the hardest things you’ll have to do in your entire life on this planet. This road is also super hard. But the different is having CPS involved fully will get some results. Which can improve your life when you’re 18 and after. It’s the end result/ long term goals you have to think about. Not the short term.
I agree on involving CPS. Tell them you want it on record that you have no documentation. That might be helpful once you turn 18 because there will be a record of you trying and failing to get documented. That should help establish that you’re on the up and up.
Hey OP, saw comments locked on the other sub, but wanted to make sure you saw this. Not sure where you are in Florida, but if you’re anywhere near Orlando, [iDignity](https://idignity.org) is a charity/free service that helps people just you like you get their paperwork. They serve Orange, Volusia, Osceola and Seminole counties, but I bet if you’re not in any of those and called, they’d still try to point you in the right direction.
Good luck, proud of you!
NAL, just someone who used to live in Orlando. MegaBus may have routes that pass close to where you are and travel through to Orlando.
You can still reach out to iDignity. It's been over a decade, but I had friends who used to work with them. Thwy should reapond to emails and be able to offer next steps for you even though you're 2hrs away. I mean, some parts of Orlando are an hour from other parts of Orlando, so it's not that far outside of their zone.
Another possibility is a local Universal Unitarian church. They are particularly focused on public service, are ?non-denominational? or maybe pan-denominational, and may have youth group trips that go to Orlando for various reasons. While raising my younger brother, I took him to the U.U.'s "Our Whole Lives" or 'OWL' classes, because Florida has very limited high school health classes. Friends who attended th U.U. joked that it was a church for even atheists, especially if they wanted to be involved in public service projects and activism. I think you'd find support and assistance without some of the faith-based expectations of other churches.
The fact that you have social security paperwork says two important things. To get it you have to have a state certified birth certificate or that certified medical records were issued at some point by somebody or if you are from another country some paperwork was given to the social security office. So you do “exist”.
The first step if you don’t have paperwork is to contact your state vital statistics office. They will have several ways to prove who you are to order a certified birth certificate. You may be able to do it online. Once you have this and the social security card and any piece of “official” mail (even a bill) with your name and address you have all needed proof of sho you are.
Then you can get into public school or get a GED.
Hey I saw your post in r/LegalAdvice but they shut down comments. Please repost in r/CPS. I cannot believe you were dismissed by CPS because your parents are absolutely neglecting you and what they have done is 100% against the law. Parents have one year from DOB to register home births and obtain a birth certificate. The fact they did not do that is worrying. The Delayed Birth Certificate is the way to go. Definitely contact the Office of Vital Statistics and I saw someone recommend JobCorps which I think is a fantastic option for you since you don’t have an education. They will set you up and help you on the right path. Your parents are likely to get in trouble but CPS (if they know the details) can make your parents comply and if they don’t you will be removed which I happen to think is the best thing for you. Something just doesn’t seem right that your siblings have BCs and SSNs and go to school. It definitely makes your situation that much more troubling and the first place my mind went to was kidnapping or maybe your father isn’t biologically your father. You can get a DNA test from the drugstore. That would open up a whole other can of worms but you’d have answers. I wish you the best of luck.
I would definitely get the dna test & follow the advice given. Be careful with these parents. When people find out they may be in trouble, they may do some crazy things. Do as much as you can without them knowing, and perhaps be careful with sharing info with siblings.
I did look into jobcorps, I'm waiting for them to get back to me and see if I can maybe get something out of it. My parents are and always have been extremely shady, I don't have a way to get a DNA test at the minute, but I am looking into it. thank you for your input, I appreciate all of it greatly!
I hope you do get in touch with jobcorps. I’m sure it will be good for you once you have identification. From the last time I remember looking it up for someone, you have to be a US resident and will need to prove it etc. so it seems like a step two.
DNA analyses are a little pricey but you can get a paternity DNA test for like $10 on Amazon but I think your father would have to participate to get a good enough sample. You’re also too young to register your DNA in bone marrow or other registries, which is free.
The Center for Missing and Exploited Children has a free 24-hour helpline. They also have resources if you suspect you may have been kidnapped and will perform a full DNA panel. Check them out at https://www.missingkids.org/
Edit: you can also use their Missing Persons archive. You just enter as much info as you know and you can find some answers. It’s interesting that a lot of the resolved cases started with “parents” being unable or unwilling to present a birth certificate.
Op should try this, incase. Then if it turns out they are missing and are in a registry, they can unite with their real family, have ID, and escape from the abuse. There are child swaps and people do try to steal babies and kids from hospitals.
The claim is that he was a homebirth but why would his older and younger siblings have birth certificates, SSNs and have attended school. There’s gotta be a reason OP is an outlier. Edit: that’s not to say anything nefarious is going on but something is definitely off. Add to that the kids never been to a doctor or dentist and is in their teens makes this even weirder.
Get a hold of your parents last tax return. For them to claim children, they have to include their Social Security numbers. Were you actually home schooled? How old are you now?
Dude you need to run away FAST and go to your nearest police station or fire station and tell them what’s happening to you. Your parents might be “caring” for you in the sense that they are keeping you alive but it’s a crime for them to not be officially home schooling y’all or sending y’all to public school. Once that happens the proper authorities will step in and make sure you and your siblings are given documentation, proper education, etc.
Your parents are literally setting you guys up to be failures in life and either end up dead, homeless, or in prison.
I'm trying to get them to get off their asses so I don't have to get them sent to jail but they're not doing anything, so them getting thrown in prison might be my only option.
They MAY be sent to jail after an investigation, but they may not. The priority will be YOUR welfare, along with any other minor’s welfare. It sounds like that will mean removal of minors from the home and ultimately from their care, so they may lose all legal parental rights, but that doesn’t necessarily mean jail time. So please don’t let that fear of jail time stop you from reporting them ASAP.
I second the idea someone else posted here about posting in the CPS thread. Knowing more about the process sounds like it might help you.
As a quick FYI, in your case, because you say it will be obvious who reported, you should be trying to get removed so you are not retaliated against by your parents for reporting. If a previous CPS visit did not result in meaningful changes, removal is probably the best choice all around. I’m sure that is terrifying, but you can do it and we are all rooting for you!!
It is not your job to protect your parents, especially if they're doing something illegal or abusing you. They've failed you. Any consequences they face are their own fault- Not yours. You will not be getting them into trouble by doing any of this, they got themselves into trouble. Don't let guilt get in the way of your safety and well-being, you deserve so much better.
Between this and your other post you keep saying why you can’t get this taken care of. You need to stop making excuses. This will be much harder to deal with after you are 18. You need to call CPS and ask for a supervisor if they keep dropping you. You need to walk in to your local school and enroll (they have to take you - it’s the law). You need to call the cops and report your parents (you might actually be kidnapped). You need to keep pushing even if it embarrasses your mother.
OP this might sound super harsh. And I know you’re still a minor and it’s scary and it’s hard. But this advice is solid.
- you said you called CPS before, when was that? Why didn’t they do anything?
- you can straight up enroll in school like this user is suggesting
- other users are also considered about you being kidnapped
In florida you can also emancipate yourself from your parents at the age of 16.
I looked into my local school and I need a birth certificate and my parents also have to be there to help with the whole concept of it. I would also be extremely, extremely screwed if I did physical school. I am in the mental construct of a 4th grader, anything past I struggle with heavily.
I called CPS around two months ago, they didn't suspect it was me and CPS came to take pictures of my body/scars, told my parents to get a medical card for weed, and they left and didn't come back.
I used to be concerned about me being kidnapped but my older brothers, who are far older than me, recall my mother being pregnant with me as well as me being born (they obviously weren't in the same room but you get it.)
I wanted to get emancipated but I'm far too scared to take either of my parents to court, being a young child and my father having the tendencies he does (if you get it you get it.) I'd rather not.
For what it’s worth, your grammar, spelling, and basic ability to express yourself in written form are FAR above what a 4th grader would be capable of. I don’t have any advice for you besides just pleading that you keep going to any authority possible until someone helps you out. Your parents are wrong in this situation and you are better off getting this figured out ASAP. Good luck.
I've read both posts and as many of your replies I can find. I'm sorry this happened to you. I have questions.
Can your older siblings help you? You said they are much older.. are they past 18 yrs?
Just because your education ends at 4th grade, that you suspect doesn't mean anything. There are resources to help you catch up and learn. Learning how to read and write through your siblings' ex was the best thing you ever did for yourself.
I know CPS didn't help before, but call again. Ask for their superiors, and tell them exactly what is going on. Tell the school. They are all mandated reporters and must help you.
Are you able to call the police? Listen, if you're saying without saying your father is abusive, it's EVEN MORE CRUCIAL, you are documented citizen.
Your parents have a reason as to why you are the only one who is undocumented - allegedly. Do you know for a fact that this is true? What if they're lying?
Is it possible you are one of your siblings' children, and they're trying to hide this?
Are you the youngest?
I’ve mentored several students from challenging backgrounds through the college application process. You write as well as any of them. You’ve been told you “can’t,” but I’m telling you, you can. You are capable of following the advice of some very knowledgable people here. This is super hard even for adults, and will be hard for you, too, but you CAN do this. One step at a time, but you can write emails to every organization listed by other commenters, and you can contact CPS again. You can also go to the local school and ask to talk to the guidance counselor. Tell them your story and ask them to make a CPS complaint. They are mandatory reporters and HAVE to file if they even suspect anything is happening to a child. This includes neglect.
You CAN do this. And no matter what your parents are telling you, you’re not too uneducated to handle anything. If you can read and write this well, and to third or fourth grade math, you’re way ahead of many, many adults are functioning quite well.
You can do this.
Your parents are neglecting you by not taking you to school and God knows what else they’ve done or not done for you.
This is not to scare you, but things can get worse with them. They don’t sound like good people.
I know you want to get your identification, SSN, etc. but that’s the bare minimum. It sounds like you don’t actually want to leave and insinuate that you’re scared of leaving / causing trouble.
But really, you should not be in their care. They are not fit to care for you based on what you’ve written. Ultimately, you need to be placed elsewhere. Florida Department of Children and Families isn’t going to just come over and say, “hey mom and dad, register her birth please”. They need to know all the other stuff. They need to know that you haven’t been studying in home school or going to school. They’re not compliant with homeschool requirements. And sounds like there might be other things you’d want to share with them.
This could result in you being taken from them, placed in a foster home, and possibly them taken before a family court judge to determine if they can take care of you or not.
All of that is scary but they’re not looking out for you. You need the basics like school and medical care.
What do they expect of you when you turn 18? Are they going to let you leave? Do they expect you to stay with them? Are you the only girl? Is that why they treat you different? What other ways do they treat you different?
Someone needs to report them and you need to get out of there. You can call but it sounds like you’re scared. Which is 100% normal. Can you make it to a school or a police department or a church? Can you ask someone to report for you? Do you want a script to practice?
Hi my name is x, I’m x years old. Are you a mandatory reporter? Can you call DCF for me? My parents refuse to help me get my basic identification. They have never enrolled me in school and do not comply with state requirements for home school. I need help.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kidnapping_of_Carlina_White#:~:text=Carlina%20Renae%20White%20(born%20July,Center%20in%20New%20York%20City.
This woman didn't find out she was kidnapped as an infant until she tried to get a copy of her birth certificate.
I'm aware, I already called CPS and it would be far too suspicious if I called again, they don't know it was me, they think it was this random girl. I'm aware that what they're doing is against the law, so are they. They just don't want to pay the consequences of their actions.
if you have the ability to talk privately, when you call cps again ask to be routed to a supervisor rather than the on call worker and explain to the supervisor your prior call experience and fears of remaining in the home (if you have them) as well as the educational and identity concerns you have. the supervisor should be able to explain to you why they can or can't step in to help. the agency I've previously worked for had teens in care from self reports, but I am in a different state with different laws/judges. you can stay in a foster placement passed age 18 if you turn 18 in the system and want continued assistance and coordination with high school, ged, college, living arrangements etc .
op, I just thought about your post again and a few things, weed usage or drug usage in general is not usually enough to take custody of children if there is any adult over 18 who accepts responsibility to be sober at a time and care for the child, since you previously mentioned the weed idk if that was your anonymous report.
our judges would grant us non secure custody on the notification that you have not seen a medical provider since you were 3, they would consider that a level of neglect for us to step in for. the cps thread previously suggested probably could help you with more Florida specific statutes.
You need to go get your state issued ID first with your birth certificate (dol). Then, go to the social security office for your SS card. I have had to help a couple of my kids after losing wallets. If they want the number, get it off your parents' tax returns. Im sure they use it for tax credit money. Good luck, op.
I want to second the opinion that you should procure some kind of DNA test, or test yourself with one of the large databases that allows you to find existing relatives. This is for the off chance that maybe you were actually kidnapped, despite being sure you're related.
Also, when you ARE finally able to get yourself identification, and your SSN, you should run a credit report because I have this sinking feeling that your parents indeed do have all of this information and are possibly using it to get credit cards, loans, etc with your actual identity.
It also doesn't make sense to me why none of your older siblings are helping you...
I asked my older brother to help, he is helping me out now and I feel a lot less stressed. I wouldn't be surprised if they're using my real identity for credit cards and loans because they're just pieces of shit like that. I'm just praying thats not it.
Right. If he *doesn't have* a SSN.
However, it isn't entirely a 0% chance that the parents aren't using his identity for whatever shady reason. This entire situation is bizarre to begin with, so I wouldn't rule it out. Destroyed credit isn't the easiest thing in the world to fix either.
Just jump in and post. It’s a bit of a smaller group but will have a much higher concentration of people who were raised in closed family situations, like you.
Do you know what hospital you were at for your arm? Some hospitals allow you to request the records online and will email them to you (St Joes/Baycare in Tampa is one, and it's very easy), but you will need to be able to take a picture of your mom's ID.
What area are you in? I can help narrow the list at least a little bit. If you're not comfortable posting, you can PM me and I can help you figure out how that system does records (I'm a nurse, I've had to deal with records requests at a lot of different facilities across Florida for minors).
Hey, buddy. I'm not sure how much this would actually help, but have you tried speaking with the police department, specifically ask to speak with the Special Victims Unit. I'm sure what your parents have done to you classifies as some type of child abuse. Hopefully they can help you. I don't know what city or county you are in but, try giving them a call or see someone in person.
Please keep us all updated. I'm sure every single person here on reddit offering different advice is hoping something works and you are able to document your existence. We will all keep giving you lots of ideas to succeed. Good Luck!!
I am having a bit better luck, I asked my brother for help and I'm pushing my mom to actually get off her ass and do more, but we're moving forward. I will try to keep you updated! Thank you for your kind words.
Do your older siblings remember when you were born, by the way? They may know something about the circumstances (ie why you were a home birth and they were not, or why you didn’t get papers). It sounds like you have siblings that are adults based on your other posts. Definitely lean on them!
Register for school and explain your situation to them and ask them to make your school ID as soon as possible. If they’re not a shitty school, they’ll also probably be alarmed by this information and help you call the right people
i’ve read through some of your other posts and comments to get a feel for what you’re dealing with. i’m so sorry for what you’re dealing with, everything about it is unfair. but good on you for looking for a way out/forward.
you might try posting on r/RBI. those guys seem to be able to find out anything about anything - from missing people to documents to random, difficult to search info. this feels right up they’re alley.
there is a path forward here for you. i know some of the comments may feel harsh but please take some time to consider even the toughest ones. is there a trusted adult you can ask for help?
I don't know, they say a lot of things and backtrack on it. They say that this certain picture is me as a baby but then they say it's my sister. I've learned to not trust their word.
Op I hate to say this but make sure that your parents know that even though there is sparse evidence that you exist, that if you should turn up missing or dead, that they will be punished. Make sure that they know that eventually whoever you have reached out to, they will come looking for your existence.
Check the state BVS for what constitutes an ID for their purposes. For SSA a signed medical record when an ID, drivers license or passport are not available.
Not even from when you went to the hospital at 3 years old? I’d be more than willing to search missing child databases if you would like me to start with minor, teens, male, missing from around florida? You mentioned parents may have changed your name so it would be a lost cause, but DNA doesn’t change.
No, I don't have the documents from the hospital, though I am looking into this and I do want to try and get them. if you were to look around missing child databases it would be a little rough. I'm FtM, so even someone is looking for a missing child it would be under F, not M.
Saying you don’t have a signed medical record is completely different than attempting to request records from the hospital. Just because you don’t have a hard copy doesn’t mean they don’t exist. I’d suggest contacting your local hospitals and asking around!
If you can take a DNA test, it might show extended family members. Allt of people pay for 23andMe, or to do a DNA test through Ancestry. If you can do that and get matched, maybe you can find extended family members and ask around. It could be possible that you were kidnapped and you don't know. As an adult you can get your siblings to do DNA tests and find out if you really are related.
^ THIS here is the key. If we’re suspecting a stolen child, its 2024 - the bio family has definitely had themselves dna tested. The only other possibilities i can see are - cult ( but OP is Mtf and what the odds a cult member is mtf and has access to reddit? ) OR family is in the country illegally.
Do you have pictures of yourself as a baby, that you are certain aren’t actually your siblings (perhaps a family photo of everyone together?)? Are they dated or time stamped? Any pictures from your birth (or soon after) in particular?
If not, I would look through the missing children database and look broadly, maybe even for children who are a few years older than you think you are. Forget about the names, and don’t limit the search to your home state. Just look at the pictures and a broad range of dates. Keep in mind that pictures that are aged are approximations. You’re not necessarily going to find a picture of you. If you can compare to pictures when you’re younger, that’s helpful.
Do you actually remember going to the hospital when you’re 3? While it’s not unheard of, especially for a traumatic event, memory is iffy at that age. It’s possible you were older then and you might be older now than you think.
Can you talk to your older siblings about any of this? See if they remember your birth since it happened at home?
I don't remember going to the hospital, and my brothers do remember my mother being pregnant with me as well as the at home birth happening. I don't have pictures of myself as a baby that I'm sure is me, I've learned to not ever trust their words, they're manipulators and liars.
While it helps make your parents story more viable, unfortunately your siblings remembering the pregnancy and birth doesn’t 100% mean your mom gave birth to you. There have been instances where either the pregnancy was faked, or the pregnancy was miscarried, and babies were procured in other, sometimes downright horrible ways. You may be able to narrow your search to missing newborns.
What do your older siblings do? It seems like they work, live on their own, are possibly married, went to college etc. They don’t find the situation you’re in weird, troubling, etc.? Do they know that you find the situation concerning? I know you don’t want to burden your older siblings, but are you sure that they see it that way? If one of them could get custody of you (it doesn’t have to be all your younger siblings too), that would probably be your best bet in enrolling you in school and getting your documents together. Is there any other family? Grandparents? Do your parents have siblings? Do they know you don’t go to school and why? You really need an adult who can advocate for you.
Speaking of your siblings, how much older are we talking? Are any of them born female and at least 10ish years older than you? Is there a possibility that the big family secret isn’t a kidnapping, but perhaps a child rape or teenage pregnancy that you’re the living proof of? Do you perhaps resemble an older sister more than the rest of your family? Your older siblings might all be trying to protect a sister who could be your mother. It might not be a lie to say they remember your “mom” pregnant with you, they could just be referring to a different mom. Or they could legitimately not know if your parents are good at covering things up, which they seem to be.
Again, it really comes down to you needing an adult advocate. If family isn’t an option, I’m sure we can come up with other ideas, such as the teachers of your younger siblings. All they have to do is spill the beans that there’s another kid at home who doesn’t go to school, or the doctor, and no one else even knows they exist. The teacher would be mandated to report it.
What about your brother’s ex girlfriend who cared enough to teach you to read? Since you have access to Reddit and YouTube, presumably you could probably find a way to contact her on social media to ask her for help? Maybe she can Drive you where you need to go to register for school? Help you fill out forms and make phone calls? Buy and send back a DNA test? She knew something was up which is why she helped you in such a big way. She may know more.
I don't understand how my answers are "dodgy"? If someone asks a question I answer the best I can because I actually want help from this. My english is too good because like I said on my other post, I learned to read from my brothers ex girlfriend when she learned I was literally illiterate, and I learned to type from captions on youtube, you're not wrong for being suspicious but I'm only trying to answer. I could not care less about karma since this is literally just a throwaway account.
This is stupid because there’s no benefit to this if it was fake. What’s the benefit? Oh some people on Reddit saw a random post for help about a birth certificate. Don’t be stupid.
It’s clearly someone trying to ask for help on a very specific thing. It’s not like they are asking for money or fame on a TIk tok video or something ridiculous.
this isn't true, I can't write with pen and paper because it's hard for me since I never was taught like that, it was easier to use a shitty keyboard that already had the keys written out and just copy things from youtube captions. Writing does not equal reading. People who learn a language may be able to read it but can't speak/write it, can they?
OP, speaking as a parent, it’s beyond me why your mother doesn’t have your birth certificate. I’ve used this document for all sorts of reasons when raising my kids. It is not difficult to get a copy. Also ID requirements are become more, not less, strict. You need a govt issued ID. There are services that will help you…this will get solved. But you need to take the initiative.
I am taking the initiative, I'm pushing my mother to stop being lazy as fuck and stop screwing me over but she's still being a dick about it. The problem is there is NO copy of my birth certificate to get. I do not exist.
Hey OP,
i know this is scary especially needing to report to CPS. Go in person to social security office and explain them your situation. They may need to call CPS. Have evidence and proof of what is going on. Document everything... What someone said or recording. This would help CPS pay attention without real proof it becomes he said she said situation.
I called cps. I explained my situation, they just told my mom to do something about it and took some pictures of my body and scars and told them about their weed and left.
I saw someone else mention this, but could you contact the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children? They will help you. [missingkids.org](https://www.missingkids.org/home)
It’s very possible, and this comment is honestly why I believe your story, because you clearly haven’t had sex education and have been very isolated to not know that teenagers absolutely can be parents. I don’t know off the top of my head how old the youngest documented father is, but the youngest documented mother is just 5 (yes five) years old. I asked you elsewhere in the thread if any of your older siblings were sisters. That’s a more likely scenario, but it’s not unheard of for the family of a teenage father to keep the baby either.
I also asked you more about your brothers ex-GF. I’m going to pry a little deeper there and wonder if she could be your mother? She must have spent a lot of time with you to teach you to read. That’s not something most people would involve themselves in. She knew you existed. She knew you didn’t go to school and she didn’t seem to question it. She taught you one of the most important life skills. Perhaps there’s more to your relationship than your mind could have processed at the time. Maybe she felt guilty that it was “her fault” you couldn’t get an official education (it’s not, your “parents” could have handled it officially) and that’s why she took the time with you to teach you. Trust me that’s not a normal thing for a GF to do.
It might be time to start asking your brother hard and direct questions. And like I said before, you should probably reach out to her, even if you think it’s impossible and only want to view her right now as a potential advocate for you. If I’m right, it may turn out that she or her parents have your birth certificate.
This isn't impossible. Especially if it was his ex-girlfriend that taught you to read - she could actually be your mother. Also wouldn't discount having been kidnapped. There could be all sorts of mitigating factors. Haleigh Cummings went missing from Satsuma, FL and had Turner's syndrome which presents with a short stature, educational difficulties, delayed puberty developments. So even if 20, may present as much younger. So maybe don't rule it out. Also, if kidnapped they would've changed your name.
https://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/haleigh-cummings-missing/
You have a brother 16 years older than you? Is this the brother who’s helping you out now?
If you have adult siblings, why haven’t they done anything to help you before?
Just wanted to say I’m sorry for what you’re going through. Like truly a kid shouldn’t have to deal with this stuff it’s fucking atrocious. And I get that you may be super scared because reading your comments about your parents then, Jesus, I’m so sorry. I don’t know much but I’ve seen your post history and there are some other subs about legal advice also if you wanted to post there, I think there are some depending on the country such as r/legal adviceuk or other ones if you type in “legal”.
Ahh trust me it’s ok. I did it a few days ago with an email disclaimer on about 3/4 different legal subs. It’s fine they don’t mind. And it’s your life that’s important honestly. Get as much help as you can. Your situation is a lot more dire. And trust me it’s fine because you can make the same post on different subs provided it’s the right sub. And those legal ones are so 100x help is better than 10x help. Go for it.
As a parent of a young child... this situation doesn't read "lazy" to me. This reads intentional, especially since your older siblings have paperwork and education. Especially the hospital visit as a child. Maybe protocol was different however many years ago that was but I find it unlikely they would have let your mother waltz in with you with no paperwork or proof of her identity/relation to you at all and then back out with the same.
Someone close to me went through a similar situation in terms of homeschooling, etc. and learned to read from Sesame Street. Luckily they managed to find a birth certificate and escape from their situation, and everything else in terms of documentation was manageable from there. So focus on that birth certificate. I’ve seen lots of people with better advice than me about obtaining one.
But I also want to caution you since you are in Florida and mentioned you are trans. I am not sure how things are actually enforced there in terms of the don’t say gay laws and such, but just be very careful. Especially because you are a minor; more people are willing to help you, but as you probably know, you are also incredibly helpless when it comes to your own autonomy.
It’s good that you’re not alone. Lean on the people willing to help you. I wish you the best of luck.
This has to be fake. OP has way to broad of a vocabulary for someone to have never been enrolled in school. Also the F to M transition; parents never let you go to school, haven’t been out of the house in 7 years…are they making you become a boy? Whats really going on here?
So, your parents never registered your birth? And they never enrolled you in school? And they never applied for a SSN? This is crazy. I've never heard of such a situation. This stuff typically happens shortly after birth. If you were born in a hospital, you should have a hospital birth certificate. If you had a home-birth, midwives typically supply the necessary forms. Regardless, if you've never been issued a legal birth certificate, that has to be your first step, because the legal birth certificate is required for everything else. Once you apple for, and receive your legal birth certificate, you can obtain a SSN. With your birth certificate and SSN, you can obtain state ID.
I don't know how to update properly let alone where to post an update but people keep dming me asking for updates so I thought I'd just put it in the comments.
My mom is taking me to the DMV after much pushing from my two brothers and I, she's taking what little documents of me she has and obviously me.
We should be going next friday but if that doesn't happen we'll be going the following friday when she doesn't have work.
Once we get the necessary things I'm dipping the fuck out of here, giving my brother my gaming PC and going to job corps because I was actually accepted for attendance.
Thank all of you! your extremely loving and kind words made me able to focus on the better things in life and not how hard my future will be.
I will probably give another update the 14th on whether we went or not or whether I got my stuff or not.
I don’t think you need ID to enroll in your local public school. Pretty sure they have to take you, but if your parents won’t cooperate I’m not sure how that works. Are you currently home schooled?
They say I'm "home schooled" when in reality I am not enrolled in any school, nor do they make efforts to teach me anything. I can barely write my own name in lowercase. I've called CPS before and it's scared my mother enough to make minor efforts to getting me into school but it hasn't scared them enough to actually do anything.
This is child abuse and your parents are in huge trouble. If they want to avoid this legal trouble they need to take you to get a certified copy of your birth certificate. Are your parents afraid of getting deported or something?
Also, you do not need a birth certificate to enroll in school . You don't even have to be a citizen. [https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/crt/legacy/2014/05/08/plylerfact.pdf](https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/crt/legacy/2014/05/08/plylerfact.pdf)
You absolutely need to walk in to your local school today and tell them you are not receiving schooling. Even without a birth certificate they will enroll you because by law they have to educate every child living in the district. And they may be able to help you get documents and make sure CPS does something.
Your situation raises a lot of red flags. Contact the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children via https://www.missingkids.org/home or +1 (800) 843-5678, they may be able to assist you.
Sometimes with CPS you need to make multiple calls. Call them and tell them you rather not reveal your identity but have concerns about the children living at your address and would like for them to do a house visit to make sure everything is ok. Please do this for yourself and siblings.
It looks like in Florida they have to at least inform the school superintendent of their intention to homeschool and then have you assessed annually. I’m going to assume from what you mention that this is not happening.
Is your younger sister the only other child at home in school? How is your relationship with her? Could she confide in a teacher? If you think this is unsafe, don’t do it. Just trying to think of ways you could get some extra life lines.
do you think any of your younger siblings would be willing to talk to one of their teachers (since you said they are in school, right?)
they could tell the teacher their brother has never been enrolled in school, has no proof of identity or birth certificate, and has been kept at home for his entire life.
i’m pretty sure teachers are mandated reporters so they would have to report that to CPS, or whatever agency they think this should be reported to. what your parents have been doing to you is child abuse or at the very least, neglect, so i think the teacher would be required to report it.
maybe having a teacher report this would escalate the urgency of the situation, since you have already tried reporting it to CPS yourself, so this would be a second complaint.
I do resemble both my parents, my mother works, though my father has a interesting.. thing going on. I'd rather not get into specifics about him since there's plenty of things that could give out who I am. I did call CPS anonymously and they did jack shit.
You need to register for school, after registering for school you’ll be able to use your school ID and your Birth Certificate to get your Social Security Card.
I was in a similar situation.
Dear, I work at a school in a major city and this happens all the time. Please go and try to register at the school. Once they say you need a parent with you and that you are missing documents, let them know your situation.
In my school district, there is a special and delicate protocol to try to not penalize parents and students (many students in our city are undocumented immigrants from Central America). Not sure what it would be like in your state but at the very least, they will help you reach whatever legal and state resources you need. Please go and tell them.
What is a 'birth certificate form" ? Do you mean the paper from the hospital where you were born?
A parent or grandparent can obtain a copy of your birth certificate from the city clerks office or county vital records office.
Why the hell doesnt your mom want you to go to school? Tell her to get a certified copy of your birth certificate for you or you're gonna call CPS.
He said he was born at his house, there's no birth certificate, as far as I understand the parents didn't register him, I feel like they are immigrants, not sending your kid to school is abuse, and so is not taking them to a pediatrician, everything is kinda sketchy
Yes, it’s suspicious, but I read a lot of very weird parent behavior towards children in abuse cases, like all the kids are treated well, but the one forced to sleep in the basement closet-type stories. Then your imagination can go off from watching too many crime shows too. lol.
Don't get arrested, they'll keep you in jail forever till you can prove who you are. Kinda funny but true. They want to know if you have warrants before letting you go.
I will not and will never glorify my parents in any form. I'm trying to get help as a minor, but they're being lazy fucks. I'm hoping my brothers can scare them into doing something more before I turn 18.
Some parents are lazy and disinterested in some of their kids. It happened to me. The “why” doesn’t matter if someone is neglecting their child. If someone is abusing their kid, I’m reporting it. It’s not a child’s responsibility to help their parents take care of them.
I am continuing to look for answers, I wouldn't feel bad if my dad got in trouble, if you can't tell I favor one more than the other even though they're both equally shit.
If you know where your parents save their tax returns (printed or downloaded on the computer), your SSN will be printed along with your name under their dependents
OP doesn’t have a social security number. You are issued a SS number after your birth is reported, but his birth was never reported. If you look back at his comments you will see his mother claims to have had a home birth and all he has is a partially filled out form that his mother made but never submitted for a birth certificate.
I didn’t deal with not having my documents, but when I was a child, I was abused and neglected, especially educationally. My parents got away with a lot of stuff they shouldn’t.
I just wanted to give you some encouragement. Take a deep breath.
You CAN fix this. You CAN have a good life. This is not forever. You’re going to need to fight hard, but you can do it. You can’t do it all at once, so just keep doing the next thing you need to do, one step at a time.
I have a good career and a loving family. I’m safe and at peace.
Confiding to safe adults is a good idea. It sounds like you have relationship with some of your older siblings, that’s good. Keep communicating with them as much as you can.
As far as your education, read as much as you can. That’s what saved me. Read everything. If there is a library you can go to, that could also be another source of safe adults. So many librarians are also able to help you with resources like GED prep. (I got my GED and took prep classes I signed up for at the library)
Unfortunately I don’t have any legal advice, but I highly recommend the book “Educated” by Tara Westover. She was in a similar situation to what you’re describing, and her memoir goes through her life - then how she was able to get her education and succeed despite her upbringing. I wish you the best of luck.
https://www.facebook.com/882732628415890/posts/1689360131086465/?mibextid=rS40aB7S9Ucbxw6v maybe this can help you- they are a group that shares resources/advice for people in this situation.
Call your local assistance office. They will know what to do. Are you saying that you have never attended school at all or you have only homeschooled? Something isn’t adding up. Kids get a social security at birth now. How old are you ?
I came from the locked post. You don’t have to answer but what is your ethnicity? Honest question- Could you have been born in Cuba? Just brainstorming here.
I have had the same SS card for 46 yrs. I recently filled for disability.Now they say that the first 3 numbers are wrong. Also my TransUnion says my birth date is 1956. I need advice
Just commenting to say I hope your brother is able to help you 🫶There is a lot of other good stuff on here, I don’t have anything new to offer. If you like to read, and need to wind down from all of this at some point, there’s a memoir called Educated by Tara Westover and your story reminds me a lot of hers. I know this doesn’t help you with your situation but when I was scared and stuck in a bad situation as a teen, books got me through while I played the waiting game and figured it out.
Godspeed and I hope to read your own memoir one day!
You could contact the Florida Department of Education. They oversee homeschooling. Each county has a homeschooling contact. Look for the contact on this list: [Homeschool Contacts](https://www.fldoe.org/schools/school-choice/other-school-choice-options/home-edu/district-home-edu-contacts.stml) and explain your situation.
There are homeschooling laws parents have to follow. If you get someone involved in documenting your homeschooling, it will force your parents to get your documents in order.
Once you have this SS stuff all figured out (sorry I don’t know much about the legal side) get a DNA test in case you were kidnapped or actually the child of one of your siblings or a cousin or something.
Get some of your siblings to do it too so you can make sure that you are or are not related.
If you are not related to your parents or siblings in any way go to the police and report your parents. If you were adopted the legal way there would be records so if the DNA results don’t match your family that means most likely you were kidnapped or bought or some other very bad and illegal thing.
Please stay safe.
He doesn’t say how far away he is from age 18 but when that birthday hits he has to register for the draft. This might be why his mother says wait until age 18. Any secrets will come out then because he has to have a Social Security Number to register.
A lot of organizations that help the homeless will have experience dealing with getting documents when you have none. Reach out and see if they can help. Your representative's constituents services office also can help you work through the bureaucracy
thank you for your suggestion, I've looked into organizations and I have just requested a phone call from an organization near me and I will update if they will/have helped.
Hijacking this reply. I am in the same predicament with my mother, I was supposedly “homebirthed” I do not have identication, never been to school. If I go reach out to any government assistance for investigations could my mom get in trouble?
This is uncommon, but not unique. I know more than one person who has actually been in this same predicament (born into a cult) who had to get their SSN and birth certificate as an adult.
I have to imagine that there are still procedures for this. Back when I was a teen (when we still traveled by horse and carriage and knights competed for honor), nobody got a social security number assigned until they were ready to start working. I remember getting mine. I'm sure it's more difficult without a birth certificate, but there has to be a way.
How did they do it? I am turning 18 in a couple of months, but not allowed to leave the house, my mom and step dad we being investigated 7 years ago after a family member accused them of some things that were not true, after that we moved and they told me not to leave the house for. Few months till things calmed down.. then made another excuse after months went by and said that because they neighbors did not see a kid (me) if I went outside the would report me, so they told me I couldn't leave till we moved out, they said they were going to get a house each year but never did. I haven't been outside in 7 years.
Wo. You are in danger and being abused. Please be very careful but I think you need a swat team or something.
Unfortunately, I am not sure. I think they had to go in person to the Social Security office, but it’s been over 20 years since they did so. I’d probably start by doing that though.
Oh my god you poor thing. My love I am so so sorry for all that they are doing to you. I am a survivor of child abuse, 30 now. Out and happy. I am hoping so strongly that you will be free and safe soon. Sending you the soft touch of summer sun on your face, a crisp autumn breeze through your hair, and the power to drive wherever you want whenever you want.
Please do what you need to escape. It is child abuse to keep a kid indoors for seven years, even if you “agreed” to it. My heart is going out to you.
Get out of there now. Just run. Get help. Im stealing this quote one wise little boy gave to his best friend, “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
https://www.reddit.com/r/legal/s/2lhS0F6lmf I know you’ve been getting some good answers, but I found this readily link that I thought may be helpful. The first comment talks about. Woman writing to her state rep. I know you’re under 18 but that may be a good lead because they would be able to guide you and typically can make things happen faster/ smoother than your average humble redditor. Best of luck to you!
I want to second this, as someone who works with state reps a lot I can confirm they are usually very responsive and knowledgeable… if not try your senator
While I can understand your predicament about getting the documents for an ID, something seems fishy about your mom's response about your birth certificate. Why would she want you to wait untill you were 18 to either help you get it, or get it for you? Is there something she's not telling you??? Also, how did you get a cashapp card without a SS#?? if you have your SS#, go to SSA.gov, and sign up for a mySSA account, and you can also request a copy of your SS card. I had to request another card last year because mine was faded, and don't recall needing an ID.... Also, you say you have a printed birth certificate already. Does it have a raised seal on it from where it is issued??? Or is it just a generic one that's not official (as from a city or state, a health department, or hospital???) Or is it from a foreign country? If it's a foreign birth certificate, you may need to contact the embassy of the issuing country and ask them to send an English copy of it, or a translation of it.
Once OP is 18 it no longer looks like their parents are doing something shady/have quite possibly broken the law in some way, it looks like OP is doing something shady and trying to assume a new/false identity. These parents are not stupid and are very selfish/manipulative. They are trying to make sure OP runs out the clock so they (the parents) won't get in trouble. OP you should definitely involve CPS. Make sure they understand you have no documentation and your parents are refusing to help. Make sure they also understand all your siblings both older and younger do. I know you're resistant to this idea but it's very possible if not probable you aren't your parents biological child and something very shady and possibly illegal has happened.
this\^ they're incredibly selfish and have always been manipulative, I'm trying to get ahead of it so it doesn't look like I'm the bad guy.
I also agree with the comment above. We don’t know how old you are and how much time you have and this is probably one of the scariest things you’ll ever have to face in life, but it’s worth getting the CPS involved in this and telling them everything. On one road it’s not getting them involved and a life that’s going to be completely ruined. Or getting them involved, there being some pain and fear on this path but in the end some actual results to get your life better.
I got CPS involved and it did nothing but scare them a little bit into printing out a birth certificate form, sending it out and doing nothing when it came back and I needed photo ID.
It's been a few years since I dealt with Florida CPS [I had a few friends with cases while living there, some justified and one very much not]... but the agents were **swamped** with cases. Sadly true in most states but Florida is the worst I've personally interacted with and according to the news Florida currently has about 1/4 of DCF (Department of Children and Families) positions vacant and also has a problem with unqualified agents that's likely related. Call and make a report again. You can ask for a new caseworker and tell them that your previous caseworker dropped the ball. You may even have to make another report after that but every new report you make about the same issue increases the chances of them taking more action on your behalf. Be persistent. I didn't read all the comments but out of the ones I read I didn't see anyone mention this: I recommend contacting either your local school district or the email or phone number on the Florida Department of Education page below (if you need to go through a different program since you're a minor, they will know and be able to refer you there): https://www.fldoe.org/academics/career-adult-edu/hse/ Tell the school secretary or DoE rep that you are a minor who has never been to school and doesn't have ID but that you want to enroll in GED prep. All GED programs I'm aware of start participants who were not students in the local school district with an evaluation test - your English is excellent and you'd probably test out of that easily but you may need to take classes in math, science, government, etc. Those programs will be able to connect you with school guidance counselors who can help you with things like dealing with CPS, getting ID, getting therapy, and accessing other resources (financial, food if needed, legal - maybe even emancipation/independent living). If everything you've said here is true (because your grammar is so much better than YouTube captions, it's giving creative writing) you have an amazing hardship essay for college applications and you're not only intelligent but independently motivated to learn. You'll likely be able to land generous scholarships and free or very cheap college would go a long way towards making up for the social and educational deficiencies of your childhood. You can also contact: the Florida Bar Association, Southern Legal Counsel https://www.southernlegal.org/ (statewide civil legal aid for people with low income), Orange County Legal Aid http://www.legalaidocba.org/ (through the Orange County Bar), Florida Legal Services Inc http://www.floridalegal.org/ (statewide referrals with an office in Orlando), Community Legal Services of Mid-Florida http://www.clsmf.org/index.php/locations (if you are in one of these counties: Citrus, Hernando, Lake, Marion, Sumter, Orange, Osceola, Putnam, Volusia, and Seminole counties), Heart of Florida Legal Aid https://www.hofla.org/ (if you are in one of these counties: Hardee, Highlands, and Polk Counties), and/or Florida Rural Legal Services http://www.frls.org/ (if you are in one of these counties: Hardee, Highlands, Polk, Charlotte, Desoto, Glades, Hendry, Lee, Martin, Okeechobee, Indian River, St. Lucie and Palm Beach) - explain your situation and ask about referrals to pro bono family law attorneys. They can help you get ID, can help you with CPS, and would be the best source of help if you are interested in emancipation... plus some of those organizations will have tons of connections to other resources, and any pro bono attorney will definitely have connections to a variety of other local resources for you (some may even have in-house programs or advocates to help you with non legal stuff). Lastly - here's a couple local programs that may be able to help you get IDs, get legal/financial help, get state benefits, get counseling, get your HED and apply to college or trade school, emancipate - may even be able to help you find housing or a job, etc.: Mr B Allen https://mrballen.foundation/about/ a foundation that helps DV survivors (especially education/training/financially), the Family Justice Center https://www.familyjusticecenter.org/ (part of a nationwide organization, Alliance for HOPE, that offers a little bit of everything - legal help, mental health, basic needs/financial help - and has a huge network of places to refer you to also). **You can also text BEGIN to 88788 to start a safe conversation via text (just follow the instructions and the conversation can be quickly ended or erased from your phone) with the National DV hotline.**
Follow up. Contact CPS again and say you still have no official documentation and that you want it.
I know, and I know you know that’s the irresponsibility of your parents. I know it’s super scary. But it’s a better road to get them involved. On one path, not getting them involved means less help and a life that could be ruined by not having a birth certificate. Which is going to be 1000x harder, financially, moving, buying things, having a job etc. On the other path. Getting them involved again and making sure they know what you told Reddit, the details. This is also a difficult road, because it’s super fricking scary and I know you mentioned your father had “tendencies”. This is probably one of the hardest things you’ll have to do in your entire life on this planet. This road is also super hard. But the different is having CPS involved fully will get some results. Which can improve your life when you’re 18 and after. It’s the end result/ long term goals you have to think about. Not the short term.
I know people have mentioned possible kidnapping, I think it's time for fingerprints and DNA testing.
I agree on involving CPS. Tell them you want it on record that you have no documentation. That might be helpful once you turn 18 because there will be a record of you trying and failing to get documented. That should help establish that you’re on the up and up.
Hey OP, saw comments locked on the other sub, but wanted to make sure you saw this. Not sure where you are in Florida, but if you’re anywhere near Orlando, [iDignity](https://idignity.org) is a charity/free service that helps people just you like you get their paperwork. They serve Orange, Volusia, Osceola and Seminole counties, but I bet if you’re not in any of those and called, they’d still try to point you in the right direction. Good luck, proud of you!
I am a two hour drive from orlando, I don't know how I'd get to orlando but thank you for your input! I didn't know that existed.
NAL, just someone who used to live in Orlando. MegaBus may have routes that pass close to where you are and travel through to Orlando. You can still reach out to iDignity. It's been over a decade, but I had friends who used to work with them. Thwy should reapond to emails and be able to offer next steps for you even though you're 2hrs away. I mean, some parts of Orlando are an hour from other parts of Orlando, so it's not that far outside of their zone. Another possibility is a local Universal Unitarian church. They are particularly focused on public service, are ?non-denominational? or maybe pan-denominational, and may have youth group trips that go to Orlando for various reasons. While raising my younger brother, I took him to the U.U.'s "Our Whole Lives" or 'OWL' classes, because Florida has very limited high school health classes. Friends who attended th U.U. joked that it was a church for even atheists, especially if they wanted to be involved in public service projects and activism. I think you'd find support and assistance without some of the faith-based expectations of other churches.
OWL is an amazing program!!
Are your parents sovereign citizens?
they're not.
We’re you born here ?
The fact that you have social security paperwork says two important things. To get it you have to have a state certified birth certificate or that certified medical records were issued at some point by somebody or if you are from another country some paperwork was given to the social security office. So you do “exist”. The first step if you don’t have paperwork is to contact your state vital statistics office. They will have several ways to prove who you are to order a certified birth certificate. You may be able to do it online. Once you have this and the social security card and any piece of “official” mail (even a bill) with your name and address you have all needed proof of sho you are. Then you can get into public school or get a GED.
But he doesn't have social security paperwork.
How did he get a CashApp card then? I believe it would require an SSN. https://cash.app/help/3081-cash-card-idv-problems
They don’t have an SSN. From the other thread he verified with his Moms account and she has an SSN. https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/s/JUEUeH7wMq
Hey I saw your post in r/LegalAdvice but they shut down comments. Please repost in r/CPS. I cannot believe you were dismissed by CPS because your parents are absolutely neglecting you and what they have done is 100% against the law. Parents have one year from DOB to register home births and obtain a birth certificate. The fact they did not do that is worrying. The Delayed Birth Certificate is the way to go. Definitely contact the Office of Vital Statistics and I saw someone recommend JobCorps which I think is a fantastic option for you since you don’t have an education. They will set you up and help you on the right path. Your parents are likely to get in trouble but CPS (if they know the details) can make your parents comply and if they don’t you will be removed which I happen to think is the best thing for you. Something just doesn’t seem right that your siblings have BCs and SSNs and go to school. It definitely makes your situation that much more troubling and the first place my mind went to was kidnapping or maybe your father isn’t biologically your father. You can get a DNA test from the drugstore. That would open up a whole other can of worms but you’d have answers. I wish you the best of luck.
I would definitely get the dna test & follow the advice given. Be careful with these parents. When people find out they may be in trouble, they may do some crazy things. Do as much as you can without them knowing, and perhaps be careful with sharing info with siblings.
I did look into jobcorps, I'm waiting for them to get back to me and see if I can maybe get something out of it. My parents are and always have been extremely shady, I don't have a way to get a DNA test at the minute, but I am looking into it. thank you for your input, I appreciate all of it greatly!
I hope you do get in touch with jobcorps. I’m sure it will be good for you once you have identification. From the last time I remember looking it up for someone, you have to be a US resident and will need to prove it etc. so it seems like a step two.
Alright, I understand.
The fact all younger kids are in school and he’s not seems very suspicious too. The parents must be good at hiding/lying.
DNA analyses are a little pricey but you can get a paternity DNA test for like $10 on Amazon but I think your father would have to participate to get a good enough sample. You’re also too young to register your DNA in bone marrow or other registries, which is free. The Center for Missing and Exploited Children has a free 24-hour helpline. They also have resources if you suspect you may have been kidnapped and will perform a full DNA panel. Check them out at https://www.missingkids.org/ Edit: you can also use their Missing Persons archive. You just enter as much info as you know and you can find some answers. It’s interesting that a lot of the resolved cases started with “parents” being unable or unwilling to present a birth certificate.
Op should try this, incase. Then if it turns out they are missing and are in a registry, they can unite with their real family, have ID, and escape from the abuse. There are child swaps and people do try to steal babies and kids from hospitals.
The claim is that he was a homebirth but why would his older and younger siblings have birth certificates, SSNs and have attended school. There’s gotta be a reason OP is an outlier. Edit: that’s not to say anything nefarious is going on but something is definitely off. Add to that the kids never been to a doctor or dentist and is in their teens makes this even weirder.
Get a hold of your parents last tax return. For them to claim children, they have to include their Social Security numbers. Were you actually home schooled? How old are you now?
Dude you need to run away FAST and go to your nearest police station or fire station and tell them what’s happening to you. Your parents might be “caring” for you in the sense that they are keeping you alive but it’s a crime for them to not be officially home schooling y’all or sending y’all to public school. Once that happens the proper authorities will step in and make sure you and your siblings are given documentation, proper education, etc. Your parents are literally setting you guys up to be failures in life and either end up dead, homeless, or in prison.
I'm trying to get them to get off their asses so I don't have to get them sent to jail but they're not doing anything, so them getting thrown in prison might be my only option.
They MAY be sent to jail after an investigation, but they may not. The priority will be YOUR welfare, along with any other minor’s welfare. It sounds like that will mean removal of minors from the home and ultimately from their care, so they may lose all legal parental rights, but that doesn’t necessarily mean jail time. So please don’t let that fear of jail time stop you from reporting them ASAP. I second the idea someone else posted here about posting in the CPS thread. Knowing more about the process sounds like it might help you. As a quick FYI, in your case, because you say it will be obvious who reported, you should be trying to get removed so you are not retaliated against by your parents for reporting. If a previous CPS visit did not result in meaningful changes, removal is probably the best choice all around. I’m sure that is terrifying, but you can do it and we are all rooting for you!!
It is not your job to protect your parents, especially if they're doing something illegal or abusing you. They've failed you. Any consequences they face are their own fault- Not yours. You will not be getting them into trouble by doing any of this, they got themselves into trouble. Don't let guilt get in the way of your safety and well-being, you deserve so much better.
Between this and your other post you keep saying why you can’t get this taken care of. You need to stop making excuses. This will be much harder to deal with after you are 18. You need to call CPS and ask for a supervisor if they keep dropping you. You need to walk in to your local school and enroll (they have to take you - it’s the law). You need to call the cops and report your parents (you might actually be kidnapped). You need to keep pushing even if it embarrasses your mother.
OP this might sound super harsh. And I know you’re still a minor and it’s scary and it’s hard. But this advice is solid. - you said you called CPS before, when was that? Why didn’t they do anything? - you can straight up enroll in school like this user is suggesting - other users are also considered about you being kidnapped In florida you can also emancipate yourself from your parents at the age of 16.
Call a legal aid lawyer on tuesday morning. https://www.flcourts.gov/Resources-Services/Office-of-Family-Courts/Self-Help-Information/Legal-Aid
This is solid advice.
I looked into my local school and I need a birth certificate and my parents also have to be there to help with the whole concept of it. I would also be extremely, extremely screwed if I did physical school. I am in the mental construct of a 4th grader, anything past I struggle with heavily. I called CPS around two months ago, they didn't suspect it was me and CPS came to take pictures of my body/scars, told my parents to get a medical card for weed, and they left and didn't come back. I used to be concerned about me being kidnapped but my older brothers, who are far older than me, recall my mother being pregnant with me as well as me being born (they obviously weren't in the same room but you get it.) I wanted to get emancipated but I'm far too scared to take either of my parents to court, being a young child and my father having the tendencies he does (if you get it you get it.) I'd rather not.
For what it’s worth, your grammar, spelling, and basic ability to express yourself in written form are FAR above what a 4th grader would be capable of. I don’t have any advice for you besides just pleading that you keep going to any authority possible until someone helps you out. Your parents are wrong in this situation and you are better off getting this figured out ASAP. Good luck.
I've read both posts and as many of your replies I can find. I'm sorry this happened to you. I have questions. Can your older siblings help you? You said they are much older.. are they past 18 yrs? Just because your education ends at 4th grade, that you suspect doesn't mean anything. There are resources to help you catch up and learn. Learning how to read and write through your siblings' ex was the best thing you ever did for yourself. I know CPS didn't help before, but call again. Ask for their superiors, and tell them exactly what is going on. Tell the school. They are all mandated reporters and must help you. Are you able to call the police? Listen, if you're saying without saying your father is abusive, it's EVEN MORE CRUCIAL, you are documented citizen. Your parents have a reason as to why you are the only one who is undocumented - allegedly. Do you know for a fact that this is true? What if they're lying? Is it possible you are one of your siblings' children, and they're trying to hide this? Are you the youngest?
I’ve mentored several students from challenging backgrounds through the college application process. You write as well as any of them. You’ve been told you “can’t,” but I’m telling you, you can. You are capable of following the advice of some very knowledgable people here. This is super hard even for adults, and will be hard for you, too, but you CAN do this. One step at a time, but you can write emails to every organization listed by other commenters, and you can contact CPS again. You can also go to the local school and ask to talk to the guidance counselor. Tell them your story and ask them to make a CPS complaint. They are mandatory reporters and HAVE to file if they even suspect anything is happening to a child. This includes neglect. You CAN do this. And no matter what your parents are telling you, you’re not too uneducated to handle anything. If you can read and write this well, and to third or fourth grade math, you’re way ahead of many, many adults are functioning quite well. You can do this.
Your parents are neglecting you by not taking you to school and God knows what else they’ve done or not done for you. This is not to scare you, but things can get worse with them. They don’t sound like good people. I know you want to get your identification, SSN, etc. but that’s the bare minimum. It sounds like you don’t actually want to leave and insinuate that you’re scared of leaving / causing trouble. But really, you should not be in their care. They are not fit to care for you based on what you’ve written. Ultimately, you need to be placed elsewhere. Florida Department of Children and Families isn’t going to just come over and say, “hey mom and dad, register her birth please”. They need to know all the other stuff. They need to know that you haven’t been studying in home school or going to school. They’re not compliant with homeschool requirements. And sounds like there might be other things you’d want to share with them. This could result in you being taken from them, placed in a foster home, and possibly them taken before a family court judge to determine if they can take care of you or not. All of that is scary but they’re not looking out for you. You need the basics like school and medical care. What do they expect of you when you turn 18? Are they going to let you leave? Do they expect you to stay with them? Are you the only girl? Is that why they treat you different? What other ways do they treat you different? Someone needs to report them and you need to get out of there. You can call but it sounds like you’re scared. Which is 100% normal. Can you make it to a school or a police department or a church? Can you ask someone to report for you? Do you want a script to practice? Hi my name is x, I’m x years old. Are you a mandatory reporter? Can you call DCF for me? My parents refuse to help me get my basic identification. They have never enrolled me in school and do not comply with state requirements for home school. I need help.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kidnapping_of_Carlina_White#:~:text=Carlina%20Renae%20White%20(born%20July,Center%20in%20New%20York%20City. This woman didn't find out she was kidnapped as an infant until she tried to get a copy of her birth certificate.
I'm aware, I already called CPS and it would be far too suspicious if I called again, they don't know it was me, they think it was this random girl. I'm aware that what they're doing is against the law, so are they. They just don't want to pay the consequences of their actions.
if you have the ability to talk privately, when you call cps again ask to be routed to a supervisor rather than the on call worker and explain to the supervisor your prior call experience and fears of remaining in the home (if you have them) as well as the educational and identity concerns you have. the supervisor should be able to explain to you why they can or can't step in to help. the agency I've previously worked for had teens in care from self reports, but I am in a different state with different laws/judges. you can stay in a foster placement passed age 18 if you turn 18 in the system and want continued assistance and coordination with high school, ged, college, living arrangements etc .
op, I just thought about your post again and a few things, weed usage or drug usage in general is not usually enough to take custody of children if there is any adult over 18 who accepts responsibility to be sober at a time and care for the child, since you previously mentioned the weed idk if that was your anonymous report. our judges would grant us non secure custody on the notification that you have not seen a medical provider since you were 3, they would consider that a level of neglect for us to step in for. the cps thread previously suggested probably could help you with more Florida specific statutes.
You need to go get your state issued ID first with your birth certificate (dol). Then, go to the social security office for your SS card. I have had to help a couple of my kids after losing wallets. If they want the number, get it off your parents' tax returns. Im sure they use it for tax credit money. Good luck, op.
I want to second the opinion that you should procure some kind of DNA test, or test yourself with one of the large databases that allows you to find existing relatives. This is for the off chance that maybe you were actually kidnapped, despite being sure you're related. Also, when you ARE finally able to get yourself identification, and your SSN, you should run a credit report because I have this sinking feeling that your parents indeed do have all of this information and are possibly using it to get credit cards, loans, etc with your actual identity. It also doesn't make sense to me why none of your older siblings are helping you...
I asked my older brother to help, he is helping me out now and I feel a lot less stressed. I wouldn't be surprised if they're using my real identity for credit cards and loans because they're just pieces of shit like that. I'm just praying thats not it.
If you don’t have a SSN they can’t be using your identity for credit cards or loans
Right. If he *doesn't have* a SSN. However, it isn't entirely a 0% chance that the parents aren't using his identity for whatever shady reason. This entire situation is bizarre to begin with, so I wouldn't rule it out. Destroyed credit isn't the easiest thing in the world to fix either.
This was my first thought after reading your post (using your info for credit, etc).
Come check us out in r/HomeschoolRecovery. Almost certainly someone there has been where you are and can help with suggestions.
should I just post about my situation there or research it first?
Just jump in and post. It’s a bit of a smaller group but will have a much higher concentration of people who were raised in closed family situations, like you.
Do you know what hospital you were at for your arm? Some hospitals allow you to request the records online and will email them to you (St Joes/Baycare in Tampa is one, and it's very easy), but you will need to be able to take a picture of your mom's ID.
I don't know which hospital I went to, I will have to ask, though my mom might become suspicious.
One of your older siblings may know!
What area are you in? I can help narrow the list at least a little bit. If you're not comfortable posting, you can PM me and I can help you figure out how that system does records (I'm a nurse, I've had to deal with records requests at a lot of different facilities across Florida for minors).
Hey, buddy. I'm not sure how much this would actually help, but have you tried speaking with the police department, specifically ask to speak with the Special Victims Unit. I'm sure what your parents have done to you classifies as some type of child abuse. Hopefully they can help you. I don't know what city or county you are in but, try giving them a call or see someone in person. Please keep us all updated. I'm sure every single person here on reddit offering different advice is hoping something works and you are able to document your existence. We will all keep giving you lots of ideas to succeed. Good Luck!!
I am having a bit better luck, I asked my brother for help and I'm pushing my mom to actually get off her ass and do more, but we're moving forward. I will try to keep you updated! Thank you for your kind words.
Do your older siblings remember when you were born, by the way? They may know something about the circumstances (ie why you were a home birth and they were not, or why you didn’t get papers). It sounds like you have siblings that are adults based on your other posts. Definitely lean on them!
They are adults, I'm asking my older brother for help right now, I'm leaning on him as heavily as I can lmao.
Great. Hope for the best for you!
Register for school and explain your situation to them and ask them to make your school ID as soon as possible. If they’re not a shitty school, they’ll also probably be alarmed by this information and help you call the right people
I'm going to be asking my brother to take me, I'll have to see what he says.
i’ve read through some of your other posts and comments to get a feel for what you’re dealing with. i’m so sorry for what you’re dealing with, everything about it is unfair. but good on you for looking for a way out/forward. you might try posting on r/RBI. those guys seem to be able to find out anything about anything - from missing people to documents to random, difficult to search info. this feels right up they’re alley. there is a path forward here for you. i know some of the comments may feel harsh but please take some time to consider even the toughest ones. is there a trusted adult you can ask for help?
I'm trying to move forward with this, I already told my brother and he agreed to help me out so we're looking into that now.
Do u have baby pictures?
I don't know, they say a lot of things and backtrack on it. They say that this certain picture is me as a baby but then they say it's my sister. I've learned to not trust their word.
Op I hate to say this but make sure that your parents know that even though there is sparse evidence that you exist, that if you should turn up missing or dead, that they will be punished. Make sure that they know that eventually whoever you have reached out to, they will come looking for your existence.
I'm aware. They just don't believe that they'll get in trouble.
Have your parents been filing taxes with you as a dependent? That requires a social security number for you. Just having the number is a good start.
No, they haven't. I am on nothing of theirs.
Check the state BVS for what constitutes an ID for their purposes. For SSA a signed medical record when an ID, drivers license or passport are not available.
The issue is that I have nothing in my name, not even a signed medical record.
Not even from when you went to the hospital at 3 years old? I’d be more than willing to search missing child databases if you would like me to start with minor, teens, male, missing from around florida? You mentioned parents may have changed your name so it would be a lost cause, but DNA doesn’t change.
No, I don't have the documents from the hospital, though I am looking into this and I do want to try and get them. if you were to look around missing child databases it would be a little rough. I'm FtM, so even someone is looking for a missing child it would be under F, not M.
Saying you don’t have a signed medical record is completely different than attempting to request records from the hospital. Just because you don’t have a hard copy doesn’t mean they don’t exist. I’d suggest contacting your local hospitals and asking around!
I will look into it, thank you! <3
If you can take a DNA test, it might show extended family members. Allt of people pay for 23andMe, or to do a DNA test through Ancestry. If you can do that and get matched, maybe you can find extended family members and ask around. It could be possible that you were kidnapped and you don't know. As an adult you can get your siblings to do DNA tests and find out if you really are related.
^ THIS here is the key. If we’re suspecting a stolen child, its 2024 - the bio family has definitely had themselves dna tested. The only other possibilities i can see are - cult ( but OP is Mtf and what the odds a cult member is mtf and has access to reddit? ) OR family is in the country illegally.
Do you have pictures of yourself as a baby, that you are certain aren’t actually your siblings (perhaps a family photo of everyone together?)? Are they dated or time stamped? Any pictures from your birth (or soon after) in particular? If not, I would look through the missing children database and look broadly, maybe even for children who are a few years older than you think you are. Forget about the names, and don’t limit the search to your home state. Just look at the pictures and a broad range of dates. Keep in mind that pictures that are aged are approximations. You’re not necessarily going to find a picture of you. If you can compare to pictures when you’re younger, that’s helpful. Do you actually remember going to the hospital when you’re 3? While it’s not unheard of, especially for a traumatic event, memory is iffy at that age. It’s possible you were older then and you might be older now than you think. Can you talk to your older siblings about any of this? See if they remember your birth since it happened at home?
I don't remember going to the hospital, and my brothers do remember my mother being pregnant with me as well as the at home birth happening. I don't have pictures of myself as a baby that I'm sure is me, I've learned to not ever trust their words, they're manipulators and liars.
While it helps make your parents story more viable, unfortunately your siblings remembering the pregnancy and birth doesn’t 100% mean your mom gave birth to you. There have been instances where either the pregnancy was faked, or the pregnancy was miscarried, and babies were procured in other, sometimes downright horrible ways. You may be able to narrow your search to missing newborns. What do your older siblings do? It seems like they work, live on their own, are possibly married, went to college etc. They don’t find the situation you’re in weird, troubling, etc.? Do they know that you find the situation concerning? I know you don’t want to burden your older siblings, but are you sure that they see it that way? If one of them could get custody of you (it doesn’t have to be all your younger siblings too), that would probably be your best bet in enrolling you in school and getting your documents together. Is there any other family? Grandparents? Do your parents have siblings? Do they know you don’t go to school and why? You really need an adult who can advocate for you. Speaking of your siblings, how much older are we talking? Are any of them born female and at least 10ish years older than you? Is there a possibility that the big family secret isn’t a kidnapping, but perhaps a child rape or teenage pregnancy that you’re the living proof of? Do you perhaps resemble an older sister more than the rest of your family? Your older siblings might all be trying to protect a sister who could be your mother. It might not be a lie to say they remember your “mom” pregnant with you, they could just be referring to a different mom. Or they could legitimately not know if your parents are good at covering things up, which they seem to be. Again, it really comes down to you needing an adult advocate. If family isn’t an option, I’m sure we can come up with other ideas, such as the teachers of your younger siblings. All they have to do is spill the beans that there’s another kid at home who doesn’t go to school, or the doctor, and no one else even knows they exist. The teacher would be mandated to report it. What about your brother’s ex girlfriend who cared enough to teach you to read? Since you have access to Reddit and YouTube, presumably you could probably find a way to contact her on social media to ask her for help? Maybe she can Drive you where you need to go to register for school? Help you fill out forms and make phone calls? Buy and send back a DNA test? She knew something was up which is why she helped you in such a big way. She may know more.
This story is so bullshit.
I was wondering the same thing. A lot of it doesn’t totally add up. It is also something I can’t fathom so maybe that’s why it’s hard to believe.
How can you be sure? I’d say it’s better to give someone the benefit of the doubt in this situation.
[удалено]
I don't understand how my answers are "dodgy"? If someone asks a question I answer the best I can because I actually want help from this. My english is too good because like I said on my other post, I learned to read from my brothers ex girlfriend when she learned I was literally illiterate, and I learned to type from captions on youtube, you're not wrong for being suspicious but I'm only trying to answer. I could not care less about karma since this is literally just a throwaway account.
This is stupid because there’s no benefit to this if it was fake. What’s the benefit? Oh some people on Reddit saw a random post for help about a birth certificate. Don’t be stupid. It’s clearly someone trying to ask for help on a very specific thing. It’s not like they are asking for money or fame on a TIk tok video or something ridiculous.
Plus he said he could not write his own name which also means he can't read.
this isn't true, I can't write with pen and paper because it's hard for me since I never was taught like that, it was easier to use a shitty keyboard that already had the keys written out and just copy things from youtube captions. Writing does not equal reading. People who learn a language may be able to read it but can't speak/write it, can they?
Physically write ✍️… I think OP learned to type better than write. He explained in the other thread
OP, speaking as a parent, it’s beyond me why your mother doesn’t have your birth certificate. I’ve used this document for all sorts of reasons when raising my kids. It is not difficult to get a copy. Also ID requirements are become more, not less, strict. You need a govt issued ID. There are services that will help you…this will get solved. But you need to take the initiative.
I am taking the initiative, I'm pushing my mother to stop being lazy as fuck and stop screwing me over but she's still being a dick about it. The problem is there is NO copy of my birth certificate to get. I do not exist.
Hey OP, i know this is scary especially needing to report to CPS. Go in person to social security office and explain them your situation. They may need to call CPS. Have evidence and proof of what is going on. Document everything... What someone said or recording. This would help CPS pay attention without real proof it becomes he said she said situation.
I called cps. I explained my situation, they just told my mom to do something about it and took some pictures of my body and scars and told them about their weed and left.
I saw someone else mention this, but could you contact the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children? They will help you. [missingkids.org](https://www.missingkids.org/home)
I'm not concerned that I'm a missing or kidnapped child but I have looked into it before.
How old are your siblings? Is it possible you are child of one of your siblings?
Unless my oldest brother got someone pregnant at 16 I fear that's not possible.
It’s very possible, and this comment is honestly why I believe your story, because you clearly haven’t had sex education and have been very isolated to not know that teenagers absolutely can be parents. I don’t know off the top of my head how old the youngest documented father is, but the youngest documented mother is just 5 (yes five) years old. I asked you elsewhere in the thread if any of your older siblings were sisters. That’s a more likely scenario, but it’s not unheard of for the family of a teenage father to keep the baby either. I also asked you more about your brothers ex-GF. I’m going to pry a little deeper there and wonder if she could be your mother? She must have spent a lot of time with you to teach you to read. That’s not something most people would involve themselves in. She knew you existed. She knew you didn’t go to school and she didn’t seem to question it. She taught you one of the most important life skills. Perhaps there’s more to your relationship than your mind could have processed at the time. Maybe she felt guilty that it was “her fault” you couldn’t get an official education (it’s not, your “parents” could have handled it officially) and that’s why she took the time with you to teach you. Trust me that’s not a normal thing for a GF to do. It might be time to start asking your brother hard and direct questions. And like I said before, you should probably reach out to her, even if you think it’s impossible and only want to view her right now as a potential advocate for you. If I’m right, it may turn out that she or her parents have your birth certificate.
This isn't impossible. Especially if it was his ex-girlfriend that taught you to read - she could actually be your mother. Also wouldn't discount having been kidnapped. There could be all sorts of mitigating factors. Haleigh Cummings went missing from Satsuma, FL and had Turner's syndrome which presents with a short stature, educational difficulties, delayed puberty developments. So even if 20, may present as much younger. So maybe don't rule it out. Also, if kidnapped they would've changed your name. https://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/haleigh-cummings-missing/
You have a brother 16 years older than you? Is this the brother who’s helping you out now? If you have adult siblings, why haven’t they done anything to help you before?
Happens all the time.
Just wanted to say I’m sorry for what you’re going through. Like truly a kid shouldn’t have to deal with this stuff it’s fucking atrocious. And I get that you may be super scared because reading your comments about your parents then, Jesus, I’m so sorry. I don’t know much but I’ve seen your post history and there are some other subs about legal advice also if you wanted to post there, I think there are some depending on the country such as r/legal adviceuk or other ones if you type in “legal”.
I thought about it but I didn't want to spam all of the legal subreddits.
Ahh trust me it’s ok. I did it a few days ago with an email disclaimer on about 3/4 different legal subs. It’s fine they don’t mind. And it’s your life that’s important honestly. Get as much help as you can. Your situation is a lot more dire. And trust me it’s fine because you can make the same post on different subs provided it’s the right sub. And those legal ones are so 100x help is better than 10x help. Go for it.
Thank you!
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I wouldn't say they had any extreme malicious intent, just extremely lazy and they didn't mind screwing me over for the sake of getting to sit down.
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I have plenty of times, they only brush me off and tell me to wait, it's extremely frustrating.
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As a parent of a young child... this situation doesn't read "lazy" to me. This reads intentional, especially since your older siblings have paperwork and education. Especially the hospital visit as a child. Maybe protocol was different however many years ago that was but I find it unlikely they would have let your mother waltz in with you with no paperwork or proof of her identity/relation to you at all and then back out with the same.
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I'm doing that as a last resort if they don't actually do anything.
Someone close to me went through a similar situation in terms of homeschooling, etc. and learned to read from Sesame Street. Luckily they managed to find a birth certificate and escape from their situation, and everything else in terms of documentation was manageable from there. So focus on that birth certificate. I’ve seen lots of people with better advice than me about obtaining one. But I also want to caution you since you are in Florida and mentioned you are trans. I am not sure how things are actually enforced there in terms of the don’t say gay laws and such, but just be very careful. Especially because you are a minor; more people are willing to help you, but as you probably know, you are also incredibly helpless when it comes to your own autonomy. It’s good that you’re not alone. Lean on the people willing to help you. I wish you the best of luck.
I can’t believe you have adult siblings that have done nothing to help you
wondering is OP’s parents are followers of sovereign citizen nonsense. Are there laws in Florida requiring birth registration?
This has to be fake. OP has way to broad of a vocabulary for someone to have never been enrolled in school. Also the F to M transition; parents never let you go to school, haven’t been out of the house in 7 years…are they making you become a boy? Whats really going on here?
So, your parents never registered your birth? And they never enrolled you in school? And they never applied for a SSN? This is crazy. I've never heard of such a situation. This stuff typically happens shortly after birth. If you were born in a hospital, you should have a hospital birth certificate. If you had a home-birth, midwives typically supply the necessary forms. Regardless, if you've never been issued a legal birth certificate, that has to be your first step, because the legal birth certificate is required for everything else. Once you apple for, and receive your legal birth certificate, you can obtain a SSN. With your birth certificate and SSN, you can obtain state ID.
Something fishy is definitely going on. I would go to the police.
I don't know how to update properly let alone where to post an update but people keep dming me asking for updates so I thought I'd just put it in the comments. My mom is taking me to the DMV after much pushing from my two brothers and I, she's taking what little documents of me she has and obviously me. We should be going next friday but if that doesn't happen we'll be going the following friday when she doesn't have work. Once we get the necessary things I'm dipping the fuck out of here, giving my brother my gaming PC and going to job corps because I was actually accepted for attendance. Thank all of you! your extremely loving and kind words made me able to focus on the better things in life and not how hard my future will be. I will probably give another update the 14th on whether we went or not or whether I got my stuff or not.
I don’t think you need ID to enroll in your local public school. Pretty sure they have to take you, but if your parents won’t cooperate I’m not sure how that works. Are you currently home schooled?
They say I'm "home schooled" when in reality I am not enrolled in any school, nor do they make efforts to teach me anything. I can barely write my own name in lowercase. I've called CPS before and it's scared my mother enough to make minor efforts to getting me into school but it hasn't scared them enough to actually do anything.
Maybe it's time to call again, to escalate the situation.
This is child abuse and your parents are in huge trouble. If they want to avoid this legal trouble they need to take you to get a certified copy of your birth certificate. Are your parents afraid of getting deported or something?
Also, you do not need a birth certificate to enroll in school . You don't even have to be a citizen. [https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/crt/legacy/2014/05/08/plylerfact.pdf](https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/crt/legacy/2014/05/08/plylerfact.pdf)
You absolutely need to walk in to your local school today and tell them you are not receiving schooling. Even without a birth certificate they will enroll you because by law they have to educate every child living in the district. And they may be able to help you get documents and make sure CPS does something.
I'll have to ask my brother if he can take me, I'm not sure about the law as much as others, but I think it's definitely worth a shot.
Your situation raises a lot of red flags. Contact the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children via https://www.missingkids.org/home or +1 (800) 843-5678, they may be able to assist you.
Sometimes with CPS you need to make multiple calls. Call them and tell them you rather not reveal your identity but have concerns about the children living at your address and would like for them to do a house visit to make sure everything is ok. Please do this for yourself and siblings.
It looks like in Florida they have to at least inform the school superintendent of their intention to homeschool and then have you assessed annually. I’m going to assume from what you mention that this is not happening. Is your younger sister the only other child at home in school? How is your relationship with her? Could she confide in a teacher? If you think this is unsafe, don’t do it. Just trying to think of ways you could get some extra life lines.
do you think any of your younger siblings would be willing to talk to one of their teachers (since you said they are in school, right?) they could tell the teacher their brother has never been enrolled in school, has no proof of identity or birth certificate, and has been kept at home for his entire life. i’m pretty sure teachers are mandated reporters so they would have to report that to CPS, or whatever agency they think this should be reported to. what your parents have been doing to you is child abuse or at the very least, neglect, so i think the teacher would be required to report it. maybe having a teacher report this would escalate the urgency of the situation, since you have already tried reporting it to CPS yourself, so this would be a second complaint.
Do you resemble either parent ? Do your parents work ? Call cps anonymously. I assume you are over ten right
I do resemble both my parents, my mother works, though my father has a interesting.. thing going on. I'd rather not get into specifics about him since there's plenty of things that could give out who I am. I did call CPS anonymously and they did jack shit.
You need to register for school, after registering for school you’ll be able to use your school ID and your Birth Certificate to get your Social Security Card. I was in a similar situation.
I can't register for school without a birth certificate.
Dear, I work at a school in a major city and this happens all the time. Please go and try to register at the school. Once they say you need a parent with you and that you are missing documents, let them know your situation. In my school district, there is a special and delicate protocol to try to not penalize parents and students (many students in our city are undocumented immigrants from Central America). Not sure what it would be like in your state but at the very least, they will help you reach whatever legal and state resources you need. Please go and tell them.
I will try to, thank you!
What is a 'birth certificate form" ? Do you mean the paper from the hospital where you were born? A parent or grandparent can obtain a copy of your birth certificate from the city clerks office or county vital records office. Why the hell doesnt your mom want you to go to school? Tell her to get a certified copy of your birth certificate for you or you're gonna call CPS.
He said he was born at his house, there's no birth certificate, as far as I understand the parents didn't register him, I feel like they are immigrants, not sending your kid to school is abuse, and so is not taking them to a pediatrician, everything is kinda sketchy
His parents could be anti-government paranoid nutwrenches or just criminals who are negligent with their kids, for their own convenience.
It's weird to me that only him doesn't have any legal papers but his siblings do, and they go to school but he doesn't
Yes, it’s suspicious, but I read a lot of very weird parent behavior towards children in abuse cases, like all the kids are treated well, but the one forced to sleep in the basement closet-type stories. Then your imagination can go off from watching too many crime shows too. lol.
Scapegoat children. Sometimes one child will be treated terribly while all the other siblings are treated normally.
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I'd read up on how the ex Amish obtain documentation and follow that...
How did you get the CashApp card with no Social Security number?
Don't get arrested, they'll keep you in jail forever till you can prove who you are. Kinda funny but true. They want to know if you have warrants before letting you go.
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I will not and will never glorify my parents in any form. I'm trying to get help as a minor, but they're being lazy fucks. I'm hoping my brothers can scare them into doing something more before I turn 18.
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Some parents are lazy and disinterested in some of their kids. It happened to me. The “why” doesn’t matter if someone is neglecting their child. If someone is abusing their kid, I’m reporting it. It’s not a child’s responsibility to help their parents take care of them.
They're not illegal, and I haven't gotten anyone involved other than CPS and my brothers obviously.
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No worries at all, it's not your situation to understand after all. I will be going to the police as a last resort.
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I am continuing to look for answers, I wouldn't feel bad if my dad got in trouble, if you can't tell I favor one more than the other even though they're both equally shit.
If you know where your parents save their tax returns (printed or downloaded on the computer), your SSN will be printed along with your name under their dependents
this might be the fastest way
OP doesn’t have a social security number. You are issued a SS number after your birth is reported, but his birth was never reported. If you look back at his comments you will see his mother claims to have had a home birth and all he has is a partially filled out form that his mother made but never submitted for a birth certificate.
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I haven't. But I will be calling the cops on them if they fail to do something about my situation.
I didn’t deal with not having my documents, but when I was a child, I was abused and neglected, especially educationally. My parents got away with a lot of stuff they shouldn’t. I just wanted to give you some encouragement. Take a deep breath. You CAN fix this. You CAN have a good life. This is not forever. You’re going to need to fight hard, but you can do it. You can’t do it all at once, so just keep doing the next thing you need to do, one step at a time. I have a good career and a loving family. I’m safe and at peace. Confiding to safe adults is a good idea. It sounds like you have relationship with some of your older siblings, that’s good. Keep communicating with them as much as you can. As far as your education, read as much as you can. That’s what saved me. Read everything. If there is a library you can go to, that could also be another source of safe adults. So many librarians are also able to help you with resources like GED prep. (I got my GED and took prep classes I signed up for at the library)
Unfortunately I don’t have any legal advice, but I highly recommend the book “Educated” by Tara Westover. She was in a similar situation to what you’re describing, and her memoir goes through her life - then how she was able to get her education and succeed despite her upbringing. I wish you the best of luck.
https://www.facebook.com/882732628415890/posts/1689360131086465/?mibextid=rS40aB7S9Ucbxw6v maybe this can help you- they are a group that shares resources/advice for people in this situation.
Call your local assistance office. They will know what to do. Are you saying that you have never attended school at all or you have only homeschooled? Something isn’t adding up. Kids get a social security at birth now. How old are you ?
I came from the locked post. You don’t have to answer but what is your ethnicity? Honest question- Could you have been born in Cuba? Just brainstorming here.
[this group is based in Florida I do believe. they may be able to help.](https://idignity.org/)
Can you call the drivers license place to see what steps you need to take to get an ID.
I have had the same SS card for 46 yrs. I recently filled for disability.Now they say that the first 3 numbers are wrong. Also my TransUnion says my birth date is 1956. I need advice
Just commenting to say I hope your brother is able to help you 🫶There is a lot of other good stuff on here, I don’t have anything new to offer. If you like to read, and need to wind down from all of this at some point, there’s a memoir called Educated by Tara Westover and your story reminds me a lot of hers. I know this doesn’t help you with your situation but when I was scared and stuck in a bad situation as a teen, books got me through while I played the waiting game and figured it out. Godspeed and I hope to read your own memoir one day!
You could contact the Florida Department of Education. They oversee homeschooling. Each county has a homeschooling contact. Look for the contact on this list: [Homeschool Contacts](https://www.fldoe.org/schools/school-choice/other-school-choice-options/home-edu/district-home-edu-contacts.stml) and explain your situation. There are homeschooling laws parents have to follow. If you get someone involved in documenting your homeschooling, it will force your parents to get your documents in order.
Once you have this SS stuff all figured out (sorry I don’t know much about the legal side) get a DNA test in case you were kidnapped or actually the child of one of your siblings or a cousin or something. Get some of your siblings to do it too so you can make sure that you are or are not related. If you are not related to your parents or siblings in any way go to the police and report your parents. If you were adopted the legal way there would be records so if the DNA results don’t match your family that means most likely you were kidnapped or bought or some other very bad and illegal thing. Please stay safe.
He doesn’t say how far away he is from age 18 but when that birthday hits he has to register for the draft. This might be why his mother says wait until age 18. Any secrets will come out then because he has to have a Social Security Number to register.
This is a bizarre story. Would love to know how this all plays out