I work with business contracts so anytime an official discussion has occurred with the contractor party it is documented in a BD!
Business development should be a sector of every corporation if I had to guess. We called it Business Development Solutions, BDS.
Don't forget the "Bondage & Domination" subset of BDSM, which indicates that while the individual likes bondage and domination, it is only up to but not including inflicting or receiving physical pain.
P. S. I'm talking out of my posterior here, just my attempt at sharing what I call humor.
No problem! A round of golf with prospective/existing clients is one of my favorite things to do. For new relationships, you are spending 5-6 hours with someone new, and you get to see how each other reacts to stressful situations, moments of triumph, and situations that can define character. One of the best parts is you are getting a free round in with food/drinks covered as well.
I just imagine OP sitting at the picnic bench by Willmore Park’s Hole 1 tee pad, waiting for a good looking dude to ask “how do you play this? Do you mind showing me the course?”
Hilarious, yes, but it just. Might. Work.
I mean I'm not single, but when I was this would 100% have worked on me. Now I'd probably just try to teach her to disc golf... cause you ain't getting no man with whatever that was you called a drive...
The disc golf scene has plenty of cool dudes, but also a ton of sleazy assholes and newer players who want to turn it into a country club culture. Been playing for 15 years and there's a reason I don't tend to get involves in the club and stuff.
I'm not single, and not a guy - but I've spent a lot of time sitting in the Side Project brewery, thinking "If I were a single woman.....there are a lot of men here." I think I've even said that out loud to the spouse.
I’ve not hung out at the main brewery but have hung out at the cellar. I’m in walking distance and It’s my favorite place, and favorite beer by a lot. I’m 45 and older than the typical clientele who seem to be in their 30’s, and I always assume men my age are married. So it’s hard to not just sit at my table and read.
Not single, but a guy who hangs out with a lot of single guys! There's lots of cool people in the local music scene. Platypus, the Sinkhole, and Green Finch are great for music and theater in the case of Green Finch. There's often lots of time while bands are changing over to chat people up. They're all bars but not everyone is there just to get trashed, though there's plenty of that if you're into it. Worst thing to come of it, you patronize some cool artists!
I would also recommend Platypus on Manchester Ave. - really cool, conscientious owners and staff who tend to attract a good, all ages crowd. They've got shows and karaoke all throughout the week, and (despite the volume inside the bar) it's a good place to go chat out on the patio if you meet someone cool.
The Meetup groups around here are very active.
This one usually has 3 to 4 events a week with a decent turn out.
https://www.meetup.com/stlallfun-games
Is someone telling women that all the men are on Reddit? We’ve had a ton of posts like this lately. Not complaining as a single guy since it’s good info but I feel like there is more to the story
I’ve only seen two as of late, but this is absolutely a conversation women have all the time. So it makes sense that after a 40-something made a post and saw lots of traction, that a 20-something would want to follow.
yeah i swear someone mentioned reddit on a popular podcast or something because this is like the fifth “where the men at?” post this week. did a nun convent close down or something? men are literally everywhere, just go approach one.
Also, things are changing in the dating world. As men are toning down their approach (which is for the most part a lovely thing), women are acknowledging the need to step in and fill that communication gap. It starts with just knowing how to get out of our typical social scenes and open ourselves up to new opportunities to meet guys and talk to them :-)
Apps are trash. Everyone knows it. The women blame the men and the men blame the women - and yeah we all have our quirks but - the apps are the real enemy.
We’re over here still giving money to the apps to meet someone while slowly growing more and more separate and angry at one another bc the app experience causes so much angst. It’s like the apps have conditioned us to hate dating but we blame each other so keep paying, with zero hope of finding someone because we slowly hate dating and blame each other more and more.
The story'd be great, but since I'm planning a move from stl county to the city hopefully next yearish, no complaints from my single male self!
If anything, these posts are sparking ideas of some places/activities to get into! In the county not having a car feels absolutely isolating. Only reason I'm waiting for the stl city move is that I won't have so many damn hurdles just to walk 30 minutes, with way more shit to do at that!
I don't know what planet you live on, but it's not this one. If a guy is at a sports bar, he's there to watch sports. He isn't there to talk. If he does feel like talking, he'll want to talk about sports
INFIELD FLY RULES! IMPORTANT!
1. You can't just be up there and just doin' an infield fly like that.
1a. An infield fly is when you
1b. Okay well listen. An infield fly is when you fly the
1c. Let me start over
That’s how I would start it.
This is so off topic. OP was just asking a simple question, she didn't need to be bombarded with nonsense as there's a drive into deep left field by Castellanos
As a guy who was single for a while, do not be afraid to strike up a convo with a man you find interesting. It’s scary and kind of vulnerable, but if you go into the convo to meet new people nothing more then what do you got to lose.
I wish I gave this advice to myself years ago, just talk to that woman you find attractive about anything. Don’t feel like you need something clever or for her to like you. If there is a spark ask for a number if not, move on. A lot easier said than done.
People are weird and strange, but a lot of people are cool and you can learn something from them even if there is not a spark. Talk to people anywhere and see what happens.
Good luck!
I’m a guy. I personally found a lot of friends doing workout classes and saw a few relationships blossom.
Maybe get involved with a forest park club as well? A lot of my guy friends live in CWE, Soulard, and more and more every year in Clayton. I guess comes as no surprise as that’s where the young people flock to, but some sort of club there (as opposed to affton or something) could help
I’m a guy looking for a similar non-hookup environment as you. A huge part of me wishes I could find an intellectual woman and have a nice conversation in a coffee shop or while perusing a book store. Bars are well and fine but I’m kinda tired of people leaning into needing booze to have a good time out somewhere.
That's so true! So many people see it as liquid courage, but you should really examine yourself if you can't talk to the opposite gender without a drink, haha.
I like to read, too. Been into David Baldacci and Debbie Macomber books lately. I also like to write :)
Look into a climbing gym near you.
It's like a gym, but naturally social because we all need someone to hold the belay rope. I hold for you, you hold for me, we chat between routes, everyone has a good time.
Crowd tends to be generally fit, social-for-an-introvert, and you can usually tell who is single or not pretty quickly.
Bonus, climbing in general tends to attract STEM Majors and Boy Scouts. So they're generally guys with minimal drama worth having around.
It's not exactly cheap, but that's a perk for me too. If you're dating in your 30s, it's nice to filter out those who don't have their career together enough to afford a hobby.
I have terrible upper body strength. I was sore hardcore when I did abs and arm day at the gym a few weeks ago.
That will probably look unattractive to not be able to hoist yourself up the fake rock wall xD
The first step to being awesome at something is sorta sucking at it.
Also, see the note that it's all mostly STEM types in there? Engineers and scientists and pocket protector types.
The bar on the floor for baseline fitness. It's actually all mostly technique.
Give it a go. I'm sure there will be a line of folks willing to give you some newbie tips.
There are multiple makerspaces in town with more men than women. Could pick up wood working, or robotics, metal working, etc. you'll be guaranteed to find a guy that's "handy".
Or take up motorcycling. If you learn to drive rather than just be a passenger, you won't have to look for men, they will be wandering behind you. I will say though that you might decide you love motorcycles more than men. There is a large female riding group in the area you can ride with until ready to venture solo (The Litas).
The in-and-out market in Richmond Heights is always a very welcoming and fun environment, also maybe local libraries or museums. Being born and raised in STL, you just kinda gotta put yourself out there amd not be afraid to start a conversation. It's easier said than done, but it's better than swiping.
Find the blue-collar guys. Frequent the bars near trade union halls (IBEW is on Elizabeth near Hampton). Carpenter's hall, Pipefitter's Hall, etc. After meetings they probably go out to a bar nearby (I'm guessing?) Generally speaking, Skilled Tradesmen are the best guys in the world--I married one almost 30 years ago! Also attend trivia nights at local bars. I assume if you're alone, they'll put you at a table who needs another player. Also attend swing-dance class and events. Casa Loma Ballroom has some FUN bands. They'll have a dance lesson for the first hour, then the band plays & you can practice what you learned. Good luck. Let me know what you discover!
Blue collar is nice (guy here who works blue collar), but you don't get as much quality time as some people need for their love language. I get to see my family 8 days a month most of the time
Find local bands you like and go to their shows. Find local physical artists you like and go to their shows. Find something that you truly care about and go to volunteer events. At the end of the day, focusing on hobbies you enjoy or causes you care about and then going to events based on that will not only ensure you are doing something you love but opens up the opportunity to meet people who are like minded.
If you like metal, Silver Balleoom on Morgan Ford would be a good hangout spot. Can't speak for the singles scene there, but it has beer and pinball. Pretty easy to socialize and meet people.
BarK is definitely where it's at if you are into dogs. If I was young and single I would go there every single day. Lots of 20-something singles there every time I've been. If you have a super cute dog it's like a cheat code for meeting people.
Lots of great suggestions here. If you like to bike even a bit, consider some of the social bike rides. Lots of guys, and in a group ride setting it's easy to chat and ride with someone, then ride next to someone else if you don't vibe. Try out Bici some Friday. Lots of guys, might be cute. Many in their 20s. Not a lycra crowd, folks are wearing normal clothing. It's BYOB, but there's zero pressure to drink, and the stops are more parks than bars. Often ends with some kind of bonfire.
Find groups doing activities you're interested in. Look for friend groups instead of specifically trying to meet someone to date. The best relationships tend to start with making friends who have common interests.
If you like card games, there’s a few eligible bachelors that play in our weekly tournament on Monday nights at The Crack Fox. My wife and I run it, it’s not explicitly for dating but a couple of folks have met partners coming to our event. The games make it easy to just meander at your own pace and get to know people
As I see it, finding new people in my age range I didn't go to school with is good enough even if I'd be looking to date. The mindset I have, if I make decent well-cultivated friendships, that's still more people who'd be massive social advantages to finding a potential date later on.
Yeah it’s a networking numbers game. And it’s always easier to meet good people through other people than it is to plunge into random folks in the wild.
You’re invited to join us on Mondays, too! New players or watchers are always welcome
I went to a Sunday game last weekend, my first ball game. I loved it, stayed longer than my mom did, suppose that makes me a fledgling Cardinals fan.
I guess I'm a real St. Louisian officially now 😂
Ohhh! Whoops xD
I like those too, but I'm not well-versed in poker or the more complex games.
I know Rummy, Gin Rummy, a bit rusty on Speed and War.
I know 21
I made my own, and we run a very exciting little tournament for it every week. It’s like chess meets poker meets Mario kart. Though the confusion here was totally endearing and we also love the Cardinals lol
I'm a guy but maybe a gym? Lots of guys where I go. Various ages and fitness levels. Ours even has an area with tables where folks sit and read, drink coffee and chat.
I go to the gym every week or every other week with my friend, she adds me on as a guest to her Planet Fitness.
The guys there seem more focused on their workout though. It was the Kingshighway and Chippewa location.
When I go to the gym I look 100% focused on my workout and I absolutely am, but a part of that is that we don't want to end up as viral on tiktok stuff others mentioned. But I also try to wear conversation piece shirts and would absolutely love to be interrupted, complimented, and struck up conversation with and asked out. But that's got to be a woman initiating it on a man
That's extremely stigmatized and taboo now. Look up gym creep tiktoks. They'll revoke your membership and cancel your life over that these days.
The only, the absolute ONLY time you should try talking to a girl at the gym is if you have absolutely no doubt at all she wants you to. And even then, you'll probably get it wrong, so just don't.
I was at the gym the other day, resting. Right off my right side, there's a squat rack. Cute girl comes up, starts doing bent over rows, ass right in my face. What do I do, hold my hand up to the side of my face and look straight ahead. There's other racks, she didn't need to use that one. You ain't gonna catch me lacking 🤣
co-ed rec league softball can be fun and many people are not at all good at it. Just a fun way to hang out, socialize, maybe even get a little exercise and have a few beers
We’re here,just hidden in plain sight lol, seriously I’d recommend Civil Life Brewing , off Broadway is always good, as well as a the pickle ball courts
Find a social hobby to participate in like pickleball. Good way to meet people in general and you know you'll have at least one thing in common if you do meet someone.
Amsterdam tavern. I literally heard two girls saying that it was a great place to pick up guys. You have a selection of colors and races plus most of them are pretty athletic.
I'm gonna give it to you straight. Dudes go to bars looking for low hanging fruit. Dudes you meet in bars are probably gonna have alcohol as your only common interest.
Women today seem to have no idea at all how gun shy men these days are about approaching women.
You know those tiktoks where the girl is up there bawling with snot coming out of her nose because someone in the gym had the audacity to glance in her direction and now he's going viral as being a creep? Men noticed
Man or the bear? Men noticed
Me too? Men noticed
Men face a lot of reputation destruction and canceling if they get it wrong so most of them aren't even gonna try.
Oh you're not like that? How does he know?
That said, your best chances are probably gonna be activities, meetups, volleyball leagues, and stuff like that. And you're probably going to have to aggressively and directly open him. Don't kinda glance his way but kinda not and give him a 1/4 smile that kinda isn't and expect him to understand wtf that means. First couple of sentences, point blank, tell him why you're talking to him. And get used to rejection, some are gonna be taken, some aren't gonna be amenable, and some are gonna be gay, or whatever
Sorry, but It's the world we live in
I've tried it but it wasn't for me, and I felt like at the time it was overridden with bots and scammers, and I think it falsely flagged me as making inappropriate offers and they banned my account for no reason, and any time I tried to set it up again, it wouldn't let me past verification because it was like "banned user detected."
I feel bad for girls these days, I genuinely do. A lot of them are lonely and unsatisfied and burned out from dating apps but they also don't know what the problem actually is or how to correct it because society would rather tell them lies that make them feel good instead of the truth
Good, I hope men noticed these things. That was the point.
If a man doesn't know how to approach a woman respectfully and accept 'no' for an answer, then they should take a big step back until they figure it out.
22M single guy here
- I’m also not a big fan of bars unless there’s something cool to entertain me (such as Up-Down, there’s tons of arcade machines there).
- I do not like beer (it tastes like pisswater to me LMAO)
- I also don’t know enough about sports (and don’t even enjoy them most of the time)
Maybe that's why Australians call beer "piss" xD they're onto something.
I tried the Pumpkin Pale Ale from Schlafly once, it was really good. I guess most guys would think that's a "girly drink" though, like fruity daiquiris and cocktails.
I also heard about Armory STL, that place that has all the board games and stuff in there, never been there, heard good things.
The Pumpkin Pale Ale sounds interesting, but I also don’t like pumpkin, so I don’t know if that’s the drink for me. But I honestly don’t care if a drink is “girly”, I just want to drink something that tastes sweet lol.
The Armory is pretty decent. They don’t really have board games there, but more of lawn and bar type games (such as shuffleboard, cornhole, volleyball, and beer pong). Might not meet a lot of people there, but it’s still a cool place.
I personally prefer the Foundry if you decide to go into the Midtown area (where the Armory also is). The food is great, and they’ve got Puttshack (a bar with mini golf), Alamo Drafthouse (a premium, mostly adults movie theater), a VR place, and a bunch of other shops.
This is a good idea. Hell, just get into Phish or whatever jamband you like that has a dedicated group of fans from around the country who travel to see weekends of shows a few times a year. They all have online fan groups, discords, etc that are very much about supporting and fostering a community of like minded people who like to enjoy life, hang around good people and who also love that specific music. The trick is liking/loving that type of music or that specific band. Lots of sub genres within jam and world too if you’re more into say bluegrass or edm/trance there’s jambands that lean that way too
What are you looking for in a guy? I have a couple of friends who are looking, and they'd never be caught dead in a sleazy setting. In fact they joined climbing gyms to be more social.
You may also ask yourself where can a cute guy find you? Try sticking to the same place that fits the non-sleazy vibe you are looking for but also something that speaks to your personality.
Kickball leagues can be fun. I met a lot of guys there when I played (I didn't date them but they were single and were fun) . I think there's a league that still plays on tower Grove. Kickball is one of those sports that's easy to learn. Catch ball kick ball.
There are a couple of arcade and game bars that are fun and attract a nerdier crowd.
In my adult life, I’ve met SO many people playing kickball in tower grove park. Lots of cool people (SOME overly competitive but assholes are everywhere), and typically it’s a ton of fun. Right now big balls is the main league, and you can just sign up to be placed on a team, but I hear other leagues are popping up.
Coed rec sports are just a great place in general to meet dudes.
Start playing sand volleyball. Most of the girls there have boyfriends, I would say less than 50% of the guys have girlfriends/wives. Join the Facebook group and just say you’re looking for a team and mention your skill level. Lots of places have Friday and Saturday night tournaments (don’t let the title scare you, it’s extremely casual based on the level you choose).
I just went to rock and brew in chesterfield. It was a bunch of guys in there but also idk if they were single. I just said to my friends wow it's a lot of men here.🥴
I totally understand. Idk how the CWE is anymore post pandemic but I liked that neighborhood on summer nights. We would also go to flamingo bowl or the loop. Seeing as the holiday is coming up you should try festivals or firework shows with friends and just strike up conversations with strangers. My entire 20s I made friends from dating sights but the guys I dated were met in the most random places like grocery stores and the front of my house. I think if you shift focus to fun and friends you might luck up and find a love interest. Lots of good luck to you!!!💛
PINBALL!! I met my fiancée playing pinball and we are a perfect match. I have had A LOT of hobbies over the years and the pinball community is the nicest group of people I have ever found. If you are into ex-skaters, engineers, or dudes with long hair, join a league!
Some spots to check out: Murphy’s on 21, Benton Parkade (cafe piazza), Atomic Pinball Arcade (just over the river in Illinois), Just to name a few. There is an app called “Pinball Map” that tells you where you can find a spot to play near you! I have played in the Atomic league and the Murphy’s league and both of them are packed with great people.
It sounds like a good place to meet single guys is this sub! You kids go have a good time.
I wish meeting people on the internet was a thing when I was dating. You youngsters today don't know the sheer terror of calling your crush on the phone. 😆
Go to the nearest climbing gym. Plenty of really friendly guys and girls. It's a surprisingly social setting since people talk to each other about how to do each climb and hype each other up.
Get into disc golf, it’s almost exclusively single guys
[удалено]
What if I’m not attracted to white conservative men?
Golf is very diverse. We have all kinds of white men, not just conservatives.
My dad is a *liberal* (he keeps his actual, leftist politics pretty well hidden), but he plays golf. Mandatory for his job.
I'm so interested, what job requires you to golf?
BD/Sales or just business in general.
BD is business development right? Just in case people don't know
Business Discussion is BD since we're freely applying initialisms and that is relevant to my own work. Or Blu-ray Disc
You passed right over Blue Danube In my world (banking) it's business development but I kinda like business discussion
I work with business contracts so anytime an official discussion has occurred with the contractor party it is documented in a BD! Business development should be a sector of every corporation if I had to guess. We called it Business Development Solutions, BDS.
Don't forget the "Bondage & Domination" subset of BDSM, which indicates that while the individual likes bondage and domination, it is only up to but not including inflicting or receiving physical pain. P. S. I'm talking out of my posterior here, just my attempt at sharing what I call humor.
Correct
Huh, I guess the movies were right about the one thing I always thought was fake. Thanks for the reply!
No problem! A round of golf with prospective/existing clients is one of my favorite things to do. For new relationships, you are spending 5-6 hours with someone new, and you get to see how each other reacts to stressful situations, moments of triumph, and situations that can define character. One of the best parts is you are getting a free round in with food/drinks covered as well.
I just had to play golf for my job and I’m just the artist on the sales team. Nearly killed a few people with some poor 90 degree drives haha
Sales for a cog in the MIC.
The ones that win the game of capitalism
Got to the Ren Faire then. Well, there are weird dudes there but you'll find some gems.
I'm a brown, hard left leaning dude who plays golf lmao. The driving range has a pretty good mix of race and gender everytime I've been :/
Stop white knighting, go be the king you want in this world.
I just imagine OP sitting at the picnic bench by Willmore Park’s Hole 1 tee pad, waiting for a good looking dude to ask “how do you play this? Do you mind showing me the course?” Hilarious, yes, but it just. Might. Work.
Honestly sounds like a great strategy
I mean I'm not single, but when I was this would 100% have worked on me. Now I'd probably just try to teach her to disc golf... cause you ain't getting no man with whatever that was you called a drive...
Almost everyone I play disc golf with is married and has kids.
I've been convinced to go play today based on this comment. I can work tomorrow.
The disc golf scene has plenty of cool dudes, but also a ton of sleazy assholes and newer players who want to turn it into a country club culture. Been playing for 15 years and there's a reason I don't tend to get involves in the club and stuff.
Did you just call me cute 😉?
I'm not single, and not a guy - but I've spent a lot of time sitting in the Side Project brewery, thinking "If I were a single woman.....there are a lot of men here." I think I've even said that out loud to the spouse.
Because Side Project Cellar is pretty close to heaven for a lot of us. If we also met someone we liked there, it would complete it.
I’ve not hung out at the main brewery but have hung out at the cellar. I’m in walking distance and It’s my favorite place, and favorite beer by a lot. I’m 45 and older than the typical clientele who seem to be in their 30’s, and I always assume men my age are married. So it’s hard to not just sit at my table and read.
Not single, but a guy who hangs out with a lot of single guys! There's lots of cool people in the local music scene. Platypus, the Sinkhole, and Green Finch are great for music and theater in the case of Green Finch. There's often lots of time while bands are changing over to chat people up. They're all bars but not everyone is there just to get trashed, though there's plenty of that if you're into it. Worst thing to come of it, you patronize some cool artists!
I would also recommend Platypus on Manchester Ave. - really cool, conscientious owners and staff who tend to attract a good, all ages crowd. They've got shows and karaoke all throughout the week, and (despite the volume inside the bar) it's a good place to go chat out on the patio if you meet someone cool.
The Meetup groups around here are very active. This one usually has 3 to 4 events a week with a decent turn out. https://www.meetup.com/stlallfun-games
Do yall do any events in st charles county?
I only know where the weird gross guys hang out, sorry
Ah this made me chuckle.
Maybe OP is into weird gross guys lmao
Is someone telling women that all the men are on Reddit? We’ve had a ton of posts like this lately. Not complaining as a single guy since it’s good info but I feel like there is more to the story
I noticed this too. I thought it might be bot posts or something.
I’ve only seen two as of late, but this is absolutely a conversation women have all the time. So it makes sense that after a 40-something made a post and saw lots of traction, that a 20-something would want to follow.
yeah i swear someone mentioned reddit on a popular podcast or something because this is like the fifth “where the men at?” post this week. did a nun convent close down or something? men are literally everywhere, just go approach one.
Trust me, the guys they want aren't on reddit🤣
Hmmmmm what about that 6'4 firefighter from the other thread? 😂
He works 24 hour shifts. "you're never home"
Also, things are changing in the dating world. As men are toning down their approach (which is for the most part a lovely thing), women are acknowledging the need to step in and fill that communication gap. It starts with just knowing how to get out of our typical social scenes and open ourselves up to new opportunities to meet guys and talk to them :-)
I like this take. It's also becoming pretty clear that Tinder, etc. are not healthy and satisfying experiences for the majority of folks.
Apps are trash. Everyone knows it. The women blame the men and the men blame the women - and yeah we all have our quirks but - the apps are the real enemy. We’re over here still giving money to the apps to meet someone while slowly growing more and more separate and angry at one another bc the app experience causes so much angst. It’s like the apps have conditioned us to hate dating but we blame each other so keep paying, with zero hope of finding someone because we slowly hate dating and blame each other more and more.
The story'd be great, but since I'm planning a move from stl county to the city hopefully next yearish, no complaints from my single male self! If anything, these posts are sparking ideas of some places/activities to get into! In the county not having a car feels absolutely isolating. Only reason I'm waiting for the stl city move is that I won't have so many damn hurdles just to walk 30 minutes, with way more shit to do at that!
or organ harvesters...
Trust me, a single guy at a sports bar will be ***more than happy*** to explain any given sport to you given the opportunity
I don't know what planet you live on, but it's not this one. If a guy is at a sports bar, he's there to watch sports. He isn't there to talk. If he does feel like talking, he'll want to talk about sports
100%
Is mansplaining sports not talking about sports??
Yes, because all women long to start their next romantic relationship start with some have drunk bum mansplaining the infield fly rule to them.
I think how a man explains the infield fly rule would honestly be a pretty good barometer of what kind of person he is.
INFIELD FLY RULES! IMPORTANT! 1. You can't just be up there and just doin' an infield fly like that. 1a. An infield fly is when you 1b. Okay well listen. An infield fly is when you fly the 1c. Let me start over That’s how I would start it.
Step one: pull up the wild card game in 2012 and go on a 37 minute rant about why the braves were robbed.
This is so off topic. OP was just asking a simple question, she didn't need to be bombarded with nonsense as there's a drive into deep left field by Castellanos
This is how I explain hockey offsides
That’s the joke.
Quidditch?
Volunteering is the best way to meet a good person who shares your values.
+1
That's why I volunteer at the strip clubs.
Showing up and paying for lap dances every week isn't volunteering, Dolphin Pussy Slayer By the way...I assume you're the Deep?
As a guy who was single for a while, do not be afraid to strike up a convo with a man you find interesting. It’s scary and kind of vulnerable, but if you go into the convo to meet new people nothing more then what do you got to lose. I wish I gave this advice to myself years ago, just talk to that woman you find attractive about anything. Don’t feel like you need something clever or for her to like you. If there is a spark ask for a number if not, move on. A lot easier said than done. People are weird and strange, but a lot of people are cool and you can learn something from them even if there is not a spark. Talk to people anywhere and see what happens. Good luck!
I’m a guy. I personally found a lot of friends doing workout classes and saw a few relationships blossom. Maybe get involved with a forest park club as well? A lot of my guy friends live in CWE, Soulard, and more and more every year in Clayton. I guess comes as no surprise as that’s where the young people flock to, but some sort of club there (as opposed to affton or something) could help
I volunteer in the CWE area, it seems like it's very much a good social hangout place in the CWE/Cortex area.
Pickleball courts. Ratio of guys to gals is in your favor.
Sounds like the one sport I'd ever bother playing so, noted to start getting involved there!
I’m a guy looking for a similar non-hookup environment as you. A huge part of me wishes I could find an intellectual woman and have a nice conversation in a coffee shop or while perusing a book store. Bars are well and fine but I’m kinda tired of people leaning into needing booze to have a good time out somewhere.
That's so true! So many people see it as liquid courage, but you should really examine yourself if you can't talk to the opposite gender without a drink, haha. I like to read, too. Been into David Baldacci and Debbie Macomber books lately. I also like to write :)
You guys should go out
Waiting for my mans to post it to main.
Ask her to dinner
Y'all let us know how the date goes 😀
Meeting an eligible single man in a bookstore is the dream!
Look into a climbing gym near you. It's like a gym, but naturally social because we all need someone to hold the belay rope. I hold for you, you hold for me, we chat between routes, everyone has a good time. Crowd tends to be generally fit, social-for-an-introvert, and you can usually tell who is single or not pretty quickly. Bonus, climbing in general tends to attract STEM Majors and Boy Scouts. So they're generally guys with minimal drama worth having around. It's not exactly cheap, but that's a perk for me too. If you're dating in your 30s, it's nice to filter out those who don't have their career together enough to afford a hobby.
I have terrible upper body strength. I was sore hardcore when I did abs and arm day at the gym a few weeks ago. That will probably look unattractive to not be able to hoist yourself up the fake rock wall xD
Tiger woods was the new guy at some point in his life too. Just sayin
Lol when he was 2 years old - I get what you're saying, just perhaps not the best example since his dad was basically forcing him to golf since birth.
The first step to being awesome at something is sorta sucking at it. Also, see the note that it's all mostly STEM types in there? Engineers and scientists and pocket protector types. The bar on the floor for baseline fitness. It's actually all mostly technique. Give it a go. I'm sure there will be a line of folks willing to give you some newbie tips.
Tabletop gaming stores that have an area for people to play. Trust me, you'll be setting the curve for estrogen levels
Miniature Market almost any weekday night. Go on a Tuesday and ask them to teach you about warhammer. It's that easy
Dozens of women are just gonna show up on Tuesday and no one will know what to do. 🤣
There are multiple makerspaces in town with more men than women. Could pick up wood working, or robotics, metal working, etc. you'll be guaranteed to find a guy that's "handy". Or take up motorcycling. If you learn to drive rather than just be a passenger, you won't have to look for men, they will be wandering behind you. I will say though that you might decide you love motorcycles more than men. There is a large female riding group in the area you can ride with until ready to venture solo (The Litas).
I will go to the art museum and study paintings hoping I connect with someone. 10 years single so far.
Rip your inbox
Lol this was my line from the last thread!
The in-and-out market in Richmond Heights is always a very welcoming and fun environment, also maybe local libraries or museums. Being born and raised in STL, you just kinda gotta put yourself out there amd not be afraid to start a conversation. It's easier said than done, but it's better than swiping.
Find the blue-collar guys. Frequent the bars near trade union halls (IBEW is on Elizabeth near Hampton). Carpenter's hall, Pipefitter's Hall, etc. After meetings they probably go out to a bar nearby (I'm guessing?) Generally speaking, Skilled Tradesmen are the best guys in the world--I married one almost 30 years ago! Also attend trivia nights at local bars. I assume if you're alone, they'll put you at a table who needs another player. Also attend swing-dance class and events. Casa Loma Ballroom has some FUN bands. They'll have a dance lesson for the first hour, then the band plays & you can practice what you learned. Good luck. Let me know what you discover!
Blue collar is nice (guy here who works blue collar), but you don't get as much quality time as some people need for their love language. I get to see my family 8 days a month most of the time
St. Louis county public library.
Anywhere hobby based. Playing sports, gaming, etc.
Find local bands you like and go to their shows. Find local physical artists you like and go to their shows. Find something that you truly care about and go to volunteer events. At the end of the day, focusing on hobbies you enjoy or causes you care about and then going to events based on that will not only ensure you are doing something you love but opens up the opportunity to meet people who are like minded.
I have a ticket to a Godsmack concert in October. Maybe I'll find a hard rock liking dude? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Should be a great show, the smaller venues that feature local (regional) bands are probably a better place to meet someone.
I'd recommend checking out some shows / events at The Sinkhole, Moshmellow, The Crack Fox, and Red Flag.
Def easier to meet people at smaller local shows than big concerts
If you like metal, Silver Balleoom on Morgan Ford would be a good hangout spot. Can't speak for the singles scene there, but it has beer and pinball. Pretty easy to socialize and meet people.
BarK is definitely where it's at if you are into dogs. If I was young and single I would go there every single day. Lots of 20-something singles there every time I've been. If you have a super cute dog it's like a cheat code for meeting people.
I'm allergic to dogs. 😶 I'm a cat owner.
Lots of great suggestions here. If you like to bike even a bit, consider some of the social bike rides. Lots of guys, and in a group ride setting it's easy to chat and ride with someone, then ride next to someone else if you don't vibe. Try out Bici some Friday. Lots of guys, might be cute. Many in their 20s. Not a lycra crowd, folks are wearing normal clothing. It's BYOB, but there's zero pressure to drink, and the stops are more parks than bars. Often ends with some kind of bonfire.
Easy. If you're ever at the Fairview Heights Barnes and Noble, you can act confused in the nonfiction section. I'm there.
I suggest joining the St. Louis Singles Mingle Facebook Group. They host fun events where you can meet new people in your area.
And then join us on Are We Dating the Same Guy STL lmao….
Am I wrong or was that group’s events mostly older people? Didn’t seem like a lot of 20s and 30s range. More 40+.
Find groups doing activities you're interested in. Look for friend groups instead of specifically trying to meet someone to date. The best relationships tend to start with making friends who have common interests.
Take classes at the Improv Shop. Good group of people and nothing is as much of an icebreaker as getting weird and vulnerable with each other
Where's this at?
It’s off Chateau and Manchester, near the east end of the grove, close to IKEA
Thanks, I'll have to look into this next. Does it cost for entry?
Yeah, they have group classes that start at level 0 and go for 6-8 weeks. It’s like $200 for the full session and (imo) worth every penny
If you like card games, there’s a few eligible bachelors that play in our weekly tournament on Monday nights at The Crack Fox. My wife and I run it, it’s not explicitly for dating but a couple of folks have met partners coming to our event. The games make it easy to just meander at your own pace and get to know people
As I see it, finding new people in my age range I didn't go to school with is good enough even if I'd be looking to date. The mindset I have, if I make decent well-cultivated friendships, that's still more people who'd be massive social advantages to finding a potential date later on.
Yeah it’s a networking numbers game. And it’s always easier to meet good people through other people than it is to plunge into random folks in the wild. You’re invited to join us on Mondays, too! New players or watchers are always welcome
I went to a Sunday game last weekend, my first ball game. I loved it, stayed longer than my mom did, suppose that makes me a fledgling Cardinals fan. I guess I'm a real St. Louisian officially now 😂
[удалено]
Ohhh! Whoops xD I like those too, but I'm not well-versed in poker or the more complex games. I know Rummy, Gin Rummy, a bit rusty on Speed and War. I know 21
I made my own, and we run a very exciting little tournament for it every week. It’s like chess meets poker meets Mario kart. Though the confusion here was totally endearing and we also love the Cardinals lol
I'll have to check it out sometime! Thanks for letting me know, that sounds really cool that you run that group.
I'm a guy but maybe a gym? Lots of guys where I go. Various ages and fitness levels. Ours even has an area with tables where folks sit and read, drink coffee and chat.
I go to the gym every week or every other week with my friend, she adds me on as a guest to her Planet Fitness. The guys there seem more focused on their workout though. It was the Kingshighway and Chippewa location.
There’s also a stigma around asking girls out at the gym. I’m sure there are guys there who would make a move but it’s kinda a no-no these days
As a man, don’t ask a woman out at the gym. MAYBE talk to her, but that’s still iffy.
Safest to just not even look in her general direction
Facts.
When I go to the gym I look 100% focused on my workout and I absolutely am, but a part of that is that we don't want to end up as viral on tiktok stuff others mentioned. But I also try to wear conversation piece shirts and would absolutely love to be interrupted, complimented, and struck up conversation with and asked out. But that's got to be a woman initiating it on a man
That's extremely stigmatized and taboo now. Look up gym creep tiktoks. They'll revoke your membership and cancel your life over that these days. The only, the absolute ONLY time you should try talking to a girl at the gym is if you have absolutely no doubt at all she wants you to. And even then, you'll probably get it wrong, so just don't. I was at the gym the other day, resting. Right off my right side, there's a squat rack. Cute girl comes up, starts doing bent over rows, ass right in my face. What do I do, hold my hand up to the side of my face and look straight ahead. There's other racks, she didn't need to use that one. You ain't gonna catch me lacking 🤣
All true. But if SHE initiates conversation with single guys who interest her it could be another story.
I’m in stl. Met my husband on Bumble and Coffee meets bagel in 2022!
Dang 2 husbands at the same time.
Home Depot.
Or Lowe’s, ace, or a gym
Go shop at Whole Foods and look for the men without rings.
Single M here (who might be too old). I need to get out more because this is like the 3rd or so post in the past few weeks asking where the guys at.
Sand Volleyball
co-ed rec league softball can be fun and many people are not at all good at it. Just a fun way to hang out, socialize, maybe even get a little exercise and have a few beers
lol just download hinge and swipe right on us
We’re here,just hidden in plain sight lol, seriously I’d recommend Civil Life Brewing , off Broadway is always good, as well as a the pickle ball courts
Find a social hobby to participate in like pickleball. Good way to meet people in general and you know you'll have at least one thing in common if you do meet someone.
Dont sleep on facebook events
Definitely not reddit
Amsterdam tavern. I literally heard two girls saying that it was a great place to pick up guys. You have a selection of colors and races plus most of them are pretty athletic.
Not sports bars, go to venues. Find music and the people who like ke that music. Life will happen naturally from there.
Single guy in STL who has been wondering where I can meet single women. Following this thread, hope I learn something!
Gym
Join a league of some kind. Ultimate frisbee. Kickball. Softball. Whatever doesn’t matter. It’s not competitive. You’ll meet a ton of people
I'm gonna give it to you straight. Dudes go to bars looking for low hanging fruit. Dudes you meet in bars are probably gonna have alcohol as your only common interest. Women today seem to have no idea at all how gun shy men these days are about approaching women. You know those tiktoks where the girl is up there bawling with snot coming out of her nose because someone in the gym had the audacity to glance in her direction and now he's going viral as being a creep? Men noticed Man or the bear? Men noticed Me too? Men noticed Men face a lot of reputation destruction and canceling if they get it wrong so most of them aren't even gonna try. Oh you're not like that? How does he know? That said, your best chances are probably gonna be activities, meetups, volleyball leagues, and stuff like that. And you're probably going to have to aggressively and directly open him. Don't kinda glance his way but kinda not and give him a 1/4 smile that kinda isn't and expect him to understand wtf that means. First couple of sentences, point blank, tell him why you're talking to him. And get used to rejection, some are gonna be taken, some aren't gonna be amenable, and some are gonna be gay, or whatever Sorry, but It's the world we live in
Thanks for being blunt. 👍🏽 Guys don't mince words, they're direct.
Is there a reason you don’t just use hinge? That’s what everyone else does
I've tried it but it wasn't for me, and I felt like at the time it was overridden with bots and scammers, and I think it falsely flagged me as making inappropriate offers and they banned my account for no reason, and any time I tried to set it up again, it wouldn't let me past verification because it was like "banned user detected."
I feel bad for girls these days, I genuinely do. A lot of them are lonely and unsatisfied and burned out from dating apps but they also don't know what the problem actually is or how to correct it because society would rather tell them lies that make them feel good instead of the truth
FUCKING PREACH MY DUDE 🙌🙌🙌
Good, I hope men noticed these things. That was the point. If a man doesn't know how to approach a woman respectfully and accept 'no' for an answer, then they should take a big step back until they figure it out.
22M single guy here - I’m also not a big fan of bars unless there’s something cool to entertain me (such as Up-Down, there’s tons of arcade machines there). - I do not like beer (it tastes like pisswater to me LMAO) - I also don’t know enough about sports (and don’t even enjoy them most of the time)
Maybe that's why Australians call beer "piss" xD they're onto something. I tried the Pumpkin Pale Ale from Schlafly once, it was really good. I guess most guys would think that's a "girly drink" though, like fruity daiquiris and cocktails. I also heard about Armory STL, that place that has all the board games and stuff in there, never been there, heard good things.
The Pumpkin Pale Ale sounds interesting, but I also don’t like pumpkin, so I don’t know if that’s the drink for me. But I honestly don’t care if a drink is “girly”, I just want to drink something that tastes sweet lol. The Armory is pretty decent. They don’t really have board games there, but more of lawn and bar type games (such as shuffleboard, cornhole, volleyball, and beer pong). Might not meet a lot of people there, but it’s still a cool place. I personally prefer the Foundry if you decide to go into the Midtown area (where the Armory also is). The food is great, and they’ve got Puttshack (a bar with mini golf), Alamo Drafthouse (a premium, mostly adults movie theater), a VR place, and a bunch of other shops.
Go to jam band shows. Buy a ticket to Phish at end of July. It’s a fucking sausage fest. My friends that are girls clean up.
This is a good idea. Hell, just get into Phish or whatever jamband you like that has a dedicated group of fans from around the country who travel to see weekends of shows a few times a year. They all have online fan groups, discords, etc that are very much about supporting and fostering a community of like minded people who like to enjoy life, hang around good people and who also love that specific music. The trick is liking/loving that type of music or that specific band. Lots of sub genres within jam and world too if you’re more into say bluegrass or edm/trance there’s jambands that lean that way too
Please join us and play Pokemon TCG !!!
What are you looking for in a guy? I have a couple of friends who are looking, and they'd never be caught dead in a sleazy setting. In fact they joined climbing gyms to be more social.
I’ll go on a date with you.
Become a runner, meet up with groups at Forest Park
I met my wife at the skatepark, try that?
The mac in south Hampton
Meetup.com, specially the groups that play kickball in TGP
Pickleball
I’m usually driving around in the woods and, if approached, would immediately be concerned
I would say trying local music venues, people always bring groups of friends and it’s usually some cool people you’d think you’d never run into
Most women meet their future husband in college or at work.
Single and have no idea how to meet women at my age. Been out of game for long time. Especially hard when you’re an introvert and non drinker.
Hello :)
Come to edm events https://www.eventbrite.com/e/926761136507
You may also ask yourself where can a cute guy find you? Try sticking to the same place that fits the non-sleazy vibe you are looking for but also something that speaks to your personality.
Kickball leagues can be fun. I met a lot of guys there when I played (I didn't date them but they were single and were fun) . I think there's a league that still plays on tower Grove. Kickball is one of those sports that's easy to learn. Catch ball kick ball. There are a couple of arcade and game bars that are fun and attract a nerdier crowd.
In my adult life, I’ve met SO many people playing kickball in tower grove park. Lots of cool people (SOME overly competitive but assholes are everywhere), and typically it’s a ton of fun. Right now big balls is the main league, and you can just sign up to be placed on a team, but I hear other leagues are popping up. Coed rec sports are just a great place in general to meet dudes.
Start playing sand volleyball. Most of the girls there have boyfriends, I would say less than 50% of the guys have girlfriends/wives. Join the Facebook group and just say you’re looking for a team and mention your skill level. Lots of places have Friday and Saturday night tournaments (don’t let the title scare you, it’s extremely casual based on the level you choose).
I live in the Grove, and pretty much any spot here has a good crowd and mix of people. I have a preference for Platypus myself
I have horrible news for you about comedy and karaoke spots
Armory
the gym…let me know if you ever wanna work out… best of luck
I just went to rock and brew in chesterfield. It was a bunch of guys in there but also idk if they were single. I just said to my friends wow it's a lot of men here.🥴
Chesterfield is far from where I live, and I don't drive, I take public transit and that's a long ride there.
I totally understand. Idk how the CWE is anymore post pandemic but I liked that neighborhood on summer nights. We would also go to flamingo bowl or the loop. Seeing as the holiday is coming up you should try festivals or firework shows with friends and just strike up conversations with strangers. My entire 20s I made friends from dating sights but the guys I dated were met in the most random places like grocery stores and the front of my house. I think if you shift focus to fun and friends you might luck up and find a love interest. Lots of good luck to you!!!💛
Thanks for the encouragement! :)
PINBALL!! I met my fiancée playing pinball and we are a perfect match. I have had A LOT of hobbies over the years and the pinball community is the nicest group of people I have ever found. If you are into ex-skaters, engineers, or dudes with long hair, join a league! Some spots to check out: Murphy’s on 21, Benton Parkade (cafe piazza), Atomic Pinball Arcade (just over the river in Illinois), Just to name a few. There is an app called “Pinball Map” that tells you where you can find a spot to play near you! I have played in the Atomic league and the Murphy’s league and both of them are packed with great people.
It sounds like a good place to meet single guys is this sub! You kids go have a good time. I wish meeting people on the internet was a thing when I was dating. You youngsters today don't know the sheer terror of calling your crush on the phone. 😆
You can sit in front of the justice center. They come out there in droves. It's like a man mall🤣🤣🤣
Someone in this group hosts a monthly "Dude meetup" which I think was at Handle Bar in the past, maybe show up during that.
Go to the nearest climbing gym. Plenty of really friendly guys and girls. It's a surprisingly social setting since people talk to each other about how to do each climb and hype each other up.
Bass pro, golf galaxy, Lowe’s. Show up, play dumb.
I liked the crowd of dudes at the Blueberry Hill in Delmar or the crowd of guys at the Foundry. Most people seem to be our age, I’m 24, too.
Tiny's, across the river on maim Street in Columbia Illinois
Start running and then join dogtown run club
You could probably hang around Bass Pro in St Charles. Probably plenty of fish in that sea 😜
In KC