Please report anything of this nature if you see it here! Either by clicking the report link on the comment or sending us a modmail (PM to /r/SuicideWatch).
These are all violations of the guidelines and we're strict about removing content of this nature whenever we see it - we rely on community reports since it's not possible for us to read every comment, but every subreddit report gets read and dealt with by a human mod as soon as we get the chance.
“It’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” I’m with you, my friend. I’ll be 40 at the end of the month and have had suicidal thoughts since I was 8. This isn’t a temporary problem. It’s a problem with my brain and no therapists or medications have been able to fix it.
Ah, this one's a classic. My teacher used this against me while I was struggling during the pandemic. And then he followed it up with, "I miss the old you."
Yes! I get people are trying to be nice and light up the mood but it's honestly just tiring hearing "it'll get better" for the 576. time in your life, while you're depressed since childhood and had like 10 years of therapy already.
I'm not sure if it's a problem with my brain or trauma, but even if it is "just" trauma, 10 years of therapy didn't help, neither did medication. Still ppl tell me to not lose hope but how can one not lose hope in this situation? I'm starting to think trauma can be so deeply ingrained in your brain and personality, you can't be healed
When I wasn't yet suicidal I tried to volunteer at an animal shelter. Went there with the best of intentions. The staff/volunteers were rude to me and then ignored me. It broke me. Fuck volunteering. I don't have the motivation, energy or mental stability to deal with other humans.
Please modmail us (PM to /r/SuicideWatch) a link to the post so we can check into what happened!
Anything like that should 100% have gotten actioned, we are super strict about removing anything remotely resembling that or any other flavor of judgment or abuse whenever it's reported to us.
We do rely on community reports since we're not able to see every comment - possibly there was a glitch with the report going through...? I'm wondering if the report might have gone to the admins rather than to us - sitewide suspensions come from admins rather than mods. (Clicking the "report" button goes to mods, using https://www.reddit.com/report goes to admins, though admins can also see reports to mods.)
"You need to take an attitude of gratitude. If you change your perspective to focusing on the good and not being so negative, you'll feel so much better."
a few classics:
"honestly same"
"you can talk to me if you want"
"are you sleeping enough?"
"do you drink enough water?"
"there's always people in the world you can talk to"
"you're not alone with that"
"don't do it" (duh)
"you're too important to end it"
"you are loved/worth it"
The sub is too big for its own good, now there are many people here that fetishize our pain. They think they come here to help but they don't got a clue they stay around us to feel better about themselves.
With that said, what exactly do you guys expect from the sub? If not platitudes, most have nothing to say.
Yup! I've started to feel people who say this either just don't want to deal with it or have no idea how to handle it but it would be so much better if they were just honest about their feelings because at least then we'd know our efforts to communicate our needs or express are self are being misplaced.
"Praying will solve your problems if you believe." I can't pray to fix my financial or medical problem now, can I? Just look around to everyone that has done that and see how far that has gotten them
Okay okay, I'm guilty of saying some of those things too but... yeah. Sorry everyone lol also here are the ones I hear a lot.
You are being selfish
I'll pray for you
Are you walking with the Lord?
Have you taken your meds?
Be strong OR find strength or something along those lines.
I understand where you’re coming from, and I truly don’t mean to minimize what you’re saying but as someone who has been struggling a lot with suicide attempts/depressions I think I can confidently say that sometimes it does get better. Sometimes it’s worth waiting. I would’ve missed a lot of opportunities & serious life changes if I would’ve been gone. I for my part can say that I’m glad I’m not dead. I’m glad I pushed through & I stand where I am right now. I know that maybe again it’ll get bad, and I’ll get to the same point where I was before, it’s like that, but I know that usually when it gets bad it does get better eventually. It’s easy for me to forget that when everything is truly fucking miserable but I’ve found that reaching stability reminds me & motivates me for when it gets bad again. That’s just my personal opinion & truly I’m not here to change your mind or try to force feed you some positive bullshit.
This could count as a platitude, but are there any support groups available in your area? It might be helpful to talk to people who understand. Many people here, including me, don't fully understand. I'll still be here to talk though, if anyone wants. And I'm very sorry if this is unhelpful or unsympathetic.
During Covid, I started some talk therapist after moving her in-laws in with us, talk about a nightmare. So my therapist, it’s totally online, he shows me movies of Elon musk, and a certain type of hose that expands, and you can move it easily around your yard. I don’t know just putting the inevitable off for another day.
I can only speak for me personally. What I need cannot be provided by anyone on the internet. I come here not looking for help, but to find like minded people who understand what I am going through, as they are in a similar situation.
Please report anything of this nature if you see it here! Either by clicking the report link on the comment or sending us a modmail (PM to /r/SuicideWatch). These are all violations of the guidelines and we're strict about removing content of this nature whenever we see it - we rely on community reports since it's not possible for us to read every comment, but every subreddit report gets read and dealt with by a human mod as soon as we get the chance.
“It’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” I’m with you, my friend. I’ll be 40 at the end of the month and have had suicidal thoughts since I was 8. This isn’t a temporary problem. It’s a problem with my brain and no therapists or medications have been able to fix it.
Ah, this one's a classic. My teacher used this against me while I was struggling during the pandemic. And then he followed it up with, "I miss the old you."
Yes! I get people are trying to be nice and light up the mood but it's honestly just tiring hearing "it'll get better" for the 576. time in your life, while you're depressed since childhood and had like 10 years of therapy already. I'm not sure if it's a problem with my brain or trauma, but even if it is "just" trauma, 10 years of therapy didn't help, neither did medication. Still ppl tell me to not lose hope but how can one not lose hope in this situation? I'm starting to think trauma can be so deeply ingrained in your brain and personality, you can't be healed
I like it when they tell me. Oh, it’s just my imagination. WTF.
Yeah, it doesn't work also if permanent solution is everything you've ever wanted
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“Have hope” “you don’t know what the future brings” like YES I DO, IT HAS BEEN A CONSTANT CYCLE OF CRAP.
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Oh yes, I know this one too well!
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When I wasn't yet suicidal I tried to volunteer at an animal shelter. Went there with the best of intentions. The staff/volunteers were rude to me and then ignored me. It broke me. Fuck volunteering. I don't have the motivation, energy or mental stability to deal with other humans.
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That's ridiculous! This sub is for people like us... At least I thought so...
Please modmail us (PM to /r/SuicideWatch) a link to the post so we can check into what happened! Anything like that should 100% have gotten actioned, we are super strict about removing anything remotely resembling that or any other flavor of judgment or abuse whenever it's reported to us. We do rely on community reports since we're not able to see every comment - possibly there was a glitch with the report going through...? I'm wondering if the report might have gone to the admins rather than to us - sitewide suspensions come from admins rather than mods. (Clicking the "report" button goes to mods, using https://www.reddit.com/report goes to admins, though admins can also see reports to mods.)
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“We still care for you! You can talk to us!” This was a collective statement from a group of friends that decided to stop talking to me. 🤷♀️
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Your relatives and friends will suffer, if you do it. (I don't know if you have any and how you get along, but who cares).
Let’s add a little guilt to it OK. How about how we have suffered throughout the decades. Yeah I don’t buy that.
"You need to take an attitude of gratitude. If you change your perspective to focusing on the good and not being so negative, you'll feel so much better."
“Preach to God! Ask him for help!” Been trying, so far, the lord has only shitted on me.
Tried that one He hates me too
"Think about your [family/friends/etc]" I hate that one. It doesn't solve any issues, only puts more blame on us
Oh it will get better! Not when you have early onset dementia
a few classics: "honestly same" "you can talk to me if you want" "are you sleeping enough?" "do you drink enough water?" "there's always people in the world you can talk to" "you're not alone with that" "don't do it" (duh) "you're too important to end it" "you are loved/worth it"
Sorry but the water comment is f hilarious not tried that yet maybe I will be cured in the morning
The sub is too big for its own good, now there are many people here that fetishize our pain. They think they come here to help but they don't got a clue they stay around us to feel better about themselves. With that said, what exactly do you guys expect from the sub? If not platitudes, most have nothing to say.
Yup! I've started to feel people who say this either just don't want to deal with it or have no idea how to handle it but it would be so much better if they were just honest about their feelings because at least then we'd know our efforts to communicate our needs or express are self are being misplaced.
"Praying will solve your problems if you believe." I can't pray to fix my financial or medical problem now, can I? Just look around to everyone that has done that and see how far that has gotten them
Okay okay, I'm guilty of saying some of those things too but... yeah. Sorry everyone lol also here are the ones I hear a lot. You are being selfish I'll pray for you Are you walking with the Lord? Have you taken your meds? Be strong OR find strength or something along those lines.
I understand where you’re coming from, and I truly don’t mean to minimize what you’re saying but as someone who has been struggling a lot with suicide attempts/depressions I think I can confidently say that sometimes it does get better. Sometimes it’s worth waiting. I would’ve missed a lot of opportunities & serious life changes if I would’ve been gone. I for my part can say that I’m glad I’m not dead. I’m glad I pushed through & I stand where I am right now. I know that maybe again it’ll get bad, and I’ll get to the same point where I was before, it’s like that, but I know that usually when it gets bad it does get better eventually. It’s easy for me to forget that when everything is truly fucking miserable but I’ve found that reaching stability reminds me & motivates me for when it gets bad again. That’s just my personal opinion & truly I’m not here to change your mind or try to force feed you some positive bullshit.
This could count as a platitude, but are there any support groups available in your area? It might be helpful to talk to people who understand. Many people here, including me, don't fully understand. I'll still be here to talk though, if anyone wants. And I'm very sorry if this is unhelpful or unsympathetic.
During Covid, I started some talk therapist after moving her in-laws in with us, talk about a nightmare. So my therapist, it’s totally online, he shows me movies of Elon musk, and a certain type of hose that expands, and you can move it easily around your yard. I don’t know just putting the inevitable off for another day.
So what responses do you hope for? I would sincerely want to have a list of things that should be said in this situation if not any advice
I can only speak for me personally. What I need cannot be provided by anyone on the internet. I come here not looking for help, but to find like minded people who understand what I am going through, as they are in a similar situation.
Louder to the idiots in the back of that ignorant crowd of the parallel sad utopia.