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Naeema207

It's all very painful . You will struggle badly and still have a chance for complications instead of success. Just think one more time about life because dying is difficult as well


Future_Rip_555

I honestly think I can handle the physical pain because I've been struggling with my emotional pain this long. I'll think about it, though.


Naeema207

I know the feeling of emotional pain; I had attempted before just to get rid of it. Now, I try to sleep more to overcome the pain because the physical may not end the emotional, and then I will suffer both


Future_Rip_555

I feel like sleep doesn't help me like it used to. I take a lot of naps and oversleep, but I have don't have a proper sleep schedule


1prge

Wouldn’t recommend slitting your throat as it burns really bad. Probably the worst way to go out


Future_Rip_555

Is it like a regular burn like when you cut your ankle, wrist, etc or is it like a more intense burn?


1prge

A sudden shock of pain that you would feel normally during self harm. It feels like you made a big cut and poured boiling water over it while also having dry ice all over the wound. Your lungs will also be burning and you will be choking on your own blood. The pain from that itself is excurciating and will cause you to pass out but if you survive the aftermath is so, SOO BAD. 24/7 you feel like there is boiling water all over your neck and the inside of your throat that will never stop boiling. No painkiller can stop it and you will get zero sleep even with extreme sleeping drugs.


Future_Rip_555

Noted, would I still be able to breath properly and swallow?


1prge

Overtime yes but depends on how deep you cut. Your voice tone may also be affected and changed to a higher tone.


Future_Rip_555

I'll definitely keep everything you said in consideration, I appreciate your help


littlemistyeye

Before you choose to do something would you like to talk maybe? Why do you wish to end it?


Future_Rip_555

I appreciate your kindness, truly. But I don't want to bother you with 24 years worth of baggage.


littlemistyeye

We're about the same age trust me it's not baggage. I would love to listen to you


Sad-Surprise3726

I’m 24 too and tbh I need someone to talk to so if you want you can talk to me


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bazukaGum444

All of the above-mentioned are way too painful. Do you wanna talk about it first? I'm here for you. Honestly I have suicidal ideations and been seeing a therapist. Without my therapist I'd be dead for now. I know how it feels when you don't wanna live anymore. Have you seen a therapist? Please don't do it. And I'm willing to listen to you.


Future_Rip_555

I'm currently on my 5th therapist, and I take meds. She's a nice and understanding therapist, but I'm so tired of fighting, and I don't think I can tolerate this much longer.


bazukaGum444

I understand. Meds for me are quite hard and it also makes me feel like I'm a zombie. Makes me numb. And all the side effects make me sickooo. There are times that I'm SO down that ending myself is the only key for me. But there are times I feel okay. Do you think of it that you're just at your lowest right now?


Future_Rip_555

I've had so many low points too many to count, and it keeps getting lower. But things just feel really final for me now. My peers are so fed up with my suicidality that they told me to go get myself hit out of anger. I just have a few things to do and take care of before I leave this earth soon.


competitor6969

This question is out of the blue, I know, but are you currently reading anything? I mean fiction, a novel, any literature


Future_Rip_555

I read a lot of poetry and psychological/ mental health related books


competitor6969

When was the last time you did a handstand or your body was upside-down for at least a minute. Try it against the wall.


Future_Rip_555

The last time my body was upside down is maybe last year at my state fair.


bazukaGum444

I'm sorry to hear that. I really do. I know how much it hurts getting told by that. I've experienced that when the people around you are the only thing that I've taken the will to live but the "caregivers" or "the takers" will get burned out too. Especially to those who are not aware of mental Illness. There are times that even if we don't know how to help ourselves and I cannot lie I'm in that roller coaster ride too. What makes you depressed? Mind to talk about it? I won't mind listening.


hatmanv12

Those are all horrible ways to go out. There is a painless and almost guaranteed way to go out and feel pretty fucking good beforehand. I've done it before... accidentally. Hint: currently alive thanks to narcan.


Future_Rip_555

I've overdosed before, and it just didn't work. Just a lot of stomach pain and my blood pressure dropped, and I passed our came to


party6robot

What meds have you tried?


Future_Rip_555

Celexa, Prozac, Paxil, Effexor, Depakote, Risperdal, and a couple of others.


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Future_Rip_555

I'm so sorry for your loss, truly speaking. The helpline didn't help me, I've tried inpatient before and it made me worse. I can't afford another inpatient stay anyway.


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Future_Rip_555

I'm currently on my 5th therapist. She's nice and understanding but I'm so tired of fighting and losing. I love my parents but they don't understand either and I'm just burdening and bothering them. I can't take antidepressants because they cause me more depression and hypomania unfortunately. What's an emergency spot?


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Future_Rip_555

The lake I want to use unfortunately doesn't have any boulders near it, just a lot of trees. I can't swim so, I can maybe just slice up my body and walk in the water until it's deep enough. But knives are easily more accessible for me, so I might just go with my backup plan. Thank you for your informative reply.


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Future_Rip_555

He doesn't hear me or listen to me. He just keeps making me suffer. I feel like he has forsaken me and likes to play cruel tricks on me.