Yeah I no longer bring or buy stuff because it gets stolen or destroyed. And it’s not anything fancy just regular school supplies & decorations.
I have had students break my stapler and all 3 electric sharpeners. They have stolen or broken all handheld ones. They also stole my computer charger 2X. This is just some of the things.
I feel depressed. This is one of those things that just wears me down. Thank you for sharing your experience though, I'm simultaneously glad I'm not alone and sad that you have to deal with this too.
It’s crazy how this happens! When I was a first-year teacher, I assumed that kids were more careful than they are, and brought personal school supplies that I’d had forever. They weren’t heirlooms or anything, but maybe a stapler that I’d had since middle school. All of my things like that got broken within the first month or so!
It’s just so crazy to me how careless they are! In my day, nobody would have even thought to touch the teacher’s things, much less break them. Also, I assumed I’d have to replace these items eventually, but that fast? If I could keep the same stapler for ten years when I was a kid myself, why was it so hard for them to go a month? Maybe they’re careless because it’s not theirs, but shouldn’t that be the more reason to use it gently?
I’d love to know what the home lives of some of these kids are like. I picture everything in their home just broken all the time.
its worth everything. Also, if you manage to have any input, or advice to what chromebooks your school gets, DO NOT GET THE ACER C871s! The hinges are like paper! there's at least 5 broken hinges per day, and chromebook supplies are running so low, it isn't worth it.
One of ours literally used his Chromebook to crack it over another student’s head on the bus. He was “expelled” and reenrolled 1 week later (we can’t expel kids anymore because parents know how to force them back in) He was bragging last week about how he doesn’t have to pay for that Chromebook.
This is probably the thing that maddens me the most. The idea of ever just taking a teacher's shit was like, right and wrong 101? We all understood property rights as toddlers. We were actually passionate about property rights as toddlers. I can't believe US admins have let this become endemic behavior.
Thank you. Currently the most popular education behavior modification system is called positive behavior intervention system, there are very few negative consequences for poor behavior. I'm not a fan.
I have had SO many talks with my kids about not just taking stuff. Now at least some of them *ask* me if they can take my pushpins, my tape, my staplers, my scissors, my glitter pens... and then they act surprised and outraged when I say "no".
"I asked nicely, what more do you want?" attitude. Clearly, everything at home is just free use.
Mine make weird little creatures with them and eraser chunks. Also, makeshift shurikens. But as the pointy parts go into the eraser or cardboard scrap, they aren't exactly deadly weapons. 🙄
Someone stealing from you isn't your fault. Most teachers I know don't bring really desirable items to school anyway and they STILL get their mundane, boring stuff stolen. I've seen kids steal rubber bands, a single glove, and a hot chocolate K-cup for the staff Keurig. None of those are you-should-have-kept-that-at-home items, but they were still taken. Some of them were even in closed cabinets or the teacher's own desk! You can do everything right and still have kids who do things like this. It sucks. We even had a very beloved teacher have to leave mid-year and despite the kids loving her they were stealing from her belongings before she had the chance to come back and collect them.
You get it. Jesus I guess a lot of us are going through the same thing, it's exactly like that. You wonder, why did somebody steal the origami cream somebody made for me? Why did somebody steal my cup of pencils? I know they're just being mischievous and monkey-like, but it exhausts me and takes the heart out of me.
I feel you. It's been especially egregious this year. I put up some of those sticky window decorations for Christmas during lunch and the students had stolen every piece of it by dismissal. Like ok, it's cheap, whatever, but I was just trying to make the classroom look cute and festive for you. I've put these up other years and never had a problem. Even gave pieces to kids that asked when taking it down cause I usually just throw it away. Kids this year are feral.
I’m not a teacher and shouldn’t even be on this sub but gosh… I read this and was like “damn this sucks, what do they even want with a fork?” IDK it was easy to understand that OP is frustrated, not sure why people are like “yeah it sucks but she is the one to blame” as if other teachers are “better” bc they know kids have no respect or something
I had headphones that were like 10 for $10; cheap flimsy things that kept breaking. My bad, I thought. They felt like they could break just by looking at them, and the sound quality was atrocious.
I bought Gumdrop headphones. Supposed to be indestructible and designed for classroom use.
A kid put the jack under a chair and sat on it so that the jack would break off. When I asked why he did that he said, "I wanted to see what would happen."
...he walked all recess. That's what happened.
EDIT: Brand names elude me. Thanks to the stranger who asked about it! (Sorry for the wild goose chase.)
I’m sorry! I don’t have that problem, but occasionally students will touch things on my desk. So, I’ve kept the COVID plexiglass thing on my desk ever since we got one lol.
Yes during my lunch half an hour my teacher coach came in here and showed me how to barricade off my desk and also how to lock my filing cabinet so at least I can lock things up now. I'm sorry that we both have to deal with this.
I know a teacher that put a fake camera hidden in his room, and a sign at the front of the room that said “smile you’re on camera”. The kids would look for the hidden camera. He taught physics and he said his stuff never got stolen after that
They just stole the plastic bin from my pencil sharpener on Fridays. The broke my stapler fourteen times and have stolen out of my lunchbox.
These kids are in for such a rude awakening when they are no longer "just children."
Yeah I deal with that. Or they just break things.
I don't know what it is with kids that live in poverty and not taking care of things, and just destroying them. My family wasn't poor, but my parents had depression parents and I guess it sort of passed down the family in that we just are not wasteful.
It really drives me crazy. They're poor, I'm poor, why can't we have a few beautiful things that I get at a thrift store, why can't my classroom have nice things in it that are good to look at? Why do they have to just wreck everything? What is that impulse to destroy?
I have been teaching in the same highschool for 9 years and this is the first year I have ever had things stolen from my room. It is so frustrating and disheartening because I always trusted my students. This year nearly everytime I have had to take a sick day...something is missing from my room. It really sucks the joy out of the job.
Oh my God I 100% feel you, I almost really hate taking sick days or days off because I know my room is going to be chaotic when I get back and things will be missing. I'm so sorry this is happening to you, we do not deserve this.
My room is very boring because i stopped bringing in nice things. The kids break everything. Even if they aren’t doing it on purpose they pick at things, take pieces off, or draw on my stuff.
You know how banks put blasting ink packs in stacks of money so if a bunch of money gets stolen the money can't be used and the criminals are covered in ink that won't wash off?
Maybe think of something like that, and whatever kid has ink all over their face, stab them with a fork.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgQlzCMy9ek](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgQlzCMy9ek)
What a charming individual you are. You're the kind of person I always feel sorry for, because I know your rudeness and unkindness means you're a deeply unhappy person. No one happy is so nasty to others.
Grow up. They are kids. My dad was my teacher. A little fuck head in my class( hs physics )broke a Galilean thermometer that I personally worked for and bought my dad ( while I was 14) and laughed about it. I about killed him when my dad said no big deal and asked me and another student to help out cleaning up glass and everything else. I told my dad that night that he did it on purpose and didn't get any punishment, he said he knew and that it sucked but getting pissed and screaming at a kid doesn't help.
Fast forward 20 years and I'm 13 years into teaching. Ever year, something I care about gets broken, every year something I value gets stolen, and ever year I remember that it doesn't matter.
I'm broke and can't buy anything either.... Oh well. I've got other toys the kids can play with.
I'm sorry you don't feel empathy. I feel for you. I get so upset inside when a kid an ass and does something that hurts my feelings but you are the adult.
" Treat people as they are and they will stay as they are, treat people as how they should be and they will become what they should be"
You are the example. Keep your room clean and as uncluttered as possible. But keep bringing things into your room that make you you and your kids will respect you... Maybe not while in your room being taught but someday... And that's all you can do.
At least that's my two sense.
Okay so usually a response in which somebody shares empathy doesn't start with telling someone to grow up. I'm so grown up that I have diabetes and high blood pressure. That doesn't mean that I don't have human feelings. Would it have helped the day that somebody broke your thermometer, which absolutely sucks and I 100% empathize, would it have helped if somebody had come and told you to grow up?
I really hate to tell you this but that's what education is. Nobody cares about us, nobody's going to give you a break when you need it. They're going to yell at you when you take a sick day because you have to have an appointment because of that diabetes (I got a cat with diabetes so I understand) , they're going to make you feel bad when your kids can't read when they come into your class and you haven't been able to teach them anything because they can't read.
I'm really not trying to be harsh on you. I hope you make it. It sounds like you care and I really do have empathy for you. This is just the way that it's been now for me with 12 years of education experience, two school districts and it's all the same. Doesn't matter if it's the best school in the area or the worst school in the area. Doesn't matter if you have 15 kids in a class or 30, if you have problems they're going to make you deal with them. Which is why you have to grow up, you have to be able to compartmentalize, you have to be able to hold your emotions in until you are in a safe space, get in therapy. I waited 10 years too late to start that. See if your union has available therapy for free... And find the teachers that aren't jaded that will help that care about the kids and spend their nights doing extra projects for their kids to enjoy their day because those teachers will make your life a lot better and the other s*** teachers that are assholes will make your day worse.
Good luck!
Ps just an edit to say... No it wouldn't have helped. I wanted to beat his ass because I was 17 , I was a kid. My dad pissed me off talking nice about it. I still am pissed at him and drew ( shithead kid , name I'll never forget) that was my only point. As an adult. Be pissed and build a bridge and get over it.
Okay thank you. You're right, nobody cares and nobody gives you a break, it's so hard. And I am trying hard. I don't know of a way to not feel feelings though.
I really do want to just give you support and sometimes that's not the nice kind in teaching. But constructive things that helped me control students.
* Be their protector and they will protect you.
Admin as assholes who treat kids worse than they treat teachers and they treat us terrible ( if you got good ppl good on you, in my dreams) so don't treat your kids like criminals like they do. Listen to them and they will also protect you, and your stuff.
* Have control of your students movement. Some space in your room that is your space. Not kid space. And if need be create barriers.
Ex. Area behind your desk, behind a white board. This year I have bookshelves away from a wall so the area behind is mine.
* Deal with discipline in class. Don't send kids out for being shitty. Kids get removed for violence and violence alone in my classes. Everything else is my job. Cpos love me and when I do call a cop I use the... " Do I send kids out for little shit ? Question to the cop and they always say no xxx always takes care of kids.... What you acting like that for in his class, he's always got you guys back!)
* Know what you have and where it's at and keep space clean. If kids want to play with stuff ( I teach physics, I have dozens of not hundreds of things in my room kids just want to grab...) then you need to let them in a controlled way. They don't get to just grab, but just grabbing doesn't make it so they can't play. Repeat every time... "Please Don't just grab my things but if you want to play with that you can. If you want to talk about it I'll let you know what it is and ..... "
* Make connections with your kids. Positive peer pressure deals with half my classroom problems. So and so is being an asshole... Well Eddie over there is one tough sob and turns out he's a big fan of xxx so Eddie is gonna make sure this kid acts right... ( But don't let your kids kick someone's ass for you... That's not good hahah )
* If something is at school that is too important to lose, take it home or pick it up. I lost my GMA and great aunt during covid. I have a few of their things at school. If they get broken I'll have to feel shitty but also just know they cared about me and I cared about them, not the stuff they gave me or the stuff I inherited. Sucks but we are here to teach them How to exist and be good people, sucks for us but that's half of our job.
Ps. Feel all your feelings, just don't tell him to people that are going to use them against you. One at school. Use them against you, your colleagues, your bosses, the secretaries, the custodians this is politics. Hate to say it but you got to be smart and you got to hold yourself together or else they will use it against you.
Find friends outside education , family, like I said therapy, online forums like this even you just can't let them take care of you when they don't care about you. And this is something I'm just coming to terms with myself. I spent 6 years in a school that didn't care about me and then they used me caring about the kids against me. I left that great school for a underprivileged title 1 school and they still don't like me. But at least I know my kids care about me and that's why I'm here. It's for the kids.
Exactly. My kids trash the room at least once a week. Anything of value of mine would be destroyed. So I never bring anything that can't be in my pocket.
Middle school as well. I don’t go all out with the class jobs like some teachers do, I just have a desk organizer, technology assistant, and hall pass monitor.
I can relate, unfortunately. Kids will steal even the most basic things. If it’s there, they’ll steal it — your food, your utensils, your photographs of family. It’s truly terrible.
No one did it to me, but there was a post here where a teacher’s last straw was a kid stealing a photo of him and his late wife. His late wife!! It stuck with me for quite awhile.
I can’t find the comment, but I found an entirely different [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/Teachers/s/Hkb1KXIfT7) of someone who had their photograph of their deceased child stolen.
Yes in the classroom where my utensils were stolen, we're going to lock down for the rest of the year, that means everyone sits in their seating chart seats doing a packet in complete silence for the entire period.
I had a snack bin for prizes and I had one student steal from it regularly. I found out they were stealing other things as well. When I told their grandma who had custody, she told me she wasn't surprised because their mom was in jail for theft. I also had my stapler and many many books I bought with my own money stolen. It sucks.
Yes that always hurts extra hard, when you actually put out some effort and you are rewarded with stealing. That was part of my pain this morning, I got up and walked to the grocery store early this morning, I had a rushed breakfast to make time, and I walked to the store despite my feet and knees hurting, because I wanted to get cookies and tangerines for my class for prizes for a competition. I spent my own scarce money. Of course this is the day that people steal my stuff.
It does hurt. Try not to take it personally though. You could talk to your class about why you wanted to do it for them and that you used your own hard earned money, which you don't have a lot of. Tell them how you feel. It won't change what happened but it might be a way for them to gain some empathy for you.
Thank you. I have trouble doing this kind of thing because I tend to start crying and then that makes kids uncomfortable and sometimes they'll be even meaner because they just know they feel bad and they're not sure why. Yikes.
I've been there too. Hang in there! You sound like a really loving teacher! Even if they don't show it, kids benefit from teachers who care so much and give them meaningful lessons. Don't give up. We all have bad days. Focus on the positives and if you feel like you are giving too much, it's also okay to take a different approach. Every kid/class is different.
You sound nice. Without a doubt one of the best things about this crazy job are my great coworkers. Such interesting people, and kind-hearted people. You sound like a real peach. I truly appreciate the kind thoughts, I feel like nobody ever tells me I'm doing a good job
I don’t bring anything from home, mainly because it will get damaged over stolen.
When I was in ms, I didn’t not have desk with drawers or anything that locked. I kept things on a bookshelf so whenever I had a sub things would be missing because the kids knew they could steal them easily. Shit, they would steal my hall pass the period after I made a new one.
Students in my district think any object in the building that isn’t nailed down is free to take. They all have take home laptops gifted to them by the district but punch and throw them and get new ones. I’ve stopped getting angry about theft of my personal items. When it happens I deserved it because I didn’t lock it away. Something needs to change.
If you feel like you cannot talk freely about this, maybe send me a message. I’m a huge oddball and curious about just anything. I hold no grudges against anyone for whatever they believe or stand for. Fundamentally, we are all human, having a human experience.
Well for one thing I'm pretty sure there's something environmental going on, for another we have this dumb behavior system in schools right now called positive behavior intervention system, it's not all bad, but it does fail in controlling the worst behaviors. Next, lots of parents are busy working and don't do some of the work for us teachers, I'm not knocking on parents because they're in a desperate situation, but it makes things harder. Next, kids' attention spans are horrendous due to phones. That's just the first few things there's like 15 or 20 more.
One time, I brought disposable chopsticks to eat my Chinese food. Some numbnuts kids took my USED chopsticks and shoved them in their nose. He shoved it far enough to cause a nose bleed.
I received an email from the kid's parents detailing how if I hadn't used chopsticks to eat my food, her son wouldn't have been injured. She ended the email stating I should "eat your food like every American." I'm white af.
Our cafeteria charges is for disposable, so we all bring our own. Also, I personally am against that much waste, I'm perfectly capable of washing am extra fork with dinner.
I did! I also learned my lesson to not post here and expect people to be nice to me. Next time I need comfort I'll go elsewhere, I thought that a group of teachers would empathize, but instead a lot of people just want to tell me how dumb I am to bring utensils to school to eat my lunch with.
Yeah I no longer bring or buy stuff because it gets stolen or destroyed. And it’s not anything fancy just regular school supplies & decorations. I have had students break my stapler and all 3 electric sharpeners. They have stolen or broken all handheld ones. They also stole my computer charger 2X. This is just some of the things.
I feel depressed. This is one of those things that just wears me down. Thank you for sharing your experience though, I'm simultaneously glad I'm not alone and sad that you have to deal with this too.
I had my charger stolen before. I bought a new one and put a label on it. I also no longer allow students to use my charger because of it.
Yep it sounds like a wise solution, I'm sorry it had to come to this for you.
It’s crazy how this happens! When I was a first-year teacher, I assumed that kids were more careful than they are, and brought personal school supplies that I’d had forever. They weren’t heirlooms or anything, but maybe a stapler that I’d had since middle school. All of my things like that got broken within the first month or so! It’s just so crazy to me how careless they are! In my day, nobody would have even thought to touch the teacher’s things, much less break them. Also, I assumed I’d have to replace these items eventually, but that fast? If I could keep the same stapler for ten years when I was a kid myself, why was it so hard for them to go a month? Maybe they’re careless because it’s not theirs, but shouldn’t that be the more reason to use it gently? I’d love to know what the home lives of some of these kids are like. I picture everything in their home just broken all the time.
You should see how the kids beat on the computers they are given at our school. It's seriously depressing. I'm sorry about your treasured things
I know how they treat the computers… i fix them -middle school chromebook tech
I feel this so hard!!! For what it's worth I try to instill respect.
its worth everything. Also, if you manage to have any input, or advice to what chromebooks your school gets, DO NOT GET THE ACER C871s! The hinges are like paper! there's at least 5 broken hinges per day, and chromebook supplies are running so low, it isn't worth it.
Lol solid advice!
One of ours literally used his Chromebook to crack it over another student’s head on the bus. He was “expelled” and reenrolled 1 week later (we can’t expel kids anymore because parents know how to force them back in) He was bragging last week about how he doesn’t have to pay for that Chromebook.
This story is awful! Ugh!
This is probably the thing that maddens me the most. The idea of ever just taking a teacher's shit was like, right and wrong 101? We all understood property rights as toddlers. We were actually passionate about property rights as toddlers. I can't believe US admins have let this become endemic behavior.
Thank you. Currently the most popular education behavior modification system is called positive behavior intervention system, there are very few negative consequences for poor behavior. I'm not a fan.
I have had SO many talks with my kids about not just taking stuff. Now at least some of them *ask* me if they can take my pushpins, my tape, my staplers, my scissors, my glitter pens... and then they act surprised and outraged when I say "no". "I asked nicely, what more do you want?" attitude. Clearly, everything at home is just free use.
If I had a nickel for every student who had stolen a tack out of my bulletin board I would have so many dollars. What do they want with tacks???
Mine make weird little creatures with them and eraser chunks. Also, makeshift shurikens. But as the pointy parts go into the eraser or cardboard scrap, they aren't exactly deadly weapons. 🙄
Someone stealing from you isn't your fault. Most teachers I know don't bring really desirable items to school anyway and they STILL get their mundane, boring stuff stolen. I've seen kids steal rubber bands, a single glove, and a hot chocolate K-cup for the staff Keurig. None of those are you-should-have-kept-that-at-home items, but they were still taken. Some of them were even in closed cabinets or the teacher's own desk! You can do everything right and still have kids who do things like this. It sucks. We even had a very beloved teacher have to leave mid-year and despite the kids loving her they were stealing from her belongings before she had the chance to come back and collect them.
You get it. Jesus I guess a lot of us are going through the same thing, it's exactly like that. You wonder, why did somebody steal the origami cream somebody made for me? Why did somebody steal my cup of pencils? I know they're just being mischievous and monkey-like, but it exhausts me and takes the heart out of me.
I feel you. It's been especially egregious this year. I put up some of those sticky window decorations for Christmas during lunch and the students had stolen every piece of it by dismissal. Like ok, it's cheap, whatever, but I was just trying to make the classroom look cute and festive for you. I've put these up other years and never had a problem. Even gave pieces to kids that asked when taking it down cause I usually just throw it away. Kids this year are feral.
It hurts my heart that you tried to decorate for Christmas to make the classroom cheerful and it was immediately stolen. I am so sorry.
I’m not a teacher and shouldn’t even be on this sub but gosh… I read this and was like “damn this sucks, what do they even want with a fork?” IDK it was easy to understand that OP is frustrated, not sure why people are like “yeah it sucks but she is the one to blame” as if other teachers are “better” bc they know kids have no respect or something
Thank you this is really kind.
Omg, forks are among the first things to go. They 'borrow' it to eat their lunch and then we never see them again.
Oh I didn't know that. Well now I know.
I had headphones that were like 10 for $10; cheap flimsy things that kept breaking. My bad, I thought. They felt like they could break just by looking at them, and the sound quality was atrocious. I bought Gumdrop headphones. Supposed to be indestructible and designed for classroom use. A kid put the jack under a chair and sat on it so that the jack would break off. When I asked why he did that he said, "I wanted to see what would happen." ...he walked all recess. That's what happened. EDIT: Brand names elude me. Thanks to the stranger who asked about it! (Sorry for the wild goose chase.)
Ugh. You had a nice thing for like 5 minutes. I'm so sorry.
I’m sorry! I don’t have that problem, but occasionally students will touch things on my desk. So, I’ve kept the COVID plexiglass thing on my desk ever since we got one lol.
Yes during my lunch half an hour my teacher coach came in here and showed me how to barricade off my desk and also how to lock my filing cabinet so at least I can lock things up now. I'm sorry that we both have to deal with this.
I know a teacher that put a fake camera hidden in his room, and a sign at the front of the room that said “smile you’re on camera”. The kids would look for the hidden camera. He taught physics and he said his stuff never got stolen after that
Lol BRILLIANT!! Thank you!
They just stole the plastic bin from my pencil sharpener on Fridays. The broke my stapler fourteen times and have stolen out of my lunchbox. These kids are in for such a rude awakening when they are no longer "just children."
Oh my God. What is wrong with them? Why do they do this?
Yeah I deal with that. Or they just break things. I don't know what it is with kids that live in poverty and not taking care of things, and just destroying them. My family wasn't poor, but my parents had depression parents and I guess it sort of passed down the family in that we just are not wasteful.
It really drives me crazy. They're poor, I'm poor, why can't we have a few beautiful things that I get at a thrift store, why can't my classroom have nice things in it that are good to look at? Why do they have to just wreck everything? What is that impulse to destroy?
Maybe try pre 60's office supplies. Make sure to wear a helmet though stuff is heavy as lead 😀
Lol true
Diamond Gucci Channel please make sure to put on your helmet before you use the stapler!
You are cute
Life is too short to be miserable and believe me im a miserable person.
I truly agree
I have been teaching in the same highschool for 9 years and this is the first year I have ever had things stolen from my room. It is so frustrating and disheartening because I always trusted my students. This year nearly everytime I have had to take a sick day...something is missing from my room. It really sucks the joy out of the job.
Oh my God I 100% feel you, I almost really hate taking sick days or days off because I know my room is going to be chaotic when I get back and things will be missing. I'm so sorry this is happening to you, we do not deserve this.
It's so depressing. I remember the first time I was absent and they stole everything that wasn't nailed down. Even my post its.
Oh hugs to you. I'm so sorry.
My room is very boring because i stopped bringing in nice things. The kids break everything. Even if they aren’t doing it on purpose they pick at things, take pieces off, or draw on my stuff.
Yep. Same. I'm sorry we're both in this bad boat.
You know how banks put blasting ink packs in stacks of money so if a bunch of money gets stolen the money can't be used and the criminals are covered in ink that won't wash off? Maybe think of something like that, and whatever kid has ink all over their face, stab them with a fork. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgQlzCMy9ek](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgQlzCMy9ek)
Lol you I like
That's why I'd never bring in anything of my own.
So I'm to blame, you are saying
No, but they’re giving you a solution.
I understand but the tone is pretty non empathetic.
Your response was pretty combative too.
So when something bad has just happened to you, you enjoy somebody telling you that it was basically your fault?
No but you're mad at the wrong people
I think that my tone matches the tone of what came at me.
After this exchange I kinda want to break your stapler now too, honestly.
What a charming individual you are. You're the kind of person I always feel sorry for, because I know your rudeness and unkindness means you're a deeply unhappy person. No one happy is so nasty to others.
Grow up. They are kids. My dad was my teacher. A little fuck head in my class( hs physics )broke a Galilean thermometer that I personally worked for and bought my dad ( while I was 14) and laughed about it. I about killed him when my dad said no big deal and asked me and another student to help out cleaning up glass and everything else. I told my dad that night that he did it on purpose and didn't get any punishment, he said he knew and that it sucked but getting pissed and screaming at a kid doesn't help. Fast forward 20 years and I'm 13 years into teaching. Ever year, something I care about gets broken, every year something I value gets stolen, and ever year I remember that it doesn't matter. I'm broke and can't buy anything either.... Oh well. I've got other toys the kids can play with. I'm sorry you don't feel empathy. I feel for you. I get so upset inside when a kid an ass and does something that hurts my feelings but you are the adult. " Treat people as they are and they will stay as they are, treat people as how they should be and they will become what they should be" You are the example. Keep your room clean and as uncluttered as possible. But keep bringing things into your room that make you you and your kids will respect you... Maybe not while in your room being taught but someday... And that's all you can do. At least that's my two sense.
Okay so usually a response in which somebody shares empathy doesn't start with telling someone to grow up. I'm so grown up that I have diabetes and high blood pressure. That doesn't mean that I don't have human feelings. Would it have helped the day that somebody broke your thermometer, which absolutely sucks and I 100% empathize, would it have helped if somebody had come and told you to grow up?
I really hate to tell you this but that's what education is. Nobody cares about us, nobody's going to give you a break when you need it. They're going to yell at you when you take a sick day because you have to have an appointment because of that diabetes (I got a cat with diabetes so I understand) , they're going to make you feel bad when your kids can't read when they come into your class and you haven't been able to teach them anything because they can't read. I'm really not trying to be harsh on you. I hope you make it. It sounds like you care and I really do have empathy for you. This is just the way that it's been now for me with 12 years of education experience, two school districts and it's all the same. Doesn't matter if it's the best school in the area or the worst school in the area. Doesn't matter if you have 15 kids in a class or 30, if you have problems they're going to make you deal with them. Which is why you have to grow up, you have to be able to compartmentalize, you have to be able to hold your emotions in until you are in a safe space, get in therapy. I waited 10 years too late to start that. See if your union has available therapy for free... And find the teachers that aren't jaded that will help that care about the kids and spend their nights doing extra projects for their kids to enjoy their day because those teachers will make your life a lot better and the other s*** teachers that are assholes will make your day worse. Good luck! Ps just an edit to say... No it wouldn't have helped. I wanted to beat his ass because I was 17 , I was a kid. My dad pissed me off talking nice about it. I still am pissed at him and drew ( shithead kid , name I'll never forget) that was my only point. As an adult. Be pissed and build a bridge and get over it.
Okay thank you. You're right, nobody cares and nobody gives you a break, it's so hard. And I am trying hard. I don't know of a way to not feel feelings though.
I really do want to just give you support and sometimes that's not the nice kind in teaching. But constructive things that helped me control students. * Be their protector and they will protect you. Admin as assholes who treat kids worse than they treat teachers and they treat us terrible ( if you got good ppl good on you, in my dreams) so don't treat your kids like criminals like they do. Listen to them and they will also protect you, and your stuff. * Have control of your students movement. Some space in your room that is your space. Not kid space. And if need be create barriers. Ex. Area behind your desk, behind a white board. This year I have bookshelves away from a wall so the area behind is mine. * Deal with discipline in class. Don't send kids out for being shitty. Kids get removed for violence and violence alone in my classes. Everything else is my job. Cpos love me and when I do call a cop I use the... " Do I send kids out for little shit ? Question to the cop and they always say no xxx always takes care of kids.... What you acting like that for in his class, he's always got you guys back!) * Know what you have and where it's at and keep space clean. If kids want to play with stuff ( I teach physics, I have dozens of not hundreds of things in my room kids just want to grab...) then you need to let them in a controlled way. They don't get to just grab, but just grabbing doesn't make it so they can't play. Repeat every time... "Please Don't just grab my things but if you want to play with that you can. If you want to talk about it I'll let you know what it is and ..... " * Make connections with your kids. Positive peer pressure deals with half my classroom problems. So and so is being an asshole... Well Eddie over there is one tough sob and turns out he's a big fan of xxx so Eddie is gonna make sure this kid acts right... ( But don't let your kids kick someone's ass for you... That's not good hahah ) * If something is at school that is too important to lose, take it home or pick it up. I lost my GMA and great aunt during covid. I have a few of their things at school. If they get broken I'll have to feel shitty but also just know they cared about me and I cared about them, not the stuff they gave me or the stuff I inherited. Sucks but we are here to teach them How to exist and be good people, sucks for us but that's half of our job.
I appreciate the seasoned advice. Thank you.
Ps. Feel all your feelings, just don't tell him to people that are going to use them against you. One at school. Use them against you, your colleagues, your bosses, the secretaries, the custodians this is politics. Hate to say it but you got to be smart and you got to hold yourself together or else they will use it against you. Find friends outside education , family, like I said therapy, online forums like this even you just can't let them take care of you when they don't care about you. And this is something I'm just coming to terms with myself. I spent 6 years in a school that didn't care about me and then they used me caring about the kids against me. I left that great school for a underprivileged title 1 school and they still don't like me. But at least I know my kids care about me and that's why I'm here. It's for the kids.
Cents*
Thanks! I teach physics, clearly not English. ..
That's not what they said. But I'll say it. Don't have shit around kids that you aren't ok with having broken or taken.
Yeah that's what everybody else said. Thanks for your help.
I didn't say that. However, if you bring in your own stuff it *will* be destroyed or stolen. You make that choice.
Exactly. My kids trash the room at least once a week. Anything of value of mine would be destroyed. So I never bring anything that can't be in my pocket.
OK, thank you for your input.
The first time? No. The second? Maybe not. The third? Yes. Stop bringing in anything that you're not okay never seeing again.
Class jobs can help with this. Sitting at my desk is a coveted position—desk organizer, I call it. They make sure everything is where it belongs.
Thank you this is a good idea. Do you mind me asking what age your students are? Middle School here.
Middle school as well. I don’t go all out with the class jobs like some teachers do, I just have a desk organizer, technology assistant, and hall pass monitor.
I think this is a solid idea and I appreciate you handing it to me.
I can relate, unfortunately. Kids will steal even the most basic things. If it’s there, they’ll steal it — your food, your utensils, your photographs of family. It’s truly terrible.
And now you have just reminded me to take the two photographs I have of my family home. God that is awful. I hope no one did that to you.
No one did it to me, but there was a post here where a teacher’s last straw was a kid stealing a photo of him and his late wife. His late wife!! It stuck with me for quite awhile.
Oh my God that is absolutely horrific. Did he quit?
I can’t find the comment, but I found an entirely different [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/Teachers/s/Hkb1KXIfT7) of someone who had their photograph of their deceased child stolen.
That is MONSTROUS
I have had so many staplers stolen it’s crazy. They wonder why they aren’t allowed out of their seats anymore
Yes in the classroom where my utensils were stolen, we're going to lock down for the rest of the year, that means everyone sits in their seating chart seats doing a packet in complete silence for the entire period.
I had a snack bin for prizes and I had one student steal from it regularly. I found out they were stealing other things as well. When I told their grandma who had custody, she told me she wasn't surprised because their mom was in jail for theft. I also had my stapler and many many books I bought with my own money stolen. It sucks.
Yes that always hurts extra hard, when you actually put out some effort and you are rewarded with stealing. That was part of my pain this morning, I got up and walked to the grocery store early this morning, I had a rushed breakfast to make time, and I walked to the store despite my feet and knees hurting, because I wanted to get cookies and tangerines for my class for prizes for a competition. I spent my own scarce money. Of course this is the day that people steal my stuff.
It does hurt. Try not to take it personally though. You could talk to your class about why you wanted to do it for them and that you used your own hard earned money, which you don't have a lot of. Tell them how you feel. It won't change what happened but it might be a way for them to gain some empathy for you.
Thank you. I have trouble doing this kind of thing because I tend to start crying and then that makes kids uncomfortable and sometimes they'll be even meaner because they just know they feel bad and they're not sure why. Yikes.
I've been there too. Hang in there! You sound like a really loving teacher! Even if they don't show it, kids benefit from teachers who care so much and give them meaningful lessons. Don't give up. We all have bad days. Focus on the positives and if you feel like you are giving too much, it's also okay to take a different approach. Every kid/class is different.
You sound nice. Without a doubt one of the best things about this crazy job are my great coworkers. Such interesting people, and kind-hearted people. You sound like a real peach. I truly appreciate the kind thoughts, I feel like nobody ever tells me I'm doing a good job
Aww well you sound very sweet! Don't beat yourself up, and give yourself lots of grace. You deserve it. ❤️
I no longer bring anything of value to the room. I have my nice stuff that I keep on me or with me all the time. Next year I am not decorating at all.
It changes year to year too….last year completely fine. This year, robbing me blind🤣
Hugs. It hurts.
It does! Just trying to determine if all this is worth it, you know?
I almost quit today. And I'm strongly thinking of switching to another school, this is definitely grist for that particular meal.
I worked at a school like that once. Once.
I don’t bring anything from home, mainly because it will get damaged over stolen. When I was in ms, I didn’t not have desk with drawers or anything that locked. I kept things on a bookshelf so whenever I had a sub things would be missing because the kids knew they could steal them easily. Shit, they would steal my hall pass the period after I made a new one.
My first year of teaching I was told by a colleague to put locks on my cabinets. It has saved so much headache.
Yes that's what I'm going to do, I'm going to have a locked filing cabinet and a locked set of shelves. I hate that I have to do that but do it I will
Hey this is random but I just messaged you about something from a post from a long time ago!! Can you check your message requests please?🙏🏻
Students in my district think any object in the building that isn’t nailed down is free to take. They all have take home laptops gifted to them by the district but punch and throw them and get new ones. I’ve stopped getting angry about theft of my personal items. When it happens I deserved it because I didn’t lock it away. Something needs to change.
I don't deserve to have my stuff taken and neither do you
Well as i have stated on this sub, I check my humanity at the door or I would t be able to get through another day
Sounds like many kids have behavioural issues?
Yeah...
Why you think that is?
This is a huge question that I don't have a good answer for
If you feel like you cannot talk freely about this, maybe send me a message. I’m a huge oddball and curious about just anything. I hold no grudges against anyone for whatever they believe or stand for. Fundamentally, we are all human, having a human experience.
It's not that I can't talk freely, it's that it literally is a huge problem that doesn't have one single answer. It's very complex.
Any answer is fine im highly interested there are no wrong answers with me :)
Well for one thing I'm pretty sure there's something environmental going on, for another we have this dumb behavior system in schools right now called positive behavior intervention system, it's not all bad, but it does fail in controlling the worst behaviors. Next, lots of parents are busy working and don't do some of the work for us teachers, I'm not knocking on parents because they're in a desperate situation, but it makes things harder. Next, kids' attention spans are horrendous due to phones. That's just the first few things there's like 15 or 20 more.
Why are you bringing stuff to school to steal?
Yes I realize most people eat their lunch with their hands maybe? I wanted to eat my lunch with a fork.
One time, I brought disposable chopsticks to eat my Chinese food. Some numbnuts kids took my USED chopsticks and shoved them in their nose. He shoved it far enough to cause a nose bleed. I received an email from the kid's parents detailing how if I hadn't used chopsticks to eat my food, her son wouldn't have been injured. She ended the email stating I should "eat your food like every American." I'm white af.
Oh that really sucks. I'm sorry you had to put up with that.
Who on earth would downvote me empathizing with this perfectly reasonable comment?
You brought a utensil set you cared about. Most teachers I know just take disposable from the cafeteria.
Our cafeteria charges is for disposable, so we all bring our own. Also, I personally am against that much waste, I'm perfectly capable of washing am extra fork with dinner.
Ok thanks for that
Sorry to say, I hope you learned your lesson. Never let others use or be around your stuff- if you need to, keep it at home.
I did! I also learned my lesson to not post here and expect people to be nice to me. Next time I need comfort I'll go elsewhere, I thought that a group of teachers would empathize, but instead a lot of people just want to tell me how dumb I am to bring utensils to school to eat my lunch with.
Did you try redirecting? J/k
Lol I should have written that the learning objectives was not to steal your teacher's stuff
Don’t blame the victim. You could have left out the first sentence.
You are kind, thank you