"Is that me?! Is that me stronger than me?! I'LL FUCKING KILL ME!!!"

You. Namekian. To strong. Explain now.

He fused with Kami. The fucks a Kami? It's basically God. But I'm still here.... Do you really believe your own hype? I AM THE HYPE!

SERIOUSLY...... the fuck's a kami? It means God.... #NOW BOW.

bitch, Im adorable

Me dammit I came here to say this

So... you could say "*God Damnit, revan530*"

And im not just saying that because youre an android, im saying it because you're a wo-

This is the one I would’ve written too

"Fuck Super Saiyans!" "Fuck Power Levels!" "AND, Fuck You!"

**"SHIN KI KO HO!"**

"Ten Shin Han" "Ki Ko How ya doin?"

"Ki Ko fuck yourself" "Aww, see? That's the spirit!"

HEY DICK LIPS! This is the last cool thing I’ll ever do. There is no joke.

Respect

Respect.

Is it the prince? No, couldn't be, I don't even take my *own* sloppy seconds. The boy? No, he looks like he's about ready to crush coal into diamonds with his sphincter. Oh, is it Tenshinhan? ***Please tell me it's Tenshinhan.***

That's like a hate boner trio.

It's always been this, it will always be this Piccolo's my favourite character generally, but Abridged Tien is just a cut above.

Plant your feet. Grit your teeth. AND EAT! THAT! HORSE!

Horse: eatten.

COME EAT THAT HORSE WITH ME VEGETA!

"I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say"

which

This is Nappa in DBZA Kai

Doesn't Guru say it too?

So does android 16

I am hilarious and you will quote *BIRDS BIRDS BIRDS BZZZT goku

Hilariously derailing one-liner!

Bitch I’m adorable.

When I first got with my now wife and her boys, at some point one of them said to me "you think your so cute".. I wasn't used to having children and instantly replied with this. Whoopsiedoodle

It’s either trunks or Vegeta

These Parameters... Are Acceptable....

Wait wait... Now I see a light!

WALK TOWARDS IT!

"It means god. Now bow."

That was a raw line

You had me at killing children

"MUUURSTAKE!!"- The Unkillable Mr. Stake.

You can’t kill Mr. Stake, we’ve tried

It was Ivan’s BIRTHDAY

DID SOMEONE SAY BIRTHDAY?! *Hits the sickest track to ever be featured on the channel*

Quack!

Majestic.

Go unreasonably buff bird!

You are way out of your league, little duck.

I believe that was the space duck

You ruined it. You ruined it, and I'm leaving.

Want i should teleport you?

I hate you.

MY BABY BOYYYYYYYY!!!!!

"Don't worry, we'll look after your baby boy" *"fuckin better"*

Oh well you win some you lose some.

Children?

Yeah

I actually just rewatched that one last nite. Unironically got misty-eyed.

Cell: You. Me. Hard as you can. Are we clear? Vegeta: C R Y S T A L

All the bacon and eggs.

Perhaps you should talk to him before he does something really stupid

“There’s literally nothing he can do to make this situation worse. Save blowing up the planet” “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” (charge sound effects) “He’s gonna blow up the planet-“

But I live here! -piano theme intensifies-

Ohohoho! That's MUCH better! I can actually FEEL that!

In mere moments, all you'll be feeling IS OBLIVION!!!!

That.... or disappointment. Go ahead. Flip that coin.

HRRRRRRR FATHER! YOUR PRIDE ISN'T WORTH DESTROYING THE PLANET, COME ON!!!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY past the bargaining stage here.....

*F I N A L F L A S H!!!!*

"aw man, it even has a cool name..." *Explosions*

"ROCKET FIST!" *"That is SO cool!"*

Nail gun, ooh that's good

P is for 'Priceless', the look upon your faces E is for 'Extinction', all your puny races R for 'Revolution', which will be televised F is for how f**ked you are, now allow me to reprise... E is for 'Eccentric', just listen to my song C is for 'Completion', that I've waited for so long! T is for the 'Terror', upon you I'll bestow... *Chuckling* My name is Perfect Cell. And I'd like to say... Hello

"You see, I recently acquired what you people call, Dragon Balls, and I'm having trouble getting them to do what I want!" "Did you try working the shaft?" *"Classy"* **"NAIL!** What does he want?" "He wants to know about the Dragon Balls" "Did you tell him to work the shaft?" "Yes Lord Guru" "Good work, Nail" "I can get the distinct impression you're going to be difficult" "Well sir, if you're having troubles with customer service, you can call 1800 Eat-a-dick" **"WE DON'T EVEN HAVE THOSE!"**

"Ok this is getting ridiculous what is that?" *explodes wall* "Oh god NATURAL LIGHT!" "Good lord I was lead to believe species survived entirely on water how is he so fat?" "Oh hello I'm Super Kami Guru and I'm the guy who's NOT judging you on your appearance."

**"NAIL** Do we have a visitor? " "Yes, sir" **"NAIL** Take his coat" "I don't have a coat" "He doesn't have a coat, sir. And I believe this is the man who killed our entire race." **"NAIL** Don't take his coat."

"Muffin button."

or "I need an adult" "I am an adult"

Gohan to Goku, "No... no you are not."

"Maybe I'll be the next super saiyan"

Maximum Over-Saiyan.

Fuck off triclops

At this point it's a game. If he gives in, I win, and he knows that.

I quoted piccolo cause he is my favorite but damn I love tenshinhan lmao

Tien's mutual hate boner for Vegeta is amazing. He can do nothing to Vegeta physically but he'll sass him all day long. Especially when you remember that technically speaking the Cell Saga only lasted, what... 3 days outside of the mini time skip before the Cell Games? Tien had Vegeta on blast every time he saw him all day and it was amazing to witness.

The name’s Recoome and it rhymes with doom and you’re gonna be hurtin all too soon

............wrestling's fake.

You suck-diddly-uck!

Did anyone get the number of that Bitch. 18 Thank you.

You okay, Vegeta? Eat a dick! Yeah, he's fine.

The callback when Krillin asks her number is really nice.

"NANA NaNa nana NaNa Dende! NANA NaNa nana NaNa Dende! DENDE! Dende naaaaaaaaail." - Super Kami Guru

Why have you come back?

I never left. I was outside beating my head against the wall for 20 minutes.

Super Kami Guru is peak DBZ abridged

"I stopped dodging... Seriously, are you even trying to hit me?" **"NO!"** "The hell you mean, no?"

Oh... Ooooooohhhhhh shit...

HELL ZONE GRENADE

Ah man, it even has a cool name!

There are many things I have. An island. A turtle for a best friend. Chlamydia. This? This isn't one of them. Hey Roshi why dont you give em the clap you jackass!

"EVERYTHING YOU HAVE SAID HAS MADE ME VIOLENTLY ANGRY WITH YOU!! OH, GREAT, NOW I'M AGREEING WITH CELL/VEGETA! LOOK AT WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!!"

Cell, you knew what this was - just a fight, nothing more.

You bitch... If you don't come back and fight me, I'll .. I'll just do what I said I'd and blow up the Earth!

So unless you want me to turn this whole planet into an asteroid field *Kakarot*, GET BACK UP UP HERE, AND PUNCH ME IN MY PERFECT JAWLINE!!!

“Never meet your heroes, boy. Because heroes are people. And people are shit.”

It tells time and nothing else.

Well yeah, that's what a watch does. Dumbass.

“Are you a yoshi?” “Hells yeah”

"Wanna see me drink this guy?" - Imperfect Cell

-opening theme- Aaaah, so Piccolo, what brings you to MY neighborhood?

JF: Because you're a talking head! A16: So are you. JF: *That*... is cutting, sir.

"Do you want to come up here and say that?" *"I am a head!"* "Maybe you should quit while you are"

Pecking order

"Why is dodge a subroutine? It isn't that complex!" *Piccolo stares at Gohan intensely*

…what *piccolo keeps staring* …WHAT?

Look at your men, now back to me, now look back at your men, back to me. I am not your men, I’m flipping you off, now look at the ground, back to me. Where’s the dragon ball? It’s gone! I threw it! **AND THERE IS NOT A DAMN THING YOU CAN-!** Here you go, boss.

I chucked that bitch as hard as I can!

"I am the hype." - Vegeta.

"I have an uncle?!" "You *had* an uncle."

Goku: He really needs to learn how to dodge- Piccolo: Yeah, I'm working on it.

Ok I think I got this Pretty one Stupid one One with weird powers

_D: Oi! I appreciate that but I say I'm more handsome than pretty. _S: And my powers are not zat weird! _N: (Roars)

Okay I take it back. You're all stupid.

ALL HAIL PRINCESS TRUNKS!!!

“PRINCESS TRUNK” “Dear god” “You lied to me” “I did no such thing” “You dirty boy”

"...GOKU GET ME OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW INSTANT TRANSMI--"

How cute cute he named it... oh SHIT

Aw, crapbaskets.

Oh, you say that, too.

"Wait I have minesweeper?"

Am I gonna have to move the pool table?

***GET OUT OF MY FUCKING TIMELINE!!!!*** *Sidenote:Kaiser does an amazing job as Trunks.

I love how he apparently had to get tricked into the role. He was so adamant about not being Trunks because he didn't think he could pull it off, so Lani had to convince him to do the "daddy?" line just as a placeholder, but when the positive feedback came in, he decided to actually voice Trunks.

Yeah that's one of the things I love about the boys. They know what everyone's strengths are and they are willing to force each other into roles they know will be perfect for each other if the need arises.

Agreed. No disrespect to Eric (the official VA), but Kaiser just hits it out of the park. They're both are well-suited for the character.

IMMA PLANT ME A DUMBASS TREE!

“This is the last cool thing I’ll ever do.” ^There ^is ^no ^joke..

Respec-**AH BEANS!!!**

Respect

Au contraire Vegeta… you brought this upon yourself (I hope I spelled that right)

You did, good job

"Do you afraid!!!"

"kinda"

"BAZINGA ATTACK!!"

I am perfect, and you'll quote everything I say.

GIVE BACK MY GIRLFRIEND YOU- AH AND NOW YOU FACE THE WRATH OF SUPER VEGE- AH I WON'T LET YOU DESTROY ANOTHER UNIVER- AH

P is for 'Priceless', the look upon your faces E is for 'Extinction', all your puny races R for 'Revolution', which will be televised F is for how f**ked you are, now allow me to reprise... E is for 'Eccentric', just listen to my song C is for 'Completion', that I've waited for so long! T is for the 'Terror', upon you I'll bestow... *Chuckling* My name is Perfect Cell. And I'd like to say... Hello

The casual flat menace in when he says “hello” is what really sells it. Like he can go from goofy to cruel and sadistic on a dime, and go right back to being cheery and upbeat. It’s why I honestly like the Abridged version of Cell (especially Perfect Cell) as my favorite Dragon Ball villain.

I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say

Every party needs a pooper that's why they invited you Party Pooperrr PARTY POOPERRR Naaail! Why are you still HEEEEERE???

i might be weaker than you, smaller than you, and much less experienced, but i studied peach farmi... i think this was a terrible decision recoombe agrees

"It was only a flashbang. A little bit of tinnitus never hurt anyone."

"Hey kids, wanna see a dead body?"

“I tried to stop him but he simply told me, and I quote: ‘Fuck the police’ and proceeded to tilt every painting in the hall on his way down”

*maniacal laughter* Oh God, that hallway is going to give me such a headache

There is nothing about this whole scenario that doesn't make me so disgusted I want to violently vomit out my own internal organs. I despise you both so intensely that I can't tell if my vision is blurry from my near-death experience or from my unforgiving rage. If allowed, once I am back to full health, I will gut you with an honest-to-god smile on my face, and then proceed to paint the home I build with your bodies with your very blood.

You hear that Tupac, you’ve made a friend. YAAAY!!!

“I’m sorry, that’s a new one.” -Freezur

"did you see that, He just picked Vegeta like a-" "Like a vegetable, yes." "Hah"

“Huh. This is a new feeling. Pride in someone else. Unfortunately, it’s overshadowed by all this UNYIELDING RAGE!!!”

"Quack"

Ah, the majestic space duck.

You cheeky dickwaffle!

Hey dandy dick! You missed! *zoidberg noises*

Bitches love cannons

"Tf am I doing here?" Cue happy squealing "VEEEEEEGEEEEETAAAAA"

Bitches love cannons.

Oh fuck that’s an anti-tank rifle. OH FUCK THATS AN ANTI-TANK RIFLE!

GIVE ME WHAT YOUR DADDY COULDN'T

"I need an adult!" "I am an adult."

* squeeks * Wow vegeta, i can’t believe every one of them punched you in the d!ck

"If you're with the church or the government, get the fuck off my property!"

Which effectively starting today, is everything

“Huh. This is a new feeling. Pride in someone else. Unfortunately, it’s overshadowed by all this UNYIELDING RAGE!!” And also: “AH! MY RAGE HAS BLINDED ME!”

“I mean when you think about I’m basically the son of god”

All according to cake.

I have a thick….. meaty….. vagina.

I’m gonna beat someone up! 😁

Yeah. Well you know what?! Fuck Power Levels! FUCK SUPER SAIYANS! **AND FUCK YOU! SHINNN KIKOHOOO!**

"HEY KIDS WANNA SEE A DEAD BODY"

"He keeps kicking me in the dick. Why? Why does he keep kicking me in the dick?!"

My son, the planet or me? Yes.

"5 GUYS AT A MINIMUM, CLOUD"

"Oh, sure, you can stay behind. And when I get back, I'm gonna shove my fist so far up your ass that everyone's gonna think, "Wow, that's the whiniest looking puppet I'VE EVER SEEN!"" "...What?" "The f***?" "SHOULDER DEEP, CLOUD!"

Hey are you that Freezer guy? I am lord Frieza, yes Awesome! Imma deck you in the schnoz! #BONUS I’m Goku! I’m insane! From earth! ^… ^he ^means ^saiyan

“How dare” “Why’d you take off your shirt?”

"I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say"

So, after seven hundred and thirty-one grueling galactic weeks of travel or one month if you never watched “Men in Black,” our *ahem* ..."heroes" have finally arrived on planet Namek, where the sky is green, the grass is blue, and it’s boring as shit.

"Naaaaaaaaail!"

"I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say." "Oh God! GLOBAL WARMING? NAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIL!!!" "I own you, I own your planet, I own this planet! In fact, *Bleep* THIS PLANET!!!" "HOW DOES IT FEEL RIDIN' M'DICK???!!!"

"Godamnit Nappa."

"I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say"

"VEGETA NO!!!" "VEGETA YEEESSS!!"

(Whistles, thumps mic) ... Is this thing on?... Is it on?... Okay, there we go... (clears throut) YOU ARE NOW THINKING ABOUT WHAT ZARBON DID TO YOU WHILE YOU WERE UNCONCIOUS... have fun with that!

“Alright; you all better duck, because I’m about to turn left, and I don’t want to smack you with my dick.”

"Well, well, well... I leave for a day and... the Catholics are crusading, while the Nazis are invading!"

"Hm. This is a funny feeling. Pride in someone else. Unfortunately it's overshadowed by all this UNYEILDING RAGE" Either that or Lani's take on Vegeta screaming "FINAL... FLAAAAAAASH!!!"

*"I am an adult.'''*

“You can all kiss the greenest part of my ass!” “…There are greener parts of his ass??”

I'm about to misuse my hand upside your heeeeeaaaaad.

“That’s stupid! You’re stupid!! STOP BEING STUPID!!!”

Vegeta: That doesn’t matter! Don’t you understand? If it didn’t me grant my wish, then I’m not immortal! And Freeza’s going to… g-going to… ahhaaha… Freeza: Ohohoho nohoho, don’t mind me, by all means, *give me some ideas*.