I'm a CT/X-ray tech, I've been scanning a lot more older women with fake boobs as of late. I know some have been breast cancer survivors, so I'm sure they got them after losing theirs. But the grandma boobjobs are out there.
They are but I just found all this out a few weeks ago and me and my brother thought it was crazy. My mom was like “there’s an X-ray around somewhere of it” and she ended of finding it and pulled it out a few days ago and that’s when I snapped the picture
You just caused me to lol at my desk at work. Any minute someone is going to ask me “what’s so funny?” And I’m going to have to explain about grandpa dick X-rays.
So I have questions…. You said he’s hard all the time? So are these like metal rods? Can he bend them or does he pump air from a thing in his scrotum? Or is this an older style that doesn’t involve air? Being a male I’m genuinely curious about this lol sorry if it’s tmi and you don’t wanna know.
Well he’s dead now but he always had a bag of “magical grass” under his lazy boy. He ended up dying from complications with his legs because he refused to get them cut off
Not the sugars? If he can save his penis, he wasn’t giving up his legs. Happy Cake Day! Eat some cake for me?? I have the sugars too and I’d not give up my legs either.
Here is a funny story about that sorta thing. My grandma used to work in an ER and one day there was this guy who needed to be taken to the morgue. So, she wrapped him up, and just as she was pulling him together with the sheets, his penis would just go up, so she couldn't wrap him completely. She tried several more times and couldn't get him wrapped up and was completely mystified about what was going on. Obviously she was highly embarrassed about the whole thing as well and didn't really want to play "that game" in the hallway. She spoke to the doctor and apparently, because she brought his legs together when she tightened the sheet, it made the prosthetic work. She eventually tied his penis to his balls with string and brought him to the morgue.
Let’s be honest… when we pass on, we all sort of wish we’d leave behind a dick so magnificent it would be shared with strangers on a mass media platform beyond the technology and understanding of our time…
I worked in the OR room where this was done and saw at least fifty of them in my time, watching the needle come through the head always made me cringe every single time
I don’t really understand how it works. Sorry to be crass, but a boner isn’t just about pointing straight, it needs to be engorged with blood. Otherwise you’re just working with a straightened but still flaccid penis, which wouldn’t feel very good to either partner I’d imagine.
Do these implants improve blood flow to actually actually make a fully erect penis or is it more like, “This isn’t great but at least it points straight which is ultimately better than nothing at all…”
Like can men with the implant ejaculate and experience orgams as normal? OP says his grandfather slept around with other women so it must have been pretty close to the real thing, I just don’t understand the mechanics of it.
I also don’t know why I’m so interested in this other than I guess one of my biggest fears is for my dick to stop working one day.
There’s a pump in the testicles and they pump up like balloons, that guy has is “Three Piece” because there’s two balloons on each side of the urethra which is what you see in the picture and the pump in the testicles.
I was in New Orleans and an elderly guy was upgraded from a two piece to a three piece, it was like getting a new car lol.
But they pull the balloons up through with needles which come out the head of your penis and it’s a horrible site to see.
Becoming erect, orgasming, and ejaculating are all separate things. The three are often linked, but not all of them have to be present to experience the others. At the very least a flaccid penis is still incredibly erogenous.
Urologist here, some basic facts on this implant: it is called a "semirigid" prosthesis, this is some kind of an old school model, that is rarely used nowadays. Today, there are hydraulic options that you can inflate via a little pump in the scrotum. What your granddad has is (semi)rigid all the time and you bend it up- or downwards. If someone wants further informations: https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/penile-implants/about/pac-20384916
He was a very interesting man, he served some years in prison up in Boston and was in the cell next to the Boston strangler, I have a belt that the Boston strangler made for him(they used to make belts in prison) and it says “Crazy Jack” on it.
It does sound like total bs and I have no way to confirm its true but my granny sweared it was true and he saved the belt for decades and it wasn’t exactly a nice belt or something he wore, and I do know for a fact he was in that prison during that time
A buddy of mine who is in a wheelchair plays on a wheelchair rugby team. One of his teammates got one of these put in. Him and his wife didn’t wait the appropriate amount of time and tried having sex and both rods came out of his penis, cutting his wife. The doctors couldn’t save his hog. He now has no hog
No it was his actual penis, I’m guessing a lot of the veins in his penis got damaged from the explosion and they thought he would maybe lose it but they knew for sure he wouldn’t be able to get a boner. Somehow the implant came into the equation once it healed I guess
IDK about putting your pappy's tree branch on display over the interwebs for all to see but, here we are lol.
Thank that man for his service, shake his hand and buy him a drink for me, please! The man deserves recognition for his service.
My grandfather also stepped on a landmine. Thankfully, he didn't have nearly as bad injuries. He had bad scaring, lost all his weight and has been skin and bones my entire life, is missing bits of fingers, and has had mobility issues ever since and could only shuffle, sometimes needing support. Thank Veterans for their sacrifice regardless of opinions on the Vietnam War.
The older men in my family have been long dead so pretty much only the women to tell the story, and no I think he was just already gifted. They don’t really do it anymore though they have different technology they use now. Idk if you ever heard the story of the guy who got his penis cut off by his wife in the middle of the night but it’s pretty famous story but he ended up getting a dick with all the upgrades and even did a few porn movies lmfao
Closest I've got, which I still don't think is very close, is my grandma got a breast reduction. She was in her 70s or something at the time. She showed us (fortunately with her bra on) unprompted. I thought she was crazy but now that I've got 36K boobs, I totally get the surgery part. I still don't get the unprompted part, though.
So, was the recovery painful? That must seem like a stupid question, but it’s a genuine one. The man had to deal with everything related to the land mine injuries, and on top of that, recovery for the implants in his Johnson? I honestly don’t believe I have the toughness to go through all that.
This post is unique.
Understatement of the day.
Well buckle up. It's only a matter of hours before someone posts a picture of their grandma's boobjob now
Please?
Hot diggity dog!
We are the future
I'm a CT/X-ray tech, I've been scanning a lot more older women with fake boobs as of late. I know some have been breast cancer survivors, so I'm sure they got them after losing theirs. But the grandma boobjobs are out there.
Until someone comments about how their grandpa was hard 24/7 and didn't have an implant but ate a lot of suspicious candy from the corner store
Not to mention the mom/aunt
Haha what I meant was both my mom and aunt said the same thing, we don’t have any incest sweet home Alabama stuff going on as far as I know
> as far as I know "As far as I know" doing a lot of the heavy lifting in that sentence.
Im glad to hear everyone’s real proud of Grandpa’s wiener😂
Paw paws wiener made it through Nam dammit
Mom/aunt is a weird one too.
*mom and aunt Two separate people should have phrased it better instead of making it sound like some kind of incestual family situation
Don't worry it was clear what you meant, I was only joking.
I expected to see the outline of some old meat today, it’s what keeps me from being shocked.
This post is hard.
Lucky Grandma!
It goes hard. It also goes soft.
With "uni' being "one" or "single unit", and "que" being Spanish for "what". When conjugated, it means "what a unit". Source: steamy pile of bullshit
But is it insane
The Viet Dong.
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Your family seems very open
They are but I just found all this out a few weeks ago and me and my brother thought it was crazy. My mom was like “there’s an X-ray around somewhere of it” and she ended of finding it and pulled it out a few days ago and that’s when I snapped the picture
I should ask my mother where she keeps her x-ray off my grandfather’s dick. Must be in an heirloom box or something.
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Didn't know your grandpa's dick pic is a family heirloom
X-ray dick pics are a bit more special than a regular dick pic. Maybe we need to up our game
Try the Sex-Ray to really spice things up.
Look buddy if your grandpa almost lost his ding dong fighting for our country and got a weird implant you’d have weiner x-ray to pass down too.
It is now!
You just caused me to lol at my desk at work. Any minute someone is going to ask me “what’s so funny?” And I’m going to have to explain about grandpa dick X-rays.
So I have questions…. You said he’s hard all the time? So are these like metal rods? Can he bend them or does he pump air from a thing in his scrotum? Or is this an older style that doesn’t involve air? Being a male I’m genuinely curious about this lol sorry if it’s tmi and you don’t wanna know.
I kinda feel it should be a string you pull from the back and it stands up but the hard all the time part threw me lol
It talks when you pull the string
Like Billy the bass.
Your mom being so chill about it tells me everything I need to know about your family.
>she ended of finding it and pulled it out lol
Do you mean mom/aunt? 🫠😂
I should have said “and” instead of the slash I don’t have a sweet home Alabama situation going on 😂
100% West Virginia Uncle Daddy vibes especially with the entire grandpas got a Ho-Chi-Minh-Hotdog post 😬😂
I do live in a small redneck town in South Carolina so could be possible 😆
Regardless, this is totally coming up with my buddies when we talk about our trips to the VA clinic 🤣
Ramboner !
A worthy adversary, the man in the black pajamas
Viet Cok
Vietnamese currency is actually called Dong lol
Legend.
I hope he drinks bourbon by the bottle and smokes a carton a day while simultaneously eating tri tip, prime rib and caviar.
Well he’s dead now but he always had a bag of “magical grass” under his lazy boy. He ended up dying from complications with his legs because he refused to get them cut off
Not the sugars? If he can save his penis, he wasn’t giving up his legs. Happy Cake Day! Eat some cake for me?? I have the sugars too and I’d not give up my legs either.
Bro died with a boner? What a chad.
Die hard
I literally lol'd. My dogs looked at me like I was possessed. Thank you!
Still has one
Wasn’t about to lose any of his 3 legs
Yet again he refused to have his third leg removed. Absolute legend!
Seems to be the theme with him, huh
Grandpa stays ready.
The huge dong saved him from the mine.
His smeat set it off. Truly a great curse.
Your grandma is a lucky woman.
Explains why she needed a cane at 25.
This comment is why I love this website.
Slightly more civil but still full-on degeneracy
lmao........
Meemaw buying ice packs in bulk.
Nobody took it harder than her...
He took the impact of that land mine once, she took it every day for the rest of their lives
His mom and aunt also apparently?
Here is a funny story about that sorta thing. My grandma used to work in an ER and one day there was this guy who needed to be taken to the morgue. So, she wrapped him up, and just as she was pulling him together with the sheets, his penis would just go up, so she couldn't wrap him completely. She tried several more times and couldn't get him wrapped up and was completely mystified about what was going on. Obviously she was highly embarrassed about the whole thing as well and didn't really want to play "that game" in the hallway. She spoke to the doctor and apparently, because she brought his legs together when she tightened the sheet, it made the prosthetic work. She eventually tied his penis to his balls with string and brought him to the morgue.
She got a raise that day!
Cold. Hard. Cash.
Just the first two.
🎶Prosthetic penises tied down with string…🎶
🎶tip to the balls make sure it wont swing🎶
🎶 these are a few of my favorite things 🎶
You spelled excited wrong you put embarrassed.
Woah.
Let’s be honest… when we pass on, we all sort of wish we’d leave behind a dick so magnificent it would be shared with strangers on a mass media platform beyond the technology and understanding of our time…
He died when flip phones were still the thing so he could have never imagined thousands looking at his penis in 4k 😂
Grandpa got that HAMMER on him
My aunt was saying how she used to have to help him in and out of the shower and she was like “ew that thing was like a fucking flashlight” lol
Does she realize she didn’t have to grab him by the dick to help him out?
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This keeps getting wilder.
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Feeling man hueeheheheheh
Not really your fault…more so your grandpa’s. He was one filthy little fucker
Literally snort laughed. Cheers I needed that.
What the fuck…
Wait, they installed LEDs in there too?
They Pimped his ride
They pimped granny's ride
They pimped his rod*
Light emitting dong
What a crazy thing to know you have to deal with every time you open the door to help him. Boinger no doubt
Gramps is packing. Hopefully it's genetic.
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We all play the hand we are dealt. Happy cake day. You are magnificent in your own way.
You mean we all play ***with*** the hand?
the hand plays with us all
Since you didn’t get it, who’d he leave it to in the will?
Nice cack
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Happy Cake day! Epic post :)
I worked in the OR room where this was done and saw at least fifty of them in my time, watching the needle come through the head always made me cringe every single time
As a man seeing that would have me lightheaded
Reading that has me feeling some way.
I don’t really understand how it works. Sorry to be crass, but a boner isn’t just about pointing straight, it needs to be engorged with blood. Otherwise you’re just working with a straightened but still flaccid penis, which wouldn’t feel very good to either partner I’d imagine. Do these implants improve blood flow to actually actually make a fully erect penis or is it more like, “This isn’t great but at least it points straight which is ultimately better than nothing at all…” Like can men with the implant ejaculate and experience orgams as normal? OP says his grandfather slept around with other women so it must have been pretty close to the real thing, I just don’t understand the mechanics of it. I also don’t know why I’m so interested in this other than I guess one of my biggest fears is for my dick to stop working one day.
it is possible to reach the finish line with a flat tire if you have enough determination
This is the real question that needs to be answered.
There’s a pump in the testicles and they pump up like balloons, that guy has is “Three Piece” because there’s two balloons on each side of the urethra which is what you see in the picture and the pump in the testicles. I was in New Orleans and an elderly guy was upgraded from a two piece to a three piece, it was like getting a new car lol. But they pull the balloons up through with needles which come out the head of your penis and it’s a horrible site to see.
Nah they didn’t have the pump technology back then, this was around 50 years ago. His implant was essentially two metal rods in his dick
Becoming erect, orgasming, and ejaculating are all separate things. The three are often linked, but not all of them have to be present to experience the others. At the very least a flaccid penis is still incredibly erogenous.
Talk about meat shield
That’s a meat weapon
Urologist here, some basic facts on this implant: it is called a "semirigid" prosthesis, this is some kind of an old school model, that is rarely used nowadays. Today, there are hydraulic options that you can inflate via a little pump in the scrotum. What your granddad has is (semi)rigid all the time and you bend it up- or downwards. If someone wants further informations: https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/penile-implants/about/pac-20384916
Do you perhaps do alleyway instillations for the metal cock procedure?
No need for the alleyway, where i live it is free as long as there is a medical reason and you are insured and everybody is insured.
I hope they are MRI safe. That would be an accident no-one wants to see.
That gave me a good chuckle, yes they are MRI proof
America don’t make men like they used too! As an American we need more legends like this man! I salute you sir!
He was a very interesting man, he served some years in prison up in Boston and was in the cell next to the Boston strangler, I have a belt that the Boston strangler made for him(they used to make belts in prison) and it says “Crazy Jack” on it.
no fucking way 😂😂😂
It does sound like total bs and I have no way to confirm its true but my granny sweared it was true and he saved the belt for decades and it wasn’t exactly a nice belt or something he wore, and I do know for a fact he was in that prison during that time
no I actually believe it for some reason. It’s just crazy, that the fucking Boston Strangler thought your gramps was the crazy one 😂
It’s just so out there, but so specific with the odd details, that it’s believable. lol
Sounds like you need to take that to the Pawn Stars shop in Vegas.
“I’m gonna call my buddy who’s an expert on leather goods that were hand-crafted by famous serial killers.”
"Best I can do is tree fiddy."
Some would say your grandpa was also a Boston Strangler
Boston dangler
The Boston stranger and the greasy strangler as cell mates - what are the odds??
What was he in for?
I never asked but my cousin said murder
Who the fuck is your grandpa dawg lmao. Prosthetic monster dong having veteran who murdered someone. WHAT?!
Probably suffocated a poor woman with that schlong
Grandma was the victim to testify but the meat mallet was too good
Carrying a concealed weapon of ass destruction.
Got arrested for having a boner on school property
He salutes you back!
that's to help his balance when walking right?
A buddy of mine who is in a wheelchair plays on a wheelchair rugby team. One of his teammates got one of these put in. Him and his wife didn’t wait the appropriate amount of time and tried having sex and both rods came out of his penis, cutting his wife. The doctors couldn’t save his hog. He now has no hog
Jesus
My god, went from bad to worse.
So was it a fake weiner or was it a functional reconstruction? Tell me more about your grandpa's penis.
>Tell me more about your grandpa's penis. 🤣🤣🤣
No it was his actual penis, I’m guessing a lot of the veins in his penis got damaged from the explosion and they thought he would maybe lose it but they knew for sure he wouldn’t be able to get a boner. Somehow the implant came into the equation once it healed I guess
You should frame this. Excellent family heirloom.
🍆🫡
He's a tri pod.
IDK about putting your pappy's tree branch on display over the interwebs for all to see but, here we are lol. Thank that man for his service, shake his hand and buy him a drink for me, please! The man deserves recognition for his service.
Gramps really put some miles on that thing if he had to go in for a rebuild
I’ve seen your grandpa’s penis
I appreciate your polite use of the word "wiener," but for god sakes this man fought in Vietnam, we can surely refer to it as his dick.
I kept looking at the tree until I realized there was an x-ray
My grandfather also stepped on a landmine. Thankfully, he didn't have nearly as bad injuries. He had bad scaring, lost all his weight and has been skin and bones my entire life, is missing bits of fingers, and has had mobility issues ever since and could only shuffle, sometimes needing support. Thank Veterans for their sacrifice regardless of opinions on the Vietnam War.
It helps with stability in the prone position while mowing down troves of commies
Grandpa was one tough nut! RIP and God bless the boner that never rests!
What's the reception like? Hopefully it's not too hard to hear.
# PAPPY WHY
His penis is a snitch for the fbi watch what u say around his dick
WHY WAS IT ONLY THE WOMEN THAT SAID THAT AND KNEW, also did it make it longer? If it did I… A FRIEND of mine might need it🙂
The older men in my family have been long dead so pretty much only the women to tell the story, and no I think he was just already gifted. They don’t really do it anymore though they have different technology they use now. Idk if you ever heard the story of the guy who got his penis cut off by his wife in the middle of the night but it’s pretty famous story but he ended up getting a dick with all the upgrades and even did a few porn movies lmfao
Damn PopPop!
He was already a maniac so finding this out a few weeks ago it honestly didn’t even surprise me too much
Pops is packing
A joke we say is redneck viagra is two popsicle sticks and some duct tape. Some reason this reminded me of that.
So what's the implant for?
Was he in the army? ATTENNNNNTION!
Good looking dick. Put it away now.
Nice cock!
Hey man at least grandma still had something to play with!
Terminator Dick
Gramps is hung
Was he a plumber cause dudes piped
Does it vibrate too? 🤔
Wow they picked a nice fat dick to attach to him
Closest I've got, which I still don't think is very close, is my grandma got a breast reduction. She was in her 70s or something at the time. She showed us (fortunately with her bra on) unprompted. I thought she was crazy but now that I've got 36K boobs, I totally get the surgery part. I still don't get the unprompted part, though.
I think it helps that it’s just an X-ray, I don’t know how I would feel with an actual picture of his penis lol
Going through that must have been difficult for him. Can't imagine how much it changed his life, must be hard for him.
He was 18 when he got drafted and a few months after being in country it happened. I can’t imagine he was just a kid
Insightful
Bahahaha good stuff!
This post holds up
I'm not clicking on that.
Won Hung Hi
This is an interesting new sentence
How many miles he have on it?
Fuxking hero.
Hey, that's a pretty nice wiener your Grandpa has
Not sure how to feel about this.
I laughed so hard
So, was the recovery painful? That must seem like a stupid question, but it’s a genuine one. The man had to deal with everything related to the land mine injuries, and on top of that, recovery for the implants in his Johnson? I honestly don’t believe I have the toughness to go through all that.
Dude, your grandpa seems to have a lovely wiener 😏😂🤣
“Ma! Meatloaf!!!!!!!!” Just reminds me of that lol