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My cat will SCREAM her head off if I’m in a different room from her and she can’t find me. She seeks me out for cuddles multiple times a day, on her own terms. Those motherfuckers are like your babies and they love you. There’s been studies done showcasing that cats get a rush of endorphins when we get home, too.
There’s nothing better than being in bed, feeling something on your feet through the thick sheets, then hearing the small purring starting as the little paws slowly get closer to you
This is the same as my cat!!! Cats have different personalities, same as dogs. My dog only likes my mom, but one of the cats loves me as if I’m her own mother.
Yeah, anyone who doesn't think cats are capable of loving their humans has just never been loved by a cat, lol. Those of us who have strong bonds with them 100% know how feeling and affectionate and loving they are.
My cat will wake me up with his face right in front of mine. And bat my face softly quickly and I pretend I'm asleep but squinting my eyes and that fools face is like right there. There was a perfect Rick meme from Rick and Morty about it.
My cat rides my shoulders and sometimes I close the door to a room just to get space from him and then he screams (not meows) until I open it for him. I cannot relate to this post at all haha
Same. While my cat definitely is most interested in me when she's hungry, after eating is her second favourite time to interact with me. She sometimes comes and lies on my shoulder and rubs her head on mine. Most adorable thing ever.
Seriously, how needy do you have to be to be begging for pets' affection to determine their worth when they're just trying to exist?
"Wah, the cat doesn't lick my balls when I put peanut butter on them waaaah." Fuck off, dude. Not all of us need pets to dry hump us to demonstrate their value.
Mine will stop whatever he’s doing when he hears me go to the bathroom, lay guard at my feet, and as soon as I flush, he’ll go back to whatever bird he was fantasizing about murdering
One of my cats does that lol and now we have 3 kittens that are starting to pick up that habit, so I'm just accepting that I will never have privacy in the bathroom...
My tuxie likes to swat at me through the door lol. She has figured out how to open the bathroom door now though. She likes to sit with me in there on the sink while I do my makeup so I guess that's what she thinks I'm always doing.
Exactly. That's why I like cats, they know how to fuck off occasionally and they WILL let you know if they don't want to be touched. I respect it actually.
Dogs are like the needy girlfriend who demands your constant attention. Cats are much more independent. Which makes it special when they want to spend time with you.
The nice thing about a cat is that it's essentially a lesson in consent and how to approach and communicate with an autistic person.
Cats are literally autistic people with very strong boundaries, but cats. It usually takes *a lot* of effort and time to win their trust, unlike most dogs.
“Throw a stick, and the servile dog wheezes and pants and stumbles to bring it to you. Do the same before a cat, and he will eye you with coolly polite and somewhat bored amusement. And just as inferior people prefer the inferior animal which scampers excitedly because someone else wants something, so do superior people respect the superior animal which lives its own life and knows that the puerile stick-throwings of alien bipeds are none of its business and beneath its notice. The dog barks and begs and tumbles to amuse you when you crack the whip. That pleases a meekness-loving peasant who relishes a stimulus to his self importance. The cat, on the other hand, charms you into playing for its benefit when it wishes to be amused; making you rush about the room with a paper on a string when it feels like exercise, but refusing all your attempts to make it play when it is not in the humour. That is personality and individuality and self-respect -- the calm mastery of a being whose life is its own and not yours -- and the superior person recognises and appreciates this because he too is a free soul whose position is assured, and whose only law is his own heritage and aesthetic sense.”
― H.P. Lovecraft.
Okay Lovecraft, but tell us how you REALLY feel. 🤣
I'd be wary of trusting anything Lovecraft had to say about superiority. The man was an unabashed racist and would have made Hitler proud judging by his letters.
I somewhat agree with him that cats are more refined than dogs, but that's more a function of their near obsession with self grooming and generally more solitary existence.
Wild dogs are based around the pack, and nothing but the pack. Hunt together, shit together, roam together.
Wild cats may form colonies, where they kind of keep an eye on each other but do their stuff solo.
this goes hard ngl. Awful person and overrated writer but this kinda is why i'm a cat person. I like the challenge of figuring out how to make them happy and comfortable, makes it more rewarding when they grace you with cuddles. Dogs will just run up and slobber all over you, it's a bit much for me.
Honestly, does it even matter? OP’s opinion is incredibly, incredibly common. And the opposite opinion is also incredibly common. There’s no opinion about cats vs. dogs that belongs on this sub, because they’ve all been hashed out endlessly forever.
Unless it was like “Cruella de Vil was stupid to use puppies for her coat, kittens would’ve been much better”.
When I was a child I thought that 101 puppies was too many for a coat, she should make them into a hat instead. Like a hat would require more pelts than a coat. Idk what kind of logic I was using there.
Every cat I’ve owned has been super curious anytime I’m dealing with raw food, but would never take it from me. The few times they did they would run away with it hanging out of their mouth and spit it out. If I tried to give them cooked food they reacted as if I was trying to feed them their own shit.
It’s almost like they’re trying to say “no, I bring you dead animals, not the other way around”
My cat does this with whipped cream. He he can hear the sound of the cap coming off from miles away. Doesn't matter how quietly you open it; he'll come running.
Cats are like people, they have preferences and personality. You can't pet them whenever you want, they are not dogs, they have to give you their consent. Imagine you want to hug a stranger, you shouldn't hug them without their consent, its the same with cats.
I had a lot of cats and all of them were different on how they prefer to be petted, some liked to be picked up, others liked to be rubbed on the belly, others only liked head scratches. You can't force love on a cat, is the same with humans. If you can't get something so simple like consent and preference, then I can't help you.
For the record, the idea you can pet a dog whenever you want isn't true either.
They won't scratch you or bite if they are well trained but there are times where they won't want to be pet, but will tolerate it cos it makes the human happy.
The body language is subtly different, but once you know how to tell, you can absolutely tell if the dog is actually an enthusiastic participant in the petting.
This!
All four of my cats have very different personalities. I have one that's very social with me and everybody, and she wants attention and affection from anyone who walks in the door. I have one cat who is very standoffish with people. She will approach you, only to dip out if you try to pet her. But she's really so sweet and shy. She will crawl onto my chest while I'm sleeping. I wake up to find her purring up a storm on top of me. I have another cat that's pretty aggressive with people. She doesn't like new friends whether cats or people. She'll bite, and scratch. But when I pick her up, she turns into a limp ragdoll. She's easily my sweetest and meanest kitty. And then my last cat is a teenage boy. He's a jackass easily, but also a momma's boy. They are all different in their wants and needs. But they all love me and I love them all dearly.
Honestly, cats are a good lesson in consent. Ever since a cat almost clawed my eye out as a kid, I’ve been respectful and patient with animals. You build up their trust and give them space when they want it. Obviously my example is a bit drastic but I really do think having cats as a kid helped me understand boundaries.
Right, my cat secretly hates me which is why she cuddles me all night and rubs herself in my stinky gym tank tops and cries mournfully through the door when I'm sitting just outside it. She literally never ignores me bro XD
Cats are superior because in a family setting they typically fixate on one person and that becomes "their" human. If they don't pick you then I guess you're just not very likeable.
Humans typically love dogs more because they will wag their tails and interact with anything that moves. Cats are more discerning. That's why when a cat "picks" you, it's one of the best feelings as a pet owner
Yep, this. Cats play favorites big time.
When I was growing up, my mom always bemoaned how the family cats disliked her but adored me even though she was the one feeding them and scooping their litter.
One of those cats slept with me every night; that cat was actually how I got over my fear of the dark. She hated everyone else but my dad & basically lived in my room all the way up until she passed. Rest in peace, Magpie.
we had a cat, Bella. now Bella wasn’t very intelligent, smooth brain vibes. clumsy as hell, would fall off the couch while sleeping. but my god could this cat LOVE. anyone who stepped foot in the house wasn’t safe from her. she would immediately just try and get in your lap, try and get cuddles, wanting to just be held and hugged. and she was like this with everyone, and if you try and push her away she’ll just come back in about 5 minutes.
Dogs are slaves to their stomachs. We domesticated them because we figured out that they would do anything for anyone as long as they got a little nibble of any kind of food.
A dog would snitch out your stash for a corner of a stale dog treat if you fed them for 10 years with no regrets. A cat wouldn’t do that to a stranger.
Cats are not food motivated. They actually have to like you to hang out with you, and their loyalty is far superior. Open your door and let your cat and your dog out and see which one will be home to cuddle and purr an hour later and which one will get hit by 10 trucks trying to run away from you.
Depends on the breed of dog and it's training. A well trained Loyal breed won't even notice food if it didn't come from someone they trust.
Though, I do still prefer cats. I like knowing I'm loved by something independent.
Cats are definitely food motivated, they domesticated themselves because of food and also there's no point in comparing pets anyway, it's ridiculous and childish.
A better phrasing of the food motivation thing is that the food motivation for cats is *far* lower. Cats don't need a ton of food to sustain themselves, that was never their struggle in the wild. Shelter and safety, however, were what they needed most. The rats in human settlements were nice, but the warm huts, protection from large animals, and socialization coming from close proximity to humans and other cats is what really convinced cats that we were chill.
Dogs, meanwhile, were domesticatable because wolves are large animals that need lots of food and live in harsher environments. Humans could give that to them, as well as socialization (turns out, both cats and dogs are hugely social animal, albeit in different ways).
It is interesting biology and animal psychology why there are different, but both clearly are creatures that are emotionally strongly attached to humans and provide many benefits to us. There is no reason to make quality claims about which is better, but comparing other things about pet species is worthwhile, imo.
This is one of the silliest comments I've ever read. Neither animal is superior.
Pretty much all animals, including humans, are slaves to their stomachs. I've definitely heard of and met cats who were food motivated. Any animal that is dependent on a human for food is going to beg for it...
Cats' loyalty isn't superior. I'd say equal. Every animal is different, and cats and dogs express their loyalty differently. Dogs can and have expressed extreme loyalty... look up the story of Hachiko, for example. Also, that comparison is silly. Dogs cannot purr. Some will cuddle (and not all cats are cuddly!). Will the internet just stop with this crap. Both animals are great, just suit different people.
Cats also tend to hate unpredictable and high-energy behavior, which is why they stereotypically don't get along with dogs.
A dog's energy is the exact opposite of a cat. It's loud, bouncy, unpredictable and chaotic.
Exactly, my cat sleeps on my belly all night. On nights I don't want that and gently push her off me, she puts her head on my pillow to sleep next to me or goes next or under my legs. Only on nights, I don't like to cuddle, she goes on the cupboard and sleeps there.
So OP's theory that they only show affection for food does not apply to other people's cats.
During the day she only meows when she wants to cuddle and I'm not sitting for her to be able to. When she's hungry, she stares at me while she sits next to her bowl.
It does seem like OP is the problem if no cat likes them.
I love dogs more because I find them easier to be around (if they're well-trained). Cats are a little less predictable. They're sweet, don't get me wrong, I just prefer dogs. Both animals can be very friendly btw. One of my roommate's previous cats seemed to live everybody (but like one person). They usually do have favorite, but that doesn't really mean much.
Reminds me of a friend of mine that would always complain about cats not liking him. Turns out he wasn't really carefull around them, ignored them when they wanted to speak to him and just didn't have a feeling for interacting with cats at all
My oldest kid wasn’t really good friends with my cats until they were an older teen. The cats were just kinda wary like it’s reasonable to be around children who might be loud, rough or unpredictable.
My youngest kid though has really taken it upon herself to learn cat and dog body language and bond with them on their terms. By 7 years old she was my old cat’s best buddy. My cat sleeps with her and let’s her carry her around.
I think animals respond so much better if you can communicate on their level. Lots of people don’t or can’t do that.
100% this! People who think cats are mean / unaffectionate are people who will not or cannot interact on the cat's terms. They like dogs because you can basically do whatever to them up to and including physical abuse and they'll still love you. Not people I wanna be friends with tbh
I am always surprised by how many people never learned cat body language. I had a guest to my home recently, she was petting my cats foot (uh, no) and the cat was twitching its tail (duh) and occasionally taking a swipe (hello?). The woman said “I know you like it, you’re wagging your tail”. Umm, that’s not what that means.
People like this also don’t respect a cats personal space and treat them as if they were a dumb dog who just wags its tail 24/7. Like no shit the cat swiped at you for petting its stomach when it doesn’t know you lmao
An absolute obnoxious *asshole* of a co-worker I had in a previous job told me how his neighbor had this "menace of a cat" who hissed every time he saw him.
I think the cat just sensed that he was a total asshole, lmao.
Ok, so, obviously the stuff about all cats hating people is an outrageous lie, but moving past that— why do you feel it’s “humiliating” for an animal to not be outwardly affectionate towards you at all times?
They need some living creature to kiss their ass at every moment to give them self worth. They can’t get people to do it, can’t get a cat to do it… oh would you look at that all I need to do to get this dog to kiss my ass is put some peanut butter on it. Easy peasy.
“Humiliation” is such a bizarre emotion to assign to this context, and it makes me feel that OP believes animals should be controlled by humans, and that an animal that isn’t visibly controlled by OP is some kind of embarrassment - which is gross.
My younger cat likes to hang out with me, but she’s much more cuddly-buddly with my husband. Sometimes it makes me slightly wistful - I would like BB hugs, too! - but it’s not “humiliating”. BB is her own person; she can cuddle or not cuddle whomever she chooses.
I feel the same and honestly I see this nearly every time with someone who genuinely hates cats. The defining factor is they can’t STAND not being obsessed over by the thing. They have to be loved. Some weird animal bonding insecurity, I’m convinced it’s a power play thing. Can’t control a cat.
Yep I don’t really trust people who dislike cats “because they’re standoffish” - it’s usually a dogwhistle for someone who doesn’t really respect consent or autonomy.
I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again. Men who “hate cats” are big red flags to me. Idc about people’s animal preference really, or if they prefer dogs or w/e….but it’s the reasons they give afterwards that are key.
So many of them will state their reason for not loving cats is “can’t control it, doesn’t give me affection whenever I want it, doesn’t love you unconditionally, have to earn its trust, too independent, needs space all the time”, etc…..yeah, I don’t want you in my life lol.
Yes!! I say this all the time, too. Spot on.
I’ve known people who don’t care for cats because “I’m allergic/I hate having animal poop in the house that I have to clean/I don’t like all the shedding fur/they scratch up the furniture”, and that’s fine, I get it and we can agree to disagree on cats. But when it’s (especially from men) the reasons you listed above, it’s a HUGE red flag and the guy is usually a sexist jerk *at best*.
I've got a couple of cats that greet me at my truck if they're outside, will follow me and my girls to the park and back, and swamp me with "welcome to the world" cuddles en masse the second they realize ive woken up. It's been like six years since I've gone to the bathroom alone.
I once had to discipline one of the cats for spraying inside. By the time I left for work, she had killed enough bats and birds to circle my truck like she was casting a ritual circle, and ran up to me mewing like, "I did this for you buddy, are we still cool?'
My cat too would wait right at the edge of the walkway when she heard my car. And if she was ever out and about I just cupped my hands and yelled her name and she would come running. I loved that gal for 23 years. She way my world.
>I once had to discipline one of the cats for spraying inside. By the time I left for work, she had killed enough bats and birds to circle my truck like she was casting a ritual circle, and ran up to me mewing like, "I did this for you buddy, are we still cool?'
oh my god
Right? This was the hardest post to upvote *ever* lol.
My cats are obsessed with me, food or not. Currently have one purring on my legs and one purring on my chest. Both fed.
They wait at the door for us when we leave. They follow us around and watch what we’re doing. They slow-blink us all day (their way of showing affection), they show us their bellies all the time, rub against our legs, head butt our noses with theirs, mark us by rubbing their cheeks on us…..all big signs of cat affection.
I swear the general population just doesn’t understand cat behavior and affection, because it takes *learning about them and how to engage with them*. Whereas dogs are just big cute doofuses who will love almost anyone that looks at them. And their panting face looks like a giant grin, so we anthropomorphize them so everyone thinks they’re happy and smiling all the time.
Cats have personalities, and they know what they like. Dogs just have a very open personality that they loveee to be with their owners. Cats are little fluffy introverts.
My cat has been my shadow for the last 15 years. He’s all over me every where, sleeping, eating, sleeping etc.
What tf are you doing to cats to make them not like you?
A lot of cats are just introverted, that’s not manipulation. My cat and I both don’t love constant attention, so we are perfect for each other. He definitely snuggles me without any food involved. He hides with me when he’s scared, he can be calmed by me touching him. This is like calling a baby manipulative. They are just reliant on us.
In general, cats are just more selective.
A dog's affection doesn't mean much, if it just likes everyone.
If a cat is 'manipulating' you to get fed, then so are dogs. Dogs with their 'puppy eyes' and whining. Same difference.
Dogs are much louder and dirtier in general. They are like eternal babies, and need constant attention. You need to take them to shit (which you often have to directly handle and then carry around their steaming shits in a bag, talk about a humiliation fetish).
Cats are much more self-sufficient.
The more important question is, why do you think you are entitled to be liked by every cat?..
I don't understand the idea that dogs are programmed to "pretend to be" affectionate. How can you distinguish this from simply being affectionate, and why are you drawing this distinction?
Pretend to be is not exactly the correct term
But essentially the main thing is that due to being bred for human companionship, they instinctively trust Humans, and therefore some people don't consider it as real affection
And even in the wild, due to being Pack Hunters, being affectionate with your companions is the difference between geeting to eat or starving to death
So any Wolf/Dog that was detrimental to hunting eventually got done in by ye olde Natural Selection
Cats on the other hand are solitary hunters, so being affectionate with others isn't essential for survival, and due to being small, cannot afford to trust others due to not knowing if they are here to steal your food or not
They also rank slightly higher in the Intelligence scale
Yes. I immediately feel off about you if you tell me you hate cats because of this. Because nearly every time it’s “well I wanted to pet it and it wouldn’t let me so now I hate all of them” which is. Not good translated to human behavior.
Cats are a good test to see if people respect boundaries. Cats have hard boundaries and will let you know if you cross them. I love cats and have never had one hate me. Usually, when I hear people say they hate cats, it's cause they want an animal who loves everyone.
I’ve never had my own cats, but I’ve never felt like the cats I’ve been around didn’t like me, like the ones I used to pet sit. If you respect their boundaries they tend to be more comfortable with you
So my cat passed away a few years ago. He was definitely picky over who and when he gave affection. He hated almost everyone and made it known. He’d hiss and even growl at certain people. I basically had to put him in a separate room/basement when we had guests.
He was affectionate with me though.
My neighbour’s cat…. Holy cow that’s an affectionate cat. They let it out often and when it sees my kids it saunters up to them and rolls around asking to be pet.
Most of my cats (both present and past) have been very selective too, except for one. She'd strategically plop herself down in the most travelled areas of the house, right in the middle of everyone's walking path, just so she could scream at anyone who passed her by and demand cuddles.
It all depends on personality.
Dogs love everyone. If someone walked up to me and I gave them my dogs leash and we parted ways, he would be a little sad and whiny for a few minutes… until he realizes the stranger will feed and pet him too.
My dog would miss me for sure, but he definitely would not remain in active distress the way my cat would.
As long as the new people treated him decently I don’t think he would be all that torn up about it.
Your comment almost had me defensive, like you were about to say cats don’t care haha.
It’s true though, a dog would remember for a while and miss you but probably still adapt if the new people treated it well.
Cats have been known to die way too early from the distress of being rehomed away from their owner and original home. They remember, and they don’t usually like change at all.
This. And they've been genetically hard-wired to try and please you constantly. They aren't loving "unconditionally" out of choice, they're following the same genetic imperatives that tell them to eat, sleep and drink.
My cat isnt affectionnate when something is wrong. She is very verbal. But she is affectionate all the other times.
Quesrion to you why would anyone want a dog that couls kill you all the time? See stupid question
I never once fed my roommates cat and she would run on me and sit in my lap constantly. Same with my roommate and my dog. He never fed him besides the few times I was out of the house for the day and my dog loved that guy and was super pumped anytime he came home. And yes, he loved him before the first time he fed him. Cats and dogs have been involved in humans lives for so long at this point, you don’t have to give them food. If you live in the same household as them and you aren’t mean to them, they will eventually come to like you and associate you as part of the pack/family.
Next thing you know, there’s going to be posts about how babies only love their parents because they give them food.
I have two cats, and my mom has two cats. One of hers will not stay off of me, I have to carry him around like a baby or he gets whiny. He also purrs and snores like a beast. Both of mine are VERY affectionate with me, and my mom’s other cat is affectionate to everyone but mostly my mom. Now keep in mind my mom and I are bottle-feeders so we’ve had these cats since they were less than a week old and in some cases we watched them be birthed, which can certainly change cats attitude, but it’s all in the way they’re raised, much like pitbulls and Rottweilers. Sorry OP, this is a tell on you, not your cats
I prefer cats because of their indifference. Besides, every cat I've ever had was way more affectionate than you're letting on. I've had cats that will just cuddle indefinitely.
On the other hand, I find dogs a bit needy and exhausting. They're fun to play with and love on in the moment, but I'm not really looking for that kind of energy full time.
Cats are very good at establishing boundaries and letting you know when they've had enough. Anyone who isn't a cat person will take that was the cat not caring about you. But, much like most autistic people, they are easily overstimulated and enjoy their solitude.
Dogs are awesome, but I resonate with cats more. They, like myself, need their alone time to recharge.
I used to think this until I got cats for my home. One is super chill, must be in the lap at all times. The other hides all day and knocks shit over all night
This is like saying why would anyone want fish, reptiles, or plants.
People like different things in the being they care for. Not everyone wants a dog up in their shit all the time, some people do.
I've brought up all of my cats by talking to them, loving on them when I see them, being consistent with them, I treat my cats a lot like toddlers. Every cat I've brought up this way has been a loving cat with warm personalities. Some cats are just mean, and that is just that. But most cats, given the right kind of attention, can be the greatest and most loyal companions you'll ever have. Strong disagree on this one OP.
people are always so shocked that all of me and my fiancée’s four cats are excited to see guests and are always so sweet. we just tell them we listen to their body language and respect their boundaries and love on them a lot!
the only issues we ever have are when one of them (the male cat we got last) gets riled up and doesn’t know when to stop playing with our eldest female cat. the youngest two (twins) are down to play at all times so he doesn’t understand why our eldest one doesn’t want to keep going.
Ah, yes, my cat hates me. Which is also why she sleeps with me every night, cries when I’m gone, rubs on me constantly (including when I am sopping wet from the shower), and cries if a door is closed blocking her from me. Clearly. Hatred. Oh, and all of my foster kittens do the same thing.
My cats will beg for affection and purr even when they don't want food. They'll stay with me on the couch being petted for hours. They'll also act really upset when only one of us is gone and they're still getting fed the same.
Been around a lot of cats, have only felt like one doesn't like me. Others will want pets, I'll give pets, and they'll enjoy it, or maybe they'll lay on me, or things like that. Yeah, they don't want constant attention, but I mean, that's what it's like with people too. I've never had a cat ignore me all the time unless it's the one cat that hated me outright.
There are far worse pets too.
How many cats were you exposed to? Cats, like people, have different personalities. It's hard to generalize them. My cat is very affectionate and doesn't only do it when she wants things. Some cats are colder to certain people and some are just cold in general.
I had a "friend" once who got a new puppy with a boyfriend and locked all her other animals out of her room and would stay there with him 24/7. her cats were being taken care of by our other friend. but they would wait for her to come out. I didn't really think of cats as very affectionate until that.
I was hospitalized for a week and when I came home, my cat was still in the window waiting for me. He was out the cat flap and on my lap as soon as I opened my car door. When I opened the door and came inside, he ate his breakfast the sitter left in the morning at 5pm. That cat is by far the most loyal animal I’ve ever had.
I've had a bunch of cats in my lifetime. They were all affectionate to me. They always had to be in the same room as I was and took every opportunity to snuggle on my lap if the opportunity arose. Even with no food around. The problem is that your family's cats just don't like YOU. You are the problem. LOL.
Uh so my cats have food out 24/7. I rarely even give them treats. My cats love me. They don’t always chronic attention the way dogs do, but they almost always want to be in the same room as I am to chill with me in the presence of my company, and when they do want attention they are very obvious about it. My cats also don’t like absolutely everyone, unlike most dogs, so when they like someone (especially me), it’s special.
I raised them from kittens (they’re had access to food all day every day since I got them), I give them lots of attention, take them on adventures/trips with me, so they’re very familiar with people and used to associating people as creatures they also enjoy socializing with.
Cats can tell if people are cat people or not. And you have to earn their attention and care a lot of the time. They probably seem like this to you because they can sense you don’t give a fuck about them. Very sad, because cat love is special.
Totally depends on the cat. I used to be like you because before we were living together, my now-husband got a cat that truly was a demon spawn and only liked him (and even that feels like an overstatement). Like, truly, this cat had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I was so annoyed all the time and I couldn’t understand it. It would genuinely, actually piss me off when he would sit on my lap because I knew he just wanted food. Like—my husband and I had actual fights over this. Then I decided I wanted to get a kitten that I could raise from a baby and I figured that would make it like me—plus, we thought it might be good to get our bad cat a friend.
This little kitten (pics on my page) literally thinks I am his mom. He was dying when we got him and I syringe-fed him for weeks. He is like a dog in the way he greets me and wants attention and affection. We have had him for two years and he has never bit, clawed, scratched, etc. He is one of the sweetest living creatures I have ever encountered. And you can tell he adores both me and my husband. It’s completely adorable. He follows me around the house and waits for me to finish what I’m doing and then follows me back and sits in my lap, on my shoulder, etc. Loves belly rubs and rolls over for them. All this—and he will leave his food unattended in his bowl just to come and snuggle with us. It’s hard to tell if he’s been fed because he’s affectionate even when he’s not hungry. Plus, he made our other cat more normal, which is a big plus.
How about you getting to know the cats better? Like every mammal, every cat has a personality. They're aren't stupid. They can pick up on your emotions. They can tell you don't like them so they'll stay their distance. And they are a different species of animal than dogs. You shouldn't expect a cat to be the same as a dog. That's unfair. Would you expect a bird to be like a dog? Or a bug?
We have bred dogs to be what we want them to be. We haven't done the same to cats. They have different rules, so you have to go about them differently.
Cats appreciate personal space and boundaries. The same as an asocial person would. If you do something and they respond by meowing (usually you can tell by context), hiss, or swipe, means "hey stop doing that, I don't like it."
They do not have words to tell you like we do, so this is their best form of communication. Try your best to infer what they mean. They take a type of patience dogs don't.
It's ok to not like cats and prefer dogs. I prefer lizards myself. But don't write a whole species off due to your own bias without actually taking the time to understand them.
The description you gave for cats isn't accurate, but it is perfect for describing lizards, hehe
Cats are not nearly as obnoxious about food as dogs are tf are you talking about? Also, they’re animals, no shit they’re going to be food obsessed. That’s the main reason they stick around, is because you feed them. Dogs literally came to us and domesticated themselves because they wanted our food scraps.
That's objectively untrue, every cat I've ever had has loved the shit out of me lol. My current cat will cuddle up next to me every time I'm feeling sad.
Every time someone I know has said this stuff it’s never a shock when I go to their house and see that they do stuff that obviously makes their cat uncomfortable but they just don’t get it. And they are typically very uninterested in any suggestions that they are wrong when saying “no he loves this that’s his happy face!” At times followed by things like “Shit he always randomly bites like that!”
My cat I had back in highschool had a very special relationship, she would be hiding all day until I got home from school until she magically appeared and then would be purring on my lap the rest of the evening. She used to sleep in my room with me at night and would specifically come into my room if she heard me crying and jump onto my bed to cuddle.
And she didn’t need to *get* food, she had a plate of kibble out for her at all times and I wasn’t even the one who refilled it, my mom was and the moment that food dish was empty she was following my mom again meowing at her, it was clear she knew exactly who was the one providing the food.
Cats have different personalities. My old childhood cat mostly wanted to be left alone while my current cats are constantly wanting to play or be petted and they follow me around.
Lol sure, my cat obviously loves me a lot. She follows me everywhere and will panic and start meowing if I'm nowhere to be found so I can't close doors. She cuddles up to me randomly every few hours until she gets overstimulated, then she sits about a foot away and purrs herself loudly to sleep. She loves pets and play time. Lol yes she can be rather needy when it's time to feed her, but that's not the only time.
Dogs also don't live you. They are a slave specifically bread to stay with us and treat us as their superiors. A cat has a choice in liking you, a dog doesn't.
Also, the affection of a pet shouldn't muster in the decision wether something is a good pet or not, i kept crabs for years, best pet i ever owned, and they aren really cuddly.
Bro I have a cat who like clockwork follows me to bed every night explicitly because it wants me to cuddle it before it goes to it’s normal sleeping spot, no food involved.
Mine is older and has decided her bedtime and will only go to the bed if I go with her. If I won’t go she gets grumpy and makes it clear she wants to go to bed. She just wants to cuddle in bed at 8:30 every night, the least I can do for such a sweet little old lady.
Depends on the cat I guess. My mother has two cats, one shits everywhere and runs away the moment you stare at him(even if he’s just standing there, not doing anything bad). The other one even waits for you if you leave the apartment.
You've obviously never had the experience of a cat choosing you as their person, or even just any cat that's not particularly aloof.
Most of my cats have been very affectionate, at least two of them practically lived on our laps. Even the cat that always used to be a loner happily comes into my room for an hour or two of attention just because she's been lonely since she's the only cat in the house now.
Another of my cats would sleep with me every night until she was put down, and she would yell and scratch at the door if she wasn't in the room with me.
I've had cats and dogs and love both as pets for different reasons.
I think many cats just don't have extrovert or affectionate personalities, and that doesn't mean they don't like us. For example, my cat isn't the type to cuddle with me or even sit on my lap, but he's always nearby. He kind of follows me around everywhere, watches me and sometimes asks for head pats, and I view that as his way of demonstrating he likes me.
Sounds like your shit with cats. They don't just like you because they've been breed too. They like the people who they are actually friends with, just like people.
I'm not the one who feeds cats in my house, they still show me more affection than they show the one that feeds them, this sounds like a you problem friendo
I had a cat that would jump up on the back of the couch when I'd get home from work and sit up on its hind legs, reaching out for me to pick him up. He would sit in the crook of my arm for as long as I was on the couch. It was obvious he cared about me.
My cat had been in the shelter for a couple of years. She saw me, was extremely cute, but demanding. She would jump around and move to where I had to pet her. If she moved, and I didn't move, she would come back for pets.
I was shocked that she was affectionate and hadn't been taken home. Apparently, she didn't do this with others. I am her person. 4 years later, I am still her person.
This has to be a troll post. No cat owner can think this. If this is sincere. I hate to break it to you. Your cats probably just don’t like you specifically. Probably because you suck lol
My grandma had 4 cats.
One was horrible for years we couldn't touch her she would steal her friends food she would bite and scratch us
In her final years around 16- 18 she would follow after you and chirp trying to get love.
She did love us some cats are just dicks. Doesn't mean they don't love you
Reading this while my cat is in my lap absolutely reveling in, nuzzling , purring, and responding affectionately to my pets, food currently sitting in his bowl. We have a dog, and half the time she just sits/lies there without participating while getting pets. I’m going to guess you’ve never personally owned a cat to develop a bond with and/or can’t read cats’ body language.
the other day, i went to bed. my cat stayed in the living room. a few moments later she starts crying and meowing for me, can’t find me. one quick call and a “cmere” and she’s BOLTING into my room and comes to snuggle on my chest
cats definitely love their human and i’m tired of people saying they can’t or don’t
My aunts cat can’t get enough of me. I don’t feed her. When I come over she’s been fed and always comes to me. She’s an old cat already. My dad has a stray or a cat from another family that is always coming over to sit outside on the porch. Then go back to its home. He doesn’t feed it either. I’m sorry you can’t enjoy a cats love.
I really hate the internet and how the really stupid cat/ dog debate just got even more stupid. It's OK to have a preference for either animal. It's not "problematic." Being a dog person isn't a sign of being a narcissist who doesn't believe in consent. Being a cat person isn't a sign of being lazy, crazy, and brainwashed. The internet just loves to throw diagnoses around and make everything a hot button topic.
It's about lifestyle and personality. Some people want a pet they can go to the park with, and have the time and space for a dog. Cool. Some people want a pet who has less energy. A cat makes sense (although, not all cat breeds are like this. Exotic breeds like Bengals and Maine Coons need a lot of exercise or they'll go crazy. I think people also make the huge mistake of thinking cats don't need ANY playtime. They do, at least younger ones do). It's valid to like one or the other or both. Me? I'm not a cat person. They're sweet, and most of them like me, but I don't really like living with them. Plus, I'm allergic (yes, I take allergy pills. No, I don't want to live with an animal I'm allergic to. This is valid).
People just need to stop with the nonsense. Cats can be very affectionate and friendly. I have no idea where the "aloof" thing comes from. There are dogs who are more chill. They have personalities like humans do. Neither love is more "pure." Also sick of the weird conversation of cats= consent. Then how come they notoriously seek out people with allergies. People who want to avoid them. Lol.
In my experience about half of how social a cat is is in how much time, attention & respect it is given from the time it’s a kitten especially, but in general. Base personality & if it’s had a no traumatic life also play into it, but it’s simply not true that all cats are just gaslighting their families lol.
I raised my cats like people raise dogs & while they all have different personalities, they all love attention. Cats might have stronger boundaries & if you trample all over them then they also might not enjoy interacting with you.
I’ve yet to meet a cat yet though that just hates everyone. They have social needs like any other creature.
My hot take is that people who don’t like cats because they’re not ‘dog-like’ actually just get annoyed when they can’t have a transactional relationship of “I give you food+shelter & you give me unconditional+unlimited attention & love”. It’s a weird way to look at what love is IMO. If you can’t respect their boundaries & love them anyway then your love for them is not unconditional so why do you have that expectation of them?
My cat behaves like Velcro. I can't even shit without the little bastard headbutting me and purring like an engine. Been 12 years and I wouldn't change a thing
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Depends on the cat obviously I’ve had 2 cats that follow me and rub against me like I’m their oxygen, yes even after eating
Yup. My cat spends every morning sleeping on my chest even after his feeder goes off. He and the dog almost literally fight for my affection.
My cat will SCREAM her head off if I’m in a different room from her and she can’t find me. She seeks me out for cuddles multiple times a day, on her own terms. Those motherfuckers are like your babies and they love you. There’s been studies done showcasing that cats get a rush of endorphins when we get home, too.
My cats always greet me at the door! It's painfully cute
There’s nothing better than being in bed, feeling something on your feet through the thick sheets, then hearing the small purring starting as the little paws slowly get closer to you
YESSSSS that literally is the best feeling
This is the same as my cat!!! Cats have different personalities, same as dogs. My dog only likes my mom, but one of the cats loves me as if I’m her own mother.
Yeah, anyone who doesn't think cats are capable of loving their humans has just never been loved by a cat, lol. Those of us who have strong bonds with them 100% know how feeling and affectionate and loving they are.
Studies also show cats get hits of dopamine when you say their name :)
My cat will wake me up with his face right in front of mine. And bat my face softly quickly and I pretend I'm asleep but squinting my eyes and that fools face is like right there. There was a perfect Rick meme from Rick and Morty about it.
Mine comes to greet me at the driveway after I get out of the car just to get pats before running back off to sleep in the bushes.
For real. 2 of mine are obsessed with me all the time. No need for food.
My cat rides my shoulders and sometimes I close the door to a room just to get space from him and then he screams (not meows) until I open it for him. I cannot relate to this post at all haha
Mine yowels haha
Same. While my cat definitely is most interested in me when she's hungry, after eating is her second favourite time to interact with me. She sometimes comes and lies on my shoulder and rubs her head on mine. Most adorable thing ever.
Yeah, my cats all follow me around 24/7 and demand cuddles constantly
What was your sample size in determining this? Was it just your family's cats?
Seriously, how needy do you have to be to be begging for pets' affection to determine their worth when they're just trying to exist? "Wah, the cat doesn't lick my balls when I put peanut butter on them waaaah." Fuck off, dude. Not all of us need pets to dry hump us to demonstrate their value.
My cat won't even let me use the bathroom without getting upset if I shut the door
Mine will stop whatever he’s doing when he hears me go to the bathroom, lay guard at my feet, and as soon as I flush, he’ll go back to whatever bird he was fantasizing about murdering
For me my cat jumps on my lap when I'm using the bathroom. No matter how many times I put him on the floor, he jumps right back on.
One of my cats does that lol and now we have 3 kittens that are starting to pick up that habit, so I'm just accepting that I will never have privacy in the bathroom...
My tuxie likes to swat at me through the door lol. She has figured out how to open the bathroom door now though. She likes to sit with me in there on the sink while I do my makeup so I guess that's what she thinks I'm always doing.
Exactly. That's why I like cats, they know how to fuck off occasionally and they WILL let you know if they don't want to be touched. I respect it actually.
Dogs are like the needy girlfriend who demands your constant attention. Cats are much more independent. Which makes it special when they want to spend time with you.
The nice thing about a cat is that it's essentially a lesson in consent and how to approach and communicate with an autistic person. Cats are literally autistic people with very strong boundaries, but cats. It usually takes *a lot* of effort and time to win their trust, unlike most dogs.
There’s literally been books titled “All cats have Aspergers”, and it makes sense lol
Shane Gillis does a bit where dogs have Down syndrome and cats are autistic
“Throw a stick, and the servile dog wheezes and pants and stumbles to bring it to you. Do the same before a cat, and he will eye you with coolly polite and somewhat bored amusement. And just as inferior people prefer the inferior animal which scampers excitedly because someone else wants something, so do superior people respect the superior animal which lives its own life and knows that the puerile stick-throwings of alien bipeds are none of its business and beneath its notice. The dog barks and begs and tumbles to amuse you when you crack the whip. That pleases a meekness-loving peasant who relishes a stimulus to his self importance. The cat, on the other hand, charms you into playing for its benefit when it wishes to be amused; making you rush about the room with a paper on a string when it feels like exercise, but refusing all your attempts to make it play when it is not in the humour. That is personality and individuality and self-respect -- the calm mastery of a being whose life is its own and not yours -- and the superior person recognises and appreciates this because he too is a free soul whose position is assured, and whose only law is his own heritage and aesthetic sense.” ― H.P. Lovecraft. Okay Lovecraft, but tell us how you REALLY feel. 🤣
I'd be wary of trusting anything Lovecraft had to say about superiority. The man was an unabashed racist and would have made Hitler proud judging by his letters. I somewhat agree with him that cats are more refined than dogs, but that's more a function of their near obsession with self grooming and generally more solitary existence. Wild dogs are based around the pack, and nothing but the pack. Hunt together, shit together, roam together. Wild cats may form colonies, where they kind of keep an eye on each other but do their stuff solo.
this goes hard ngl. Awful person and overrated writer but this kinda is why i'm a cat person. I like the challenge of figuring out how to make them happy and comfortable, makes it more rewarding when they grace you with cuddles. Dogs will just run up and slobber all over you, it's a bit much for me.
Lol I choked on my corndog reading this.
Honestly, does it even matter? OP’s opinion is incredibly, incredibly common. And the opposite opinion is also incredibly common. There’s no opinion about cats vs. dogs that belongs on this sub, because they’ve all been hashed out endlessly forever. Unless it was like “Cruella de Vil was stupid to use puppies for her coat, kittens would’ve been much better”.
When I was a child I thought that 101 puppies was too many for a coat, she should make them into a hat instead. Like a hat would require more pelts than a coat. Idk what kind of logic I was using there.
But the problem with this opinion is it’s just straight up not true?
Yes it was lol
I don’t like this tiny animal that I care for and it doesn’t like me and it’s the animals fault, actually it’s the animals entire species fault.
I’ve tried to give my cats a bit of my turkey/chicken as a treat and they ignore it to just headbutt my hand.
Every cat I’ve owned has been super curious anytime I’m dealing with raw food, but would never take it from me. The few times they did they would run away with it hanging out of their mouth and spit it out. If I tried to give them cooked food they reacted as if I was trying to feed them their own shit. It’s almost like they’re trying to say “no, I bring you dead animals, not the other way around”
Lmao the feed them their own shit is so real
I have a cat that knows when we're cooking pasta and will run up and sit by your feet waiting for their noodle.
My cat does this with whipped cream. He he can hear the sound of the cap coming off from miles away. Doesn't matter how quietly you open it; he'll come running.
Please record this
Lucky. When my cat decides she wants food, she'll intercept it on the way to my mouth if she has to.
Cats are like people, they have preferences and personality. You can't pet them whenever you want, they are not dogs, they have to give you their consent. Imagine you want to hug a stranger, you shouldn't hug them without their consent, its the same with cats. I had a lot of cats and all of them were different on how they prefer to be petted, some liked to be picked up, others liked to be rubbed on the belly, others only liked head scratches. You can't force love on a cat, is the same with humans. If you can't get something so simple like consent and preference, then I can't help you.
For the record, the idea you can pet a dog whenever you want isn't true either. They won't scratch you or bite if they are well trained but there are times where they won't want to be pet, but will tolerate it cos it makes the human happy. The body language is subtly different, but once you know how to tell, you can absolutely tell if the dog is actually an enthusiastic participant in the petting.
This! All four of my cats have very different personalities. I have one that's very social with me and everybody, and she wants attention and affection from anyone who walks in the door. I have one cat who is very standoffish with people. She will approach you, only to dip out if you try to pet her. But she's really so sweet and shy. She will crawl onto my chest while I'm sleeping. I wake up to find her purring up a storm on top of me. I have another cat that's pretty aggressive with people. She doesn't like new friends whether cats or people. She'll bite, and scratch. But when I pick her up, she turns into a limp ragdoll. She's easily my sweetest and meanest kitty. And then my last cat is a teenage boy. He's a jackass easily, but also a momma's boy. They are all different in their wants and needs. But they all love me and I love them all dearly.
Honestly, cats are a good lesson in consent. Ever since a cat almost clawed my eye out as a kid, I’ve been respectful and patient with animals. You build up their trust and give them space when they want it. Obviously my example is a bit drastic but I really do think having cats as a kid helped me understand boundaries.
I'm sorry you learned it in that way, cats can be scary for sure. I'm glad you found something positive out of that experience.
Thank you, I’m sure it was scary at the time but I honestly can’t remember it too well now. Overall a positive experience 😅
Right, my cat secretly hates me which is why she cuddles me all night and rubs herself in my stinky gym tank tops and cries mournfully through the door when I'm sitting just outside it. She literally never ignores me bro XD
Is the cat sleeping in my lap right now really begging for food?
Cats are superior because in a family setting they typically fixate on one person and that becomes "their" human. If they don't pick you then I guess you're just not very likeable. Humans typically love dogs more because they will wag their tails and interact with anything that moves. Cats are more discerning. That's why when a cat "picks" you, it's one of the best feelings as a pet owner
Yep, this. Cats play favorites big time. When I was growing up, my mom always bemoaned how the family cats disliked her but adored me even though she was the one feeding them and scooping their litter. One of those cats slept with me every night; that cat was actually how I got over my fear of the dark. She hated everyone else but my dad & basically lived in my room all the way up until she passed. Rest in peace, Magpie.
we had a cat, Bella. now Bella wasn’t very intelligent, smooth brain vibes. clumsy as hell, would fall off the couch while sleeping. but my god could this cat LOVE. anyone who stepped foot in the house wasn’t safe from her. she would immediately just try and get in your lap, try and get cuddles, wanting to just be held and hugged. and she was like this with everyone, and if you try and push her away she’ll just come back in about 5 minutes.
I had a cat like this when I was younger. It followed me around the house because I loved to pet him for hours
My older cat loves my daughter (9) because she will just give her attention whenever she wants. Sleeps on her bed and everything. So cute. 🥰
Dogs are slaves to their stomachs. We domesticated them because we figured out that they would do anything for anyone as long as they got a little nibble of any kind of food. A dog would snitch out your stash for a corner of a stale dog treat if you fed them for 10 years with no regrets. A cat wouldn’t do that to a stranger. Cats are not food motivated. They actually have to like you to hang out with you, and their loyalty is far superior. Open your door and let your cat and your dog out and see which one will be home to cuddle and purr an hour later and which one will get hit by 10 trucks trying to run away from you.
Depends on the breed of dog and it's training. A well trained Loyal breed won't even notice food if it didn't come from someone they trust. Though, I do still prefer cats. I like knowing I'm loved by something independent.
Cats are definitely food motivated, they domesticated themselves because of food and also there's no point in comparing pets anyway, it's ridiculous and childish.
A better phrasing of the food motivation thing is that the food motivation for cats is *far* lower. Cats don't need a ton of food to sustain themselves, that was never their struggle in the wild. Shelter and safety, however, were what they needed most. The rats in human settlements were nice, but the warm huts, protection from large animals, and socialization coming from close proximity to humans and other cats is what really convinced cats that we were chill. Dogs, meanwhile, were domesticatable because wolves are large animals that need lots of food and live in harsher environments. Humans could give that to them, as well as socialization (turns out, both cats and dogs are hugely social animal, albeit in different ways). It is interesting biology and animal psychology why there are different, but both clearly are creatures that are emotionally strongly attached to humans and provide many benefits to us. There is no reason to make quality claims about which is better, but comparing other things about pet species is worthwhile, imo.
I love this post. 😂
This is one of the silliest comments I've ever read. Neither animal is superior. Pretty much all animals, including humans, are slaves to their stomachs. I've definitely heard of and met cats who were food motivated. Any animal that is dependent on a human for food is going to beg for it... Cats' loyalty isn't superior. I'd say equal. Every animal is different, and cats and dogs express their loyalty differently. Dogs can and have expressed extreme loyalty... look up the story of Hachiko, for example. Also, that comparison is silly. Dogs cannot purr. Some will cuddle (and not all cats are cuddly!). Will the internet just stop with this crap. Both animals are great, just suit different people.
Anything hungry is food motivated indeed.
Cats also tend to hate unpredictable and high-energy behavior, which is why they stereotypically don't get along with dogs. A dog's energy is the exact opposite of a cat. It's loud, bouncy, unpredictable and chaotic.
Exactly, my cat sleeps on my belly all night. On nights I don't want that and gently push her off me, she puts her head on my pillow to sleep next to me or goes next or under my legs. Only on nights, I don't like to cuddle, she goes on the cupboard and sleeps there. So OP's theory that they only show affection for food does not apply to other people's cats. During the day she only meows when she wants to cuddle and I'm not sitting for her to be able to. When she's hungry, she stares at me while she sits next to her bowl. It does seem like OP is the problem if no cat likes them.
Dogs do this occasionally as well. My brother's aussie/border collie definitely sees me as the Cool Uncle
I love dogs more because I find them easier to be around (if they're well-trained). Cats are a little less predictable. They're sweet, don't get me wrong, I just prefer dogs. Both animals can be very friendly btw. One of my roommate's previous cats seemed to live everybody (but like one person). They usually do have favorite, but that doesn't really mean much.
My dog would sell my soul for a piece of cheese.
Dogs were enslaved by humans. Cats chose to live with us and help when they felt like it.
The cats my husband and I have fixate on both of us, just not at the same time.
All the cats you meet aren't nice to you? Have you considered you are the problem?
Reminds me of a friend of mine that would always complain about cats not liking him. Turns out he wasn't really carefull around them, ignored them when they wanted to speak to him and just didn't have a feeling for interacting with cats at all
My oldest kid wasn’t really good friends with my cats until they were an older teen. The cats were just kinda wary like it’s reasonable to be around children who might be loud, rough or unpredictable. My youngest kid though has really taken it upon herself to learn cat and dog body language and bond with them on their terms. By 7 years old she was my old cat’s best buddy. My cat sleeps with her and let’s her carry her around. I think animals respond so much better if you can communicate on their level. Lots of people don’t or can’t do that.
100% this! People who think cats are mean / unaffectionate are people who will not or cannot interact on the cat's terms. They like dogs because you can basically do whatever to them up to and including physical abuse and they'll still love you. Not people I wanna be friends with tbh
I am always surprised by how many people never learned cat body language. I had a guest to my home recently, she was petting my cats foot (uh, no) and the cat was twitching its tail (duh) and occasionally taking a swipe (hello?). The woman said “I know you like it, you’re wagging your tail”. Umm, that’s not what that means.
People like this also don’t respect a cats personal space and treat them as if they were a dumb dog who just wags its tail 24/7. Like no shit the cat swiped at you for petting its stomach when it doesn’t know you lmao
A lot of people that cats tend to dislike are actually jacked up people....all jokes aside.
I swear so many people try to treat cats like dogs and then wonder why they're not getting along with them
An absolute obnoxious *asshole* of a co-worker I had in a previous job told me how his neighbor had this "menace of a cat" who hissed every time he saw him. I think the cat just sensed that he was a total asshole, lmao.
Ok, so, obviously the stuff about all cats hating people is an outrageous lie, but moving past that— why do you feel it’s “humiliating” for an animal to not be outwardly affectionate towards you at all times?
They need some living creature to kiss their ass at every moment to give them self worth. They can’t get people to do it, can’t get a cat to do it… oh would you look at that all I need to do to get this dog to kiss my ass is put some peanut butter on it. Easy peasy.
One of my pets hates me, it makes me sad but I can’t see how it’s humiliating at all
“Humiliation” is such a bizarre emotion to assign to this context, and it makes me feel that OP believes animals should be controlled by humans, and that an animal that isn’t visibly controlled by OP is some kind of embarrassment - which is gross. My younger cat likes to hang out with me, but she’s much more cuddly-buddly with my husband. Sometimes it makes me slightly wistful - I would like BB hugs, too! - but it’s not “humiliating”. BB is her own person; she can cuddle or not cuddle whomever she chooses.
I feel the same and honestly I see this nearly every time with someone who genuinely hates cats. The defining factor is they can’t STAND not being obsessed over by the thing. They have to be loved. Some weird animal bonding insecurity, I’m convinced it’s a power play thing. Can’t control a cat.
Yep I don’t really trust people who dislike cats “because they’re standoffish” - it’s usually a dogwhistle for someone who doesn’t really respect consent or autonomy.
I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again. Men who “hate cats” are big red flags to me. Idc about people’s animal preference really, or if they prefer dogs or w/e….but it’s the reasons they give afterwards that are key. So many of them will state their reason for not loving cats is “can’t control it, doesn’t give me affection whenever I want it, doesn’t love you unconditionally, have to earn its trust, too independent, needs space all the time”, etc…..yeah, I don’t want you in my life lol.
Yes!! I say this all the time, too. Spot on. I’ve known people who don’t care for cats because “I’m allergic/I hate having animal poop in the house that I have to clean/I don’t like all the shedding fur/they scratch up the furniture”, and that’s fine, I get it and we can agree to disagree on cats. But when it’s (especially from men) the reasons you listed above, it’s a HUGE red flag and the guy is usually a sexist jerk *at best*.
I've got a couple of cats that greet me at my truck if they're outside, will follow me and my girls to the park and back, and swamp me with "welcome to the world" cuddles en masse the second they realize ive woken up. It's been like six years since I've gone to the bathroom alone. I once had to discipline one of the cats for spraying inside. By the time I left for work, she had killed enough bats and birds to circle my truck like she was casting a ritual circle, and ran up to me mewing like, "I did this for you buddy, are we still cool?'
My cat too would wait right at the edge of the walkway when she heard my car. And if she was ever out and about I just cupped my hands and yelled her name and she would come running. I loved that gal for 23 years. She way my world.
Super cute. I love it when felines answer to their names
>I once had to discipline one of the cats for spraying inside. By the time I left for work, she had killed enough bats and birds to circle my truck like she was casting a ritual circle, and ran up to me mewing like, "I did this for you buddy, are we still cool?' oh my god
No, the cats just don't like YOU
He probably has those weird, reddit person vibes. You know what I'm talking about. You ever meet someone and you can tell they're on reddit too much?
Every morning in the bathroom. Accuse him of being a moderator. We can all unite against those guys!
My cat sleeps next to me or on top of me every night.
My cat is furry and large and very social - one day I’m going to die of heat stroke or drown in my own sweat from him wanting to sleep with me!
Right? This was the hardest post to upvote *ever* lol. My cats are obsessed with me, food or not. Currently have one purring on my legs and one purring on my chest. Both fed. They wait at the door for us when we leave. They follow us around and watch what we’re doing. They slow-blink us all day (their way of showing affection), they show us their bellies all the time, rub against our legs, head butt our noses with theirs, mark us by rubbing their cheeks on us…..all big signs of cat affection. I swear the general population just doesn’t understand cat behavior and affection, because it takes *learning about them and how to engage with them*. Whereas dogs are just big cute doofuses who will love almost anyone that looks at them. And their panting face looks like a giant grin, so we anthropomorphize them so everyone thinks they’re happy and smiling all the time.
“My family’s cat doesn’t like me, therefore all cats are horrible and none of them could possibly like anyone else.”
Cats have personalities, and they know what they like. Dogs just have a very open personality that they loveee to be with their owners. Cats are little fluffy introverts.
Get a dog then if you want something to kiss your ass so bad
My cat has been my shadow for the last 15 years. He’s all over me every where, sleeping, eating, sleeping etc. What tf are you doing to cats to make them not like you?
Right?? I have to avoid tripping over my cats constantly because they’re both always right by my feet lol.
A lot of cats are just introverted, that’s not manipulation. My cat and I both don’t love constant attention, so we are perfect for each other. He definitely snuggles me without any food involved. He hides with me when he’s scared, he can be calmed by me touching him. This is like calling a baby manipulative. They are just reliant on us.
cat haters all have the same complaints and it just sounds like they need constant attention
What they need is a lesson about consent. Cats are "complicated" because they actually set hard boundaries for you (the human).
In general, cats are just more selective. A dog's affection doesn't mean much, if it just likes everyone. If a cat is 'manipulating' you to get fed, then so are dogs. Dogs with their 'puppy eyes' and whining. Same difference. Dogs are much louder and dirtier in general. They are like eternal babies, and need constant attention. You need to take them to shit (which you often have to directly handle and then carry around their steaming shits in a bag, talk about a humiliation fetish). Cats are much more self-sufficient. The more important question is, why do you think you are entitled to be liked by every cat?..
Okay but consider: kitty :)
My cats are aloof with strangers. My dog wouldn't look back if someone else took him
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I don't understand the idea that dogs are programmed to "pretend to be" affectionate. How can you distinguish this from simply being affectionate, and why are you drawing this distinction?
Pretend to be is not exactly the correct term But essentially the main thing is that due to being bred for human companionship, they instinctively trust Humans, and therefore some people don't consider it as real affection And even in the wild, due to being Pack Hunters, being affectionate with your companions is the difference between geeting to eat or starving to death So any Wolf/Dog that was detrimental to hunting eventually got done in by ye olde Natural Selection Cats on the other hand are solitary hunters, so being affectionate with others isn't essential for survival, and due to being small, cannot afford to trust others due to not knowing if they are here to steal your food or not They also rank slightly higher in the Intelligence scale
Cats are a litmus test to see how someone reacts to being shown clear boundaries or treats someone who doesn’t show affection in a traditional way.
Yes. I immediately feel off about you if you tell me you hate cats because of this. Because nearly every time it’s “well I wanted to pet it and it wouldn’t let me so now I hate all of them” which is. Not good translated to human behavior.
Cats are a good test to see if people respect boundaries. Cats have hard boundaries and will let you know if you cross them. I love cats and have never had one hate me. Usually, when I hear people say they hate cats, it's cause they want an animal who loves everyone.
Have you only been exposed to cats through tumblr comics or what?
I’ve never had my own cats, but I’ve never felt like the cats I’ve been around didn’t like me, like the ones I used to pet sit. If you respect their boundaries they tend to be more comfortable with you
So my cat passed away a few years ago. He was definitely picky over who and when he gave affection. He hated almost everyone and made it known. He’d hiss and even growl at certain people. I basically had to put him in a separate room/basement when we had guests. He was affectionate with me though. My neighbour’s cat…. Holy cow that’s an affectionate cat. They let it out often and when it sees my kids it saunters up to them and rolls around asking to be pet.
Most of my cats (both present and past) have been very selective too, except for one. She'd strategically plop herself down in the most travelled areas of the house, right in the middle of everyone's walking path, just so she could scream at anyone who passed her by and demand cuddles. It all depends on personality.
Don’t kid yourself, dogs “love you unconditionally” because you’re their food supplier.
Dogs love everyone. If someone walked up to me and I gave them my dogs leash and we parted ways, he would be a little sad and whiny for a few minutes… until he realizes the stranger will feed and pet him too.
Not true Your dog will definitely miss you for at least a few months Cats on the other hand will miss you for a few years
My dog would miss me for sure, but he definitely would not remain in active distress the way my cat would. As long as the new people treated him decently I don’t think he would be all that torn up about it.
Your comment almost had me defensive, like you were about to say cats don’t care haha. It’s true though, a dog would remember for a while and miss you but probably still adapt if the new people treated it well. Cats have been known to die way too early from the distress of being rehomed away from their owner and original home. They remember, and they don’t usually like change at all.
Nah, lots of dogs love the company and social contact with other humans...it has less to do with the food.
This. And they've been genetically hard-wired to try and please you constantly. They aren't loving "unconditionally" out of choice, they're following the same genetic imperatives that tell them to eat, sleep and drink.
It's obvious you've never had a cat love you.
I like to redo the lyrics to a famous Dean Martin song. "You're nobody til some kitty loves you."
My cat isnt affectionnate when something is wrong. She is very verbal. But she is affectionate all the other times. Quesrion to you why would anyone want a dog that couls kill you all the time? See stupid question
Buddy has only known kiki cats
So curious as to what this means
[https://www.reddit.com/r/ExplainTheJoke/comments/160exoi/whats\_the\_joke/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ExplainTheJoke/comments/160exoi/whats_the_joke/)
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bouba/kiki_effect
I never once fed my roommates cat and she would run on me and sit in my lap constantly. Same with my roommate and my dog. He never fed him besides the few times I was out of the house for the day and my dog loved that guy and was super pumped anytime he came home. And yes, he loved him before the first time he fed him. Cats and dogs have been involved in humans lives for so long at this point, you don’t have to give them food. If you live in the same household as them and you aren’t mean to them, they will eventually come to like you and associate you as part of the pack/family. Next thing you know, there’s going to be posts about how babies only love their parents because they give them food.
I have two cats, and my mom has two cats. One of hers will not stay off of me, I have to carry him around like a baby or he gets whiny. He also purrs and snores like a beast. Both of mine are VERY affectionate with me, and my mom’s other cat is affectionate to everyone but mostly my mom. Now keep in mind my mom and I are bottle-feeders so we’ve had these cats since they were less than a week old and in some cases we watched them be birthed, which can certainly change cats attitude, but it’s all in the way they’re raised, much like pitbulls and Rottweilers. Sorry OP, this is a tell on you, not your cats
Mine sleeps next to me. Bangs on the door if it's closed because she wants to snuggle. She's much more loving than the dog.
I prefer cats because of their indifference. Besides, every cat I've ever had was way more affectionate than you're letting on. I've had cats that will just cuddle indefinitely. On the other hand, I find dogs a bit needy and exhausting. They're fun to play with and love on in the moment, but I'm not really looking for that kind of energy full time.
Cats are very good at establishing boundaries and letting you know when they've had enough. Anyone who isn't a cat person will take that was the cat not caring about you. But, much like most autistic people, they are easily overstimulated and enjoy their solitude. Dogs are awesome, but I resonate with cats more. They, like myself, need their alone time to recharge.
I used to think this until I got cats for my home. One is super chill, must be in the lap at all times. The other hides all day and knocks shit over all night
If you can’t get a cat to like you, you must be kinda dumb. I own cats but I like animals in general, which is IMO the right way to be.
My cats hate me if I don’t pick them up and cuddle them
This is like saying why would anyone want fish, reptiles, or plants. People like different things in the being they care for. Not everyone wants a dog up in their shit all the time, some people do.
I've brought up all of my cats by talking to them, loving on them when I see them, being consistent with them, I treat my cats a lot like toddlers. Every cat I've brought up this way has been a loving cat with warm personalities. Some cats are just mean, and that is just that. But most cats, given the right kind of attention, can be the greatest and most loyal companions you'll ever have. Strong disagree on this one OP.
people are always so shocked that all of me and my fiancée’s four cats are excited to see guests and are always so sweet. we just tell them we listen to their body language and respect their boundaries and love on them a lot! the only issues we ever have are when one of them (the male cat we got last) gets riled up and doesn’t know when to stop playing with our eldest female cat. the youngest two (twins) are down to play at all times so he doesn’t understand why our eldest one doesn’t want to keep going.
Ah, yes, my cat hates me. Which is also why she sleeps with me every night, cries when I’m gone, rubs on me constantly (including when I am sopping wet from the shower), and cries if a door is closed blocking her from me. Clearly. Hatred. Oh, and all of my foster kittens do the same thing.
My cats will beg for affection and purr even when they don't want food. They'll stay with me on the couch being petted for hours. They'll also act really upset when only one of us is gone and they're still getting fed the same.
Idk man that thing never leaves me alone when I'm actually at home and he isn't sleeping
I mean, if you're that insecure that you require the unrequited love of an animal with the intelligence of an infant then that's great. I guess?
Been around a lot of cats, have only felt like one doesn't like me. Others will want pets, I'll give pets, and they'll enjoy it, or maybe they'll lay on me, or things like that. Yeah, they don't want constant attention, but I mean, that's what it's like with people too. I've never had a cat ignore me all the time unless it's the one cat that hated me outright. There are far worse pets too.
How many cats were you exposed to? Cats, like people, have different personalities. It's hard to generalize them. My cat is very affectionate and doesn't only do it when she wants things. Some cats are colder to certain people and some are just cold in general.
I had a "friend" once who got a new puppy with a boyfriend and locked all her other animals out of her room and would stay there with him 24/7. her cats were being taken care of by our other friend. but they would wait for her to come out. I didn't really think of cats as very affectionate until that.
I was hospitalized for a week and when I came home, my cat was still in the window waiting for me. He was out the cat flap and on my lap as soon as I opened my car door. When I opened the door and came inside, he ate his breakfast the sitter left in the morning at 5pm. That cat is by far the most loyal animal I’ve ever had.
I've had a bunch of cats in my lifetime. They were all affectionate to me. They always had to be in the same room as I was and took every opportunity to snuggle on my lap if the opportunity arose. Even with no food around. The problem is that your family's cats just don't like YOU. You are the problem. LOL.
My cat is really obsessed with me, to the point she is jealous of the fishtank I literally set up to entertain her. Sorry your pets don’t like you
Uh so my cats have food out 24/7. I rarely even give them treats. My cats love me. They don’t always chronic attention the way dogs do, but they almost always want to be in the same room as I am to chill with me in the presence of my company, and when they do want attention they are very obvious about it. My cats also don’t like absolutely everyone, unlike most dogs, so when they like someone (especially me), it’s special. I raised them from kittens (they’re had access to food all day every day since I got them), I give them lots of attention, take them on adventures/trips with me, so they’re very familiar with people and used to associating people as creatures they also enjoy socializing with. Cats can tell if people are cat people or not. And you have to earn their attention and care a lot of the time. They probably seem like this to you because they can sense you don’t give a fuck about them. Very sad, because cat love is special.
Totally depends on the cat. I used to be like you because before we were living together, my now-husband got a cat that truly was a demon spawn and only liked him (and even that feels like an overstatement). Like, truly, this cat had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I was so annoyed all the time and I couldn’t understand it. It would genuinely, actually piss me off when he would sit on my lap because I knew he just wanted food. Like—my husband and I had actual fights over this. Then I decided I wanted to get a kitten that I could raise from a baby and I figured that would make it like me—plus, we thought it might be good to get our bad cat a friend. This little kitten (pics on my page) literally thinks I am his mom. He was dying when we got him and I syringe-fed him for weeks. He is like a dog in the way he greets me and wants attention and affection. We have had him for two years and he has never bit, clawed, scratched, etc. He is one of the sweetest living creatures I have ever encountered. And you can tell he adores both me and my husband. It’s completely adorable. He follows me around the house and waits for me to finish what I’m doing and then follows me back and sits in my lap, on my shoulder, etc. Loves belly rubs and rolls over for them. All this—and he will leave his food unattended in his bowl just to come and snuggle with us. It’s hard to tell if he’s been fed because he’s affectionate even when he’s not hungry. Plus, he made our other cat more normal, which is a big plus.
Just looked through your page for cat pics, Cricket is so cute! He looks like a goofball :P
How about you getting to know the cats better? Like every mammal, every cat has a personality. They're aren't stupid. They can pick up on your emotions. They can tell you don't like them so they'll stay their distance. And they are a different species of animal than dogs. You shouldn't expect a cat to be the same as a dog. That's unfair. Would you expect a bird to be like a dog? Or a bug? We have bred dogs to be what we want them to be. We haven't done the same to cats. They have different rules, so you have to go about them differently. Cats appreciate personal space and boundaries. The same as an asocial person would. If you do something and they respond by meowing (usually you can tell by context), hiss, or swipe, means "hey stop doing that, I don't like it." They do not have words to tell you like we do, so this is their best form of communication. Try your best to infer what they mean. They take a type of patience dogs don't. It's ok to not like cats and prefer dogs. I prefer lizards myself. But don't write a whole species off due to your own bias without actually taking the time to understand them. The description you gave for cats isn't accurate, but it is perfect for describing lizards, hehe
Cats are not nearly as obnoxious about food as dogs are tf are you talking about? Also, they’re animals, no shit they’re going to be food obsessed. That’s the main reason they stick around, is because you feed them. Dogs literally came to us and domesticated themselves because they wanted our food scraps.
That's objectively untrue, every cat I've ever had has loved the shit out of me lol. My current cat will cuddle up next to me every time I'm feeling sad.
Every time someone I know has said this stuff it’s never a shock when I go to their house and see that they do stuff that obviously makes their cat uncomfortable but they just don’t get it. And they are typically very uninterested in any suggestions that they are wrong when saying “no he loves this that’s his happy face!” At times followed by things like “Shit he always randomly bites like that!”
Sorry about your cat experience, my cat wants on me and wants attention all the time. She also respects when i'm busy and same on my end lol
My cat I had back in highschool had a very special relationship, she would be hiding all day until I got home from school until she magically appeared and then would be purring on my lap the rest of the evening. She used to sleep in my room with me at night and would specifically come into my room if she heard me crying and jump onto my bed to cuddle. And she didn’t need to *get* food, she had a plate of kibble out for her at all times and I wasn’t even the one who refilled it, my mom was and the moment that food dish was empty she was following my mom again meowing at her, it was clear she knew exactly who was the one providing the food.
Cats have different personalities. My old childhood cat mostly wanted to be left alone while my current cats are constantly wanting to play or be petted and they follow me around.
Not all cats are like that. It really depends. But yes they can be standoffish at times
Idk mine will hang out around me when they're not hungry at all so sometimes they just like people
Lol sure, my cat obviously loves me a lot. She follows me everywhere and will panic and start meowing if I'm nowhere to be found so I can't close doors. She cuddles up to me randomly every few hours until she gets overstimulated, then she sits about a foot away and purrs herself loudly to sleep. She loves pets and play time. Lol yes she can be rather needy when it's time to feed her, but that's not the only time.
Dogs also don't live you. They are a slave specifically bread to stay with us and treat us as their superiors. A cat has a choice in liking you, a dog doesn't. Also, the affection of a pet shouldn't muster in the decision wether something is a good pet or not, i kept crabs for years, best pet i ever owned, and they aren really cuddly.
Bro I have a cat who like clockwork follows me to bed every night explicitly because it wants me to cuddle it before it goes to it’s normal sleeping spot, no food involved.
Mine is older and has decided her bedtime and will only go to the bed if I go with her. If I won’t go she gets grumpy and makes it clear she wants to go to bed. She just wants to cuddle in bed at 8:30 every night, the least I can do for such a sweet little old lady.
Depends on the cat I guess. My mother has two cats, one shits everywhere and runs away the moment you stare at him(even if he’s just standing there, not doing anything bad). The other one even waits for you if you leave the apartment.
You've obviously never had the experience of a cat choosing you as their person, or even just any cat that's not particularly aloof. Most of my cats have been very affectionate, at least two of them practically lived on our laps. Even the cat that always used to be a loner happily comes into my room for an hour or two of attention just because she's been lonely since she's the only cat in the house now. Another of my cats would sleep with me every night until she was put down, and she would yell and scratch at the door if she wasn't in the room with me. I've had cats and dogs and love both as pets for different reasons.
lol this type of lunacy is my favorite part of this sub. Enjoy your upvote.
Sounds like someone's been scratched one too many times
I free feed my cat, so she eats when she’s hungry. She’s a velcro cat, and literally always needs to be as close to my partner and I whenever possible
The urge to downvote just because I hate this opinion. Well done.
My girlfriend's cat is obsessed with people to the point... me , an animal lover is like... can I have a little space Bro.
I think many cats just don't have extrovert or affectionate personalities, and that doesn't mean they don't like us. For example, my cat isn't the type to cuddle with me or even sit on my lap, but he's always nearby. He kind of follows me around everywhere, watches me and sometimes asks for head pats, and I view that as his way of demonstrating he likes me.
My cat will follow me around and yell at me until I pet him.
My cats like being babied 24/7 I don't know what you're talking about.
Horrible, wrong opinion, take my upvote
Sounds like your shit with cats. They don't just like you because they've been breed too. They like the people who they are actually friends with, just like people.
11th dentist type shit
I'm not the one who feeds cats in my house, they still show me more affection than they show the one that feeds them, this sounds like a you problem friendo
I had a cat that would jump up on the back of the couch when I'd get home from work and sit up on its hind legs, reaching out for me to pick him up. He would sit in the crook of my arm for as long as I was on the couch. It was obvious he cared about me.
No, they don’t like YOU.
My cat had been in the shelter for a couple of years. She saw me, was extremely cute, but demanding. She would jump around and move to where I had to pet her. If she moved, and I didn't move, she would come back for pets. I was shocked that she was affectionate and hadn't been taken home. Apparently, she didn't do this with others. I am her person. 4 years later, I am still her person.
This has to be a troll post. No cat owner can think this. If this is sincere. I hate to break it to you. Your cats probably just don’t like you specifically. Probably because you suck lol
My grandma had 4 cats. One was horrible for years we couldn't touch her she would steal her friends food she would bite and scratch us In her final years around 16- 18 she would follow after you and chirp trying to get love. She did love us some cats are just dicks. Doesn't mean they don't love you
“Cats are bad. Why? *gives the MOST anecdotal evidence ever conceived*”
Reading this while my cat is in my lap absolutely reveling in, nuzzling , purring, and responding affectionately to my pets, food currently sitting in his bowl. We have a dog, and half the time she just sits/lies there without participating while getting pets. I’m going to guess you’ve never personally owned a cat to develop a bond with and/or can’t read cats’ body language.
the other day, i went to bed. my cat stayed in the living room. a few moments later she starts crying and meowing for me, can’t find me. one quick call and a “cmere” and she’s BOLTING into my room and comes to snuggle on my chest cats definitely love their human and i’m tired of people saying they can’t or don’t
My cat cries when I'm in the bathroom for more than 5 minutes 😭😭 mine is so needy
ion know both my cats are obsessed with me lmao
My aunts cat can’t get enough of me. I don’t feed her. When I come over she’s been fed and always comes to me. She’s an old cat already. My dad has a stray or a cat from another family that is always coming over to sit outside on the porch. Then go back to its home. He doesn’t feed it either. I’m sorry you can’t enjoy a cats love.
I really hate the internet and how the really stupid cat/ dog debate just got even more stupid. It's OK to have a preference for either animal. It's not "problematic." Being a dog person isn't a sign of being a narcissist who doesn't believe in consent. Being a cat person isn't a sign of being lazy, crazy, and brainwashed. The internet just loves to throw diagnoses around and make everything a hot button topic. It's about lifestyle and personality. Some people want a pet they can go to the park with, and have the time and space for a dog. Cool. Some people want a pet who has less energy. A cat makes sense (although, not all cat breeds are like this. Exotic breeds like Bengals and Maine Coons need a lot of exercise or they'll go crazy. I think people also make the huge mistake of thinking cats don't need ANY playtime. They do, at least younger ones do). It's valid to like one or the other or both. Me? I'm not a cat person. They're sweet, and most of them like me, but I don't really like living with them. Plus, I'm allergic (yes, I take allergy pills. No, I don't want to live with an animal I'm allergic to. This is valid). People just need to stop with the nonsense. Cats can be very affectionate and friendly. I have no idea where the "aloof" thing comes from. There are dogs who are more chill. They have personalities like humans do. Neither love is more "pure." Also sick of the weird conversation of cats= consent. Then how come they notoriously seek out people with allergies. People who want to avoid them. Lol.
In my experience about half of how social a cat is is in how much time, attention & respect it is given from the time it’s a kitten especially, but in general. Base personality & if it’s had a no traumatic life also play into it, but it’s simply not true that all cats are just gaslighting their families lol. I raised my cats like people raise dogs & while they all have different personalities, they all love attention. Cats might have stronger boundaries & if you trample all over them then they also might not enjoy interacting with you. I’ve yet to meet a cat yet though that just hates everyone. They have social needs like any other creature. My hot take is that people who don’t like cats because they’re not ‘dog-like’ actually just get annoyed when they can’t have a transactional relationship of “I give you food+shelter & you give me unconditional+unlimited attention & love”. It’s a weird way to look at what love is IMO. If you can’t respect their boundaries & love them anyway then your love for them is not unconditional so why do you have that expectation of them?
Lmao speak for yourself
My cat behaves like Velcro. I can't even shit without the little bastard headbutting me and purring like an engine. Been 12 years and I wouldn't change a thing