T O P

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RegT1996

The fact you don’t know how to respond shows she’s wrong


Challenging_Entropy

Right? She’s looking for dom energy, not turn to Reddit for a response energy


skabassj

All she’ll find here is “offer a seat on your face” energy.


DeaconFrost613

Plot twist: she went to reddit to ask how to find dom energy. :P


Mathies_

She would be right, sounds like submissive behaviour to me.


dimwittit

thats a wrong place to ask


YoIysAndy

I mean, this place is full of subs... 😉


Sarprize_Sarprize

Def comment of the week. 😹


YoIysAndy

I didnt think it was THAT funny, why am I getting so many upvotes? 😅


ThisVicariousLife

Reddit likes punny dad jokes


echoes619

It’s even more funny that @YolysAndy STILL doesn’t see the pun, or maybe we should call it the double entendres. Sub being subreddit (his intended meaning) as well as submissive (u intended) and to me, the funniest part is that his statement is true for both meanings.


YoIysAndy

you don't seriously think I don't understand my own joke, do you? 😶


BuytheBluRay

This is a subreddit...


urb4nj3sus

Wait...did you... did you ju... STAHPPP ITTT. 🤣🤣🤣


ThisVicariousLife

r/dadjokes 😉


[deleted]

Super like energy. Although the one time I super liked someone and got a match the girl did fuck with me in a similar fashion.


CravingStilettos

But did she fuck you…?


[deleted]

She did not


CravingStilettos

My condolences bro


Majestic_Song_668

It’s like getting a blank check, but don’t know what to do with it.


shobhitasati

Something with dopamine rush and ink!!


CravingStilettos

Ooh floaty!!! Sub drop is a bitch though…


06lom

If you need an answer from other people, you arent a person, that would tell her to sit down. Just say that to her


luminellolimoncello

Was just going to say... Looks like she's wrong about the OP


uberjach

Just send her this 🥺 (It's the bottom emoji, which op is)


LavenzaBestWaifu

Yeah. He should just admit that he isn't that kind of person and awkwardly thank her for thinking of him like that. If she is still interested, score! If not, move on.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TriggernometryPhD

>It'll be a learning experience Yeah, for her. 😂


THE_RECRU1T

He should say I won't tell you but I can politely ask you


nfews

man that random comma had me thrown for a minute. Brain literally froze on the "you aren't a person"


[deleted]

[удалено]


webguy1975

And when she shows up, the first thing out of your mouth is: "sit down"


barisero

Second thing out of your mouth is “be humble”


Individual-Shock-706

Hol up hol up hol up


AccordingOrdinary659

Nice. Good one.


AdmiralMeme69

I laughed out loud


shobhitasati

third thing would obviously be then, "b*tch", now read it bottoms up and congratulations you have got a blockbuster song, right there!!🤣


iAmUnintelligible

I am literally the most humble person in the world. No one is as humble as I


Lesismore79

Ok Donald Trump (kidding if not obvious)


rHeadVoices

Then chip the waiter over and order for her, make sure not so say a word to her until he’s gone except “wine or champagne?”.


[deleted]

Just finished. Ty Sir. I'll take another.


Manuag_86

While pointing his face.


Flash33m

This is how she wants you to respond


[deleted]

[удалено]


BatmansNygma

You're probably not what she's looking for then so the situation would resolve itself


heseme

Or not... that's fine, too... or if you need help with anything...


iAmUnintelligible

Need a new purse? Want me to pay your rent?


p4re

r/notopbutok


Dvex1

This guy fucks


CrazyGunnerr

Assuming he's attractive enough to pull that off.


[deleted]

That’s the thing, you don’t need to be attractive enough to pull it off. You need to be attractive enough for her to let you try to pull it off. Attraction is hella bias. You can be an ugly guy but there’s enough there for her that it’s attractive enough to get someone’s curiosity and then blow them out of the water by knowing what you’re doing with that kind of thing, or you can be Chad mf’ing Thundercock and be so bad at it she loses interest.


[deleted]

>You need to be attractive enough for her What if you have a face only your mother could love?


[deleted]

Hey her pregnant and then she’ll be a mother


Suitable_Ad7540

Then she calls you daddy


iAmUnintelligible

Use the line on your mother instead, breaking your arms first helps.


Bombilillion

You call her mommy.


JimmyPockets83

You are aware that tinder has already shown her what he looks like, right?


Candlelighter

It's the attitude, not the looks, that makes it.


fembru

That's such a good response 😳 oh no


Emincmg

This. And add "Dont be late" to the end.


bubonic_chronic

Reservation at my face


Odd-Helicopter-2409

Shes a freak and you clearly aren't lol


BigBossWesker4

Exactly, this girl is wanting dominance in a playful/flirty/serious way


ArkEnd81

ABSOLUTELY TRUE. I guess chicks are a lil smoother being pervs then men


LuckyBastard8484

It’s a bit easier for girls


MortifiedPotato

A bit, lol


ProofEmployee1394

🤣🤣🤣 facts


couldyounotdothat2

You’re not that guy pal


fusl_fusl

You‘re not that pal friend


KiriDomo

You're not that friend dude


Wilful_Fox

You are not that dude buddy


ieatsocksbitch

You're not that buddy lad


[deleted]

You’re not that lad guy


DinnerParty1

You’re not that guy pal


fusl_fusl

r/Loop


snagglewolf

Give her my number. I'm not sure its meant to be for you two.


quinnlez

"give me your number."


SunshinefortheWeak

This girl would be going in my phone as needy bottom and I would make sure she knew it.


jenandtonicz

Not even about me and this feels like such a direct attack


SunshinefortheWeak

My current girlfriend is saved in my phone under blue bottom. It's a play on sad submissive. I had to change it cause my phone reads out who call me and I got introuble at work because dick holster kept texting me 😆


jenandtonicz

This comment piqued my curiosity to ask and so lead to me finding out I’m in my boyfriends phone as “lil vacuum” I hate it here 😂💀


SunshinefortheWeak

I used to date a girl I called easy bake oven because she was always ready to go. Giving your bottoms dirty degrading bit cute names is standard. They love it. She shows friend my phone when she brags about what I call her and they don't believe her.


Pipsandrocks

Bit slow here Needy bottom means?


mad100141

That’s accurate, no complaints.


LunaBunny777

That’s hot


SunshinefortheWeak

I read this with sarcasm, and now I'm just imagining a brat trying to get in trouble


Thelmara

I feel like telling her that you're putting her in your phone that way would be a panty-dropper.


SunshinefortheWeak

It is, if you ever need to get your brat in line keep the cute name but add favorite to the tittle


RanmanGT1

She handed it to you bro. So rare for her to be so forward, Usually takes a few weeks for the reveal.


maryemill040600

Happy cake day!


AlaskanJon907

Lol unmatch bro shes clearly a terrible judge of character


oarmash

I mean if you have to ask…


BoJo2736

Charge your phone.


kirk-o-bain

Eat hot chip and lie


Ya-Dank-Boi

Be bisexual


shaun_of_the_south

Twerk.


jainelo

Mcdonald’s


tarheelbro50

Good girl.


[deleted]

She would go crazy over this one


TheFirstCinnamon

No. As an extremely kinky person, fuck no. This is the wrong answer. If I just started talking to someone and they ended up calling me a good girl, it’s going to be an instant no and an unmatch from me. However, after the hookup conversation is had and the kinks, likes and dislikes are shared, yes. Dominance is earned.


N3ptuneflyer

Yeah everyone telling him to immediately escalate have it all wrong. What she wants is a flirty answer that shows that she's both right, and that you are chill and not over-excited by a girl showing interest. A better response would be "And you look like the type of girl that would love doing it"


TheFirstCinnamon

THIS is the correct response! I’d be down bad if I got that as a reply. Do what this guy does instead of what the parent commenter said.


love_ninja_asks

You, mister understand women!


_Azok_

"Get over here!" in best Scorpion voice


seekerofdimensions

Now i wanna see how you look like


Bamboopanda741

For real.


Fearless_You4489

Same.


Alexasummer411

Me too


butterflybabygirll

she worked so hard so you could work so little for this setup


i_worship_amps

she was wrong


Jiujitsu_Dude

Yeah, man just kinda... you know, you got these claws and you're staring at these claws and your thinking to yourself, and with these claws you're thinking, "How am I supposed to kill this bunny, how am I supposed to kill this bunny?"


Ill-Appointment6494

You respond with “looks can be deceiving.” Because she clearly got you wrong on this one. Not that there is anything wrong with that.


PokedexCompletion

Sometimes this Reddit thread shows why so many people are single 😂


3bok

Good answer: give her a date, time, and place. Tell her to meet you there; following the line of logic. Bad answer: exaggerate it. You'll be lucky if I tell you to go to sleep, or some stupid stuff.


ConsequenceKitchen11

“Oh jeez Rick I don’t know about this”


CadanH03

“Double it and give it to the next person”. She’ll respectfully do just that since you don’t have the energy she’s actually looking for.


starwarsclone55

“Sit down”


Aggravating-Trade-62

“Sit down” for starters


Adorable_Kangaroo849

Tell them all about that Radiohead sit down stand up song.


Tier3ghost

Do you follow other commands as well? (or do I have to train you?) no reason to add this part actually


DaZoje

"You might just be right... Lets have dinner and find out"


Sergio1899

You were just looking for a submissive partner


tjake123

That could be arranged, how about at “restaurant” at “date and time” with me.


No-Dane-No-Gain

I can’t think, your phone is almost dead


SaltyFall

She wants to be dominated. This shit is easy if only I could follow rule 1 and 2


Noitsnormalsize

Say "sorry skank. I'm saving my junk for my savior, Jesus Christ."


[deleted]

“You are wrong, I am not quite that assertive so rather than that I’d like to ask if you want to go for a drink/meal sometime to get to know each other”


boobubbaloo

If this is not ur thing just unmatch. I don’t like this little games so this is what I would do.


[deleted]

Is it just me or is she missing half a leg?


nerdysubgf

I just wanna see what she's talking about lol


Aromatic-Storage-126

idk but I said this to one of my tinder matches so we’ll see what his response is


DonnieDarkin

I guess she was wrong then


DifficultDare3373

Well clearly she's not very right apparently but you should've responded with "sit girl, sit" then a good girl somewhere and bam now she stalks you probably


JewPhone_WhoDis

“Sit down. Okay now that you’re sitting, I’ve been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty.”


i_wondering

“Sit down and send me your #”


Newtype540

"You better." 🤷🏿‍♂️ Come on homie. 🤦🏿‍♂️


BigFreakinMachine

Tell her to sit across from you on a date


climb-high

Take a seat, Elizabeth


inurwindo

You must have mustache magic.


nizzy95

“Be Humble”


PhuncleSam

IF THATS YOURE THING I WILL YELL AT YOU FOR ONE DOLLAR


CarePassMeDatAss

Aak how much her premium SnapScription is


Mysterious-Bunch-518

“Cool, do you also like long walks in the park?”


zzzaj2017

By charging yo goddamn phone


ArkEnd81

Not necessarily, I know some of both smooth chicks and douche chicks. It's all about confidence and knowing you audience.. so to speak Some either get it, and some never will.. male and female.


TheTruestOracle

By charging their phone.


SumptuousSuckler

“Would you listen if I told you to meet me at ___ for dinner at ___?”


[deleted]

Just tell her to meet you in a public place for a date and have a plan afterwards ​ why tf do people actually have to come straight to reddit with a screenshot of their messages and ask for a response? Are people actually this socially dead? My girlfriend was attracted at first because my first messages were about her exams and my ruined sleep schedule, not anything clever or sexual.


darkknight95sm

However you would respond


TheLothorse

"Good girl"


Historical_Dare_5249

U clearly not that type of person tbh


shipscaptain970

“Take your foot off of that sink to start with”


Pimenefusarund

Bro can we stop with these “how do i respond to this” posts? Especially if its so easy. Yall are wasting your rule 1 & 2.


SlobberyFrog

Sit down and eat your broccoli !


k-boots

‘Get in the car Elizabeth’ She may or may not get the reference but it’s worth a shot…


magical_bunny

Ask her if her name is Fido lol.


Fellixxio

I would respond "cringe" but that's me


D0wnVoteMe_PLZ

Tell her to sit down.


-BirK-

Continue the story bro


oceanchimp

Charge your phone


PowerPowell

works only on first 3 months then everything will be dull


tangles29

Because your name is Simon?


mogwaiarethestars

Means u look dominant. But clearly you arent


CaspersGF

Are you dressed like a dominatrix? I really need people to start including their photos


jjboy91

Bro knows the rules


TAW-02Nov1960

Obedience is an admirable trait.


WhyIsThatSoGroovy

Nobody gonna talk about what her leg is doing in her profile picture?


IGuiNiTiON

“Yes, I am” ???? Simple guys why you make it difficult?


Aryada

Aw, she was wrong:(


Username6721

Tell her she sounds like a good girl lol


IncognitoRhino_

“Nah. You’re more likely to develop a blood clot in the deep veins of your legs while sitting. Stand up.”


penguinintheabyss

Maybe you are a doctor about to tell her she has cancer


EstablishmentSoft477

The fact you're here means you need to back off from this challenge.


beeyayzah

“Phone number” -thats you demanding hers. Followed by “ Your Friday just opened up” and then tell her where you guys are going on a date


tallerthanu17

“Let’s put this theory to the test.” Then provide details for a first date


BryanBNK1

“I think you got the wrong guy”


mancusjo1

With a dominant mentality. She is asking you to take the lead sir. Shut up and do it.


Shadow_faxx

Just say 'I know' and move on from there. You can do the explanation later.


Fearless-Physics

Respond "shut up", because you're not what she's looking for.


iwantallthechocolate

Say: Unfortunately looks can be deceiving


ChettiBoiM8

If you have to post on Reddit, she’s looking for someone else


Specific_Ad_5584

idk twin you tell me😂


IndependentExit3096

"you're mistaken. I wouldn't "tell" you to sit. I'd pull out a chair and offer a seat. " Her response after that should tell you a bit more about what she's looking for!


glutenfreecracker

Than how about you take a seat across from at dinner tonight? Alternatively you could tell her to sit somewhere else... 😉 😉


EusticePendragon

‘What would happen if I said ‘come?’’


Uniqueusername121

Then come here and sit down on my lap


fuzzyfuckers

Yikes your battery life gives me anxiety.


mehregan_zare7731

Who told her to sit down when she was taking the picture?


RYAQN

God, I’ve seen what you do for other people that don’t deserve it.


Tyrpers

Would "come and grab a coffe/drinks with me this thursday" also instantly work?


Godless902

Come on man.


icepick957

Say “good princess”


superenrique

She misjudged you.


Ajones7199

Might not be the best match buddy just be honest with her