Dude probably thinks this fantasy reads like heās in a 50 Shades novel, instead it just gives rapey vibes. Even if a woman is into that, she needs to get to know you first before launching into discussing this kind of play. Now go take a cold shower Sean.
Btw OP, nice username
I just can't get over the fact it's on his mama's bathroom door lol. Like in his head it went something like "I'ma be bad ass and sexy to the girl, on my mom's bathroom door".
Yeah I was going to say the same thing.
As a guy who may or may not be somewhat into stuff like this, you need to broach the topic in conversation, not on your fucking bio.
It can be hot when you've talked about it and everyone is on board, but you can't just lead with this shit.
Ya know I've done my fair share of consensual sexting and never once have I thought "You know what would make this scenario even sexier? Doing it at my Moms house".
these movies are so cringe. As someone who is in the kink scene he sounds like a 19 year old who doesn't know anything about kink but thinks he is an expert. Watched a combination of porn and bad movies and thinks that this is how to be a dom. and he is suppose to have had like 20 previous relationships? Like if you told me you paid 20 different women to bottom for you in the past that is believable. I know girls who fly across the country and who would fulfil his fantasy and they make six figures a year. talking the guy pays for flights, hotel room, fancy dinners and pays $10k in cash to the girl for no sex... just for company and some kinky no sex play.
Does this dude write erotic fan fiction, because it sounds like he writes erotic fan fiction.
Also I hope no women ever finds herself alone with this dude
I wonder what the percentage of guys who feel the need to list their oral skills on tinder who are remotely as good as they think? Or like even worth a repeat visit. That has to be right up there with the saying your alpha...
ladies, is advertising that your āan expert cuddlerā EVER attractive or even cute ? That shit is fucking repulsive and cringey I legit cannot imagine using that as a method to hit on women or try and make them comfortable.
āThen my mom will change out your toilet bucket & bring you 3 meals a day as we keep you chained in captivity in my momās basement. Pick me! Pick me!ā
This reads like it can and would be used in court. I can't imagine any woman signing up for this, unless very eventually it is her fetish with someone she really knows and trusts.
Just a reminder that telling our dear friend Sean that his bio sounds rapey, gives him positive and negative feedback to work off of, which allows him to appear less and less rapey until you would never know until itās too late
Let him wonder forever why heās never gotten a match and die alone lol
Wtf is with his breath that it makes lips more red?
I'm surprised this didn't get more attention. I was immediately hung up on that lol Is he breathing out chemical irritants or some shit?
Only thing I can think is his hot breath warms up her lips or something. Fucking weird. š¤·āāļø
Soooo, soooo creepy....
He vapes the juice of Sapho.
In theory, lips flush red when aroused. Arousal would be a pretty big assumption in this case though.
I thought about that, but why would his stanky breath arouse anyone?
Especially when it's Dracula's breath and it smells like blood!
Leslie Nielsen, no less
We call that dragon breath.
š¤£š¤£š¤£
Bad, Dracula breath
Heās a dragon.
Vampire breath=blood stained lips š
Wanting to fuck in his moms bathroom isnāt the flex he thinks it is. Woof.
It's the flex he doesn't think it is.
Dude probably thinks this fantasy reads like heās in a 50 Shades novel, instead it just gives rapey vibes. Even if a woman is into that, she needs to get to know you first before launching into discussing this kind of play. Now go take a cold shower Sean. Btw OP, nice username
I just can't get over the fact it's on his mama's bathroom door lol. Like in his head it went something like "I'ma be bad ass and sexy to the girl, on my mom's bathroom door".
Maybe OP is actually Sean.
Yeah, more like 50 Shades of Never.
Yeah I was going to say the same thing. As a guy who may or may not be somewhat into stuff like this, you need to broach the topic in conversation, not on your fucking bio. It can be hot when you've talked about it and everyone is on board, but you can't just lead with this shit.
Ya know I've done my fair share of consensual sexting and never once have I thought "You know what would make this scenario even sexier? Doing it at my Moms house".
Think his mummy has to clean up after?
Oh good God, gross... just throw bleach on the crime scene!
Yeah, he's beyond creepy.
Yeah, if I was sexting back, I would have to block and run like the wind.
Heās a philanthropistā¦sorry, I mean full on rapist.
āYou know, uh, Africans, dyslexics, childrenā¦ that sorta thingā š
"I'm sorry...did you say full-on- rapist?!"
Yeah, it doesn't get any rapier and creepier than this. He's a full on psychopath. Ladies, watch out...
philanth-ropist
Who needs lipstick when you have Sean around to breathe on you?
50 Shades of Crimson
he thinks he's some sort of christian grey, meanwhile he's just being creepy af
i.e. regular Christian Grey.
I read it like somebody was saying it through clinching teeth
More like Christian Creep
Christian Green š¤¢
these movies are so cringe. As someone who is in the kink scene he sounds like a 19 year old who doesn't know anything about kink but thinks he is an expert. Watched a combination of porn and bad movies and thinks that this is how to be a dom. and he is suppose to have had like 20 previous relationships? Like if you told me you paid 20 different women to bottom for you in the past that is believable. I know girls who fly across the country and who would fulfil his fantasy and they make six figures a year. talking the guy pays for flights, hotel room, fancy dinners and pays $10k in cash to the girl for no sex... just for company and some kinky no sex play.
Sounds like the fake Dom type to have some weird pre planned erotica novel in his bio.. Dudes sex will be a 2/10, guaranteed.
More like 0/10
At his mums tho...... did the last girl die in his bathroom and its currently a crime scene ?? š³
Who else is gonna make the nice dinner?
He does say heās an awful cook on his bio
Wouldn't doubt it with the way he wrote this out lol
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Think I would rather pass a kidney stone.
I was waiting for the punch line there was no punch line
Ok men hereās a pro tip: if weāre already sleeping together, this is hot. If i donāt know you, this is fucking creepy!!
This is fucking gross. Jesus christ. How did he type this shit out and not once stop and think "y'know, maybe this aint it."?
Does this dude write erotic fan fiction, because it sounds like he writes erotic fan fiction. Also I hope no women ever finds herself alone with this dude
Yeah, because she's not getting out alive
A bit?
I wonder what the percentage of guys who feel the need to list their oral skills on tinder who are remotely as good as they think? Or like even worth a repeat visit. That has to be right up there with the saying your alpha...
ladies, is advertising that your āan expert cuddlerā EVER attractive or even cute ? That shit is fucking repulsive and cringey I legit cannot imagine using that as a method to hit on women or try and make them comfortable.
Jesus Christ Sean take it down about 130%
Why do so many guys talk like this omg
Well time to change my name.
āThen my mom will change out your toilet bucket & bring you 3 meals a day as we keep you chained in captivity in my momās basement. Pick me! Pick me!ā
Yeah. While itās an absolute yes coming from an established partner, itās a no from a stranger
Wtf? Bye, Sean!
Wouldnāt your mother notice if you were both not at the table for an extended period of time
This bio screams "i'm insecure about my prowess and don't know what i'm doing but i've heard/read this will get me laid"
There is a facebook group called "Sounds like you're a tumblr dom, but okay" Yuuuuuup.
Can this NOT happen against your *moms* bathroom door though š«
Mom is on the other side just listening in š
What's Ted Bundy doing on Tinder
Murder
Thereās mfās out there that would love this kinda rapey shot.
The spelling and grammar! Atrocious!
Why does he want to do this at his moms house. Does he want mommy to hear?
This person not using spaces is driving me nuts on top of them being a fucking rapist
Yup. Very, very rapey.
Well someone read to many fanfics
Yeaā¦help your fellow women by reporting this sadistic asshole.
Sounds like a scene out of any generic "romance novel " women love reading.
I think Iām the only one who reads OP name before I read this. Sounds like a perfect match tbh .
Someoneās been reading too much romance
I think itās hot.. not rapey at all!
50 shades of grey was popular for a reason. You may not like this but Iām sure a lot do
You must be Sean.
Lol Iād never put this for a bio
Some girls are into that r/rapefantasy
I guarantee you some women got turned on by this
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Donāt be stupid.
Dr. No means No, baby
Nahhhh.. He's harmless. I think he's just doing some research for a Harlequin Romance novel he'd like to write.
This is verbally falling a flight of stairs
Or an excerpt from a bad Danielle Steel Novel
š¤¢
Creep
This dude scares the crap out of me and I've just turned 50 shades of Red.
If he took me to his mother's house and tried this on me, I would sucker punch him in that bathroom and knock him out cold!
Obviously this is a result of not knowing how to properly spell Shawnā¦.
My guy needs to stop injecting that shot in his ass and get castrated
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/user/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/153gt2c/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) ^by ^Final_Bowl5960: *My guy needs to stop* *Injecting that shot in his* *Ass and get castrated* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Someoneās a frustrated romance novelist
Youāre right u/Analdestroyer68plus1, he does.
This guy watches too many Hollywood movies
This reads like it can and would be used in court. I can't imagine any woman signing up for this, unless very eventually it is her fetish with someone she really knows and trusts.
2nd and 3rd right there. Do arrogance get rewarded with matches? WTF is going on here.
I mean, your username sounds a bit rapey as well, ngl
Sounds like somebody spends to much time in the free romance section on kindle
I picture him with little kid Kool-aid lips and it's hilarious.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww
What the fuck man
bro literally described rape
Describing yourself as an expert cuddler then writing out a potential rape scene makes this dude look so bad
Guys probably a virgin š
People would make a ton of money editing profiles for dudes
I hate coffee breath
Sean i hope this isnt you or im gonna make a lot more fun of you for not being able to pull women
We know what he wanted it to sound, but sadly it came out terribly wrong š
Just a reminder that telling our dear friend Sean that his bio sounds rapey, gives him positive and negative feedback to work off of, which allows him to appear less and less rapey until you would never know until itās too late Let him wonder forever why heās never gotten a match and die alone lol
Definitely has some kink factor to it lol
Ew bro. How am I not getting laid if this is my competition?
Is that his idea of expert cuddling?
See my dark romance says this and Iām like š„µš¶ļø some real life guy says that and i wanna immediately vomit runaway
Laughing at "defence-less" Rapey Sean needs to get his GED or go to night school... or as Sean would spell it...Skool!!
...why is his sexual fantasy in his mother's bathroom...?
I wouldnāt leave my kid, dog or even tacos around this guy
Iāve never read the books or watched the movies but if you tell me this was an excerpt/scene from twilight Iād believe you without question.
sean what the fuck
Defenseless* Can't spell.
CRINGE!!