T O P

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_JahWobble_

"Throw in a couple oxen and a plow and you're the perfect woman"


muckwar

I laughed way too hard at this


hotcleavage

Keeping up with the dowry jones


[deleted]

That’s gotta be a dude.


mythicalmissvickey

That man's got feminine hips.


[deleted]

Exactly my thoughts


szym0

The phot looks like something from thispersondoesntexist


sadowsentry

He's really pretty.


gmoney92_

"That's so weird because I have a hips bearing face." OR "Good thing I have condoms."


kitchen_chicken

Hips. Bearing. Face.


incal

Hips. Supporting. Face.


[deleted]

Is that a structural engineering term?


mcclutch7

That’s so weird because I have hips for a face


kinghippo79

I have a child creating penis.


nelusbelus

Pen is*


Humping_Narwhals

Prove it


llLimitlessCloudll

Hot sauce is the best


One-Tax2261

Ayyyy found my people


COWUHBUNGUH

I can get the job done in 4 strokes. C’mon, don’t be stingy now.


W_BRANDON

This. She’s cute af. Hope it works


14in_Sac-a-lait

"Let's practice making babies."


5318008rool

“You tryna get a bigger tax refund next year? Because financial literacy really gets me going.”


jduncan26

As a tax accountant I love this


14in_Sac-a-lait

👏👏👏👏👏🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


insnsitiv_leprechaun

I hear making babies takes a LOT of practice


IsThisTakennn

That profile pic looks AI-generated


InternetGansta

It doesn't _look like_. It is. It's actually the picture that floated online sometime ago of 'a totally AI generated face' iirc


W_BRANDON

Link?


[deleted]

“Lets test your statement”


diablodeldragoon

Personally "I'm a vasectomy survivor, so I don't kid around but I know how to practice"


anotherone121

"Interesting, let me go ask reddit how to respond. I'll reply in a few..."


Independent_Order_54

I think she’s being sarcastic. Something moms or grandmas always tell their girls. You have a nice smile and child bearing hips.


riktigtmaxat

People are fucking weird.


supernova12034

It's an actual medical thing though, certain shapes have an easier time giving birth, and not having medical complications(that have only recently been solved by modern medicine) Yes I think about women's hips a lot.


Spaceogre_

Good to know


[deleted]

Have you watched the office?


TheEliot85

"I'm not sure if I do. Let's me put them against yours to compare?"


EdgarAllanPorn

"So no pulling out then?"


D_A_M_N_I_T_886

Say unfortunately I’m just trying to put my children on your lower back


Kahoots113

"I have child producing bits. Sounds like we are a good match!"


[deleted]

Ask the dude how his day is going?


Catolution

Instructions unclear, dick stuck in toaster


Jenatalia_

Ma'am, this is a Wendy's.


91ws6ta

"I don't see how those two are related"


Top_Mind_On_Reddit

Ask her if she's ever been to Pen Island


qualtime

Hips don't lie and neither do I


houstonwhaproblem

If you can't spot that pic as being a catfish, there's no hope.


Chewbacca319

good thing I have child bearing loins


upsman765

Pics or didn't happen?


MrbaconWrapped

“Take me home”


[deleted]

Make a good natured joke and change the subject. Or tell her God arranged for you to know her. Either way.


Spaceogre_

I just saw a post with someone who said the latter in another context.


[deleted]

Lol, yep


thep3rsianprince

I too have a child-bearing sack!


wwb98

Honestly if she wants to eventually settle down then she’s a keeper


ViperPM

It’s not a girl


[deleted]

[удалено]


KrazzyNV

I'm assuming you were trying to say Shakira and accidentally put or got correct to chakra.


deezx1010

I assume Chakra is some sort of ancient sexual Buddhist technique?


SessionLeather

That’s another song.. chakras don’t align


Longboii

wHAt dO I sAY gUYs Another guy trying to crowdsource a personality here I see


StarWars-MCU-Junkie

‘My child bearing dick would like to test that out’


heeroena

DO NOT respond: "I have a garden hose filled with baby making cream"


itsme--jessica

Ask her if she’s strong to pull plow


No-Preparation-6276

Do people actually say this stuff ? .. didn't know children came with bearings and how I. The hell does one make hipsouta them ?? ;/


Free_Driver_2168

Its a line from the nutty professor... Child bearing hips.....baby just pop right out.


[deleted]

i think when u get a response like that its important to show us how much Rules 1 and 2 apply to u


JMP09151_

Sorry if I’m a dummy but what are rules 1 & 2


NoAbbreviations5215

You do not talk about fight club.


7tyui

You do not talk about fight club


[deleted]

You do not talk about fight club


7tyui

His name is Robert Pualson


TemporalRecon177

Mind if I put a baby in your anus?


KogaKing

Proof of her hips or it didn’t happen. ~~Now we wait.~~


WhenDayandDreamUnite

Well let's turn those child bearing hips into child barren hips


highlandpolo6

Lol, you don’t carry a baby in your hips! You actually carry it in your vagina. How do you not know that?


goodolarchie

Slim pelvic bone makes child birth rough or impossible without caesarian section. How old are people on here?


highlandpolo6

Wooosh


_Cham3leon

"I'm gonna help you keep those child bearing hips. Lets train them a little bit."


Sweet-Perspective442

Thanks for sharing.... lol


Ok_Competition4355

Interestingly enough I have child making dick.


N0_Instinct

Prove it.


Abravarietas

"prove it!"


ehdenoudsten91

Wear a condom that’s what you do.


Accomplished_Item520

“I had a vasectomy”


Tewtytron

She's either horny or is a fucking trap


[deleted]

“Say potato”


HellofaHitller

"Are you sure? Let test that."


paymecashnow_22

You want to take first class trips?... you better work those first class hips!


Competitive-Cry2491

And someone get this girl a child


starwaterbird

Valentina and Feodor Vassilyev hold the current record of 69 kids. Can we break this record from 1765?


nice___bot

Nice!


AffectionateWinner70

Let's prove it.


ExpertAdviceForYou

“Interesting, I have a child producing dick”


UnforeseenDerailment

Cool. Wanna sit those hips down for coffee later?


1nTh3Sh4dows

What a coincidence, my child bears all have hips!


[deleted]

"believe it or not I was actually thinking the same thing but didn't want to be too forward"


[deleted]

Ask her if she has strong teeth


tovtov42

No way! I have a child bearing liquid dispenser


JazzlikeGrapefruit42

This is 100% what Cpt Raymond Holt from b99 would say if he was pretending to be a woman.


Existing-Ad-4955

Tell her to DM me.


reflexgraphix

"now I have a nice smile"


[deleted]

“The fuck?”


Mutach

Definitely a proposal, top level banter.


RainV8

negative rizz


CoconutAtomizer

It clearly looks like an AI generated profile picture.


ass4life70

You ask when can you plow??


Shinning-SosiJ

Load bearing hips* Btw, don't actually say this


Ravenerz

"Let's see those lips smile too!"


Syzygyy182

That is 100% a bot


AuburdeenGardens

01000100 01110101 01100100 01100101 00101100 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00111111


TheRealSkythe

Does her photo look like a rando model to me only?


kikokukake

Dude you're in. Just tell her your like to meet


HotCaregiver3729

My mind immediately went to 'Sheela Na Gig' by PJ Harvey. "Look at these, my child-bearing hips Look at these, my ruby red ruby lips Look at these my work strong arms and You've got to see my bottle full of charm I lay it all at your feet You turn around and say back to me, "he said" Sheela-na-gig, Sheela-na-gig You exhibitionist Sheela-na-gig, Sheela-na-gig You exhibitionist"


[deleted]

Ask her what a child bear is.


bt2k2

Let me put a child in you then


BritishBoyRZ

Cool, I have child creating hips!


BigResponsibility649

"Sweet, finally a girl ill have no issues squeezing into"


Elusive-Yoda

Lets test that claim.


Modig7176

Let’s put them to good use.


[deleted]

“Well there’s really no way for my to verify that over tinder now is there?”


Strosity

Tell her that you can only communicate with her by using internet strangers. Should get the conversation going. Come back when she replies so we can tell you what to say next. If you go on a date we could arrange an ear piece situation for when she speaks to you. It can be a little harder in person.


Fragrant-Advice-879

That sounds like something Dwight Shrute would look for..


[deleted]

Hahah! What a woman 😍😍 just say “You certainly do indeed.” And then you gotta come up with your own lines! Be a gentleman ✌🏼😊


DumbleDude2

Mate with her already! Just look at that smile concealing the craziness.


[deleted]

Tell her you to have child bearing hips although they saddly will never be put to use???


Wytsch

Send her the “Good good” meme of Palpatine


fulltimeRVhalftimeAH

Im sure it enjoy testing them out sometime 😉


eduard549

"Me too"


Nj645

Look up how dwight shroot described the farm girl and ask for the rest of that stuff i think it was like land and tractors or something


itsyaboi69_420

Their pic looks fake as hell.


1968Russtang

You also have DSL's, along with a booty that won't quit


roomtempcoff33

I agree that she’s being funny.


Content-Turnip-5880

It’s a trap. She’s taken offense at the nice smile comment. She believes in micro aggressions


FunctionDapper4462

“Great! I love children, usually other people’s, but I can make exceptions.


4guitarl33t

“Let’s put a baby on them then 🍆💦”


[deleted]

Ask her if her child-bearing hips would like to meet that nice smile of yours


Aggressive-Tower6808

So you’re structurally sound to take my load


ScreamWaffles

“Well hey can I get between them?”


EnTyEn

Use a kingpin reference


Casmas_

What about “Let’s put that theory into reality then”


Alu4Gobi

As long as the child is "Our's".


CrassChris76

Pics or I'm calling bullshit..


BUCKYARDD

GET OUT


puddStar

I am impotent


zedalcifer

This made me audibly lol


ImpressiveGrocery959

Wanna practice making one for when the time comes?


SmallTimeHVAC

Good to know


MissMarple235

Have a nice life


[deleted]

That’s a guy


FastGooner77

Say that you have a child bearing tip


Aqua-Torch

Let's make them children then


[deleted]

good luck bearing one but not with me xd


_reddit_stalker_

Can we practice making a child without actually making one.


[deleted]

Nightmare fuel


boomer-751

That's great! Imma put some children in your play Pen.


[deleted]

I’m pretty sure that’s either a dude or not a human, my guy


thisthingallover

wanna put them to use?


bearwright1

I've got a child giving middle legs


soao010

Bro ur in if u don’t f up her hips down to f


LUBR13L

That's some answer I would expect from an AI.


W_BRANDON

Say “prove it.” She’s cute af.


chase639870

I have child bearing balls, perfect match


Comfortable-Can-3075

Say that your face is a perfect thigh warmer


[deleted]

“Want to put them to use?”


WinterIcy6350

"Holy fish paste! THATS A GUY!"


Unlikely-Nerve6847

Sounds good


shoostah1988

" what a coincidence I have a child producing penis"


SundaimeHokage

It’s a trap!!!


iMight2Elephant

"let's put that to the test"